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cover of episode Hank Azaria’s Advice for Overcoming Codependency

Hank Azaria’s Advice for Overcoming Codependency

2025/1/15
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Modern Love
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我年轻时会过度使用角色扮演来取悦他人，这会影响到我与他人的真实连接。我曾经通过扮演不同的角色来逃避真实的自我，这是一种依赖性行为。我年轻时渴望成为别人，而不是真实的自己，这导致我沉迷于扮演不同的角色。我曾经不相信真实的自己会被人接受，所以一直隐藏真实的自我。我学会了独处，并了解自己的喜好，从而找到真实的自我。讨好他人会导致怨恨积累，最终损害自我。我将这种讨好行为比作“契约”和“凌乱的房间”，前者是逃避自我问题的妥协，后者是需要清理的负面情绪。要克服讨好型人格，需要学习表达自己的需求，并为自身发声。为了找到真实的自己，我经历了一段“无热恋”时期，专注于了解自己真正的喜好和需求。找到真实的自己后，才能吸引与自己真正契合的人。自我提升是一个持续的过程，即使在找到合适的伴侣后，也需要不断努力。整合自我的关键在于拥有一个精神寄托，能够诚实地面对自己，并对自己的行为负责。克服依赖性后，我能够与他人建立更真实的连接，这是一种难以言喻的满足感。真正的“更高的力量”是建立在真实基础上的与他人的连接。持续的自我提升和与伴侣的共同努力，是维系良好关系的关键。在婚姻中，持续的沟通和互相支持，能够帮助双方更好地应对生活中的挑战。

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This chapter introduces Hank Azaria, a renowned actor known for his voice work on "The Simpsons," and explores his early life experiences of using humor and acting as coping mechanisms. It sets the stage for his journey towards self-discovery and overcoming codependency.
  • Hank Azaria's prolific acting career, including voice acting for "The Simpsons"
  • His use of humor and acting as a way to avoid being himself
  • His five devastating heartbreaks that led him to seek self-discovery

Shownotes Transcript

Hank Azaria is used to putting on other personalities. You probably know him best from his work as a voice actor on “The Simpsons,” where he plays Moe the bartender, Professor Frink, Chief Wiggum and Snake Jailbird, among many others. His list of credits in stage plays, movies and TV shows is prolific, including roles like his Tony-nominated performance in “Spamalot,” Phoebe’s boyfriend on “Friends” and the dog walker on “Mad About You.” But at a certain point in his life, Azaria realized that he was using humor and acting to be anyone but himself, and that it was affecting his real-life relationships. After five devastating heartbreaks, he resolved to look inward, address his codependency issues and become his most authentic self.

In this episode, Azaria tells us how he found authenticity and reads the Modern Love essay “In Defense of My Emu Tattoo),” about an author who masks his true self by using humor but eventually finds love by learning to be himself.

How to submit a Modern Love Essay to The New York Times)

How to submit a Tiny Love Story)

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