Reality TV Saved My Life
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Hello and welcome to another episode of Telling Everybody Everything. I am in Edinburgh today without the children, which is so much fun and I do miss them and I feel badly, but it is just good to get away and I'm getting used to it. I think the more you do it, the more you can do it and we're moving around every day, so it would be a little stressful for the kids. We flew into Aberdeen and

Then we drove to Dunfermline. Then today we're in Edinburgh. And tomorrow we're in Newcastle. And then the next day we're in Blackpool. And then we're home. And as soon as I get home, I have to drive home the evening from Blackpool. So we'll get in at like 2 a.m., I think. And then I have to work that morning. And I just haven't had a lot of time. We even have a stand-in nanny because it's Miriam's birthday. She's gone on holiday. And I just feel like it is only a matter of time before...

my children start calling her mom because I'm out all day Monday, all day Tuesday, all day Wednesday, Tuesday night even. I have a very exciting charity gig with loads of other comedians at the Royal Albert Hall and that is very rare to be able to see other comedians when we're all like ships passing in the night. So I'm super excited even just to play the Royal Albert Hall is like a lifelong dream. It is so beautiful and it's a really wonderful charity as well. So I just can't wait.

But then Thursday, again, I'm off to Ireland. And this brings me to a phone call I just received that has upset me a little bit. I don't think I'm upset, like sad. I'm very confusing because I will cry if I'm lost, like trying to find an address with a time constraint and I'm lost. This used to happen a lot before smartphones. Or when I'm angry. And I can't stay angry for very long, which was a bit of a superpower and a hindrance.

because harmony is my favorite state of being so I forgive people maybe too quickly and then I just simmer with autoimmune disease. But anyway, self-care has not been high on my list and by self-care I even mean like going to the doctor like I have to have an arrangement with my dentist where I'll just call them if I find an hour and I'm like any cancellations right now? And they're so nice to me and they're only down the road they're like yeah so I will go to the dentist

Like as a last minute cancellation fill in only. And I've had a mole on my arm that I told you about last week. I went and had removed. The only reason that they agreed to remove it was because I went to a fancy private place in South Kensington and I paid them a grant. I don't believe that on the NHS they ever would have removed this mole because they

I don't know how long ago. I'm looking through my emails to find out how long ago. I think eight, six to eight months ago, I went to another private clinic

and gave them 300 pounds for a seven minute consultation. I was in that room for seven minutes and the doctor was like, "I do melanoma on the NHS. It's all I do. I know all about skin cancer. I'm the man. This is not melanoma. Goodbye." He was really nice to me and he gave me the news that I wanted. I think it's really easy to take a diagnosis of you're healthy and just walk away. You go, "Great. The doctor said I'm healthy." And you walk away and you don't think about it again because that is the easiest news.

But the mole kept changing and I know a lot about melanoma. I've had stage two melanoma as a very young woman at age like 21 on my leg.

And I've spoken about that before. Even that didn't like tremendously look like traditional melanoma to me, but fair enough. Like it had some discoloration and asymmetry, a little bit of black, a little bit of red, but I mean, it was a flat mole. It was not that bad, not that big, but it was stage two melanoma. So that was bad. And I had to have a full general anesthetic and a surgery to remove like a golf ball size of my leg. Because if you know about melanoma, you'll know it is a deadly form of skin cancer. It does spread quickly.

And I just felt like this mole wasn't right. It's on my arm. I showed pictures of it on my social media. This is like the hole from having it removed.

I went in and I wanted the doctor to remove a bigger piece of it and stitch it up in a straight line. But even when he looked at it, he was like, not melanoma, totally fine. I will do the shave and send it away for histology. And then if it comes back of anything, if there's any borders that we missed, then we'll do the deeper cut. And I even went in, I was like, just do the deeper cut now. Like, just do it. And he's like, well, it's half the price for you and you don't need the deeper cut. Let's just take it off and we'll test it. And I thought, all right, we'll take it off and we'll test it. Fine.

Um, so he rang me today and it did come back melanoma. And he said, it's early melanoma. And he was shocked. He's like, it doesn't look like melanoma, but it is melanoma. And you need to come back on Monday, which I don't have time on Monday, but luckily he made some time for me in the afternoon. Again, I don't see this ever happening with a NHS. And like, you know, I don't mean to dog the NHS. I just think they're obviously oversubscribed over, um,

attended and even in Canada when it was stage two melanoma they were like but it's August and a lot of doctors are on holiday so we can do it for you in like three months I was like what so I'm very lucky to have access to this clinic who are happy to do the the extra removal for me to make sure they got all the borders on Monday but it just feels crazy to me like what could have happened

If I hadn't been my own advocate and I will continue to be my own advocate. If I hadn't pushed, if I had taken that good answer the first time and walked away, then I would have had melanoma just growing and spreading in my arm. And I would say, oh no, the doctor said it's fine. It's fine. And God knows how far that would have gone. And I did look back at my emails and I started making noises about this mole in 2022. So that's three years ago.

I messaged my private dermatologist who retired and his secretary was like, well, he is retired, but maybe we can send you somewhere else. And then I never followed up. And then I messaged a private dermatologist in my area and they were like, we want you to come into a consultation. And after that, maybe we'll take it off. And I just couldn't be fucked with that. I was too busy. I was like, no, no, no. So now it's 2025 and I finally got it removed. So it has been changing for three years that I know of. It may not have been melanoma that entire time,

But it has been inflamed and there's been an immune reaction against whatever's going on in that mold for at least three years that I have documented in my emails with photos as well. And I told my husband, Bobby, I called him as soon as I got off the phone and I was upset when I called him just because I feel very lucky, but I also feel like, what the fuck?

Like it's not ideal to have melanoma twice in your life. I obviously have a genetic predisposition. I'm someone with type one, very fair Celtic skin. I have over a hundred moles. That is the criteria. And I don't go in the sun. That's the thing. I wear SPF all the time. I cover my body. I cover my arms. I cover my face. But here's my second kind of go with melanoma that I know of. And now I'm thinking, what other moles do I need to have checked?

So we need to go and do the mole mapping. I think every fair skinned person just needs to be careful about that. The reason I haven't done it though is because I don't have a lot of time. Well, it sounds stupid to say now because like you can die from melanoma. So like if you want to have time, you have to make space in your day for these appointments.

And the last pregnancy that I lost as well, I blamed myself because I didn't have time. I was like, I missed a few appointments. I should have been going to acupuncture. I shouldn't have been flying so much. I should have been getting IVs. I should have, should have, should have, but I just don't make that time. And like ladies who listen, especially over 40 and men, because men never go to the doctor. It is so worth being your own advocate and making that time because you just never know. And the whole reason that I was reminded to go back

was Beverly Hills Housewives, the real housewives of Beverly Hills because I mentioned last week, Teddy Mellencamp pops up with one melanoma that turns to, oh, you have 16 melanoma and now it's in your brain. And God bless that woman for being so transparent about her journey for sharing photos, for sharing scar photos after surgery, like the whole journey that she's been through is so well-documented.

And I don't know what happened with her for it to be missed, for it to be misdiagnosed, for it to be ignored, like for her to get to a stage where it has metastasized and she's got 16 melanoma. And now, you know, she has to deal with all the treatments.

following the diagnosis. Like I'm very lucky that I don't think I'm going to have to have that. When I had melanoma the first time, it had not spread into my lymph nodes. I didn't have to have chemo or anything else. And this time the doctor said it is very early. So I highly doubt

that it has spread. I don't have any swollen lymph nodes. I don't have any symptoms of like, you know, you can feel the lymph nodes in your groin and in your armpits. And that's usually what the doctors would do. But now I have to go and check all that anyway, and check bloods and see if I have any markers for that anywhere else. And it's just kind of a fucking nightmare. But also I'm just so lucky, like so lucky that I have the wherewithal

and the financial freedom to be like, "Take this mole off right now." And he was great, the surgeon. He's a plastic surgeon. I thought he was a dermatologist, but he's a plastic surgeon at this hospital where I went. He was great. He took it off, but he wouldn't have. He looked at it and he was like, "That's not melanoma." And I was like, "Okay, well, please take it off and test it." And it was melanoma. So, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And the kids have moles on their heads.

Fred and Fena have identical moles on their little white porcelain blonde heads. And those moles change all the time. And I'm always photographing them in the bath. And like Violet the other day came in and I had Fred's hair separated. I was like, take a photo of this mole. And I think everyone sort of assumes that I'm nuts, but I know what I'm doing. I took Fred to a pediatric dermatologist about the mole on his head. And she said the same shit. No, it's fine. Okay. Well, guess who's going back in April? Fred. I've already called her. I'm like,

I know you said it's fine. I don't know if it's fine. And it would be so rare for a young child to have melanoma, but it does happen. They can find melanoma behind your eyes and you have no symptoms of that until it like shows up in your liver. Like my dear God. So it's just another thing I have to do, but I'm going to go to work that day. I'm going to get him from Blackpool. I'm going to go to work all day. And then when I finish at dinnertime, I wouldn't have seen my kids yet.

I'm going to go to the hospital and get more of my arm dug out. And then I'm going to do bedtime bath time, hopefully not get the mole wet. And then I'm going to go to work the next day from 7 a.m. till 11 p.m. And I'm very lucky to have my job. But like, I don't know, Catherine Ryan, I don't know what you think you're doing in this town. I have it so much easier than everyone.

it's difficult for anyone to be like no i won't go do that job i won't go take that opportunity i especially if you love your job or especially if you don't love your job but you have to put food on the table i mean people are in both situations but like get that checkup if you think something might be wrong even if you hear no the first time and i don't want any hypochondriacs out there just like fueling the fire of your anxiety but i am not a hypochondriac

So if I knew something was up about this mole, like, I'm so glad that I pushed these doctors to trust me. I just hope it hasn't spread. Okay. We know that Mr. Kanye West has had a very busy week on social media. Very busy. He's been tweeting absolutely deplorable things about Jay-Z and Beyonce's children. He's tweeted a list of his enemies.

He's tweeted that Jay-Z is probably going to kill him now. He's tweeted that the Kardashians are sex traffickers and that they have black children explicitly for that purpose. I hypothesized mid Kanye breakdown when it was all very anti-Semitic. I thought, I think this is his art right now.

And I don't support it. I don't think it's okay. Hate speech emboldens actual racist antisemitics, like people who are dangerous. Hate speech, even like as a Kanye West out-of-the-box art form, is dangerous. I don't condone it. But I did think, oh, I see what he's doing. I think he's purposely saying the most cancelable, disgusting things to be provocative. Like, I think that's what he's doing. And now with this, calling someone's child...

what he put in writing about Beyonce and Jay-Z's kids is like the worst thing you can say. It's a cancelable offense. Like it's completely irredeemable. So I thought, is this, this must be what he's doing. And then when he called the Kardashians sex traffickers, I was like, well, he's not actually. Because the worst thing you can do is be a pedophile. It is being a sex trafficker. So if that were his art form that he's doing right now, just trying to say the worst things,

He wouldn't be calling someone else a pedophile. He would be saying that he is a pedophile. Like if he's an anti-Semite and he's this and he's that, be a pedophile as well. So now I know that I was wrong and that's not what he's doing. He really is just like quite disturbed because that's the thing. That's the cancelable one. If he was just trying to wind us up and say the worst stuff, surely that would be it.

Although he's got Northwest now on a song with P. Diddy. He supports P. Diddy, supports P. Diddy's kids. And that's another beef that he had this week with Kim. He's like, Kim owns the trademark of Northwest. Well, thank God she does. What a smart move by Kim. Say what you want about Kim. Like a lot of people are actually in my mentions as well because I noticed a pair of Skims black pajamas when I was just perusing Net-A-Porter because I have reached...

a very important person status, and that means I get a 20% discount on my next order. I don't really need anything. I ended up buying a bunch of Ralph Lauren stuff for Violet because polo is really cool right now. But I went to look to be like, do I need anything for myself? I don't. I need surgery on my arm and no new clothes because they'll just get bloody. And I have everything I need. But when I saw this Kim's pajamas, I thought about when Violet was born and I wore these bubblegum pink pajamas to her birth like a tool for

In my defense, I was a 25-year-old teen mom, and I knew I was having a girl. So I was like, I'm going to make pajamas. I absolutely bled all over them, like before and after. And then my mom, luckily, was on a flight, and my best friend was coming, and they brought me some new black pajamas. But I just took it as an opportunity to be like, if you're having a baby this year, these are some nice pajamas to treat yourself. They're 120 pounds, the Skims black pajamas, but there is a dupe on Amazon for like 23 pounds.

My friend Ashley told me after I posted it. But so many people were in my mentions being like, how could you support Kim Kardashian? Like, why don't you promote a brand of pajamas that hasn't colluded with Elon Musk this week? And I have totally missed that. Like people being angry with Elon Musk and Tesla and people are burning Teslas. There's a lot of political unrest in America. But I mean, I'm just living my best life in Scotland. So I missed a lot of it. But I said like,

I got a few messages and that was fine. I was like, well, I still like the Kardashians. I like people with whom I disagree all the time. It's not new. But all the people were like, you shouldn't be promoting her. You shouldn't be doing this. I was like, hang on. Are you messaging me via Mark Zuckerberg's meta platform or not? And they were like, yes. Well, yeah. Yes. I do use Instagram, but...

I'm allowed because I don't have a platform as big as yours. But if you have a big platform, you should not be. Well, my platform is Instagram, number one. And secondly, like it's impossible not to use all of these companies. And I appreciate people in Canada especially are taking steps

They're drinking Canadianos now instead of Americanos. They're trying to support Canadian businesses, especially small businesses, because of everything politically that's going on in America, in addition to Donald Trump saying that he's going to colonize Canada. I mean, yeah, you can do little things, but there are like three companies in the world. So what are you going to do? Like,

Stop traveling. Stop like using oil and gas entirely. Stop eating. Stop like you have to go live off grid if you feel that way. And it is good. It's good to be sustainable and turn to brands who are doing good things. But you can't come and like attack somebody else because they have shared a photo of Skims pajamas. All right. Don't buy the Skims pajamas ones. Buy the ones on Amazon, the Jeff Bezos pajamas. Who do you think he's friends with?

And I think the time to advocate for that was during the massive handover of wealth, when the billionaire economy became bigger than ever during COVID, when we were all stuck at home and every small business was closed and there was a massive transfer of wealth worldwide. Like now, I don't blame Kim Kardashian for cozying up to Elon Musk. I would have one of his kids if I could to keep me in the clear.

Although maybe those women are in more danger than anyone else. And it's very difficult to settle a custody dispute on the moon. Canada's Got Talent is airing now in Canada. And if you don't live in Canada, they are so good about sharing loads of clips of the amazing talented acts on their social media and some of the acts that didn't go so well. My job on that show is to be a little bit of a disruptor. I am supposed to be a little bit provocative sometimes.

and i tried to fulfill that brief i don't think that i'm like necessarily mean-spirited a lot of times when i gave negative comments i sort of felt like maybe that audition was a piss take like maybe the person knew a little bit that going into it they didn't have a million dollar act and they were like i don't care i want to be funny on tv anyway give it a go and maybe i'll get some negative comments but i am like emotionally prepared for that but episode one

I had a few like scuffles with the talent. One young woman specifically ripped a hula hoop off my ankle and said it was too expensive for me to use, but she's the one who asked me to try her talent and I think I executed it beautifully. I'm willing to have a go. All I said to her is that it's not a million dollar act. It's something that I've seen in a multitude of children's parties. But she is good, you know, like I would book her. Well, possibly not because of the bad attitude, but like she's a good act.

It's fun. Hula hooping's great. She's a very beautiful girl, but not for a million dollars. No. And so I'm the one who's ready to say that. And I'm not just going to say no. I'm going to say no with a joke. So I did say to a young woman, well, she was from Alberta and I thought it was appropriate to make a Wayne Gretzky reference because she was also skating. And I said, Wayne Gretzky, famous Canadian ice hockey player, Wayne Gretzky said, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. And you're an example of how sometimes you miss the shots you do take as well.

It's a little joke, possibly unnecessary to say when she's already on her way out. But like my job is to deliver jokes on the show. And I love Canada's Got Talent. Like there's so much talent. But why would they hire me? Think about it, Susan. Why would they hire me for me to like fly over and sit there and just be like, good job, buddy. Good job, buddy. Maybe next time, pal. No, I think I'm hired to come there as myself and to deliver what my craft is, which is live.

telling jokes as often as I can. So that's what I'm there to do and I don't mind being a disruptor and I've got a lot of older ladies in my mentions now commenting on my photos being like, you are a bad person, you are mean and I won't be watching and I think that's good. That can only be a positive sign. I don't set out to upset anybody ever but like I wouldn't want to just be there invisibly

and create no drama for the show. And it's a great show. And if you don't want to see me being mean, I'm only mean like maybe twice a night. And there's loads of incredible talent, like international talent. I got to get to Japan. This is on my bucket list. I got to get to Japan because two of the funniest acts that I've ever seen were Japanese. Like they bring a real like Japanese game show, silly element. I just loved seeing them so much. I looked forward to every single act that walked on that stage. I was like, something's going to be incredible.

So you can watch almost all of the clips as every episode comes out on Instagram. If you live in Canada, then you can watch it on CTV. But it's so much fun even to watch the clips and you can share the clips on Instagram. And then maybe one day they'll let me be on Britain's Got Talent. And then you can watch me be mean there.

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Raise the rudders. Raise the sails. Raise the sails. Captain, an unidentified ship is approaching. Over. Roger. Wait, is that an enterprise sales solution? Reach sales professionals, not professional sailors. With LinkedIn ads, you can target the right people by industry, job title, and more. We'll even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign. Get started today at linkedin.com slash results. Terms and conditions apply.

Kim K has revealed that she has both buyers and sellers remorse about one of her former wedding rings on a recent episode detailing her trip with Khloe to Mumbai for the much Ballyhooed Ambani wedding. Do you remember that? July 2024? I do.

We have covered it extensively on telling everybody everything, but the topic of wedding rings came up and whether or not Kim K has kept all of hers, because by now you know she has a collection. And that's when Kim dropped this little gem. The 18-carat emerald cut she received from short-lived hubby number two, Chris Humphries, was actually bought and paid for by herself. No shock there. Well, four-fifths of it anyway, she said. He contributed a fifth.

which I think is very fair considering the discrepancy in wealth. And I loved it. Back when Kanye was just a run-of-the-mill disruptor, he said that a lot of beautiful women date rich black men or rich white men. I forget what he said. He goes, not my wife. She only dates broke black men. And yeah, Kim has more money than people. So she could do the humble thing where she's like, all right, Chris, buy me a wedding ring in your price range and I'll wear it.

It would look ridiculous on her. Kim K cannot be wearing like a run-of-the-mill wedding band, so she's going to have to pony up the cash. That means she should wear the ring that she wants. And if that's important to her, that a man be able to provide a ring for her that is the type of ring that you would normally expect to see on Kim K, then she needs to be marrying some sheikh, just like the Ambani girl did, rather than a half-rate basketball player who has less money than she does.

He ended up getting all fifths back, though, as she revealed that was one of the conditions of their divorce. I was pregnant with Northwest, still married to Chris Humphries, and in order to divorce him, he said I had to give him the ring in my divorce. But I would have loved a collection, she said.

A little refresher on Mr. and Mrs. Humphries, Kim married this former NBA player in 2011, divorcing after 72 days of marriage due to irreconcilable differences. In recent years, Kim admitted that she felt pressured to go through with her 2011 wedding because it was going to be filmed for the show.

I thought, okay, we're filming for Keeping Up. So if I leave, I'm going to be known as the runaway bride forever. And it's going to be a huge joke. And I think I just have cold feet. So I was like, okay, guys, I've just got cold feet. I got this. It's cold feet, but let's film the show. What a professional. It ended up as a joke anyway, though. And that's the lesson. Like the 72 day marriage thing was probably a bigger punchline.

than if she hadn't gotten married at all. And I have actually heard this from so many women, including my own mother, who was like, I knew walking down the aisle that it was a mistake, but I went through with it anyway, because I had the dress on. And it's a lot of pressure. But I've always said, you can stop any bad decision in motion, any bad decision. And again, Kanye is a good example of this. Do you remember the episode where

Was it a Keeping Up with the Kardashians episode or was it his documentary? It was his documentary where he was somewhere getting a pedicure. Some ladies had come to the house that they were staying in and they were working on music and she was giving him a pedicure and he was like, ouch, oh, I don't want the pedicure anymore. And she was like, oh, no, no, let me continue. And he was like, no, they're my feet. No, no one in Britain would ever have the balls to do that. This is the country where people sit through bad haircuts.

And they don't complain. And they'll like eat food at a restaurant that is making them sick in real time. They won't return it. Like they're so polite. But there's a time when politeness crosses over into like impacting you quite badly. I think we need to practice. Like there is absolutely no shame in just going, no, stop this now. It's not going to get better from here. I'm out.

Also this week, Liver Pudley and acting treasure Jason Isaacs got his knickers in a twist during an appearance on American Chat Show when Oprah's BFF and soon-to-be astronaut Gayle King interrogated him about his character going full frontal in series three of the critically acclaimed White Lotus.

"Was that you or was that a prosthetic?" King asked. "Because we were debating it. A lot of people were debating it. It's all over the internet." Isaacs replied. "You didn't answer the question!" King exclaimed. "Well, I'll tell you why," the actor said. "Because the best actress this year was Mikey Madison for 'Onora' at the Oscars and I don't see anybody discussing her vulva, which is on screen all the time."

While he's correct that Madison did not talk about her genitalia on the Anora press circuit, but nudity and sex were frequent topics in conversations in her interviews. "I think it's quite interesting that there's a double standard for men," Isaacs continued. "Oh no." Margaret Qualley as well in The Substance. Nobody would dream of talking to her about her genitalia or her nipples or any of those things. So it's odd that there's a double standard. Meanwhile,

Kweli openly discussed that she wore prosthetic breasts and she frequently talked about these nude scenes alongside Demi Moore while promoting the substance. I've seen those interviews myself. It's difficult in a room when someone says something's happening to question it. Like he says it as though it's absolutely real. Like, well, there's a double standard. You can ask about men's prosthetics, but not women's. Like we haven't objectified women like since the beginning of time and politicized their bodies.

After this cock-hungry panel of Gayle King and co. noted that Isaac sounded like he was trying to dodge the question, the actor responded, it is a dodge because I don't really think that people want to know how the sausage is made. I genuinely think it would be odd when there are characters, some women are naked in here, it'd be odd if they were sitting here. You would never dream of discussing their genitalia, not for a second. With one of King's hosts noticing, I think if prosthetics were standard with actresses, we would ask,

and then moved on to other topics. This guy, and I like Jason Isaacs, I like Liverpool. I don't really know this guy as a person, but I think he's a great actor and I love the White Lotus. And there is a scene where he moves his legs, he's taken his wife's sleeping pills or like opiate medication that a lot of rich American women seem to be on, and he opens his legs and this like big dick flops out. Well, people are going to notice because it wasn't just like a regular penis.

And he just wants to leave a little, you know, he's acting righteous about it. Like you would never ask a woman about her body. Oh, really? Because I'm pretty sure that we have objectified women, done like rear of the year, had like countdowns to people turning 18. Everything is about women's bodies. There are governments that continue to control what women do with their bodies. Show me a country where that's the same for men. And he just kind of wants people to think that that big dick is really his.

but it's not. It's not going to be. It is a prosthetic. I'll let you know, Gail King. I'm an expert in this area. The long-awaited live adaptation of Disney's Snow White has been released, and it's serving up more than a few poisoned apples. You might say that the people at Disney are not exactly whistling while they work on promoting this film. It actually appears like the studio is full-on running away from it. The 207th

million dollar musical fantasy it's 450 million if you include prints and advertising costs was mired in controversy from the jump and disney saw this controversy coming when it reopened its renamed snow white's enchanted wash ride at disneyland in 2021 it was hit with criticism that the upgraded experience still included prince charming kissing a sleeping snow white so without her consent the

The kiss was one of true love, not lust, because the prince thought she was dead, it was explained. Not sure, oh, he thinks he's committing first base necrophilia, makes it any better, but I digress. Still, the studio pushed ahead with a source saying, from the beginning, Snow White had red flags waving. A whiter than white heroine at a time when Hollywood's moving away from that. Rescued by Prince Charming, when that's a chauvinist trope. Seven dwarves, when the word dwarf means

It's controversial. It's not like any of this crept up on Disney unawares, but Snow White is also the classic of classics. It is to animation what Hamlet is to theater. Screenwriter Erin Cressida Wilson said the 1937 classic had been gently fleshed out for a more contemporary audience and that she had massaged the theme of her discovering and trusting her own voice and her own purpose with compassion and strength.

Enter its two stars, Colombian-Polish Rachel Zegler as Snow White and Israeli Gal Gadot as the Evil Queen, who beyond apparently having as warm an on-off-screen relationship as Snow White and the Evil Queen, both recently made lightning rod statements at either end of the spectrum. Zegler, for her pro-Palestine support and a wish that, quote, Trump supporters never know peace,

And Gal Gadot, a former Israeli military member for her staunch pro-Israel sentiment. This might explain why no press junket has been allowed within 100 miles of either star for a promotional junket. All of this before we even get to the CGI dwarves.

Peter Dinklage, who has a form of dwarfism called achondroplasia, questioned why the characters were included while Snow White was cast diversely. It makes no sense to me. You're progressive in one way, but then you're still making that fucking backward story about seven dwarves living in a cave together. But I would say that is part of the story. I am not someone who has dwarfism, so I shouldn't speak on it. But like as an outsider, can I just ask the question,

The original 1937 story was about a queen, an evil queen, who was obsessed with beauty, who enslaved this child. And then the child went out in the woods, could speak to animals, met these dwarves, fell asleep, was kissed and rescued by a prince without her consent. So like it's, you know, it's 1937. Let's be just grateful it wasn't much worse than that because it absolutely could have been worse.

and Peter Dinklage really saying like, "Oh, don't use dwarves." What about all these actors like Peter Dinklage who have dwarfism and who might be waiting for an opportunity like this?

Because maybe they're shut out of other roles. Maybe that's getting better now, but historically they would have been presumably shut out from other roles. And they think maybe one day they'll make a live action Snow White and I'll be able to do a lot with the grumpy character. And like, it'll really be my breakout role. I feel like Peter Dinklage in this case is kind of gatekeeping. He's like, I am the only famous actor with dwarfism. Like, what is he doing? And maybe it's a lot, but I would just hope that if Peter Dinklage is going to shut this down, then he's doing a lot.

a lot to amplify and platform other actors with dwarfism in his industry. And maybe he's doing something like that, but I don't know. Because I'm very busy. Why don't we just make new shit? Can we make some new shit instead of remakes of all of these very problematic stories?

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That's all the time we have for today. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of Telling Everybody Everything. I am on tour. A lot of people already know that. Tickets are mostly sold out, but there are some areas. I'm looking at you, Sunderland. I'm looking at you, Grimsby. Maybe they just aren't my people, though I did think that I was beloved in the North, so that is hurtful.

I don't think I'm there until May or June, but I think that my touring company would feel more comfortable if you purchase the tickets now, but I don't really care what you do. You're welcome to come if you like.

i'm at the palladium for three more nights in april that is a tremendous night out if you live in london or if you're just traveling into london you can have dinner in soho you can do a bunch of fun things i absolutely love seeing things at the palladium chelsea handler is at the palladium soon and sarah silverman is at the palladium on april 28th which is a monday so even maybe i can go if i live that long and then i'm back at the palladium in may and they haven't announced that yet

And I don't understand a lot. I mean, I have been explained the logic of that. They want to make sure they sell all the April dates first, and then they're going to officially announce the Palladium in May on March 31st. And then they're going to officially put the tickets for the Palladium in May, April 4th. But I don't really subscribe to these schedules, so I'm just telling you now.

Because maybe you're in London in May, but you're not in London in April. So anyway, please look after each other. And actually, we've learned this week, look after your damn self. Because no one else will. A doctor will just let you die. I saw a doctor on TikTok.

I've just been on a lot of TikTok. And she was like, here's why I had two elective C-sections, or it was called like a maternal choice C-section, which means she wanted to have C-sections for her babies, but there was no medical reason for her to have C-sections for her babies. And I looked at this woman like, are you a fucking idiot? Because...

How can a medical doctor, like some people have to have a C-section and that's great. And C-sections save lives and they can be really traumatic for people. Some people like them. I personally have a friend who has elected to have two C-sections, but one of them, her baby was breached. So they could have tried to turn it, but in the end she was like, it's a huge baby. It's breached. I'm having a C-section. And she loved the experience, but she has never given birth the other way before.

And like you are cut like it's a serious surgery and then they give you a human to look after when you've just had major abdominal surgery. So like as a doctor, especially it would not be my first point of call. It's just I have lost so much faith. So you know your body better than anyone else knows your body.

So please look after yourself. Thank you so much for listening. If you ever want to write me an email, we didn't do any of the emails today. And that's Joanne's fault. I'll be honest. Joanne is probably traumatized because we did have a death in the family this week. Someone that she was really close to. But I really protect myself by not being close to anyone. It is very sad, though. It was a really wonderful woman in my family. So maybe that's why...

Joanne's asleep at the wheel. But if you want to write me an email, it's telling everybody everything at gmail.com or you could send your condolences to Joanne on there as well. Please look after each other. I'll see you soon.

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