Kanye Koercive Kontrol?
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Hello, hello and welcome to another episode of Telling Everybody Everything. My tour is in full swing. I was up north last weekend. Where am I this weekend? Leicester on Thursday, Worthing, Wolverhampton, Cardiff, and then Madrid. I can't tell you how much chaos was caused by my rescheduling of the Madrid date.

I received messages from people when I rescheduled the original Madrid show, and they were very disappointed to be refunded the price of their ticket. But when a show cancels, you don't get a refund for the hotel or the flight or all the extra plans that you made to attend the show. I felt absolutely terrible. I would never reschedule for illness.

I went on stage in Cork with absolutely no voice and squeaked my way through. You know me. I will be there. But it conflicted with Canada's Got Talent, and a decision greater than me was made that I needed to do Canada's Got Talent all of the dates. They couldn't move that. You can't move Shania Twain. I mean, you could easily move her. She's pocket-sized. Just pick her up. Anyone could do it. She could ride on the back of a goose. Adorable girl.

I had to do that, but I forgot that Madrid was put back in the diary for the coming Monday, February 10th, and I had scheduled other things. I have a brand new project coming out that I haven't spoken about yet, but it's going to be really fun. I was meant to do two episodes of that. I was meant to do a press day for At Home with Katherine Ryan, which is series two of our family reality show that's on UKNW, or you can stream it on YouTube.

You is like the new branding of UK TV, basically, where you would have watched the original Taskmaster or Meet the Richardsons or David Mitchell's The Outsiders. So many funny things on UK TV. I really think they are still at the forefront of making great comedy shows and television is going through a very interesting phase.

a period of evolution. So we are so lucky to have a second series of something on you, and I hope you love it. My friend Emily Dean did a little Q&A with me at the launch the other day. We did a screening for some esteemed members of Women in Film and TV, and she said it was like the Kardashians if it had been written by Nora Ephron.

And I loved that. It is a real insight into the family. We are not acting. Nothing is really produced. And I loved watching the screening. I cry in the show, which is not like me. But we know now that I was pregnant at the time, but I was concealing a pregnancy at the time. Like, I'm always concealing a fucking pregnancy at the time. But I guess that would contribute to why I felt human emotions. Very odd for me. I didn't think I could medically cry at this point.

I'm going to be looking for a refund on the Botox, but I can't wait for you to see it. So that's going to be on Mondays. You can watch it while I'm in Madrid. Suffering, because the show starts at 10 p.m. in Madrid, the live show. 10 p.m., which is UK 11 p.m., and I don't understand Spanish people. Like, I'm sorry. I'm not having a siesta where I live. I don't know who's coming to a 10 p.m. show on a Monday, but I can't wait to find out. God love you. Are you on cocaine? But if you're going to bed at a reasonable hour...

You can tuck yourself up in the UK. And yes, this is to the drag queen community and moms alike. You tuck yourself up at nine and you can watch At Home with Katherine Ryan on you. Or you can stream the whole box set from Monday at nine. And that's going to be really exciting. There are four episodes. It touches on like so many things. Bobby has his own episode. He's really funny this series. We talk about male fertility. We talk about Bobby's birth.

as a dad having lost his dad very young. We have an amazing marriage coach called Daisy Chihuoco and she is so cool and funny and she's holding a retreat soon actually which she asked me to advertise on my Instagram but I kind of

couldn't do it in all consciousness because a Daisy's and maybe this resonates with you. I love how open she is. I think she's the perfect person for the show. I follow her on Instagram. I really connect with and admire a lot of what she says. Also a Daisy has three kids, has been married like 20 years. So she knows a lot more than I do having been a wife for just five, but she's very open about there having been infidelity in her marriage and

And using that experience as a springboard to get better. And she says she has the marriage now that she's always loved and there will be a lot of people experiencing a setback like that, a disconnect in your marriage. And like, do you have to divorce after an event like that? Or can you move forward? And can you even become better?

And so on paper, I absolutely love what a daisy stands for. But in my heart of hearts, I want to have a fist fight with her husband, WWE style, maybe in a wrestling ring, MMA. I don't know. I'm crossed with him. A daisy's forgiven him. I've not. And I've never met the man. And I know that life is complicated and nuanced and nothing's black and white and marriage is ebb and flow. But I am seeing a few moms...

who have mysteriously found God after their husband cheats. And I hope that I articulate this the right way. I think these people were always, you know, they observed religion. But specifically, I know about five or six women now who this exact scenario has played out. Their husband has cheated, and then they have leaned into religion.

oh, this actually was so much better for us. We're so much stronger now. Like he's amazing now that I am in my role. I found God and God, God, God, God wants this for us. And I focus on myself and my own energy and I'm a better person. And so my husband respects me more and he's learned from his mistakes and we've turned it all over to God and he's an even better husband now. And I just feel like, okay, maybe, or...

If it were me, because these are also like really impressive, overachieving women too. They're not wallflower women. They are high performance, highly competent women who, for whom I think failure, whatever definition of failure you want to give it, failure for them would be an embarrassment or a setback. So I think these women specifically, they have similar personalities. They've been through the same thing and then they all find God. And I think it's because

For some of them, not all, because I'm not in their marriage, I don't know. But I think unless you can find a win from a bad situation, then what was your grief for? Unless you're able to reframe that experience and go, well, actually, we're even better now. And I am rewarded by God because I stuck around and I showed grace and my husband and I communicate better now and we've done this and we have overcome grief.

Him being an absolute dick and I take my responsibility and him being a dick as well. I couldn't do it. And that's maybe because I'm less of a woman than they are. I'm like not as smart or committed or certainly I'm not as religious. But I think if I had to get over an affair, no one has to, but if I chose to, I would probably store that resentment away and

deep, deep down where I have sort of filed everything that gives me autoimmune disease. And I would be resentful for a long time and I might be able to forgive, but never quite forget. And it would come out in different ways. And I think about it less, but I'd still think about it. I mean, I'm able to really hold on and get revenge. Like I'll get my revenge 10 years later, 20 years later, 30 years later, 50 years later, watch out for me.

Maybe that's what these women are doing. Maybe these women are the true geniuses. They're like, our marriage is stronger than ever and I've found God. And then just like slowly poisoning his Weetabix. I hope so. A marriage that is the most Googled marriage in the world right now that really baffles me is the one between Bianca Sensori and Kanye Yeezy West. Kanye West could be many things.

Does he have personality disorder? Is he an anti-Semitic? Is he mentally unwell? Is he maybe on the brink of being sectioned? Has he struggled with his identity and his relationships and control? And I don't know. I don't know. He's a genius. I think he's a genius. I love, I love some of the music that he's created. He's certainly born to be a performer, but he's a very complicated man.

And we will never know the ins and outs of exactly what Kim Kardashian experienced in that marriage. Similarly, we won't know how difficult it is to be Kanye West in a music industry that we now know through loads of legal documents is a little bit sick, was probably trying to control him.

I don't know if an Illuminati exists, but certainly if it exists, then someone of the Kardashian echelon and Kanye West would be very much exposed to it, be in the mix, see things, know things, hide things. Certainly when Kanye West was politically vocal about his support for Donald Trump,

That became a problem for him, for his career. I think at the time he communicated fearing for his actual safety, but he persists. He is an outlier and he speaks his mind and whatever else is going on with him, I respect him for that. Do I think that Kanye West is a partner that I would want to hitch my wagon to? In many ways, maybe I would. He gifted Kim Kardashian like $3 million in Burger King shares one anniversary. I could use that.

But at what cost? All I know is that when it comes to relationships, Kanye West seems to have always had at least a physical type. He dated Amber Rose for a while, who dressed in a very Kanye aesthetic. And then we saw on the Kardashians show that...

that he completely revamped Kim Kardashian's wardrobe. She spoke about wanting to be more fashionable, not embarrassing him. He, in a very, I mean, it can be loving, but it also is definitely controlling way, completely cleared out her closet and filled it with the clothes that he thought that she should be presented in. And he meticulously curated her wardrobe. And both of them had admitted that many times. Kanye would always pick her outfits, criticize her outfits,

tweak and tailor her outfits. That was all Kanye's vision. He is not someone who wants anyone to deviate from his vision. I remember once on the show, he was crossed with Kim because she got him a peach flesh colored traditional bandaid instead of a new dark chestnut brown bandaid created for people with black skin.

he got mad about that fair enough but he got crazy mad about that like it meant that she didn't love him because his band-aid didn't match his arm all right so now he's dating bianca he dated amber oh not amber julia fox whom i love in the middle and she would turn up dressed in the kanye aesthetic though he couldn't box her in for long because she is also a creative genius

Now Kanye is dating Bianca Sensori, who has a history throughout their entire marriage of turning up basically naked to events, parties. She's got maybe the best body I've seen in my life, the most traditionally sexy, youthful kind of body that I would want. And when I say youthful, I mean like 29. She looks great.

And people have seen the recent red carpet pics of Bianca essentially totally nude at the Grammys. Now, this is a step beyond the way that she had dressed before. Kanye's fully clothed in black, totally covered from like neck to foot. And he just stands beside Bianca, who removes a fur coat to show that she's wearing a completely sheer dress.

flesh colored mini dress. You can see absolutely everything through it. It's like saran wrap, though not that tight. I mean, I thought it was, I personally thought she looked great, but you could see her nipples. You could see like her badge. You could see her little bum crack. Looked great. And what an interesting look.

way to dress like I'm wearing a dress but I'm absolutely not wearing a dress I like for someone to just go out and do it because all the other ones at the Met Gala or at the Grammys as well or wherever else some of them choose haute couture and it'll be a very interesting dress but a lot of them basically just have their nipples and like vag slightly covered and in a way I feel like

isn't this an interesting statement, an interesting fashion statement to be like, here's all of it. Then these are my nipples. How's that different from not my nipples? I don't know. At first glance, I thought, okay, like this is what they're doing. And there's clearly a sales pitch involved. This is a purposeful and some it's going to have to do with some type of hype surrounding something. And sure enough,

it broke the internet everyone's googling these photos they want to see these photos um it was more searched than Grammy winners or Grammy nominees or any other Grammy red carpet look even though Kanye wasn't nominated for anything he and Bianca just did the carpet and immediately got back into their cars it was reported that they were ejected but I think it's later emerged they weren't he never wanted to go to the Grammys he just wanted to get that red carpet photo and leave

I think he also might have tried to get a photo with Taylor Swift as well, according to Violet, but her management declined. And today, Kanye has released this bodysuit modeled by his wife, Bianca, that is very sheer, obviously covers more than the Grammy dress, and it's for sale for like $20. And now a lot of people will buy that. So, okay, he's selling his wares. That's what he's doing.

But the feminists are raging. There are people who say this is coercive control. Bianca blinked twice if you're in trouble. She's in a relationship with a narcissist. He's parading her around like an object. He curates what she wears. It's like a humiliation kink. Even my own sister said, I think at this point it's a humiliation kink. He wants to strut her out naked in front of all these people, even though

The way her body looks is not humiliating at all. But you know what I mean? Like, there are a lot of people who have some feelings about this. And I understand where those feelings come from. Kanye West, as I mentioned, has a history of mental illness and narcissism and relationships where he has been described as being controlling. But I feel like we are filling in a lot of blanks. We don't have enough information to take it to the level where we're prepared to call him in

coercive and liberate Bianca from what we think might be a coercive controlling relationship. Like that's against the law now. So it's very serious. I don't know why we never hear from this woman. That's probably a red flag as well. But did you see these pics? What do you think is going on? Because I'm honestly stumped. I was talking about it with Bobby in the kitchen today and he...

is more on the side of, well, Kanye is a creative genius. He's a stunt queen. He's doing this for attention and his wife might be in on it. But also, yeah, she might be in trouble. I don't know. I can't tell. I am from a toxic generation. I think I am blinded by how great she looks. Because if she were a woman with maybe a different, less traditionally applauded body type who just walked out on the red carpet like that alone, would people say, oh, that's empowering?

She's so brave. Like there was a year of my life, probably when I turned 40, when I started wearing a bikini and I was called brave rather than sexy. That is a transition for all of us. But because Kanye stood next to her looking, you know, very clothed and masculine and serious, then the context changes. It's reframed for people. And now I don't know what to think.

Please let me know. Is Bianca Sensori in trouble? Does she need us to get in a Winnebago, go over there with some track pants? Or is she laughing all the way to the bank? Are there motives for her attached to this? Does she want to go on the red carpet, totally naked for the Grammys? What do you think? Telling everybody everything at gmail.com. I would love to hear your thoughts.

Oh, my phone died. You need a new one. On Verizon, we can save on the Samsung Galaxy S25 Plus with Galaxy AI. Really? You can also save with Verizon, right?

Bye.

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Ranger for the ones who get it done. A few weeks back, I spoke of Rat Boy Summer. Rat Boy, the year of the rat. I don't know what it was, but all of these celebrity men who the public decided sort of had mousy features.

were kind of the hottest guys and they were in all of the magazines and we declared it a trend. What is the next trend? I had to think about it in January 2025. What is it going to be? And I think I have the answer. Ladies, it's the year of the chin.

Plastic surgeons around the world are finding themselves inundated with requests for state-of-the-art chin implants and jawline contouring by men who are no longer content to accept the cherubic heart-shaped bone structure, or indeed, lack of chin, rat boy structure that God gave them. The consensus end product is being described by the Chinorati as the Disney prince or Superman aesthetic.

And I have to be honest and tell you that I know men in my own life who were having jawline filler five years ago and calling it the Superman aesthetic. So this was creeping up for a long time. And I think it's just gone mainstream now.

The top requested celebrity lower thirds are Chris Hemsworth, Ryan Gosling, I don't even think has a strong jawline, so that confuses me, David Beckham and Cristiano Ronaldo, all of whom have especially snatched jawlines. Do you know what though? I knew, I didn't know Ryan Gosling personally, but he was on a Canadian show called Breaker High. He's a Canadian entertainer. He was in the Mickey Mouse Club. He's been around as long as Justin Timberlake and Britney and all the rest.

Maybe I'm remembering his child prepubescent jawline and thinking that he doesn't have a snatched jawline now. Or maybe he's already had this, well, it's not surgery if it's filler. It's surgery if it's an implant, but it's just filler, the same as you get your lips done if it's not. Ryan Gosling before, after. I just can't even picture his jawline. Oh, no, he's always had like a jawline. I don't know.

I would not call Ryan Gosling's jawline a Superman jawline, but equally I think he's just grown up. I don't think he's had work done looking at these before and after pics. I just have issues and I remember him as a kid.

Well, that's solved. The biggest name in the artificial chin game at the moment is Chicago-based doctor Benjamin Coughlin, whose trademark procedures like the Chicago, which is buccal fat pad sculpting combined with jawline contouring. So that would be like lipo,

and removal of the fat below your cheekbones. And the, quote, face BBL, which moves fat from one part of the face to the other. Well, okay, look, a lot of surgeons for a lot of years have been moving fat from one place to the other. It doesn't mean that you need to call it the face BBL. What a horrible... He's trademarked this?

No, the face BBL, the face Brazilian butt lift, unnecessary. Just explain to your patients, so many surgeons are doing this, that with age, we lose volume and we lose skin elasticity. And people try to put the volume back with filler, but it never looks quite natural because you're never putting it back where it used to be. And since the beginning of time, using your own fat and doing little micro grafts

all throughout, you know, trying to get it in the place it used to be will restore that. And that is a surgery as old as time. But apparently this guy does it really well.

According to Coughlin, 41% of his patients are male these days, with the going rate for a chin implant being a cool $12,000. It's a cracking trade. Chin implants are relatively simple, typically lasting under an hour to do and only requiring local anesthesia and a week's recovery time. Oh, so you're not even asleep for a chin implant. I guess they would just make a little nick under here and like separate your skin from your bone and slide an implant in.

Cute. Oh, the silicone implant is roughly the size of forming a C with your thumb and index finger, and it is inserted by a discreet incision under the chin. Yeah. And according to Coughlin, it's not like breast implants where you have to get those redone. Recipients of chin implants go to the grave with this. Who's alleged, alleged, alleged, we cannot stress enough, alleged to be smuggling silicone in their jawlines? Zac Efron, alleged.

John Mulaney alleged Tom Brady, Donald Trump Jr. and Matt Rife allegedly, who Dr. Coughlin got into hot water with last year when he publicly took credit for the crowd work connoisseur's suddenly boxy mandible. Although his lawyers have advised he no longer comment on Rife, he offers that the biggest tell that a man has had a chin implant is he's recently grown a beard to hide the incision lines or suddenly developed a lisp.

but for the guys out there who don't have an extra 12 grand lying around don't fret as per always there's a social media trend for that mewing is a tongue exercise that supposedly strengthens the jawline and that's available free of charged charge and you know men have been cheating the jawline for a number of years a beard is so good for that if you can if you have a weak jawline and i will agree i think a strong jawline is very attractive on a man it's really masculine

Um, it looks hot. And I know that there have been men with beards for a number of years and they decide to shave it and all of a sudden, jump scare. These men actually have no jawline and they're ugly. Grow it back. Grow the beard back. We are looking at a Gaston chin spring, y'all. I tried to do this actually when I wanted a jawline like Kylie Jenner.

Because you just can't deviate that much from what God gave you. I got filler in my jawline. This would have been kind of 2016, 17, maybe a long time ago. And it just didn't look natural on me. And then the filler eventually, gravity takes hold and it sinks a little bit. So luckily that's pretty much gone, except I do have a little bit of it on one side that kind of sounds like sand is stuck under my skin if I push it and move it around.

So I would not advise a woman or anyone presenting as female to get jawline filler because it's just not for us. But I have seen the chin looks good. I think a chin implant is probably safer and more long lasting. Yes, it's more expensive, but it's the route that I would go instead of filler because it is permanent and it's not going to fall off.

Talk about making ageist lemons into comedic lemonade. During a recent American chat show appearance, 43-year-old Amy Schumer, who has her brand new show coming out on Netflix like this week, it's called Almost Pregnant or Kind of Pregnant, she revealed that she ran into actor Bradley Cooper and their small talk took a very bizarre turn. He said, you know, I turned 50 this year. And then he went on to say, you 50? Yeah.

Amy said that she tried to recover from Bradley's painfully awkward question. She said, because I'm 43, but you know, I'm like, I will be 50, but I'm not. But thank you for thinking of me. Well, I think Bradley Cooper allegedly has lost all sense of space and time. He has maybe had some help in looking young and fresh. And in Hollywood, how do you know how old anyone is? I probably wouldn't be...

so insensitive as to ask any woman, are you 50? Not that I think being 50 is an insult, but an actor should know that a lot of these women, thankfully not Amy Schumer, a lot of these women are very sensitive and they're 150, but they've got like four-year-old tits and a new facelift and they've just been lipoed beyond an inch of their lives and they're panting in anticipation of their next Ozempic hit. You know, they're not well.

So using language like that around Hollywood, you 50 brave. And Bradley Cooper, who's he dating now? I mean, all that I know about him is he dates very young women. Bradley Cooper girlfriends.

His dating history. Here we go. Oh, no, he's dated a few that are, but maybe he dated them a long time ago. Jennifer Esposito. They, she looked young. They were together in like 2006. It doesn't say their ages. Cameron Diaz, but this is a young Cameron Diaz, rumored to have dated her in 2007, not substantiated. Renee Zellweger.

all the way back in 2009 but he wasn't like super famous olivia wilde was young jennifer lopez rumored zoe saldana hot suki waterhouse gorgeous i don't know oh she was 23. and he was 40. yeah so like bradley cooper is going up to any woman he doesn't fancy i mean like you 50 i don't understand why my dick's not hard you 50

Not that I think he's a bad guy. He dated Russian supermodel Irina Shayk in 2015. And Amy Schumer had a great joke about that, actually. I don't know how the fuck old she was. Looked young. Diana Agron from Pitch Perfect. These are all rumored. Who's he dating now? Shishi Hadid? No way. They got into the same SUV in 2023. That could have been a carpool. Who knows? Look. Look.

Don't ever ask a woman if she's 50, even if, like me, you don't believe 50 is an insult. Bradley Cooper is very lucky to come away from that interaction unscathed. Oh, my phone died. You need a new one. On Verizon, we can save on the Samsung Galaxy S25 Plus with Galaxy AI. Really? You can also save on Verizon, right?

We'll see you next time.

If you're a facilities manager at a university, you know students rely on the cafeteria for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the occasional late night snack. So when a dishwasher breaks down and dirty plates pile up, the mess hall can turn messy in the blink of an eye. Enter Grainger. With over a million industrial grade products and fast delivery, the product you need now is never far away. So you can turn that dishwasher back into a lean, clean washing machine. Call

Click ranger.com or just stop by. Ranger, for the ones who get it done. Be careful of your tweets. Be careful of your tweets. I find that sometimes people who aren't comedians, or even comedians, but it's more likely to be non-comedians, they are given social media platforms now where they feel pressure to be funny, and instead of being funny, they'll say something that's just offensive.

And I was guilty of this at the start of my career. If I couldn't think of the right joke, I would just say something shocking and then nervous laughter became good enough. Like, oh, that's kind of like laughter. All right. But I wouldn't stand behind some of these jokes that I was trying to make back then. I don't think I've ever tweeted anything offensive. Certainly I've never tweeted anything like this. But let this be a lesson, especially to the young people.

When you're putting something on TikTok, when you're putting something on Snapchat, stories, whatever, you think it can't be screened, you just never know. You have to behave on social media very diplomatically because not two weeks later,

After Carla Sofia Gascon made her story as the first openly trans actor nominated for an acting Oscar and BAFTA for her titular role in Emilia Perez, some old tweets have come back to haunt her like a horde of zombies. Oh, no. The vast majority of them are relatively recent xenophobic remarks about Muslims with some strays reserved for George Floyd and even diversity at the Oscars. Oh, no.

the very ceremony handing out the very award she's hoping to covet or at least was hoping to covet in a matter of weeks so i don't even think i can read a lot of these tweets here's an example i'm sorry is it just my impression or are there more muslims in spain every time i go to pick my daughter up from school there are more women with their hair covered and skirts down to their heels next year instead of english we'll have to teach arabic i'm not going to read the next one oh uh

Uh, ooh. More and more, the hashtag Oscars, she even hashtagged it so people searching for the Oscars could find this tweet, are looking like a ceremony for independent and protest films. I didn't know if I was watching an Afro-Korean festival, a Black Lives Matter demonstration, or the 8M. Apart from that, an ugly, ugly gala. The Chinese vaccine, apart from the mandatory chip, comes with two spring rolls. Oh, no, no, no, I'm not going to.

Okay, so suffice to say, these are not tweets that you or I would probably make, let alone be proud of. But these are pretty recent. Like, this is not a 13-year-old getting lost in the game. Oh, no. No, no, this is not how Hollywood works.

With Oscar and BAFTA voting well underway, it's common wisdom that Gascon's hopes of a dark horse upset in Best Actress are now dashed, and everyone involved in 2025's most nominated film is on edge to see if they are guilty by association. Fingers are being pointed fast and furiously at Netflix for not duly vetting the social media of Gascon, who's known to be a heifer in a china shop when it comes to speaking her mind.

The price of vetting a nominee's social media history and scrubbing offensive posts is minuscule compared to the cost of courting Oscar voters through tastemaker screenings, four-year consideration ads, and lavish parties. A full court press, whoa, can cost up to $30 million, say sources familiar with campaign spending. The cost of vetting, by contrast, runs $5,000 to $20,000, depending on how prolific a contender is on social media.

So I don't think a lot of listeners will know this. This is what happens. So for a job in a sales office or a car dealership or on a movie, your employers will look at your social media because it is relevant. And I would agree that, you know, love Netflix. And Netflix is a home of free speech and a home of comedy. And they really mean not to...

uh thought police anyone but you do have a duty of care to look for these things because you are putting everyone in your cast and crew at risk of having their work compromised for the words and actions of someone else so i mean i do get it where do you draw the line that's the trouble you know would you look at jimmy carr's jokes and be like oh well you can't say that and be on netflix but these aren't jokes this is like just some but is this person trying to tell a joke

Hmm. Okay. And I also don't think people know because Violet was very disappointed that Taylor Swift did not win any of the six Grammys she was nominated for. I was surprised actually, because how's anyone winning a Grammy above Taylor Swift? She's definitely sold the most tour tickets, had the most album sales. Her album is critically acclaimed. I kind of don't understand how it works, but I am seeing that.

that awards, I've always thought from the start, are a little bit silly, are quite a popularity contest. But there is campaigning that goes on. There will be a whole PR team taking out ads in the paper being like, please vote for so-and-so, sending so-and-so to the right red carpets and doing the right PR moves so that whomever decides will put them forward. You're not going to win an Oscar, right?

Or a BAFTA. Or, well, maybe a BAFTA. I don't see it as, like, grotesque in this country as it is in Hollywood. But you're not going to make a movie and then sit at home for a year and win that award. You do have to schmooze and talk to the right people and remind them to vote for you. And...

A lot of these votes come from your peers. So you got to be out there like a presidential campaign. Loads of money goes into a presidential campaign. Loads of funding also goes into a very calculated Oscar campaign. So this is just really sad. Okay, she has issued an apology. I'm deeply sorry to those for whom I have caused pain. I want to acknowledge the conversation around my past social media posts that have caused hurt.

It's... I don't think what she did would qualify as hate speech. I don't think she incited violence against anyone. I would like to give people the benefit of the doubt and think she was like trying to be edgy and make a joke.

But she has chosen to be in this industry that is a popularity contest. You do have to participate in like saying what everybody else is saying and believing what everybody else is believing and like going with the flow of Hollywood because that's what Hollywood has always been about. It's not a normal place.

I mean, we're talking about you winning an Oscar. It's not like you're being arrested, being like, hey, hey, free speech. It's like, would you like this Oscar? Well, then you do have to kind of behave like perfectly if you want to win an Oscar. No one's talking about canceling this woman or not giving her another role. I don't understand it. And that's why I live here. Oh, hell to the hell to the hell to the no. I feel sick reading this letter from a listener who says,

Her period app data collection had gone wrong. Of course, when I see this, I'm like, oh, God, what has happened? Like, are you in an anti-abortion state in America where the government has tapped into your data and they have...

sussed that you're pregnant and no, it's actually much worse than that. "Katherine, sometimes my period tracker asks me to answer little quizzes. It's for research on the female body, so of course I oblige. Last night, I was blindly answering one of their quizzes about my sex life with my newish partner.

He does satisfy my needs, but I answered a bunch of questions basically admitting that our libidos don't quite match up. And due to stress with his career, he doesn't seem to want it as often as I do. I finished the quiz. And then, to my horror, I read a message saying my answers were sent to my partner. I didn't realize that's what I was doing when I started the quiz. It gets much worse. It gets so much worse, you wouldn't believe it.

Here's the extra catch. We've only been dating five months. The answers to my quiz were sent to my ex-boyfriend, whom I had connected to my period app from before. I'm so embarrassed. I'm hoping my ex has deleted his app and that he just doesn't get the answers to my quiz. Do I call him to apologize or explain? Or do I just cross my fingers that he never sees my embarrassing answers? You need to move. You need to, uh,

burn your house down and move. Don't worry. I would expect that if your ex receives to his inbox the results from like your period app quiz, like hopefully it comes up very period and he knows that it's about all of that and he won't be interested in it. I would guess that he's never going to think, oh, let me open this. It's probably about her sex life with her current partner. And

Never call him. Never call him. Don't call him for any reason in the world. That was wild. You're really spiraling to even think that way. But if he does confront you in any way or you think he's read it, just say that you were answering about him.

Just be like, oh, I'm so like that is an old data thing. I don't know. I deleted my app. Yes, I deleted my app. And then when I redownloaded it because I'm with a new partner who satisfies me tremendously in the bedroom, not like you did. Just be like, oh, it popped up. It resent my last quiz from when we were together. I'm really sorry about that.

Don't admit that you have a higher libido than your new partner or you're not having sex as much as you want or he's stressed with his job. You got to lie. And hopefully you could just be British about this and neither of you will ever speak about this again or have contact. I think you're reading, you're imagining that men are a lot more intuitive than they are. I don't think he's going to read the quiz. So hopefully you should be okay. But never call him a

Oh no, Catherine, is my teen being love bombed? I've got a dilemma. My son is 18. In December, he started dating a guy a year older than he is. Within two weeks of talking to each other, they were officially together, which I thought was really sweet. Days after there, huh?

Hard launch. It was Christmas Day, and my son's boyfriend had bought him an all-inclusive week holiday to Greece this spring. He told my son he spent over 2,000 pounds on his present. My son had spent 50 quid on him for Christmas, which I thought was about right. Immediate red flag, is this new boyfriend telling him how much it costs? I think that's tacky. But maybe when you're 19...

Tacky doesn't exist yet. I'm not sure, but I would never be like, here's the gift and it cost me two grand. I would never say that. The boyfriend's now constantly driving my son everywhere, insisting he wants to constantly buying him clothes and showering him with gifts within less than a week of being together had told him he loves him.

My worry is that this is classic love bombing. I've been in a very bad relationship like this. It was good at the start and then it ended very badly. I don't know if I'm just worrying because of my own experiences, but I don't want my son to end up in a controlling relationship.

His boyfriend seems so lovely, so it may be totally innocent, but in my head, it's ringing alarm bells. I've not said anything to my son about it, but I think maybe I need to have a conversation with him. I don't want to push him away or cause unnecessary drama.

yeah, this is a worry because your son is 18. He's an adult. He's going to make his own decisions. And the more you lean in like this, he's going to back away. And that's the last thing we want with our children. So remember, even though he's a gay man, he's still a man. So I wouldn't overthink it. I imagine...

that you could tell your son about your relationship if he doesn't know already. He could be like, oh, you know, I'm so happy for you that you are really fulfilled in this new relationship and it sounds so exciting to go to Greece. And you found a man who treats you really well and is doting on you and wants to give you gifts and do lots of things for you. Like, that's amazing. I wish my relationship like that was just out of goodwill. But actually, when I was your age, I got into a relationship with someone who was doing that

to love bomb me and control me. You know what love bombing is? And I'm sure an 18 year old does. And just be like, here are some signs to watch out for. Oh, maybe not even that. I don't want to spook this son.

Just be like, I wish I had been aware while I was enjoying the love bombing to watch out for signs like isolating me from my friends and family and like trying to change things about me or being aggressive or pushing my boundaries to make me uncomfortable. Like, I wish I had been aware of stuff like that, which the younger generation, you guys are so smart. You know, you know what to watch out for. But I didn't like just plant the seed in his head.

And I think it should be okay because with the evidence you have now, you just don't know if it's going to go south or not. I think that all we can do is arm our children with knowing about the red flags and having the language to describe that, to identify it and move away from it if it becomes toxic. I love that your boyfriend or your boyfriend, your son has this boyfriend. I hope it goes well. And he is just like rich and goes on holidays everywhere.

That's the life I wanted when I was 18. Where was this boy when I was 18, this 19-year-old? Oh, yes, not born and about to be gay. Potential cervical cancer from HPV. Give the deceived a heads up. Who's been deceived? Catherine, I'm listening to your latest podcast about the torn-up letter meant for the neighbors. Oh, all right.

Right. I mean, I think this is a reach. I know what you're talking about. So a few weeks ago, a young woman received a letter that her dogs had allegedly torn up so she could read it. And it was meant for the neighbor. And it was someone trying to warn her neighbor that the wife was sleeping around. And if you're going to talk about each. OK, let's see.

My opinion, your opinion has constantly been don't get involved. It's none of my business. I have to say this from personal experience. I strongly disagree. I love a disagreement. Bring it on. I was two and a half years into my first relationship with a guy whom I thought was 100% loyal to me. Never even an inkling that he would stray. I later found out that he had been sleeping with seven other women.

I went straight to the clinic and I found that he'd given me HPV and that it needed immediate attention. I had Macmillan leaflets posted through my door the next day and was given a date at the hospital to have my cervix cauterized. This is a hot wire loop that burns out the affected precancerous area. It was horrific. I could smell my own flesh burning and sweat so much from the pain. And yes, they had already injected the area inside with anesthetic, but I could still feel it. After this procedure, oh, and by the way,

If you have this loop excision that I've read about too, then I think, and I might be wrong, I think you do have to be monitored in your pregnancies. You might need a cervical stitch depending on how much of the cervix they have to remove because the integrity of your closed cervix could be in jeopardy after that. So it is very serious. I agree. After this procedure, I had to go back for a checkup. It was not all gone. So they cut it out again. Then a third time, six months later, Jesus Christ.

I had not found out about his cheating. Had I not found out, I would have been well on my way to cervical cancer being none the wiser. And so after I dumped him and found my own place and settled back into my single life rhythm, I had classmates tell me. Turned out the whole town knew he was cheating on me because he'd been doing it the entire time we were together, including with the mother of his son.

I tell you, Catherine, I was more furious that no one told me and I could have cut it off and run before catching his nasty fucking virus that has caused me so much pain and sleepless nights. Cheaters always get caught, but it's the damage they cause in the meantime while others stay silent. Everyone in the town knew. I mean, I'm really surprised that you didn't have a close enough like friend or family member or confidant who would tell you,

Because I'm thinking like this is a neighbor in my letter and before when I talk about cheating and what to do. These people are removed from the victim. Like they don't know the victim at all. And why would they be believed by the woman being cheated on? Because in many cases, the messenger gets shot. This woman is in a situation where she kind of knows, but she's choosing to turn the blind eye. She's choosing to believe her husband or husband.

take on, you know, the pretense of believing her husband. And in that case, I think it goes wrong. But if you had this boyfriend whom everyone knew about, like if it was my best friend or someone I really knew well enough to deliver that information, I absolutely would. And that's the difference for me. And yes, exposing you to a variety of STIs like is very dangerous. And I wonder if there's any follow up like

If he should be reprimanded for that or if the HPV can even be traced back to him, though obviously you know he gave it to you. I think when people cheat, maybe they don't consider like the real damage to their loved ones that they could be doing fully. And your story is really important and I'm so sorry that happened to you. I think it's, I love that you've disagreed. I think it's down to every listener to judge like your relationship with the person that you intend to tell and how that's gonna go.

If it's someone's random wife and you don't know her and she's likely to disbelieve you, then that's when I don't think you should stick your neck out. But if it can save someone cervical cancer and she might believe you. This is why, like regardless of your husband cheating or not, we all need to go for our regular smears. Please. Mine, my next one's in April. And by the way, Bobby did give me HPV when we got together and it sucked. Gone now. After 20 years, my husband is disgusting. We'll end on this.

Catherine, been married to my husband for 20 years. He used to make an effort to be gentlemanly, but in recent years he can't be bothered. I constantly ask him politely to be less openly gross, but he doesn't act on it. I'm frustrated. Should I abandon all decorum and do just as he does? Fart openly? Leave the bathroom door open? Pick my teeth? Clear my throat constantly? Burp without excusing myself? Dry my genitals and arse with a towel in the bedroom?

I could go on. Should I mirror his activities so he can see how challenging it is to remain attracted to him when he does these things or just continue nagging? I would love to know your thoughts. It's hurtful that you have voiced your disgust about your husband's behavior and he's made no effort to change. That would hurt my feelings because like Charlotte,

York Goldenblatt said in an early episode of Sex and the City, it's the end of romance. And I think that you deserve to be romanced even in your marriage of 20 years. Does your husband fully appreciate how much this is turning you off? Because you said you've tried to politely tell him, but maybe it is time to be less polite. To say, I love you and you are exploiting that because I don't think you would appreciate it if I was doing A, B, and C.

And it would be romantic if you could keep some of that behavior private. I would be more attracted to you. Some of the benefits to you might be more intimacy from me, a happier wife slash happier life. And if you choose not to comply, then I'm going to give you a taste of your own medicine and start doing the same and see how long it takes for you not to be attracted to me. I don't like it. I take care to like be somewhat of a lady around you.

You could be a gentleman for me, or I'm going to find someone else who will. And if that doesn't work, just go cold. I think we spend a lot of time talking to men past the close. They know what you have requested. They know what they've done wrong. All the energy that you're putting into this husband to ask him to change, redirect and reclaim that energy back into yourself. Go out with your girlfriends.

Do something for you. Get a facial, have a massage, go shopping. Quietly watch what you want to watch in your own room without telling him goodnight. Just live your best energetic life and see if he notices the withdrawal of energy from him. And he will come and he will find you. He'll be like, where did you go? Why aren't you talking to me? It's not about stonewalling. You talk to him, but just not as much as before. Be like, oh, I redirected the energy I was putting into you back to myself because...

You don't shut the door when you're taking a dump. Thank you for listening to another episode of Telling Everybody Everything. Please look after each other. If you ever want to write me a letter, it is tellingeverybodyeverything at GL.com.

Bye.

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