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cover of episode Carrie Coon on What Being Worthy of Love Really Means

Carrie Coon on What Being Worthy of Love Really Means

2025/2/26
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Modern Love

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Anna Martin
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Carrie Coon
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Carrie Coon: 我在电影《他三个女儿》中饰演的角色凯蒂,对她的姐妹们以及她们的能力有着僵化的想法,这阻碍了她们之间真正的联系和关爱。家庭成员之间对同一事件的看法可能大相径庭,因为他们看待彼此的方式仍然停留在过去。我们常常将自己对家人的既定印象投射到他们身上,而忽略了去了解他们此刻真实的自我。我曾经认为自己情感受损,无法像社会期望的那样去爱,实际上是因为我缺乏自我价值感,认为自己不配被爱。我曾努力让自己对他人有用,以此获得爱,但这导致我忽略了自己的需求,并产生怨恨。我祖母的信点醒了我:怜悯不等同于爱,我不应该通过隐瞒信息来“成全”别人,而应让他们自己做出选择。与丈夫相遇后,我意识到自己值得被爱,而我的行为并不代表我的全部。爱既是与生俱来的,也是后天学习的,两者兼而有之。 Anna Martin: 电影《他三个女儿》中,凯蒂这个角色对她的姐妹们以及她们的能力有着僵化的想法,这阻碍了她们之间真正的联系和关爱。Harriet Brown的现代爱情随笔中,作者从小被母亲告知冷漠无情,长期以来她都相信母亲的评价。

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In the movie “His Three Daughters,” Carrie Coon’s character, Katie, has rigid ideas about who her sisters are and what they’re capable of. When the women reunite to care for their dying father, those ideas become a barrier to true connection and care for each other.

In this episode, Coon reads the Modern Love essay “A Family Label, Ungarbled)” by Harriet Brown. Growing up, the author was never sure she could feel real love. It took breaking out of her mother’s ideas of her, and the birth of her daughter, to learn what love meant. Coon relates the essay to her own experience, describing her early dating life as tumultuous and recalling relationships she continued out of pity rather than love. Until one day, Coon got a letter from her grandmother that changed everything.

Here’s how to submit a Modern Love essay to The New York Times)

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