cover of episode Ep502 - Kasley Killam | The Art & Science of Connection

Ep502 - Kasley Killam | The Art & Science of Connection

2024/11/26
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Rachel: 本期节目邀请社会健康专家 Kasley Killam 讨论其著作《连接的艺术与科学》,该书强调了社会联系对整体健康的重要性,并提供了一种获得社会健康的方法。它弥补了传统健康建议中忽略的社会联系这一重要因素,认为人际关系如同肌肉一样可以锻炼,加强社会联系可以提升整体健康水平。 Darby White: Kasley Killam 的书《连接的艺术与科学》不仅关注身心健康,也强调社会健康的重要性,并提供可操作的建议。它直面孤独流行病,鼓励我们重新定义幸福,不仅是身体和精神上的,也是社会上的。 Kasley Killam: 作者通过108天行善的实验,亲身体验到人际连接对身心健康和学业成绩的积极影响。传统健康观念忽略了人际连接的重要性,社会健康是整体健康的重要组成部分,缺乏连接会增加多种疾病风险,而社会健康危机需要个人和社会共同应对。健康观念的演变,从关注生理健康到心理健康,下一步应该认识到社会健康的重要性,将人际连接视为生活的重要组成部分。社会健康是独立于身心健康的第三个健康维度,如同身体和心理健康一样重要,需要被重视和培养。提升社会健康的三步法:评估现有社交关系,确定策略(伸展、休息、强化、展现),并采取行动。即使时间紧迫,简单的社交互动也能带来积极影响,例如发短信问候朋友。每个人都可以通过简单的善举来提升自身和社区的社会健康水平,即使是小举动也能产生积极的连锁反应。Social Health Labs 通过微型拨款支持社区建设者改善当地社会健康,例如通过蝴蝶栖息地项目促进代际联系。社交媒体对社会健康的影响取决于使用方式,积极主动的使用方式有利于拓展社交圈,而消极被动的方式则可能导致负面情绪。AI 伴侣可以作为补充而非替代品,过度依赖 AI 伴侣可能会损害社会健康,需要在技术设计和社会文化层面共同努力,促进社会健康。内向者也可以通过积极主动的方式提升社会健康,即使是简单的互动也能带来积极影响。5-3-1 原则是一个社交健康的指导方针,并非严格的规则,具体实施需要根据个人情况进行调整。并非所有的人际关系都是积极的,需要辨别并维护健康的人际关系,并设置界限。应对拒绝需要建立韧性,而积极的支持能够帮助孩子克服拒绝带来的负面影响。平衡一对一和群体社交需要根据个人感受进行调整,并进行自我观察和分析。手机和社交媒体对人际关系的影响取决于使用方式,需要有意识地控制使用时间,并注重人际互动。参加陌生人聚会可能会导致精疲力尽,建议选择基于共同兴趣的活动来促进社交。建立社交自信需要克服社交焦虑,并相信他人对自己的好感往往高于自身预期。社会健康的重要性,以及通过简单的行动来提升自身和社会整体的社会健康水平。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

Why is social health considered as important as physical and mental health, and what does it entail?

Social health is as important as physical and mental health because it significantly influences longevity, health, and happiness. It involves cultivating bonds with family, friends, and community, feeling supported, valued, and loved. Decades of research show that connection is essential for well-being, yet it is often overlooked in mainstream health advice.

Why did Kasley Killam conduct a 108-day experiment of acts of kindness, and what were the outcomes?

Kasley conducted a 108-day experiment of acts of kindness to apply research on human connection in her life. The outcomes included increased happiness, energy, better academic performance, and deeper relationships. She realized the abundance of opportunities for meaningful connection and the positive impact on her overall well-being.

What are the key strategies for improving social health according to Kasley Killam's book?

The key strategies for improving social health are: 1) Stretch your social muscles by making more friends and joining new communities. 2) Rest your social muscles by giving yourself alone time. 3) Tone your social muscles by deepening existing relationships. 4) Flex your social muscles by enjoying and sustaining strong connections.

Why is technology, particularly social media, a double-edged sword for social health?

Technology and social media can be beneficial for social health when used to connect with others, find new communities, and maintain relationships. However, they can be detrimental when used passively, leading to loneliness, anxiety, and social comparison. The key is to use technology intentionally and mindfully.

How can introverts build their social health without feeling overwhelmed?

Introverts can build social health by finding a balance between connection and solitude. Engaging in activities they enjoy with others, such as joining a hobby group, can reduce pressure and make social interactions more enjoyable. Small, intentional steps, like reaching out to one person a day, can also be beneficial without feeling overwhelming.

What is the 5-3-1 guideline for social health, and how can it be personalized?

The 5-3-1 guideline suggests aiming to connect with five different people each week, maintaining at least three close relationships, and spending one hour a day connecting. It serves as a benchmark, but individuals can adjust these numbers based on their personal preferences and needs. The guideline helps anchor actions and explore what works best for each person.

Why is it important to set boundaries in social interactions, and how can they benefit social health?

Setting boundaries in social interactions is important because not all connections are beneficial. Some relationships can be toxic or draining, and letting go of them can improve overall social health. Recognizing and maintaining healthy boundaries ensures that time and energy are invested in nourishing relationships.

How can social media and phone usage impact in-person connections, and what is the role of intention in this context?

Social media and phone usage can lead to disconnection from people in front of us, as we often look down at our screens. Intention plays a crucial role in balancing screen time and in-person interactions. Being mindful and intentional about how and when we use technology can help maintain strong, meaningful connections with those around us.

Chapters
This chapter introduces Kasley Killam, a Harvard-trained social scientist, and her book, "The Art and Science of Connection." It highlights the importance of social health as a vital component of overall well-being, often overlooked in traditional wellness advice. The chapter sets the stage for a discussion on how human connection is essential for a healthier life.
  • Kasley Killam's expertise in social health.
  • The book "The Art and Science of Connection" addresses the loneliness epidemic.
  • Social health is presented as a vital component of overall well-being, alongside physical and mental health.

Shownotes Transcript

Social health expert Kasley Killam visits Google to discuss her book “The Art and Science of Connection.” Weaving together cutting-edge science, mindset shifts, and practical wisdom, Kasley offers a methodology for how to be socially healthy. Her book is an antidote to the loneliness epidemic and an inspiring manifesto for seeing wellbeing as not only physical and mental, but also social.

Exercise. Eat a balanced diet. Go to therapy. Most wellness advice is focused on achieving and maintaining good physical and mental health. But Harvard-trained social scientist and pioneering social health expert Kasley Killam reveals that this approach is missing a vital component: human connection.

Just as we exercise our physical muscles, we can strengthen our social muscles.

This book can transform the way you think about each interaction with a friend, family member, coworker, or neighbor, and give you the tools you need to live a more connected and healthy life—whether you are an introvert or extrovert, if you feel stretched thin, and no matter your age or background. Along the way, Killam will reveal how a university student, a newlywed, a working professional, and a retired widow overcame challenges to thrive through connection—and how you can, too.

Visit http://youtube.com/TalksAtGoogle/) to watch the video.