Ask, Tell, Confess : Best Of
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Ask, Tell, Confess. Ask, Tell, Confess. Hey guys, it's Mimi. We hope you guys are having the best holiday season. Here is some of our favorite Ask, Tell, Confesses from 2024. Hello friends. Welcome to another Ask, Tell, Confess. I can't wait. I can't wait. Wait, Jaime joining in. Hi.

is what killed me that is so funny dude i'm looking at you guys doing it and then i fucking hear the whistle out of it that in my left ear and i look over and it's high may just in the microphone i saw my chance i took it well today we have our plates full with the ass talking fest you guys really delivered if you're on my patreon

You always get a chance to be a part of these weekly segments and you guys are allowed to ask, tell or confess. And you guys did not disappoint this week. I was 19, just graduated school and was celebrating with a group of friends. I was sleeping with a guy in the friend group. Nothing serious, just fun. I forgot I started my period. I even forgot I had a tampon in me and said fun buddy...

go ahead, proceed to have fun. And let's just say I went home after and me and my friends spent a good 40 minutes looking for this tampon that was lodged inside of me. Now, every time I have sex, even six years later, I still get scared for half a second thinking I have a tampon and I don't even wear tampons anymore. Bro. I've done it before. What? I never told you about this. Maybe, but like, maybe not. Let me know. When I did wear tampons, you know, I was always in a constant relationship. My sex life was

extremely active. There was one time that me and my ex had sex. We had gotten really fucked up. I wake up the next day, don't think anything about it, but like a week later, right? I'm going to the bathroom and I'm like, and I lean over and I'm like, Ooh, that does not smell right. And I am like, when I'm crazy about how I smell. So like my, my vagina is like pristine always. So if there's just even a hint of a smell, I know something's wrong. I'm like, all right, I got to go to the doctor. I'm like, this motherfucker gave me something. I'm thinking he

you know, my ex gave me a fucking STD or something. They do the exam, they look in there, they're like, "Everything's fine. Maybe you just have an infection. Let's give you, you don't have any STDs. Let's just give you an antibiotic." This is a gynecologist after looking in my vagina and fucking poking around in there, right? The smell was still lingering. I mean, we're two weeks in on this process here, right? One day I sit down on the toilet to take a dump and I'm pushing out. And as I push out, I hear,

And something like a suction cup falls out of my vagina into the fucking toilet. Right. And I get up and I turn around and I look, it's a fucking tampon that had been sitting in me for two weeks. The fuck? Two weeks. Look on Jaime's face right now. And it went and everything was fine. As soon as it came out, my vagina smelled great again. I was back in action and you know, but I mean, it's normal. I have, you never got it. Where was it?

that a gynecologist was not able to spread you open and be like, there's the issue. Well, I do have in his defense and their defense. I do. I don't remember if it was a girl or a guy. Um, I do have a tilted uterus. Oh, same. So that could have been why they couldn't find it. If you were to strip to a jelly roll song, which song would it be? Oh, for the love of God. When would you do it to off the new album? Yes. Okay. Okay.

Off the new album, it would be the new song that he has with Russ. Really Gone? I would do this one. Because this is like OG Jelly Roll. Daddy goes off on it, right? What? Okay, I can hear this one as well. Wait till the beat drops. Around the pole. Here we go. Ladies, get ready. This is your new song to dance to on stage. This is the pole dance.

Okay, yeah. Yep. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Clap them cheeks, girl. I hope he sees this. I know. We'll clip it. We have to clip this. And then my next choice would probably either be woman because that's...

a song that he wrote about. It's like, that's the Sarah McLachlan of this album. Who dances to nothing but fast music? You gotta be sexy. Oh, I guess I'm at the wrong club. Yeah, you're going to the, you're going to the, which clubs are you at? The Ratchet ones. Those are my favorite. Or maybe Devil Down. Could you see me getting up there in some boots to this? He'd be like, Devil Down.

Oh yeah. Yeah. The poles are here. He's just doing that one quad hopper move that I do. Here we go. Oh, that's good. All right. Go buy jelly rolls, a new album.

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Behind the bright lights and adrenaline of pro sports is an equally exciting world of negotiations and deal-making. That's what we cover each week on our podcast, The Deal. I'm Alex Rodriguez, former baseball player turned business executive. And I'm Jason Kelly, chief correspondent for Bloomberg Originals. Over the next couple months, we'll hear from all-stars like Jay Williams. I want to be an owner one day. Billie Jean King. Learn the business. And so many more. Listen to The Deal wherever you get your podcasts.

I dated a guy in college. I was at his place and I had to take a shit. I go in, do my thing, and there is a plastic knife on the end of a string hanging on the side of the toilet. What the fuck? I finish up. I come out and I ask the guy, what's up with that fucking weirdly placed knife? His roommate takes shit so big he has to chop them into smaller poops. I'm just kidding.

I'm jealous. She goes, he's a poo chef. Okay, first of all, what is this man's diet? I need it. I'm jealous. Just save the knife.

But they use the same knife over and over. I mean, there's so many questions I have. How do you discover that you need to chop your turds? What toilet does it? I guess it kept getting stuck. What is he eating? Is it solid? Like it just won't break in half when you flush? It's just giant logs and he has to cut them into smaller poops. Timber. Jaime, why did you disagree with that? I've never had that issue, but I have heard men talk about, they call it a big fish. Sting.

- Stop. - When it doesn't flush and it kind of S's halfway into the water, halfway out of the water. Yeah, you gotta top it up. - I wish I could have one come out of the water. I didn't even know this was a pot. Have you had one come out of the water? Jealous. - This question's for Haley. How was it kissing Bunny? She sucked your bottom lip in the video. - I did. - Did you? - Kind of blacked out.

First of all, I know you guys have heard us talk about Haley's fucking gaitum. It's like, yeah. There's a whole lore to her gaitum. And one minute she'll walk by me on the bus. I don't have a bra on. She will full on grab a titty. Oh, no problem. She'll fucking try to swipe my hoot. If I walk past her and she's naked, she'll back up into it. She just backed up into me before we got here.

we got here and she tries to act like she doesn't like it and it's like bitch please i asked her today because when i was rubbing her titty when she was doing my makeup i was like did you miss me she's like actually yeah it's okay when i do it i gotta initiate it but if someone gets too close to me i can't you oh yeah we're holding hands by the way i know i'm like what are you talking about as you guys are holding hands on the couch she's over there talking shit yeah i'm not i'm not gay at all okay so

So do you guys see how she plays this little role? It's going to take the right person just to flip that switch and it's either going to be good or bad. Either she's never going to joke around again or someone's going to turn her. I want to hook up with one. You know which one I'm talking about. Girl? Yeah. No, no, no. Bump them clams, baby. Clam bumping. Muff diving. Yeah.

I'm going to close up shop. Oh, don't sew it up. It's like a Venus flytrap. It was like the Iron Curtains the other day. When it opens, it's like, rawr. But then when she gets all scared, it's like, clamps closed. Oh, no, not the predator mouth. Predator mouth pussy. Predator puss? Not the predator puss.

Can't do it. Can't do it. They had to send it in the DMs because she said, my fiance, after six years of dating, we love a grand old spicy time in the bedroom. Our sex life is no kind of boring. Well, after doing so much over the years, one day I was messing with him and I told him I wanted to eat his ass. Mm hmm.

Well, after months of joking around and fucking with him one night after a night out of drinking, he was like, fine, go ahead if you really want. So I took my shot and did it after hounding him for months. He had dried poop stuck in his hairy asshole and it ended up in my mouth and not appear. Hold on. I'm gagging.

out of pure embarrassment for me and him i just shut the fuck up and did my thing as nasty as that sounds disgusting at the time and wanted to bleach my face after but we joke about it and now i officially call him dingleberry swallow it

She said I wanted to bleach my face after. Okay. All right. There's so much here to unpack. Men, if you're going to have somebody eat your ass, at least baby wipe the motherfucker. Give it a dude wipe. Give it a little wipey wipe with the dipey dipe. Let's not have doo-doo balls encrusted in your fucking ass hairs and then make your fucking significant other have to eat that. Imagine her spitting them out like... Bitch. What do you mean?

When you get a piece of pepper stuck in your teeth? Uh...

- I could never, if there was doo-doo balls, I'm not doing it dude. Hey baby, let's have a shower and then eat his ass in the shower. There's a line that has to be done 'cause you can get sick. - You gotta eat buttholes though. - Sir, wipe your butthole better. - Why not? Have you ever had your butthole ate? - No, I don't like that. - Really? - You don't like anything. You are so petty. - That's where you shit, guys. - Tongue punch my fart box. - I mean, don't knock it till you try it.

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I recently joined your Patreon and went straight for top tier as I'm an all or nothing person, obsessive personality maybe.

My question is, how in the world do you maintain all of these social media platforms and things you are involved in doing? I'm sitting here a month in and thinking, damn, this is a lot. Also, what's the Utah timeline look like?

B Lawson. I love that. I love this because I try to tell everybody how much content we have on Patreon and I don't think people realize like whenever I do start putting shit on YouTube, I have years worth of shit that I can fucking put on YouTube, dude. And

Patreon is a testament of how hard we work. Like you guys don't really get to see it unless you're on our Patreon. There is so much shit on there. It is crazy, dude. Like, I mean, we're talking back to like 2020, right? 2020. Yeah. 2020. So like five years going on five years.

years of content. - That's crazy. - Crazy. So we started Patreon the same year that I started my OnlyFans. - Yeah, at the end of the year. So you started OnlyFans in the beginning of the year and then we started Patreon at the end of the year. - Yeah, so let's clarify to everybody really quick. Everybody's like, "Oh my God, you were in the sex industry. "You just retired a year ago." No, I retired from the sex industry five years ago. I have not had a sugar daddy in five years or fucking a client in five years.

And I started my only fans in 2020, which only lasted two years. I only had my only fans for two years and I retired from sex work online in 2020. Yes. So just so everybody, not 2020, 2022, sorry. I retired from sex work online.

in 2022. So for everybody who's like, what's the timeline? And you know, how long have you been retired? I've been retired from that lifestyle for half a decade now. Yeah. So, yeah. And like you weren't active even at the end of OF, you weren't like actively working it like you were in the beginning. The first year I shot like 200 movies and I just recycled them the entire fucking. Yeah. That's free game for you ladies, by the way.

Yeah, always stack content, guys. That even goes for social media. Like, I know they were asking about that. Just stack content. That's what you can't expect yourself to film all day, every day, throw some shit in the drafts, make a day of content, and you've got a week of content. Bubbles wants to confess, I have two baby daddies. I would be lying if I said I haven't thought of them doubling me down. Oh, you want to take a trip to Paris? No.

Oui, oui. Oui, oui. S'il vous plaît. S'il vous plaît. Parlez-vous français? I mean... Why don't you ask them? I think ask them. I kind of like it. Unless it's like one of those things where it's like they don't like each other because they're both the baby daddy. But if they're cool, like why wouldn't they? Purple Shots. I'm all for fulfilling fantasies, man. I've never... Have you been with two dudes? Have you ever been to Eiffel Tower? No.

It's never been one of my fantasies. It's too much dong. Like, where are you going to put that other one? One is enough. Where are you going to put that other thing? You know? Not the back door. I'm overstimulated, partner. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, get it away. I'm busy. Just slap it away while you're working on one. Yeah. Like, I just, it's too much. So I say, ask the baby daddies, man. What do you got to lose? They'll probably think you're insane, but at the same time.

You might be a little awkward after. You'll plant the seed and they might give it to you for Christmas. Yeah. Start at Halloween. Just make sure they use protection. Oh, God. Then you won't know whose baby it is. Oh, God. All right. That's a Maury show. Yeah. That's a freaking Maury show. Yeah, we'll see you on Maury.

Thank you.

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Oh my God. I can't wait to see her. All right. And I cannot say this person's name because this has to stay private. I am sure it's so gross. This is good. I'm hoping this is the correct way for a tell, but I must remain anonymous because I don't want to lose my job. I am a nurse who works in the operating room. We had a patient come in for a foreign object stuck in their rectum.

No, it on me. And they had to have it surgically removed. The entire staff was aware that the foreign object was a vibrator. But once it was removed, I said, that's a honey bunny vibrator. So, of course, I had to tell the entire OR staff all about you girls. The reason for this tell is because the patient asked for it back because they want to bring it to a meet and greet to get signed.

Girls, please do not sign any vibrators. You literally have no idea where they've been. Don't do that.

Don't ever do that. Don't do that. I don't want your little dookie stick. Okay. Do not bring dookie sticks to fricking. Was it in her butt or her vagina? It was in her butt. It was in her butt. Okay. I need to know how she got it up there. You don't put anything in there that doesn't have a stopper. What did you say? Send us a video. Yeah. Oh man. Do you remember the time we watched that girl shove a traffic cone inside of her? Yes. That was crazy. Oh, and the tentacle. Yeah. Remember that one time you made me watch that guy? Yeah.

We showed Jay too. Didn't you show Jay? Wait, what did the guy do? You made me watch that dude back into the one that was suctioned up to the wall. Oh, is that the guy that sent it to me on my OnlyFans? And because I had to see it, I had to share it with you. What? Guys used to send me the weirdest shit on my OnlyFans. Sorry, Bessio. I know Bessio is going to fucking probably make us cut this, but...

I did have an OnlyFans in my former life, okay? And in the DMs, I don't know why guys thought it would turn me on, but they would send me videos of them like backing into things. Oh, yeah. Like that's not my kink. If that's your kink, I love that for you. Go off shorty. But that's not my kink. And I was just, I mean, he was meh, meh, meh.

She said, if I had to see this, you have to see this. Yeah. But I didn't see this. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. So ladies, please. I love you guys. I love all of your orifices, all of your holes. I'll sign whatever you want me to sign, but I'm not signing something that's been in you. Okay. I'll do the little carpaccio around your butthole, whatever you want me to do, but not signing. I want the carpaccio. The frickin' carpaccio.

not signing something that you had to have dis dislodged out of you surgically surgically yeah i mean well at least we know they work i hope she had a good time i mean yeah did you like it worth the money yeah um but our vibrators work ladies and sex education don't put anything up there that doesn't have a stopper weren't they big yeah yeah okay

She was getting going off. Yeah. I mean, did it just suck it in? Well, what happens is one time Tasha was, was using anal beads and she'll tell you the story. She tells the story all the time, but she orgasmed while the anal beads were in her and it sucked them right up.

Yeah, they had to pull them out one by one. Bloop, bloop, bloop. Like, yeah, it was bad. So I guess there's some sort of like when your body, the muscles tense up, it just sucks whatever's in your hole in there. Like a vacuum. Yeah, yeah. I've never had it happen to me, but I've heard stories.