Why people are ‘swiping right’ on matchmakers in South Korea
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Hey everyone, today we're talking love, relationships and dating. We've all been there. You're looking for the love of your life and not quite finding the right match. Some people turn to dating apps or you might be the type of person who prefers to approach someone in real life. Others might look to a professional matchmaker. And that's what's happening in South Korea where matchmaking services are on the rise.

So why is that? In this episode, we're going to find out. I'm Mitkri Farooq and this is What's in the World from the BBC World Service. ♪

So I'm joined by Rachel Lee, who's a BBC journalist based in Seoul. Hey, Rachel. Hi. So let's get straight into it, Rachel. I'm young, I'm single in Korea, and, you know, there's a lot going for me in my life, but I'm just missing a husband. I really want one. And I come across these matchmaking agencies.

What are they going to do for me? What's involved? Right. So the matchmaking agency is pretty common in Korea, I have to admit. So it's actually considered a more traditional way to meet a partner. So they range from standard ones anyone can join to high-end agencies that carefully screen your profile before letting you register. So it's quite structured.

So while some might see it as old-fashioned, these agencies have adopted to modern needs, now blending tradition with convenience. Interesting. And compared to dating apps, obviously one of the main methods a lot of people around the world are using to find love. How does this compare? Are dating apps still used as much or are matchmaking agencies taking over in Korea? Well, to be honest, dating apps aren't that popular in Korea because...

I think Korean people are more into verifying people and they need to have these verification processes, a very careful one. So these matchmaking agencies, once you sign up, they evaluate a lot of details about you.

online often talk about this screening process a lot. Some think it's fair while others feel that it's just too much. So you have to fill out a form with personal information like your

job or monthly income your parents job even your family's financial status and where you went to university so it's quite you know it could feel kind of cold so education is a big deal in korea and graduating from a university in seoul city which is the capital of south korea is seen as a proof that you worked hard in school and after you submit this whole form

The agency classifies you into a grade. So for example, if you're a doctor, you're likely to be at the top tier for occupation category. And if you work for a big corporation, you'll probably be graded below that. And once that grading is all done, a matchmaker sets you up on dates with people of similar profiles or specific traits you've requested.

And if you don't find a match, you can either pay for additional setups or just cancel your membership. But of course, not every agency is this formal or structured, but many follow this approach to make sure the matches are compatible. Wow. Talking about grades when it comes to love, that sounds so formal. And how much does it cost?

So fees range from $1,400 to $7,000. Okay, so pretty expensive. Do we know if more people are turning to these services and if they are, why? Right, so marriage matchmaking agencies in South Korea are definitely booming.

So there are nearly 1,000 operating across the country as of 2024, and many of them have hit record sales. So I was talking to a matchmaker, and he told me that COVID played a big role in boosting demand of these agencies. So during the pandemic, people were stuck at home, they couldn't go to social gatherings, and they found it hard to

meet anyone new. So after that, matchmaking agencies became a solution, saving time and energy. And after COVID, the industry, the insider told me, saw a 40% increase in sales. And some major agencies even hit all-time highs in recent years.

And this trend hasn't slowed down as people still want a more efficient way to find the one. And Rachel, I wanted to talk a bit about your personal experience. Are you single? Right. Yes, I am single. So would you ever use a matchmaking service? Have you used one before? No.

Well, I've never used one because, well, marriage is not my top priority right now. But talking to all these clients of matchmaking agencies, I felt like maybe if I don't, if I fail to find a good partner, I might sign up. Okay, so you might not be using a matchmaker right now, but you've been speaking to people who are like 31-year-old Anna. So let's hear why she uses them. So...

As I'm like working hard, I've spent so much time focusing on my work. So now I feel like I want to get married and find someone special. But now I've been so focused on my work, I don't have much time to actually look for someone. So yes, I've asked my friends to look for some people and then ask questions.

them to go out but has come harder and harder because my friends are also busy working so they only meet like limited number of people so they have less people to introduce to each other a lot of people go on like different social activities like meetings to look for someone not specifically to look for someone but they go for like sports and find someone but that also was hard because

I've been so busy with my work, so that means I have to spend extra time and maybe some money too. And then I'm not even sure that I will meet someone. So I didn't want to waste my time and money for not knowing what's going to happen. And we couldn't let you go, Anna, without asking what you're looking for in a partner. Love, of course. I don't want to give out those like,

Those words, but I think it always comes to the basic, like family, love, loyalty. Yeah. And Rachel, what else have people been telling you?

Right. So I met a married couple who met through an agency and they said there were challenges. And for one, some people think it's still embarrassing to use these services, which actually made it hard for me to get interviewees to go on camera. So they didn't want to be seen as clients of a matchmaking agency because, you know, there's this perception that it's for people who only care about things like money and social status and

And also a teacher too. She told me it just felt like an assignment and it wasn't romantic. Okay, so a mixed bag from Korea. But what about around the world? So we have people from all over the world here at the BBC HQ. And I ran around and asked a few of them if they would use a matchmaking service. Hey, I'm Bella. I'm from Sydney in Australia. I think a matchmaking service...

It's a fascinating idea, but I've watched so much reality TV that I have no faith whatsoever in a matchmaking service being successful because it just seems like how is it possible to pair people based on, you know, the metrics they use? It doesn't even make sense to me. I'm a total non-believer. LAUGHTER

Yeah, my name is Robert and I'm from Burundi. Would you give the matchmaking service a go? As a last resort, I would try the traditional way first and then if it does the work, I would probably consider it.

When you say the traditional way, what is that for you? Yeah, meet a girl on the street, chat her up or in a, I don't know, in a shopping centre or a bus. Anywhere we meet people, just talk to them. You never know. Hi, I'm Shea. I'm from Southampton on the south coast of the UK and I'm 29. Yeah, I think I would do it. If I trusted the matchmaker, why not? Hi, my name's Amir. Tell me, you said you wouldn't use a matchmaking service, so why not? I don't know. I like to organically meet people, I guess. I don't want to be...

matched together. So what is your ideal way to meet someone? Are you thinking location? I'm trying to think. My ideal way? I don't know. Social media DMs maybe. That might be the ideal way. I don't know. I don't meet people in real life. It's too awkward.

So Rachel, back to you in Korea. When it comes to the dates that matchmakers there set up, are they tailored to each person or could you have a random activity date? What happens?

Well, for dates, it's well known that the couple matcher actually tells her clients what to do, like what to talk about. Or sometimes they even make a reservation for a restaurant that they could go to. So there was this one couple who I met and they ended up getting married after meeting through marriage matching agency. And they told me that their couple matcher actually

made a reservation for them on their first date you know the couple matcher would send the whole profile like a brief profile about who they are planned to meet so there's going to be their occupation there's going to be their age and the whole thing so they could actually prepare like what to talk about because it all it also includes like hobby and stuff like that

So it's basically a couple matches doing their job. And local governments have also been promoting these services, right? How has that gone down?

Right. So, well, matchmaking agencies are run by private sector. And now, as you said, local governments are also stepping in to help connect young people. So they've started organizing speed dating events for these young residents in their cities. So I went to one of these events in Seongnam City, which is near capital city of Seoul, and it brought together 100 participants, so 50 men and 50 women,

all hoping to meet someone new. And I spoke to the mayor of Seongnam who said that South Korea has tried all sorts of measures to tackle the declining marriage and birth rates, but most haven't worked. So these events, however, seem to be helping young people connect and have become quite popular, according to the mayor.

We know the pursuit of love is never easy, but it sounds like there's a lot of different options there, especially for young people in Korea. Thank you so much for joining us, Rachel. Thank you for having me. Thank you.

One of the reasons that local governments are promoting matchmaking agencies is, as Rachel mentioned, to boost South Korea's birth rate, which is currently at record lows. And we've actually done another episode all about that called Why Don't South Koreans Want to Have Kids? And you can find that wherever you get your BBC podcasts. And that's it for today. Thank you so much for joining us. As always, we'll be back with another episode soon. See you then. Bye.

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