ANDREW HUBERMAN and CHRIS COLE | Good For You Podcast with Whitney Cummings | EP 269
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Bap, bap, bap. Hi, everyone. We're back with Chris Cobra Cole. You got very good feedback last episode. Really? You got a callback. At this point, I don't think we could even break up if we wanted to. That's so cool. You just test too well on the internet. I test so well. What's the bee in my bonnet today? Are we going with weather? Are we going with performance? Weather? Weather? You didn't put weather in quotes? Whoa. I...

I figured you would. Bill Gates weather or weather weather? I figured you would already know that the weather is being controlled. Is it the moon landing? Is it? You didn't put that in quotes either. Okay, babe. Yeah. If the moon landing was fake and staged, I am so much more impressed than if we actually went. You're telling me there was a Hollywood production where no one got sexually harassed?

and no children got trafficked? Wait, there was a Hollywood shoot where no one sued for a toxic work environment and this was the moon landing one? What year was that?

Was this still around? It was a good old day. Was this still around when they wouldn't let women on set or hire them? Women used to be on set way more than they were now because they were editors because editing was sewing. There were actually more women back then. And then they realized that they snitch their feelings. We came up with this the other night. You said, why is it a wives' tale?

Why is it a wives' tale? An old wives' tale? Yeah. Hmm. Why is it an old wives' tale? It's like, that's basically just saying women lie. That's right. It's just like the basis of it is women lie. And we go, it's like an old wives' tale. Yeah. And especially old ones. The old ones lie even more. But you know what? Well, they have dementia and Alzheimer's. Maybe that's not their fault. Also...

Old Wives Tale. Am I the only person that in The Handmaid's Tale felt like there was a double entendre? Yeah. Is that supposed to be there or is it just a coincidence? No? I feel like you just found something sick. Because when you say Old Wives Tale, I think of an old wives tale.

Caboose. We really finish each other's sentences, don't we, Dan? Caboose. Okay. If you're me, what is the bee in my bonnet right now? We haven't told you how much we like your nails. And I love your nails.

Babe, I love you so much. Am I right? Saying that? No, I do not care. If I shave my head and you don't notice, I don't care. I love you so much, babe. You do not need to guess things like that. I'm just going to get... Are you guys done guessing? Not knowing me at all? Yes. Okay.

You're not going to make me like Bob Dylan. None of you will. There's nothing you can do. There's nothing you can say. There's no amount of movies you can make with shimily malamay.

He was great in Dune. Shimony Cricket. I'm not watching the movie about sand either. I'm just telling you, I'm not going to like Bob Dylan. There is nothing you can do. I'm not going to be inspired by the Stoics and I'm not going to think Bob Dylan music is beautiful just because he smoked a thousand cigarettes a day and said some things about birds. It's not profound. It's not touching. I don't even tap my foot.

I'm sure I'm wrong. By the way, I know I'm, I would like to also say a couple of things I've been wrong about in 2024, because I do believe ending the year, I'm trying to edify yourself and grow and evolve. You have to like call yourself out. Right. Which is why I have all the mistakes, which we will get back to in this podcast. Thank you. Start. Don't call me queen. That's my other, you know, that I'm working on this bit. Queen is, is not queen is not an earned title.

I've earned what I have. That's fair. Queen is like you were born into it. You don't deserve any of this because it was just given to you by your parents. Can you give me some other acceptable verbiage? Entrepreneur?

Visionary? Pop off visionary? Look, I'm sure Bob Dylan, is he like a Lenny Bruce or something? Like a you had to be there kind of thing? You know, like Lenny Bruce, you'll watch Lenny Bruce now and people are like, well, I'm not laughing. I'm like, well, at that time in the context, is that how Bob Dylan is? I will always reserve the right to change my mind on something. Love it. And at some point, I'll love jazz. Maybe. What if you change your mind about me? Can't stand jazz. You do not reserve the right to change your mind.

No, no, no, not at all. That affects somebody else. Me not liking jazz, for instance, that doesn't affect anybody else, but I might like jazz at some point right now. Can't stand it. Okay. Bob Dylan. I've never liked Bob Dylan. Why not? It just doesn't sound great to me. And lyrical content hasn't been my strong suit as far as I like the, the ups and downs and the way it goes. And sometimes it speaks to me.

lyrical content. Give me an example. Name him. Name a lyric. Name a lyric. I just wrote Boob Dylan. Boob Dylan, the drag queen Boob Dylan. Is that a person? I'm all in. No, I just wrote Boob Dylan by accident. I accidentally made him more interesting than he was. Yeah, like, you know, Hurricane, great lyrical content. You know what? That's kind of a jam. I like that song, but do I like it because it was in a movie about a boxer?

Did I see that movie? No. I love when people interview themselves. You know, see, every time I say something I don't like, I'm going to follow up with something. You're like, did I see that movie? I didn't. Why not? I just wasn't interested. Do I need to see it at this point? That's anyone's guess. Blowing in the wind. Is this his biggest song? How many roads must a man walk down before you? Forever Young's good. Before you. But Rod Stewart crushed it. That's not about me.

How many seas must the white dove sail before she sleeps in the sand? Is this is is he like a like a botanist? Is he like a zoology guy? He's you know what? It's like even if he writes great, the sound of it doesn't doesn't speak to me better.

That being said, I love tons of bad things. Are these rhetorical questions? How many years can a mountain exist before it was washed to the sea? Had this stuff not been discovered yet? So it was profound because there are answers to a lot of these questions. How many years can some people exist before they're allowed to be free? I guess what he does is he writes things that are like all great art that you can project onto. To me, this isn't very specific. It's really vague. So it's great. But it was also before the Internet and you could project onto it. So it seems profound. It just bothers me when men say something like condescending.

kind of vaguely interesting with the tiniest bit of pathos and we're like he's a genius like when a man's not a sociopath and he has a guitar and a stupid mustache and a beanie hat no offense Pat like he's like a genius was it because he was short like what's the thing was he short because here's what I'll say okay

Billie Eilish is brilliant. I'm a huge fan. But a big part of her allure is that she doesn't dress like a thirsty thot who's like Betty Boop for no reason. When she's 15, we were like, oh, she dresses like Adam Sandler. This is interesting. You know what I mean? She's playing a pickup game of basketball. She's dressed like you. Yeah. And there was so so not only was she brilliant, but I had an in where I was like, oh,

Was Bob Dylan at the time like no other guys doing that mustachioed? Like what was the like, whoa, who's this guy when he walked in? Yeah, I think I think certain people are just born with it. Like the mysterious like he's kind of an asshole, but like he's an asshole in a way that makes me want to know more. Like a Rolling Stone. That's a big one. Once upon a time, you dress so fine. I think he's got tons of he's got tons of hits that Rod Stewart can do better.

OK, you've gone to the finest school. All right, Miss Lonely. Oh, Zane. I did, however, have this conversation with Devo. Am I dumb? Am I dumb? Just a minute ago that I don't get it. Why don't I get it? Reserve the right now so that you can get it later. OK, just make sure you what? Just reserve the spot to get it at some point.

Just in case you change and you go, hey guys, I have a bee in my bonnet and it's with me. I love Bob Dylan now. You know? I might. Might happen. I might. I've definitely changed my mind on big things like this. Not the Beatles yet. I'm going to watch the documentary though when I have a second because I must be wrong if everyone else loves it. But I also like to be the person who goes, are we all just

Are we all just pretending we like this because we're embarrassed that we don't want to seem like we're stupid? There's a lot of people doing that. You know that's my thing, though. My thing is always like, what are you doing? You know, I grew up in an alcoholic home, elephant in the room. Like, I don't. Yeah. Like, I just want everyone to know they have permission to not like Bob Dylan if they want to not like Bob Dylan. You're not dumb. It's like the David Lynch thing where I'm like, he's such a genius. I'm like, tell me what the movie meant. Tell me what the movie meant. Explain it to me. You have no idea what you're saying. He's pranking you. But if somebody wants to explain it to me, I would love to hear it. Same. Same.

No one can. I haven't met somebody yet. Pat, Pat. Smash that subscribe button. Don't do any of those things. Okay. We don't do followers or viewers. Yes, sir. There were so few records back then when they were creating these legends. So you're telling me he's big because there were so few people doing it, that the bar was so low. And this is why I made it as a female comic, because there were so few of us. Am I the Bob Dylan of comedy? No.

You literally just described women in comedy when I started. There were so few that if you just got on stage and said anything, you could get a career. Now I know why I hate Bob Dylan so much. Well, I think when Bob Dylan was doing that poetry, it was like the other thing on the radio at that moment was like, I'm into that. I like what you just did. And that song rocks. Because here's what I'll say.

I just, yeah, I don't like pretending. You know that that's my biggest thing. I don't like being suffocated by needing to pretend. And I lost my train of thought on the other thing because Ian finances, I just, is our backdrop. And it's so funny to me. Yeah, how did we land on that? Now here's what I'll say. The Bob Dylan movie. I know you guys are pushing it on me. I did laugh out loud at the trailer numerous times. If I can approach this movie as a comedy, I'm in. I cannot...

I cringe. I cannot. I'm literally going to sweat out my nipples if I... A moment where a man in a movie who is always like the James Gandolfini type, it's like the Paul Giamatti type, the record label guy, like finds a journal with scribbles on it that is like the black crow flies. Sees its shadow. And someone's like, who wrote this? Ha!

Who wrote this? Find him now. Sign him. And you're like, am I supposed to believe? Like, dude, why don't you just take credit for it? Isn't that what you guys did back then anyway? Find this genius. It's the equivalent of finding a knock-knock joke written on a napkin in the 50s. It's exactly what it is.

That's exactly. It's also funny, too, because they're they're like they're trying to find them. And that's the whole thing. Find this guy. Or the idea that you have an invention. Right. Like if I steal your invention or your let's say your Shakespeare and I take it, then I'm like, I'm going to take all the credit. And someone's like, write another one. And I'm like, shit, I'd have to keep you hostage in the basement, you know?

might be how it works. It's so funny to me the idea of someone being like, ha ha, I'm going to kill this person, like take over there, take credit and then they have to keep... And then they break the first light bulb and they're like, ah shit. Yeah, can you make another one? The idea that they're like, oh this isn't that hard, I'm going to take credit for it and they break it and they can't put it back together. Like, you know, Edison was a genius, you guys. I am trying to figure out what he did and it is so hard. I really regret smashing him in the face with an oxbow. Yeah, we have to find the people who did this. Yeah.

Whoever murdered this man. And they're like, I've created a charity to find this person. Guys, this guy. We have to find the person. Clean the streets up. We have to find the person who did this. We can't because it's dark out and there's no lights. The Edison curse. We can find the person who did this if only there was illumination in the street. Look, I'm open to...

I say it all the time. Whatever we resist most, I'm sure next year I'll have a Bob Dylan tattoo. You know me. Not if I can help it. Huh? I will try my best. There's something about this that grinds my gears. I just wanted to, before we go into...

Babe and I are going to do New Year's resolutions for each other that we don't know. He's going to get this is I like to find subtle ways we can criticize each other that aren't toxic. It's like talking through a baby. Like, did mom not pack your diaper bag? That's right. That's right. Like, did you know? She's like, I know. Did daddy not feed you because he's too busy on his phone again? Like we do with dogs, too. The way we like passive aggressively. By we, we mean everybody else. Everybody does this.

I need to get something off my chest again. Another thing. My chest is just chock full of resentments today. I have had a change of heart with the iCarly documentary. Remember? Yeah. The iCarly documentary, the Nickelodeon takedown documentary. Yeah. I've had a change of heart about it. And I think whoever made it is sick. I think it was messed up.

I took so much, like, I mean, I watched it as fast as anybody else, but like the idea that, and I think I messed up being so supportive of it because the idea of like,

this production, exploited children, abused children, and showed these scenes of young girls holding potatoes and Ariana Grande and all this stuff. And I don't want to do the exact thing they did. So I'm going to make this brief. So we're going to show those scenes again right now without their permission and re-exploit them and show you how disgusting Nickelodeon was or Dan Schneider, Nickelodeon or not. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. I took the bait.

I'm sorry. I'm mad at myself. Shame on you. iCarly documentary. Like, that's the thing. And Justin Baldoni is... Don't get me started on Justin Baldoni. I'm happy to... This guy. Anytime someone is going on and on about how good of a person they are, how they're uncovering the truth, how they're trying to protect children, how they're trying to stand up for these... Just do it.

And don't film it. Stop filming it. Ariana Grande did not agree to be in that movie. Sorry, the documentary. I'm seeing Amanda Bynes on social media right now. Everyone's on notice. I have added her to my list. Shirley Temple. Now Amanda Bynes. Get ready. Get ready. Okay. I got my mind set on you.

OK, and watching that made me be like, hold on. So this show traumatized Amanda Bynes, traumatized all these people. And you're going to air it and then embarrass them and then make money from their trauma and then seem like a hero at the end. I would rather watch a Bob Dylan documentary.

Then your fake, heroic, self-righteous nonsense where you're pretending to protect children and pretending that you're better than the person who aired the scene of the teenager being sexual when you did the same thing to...

10, 20 years later, when maybe they finally were able to escape that nightmare, you're going to kick it up again and make it their number one Google search and exploit them again. It's even worse when it's under the guise of being some kind of hero activist. At least the pervert was sick. At least he was like, I'm a monster. Yeah, that's what I do. Yeah. You're going to try to like get an award for this movie.

That being said, you are going to speak right now. I watched it. Yeah, I did. But not the Bob Dylan movie. This was the year that a lot of creeps pretended they were good people by revealing other creeps. Right. But you did the same thing. And it's almost grosser because you pretended to be a hero about it. You patted yourself on the back after. Right.

So Ariana Grande was a teenager when she did some scene that was really upsetting and kind of sexualized her, right? We're not gonna show it here cuz that would be gross. And then they go, they did this disgusting scene. Let's play it again in this documentary 15 years later. And she obviously doesn't wanna participate in this documentary. But now everyone knows where to go to watch it. Now I can go to the documentary to watch my child pornography.

Now I can go, thank you for the reminder. It's now in a documentary. So if they took it off Nickelodeon, which I'm sure they did, now I can just go watch this documentary to be a creep. And then I can go watch Amanda Bynes be traumatized and feel like I'm a good person. What? I haven't articulated it yet, but you know I'm on to something. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm mad. I got got. I got got. I got manipulated. It's like, you know what it is? It's the same thing as the you know that my animal rescue work is mostly shutting down sanctuaries. Right. Because sanctuaries, they just call it a sanctuary. But it's really just a zoo called a sanctuary. They pretend it's a charity. It's really just a tax write off. And zoos, you're not pretending to be good people. You're like, yeah, we drug and we put animals in a box and we drug them.

And everyone's like, all right, my guy, SeaWorld. We're just monsters. Right. Okay. But sanctuaries go, no, we say we rescued this cub from its mom. What did you just say? The number one thing we know about apex predators is the moms are protective of the cubs.

Have you ever seen a bear cub or a lion cub? I'm good. You can have them. Yeah, they don't just abandon. No. If there is a cub, an apex predator, a lion, tiger or bear without their mom, the mom was killed. Period. The end. Done. Moms aren't like, can you take this for me? It's a little much. I don't have time, you know. And so that's what this is. That's what the iCarly documentary is to me now. It's let's all re-traumatize these kids.

Let's all reshow all these disgusting scenes to everybody, re-exploit them under the guise of we're good people. Also, at the end of it, what are you actually doing? You're just trying to make money, right? How do I make money? I'll just take down somebody. Let me find something to make money on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that's what it really is. It's not like at the end of that, all the money got

donated in some way or like into like a real charity or something like that it's just like I made something you know yeah I did a thing yeah and I'm just like I don't know there was an editor who was just watching that scene over and over again there were producers that were just watching that scene of Rania Grande over and over again and I'm like at any point with someone like you know what

This feels icky. Is anyone, like, I don't want to watch this. Like, honestly, I don't think this is right to watch this. Maybe we should just put in like a, there was this, maybe just describe the scene or have someone else describe the scene. Like, do we really need to show it? I hope Ariana Grande sued them with an inch of their life. You know why I'm bringing this up? Because this was to me kind of the year of people pretending to be heroes and doing the same creepy stuff.

Hey, Justin Baldoni. I'm sure. Yeah. Blake Lively. I'm sure she's been whatever. And a couple junkets. I'm not taking sides. I'm just saying it's always the guys that are like my cause is feminist men. Their causes are always what? Free the nipple. Breastfeeding in public. Free bleeding. Slut shaming. Don't slut shame women. Slut walking. Slut walk.

Because I'm going to go down to the slut walk. And if any sluts are shamed, they can come to my bedroom, which is a safe space for them to be a slut. Like, it's always this. It's always the like, I'm a hero and I'm fighting. Remember the Sound of Freedom guy was like, I'm saving kids from being trafficked. And if you just take a shower together, I could really focus more on saving more kids. I'm like, why do you have a publicist? Yeah.

Aren't you saving kids? Yeah. Hold on, hold on. So you know where the trafficked kids are and you're on Oprah's show? You're on Ellen? Can you, wait, where are the kids? Dude, it's like what Ari said when he was here. Drop the pin! With the Liam Neeson, like, hey, Liam.

Do it anyway. Remember Liam Neeson's Taken franchise? My favorite scene is when he's looking for his daughter in the brothel house. And he keeps knocking the doors down. And then there's like a passed out little girl there. And he turns to look over and nod his daughter. I love that he's just like, no, my little angel. Like, I don't give a f*** about this Romanian slut without a passport. F***.

this girl. I have a very specific set of skills. I will find you and I will kill you. If you're not my daughter, I will also kill you if you get in my way. And also, I love that he he took down the whole syndicate of brothels and prostitution just because his baby girl got missing. Hey, Liam, just do it anyway.

You guys, pregnancy can feel overwhelming. That's what's written in the copy. Can feel overwhelming? Who wrote this guy? Ritual, I love you. I have actually used your brand for realsies for almost like seven years now. The fact that the ding on my computer just went off. I'm doing business right now. And my boyfriend, I just told him to turn off his ding-dings. And he is trying to get a point out of my ding going off. But are you taking your shirt off? Are we going to fight? What's happening? Yeah.

Anyway, so we're all over the place today, but this copy says pregnancy can feel overwhelming. Well, there's like two months where you can't inhale and exhale. But yeah, the point is, when you first do get pregnant, there's so many prenatals and so many of them seem to be designed by whatever guy made the five hour energy drink sticker. I just went straight with a brand that I already trusted because I already took their Omega. And that is Ritual. I did Ritual Essential Women Prenatal Vitamin. Then I went to my pediatrician.

I know I went to the pediatrician. I'm a baby. I went to my gynecologist and she's like, you need to take a ritual. And I was like, I already am. I might as well do this for a living. And then I took her job. Ritual is designed with a mom to baby support situation in mind, delivering 12 key nutrients and just too easy to take capsules daily. So you're not like this.

Ritual includes ingredients like methylated folate. I learned all about this. Some people can't methylate their own folate on their own Zs. And choline to support baby's neural tube development. Can you imagine if your baby's neural tube wasn't developed? How embarrassing. I thought Cummings got me bullied. Like, did you see this? Like, neural tube isn't even, like, on point. Omega-3 DHA for brain and vision development. And vitamin D, not that one, not the one that got you pregnant, the other one, for bone health. What? What? What?

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today with delete me get 20 off by going to join delete me.com slash whitney and using it the code is whitney at checkout that's join delete me.com slash whitney code whitney okay end of the year 2024 what did i learn what mistakes did i make um how can i evolve and grow as a person what did i fall for this year i'll fall for things i fell for some things this year babe you

Thanks. I was waiting on that. You want to give me some feedback? Okay, so we're going to do New Year's resolutions for each other. Okay. Are yours just in your brain? All right. Yours are in a note. Mine are in a note. Okay, so babe's going through a note. New Year's resolutions. This is mine for you and yours for me as in like what you hope I'll do next year.

Or like demands of I'll only stay in love with you if you do. No, of course not. I'm leaving unless you. I think they're suggestions. Okay. Like for funsies. Don't hold back. Okay. So. But look at me. You can't look at the phone too much. We have the same eye color. We do. They're almost identical. We're probably related.

would explain a lot you don't smell bad to me really yeah so incest that's the thing is that if someone smells bad to you like their breath is super halitosis or their bo smells bad chances are you're related you've been talked about it on the podcast okay a second tada what who am i a magician yeah fucking what's that um monochromatic day of the week you'll wear the same color

whole body, same color one day a week. Doesn't matter what color you can do a lavender day, you know, but Thursdays are my monochromatic day. So I'm in all just Chris Cole shirts.

All lavender. What's the logic behind this? Because I love it. But I just thought you'd love it. That's it. You have so many cool colorways and things like that in your closet that you could truly do this. Uh-huh. You could go one day and just all sand. You know that sand, you know that. So Kim Kardashian, her employees all wear only like the color putty, like everything. Yeah.

And Sia, so I'm not name dropping. The Kim Kardashian one was in an interview somewhere. And Sia, brilliant. She only wears one color because it reduces decision fatigue. Artists should only wear one color when you're creating because it is decision fatigue, number one, in order to choose something in the morning. And it's actively distracting to avoid something, which is why clutter is bad.

Because when you're trying to focus on something, you have to actively avoid other things. So I have really been flirting with the idea. Virgil Abloh did this too. Kanye does this too, where you just wear one color. Yeah, Steve Jobs too. And that's it. A capsule outfit. It was also a sociopath, but it's the helps. Is that what it's called? Say? Is it called like a capsule outfit or something like that? Oh yeah, maybe capsule. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where it's just like you go through your closet and for Steve Jobs, it's all black turtlenecks.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blue jeans, black turtleneck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The whole thing is black turtleneck. I would love a uniform. This is, by the way, I remember when I went to a school that had a uniform. I hated it, obviously, because you just want to be unique at that age. You just want, you know. Of course. And then you're like, oh, my God. You didn't pick it. This is so great because, like, they don't have...

especially when you don't have money as a kid, you're like, I don't have the Abercrombie jeans and I don't have the J crew sweater. So like, we're all just wearing the same thing. And you don't have to like spend all morning being like, well, this make these girls like me. Well, this helped me sit at this lunch table. Like, can I wear, you know what I mean? You don't have to like, what's super cool to do a capsule outfit now, which is probably the wrong word for it, but it's super cool now because you have the other option and you can change your mind at any given time and change.

or you could just go, this is my silhouette and I'm going to wear it all the time. And it doesn't have to be the same color. It can be like all just blues, all yellows, all lavender on this Thursday. Next Thursday, it's all like blood red. Babe, this is a great one. Thanks. Is it because you see that it takes me a while to choose things? No, I just, I thought about the color lavender and you have some lavender items and I thought,

That's a cool idea. Just once a week where, oh, you want it to be specifically lavender. No, I just thought about that was where it spawned from. And then it went. We're just getting into fetishes. Then it went to beige and then like all the other colors, you know.

I love you, babe. The pants will be the hardest thing. That's a good one because I am looking for ways to reduce decision fatigue. It's like why I always remember when I ask you to please make decisions for me. Yeah. When I'm like, let's eat dinner. And you're like, where should we go? And I'm like, ah, I have two decisions left that I can make today. And you just took one. Yes. But my one for last year was just pick out all your outfits on Sunday for the week.

so that that's already done. But I don't know what person I'm going to be. You're good at packing for trips though. And it's kind of like that. That's a great one, babe. I love it. What's the next one? Oh, am I giving you all mine right now? Okay. Next one is, okay. Limiting your lotion and oil routine at night to 30 minutes. It's been a pleasure. Cannot exceed 30 minutes.

Could you? OK, what mine won mine for you? What I have for you is that you have a lotion or oil routine that exceeds zero seconds. I just swather myself in oil at this point, hoping to kiss me so I can get some on your face. My not trying to make you look young. My skin is way nicer because of that. Not trying to make you look younger, not even about anything. It's just before we go to bed, before we go to bed. That's the noise I hear.

That's the noise I hear before. That is true. You guys. That is true. As I'm falling asleep. But the good news is we got to have a white Christmas. It was just snow. It was just his skin. Yeah. Dandruff of my whole body. Just everywhere. So I. OK, if I may.

The reason that the routine takes a while is that you have to let each layer absorb. And if you put it on and then just get right into bed, your sheets are just going to wipe it all off. So I'll do a layer, then go do piddling paddling. And then I'll do another layer and then I'll go do stuff I need to get done. And then I'll do the oil layer and do other things. So I'm doing other things at the same time. Chris Cole. Okay. Does layer one and two, can they be combined and then put on at one time and then wait?

Well, every day is a different combo. Is a winding road. Yeah. Every day is a different combo. You know what I mean? But how is this impacting you negatively? Just curious. Because, I mean, do I not look younger than my own son? You look phenomenal. No Botox. Look phenomenal. Stop. Or do you want me to get Botox again? And then you're not going to understand anything I'm ever saying. Not into it. Into what you're doing now. Not into sexy dolphins? Into what you're into now. But...

A little bit of a grinding gears is you'll say, hey, babe, I want to go to bed early. And then I'll go, OK, cool. And I'll start to like, like, do my thing. And then the second thing you mean, brush my teeth. OK, you know, and you'll just that's it. And then you'll say again, you'll beg. Hey, babe, just trying to get to bed early. And I'm just like, you just took forever to do. You told me.

What? I'm, I'm, I barely, I just got here. So I take too long putting on the, the serums and the oils. Okay. Serums and the oils and the oils and serums. But it's not about how long it takes. It's about when I start is what I'm hearing. I just need to start earlier. Sure. Yeah. You know what? Cause I'm not budging. I'm not budging on the layers. Yeah. But I feel like. You'll thank me later when we're 80.

You'll thank me later. You're going to. All right. Give me another one. All right. How many do you have? Five. I got five. OK, keep going. I like them. OK. When I'm driving, babe points. She just does this hand in this hand is driving. It's just like, take this line, take this line. She won't say a word. I don't say do the like, like I just go like this to get around the truck. And she just points. I will like as and I'm just like.

Are you sure you want to do this? I've checked my blind spot. Are you sure? I know that there's an Audi directly next to me. So when she goes, everyone's on meth that drives an Audi. I can't do because there's a car here. Babe, by the way, I have to just take this as a you want to spend a lot of time in the car with me. And I love that for you. If we are taking a right on like a huge freeway, he will get in the right lane to get off on the freeway.

I don't know, 16 exits. There's 16 exits before we get off on the next freeway that is perpendicular. And you will, my thing is you go to the front and obviously cut over at the end because I'm an adult and you will just, we are just there. We are there. I drive a white truck. That's correct. White truck people.

are the most known for road rage and whatnot. I never want to be that guy. I don't want them to think that I am that guy. You already have the permission slip to do it. They already think you're that person. Just take the win. Can we switch cars? I'll take it. I would love for people to think that.

Tiger Schulman sticker. It's important. No fear. It is important that people fear you a little bit. You're too nice and you know that. So if you already have a car that makes people think you're a proud boy, just lean in. I love letting people get in front of me for the wave, that wave I live for. But back to the fact that you're right. I do that. I've started working on it.

So I get into the center lane because the highways out here are psycho. You know what else about you? You love driving. You love being in a car. I do. You're like, you're not in any rush. That's the thing. And I love that about you. Well, here's the thing, because I'm in the car so much, I've realized that you can floor it to your destination and risk your life and save four minutes or you can drive totally safe and slow.

And you're four minutes later than you would have been if you were like running red lights and potentially getting pulled over. Says the person with a motorcycle. That's different. I don't have to run any red lights. I just split lanes. I just when like I love when you decide it's about safety and. It is wishy washy. I'll tell you that at best. You're right. So I'm going to work on my driving. Literally, can you pick a lane? The fast one? I'll work. He doesn't even get an HOV lane when I'm in the car. Like, can you see me?

Am I dead? You've been dead for a long time. So I'm saying that you can still point. You can do your hand thing. Yes, sir. Limit to two points per trip. Can you increase the number of times you get in the lane that is like the most expeditious? I said I'll be working on that. Okay. And that counter resets if we stop. So if we stop for gas.

You get another two points on our way to the next. And what do I win? Um, you're on dying love. I feel like my ADD would be better. Okay. It's a distraction when I do it. Uh, cause I can't not, I don't even need you to, when I do it, I don't even need you to abide by it, but I have to like, you know, yeah, we're both too very, uh,

dominant personalities and I want nothing more than to be a more beta personality with you. And the fact that I haven't made you pull over and a switch and me drive is nothing short of a miracle. So I would like just if that happens, like if one day you say pull over, I'm driving, I will get out of the car and I will walk into the woods and you'll never see me again. I will just disappear into the woods. I won't look back.

I'm gone. That's that's what Bigfoot is. That's what that's a Bigfoot is just a dude that got kicked out from the driving bad. And he just kept walking. He's just. Yeah. And we haven't seen him because he walked into the ocean with all his clothes on. You know what else? May I add this to mine? Yeah. I also would like to go through once a week and unsubscribe from emails, mostly from Pottery Barn. Pottery Barn. I swear I buy your stuff. I know you.

I know if I want something from Pottery Barn, I know where the stores are. I know the website by now. I bought things from you guys. But the amount of emails you send me, I'm now like, I don't know, man. I feel like you're spending all your money on hiring people to write these emails to harass me and slide into my DMs instead of just just work. Focus on the products, man. The unsubscribe button is simply to verify that there is really a human. Oh, dude, I I love this. Love this.

Because nothing changes. I knew it. Honestly, I literally, I used to unsubscribe from things. I was like, how am I now getting more of these ads? How am I getting? And when I tell you every Instagram ad that is targeted towards me, I want it. I want it. Not one email. Not one email has sent me something. Pottery Barn. I usually want everything in that store. You managed to send me the one thing that I'm like,

I love that. So why don't you spend the money you would spend on all this rigmarole with like bombarding me with these like emails into one Instagram ad that I will buy right away. Apple pay done handled, you know? So, you know, I knew it. You know how much I cook, right? None. You don't know. I don't know. Do you cook a little bit? I get at least two mail, two emails a day made a roast from some, from some recipes thing. Yeah.

How I send two emails a day recipes. By the way, one time I was on I was in an Al-Anon meeting and it was an in-person meeting and this woman showed up. She had a tiny ponytail with a scrunchie this big fuchsia, the all scrunchie, tiny ponytail, like almost like a like a pig butt coil. And she was in like sweatpants and like pink Crocs with like socks. And she came in late and she shared. She's like.

You know, I'm pretty good. I'd like to share some progress. She goes, I'd like to share some progress. So my sister called me. I did not call her. It was the C word. I did not call her the C word. And we fought over like my mom's estate, whatever it was. And she's like, we fought over that and did not call her the C word. So that's that's big progress. And I got off the phone and I showed a lot of grace.

by just taking up the phone, said Merry Christmas, and then I went to a porn site and I signed her up. I put her email in and signed her up for a bunch of porn. I'm sorry about that. But she would go in and put her sister's email in to receive crazy offers and stuff. That was her little... That is way meaner. Just call me the C word.

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Andrew Huberman is here. How you doing? Dude, doing well. How are you, sir? I'm good. It's my first time on Kauai. I'm getting into it. Nice. What are you up to today? Well, Rick and I have just been walking up and down the beach talking about projects. He says hello, saying hello. Hey, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. I see that red light behind you. Only red lights.

Only no other, no other electricity besides, well, other electricity, no other lights, but only red light. What's the benefit? Because at night you can sleep better and then it, um, it helps you fall asleep. But then people forget that sunlight is full spectrum. So when people talk about red light therapy, you can get red light therapy from the thing called the sun.

too people forget that so sunlight it's all about sunlight out here but if i say i'm staying one more day but if i stay two more days i'm gonna start throwing chakas i gotta get back that's right people do that right but it turns out that uh danny's out here and a bunch of other people i've never been here it's beautiful but i i don't want to talk about me i want to hear how you guys are doing

No, Andrew, we're only talking about how you rip. That's it. That's all we're talking about. Chris will not stop talking about it. No, it's like one flat ground line done not with skis and then one little frontside grind. Cole's on a whole other level. You can't even. I've only done like one fakey impossible and it was against Jamie in a game escape because he does it.

Yeah, my foot was way up at the nose. I didn't know you could do them with the foot back until I saw Mike Carroll do it with the foot back. Yeah, but everybody did them with the foot on the nose in the beginning. All right, thanks for that. I appreciate it. These days, also skateboarders, they've always been pretty harsh. But I feel like skateboarding has entered this whole other era of critiquing. But it's good. Now that I'm no longer part of the scene, I figure...

F it. I'll just put it out there. I'm so excited about it.

I'll come out and ride again. Actually, I looked at a new place because I'm moving. I'm out of my place on the 31st because I want to move. And there's a place with a full-size wooden bowl. I got to show you. I know transition's not your thing. I'm into it. Yeah. By the way, if I say transition, I mean transition. I was going to say. How do we get it? Yeah, yeah. Just for the non-skateboarders, I just want to be very clear what I'm referring to. Yeah. Okay, here's the thing that we were talking about incest earlier.

Sorry, I misquoted you. Evolution punishes

that with what with mutations right i mean this is why like in countries where there aren't many people like you know iceland northern countries they have all these genealogy records because they understood early on even before they really understood what genes were which which is that if people reproduced with people that were too closely related to them they would get kids that were at mutation so nature nature punishes with bad mutations yeah um so and and yes there is this idea of

separately that smell in particular let's just get right down to it we're biologists here the taste and smell of somebody's breath and saliva saliva and breath respectively is an indication that like that's part of chemistry quote unquote right it's like you know like like this whole notion of chemistry is like a real thing like if you ever did a relationship where like somebody's like

smell and taste just like it's insane like you're like yeah you know and then other times you're like I don't know what the deal is but like no yeah it's like bad chemistry it's not when you think chemistry you think like mental like can you go back and forth but that's so true yeah well they tell me the mental chemistry part is important too also Andrew this is dating a skateboarder laughing

What non-binary person Bay? Who's that? Uh, uh, Chris and I, uh, have our main irreconcilable differences is he has skateboard camera angle. I guess they shoot down. We get like, we need, and she tries to get it. And I get it. Oh my God. What the hell? Um, I get it. That's interesting. It's always from below. Interesting. Yeah. Skate, skate, dude, you get low. Well,

Well, I'll give everyone a tip that I learned from our photographer, our mutual friend Mike Wayback. Yeah. Amazing photographer. So if you're going to take a selfie with somebody, you all need to look at the little green dot at the top of your camera so that eyes are up. But nobody does that. Everyone looks at themselves. That's right. They're like checking themselves. And then the photos come out with eyes down and they look like mildly sedated.

So it's what I call the fentanyl selfie. It's not a good look. But if you're looking, I'm very relaxed on vacation, you can tell. I love this Uberman. Basically, I have no gabber right now. So I have to be really careful. If you look at the green, when you pair up for the selfie, there's two things you got to remember. Show your hands, right? And eyes at the

green light up top and then your eyes will be up. This is why I stopped zooming because I realized that when I'm in a zoom meeting, I'm just looking at myself and I'm like, this is not healthy. Like I, I didn't, I didn't know where to look. Yeah. That's why you drag, you drag the box up toward the camera so you can watch them up there. Right. Right. Yeah. So when you guys have kids and you want to go on vacation, I'll watch them. I'm a good babysitter. My friends for a long time, I've been letting me, you know, what,

you know, we'll make small fires in the house, not large fires. All right. We'll do science experiments. So there was a lot of questions in the last one about whether or not you guys are going to have kids. You guys would make beautiful babies. Oh gosh. Well, I mean, that's very sweet. I would love, I've never gotten more, uh,

Had him say more positive things about a skateboarder than after seeing you in a... What was that trick? I don't even know. Faking impossible. I thought he was getting ripped. I was like, he did a fake impossible. It was on flat. It was on flat ground. I appreciate it. I don't think anybody ever did one anywhere else. Really? Think about that. Down like Belmont stairs. That would be wild. What I want to know is how anyone can make a front foot impossible look good. I've never seen anyone make it look good. Like a front foot impossible always looks good.

Not good. I never could do them. And can I ask you a question? Is it once a skater, always a skater in terms of when, you know, I think most women have to deal with like men checking out other women when they walk by. So he'll do that. And he's looking at like a staircase or a rail. He'll be like, look at that rail. And I'm like. So I catch it because like I interact with dogs the way that some

some men who don't have good filters interact with women. Like, I'll have my friends be like, hold up, hold up, slow down. And I'm like, check that out. And it's like a beautiful bulldog. And then when I see a bulldog on the street, I go, wait, wait, wait, bulldog tacks. And people are like, huh? And in the moment they pause, I'm like, I pet my dog. So, you know, skateboarders, I mean, they'll see like a

a curb or a rail or a bank or a ditch or something. And they, it's like a brain area. It's like a whole, I can't help myself. Like I, even though it's, you know, I've been, you know, not riding for years, except here and there. Yeah. I still have it in me. You can't, you can't help it. It's, it's just like wired in. So what are Andrew Huberman's new year's resolutions or do you even do besides to hang out with us more?

Oh, definitely. Definitely there. New Year's resolutions. I mean, I'm starting to actually go to bed at a decent hour, which because I have Argentine blood, which for me is like 11. Yeah, because I just have this right. New Year's resolutions. Yeah, no, no, I don't engage in drama with anybody. Like drama is a weapon.

And like, I feel like at least actors get paid for it. That's right. Yeah. I tried to watch your, your, uh, TikTok thing. I don't have TikTok, but your TikTok thing on, there's some recent actor drama out there and you did a, you did one. I got to go check it out. But like, I noticed, I was like, wow, like so much drama on like, I just go off. And so no, no drama. Like I, and I have an office for drama.

That's one. And then Rick and I were talking yesterday and I'm starting to do a lot more writing by pen and paper again. That's ours. Our news resolution is journaling, but not journaling for some other person in the future to read. Cause that's what I would do. I'd be like, am I writing this for someone to find one day? Like, is this to like, just for me? And then you can tell me what mental illness this is. Every time I go to write in a journal, the handwriting is different. And I'm like, it like,

Does the handwriting, I'm always, my OCD is just like the handwriting needs to be the same on every page. And then I just shut down. Yeah. I would, I would definitely not worry about that. Cause I write in all caps, but then when my thing, like if I've had too much caffeine or a little bit of nicotine gum, like my handwriting, just like, I'm like,

Oh, that's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, it's like skateboarding, right? Like sometimes you cruise and sometimes you're like, you just like, yeah, but there's a really cool study that came out recently. This is no BS. This is like legit. The, um,

When you write by hand, it increases, they did brain imaging, it increases brain-wide connectivity in a manner that parallels like the brain-wide connectivity increases you see like when people do still assignments. So it's a really powerful tool for creating like new representations of ideas. There's something fundamentally important about this, about writing and typing and texting.

great, like do it, but like, it's a different thing altogether. So I'm, so that's my new year's resolution is to just write more. But I always assume someone's going to read it because what I learned too late in life, which is,

Unless it's something you just keep in your head, assume somebody's going to see it at some point. Somebody asked, does this work with an iPad and an Apple pencil as well, or just pen and paper? Yeah, I think it'd probably work with an iPad and pencil. Good news about a piece of paper and a pencil. You can burn a piece of paper. You can't burn the cloud.

Right. This is true. This morning I journaled just to myself and then I tore it up into little pieces and then I put it in my pocket because they were cleaning in here and I had no reason to suspect that they were going to like put it back together, but I had this image of it. Ridiculous. And you know what? I'm just going to go back to something that, because people will sometimes tell me they're like, you changed my life when you said this thing. And I'm like, what was it? And they'll say it to me. And I'm like, that's amazing. I wish I did that. Like sometimes you, the first time you were on the podcast, you talked about emotional contagion.

And sorry to go back to the no drama thing, but when other people, even if you're not in a relationship with the person, even at whatever it is, like not allowing other people, not catching someone else's emotional contagion, that changed my life when you told me about that. Yeah, emotional. I mean, I think these days with social media and phones and everything, you just have to have so many guardrails. I was thinking this morning, I actually wrote in my journal that like boundaries is a kind of complicated term.

psychological concept. These days, I'm really into the Jocko stuff. Yeah. The discipline, just action. Disciplines over boundaries. It's the same thing. Discipline. Because then it's action-oriented. And by the way, I delight in Jocko's clarity and directness and specificity about...

things like two word responses but the other day he did a memorial post for his German shepherd who I've met Odin and it was like effusive about all these ways in which he loves Odin I was like man he's

Like, could he get any like cooler? Like when it came to the dog, he's like very effusive. Everything else. It was like, boom, two words done. Get it done. Boom. My sponsor says no email should be longer than two sentences. Any longer than two sentences. You're either manipulating or apologizing. Ooh, that's good. I know. I want your sponsor. And then boundaries are for us and not them. And usually if you have to set a boundary with someone, you're,

They're a bust anyway.

Like at this, when you're in your twenties being like, Hey, can you just not text me during work hours at our age? You should know by now. Like if I'm setting a boundary, that's like, Hey, I'm not going to be able to respond to you during work hours. Do you mind not? It's you know, whatever. It's like, you should just know by now. Right. My boundaries for me, I'm not going to engage with people that I have to set a million boundaries with. Cause you should just know better. Right. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So I haven't had a chance to listen to your podcast together, but I'm excited. Oh God. That one.

But the babe thing was really funny with Henry doing that. I like that clip. My son's first word.

that's so rad it's babe makes sense this is what happens when you hang out with skateboarders it will be your son's first word as well yeah i love you we miss you so much you too i'll be back soon i fly back uh in the day or so and i'll be around i'm gonna connect with you guys thanks for bringing me in you guys have been super kind to me i appreciate it you know the you know making sure i'm not you know and uh rick sends his love and um yeah we'll we'll

we'll be in touch i hope i get to see you in austin next week yeah i'm supposed to be out there austin's jumping off right now i feel like austin is an amazing place la too of course everyone loves in the bay area is like making this big comeback it really is because i was actually just thinking about that i was actually just thinking about that yeah i nonetheless i plan to go there as little as possible just for my for my own reasons is a great place but because it feels like uh like

Like, I love it. I'll go there to see certain people, but I need to wait. I need to wait and see how it, how it emerges. Anyway, that is boring for this. Someone just asked if Chris and Whitney are dating. Nah, she's just sitting on his lap for this live. Come on. I'm just so unprofessional. Like in my podcasts.

I just hold men captive. I'm like the female Harvey Weinstein. I'm like, hey, come sit on my couch. Only you, Cannon, would say that. Last question, though. Who's watching Henry? I have the most amazing, amazing... Henry. Henry. I have the most amazing nanny, Saiva, who is with him right now. He is learning Spanish. I'm like, please teach him Spanish so that he can survive in this world. All right. Well, love you both. I love you both.

Okay, so my last one was journaling. I really need to do, but let me ask you a question. Will you hold me accountable for this? Of course. Easy. I really need to do that. Yeah, you do. So you can read it? Here's my problem with journaling. I won't be able to read your handwriting. Here's my problem with journaling. Number one, every time I write with my hand, the handwriting's different and I scare myself.

I'm like, who's this person? Yeah. Every time. What is that called? Schizophrenia? No, you know, like when you black out and like the ghosts write for you. I don't know. The viewers know. Okay. The viewers know what I'm talking about. I'm just saying every time I write, I'm like, da, da, da. And then I'm the next page. I'm like, who? Like, am I a million people? Like, am I okay? Yeah.

And then the other thing is I have a problem with, and again, I don't know what psychiatric diagnosis this would be, but when I write in a journal, I'm like, do I write this for other people to read at some point? Or...

Who's it for? Who's the intended audience? Chances are that you'll have dementia the day before the day you planned on burning it. You know what I mean? I just mean, is it for me to read in the future and be like, oh, whoa. I was so insightful. I mean, I'm just worried that someone's going to pick up my journal and be like, who wrote this? Give her a deal now. Dig her up. Now. And they'll be like, Whitney Cummings.

What? So for me, I guess I just it's hard for me to write in a journal and not start to do lists and not turn it into a business. I'm like, I should write a book about this. Like, you know what I mean? I'm like, that's why you have to limit yourself to five minutes. That's so little time. Yeah. But five minutes just to like there were two take homes of the day. If you did two take homes of every single day for five minutes, like it'd be huge. And we do that anyway as we're falling asleep.

Why don't we make each other? Yeah. All right. Well, I agree. Those were my five. One thing I do think that you would love that would make you happy is like a G.I. Joe. Those were tiny is listening to podcasts. I used to listen to podcasts. And what happened? I started actually talking to my friends.

I started outreach. I started reaching out to my friends to talk and to try to be a better friend. That was actually this past year's resolution was to be a better friend and start calling up my friends. Yeah. Yeah. And so you stopped listening to podcasts to call your friends? Yeah.

Like I used to just listen to podcasts or listen to music. See, this is something maybe this is what we this is maybe your next year one. And I think this is why you're such a good athlete and so good at what you do is you're like, I'm doing this or I'm not. Because you can also listen to podcasts and call your friend. Oh,

And you can talk about the podcast with your friend. Like your brain is like very black and white thinking. You're like, I can't listen to a podcast because I have to call my friend at some point today. So I, and I can't because when I call the phone does one thing because you know what it's like, it's like having the cold plunge or the hot tub. I don't, you doing both as wild, like going from a hot tub right into the cold. Like people do it. I don't know how you do it. I, when I'm on a call, I'm on a call. And then it's really hard for me to go from call to

to listening to other people on a call interesting you know huh like now i'm on podcast you're like i just was doing a better version of this yeah it's like that it's like guys i don't i don't like can i i just i was having a great podcast with my best friend actually can i get a podcast of my best friend so it's like too much input i do actually you know what you would love sorry yours

After I leave here and I miss you and I want to hear your voice, I listen to your podcast. Come on. Swear to God. Swears to God. No, I think that you don't listen to podcasts because you don't know that there are ones out there custom made for you.

Like you love trivia stuff like there is a podcast out there. It is about the making of the music video of pop up video. There is some there is a podcast out there that is about the band, the sword. There is a podcast out there about woodworking. If you have a skate injury like, you know. Yeah. And you would love it. Yeah. I did listen to Wood Talk.

which is a woodworking podcast and you can only imagine but you have to be like into it where you're just like so the tannins in the wood got it wood talk yeah they're talking about woodworking what a wood it just doesn't roll off the top wood talk wood talk it does definitely sound it sounds like a sounds like a town in pennsylvania sounds like a town in pennsylvania yeah like native american name i love you babe thank you for your resolutions

You're very welcome, babe. I love you more. You don't love me. You don't know that you love me more. That's a fake statistic. And I'm okay with that. What, don't we ride? Elephants. I'm so sorry. Oh, my goodness. Excuse me. I didn't realize you were in royalty.