I'm a Russian Asset!? | Good For You Podcast with Whitney Cummings | EP 279
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I'm a stand-up comedian and I am on tour. WinnieCummings.com, you know what to do. We're rolling. Okay. Pat, you better give me an action. Oh, shalom, everybody. I am in a hotel room in Reno, Nevada. Had a show here last night. Had not been able to record the podcast this week. So we're just doing this in hotels. I mean, look, like...

Podcasts, they're getting bigger and bigger. They're getting fancier and fancier. Chris Williamson has a new studio every week. Joe Rogan gets a new podcast every 20 minutes, and it's got, you know, skulls in it from the Siberian Mesozoic era. Kendrick Huberman is doing his podcast in a spaceship. Everyone gets fancier and it gets fancier. The cameras get sharper and they get sharper. You know, Schultz has, you know...

15 new sidekicks every morning when he goes in. I'm out here. We go the other way. We had a nice podcast studio. Then it got even nicer. And now I'm in Reno, Nevada on a couch that you could not pay me enough money to take a black light to the couch upon which I am sitting currently. Okay, I believe...

I have had my most recent tetanus shot. I am looking at the mountains, though. This is very beautiful. Hold on. Can you see? That is the Sierra Nevada Mountains or a simulation, whatever you believe. Okay.

I do feel like we're now at the point, you know, like when someone says like, like, you know, the universe or God, whatever you believe, like you have to kind of say that when you're like, I just believe that the universe put this in my path or God, whatever you believe so that you're like, you know, able to address both both type of person's reality. I do the same now with just things. I'm like, that's a mountain range or a simulation, whatever you believe. Yeah.

Anyway, I'm on the road and I'm going to start doing podcasts on the road in hotel rooms. You know, in between traffickers. You know, I think this is good. This is like, you know, I'm like Anthony Hourdain. Please. I'm just going to get to it, everybody. I have kind of a humblebrag. I am...

kind of a big deal for me. I know this has been award season. People are getting Oscars, they're getting Emmys, they're getting Globes, they're getting all the things. I have gotten something way more sort of career signifying an award, a title way more impressive than any of the affirmation naked men trophies, which is

Pat, I've made it. I don't know if you might not even know this. I have made it. Do you know how I've made it? I can't wait to hear. I'm dying to hear because I thought you already did, but now you really did. No, no, no, no, no. I was an anonymous nobody until like three days ago. I've made it. Congratulations. Thank you. It happened, you guys. I have been accused of being a Russian asset.

What? I know. I'm going to ship you a cake this weekend to your next hotel room. A poison cake, like a hemlock cake. I honestly, there are certain things in what I do for a living that are the moment you like, no, you made it. If someone accuses you of being a Russian asset, it's like, you think that I'm that important. You know, like when someone accuses you now on the internet of something, you're like,

That is really should be an insult, but they don't realize they're just saying that you're like super important. Like, really? Like you think that they would pick me to be an asset? Really? Like, thank you so much. And here's what happened. So I don't know if you saw this, Pat, but I made a joke about Zelensky being at the White House because, look, you know me.

Mommy hates having sponsors. You know, reading ad copy drives me nuts. Like I just, I get so bored and I am doing whatever I can to make sure we never have sponsors for this podcast. So I decided why not make fun of Zelensky at the white house? I know this was like a week ago. Remember when Zelensky was at the white house and they had this whole meeting. I don't think any of this was a good idea. Why, why are we watching this? First of all, why are we watching MMA with politicians? Yeah.

In the White House, like it all felt so staged to me. It all felt so inappropriate. I mean, and for inappropriate to use that at this point on any political administration is so ridiculous. Like we still haven't even addressed the pee tape from eight years ago. Like I feel like anyway.

I just felt like, can you guys get a WeWork? Like if I can shoot a podcast in a hotel room, you guys can have a Zoom with Zelensky to handle this and we shouldn't be filming it and watching it. Anyway, so I approve of none of it. I think all of it is insane, but I post it. And as you know, I always know when I'm about to get in trouble with a piece of content I posted when I get a bunch of texts right away from comedians who were like, that was so funny. And I'm like, oh no, come on.

Comedians thought it was funny. I got to take this down immediately. That's that whenever I take something down, it's always that I'll get a text from a comic. It's like, that was awesome. And I'm like, I got to delete that. So I knew that was a problem. So I was making fun of the meeting. I've always make fun of Trump. You dorks. You never make fun of Trump. Can you just the amount of time you write that?

Whitney, you're MAGA. Whitney, you've been red-pilled. You're defending Trump. Can you just, instead of writing that comment, just Google Whitney Cummings Trump and see all the times that I've made fun of him? And then, if you still want to make that comment, fine. But like, you know me. I'm too left for the right. I'm too right for the left. You know me. I'll never fit anywhere. So, Zelensky, in the meeting, his body language was very like...

I basically said he had two phones energy. Like, this guy has two phones guy energy. You know? Like, he's very, like, defensive. Like, he looked like he was, like, getting yelled at. Like, he very much looked like a guy who is coming to terms with the fact that he never gets to go to Miami with the boys again. Like, it was very, like...

All right. Like it's a joke. Every girl knows what I'm talking about. Every girl knows what I'm talking about. And also, by the way, Zelensky started as a comedian. I'm allowed to come for Zelensky. All right. We had the same dad. All right. We're we get each other. But people are coming at me like I'm pro Russia. Like, what are you like? That's just so wild to me. If you've listened to the podcast, you know that I make fun of Putin truly all the time in a way that is actually like should be studied.

I mean, how long have I been making fun of Putin? I have been obsessed with the fact that Putin has doubles for so long. I did this podcast about Silvio Berlusconi. I'm just obsessed with monsters. The guy's a monster. What do you mean? What do you mean? He poisons his friends like for like for fun. Like the guy. Can you imagine? And we did a podcast episode when the war started, which, by the way, I say all this again as the OCD comedian going.

We think that's when it started. We know nothing about what comes out of Russia. We know nothing. None of it. Like, it's all just, like, fabricated. So the fact that it was like, well, this happened and this happened. And you're like, okay, maybe. Dude, here's my thing. I'm one of the few people that loves it when an appliance breaks in my house because I'm like, ah! There's this Russian guy that comes and fix stuff for me and I get to ask him questions about Russia. I'm like, ah!

And he comes over and I was like, so do you guys like like read the news? He's like, there's no news. What news? Like he's like, what are you talking about? He's like, we're trying to stay alive over here. Like it's the concept of truth or news has been so gone for so long. And I'm always like, how many Putin's are there? Five, six like there. That place is a different reality. It's a it's a different level of sinister evil that is so incomprehensible. So I've talked about this. We did a podcast with two friends of mine.

So, I'm not going to defend myself against you dorks. All right. But also, I'm also not going to pretend that I know what we should do with Ukraine because that's mentally ill. I don't know about international politics. That's not my expertise. But I do know about the body language of a man.

Who is being defensive and who has two phones? And I believe I believe Zelensky has two phones. I would put money on the fact that Zelensky has two phones. I mean, look, Putin has no phones, probably. I mean, Putin's got no phones energy. He's got one phone for each double, I feel like. But he's not. It's just it's so funny to me that people like, oh, you assume that he cheats on his wife. I'd hope so.

If if we're trying. OK, if Ukraine is trying to defeat one of the greatest psychopaths in history, I would hope he's a psychopath. I would hope I would hope. OK, it's just so funny to me that you're like and he's a good person. Well, if he's a good person, he's not going to win and we should stop sending money. I would hope this guy is a thug on the level of Putin. So he has a fighting chance.

People, I just, it is, you guys are such dorks. How dare you make fun of Zelensky and assume that he would ever lie. What are you even saying, dude? I do believe that...

Anyone that is decided to take on a war should be a conniving, cheating, lying monster. And I want look, I want my war heroes to have a side piece massaging their back who has an urn full of cocaine for them so that they can hop in at any moment. OK, they better be pulling all nighters mapping out how to win with the with their side piece massaging their Achilles heel.

I know what a lying man looks like, okay? He probably doesn't... By the way, he probably doesn't even know that he's lying. Once you're running wars, you don't even know what's true or false. So even if you think you're telling the truth, you're lying, all right? He's managing four billion... There's four billion dollars no one can find. I'm sure he does... I'm not saying he spent it on hewers. I don't know. I'm just saying, how could you possibly tell the truth if you don't know everything and nobody knows anything? You know, I just...

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We get a lot of feedback on the ads. It's like, hey, Whitney just went on a 45 minute tangent about Shirley Temple in the ad that was just about the personal styling coach. Can you I don't know, maybe like check her into an asylum and Caraway. I am completely obsessed. So I started cooking recently. I decided like I already had a kid. Maybe it's time to be a wife.

Dyslexic till I die. I also am so sick of ordering out. So I'm like, okay, I am going to start cooking, but I like everything. Someone came up to me about the other day and goes, I love your thing about how it's impossible to find water. And I was like, what? Like, you know,

I was like, what? He was like, you know how like you can't drink water. And I was like, no, you can't. And he's like, no, you said that. And I was like, when that that's. And he was like, you were ranting about how you're like, how do I drink water? I can't drink it out of plastic. I can't drink it out of the tab. Like, where do I get water? Like, I'm dehydrating to death in a first world country.

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It is actually kind of wild that the thing that makes people stop defending Zelensky like wild is when you tell them that he tried to be in the Oscars and he was on the cover of Vogue. Remember during the war?

Not saying not taking sides here, but like, where's the money? Four billion dollars is missing. Everyone's like, oh, it's never. It falls through the cracks in a war. Four billion dollars. It comes, it goes. And then you're like, well, you know that he tried to zoom into the Oscars two years ago and everyone's like, wait, so he's a pedophile. That's the thing that gets people to stop defending him. You know, he's on the cover of Vogue, right? Everyone's like, wait, what?

What? I'm going to donate to Putin now. Like, it's so wild. Any association with Hollywood, not like all these people have died in a war that, you know, may not need to be happening or, you know, whatever. Like, it's so funny that that is the thing where people are like, OK, well, that guy's a monster. You're telling me that he zoomed in and was going to present an award for

With Clint Eastwood. I need to rethink this whole thing. It's so wild. That's how. People hate. Hold on. Hollywood is now worse. Than killing. It's like.

Genghis Khan, look, he had to do what he had to do. Wait a second. He went to the Emmys. Oh, God. OK, this guy, this guy is a monster. This guy's a criminal. Look, Saddam Hussein. OK, hurt people hurt people. We don't know their culture. This precedes us. You know, sometimes the ends justify the means. You know that he he got a ticket to the People's Choice Awards. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, I didn't know that.

Wait, so the guys are creep? It's like that's how bad Hollywood is viewed at this point. That's all it takes. You know what it is.

I believe that people are mad at me about stuff like this because you can't pin me down. And it's annoying. Trust me. I hate it too. Like, I'm like, I'm like that fly in your kitchen that you can't get. You just can't get it. You can't get it. You can't. Didn't you hear it? You hear it. You can't kill it. I'm still there. I just, I refuse to pick a side. I just refuse. I do not have enough information to pick a side in any situation. And I,

I don't know. It's also just like, you guys are like, when is Russian asset? When you got this wrong? Oh, sorry. I guess I don't have the same internet that you guys have where everything's true. Where do I get that one? Where do I get it? No, no. Is it Best Buy? Do I, is it Starlink? Like, I guess I have the wrong internet. And you guys have the one that is factually correct. And my bad. I'll get on top of that. Yeah.

I just I change my mind every day. I have no allegiance to the person I was yesterday. And this is who I am. You also by the way, this is just the tip of the iceberg of how much you will not like the fact that I refuse to commit to a take or a team or a political party. It's it gets worse than that. How about that? It gets worse. I switched NFL teams. That's that's the kind of person I am. All right.

OK, I grew up Redskins, right? Went to Eagles. OK, went to Eagle. Do you know how that is? Like what is that like Aaron Burr level betrayal to go from Redskins to the Eagles is next level betrayal within the NFL. So I go to the Eagles and then what happens? I'm pro Eagles, hardcore Eagles. Then what? Michael Vick comes along.

He has a dog fighting ring in his basement. I'm out. I'm a Browns fan for like four or five years. Okay. I'll switch NFL teams. Went back to the Eagles because go birds. But I don't, as soon as I see some stuff that's shady, I'll go like, nevermind. Loyal to nobody. Loyal to nobody. Okay. I'll go from Trader Joe's to Whole Foods in the same day. I'll leave this stuff in my car and walk out if I see something I don't like.

I also just like, it's so wild. Like people in my comments are like, and you're MAGA now and blah, blah, blah. Like, what are you, what are you saying? These might just be bots, by the way. Every episode, am I just responding to Russian bots? Wait, that's so funny. Every episode, I'm like, you guys are saying this and saying this. And everyone's like, no one says that. This is like, I'm just, you know, dead internet theory. The idea that like most of the internet is just Russian bots. And I'm just like, because I do, I will go to their page and they have like two likes and zero followers. And I'm like, oh, I don't know.

It might not be real, but it is interesting because when people say that, I'm kind of like, OK, again, I have notes for both sides, but it is so wild. The left has gotten so weird. It's it's no longer free speech. OK, because you could just go, oh, Whitney did that joke and it wasn't funny. Just say that. Just say it wasn't funny. Like, fine. But it's like no longer the free speech party, but it's still the free the nipple party.

which is basically saying, take your shirt off and shut up. Wasn't that the right? Like, am I wrong? I feel like I'm losing my mind. You know, no creeps allowed at the slut walk. No creeps allowed at the slut walk is so don't, don't look, don't make me feel uncomfortable at the slut walk. You're ogling us at the slut walk. Also my favorite new slam besides Russian asset is, is grifter. Yeah.

Have you noticed grifters like a new thing people say? It's so wild to me because it's like, I love an insult where you think you're insulting the person, but you're actually insulting like a giant group of people.

around the person. So when you call someone a grifter, you're, you're not really insulting them that much. You're just saying that everybody that likes them, however many million people are dumb. Like you're actually just calling a bunch of people dumb that, that like the person. And you're like, Oh, you're not going like, you know, for the person you're going like, Hey, all of you are so dumb that you fell for this grift.

I'm like you didn't even get me like I love it when someone insults someone and misses every anyone who works for anyone we're all grifters that's what we do like you mean employee like we're all grifters what are you talking about anyone on tv it it's what you're a grifter and you're grifting off this I guess that implies that you're um what's the word like uh taking or something from a

What does grifter even mean? Grifter is like you're using something. Because anyone that calls me a grifter, I'm like, well, aren't you going on social media using me to get clout? Isn't that a grifter? Like, if you're calling me a grifter, I guess you would know. A grifter is a con artist, someone who swindles people out of money through fraud. Well, okay. Then fraud, fraud, fraud. I mean, I hope I'm a fraud.

I mean, I would hope so. Because you know what it is? It's like, it's like when people say, like, be yourself. It's like, I'm always like, well, like, be the best version of yourself. You know, don't just be like yourself. Be like, is being the best version of yourself or by the way, the worst. Oh, God, I do the other way. I'm the worst version of myself all the time on at least for camera. But I thought that was called being authentic.

You see, you dorks, you got to get your insult straight. As a roast comic, nothing offends me more than sloppy insults. What if I'm just being authentic, though? Hold on. Hold on. Am I a grifter? But I'm being authentic and this is my truth. Now what? What if it's my truth? Your truth is that I'm a grifter and my truth is like, this is my authentic self. Like,

Now what? Like, I just love that people throw this stuff out and have absolutely no idea what they're even saying. And also, by the way, we're all grifters. We're all selling our wares, peddling our wares. We're in TikTok shop. We're all grifting off each other and we love it. It's like saying gold digger almost, you know what I mean? Anybody who is trying to pay their bills,

on some level has to pretend every now and then. I just, it's weird because comics, I feel like we're the ones that are like relentlessly not pretending to a fault. Like I wish I could grift more. I really, honestly, someone calling me a grifter recently makes me want to grift because I would kind of have the career I want. Yeah.

I think it used to be sellout. That used to be the worst thing that you can be. And by the way, sellout, I don't even take that as an insult because anyone that is working and trying to get their bills paid, if you had the level of credit card debt that I had when I was 22 years old, like it's we're all working for someone bad. Anyone that's working for any company, eventually it's Saudi.

Always. Right. It's just like I'm working for this mom and pop shop and they have two stores. And then, oh, their investor was this person, this person, Hamas. Like we're all working for some company or corporation. Everything goes back to like General Electric, some gas company. We're all working for some kind of evil empire, even if it looks like we're, you know, like my work for Burt's Bees, you work for Clorox. It's just it's we're all.

Doing the best we can. We are all in some way working for a company we don't even know exists right now. Some shell company that's going to be the subject of a four part documentary in four years. So let's all just give each other a little break for the way that we're grifting to get our bills paid. Thanks.

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Go, hey, guys, 4B, dailylook.com, promo code Whitney, trust me. Let's just get into it. You know that every episode now I'm just killing time before talking about the Epstein list. Now, here's the thing. People, when I talk about the Epstein list, they're like, well, it's not going to come out because Trump is on it. Okay. He talks publicly about them being friends. I love that people say that as if they're like, I got the scoop. There's photos of them. That's not a secret. Trump, they're...

What do you mean? They have like photos at Olin Mills together that they took like Epstein and Trump. Like he's he's open about the fact that they were friends. Like, what are you talking about? Oh, I do think, though, if Trump went to Epstein Island, he would have taken his own plane. You know, I think he's like on some I'm going to take my plane wherever I go stuff. So I don't know if he would be on the bar. But I think there's like paintings of them together. I mean, I don't I don't think that that's it's a secret and he's not trying to keep it a secret. I just I don't think it's going to come out. Here's why.

Number one, I think it would cause like mass chaos, mass chaos. And by the way, not that that's a bad thing. The chaos should happen. My question is this. If someone's on the list of

and like their daughter or their friend, like, is there any kind of thing? I don't know why I'm trying to give them the benefit of the doubt here. Uh, cause everyone's a monster who's not releasing this. Uh, if these people are just roaming free, but is there anything about like the safety of the families? Cause there is a thing a little bit, my brain goes like, uh, all these monsters that are on this list that should be in jail. Like they have daughters, they have wives may or may not have known about it. I don't know. Um, uh,

is it kind of that too is the idea like let's protect all of their families before we release this or something I'm being too generous

No. Okay. And they've released. That'd be a good excuse. By the way, they should use that. You guys should take that. Take it. I just gave you guys a good reason to stall. If they came out and they were like, hey, guys, there's a lot of big names on this list. And they have daughters and they have sons. And, you know, these people are, you know, they're the daughter. They're 20. They're trying to start their lives. This is going to I'd be like, you know what?

OK, OK, OK, OK. You don't have to release the list, but at least put them in jail. If you guys. OK, this is it. If you guys have the list releasing it, at least put the people in jail that are on it because you have it. You know what I'm saying? That makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. They're not going to go to trial with a bunch of people. They couldn't possibly spend enough money to take all of those people to trial.

Those people are all wealthy enough to defend themselves to the end. So after the list is released, there's going to be tons of trials? If any of them are being accused criminally, they would go to trial, I'm sure. They would defend their life against that. But they've already released thousands of documents. They're just redacted like crazy. And...

The flight logs have been public for a long time. Yeah. There was a specific victim and victimizer list that they were going to put out. Everyone who's been on the plane, that's been public info for years. But I think people know the plane stuff. This is... Everybody knows this. But you can go on a plane that's owned by someone else and not know it's... Like, all planes are owned by other people. Like, remember when 50 Cent and... Was it Roland Emmerich got in that fight? Because...

Because if you rent a plane, it can belong to someone else. Yeah. It can be like, oh, so-and-so was on an Epstein jet, but they rented it through NetJets and didn't... So I think people are kind of like, oh, those lists aren't that helpful, right? The list that everyone was thinking that they were going to release was a list of actual victims and people who they say were their victimizers. This is why we need to get this list out, you guys. Because...

I'm just going to say this the only way I know how. If the victims start getting older, like in their 30s, that's when people stop believing them. You know I'm right. Okay. There was a documentary that came out about Epstein, and the girl was a little bloated, and everyone was like, oh, she's lying. It's got to come out when they're still young.

That's the only time people like, oh, yeah, they would have that would have happened to this girl. But when you wait so long that you get the girl now has a thyroid issue, you know, it doesn't have foundation that matches her face perfectly. And she's doing her own makeup and drawing her eyebrows on. Everyone's like, no, no. I feel like Epstein's bar was a little higher for the aesthetics of his operation. I'm trying to say this delicately. I'm really trying to say this delicately. But you know what I mean, right?

You know what I'm saying? A billionaire? Really? Huh? A billionaire? Really? I'm just that's what happens is that once so much time elapses that the victims are now perceived as not trafficable. People start going, they're not who they were. They're no longer who they were.

I'm just saying that's what ends up happening. And then you see all the... Remember when the Cosby thing happened? And then all these women... Because it was 40 years ago. So all these women started showing up. They're 70 now. And everyone's like, uh...

I don't know about that. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know that if he put you to sleep, I mean, you're 20 minutes from the grave anyway, grandma. And I was like, well, no, they didn't look like this 40 years ago when it happened. Okay. This is, it's so uncomfortable to say this, but you know, that,

I'm right. You know that I'm right. So much out of that. What? I'm going to try to I'm going to tidy that up. Don't cut it. Don't. I will say this until I can say it in a way that is elegant. But as a woman in a. You know, I'm right.

This is what they do. How about this? This is what they do. You know, put in every version of me trying to say this. And then in the comments, you guys, please tell me the way that I should have said it elegantly. I believe sometimes they wait so long to get the guy that is trafficking kids that by the time the kid has grown up, they're like, she's kind of busted. That's what they do. Guys will go, oh, no.

I don't know. She's not really worth trafficking. I don't know if they would have flown her all the way to Dubai with that chin. I don't know. They're not going to fly a size four all the way to Epstein Island. She was she. Time is working against them in every sense of the story. When the victims come up 25 years later and they're kind of like, oh, well, this guy dated this girl who's, you know, he's way out of her league. He threw her a bone.

He jumped on a grenade, quite frankly. And then when you see the girl later who's grown up, they're like guys start judging them. They're like, well, she's like a six. No one trafficked her. Like that's what happens. I'm telling you, that is what happens.

You got to get them when you got to get the. Why am I in trouble? I didn't traffic anyone. I'm not a psychopath. I'm just saying get the list out before the victims are at a point where people are going to go. I don't know. I think Epstein would. I don't know. You got to strike while the miners hot. Yeah. I mean, should we give it? Should we give out a Zempik in the in the victim package?

That's what they do. Do you remember when the Cosby thing happened? Everyone was just making fun of how old and ugly and busted the women were going like, I think Cosby could have done better than that. And you're like, well, they're 80 now. I think here's the real reason the list is not coming out and never will, is that we forget it is not left and right. It's both of them. You guys have to understand that when it comes to the left and the right, the one thing that these parties do agree on is

is that they should be able to abuse kids. That's what unites them.

That is what unites them. It's not the left or the right. It's both. You know that in the Hamptons that politicians from both sides live next door to each other. They get each other's Amazon packages. They're like, hey, Nancy, did you, the garden guy, did he not come today either? Like Steve Bannon and they're all, they all know each other. Their kids go to the same schools. They go to the same acupuncture people. They go, they all, they, they, they have their friends. It's like,

Politicians from both sides, they're like NFL coaches. Yeah, they're rooting against each other. But when they like run into each other at private airports, you're like, what's up, dude? So, yeah, that's a doctor. Are you like they're all they're all friends. They go to the same vacation spots. They go to the same private airports. They run into each other like we're the ones fighting.

they're friends. Okay. They have a mutual assured destruction situation they have going. So even though they fight about everything, when it comes to Epstein, that's like, I think we can all agree this should not come out. Right. This is what unites them. So it's just so wild that we think one administration is going to be more pro this coming out than the other, you know? And the one other thing I'll say about this is like,

You know me, have to do it. Being too pro the list coming out is weird too. No one wants the list to come out, you know, whatever, more than me. We all want this, but of course I want it to come out. Of course I want the list to come out, but being too into it is weird. Wanting the list to come out, that's the take. But for it to be like your daily cause is a little fishy.

You know what I mean? It's like when the theater kids are anxiously awaiting in the hallway to find out which character they get to play for the next six months. That's so funny. Because then they get to pretend to be mad at Tom Hanks or whatever. Well, you know that I'm always suspicious of people that work too hard to be righteous heroes. It's like, hold on, hold on. Why do you care so much? Like, why do you... Why is this your pinned tweet? Like, why is this your...

bio your hinge bio are you working a little bit too hard to make people think that you're not a creep like of course we want the list to come out but if you're like a maniac about where's the list where's the list and then the list like I would like 20 minutes with your laptop just 20 minutes will just I think like as a girl you have to understand when a guy is too anti-creep you're like wait

What are you up to? Why are you working so hard to throw people off the trail? It's hard to explain the suspicion that I have. But, you know, when Sound of Freedom came out, I was like, there's something up. There's something up. And I can't put my finger on it. And I know people are going to say, Whitney, you're pro sex trafficking. Of course not. But a guy who's like going on the Drew Barrymore show and has a publicist and wants to let everyone know how many...

sex traffic victims they've saved. There's something up cut to him trying to make girls shower together. I'm just saying there's something odd about being too into it. Both sides don't want this list to come out. They've united on this. Both sides do not want this list to come out. And I believe the proof of that is Epstein dying in his cell.

One side couldn't have done that alone. They worked together. The cameras were off at the exact time. OK, the rights not known for they're not the I.T. people. OK, the person, the number of people that had to help orchestrate Epstein, Epstein,

being removed that was both of them together don't you think because if it was just one party the other party would have got on that right away like they were together like we gotta this guy's gotta go you guys like this they had to work together on that and then I think about Ghislaine that all I can think about is Ghislaine can you imagine her in the cell just what what's she doing in there is

Does she know? Is she being briefed daily? Is she getting like, okay, this is coming out. She's just constantly playing like Tetris and chess with all this stuff. The fact that she's still alive says a lot, don't you think? Does she have hard drives? She's got hard drives everywhere, right? In every bunker, every mount, and she's just ready to go like,

Yeah. Pull a trigger at any moment. There's no way she didn't have a plan. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I did. She had so many backup plans. I think at a very early stage in this crime ring, she realized these men are sloppy.

These men are sloppy. As soon as that painting of Bill Clinton in the dress and heels showed up at Epstein's apartment, she was like, you guys are sloppy. Like I picked the wrong group of dudes. He's like malignant narcissists that believe they are completely impenetrable, completely above the law. I got to have a couple. I got to have a drop box. If I go for one jog around the prison yard,

release this or tell this person we have this. I'm just riveted because they can't they can't kill her. Right. People that this is this is my other. I'm obsessed with the idea that so many powerful leaders all over the world. I mean, this must be everywhere. Right. It's Saudi. It's Israel. It's America. It's every it seems like it's everyone that there's like 12 hit men like at the local 7-Eleven nearest to her.

And they all run into each other like, wait, what are you... No, no, no, no. I have to. Please, honestly. And they all kind of know each other. They're like, if I don't do this, it will be so bad for me. Can you please let me do it? Just the idea. They're like, no, no, you do it, man. No, no, you do it. You got this one. The idea that there's so many henchmen waiting for the call to go handle Ghislaine Maxwell and the idea that they're all just waiting at the bottom of the hill like...

Maybe that's why nobody's got to her because they keep undercutting each other. Or the idea that like, wait, you're getting paid. Wait, you're getting paid what?

Wait, hold on, hold on. They're unionizing? Yeah. They keep preventing each other from following through because they're like, we can do better. Wait, hold on. He Venmo'd you how much? Oh, dude. Putin never pays. It never comes through. It comes through in like a Venmo and then it's like he's doing like layaway henchmen. I know. And you do not want all the henchmen from every country to collude down at the blimpy near Ghislaine Maxwell and they're all just like, ah, God. You got a per diem? God.

You go in like that, you better make it a murder-suicide, I'll tell you that. The idea that, like, Ghislaine is still alive because all the henchmen, like, ran into each other. And they're like, uh-uh, dude, not until you pay me what he's getting paid. Like, uh-uh, I'm not doing it. They're all like, you know, we should start our own business. Like, we should do our own thing. Yeah.

Like, why is that so funny to me? Or just the idea that they go in there. This woman, dude. I also think there's a way that, you know, like Frank Abagnale, the guy that, you know, catch me if you can. What they tend to do, maybe not at this level. They tend to go like, hey, let's negotiate with you.

We'll give you this many years if you help us. If you help us. Like, they might be going, all right, Ghislaine, we won't, like, you know, pull the toes off everyone you love if you tell us how Diddy did it. I just, I am on the edge of my seat. I'm just thinking about, like, what is her move? Every day is she waking up like...

like constantly angling i just maybe i'm so obsessed with uh what galene maxwell is doing in her cell because i'm i'm just like in a room like she just walk in circles like what does she do like i'm just like i'm like being in a cell really starts to make you go crazy i mean it's just i'm looking at that like sorry to have compassion for her because i've been in this method podcast i've been in this reno hotel room

for two days and I'm losing my mind. All right. Going to drive to Oakland right now. And then next weekend I'm, Oh, I'm coming to Tarrytown, New York and then Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Chattanooga, all the places. I love you guys. I've been responding to YouTube comments. So get in there. Let's do the damn thing. Also, we got information from the YouTube rep saying that

Most of the people that watch our podcast at this point are not subscribers. That's my favorite stat. I don't know what that means. It means people are hate watching you all day. Worked for Meghan Markle. I don't care. I don't care where the numbers come from. Numbers are numbers.

But that's so interesting to me, isn't it? But your subscriber count has gone. You've gained over 50,000 subscribers in the last four months. Here's what I'll say, though. I watch things all the time that I don't subscribe to because it just comes up in my thing and I just it gives it to me. I don't subscribe to literally my favorite podcast and my favorite YouTube channels. So it knows you're looking for it anyway. Guilty as charged. But to all you out there that won't put a ring on it.

You know what? You're my people. We started this podcast talking about I won't commit. I won't commit to a side. I won't commit to a team. I won't commit to a belief. I won't commit to a YouTube channel either. Good for you. Good for you. I'm with it. I did an auto order once on Amazon. I almost had a panic attack. I was like, I don't know who I'm going to be in a month. I don't know who I'm going to be in a month. I don't know if I'm going to still want this yerba mate tea next month. I'm going to be over it by then.

Okay. I switch toothpaste every month. I'm on the Sensodyne now. I don't do you, you guys do you. Um, all right. We are going to go drive to Oakland. Uh, wish us luck. I love you guys. Uh, don't ride elephants. See you in the comments.