My Boyfriend Has Two Girlfriends...And A WIFE
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Hello, hello, and welcome to another episode of Telling Everybody Everything. It has been a week since my last episode because I've done a few extra tour dates this weekend, and thank you to those who came. I'm off now for a week until February 20th. 20th? I'm going to be back on the 20th in Doncaster, then Nottingham, then Sheffield, and then Colchester, Brighton, Plymouth, and then...

London. I'm doing some dates at the Palladium in March and in April. I can tell you some celebrity guests will be going to those ones, including but not limited to Big Nasty's mother. A lot of my friends and just different comedians and industry people tend to come to the London Palladium dates because for them the tickets are free, but also because going to the Palladium is just a good night out.

You can do dinner in Soho or around there beforehand. The show timings as ever are 8 p.m. sharp. Then there's an interval at 10 to 9 and you are out of there by 945. I think the first few dates of the Palladium are sold out and then the next few dates are not. And I hope they do because they want to add some more dates. And I'm like, guys, this is really such a great idea because how humiliating would it be to do shows at the Palladium all by yourself?

The last show that I did on Monday evening was in Madrid at 10 p.m., 10 p.m. And I didn't even check that timing because, as I said, 8 p.m. starred, but in Madrid, 10. And then I asked people, like, why is it 10? Is that a mistake? Why is it 10? And the answer always came back the same, Spanish, like apparently Spanish people are

They open their shops from like 10 to 2 and then they have a siesta and then they open it back up again from like 4 till 8 so people don't get home till 9. They have dinner. It's not completely the done thing on a Monday maybe, but it is quite normal to go to a show at 9 or 10.

But it was so much fun and I so appreciate a lot of British expats who came to the show and there were some Spanish locals as well and we learned a lot and I just loved it. If you are a single man listening to this podcast, Annie is not interested because she's just so busy always touring around doing events, but she is the most eligible bachelorette in the land.

She is funny. She's blonde. She's beautiful. She works with TV's Catherine Ryan. She works with Chris Martin of Coldplay. She works with K-pop bands. She's worked with the Queen of England at the Olympic ceremony. Like Annie's the one who can just solve any problem anytime, anywhere. And Annie gives me a small insight into what it would be like to be her husband because she just looks after me.

so impeccably. She's always thinking about like packing some extra apples and peanut butter or a boiled egg that I might need. And okay, my demands are not high, but she'll have like what sits in the car and she'll pack me like tiny gin and tonics to have if it's been a hectic day and I want to drink one responsibly. Um, and she's organizes all the flights and a lot of tour managers don't do the scope of things that Annie does. She does all the tech. She's

She navigates all the production tickets that we need to have. She liaises with the venue. Her skills are limitless. And a woman like fucking that is single in the United Kingdom? I just don't believe it. It's because, you know, why would she bring herself down? But the right man...

who could enhance Annie's quality of life, I feel, could be just around the corner. Not that you need to be in a relationship. You don't need to, but it's nice sometimes. And it's probably hard for Annie to date because I'm always standing in the way. My needs. I mean, here I am. I'm the one keeping Annie single because I'm like, Annie, I forgot my shoes. But she is an absolute legend and she does all the driving. She can park anywhere. It's very sexy.

We were in Worthing and then Wolverhampton and then Cardiff. I might be missing a place in the middle. But then we drove from Cardiff to London and then straight up again in the morning we went to the airport and flew to Madrid. And then we did the show in Madrid like three hours after landing and then we woke up in the morning at 7 a.m. and flew back to the U.K. So like...

It's a whirlwind. It's fun. So that means I was unable to watch the Super Bowl while I was in Cardiff. I mean, I guess I could have stayed up and watched it. Did any of you? Swifties. Keep a lookout for T-Swizz. We know all the Chiefs players now. There are a lot of famous ones in their own right. Obviously, Travis Kelsey.

Obviously, Patrick Mahomes. Obviously, that time-traveling pussyhole homophobe Harrison Butker, who didn't even get to play. And I was actually rooting for the Chiefs to win, even though Bobby's team did not make the Super Bowl. They're the Pittsburgh Steelers. According to him, they played very badly this year.

It's stressful, but the Chiefs played the Eagles. I know people who support the Eagles. Violet tells me Taylor Swift has even been pictured in past years wearing an Eagles jersey. She has a song lyric about an Eagles jersey because she's from Pennsylvania, not far from Philadelphia. Anyway,

The Chiefs, as you all know by now, did not win. Not only did they lose, but they were quite badly beaten. And I just, I mean, I, okay, sports, this is the trouble of sports. There's always going to be grown men crying. And for that reason, I love it. No, I don't like it. It makes me feel sad that anyone is that invested in throwing a ball and it has that much impact on your future and your career and you put months and years and an entire lifetime of work

into this moment. And it really can go either way. And I loved, I just love Patrick Mahomes and his family so much. I feel like in the future, if anything happens in that marriage and he becomes like a bitter retired athlete who for some reason is unfaithful out of boredom or distraction or a dopamine slump,

I'm going to be personally hurt by that because right now he just seems like he's got all his ducks in a row and this is what makes him a success. He prioritizes God. Whatever you think about religion, it's keeping him on a righteous path.

He prioritizes his wife, who's his best friend from very young, and she's an athlete. They have very similar interests. I think they play their family roles very well. They respect each other. He seems to lift her up, and she goes to all of his games, even like eight days after she's just had a baby. She's there in her bespoke chief's outfit. And he works out, and he seems to have real focus, laser focus. A man like that knows, oh, if I start...

taking drugs in a brothel on my day off or carrying on text messaging strange women and getting distracted. It's going to affect every part of my life. People won't respect me. Brands will pull out of deals with me. My fans will be let down. My performance on the field won't be as strong. My teammates will be betrayed. This is the attitude that I don't understand why more professional athletes are lacking because to me it seems very clear.

So long live the Mahomes. I love, it was so sweet actually. He posted onto Instagram when they lost, like, I let you guys down, which broke my heart. He's only a little boy to me. What is he like 30? He goes, I let you guys down. I tried my hardest and I'm going to come back strong and keep fighting for the win next time. And I am grateful for every opportunity God has given me.

But it seems obviously that he felt he squandered this opportunity. He didn't play his best, but you did play your best, Patrick. And the Chiefs, I think, and maybe I just see the Chiefs more than I see other teams because of all the press interest surrounding the Swift-Kelsey relation. But they have stepped up their fashion and really changed things.

how people watch football pregame. I was never interested in watching players come off a plane or come off a bus with all their Louis Vuitton luggage to see what they were wearing. But it has become like a mini Met Gala watching these male athletes arrive to the stadium. And they have amazing outfits every time. There was one guy on the Chiefs called Devonta, and I don't know anything else about him.

He is six feet tall. He looks very thin. I think when I Googled him, he's like 100 kilograms or something. I don't know. He looks thin to be getting hit. He looks like a model. He looks like RuPaul. He looks like an elegant spider. He's just so gorgeous. And he...

Went into the stadium wearing this beautiful, tailored red outfit with a matching red bag and his bone structure so gorgeous. And I was just like, what? Who the hell is that? He looked like Kendall Jenner.

And these guys are blowing me away and good for them because why shouldn't men dress properly? Male comedians dress amazing now too. And I love to see it. I just think it's all a show. It's all a bit of glamour. Let us have it. And I am so much more interested in football now that Taylor Swift is attending games and that the players bother to scrub up. However, I do think it is a big punt that

For someone like Travis Kelsey to wear what he wore, walking into that stadium looking like a 1970s Richard Osman in like a burnt orange XL lapel jacket, kind of sparkly, flared jacket.

Who made that suit? The devil. I want to guess it was probably Gucci or someone like I just I've never searched this. I couldn't even bear to find out more about the suit. But if you're going to dress like that ostentatiously, you better win because there's nothing worse than arriving at a game looking like one of the village people and then having to leave in that same outfit after you didn't win.

Who made this suit? Kelsey, Super Bowl suit designer. Mike Amiri. Well, Mike. One year ago, the designer Mike Amiri won the fashion world equivalent of a championship ring when Travis Kelsey made his highly photographed stroll to the locker room at Super Bowl LV111 wearing a black boucle armat Amiri set. Okay, well then, I'm sorry if this current year was not Amiri.

Who made this one? God, you dodged a bullet there, Mike and Mary. Last year he looked okay. It was women's wear!

Oh, it was Mike Amiri again. Oh, Mike Amiri confirmed the outfit Travis Kelsey wore into the stadium this Super Bowl was meant for women when it was shown at Paris Fashion Week last month. But he knew it would still look the part for Kelsey. He's such a great person to dress because he can wear clothes. Clothes don't wear him. He can make anything kind of work. Incorrect.

Now, I absolutely believe in blurring the lines of gender. And I think more and more we will see that there isn't menswear and womenswear anymore. You can wear whatever you want. I wore one of Bobby's suits, suit shirts out last night. Like, it's fine, but not for this moment, Travis. And I think he's of the age where who knows if Travis Kelsey will play next year. I think that this was it. The halftime performance...

Was not well liked, I think, by the vast majority of people commenting, certainly on Bobby's formerly TikTok X app. I no longer have that app, but I saw even some of my girlfriends from home were like, oh, it was kind of boring. I didn't enjoy it. And some people suggested that maybe that style of music doesn't lend itself well.

to a Super Bowl halftime show. I didn't watch the halftime show just like I didn't watch the Super Bowl. Of course, I had mixed feelings about Kendrick Lamar wearing flares. I understand that Kendrick Lamar won a Grammy for a diss track allegedly about Drake who denies all allegations of being interested in A-minors. I don't really know what's going on there. Nothing would surprise me less.

There are tons of people in the music industry who have at the very least exchanged saucy DMs with a 15 or 16 year old. But I don't have any information on, you know, the specifics of that.

But what I do know is that Serena Williams once dated Drake and she appeared on stage with Kendrick Lamar doing her little crip walk that she had done to celebrate her 2012 Olympic win. She did it very well. She's a good little dancer. Anytime Serena Williams is in front of us, it's iconic. So you wouldn't need to have her there for controversy, you know, like, oh, you're

really making fun of your ex because you're in this Super Bowl performance. And she released a statement that just said, well, she didn't name Drake, but essentially she was going, I got the call to appear at the Super Bowl. When am I going to get another chance to appear at the Super Bowl and do my little crip walk from the Olympics? So I just said yes. And that's the end of story. So she's basically implying she didn't do it to make fun of Drake.

Then there's this man in America who's like, oh, well, if my wife is going on the Super Bowl to dog her ex, then she's not really my wife because she's still thinking about her ex and I would divorce her. That man, by the way, I don't even know who he is and he's not married. Any guesses why? Seems like a prick. But I saw other people suggesting that maybe Serena Williams doing this crip walk was inappropriate because she

Her sister was killed by gun violence in Compton. And the Crips are a gang known for, you know, violence in that area. And they're the ones who coined this Crip Walk. So if my sister had possibly been murdered by that gang, I don't know that I would do any of their work.

any of their dances. I couldn't find online if it was definitely gang violence that killed her sister, but she was killed in a drive-by shooting in Compton. So maybe that's the implication. I couldn't find if anybody was actually charged or if it was related to like purposeful violence

gang violence against her sister. But I mean, it's very sad to lose her. And Serena commented about her. She said, we were so close. She died at 31. She used to change my diapers like it was horrible. So I really think if Serena figured there was any implication there, you know, maybe she wouldn't be doing that dance. But people love to pick things apart. And her husband was very proud of her. He tweeted something about it, I'm told by Bobby. What do we call tweeting now if the site is X?

I saw Elon Musk's youngest son or his favorite son, they're calling him X, the one with Grimes who has that name that's like a bunch of letters, X, and then like symbols, E-I-1-1, whatever, but they call him X. I saw Elon Musk brought him to the White House. And there are several lip reading people trying to guess what he says to Donald Trump at one point.

but apparently he was very polite and then his mother grimes was like oh well don't really think he should have taken my son to the white house that's a very public event for such a little boy but i'm glad that he was polite what a living nightmare it would be to co-parent with elon musk i mean the the mental hoops that you would have to jump through because some people really like him they think he's a genius some people now think he's not a genius that he is a nazi

very probably neurodiverse, which is cool, but his people skills as a co-parent and as a very, very, very powerful, mind-bogglingly wealthy co-parent at that. Like people worry about their ex taking their kids on holiday or keeping them a little bit too long. How about, oh, he might take my child to the fucking moon. Oh, he might fire my youngest son up in a rocket with a load of tech billionaires.

Who knows where he'll be? I suppose these women knew what they were doing. Elon Musk has like 40 kids. But what a nightmare. Be grateful for the bum that you had your child with who has very little influence over anything at all. Not his own life or yours or your child's. It could always be worse.

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After 30 gigabytes, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers will pay $25 a month as long as they remain active on the Boost Unlimited plan. Another thing that caught my eye this week, and you know, this story has everything. It is a romantic comedy. It's a drama. It's a psychological thriller. There's an American woman called Anija Robinson who went viral worldwide for her bodacious demands and hilarious attitude in Pakistan.

So as a fan of dating abroad, I watch a lot of reality shows, 90 Day Fiancé and others on the subject, all the spinoffs. You love to see it. You will be familiar with the practice of catfishing. In many cases on the show, you will see women have been hoodwinked, usually by men. But in this case...

Anija lived in America and was having online video chats with a young man in Pakistan. He was only 18 years old. And it turned out she was catfishing him. She was using a Nicki Minaj filter. You can go on social media. I've seen a few creators using this filter themselves. So you can see just how beautiful it makes you look. And she was speaking to him for months and months. She's 33 or maybe 36.

And one day they make plans to meet. So she flies over to Pakistan to meet him. And he saw her in the airport and basically ran. And instead of licking her wounds and feeling rejected, she has just dug her heels in and captured the attention and the imagination of the entire country. And being like, I am going to stay here and get a Pakistani passport. And I'm going to rebuild Pakistan. And I'm not leaving. And she...

She's holding her own press conferences. Now, they have offered her a hotel and a free ticket home, the government, which goes to show, like, who's the third world country? I think a lot of Western people have ideas about the East and what it's like over there and what human rights are like over there. Well, here's a woman from another country who is refusing to leave after allegedly, well, it's not like defrauding this man, but she...

fooled him one of their own citizens she tricked him and then she's come to this country an older woman preying on an 18 year old with a filter and refusing to leave and they're like oh well we'll look after you we'll give you medical care we'll give you a hotel we'll buy you a plane ticket home like they can see just like I can hypothesize I think this woman's quite mentally unwell and

But basically, she's dubbed the queen of Pakistan now. They've embraced her. She's seen in a slew of videos in local Pakistan news over the past weeks either smoking a cigarette or making big demands for monetary compensation. So at one of her press conferences, she's like, I am going to make Pakistan even better. I'm going to need 100 grand by the end of the week, 20 grand in my pocket today. How does a random psycho even organize the...

infrastructure of getting like cameras and journalists and people to come to her press conference. I just don't think anyone in the country has seen madness like it. She has placed McDonald's orders. Her McDonald's order was two McDoubles, two large fries with extra salt, two apple pies and a large Fanta orange soda during the press conference.

There are men like queuing up to date her now. The government is going to fix up these buildings, fix up these streets and clean up the streets. It's ridiculous out here. I do not like it, she said. Pakistan is in need of new buses, new cabs, new cars. Pakistan needs to be reconstructed.

Robinson then added in the press conference that she was married to Nidal Ahmed and that the two of them were moving to Dubai. And this is the guy that she catfished. When asked where her family was, she replied, I'm Muslim. It's against my religion to tell you all my business. Now, all these news outlets want to talk to her more because she's obviously a viral sensation. And she says she won't talk unless they give her land and an allowance of two grand a week.

The internet is loving this woman. She is a New Yorker with an unmatched hustle. And maybe this is what men in Pakistan are looking for. Go down the social media rabbit hole of Anija Robinson, if you have not already. She looks incredible. She wears a hijab and these pencil-thin eyebrows. I'm sorry, if Kendrick Lamar is wearing hijab,

bell bottoms, flared jeans to the Super Bowl 2025, those pencil-thin eyebrows could be back at any moment, especially with this hot influencer on the airwigs. I've been listening to so many podcasts on tour, and I love...

I love Louis Theroux. It will have been suggested to you already if you don't listen to it yet. It's one of the top podcasts every week. Louis Theroux is one of the finest journalists in the world. I feel so lucky to know him, to get to be alive at the same time as he is. He's just such a unique talent.

And I think it's crazy that someone like Armie Hammer would agree to sit down and chat to him from his Los Angeles home. So some of the younger ones will not remember that a few years ago, maybe five, maybe more years ago, I think it was less than five. I think it was kind of when all these women's stories started coming out.

kind of during the pandemic about like, hey, we shouldn't be coercively controlled and abused and like sexually manipulated anymore. And some of these guys like, let's get our stories out and see if this is a pattern and if certain people are dangerous. Even if laws aren't broken, it's very difficult to prove a law is broken. Sometimes when women get together and talk, not to take anyone down, just to warn each other, like a pattern is established and then you go, oh, this guy is

is weird, strange. So Armie Hammer was accused of being a cannibal by different women. A lot of text messages came out. At the time, I had a small baby. I was not interested in going down the rabbit hole of these text messages. But just today in the car, I started listening to Louis Theroux's sit-down interview with him. And I'm going to save it because Annie is a massive fan. And we're on tour again February 20th in Doncaster, Nottingham, Sheffield, other places. And we're going to listen to it then. But oh my gosh.

right away as a 41 year old woman I didn't have this spidey sense at age 20 and Armie Hammer vehemently denies all accusations made against him but just doing the school run after I'd pick the like drop the kids off not pick them up it's really not appropriate for children to listen to there's like a lot of triggering uh descriptions of sexual language in it and violence but um

As soon as I heard his voice, I was like, this is a psychopath, allegedly, just my opinion. I heard him speaking and he was kind of just talking about his career and then trying to explain away the text messages. And I'll let you listen to the episode for yourself. But the long and short of it is like, I just got psychopath vibes. And for a man like him to think that

I'm smarter than Louis Theroux, you know, like he would not have sat down with Louis Theroux unless he thought he could trick him, get him on side, get him to believe him. Like at one point he gets annoyed about how the interview is going. He's like, I really didn't like you bring up all that stuff about me being a cannibal. It's like, what did you think he was going to ask you? If you can't sit through a podcast interview without getting visibly enraged,

then maybe you have some issues. Like you know you're being filmed, you know you're being recorded, you know it's going to be broadcast, and you're still a dick? Then what are you like when nobody's watching?

Oh, also the Kardashians are back. And I was moved to tears in episode one when I saw Khloe's ex-husband, Lamar Odom, coming back to collect some of his things. And this, you know, people can discount that family and be like, oh, they're just rich and have plastic surgery and spend all their money. And it's just a show about like interiors. Yes, correct. Like it's very much that.

But also, they get some hard-hitting topics over the line. They had a whole episode one season about Planned Parenthood. They talk about redemption of incarcerated people who deserve a second chance. Kim's at the White House in episode one. You know, all important stuff. But this thing with Khloe and Lamar, Khloe, from the day we became aware of her in her early 20s, has just been a scrupulous angel.

an angel called the fat sister, called the ugly sister. She has been mistreated by her family and by men and by the public for all of her life. And she holds her head up high and she never falters. She never wavers from doing exactly the right thing. So if you don't know, which I'm sure you do know, long story short, Lamar and Chloe married when he was, I don't know, 30 something and she was 24. He already had previously been married. He had kids from previous relationships.

And Chloe thought this was the love of her life. They were married 30 days after they met. And it turned out, unbeknownst to a lot of us, that Lamar Odom, this basketball player, her husband, had drug dependency issues. He had a very complicated childhood full of trauma. Unfortunately, there are men who just don't have the outlets or language or early enough intervention to talk about some of these things and get them fixed.

And because they're in such a state of like coping with drugs, they don't really see, I think, how much it hurts the rest of their family, their friends, people who love them.

So Lamar was found in a brothel nearly dead one night. And of course he went to the brothel because he was using drugs. I don't know if he was the kind of man who would just take himself down to the sex ranch if he was sober, but bad decisions lead to more bad decisions. If you're someone who has an alcohol problem, well, one night you might take cocaine. If you're someone who might take cocaine, then well, you might go get more cocaine from the local sex workers and you might die there. And then you're

innocent family who like barely knew you had a problem are going to have to get a phone call. By the way, the sex workers called an ambulance in this case, but what if they don't? Like what if a scared like freelance sex worker calls a drug dealer friend or a pimp and they just get rid of your body? And then all of a sudden someone has to piece together the life of like a husband and father who's found in a river with drugs in his system. You're like, huh? So like get it together, lads. Not all lads, but you know.

It's very dangerous. And I see that. I see I have empathy for Lamar, just like Chloe has empathy for Lamar. And he had wealth and he had a lot of important trophies and meaningful pieces of jewelry and things that belong to him. Chloe gave a storage key to his friend and the friend just sold his stuff. Like everyone seems to exploit Lamar in his life. And that's probably because he hangs out with other addicts.

But Chloe, for nine years, after getting Lamar back on his feet, after putting him in a house next door with 24-hour nursing care so she could look after him, she finds him relapsing and she just goes, okay, you have to get out. And he hasn't seen her. She hasn't seen him in nine years. So they organize this meeting and he comes in and he just looks like,

Disturbed is the only way to put it. He's sweating. He looks nervous. I think he looks like he's using, though I don't really know what using looks like, but something looked really off to me. But again, like he has brain damage, permanent brain damage from all the other times he was using. So who knows? He couldn't string a sentence together. He clearly still loves Chloe. He's not wrong. He's articulate enough to be like,

What you did for me and how you've always shown up for me, part of me will always love you. Ding, ding, ding. Like you will never, ever, ever, ever, ever get a better woman than Chloe in 10,000 more lifetimes. I actually feel bad for a guy like that. A guy who fumbles the ball that spectacularly. Like, oof, that will hurt for the rest of your life.

Like, oh, actually, hang on. I had a window into a beautiful future and a family with a woman who would have been loyal and stood by my side. And instead, I couldn't navigate this drug dependency issue. That's the tragedy of it. And she gives him back a trophy that she kept for him, this important necklace that symbolized his deceased mother, grandmother, and baby son.

heavy stuff. And he was like, you could see in his eyes, he's like, here's the one person that I have hurt more than anyone else. And she through all of it has never exploited me. And by the way, I don't like perpetuating the idea that there should be honor in that, that a woman should always understand, stand by a man's side, look after him, exploit her own resources to look after him.

through her own grief, like prioritize him because he nearly died at the sex ranch. I don't know if Chloe should have done that. It was a very, very like godly and unselfish thing for her to do, but at what personal expense? I think if she had walked away and sold his shit, that would have been equally fair.

But there are some women who will walk away from that and other women who are like, I will just always, no matter what, do the right thing. And then eventually, if you hit my last boundary, I will walk away. But walk away with dignity and elegance. And that's what Khloe has always done. As evidenced by the fact that Tristan is even still in her life.

Wild. There's so much good TV. I'll tell you about one more TV thing, but it's also like a personal story. I'm going to Ireland with Bobby for Valentine's Day tomorrow. We're going to be in Dublin. If you have any recommends, we are going to be on the Late Late Show with, well, I mean, I don't know if I have seen this announced anywhere. With Chris O'Dowd and other people, I'll put it that way. Late Late Show. Have they announced the lineup? Why wouldn't they? It's tomorrow.

I mean, I don't see it anywhere, so maybe I'm not supposed to. Anyway, Chris O'Dowd has this really funny new series called Small Town Big Story. And we went to a screening of it last night. And Louis Theroux was there, actually. We got talking about the Army Hammer podcast. And it's just really funny. It's on Sky. It's a Sky original. It's great and innovative. And I know that Ireland is going to love it.

But Bobby and I are gone for like 24 full hours for a Valentine's Day in Dublin. And I just can't wait. And it's going to be so fun. And then we're there promoting some of the Irish tour dates that I have coming later in the year.

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Please play responsibly. Must be 18 years or older to purchase, play, or claim. I thought a letter to close things off today. My boyfriend of 10 years has two girlfriends and a wife. Listener, I try. I try to change my opinions of these men. But everything in the media and everything that comes directly into my inbox, it really cuts like a knife. Let's get into it.

Katherine, I don't know where to start. I need to tell everybody everything. My entire life has been turned upside down. I was with my boyfriend for almost 10 years. I truly believed we were happy building a future together. Then a few months ago, I found out he was cheating on me with someone he'd been dating for over a year. I was devastated, but it turns out that was just the tip of the iceberg. When I confronted him, he denied it and left for the U.S., where he works sometimes. I

I reached out to the other woman and she didn't believe me at first. Then out of nowhere, I get a call from the police. She had reported me for domestic abuse. Of course, this was completely false. I thought it was a nightmare. I was told I could not contact either of them. A few days later, though, she reached out to me. He had just blocked her and married a woman he was seeing in the U.S.,

It turns out he had manipulated her into making that police report by telling her it was the only way they could be together and he couldn't return unless I was kept away from them both. The

The moment the police started investigating, though, he completely blocked her and disappeared. We started talking and everything painfully unraveled. He'd been playing both of us against each other for over a year. She just lived up the road from me. And the whole time he was in the U.S. for work, he had been pursuing a wealthy widow with two young children. He married her just before Christmas Day. The lies don't stop there. There's also another woman, someone local I know through friends.

who he'd been seeing on the side. He encouraged her to leave her husband for him, which she did, and then he disappeared.

The most surreal part, my ex's girlfriend, who is now my friend, found photos of the wedding. She actually dry cleaned his wedding suit before he left for the US, thinking he was just going on a work trip. He told both of us he would be back. He even told me this girl was a one-off, just a wobble. He never even broke up with either of us. Now, he's cut anyone who knows the truth out of his life completely.

And here I am heartbroken, not just over losing him, but over the fact that the man I loved never really existed. I thought he was my best friend. I spent 10 years. Let's just give that a minute to sink in. 10 years loving someone who is capable of all this. I feel sick knowing what he's done and I feel powerless to stop it. I've seen photos of him with his new wife, swimming with her little children.

And I just want to scream. I know she won't believe me if I tell her. His lies are that good. But should I try? Should I warn her? Even if I know she won't listen? I feel like I have to do something, but I don't even know where to begin. What would you do? Well, you know, I have said on this podcast before, don't get involved, don't get involved. But I feel like this is different. I feel like this man is actually a danger to society. And sure, you tried once.

to tell the other woman in your neighborhood that he was seeing and she didn't believe you and she shot the messenger and she had you investigated by the police. This is why I usually say like, don't get involved. It's not worth it. But I think it's so great that she came around because the two of you are stronger together. You have evidence to corroborate. You have this other third woman down the road. And trust me, you know, in your heart, there will be more.

And then we've got this poor American woman who's a widow. She's vulnerable. She's got small kids. So he met her on one of his work trips during your 10-year relationship. If a man is able to lie that smooth and be so sociopathic as to lead a woman on for 10 years, there could be a woman he's let on even longer than you.

then who knows what he's capable of doing to these children. I don't mean he's gonna like physically hurt them or sell them or what, but he's a psycho. And if I'm a woman being gaslit by this like romantic, you know, whatever he is, Tinder swindler, then I wouldn't want him around my children because whatever mind games, you know, and their mother is going to find out probably at some point and she's going to crash. And then that leaves these children where? I think...

Oh, I think we need listener legal advice because you don't want to get done for harassment. But if there was a way that you could publicize a description of this guy and like black out his eyes like they might do in a facelift video.

Like just make it so that his identity is concealed, but women who are sleeping with him knows what he looks like. Especially if you outline the behavior and be like, it started like this. This happened. I found out about this one. I found out about that one. He goes to America. You could leave a few breadcrumbs that a woman who actually is in a form of relationship with him would recognize.

And then you all get your stories together and you find out if he's doing this fraudulently, like it's probably no coincidence that he married the wealthy one who's a widow, it might have killed her husband. I think you need to watch the movie The Other Woman starring Nicki Minaj, Cameron Diaz, and my favorite actress, maybe on the planet, Leslie Mann. And I think you and these other women could really do something amazing. And maybe we could even make a documentary of it. Wouldn't that be wild?

we might get in trouble. It could be its own podcast series. I wonder what the legalities are around that. If anybody knows, because like how are you as an investigative journalist like supposed to get to the bottom of something without becoming like the new Blake Lively of some like legal storm?

And can I separately say, I am so sorry that this happened to you. And it makes every ounce of sense that you would be hurt, that you would be grief stricken, that you would be betrayed. You have so many complicated emotions, like all crashing down, anger, confusion, because that's exactly what it is. You were in love with a person who never existed. And you are going to have to mourn that version of the man like a death.

So I really hope that in addition to reaching out to me, you are seeking care for this injury because I bet it physically hurts and you need to be speaking to a professional about it. I'll handle the documentary side of things. Hopefully we'll get some legal advice, but please look after yourself and don't ever feel stupid for a second.

He knows what he's doing. He's done it a million times before. He chose you for a reason. And there are certain men, I saw this on the Slumflower Chidera Egeru, the Slumflower Hour, if you don't listen, start. Where have you been? She posted on her socials that it was a Trevor Noah bit, actually, where he was talking about men and some of them and the way they hunt and that they don't just want any kind of

conquest. They want this exquisite bird. They want the most unique, exotic, and exquisite bird. And what do they want to do with her? They want to keep it in a cage. And this was an analogy about poaching, I think. I don't know. He's South African. But you know what I mean? Think about it. You are very exquisite. It was a challenge for him to have you, to keep you, to get you. These are the games that they play. It doesn't mean you're stupid. It means quite the opposite.

It means your independence and your cleverness and your empathy is what attracted to him. And wasn't he like excited to be able to have you for the time that he did? And that's what makes him like a predator, not a sex predator maybe, but some type of romance predator. Please email me if you have any advice about what to do about this. This is happening in the UK. I feel like we need to find this guy. Get him extradited.

Find out what's up. Save this widow and her children. Telling everybody everything at gmail.com. I'm back on tour from February 20th. Please come see me specifically at the Palladium. I think the March dates are sold out, but the April ones are not. And if they don't, the May ones will never go on sale.

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