Ask, Tell, Confess: Hailee Tries FB Dating
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Hello. Come fast. How are you guys doing? We still haven't talked about Facebook dating. Oh. Speaking of Facebook. Yeah, take us on the Facebook. We were doing it. And this is a story that she's been saving. She saved all of us. She was like, I have information for all of you guys. Yeah, she wouldn't tell us while we were in hair and makeup. So our reactions to this are going to be genuine. So it better be fucking good.

So, we had a little thing. What was it? A few days ago where we were like, you should get on Facebook dating. Just see what's on there. We wanted to read the profiles, not make fun of, but read the profiles kind of like we did. We want to see what's out there. Yeah. We're browsing. Yeah. And I was like, I don't want to do it. So, I ended up doing it. And at first, it was just like...

guys just coming through realize it's because it was showing me all the hot guys that were not in Nashville. None of those. Well, cause you put a hundred mile difference. These were like 800 miles. Okay. It was just, it was just like a preview. Okay. So it sucked me in. I was like, you know what? I kind of like this. So I actually set up a profile. We did. Okay. We helped her set up a profile and,

In the kitchen. In the kitchen. We made a little profile for you. Yep, two days ago. What was your... Make a little profile for you. My bio said, I didn't want salmon. I said it four times. And that comes from Jaime. I didn't want salmon. I said it four times. Yeah, it's a stepbrother's quote. Stepbrothers. Okay. I didn't want salmon. I said it four times. Okay. Other than that, I had nothing about what I did.

Nothing. Okay. Had a few photos, had some Zach tops and suicide boys and some young Dolph has my music. That's it. Okay. Yeah. Suicide boys. Okay. Um, scrimmed elantious. So I was like, yeah, don't like this, whatever. Cause as soon as I match with someone, I'm like, okay, I'm already over it. But then I matched with someone who was actually cute and he messaged me first. Don't even remember what we said.

So I actually have been talking to him since then. What? Yes. Like all day talking. Actually really like him. Get the fuck out of here. What's his name? But don't not give me him any. Where is he from? He's from California. From California. Okay. Our humor is the same. He lives in California. No, he lives here. Oh, from here. He is like six three.

Big teddy bear, like, is in, he has, like, managed construction stuff, whatever. Blue collar, we manifested this. Yes. Perfect. And I'm telling you, we have the same humor, just, like, we have the same views on, like, everything. When's his birthday? August 6th, Leo.

Lee. Yep. Leo. Yep. Yep. Okay. Anyway, everything's going great. The last night, guys, I we FaceTimed for three hours. Had no makeup on. Who? Like I FaceTimed him with no makeup. That's insane. She would never come around us without me. Literally. Yeah. I FaceTimed him with no makeup for three hours.

And... Camera on your face? Yes. Because I point... When Jay FaceTimes me and I'm ugly, he gets the ceiling. No, no. On my face the whole time. Yeah. Whole time. And... So...

I don't know if you guys, I told you about the trend, like shoulder told the trend where like you FaceTime at some random dude. So I use my other phone and I was just testing out his humor and I put my phone on my other phone and it's some random guy just sitting there. And he literally, as soon as he answers, he puts the phone down so quick. I start busting up laughing. He goes, and I put it like back to me. He goes, yo Haley, what the fuck was that? That was wild. Like bro,

Bro, and that was the first time we ever spoke. Like, he immediately thought it was funny, humor, whatever. Like, we got along so well for this three hours. We talked about everything. Like, three hours is a long time. That's a long, that's a date. That's a date. I don't even feel like you or I talked for three hours. He's an hour ahead. So this was, like, so late at night for him. He got yelled at by his sister and his dad for being so loud on the phone, too. They came in, like, three times. So he lives with his parents. Yeah.

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Well, he's in Virginia right now visiting family. Okay. But that is one thing. He does live with his parents till June. How old is he? 24. He's younger. You're a cougar?

I guess so. He even called me that too. He called me that too. She's a puma. But he said he liked older women. I'm telling you, we had so much in common. All right. If he likes older women, he has mommy's issues. Where's his mom? Yeah. I don't know. But she's adorable. The way he described her is so cute. Okay. Okay. Also loved his sister. Like, I literally like felt like I would fit in perfect with his family too. Okay. Okay.

And we even planned a date for this Wednesday because he comes back today. We planned a date for Wednesday. Just going to like a little dive bar, like one of his normal like spots he goes to. You're not taking me to Good Night Nashville? Does he know who you are? No.

Are you sure? Does he follow you on Instagram? No. Like, this is literally day two of talking. He only knew my first name. Got you. Nothing. Okay. And I have not told him what I do. Like, he asked on the phone what I do. And I just said makeup. That's it. I left it at that. Yeah. And then...

So yeah, we made plans, okay? We have a date Wednesday. Dude, if she fucking falls in love off Facebook, marketplace. Off of you making a joke profile, bro. I know. And then like, even like,

He would like he asked how short I were, my height. I said I'm five three. He's like, oh, my God, I'm a foot taller than you. I love it. Blah, blah, blah. He said he used to be like 400 pounds. He's lost like 100 pounds twice. He loves a thick woman, like literally said that, like literally like like so respectable, too. You can. Can we see a picture? Yeah, you can. Can we not show it on the pod? Of course. Hold on. Let me get my bifocals on.

Yeah, has he sent you a dick pic yet? No. Don't have his dick. Are you going to be picky about that, though? Because you are a size queen. I don't care, really. Unless it's like a belly button. Let me see. I need to investigate. Put it on the screen. I need to examine his face. He sent me this. Is there a video? Can I see his mannerisms or his energy? I don't have a video, but he acts...

Kind of like Jaime. Aww. Not going to lie. He has the same kind of mannerisms as Jaime. Leo men are fun. He taught, his voice sounds like Zachrific. And I told him that and he knew who that was. He has blue eyes. This is him just laying down sending me a selfie. That is so your type too, Haley. He's got a good hairline. Yeah. He's half Mexican. He's got a great hairline. Half Mexican. Blue eyes. He's got a chiseled jaw. He's got earrings. Yep. You know. Have we seen him when he's standing up?

You said 6'3"? I have this one. Can you look? Do you know any of his social medias? Yeah, found it. He's on the left. Aw, he's cute. He's totally my type. Tattoos. Totally your type. Okay. Is there any more pictures? Show us more pictures. What's that one below? Not that one. There was one where he's like shirtless in the bathroom. Let's see that one. Oh, I got his last name now. Him and his niece. I don't see shirtless in the bathroom. He does not look 24. That's someone's uncle.

That's all I got. That looks like two different people though. Doesn't it? Like go back to the one, the one of him in the beanie. What's that picture right there with the hair? That's when he was dressed as Nacho Libre. I can only go down to my, okay. Okay. Go to the one of him in the beanie holding the kid. This just looks like three different people. That looks like an older man to the left. It's a bad angle. That's a bad angle of lighting and looking down at the phone. Okay. Yeah. Okay. But he looks like that. You've seen, you've FaceTimed him. FaceTimed him. Yeah. Okay. No, cute. Okay. Um,

yeah we've been talking whatever like he oh wait i have one more he sent me this is when he had a mullet it's okay but yeah okay okay cute cute yep he's a cutie pie so where are you guys gonna go on a date and should we be there under disguises hang on um as soon as we hang out the call okay oh there's more yes okay um

He said, you still fine as hell without makeup on, by the way. I was like, oh, thanks. Kicking my feet. And he goes, you kiss on the first date, like laughing emoji. And I was like, yeah. She's like, I might suck you off and show you who the throat goat is. Rope you in. Yeah. Chupacabra. Good to know. And then he's also, he was like, I'm not a huge PDA guy. I was like, oh, my God, I'm not either. Like, we just had so much in common. Okay? So, yeah. So. Aww.

I was just like, I'll talk to you tomorrow, whatever. I didn't text back. It was just kind of like ending the conversation. I get a text at 9.50 that's just like, oh, I'm fucking dead this morning, whatever. Okay, cool. I was still asleep. 30 minutes later. Hey, I'll be honest. You're a great person, but the more I've been thinking about it, kids is something I want for myself. I think this won't work out in the long run, but I do wish you the best. Blocked. What?

Why did you take me on this emotional roller coaster? This is why I'm not dating anymore because I actually like this. What was his last name again? I saw it.

He blocked you? Because it's funny because we had the same views on kids too. Like he was like, yeah, I don't know about all that. Like basically your life stops. And I'm like, same. I think that too. Like I wouldn't still live my life right now. I'm not ready for a kid, you know? And like we both, he has like issues, like probably like getting a kid. I have PCOS. So we both were like, yeah, we're going to have to probably make it in a factory, whatever, if we ever want to have a kid. Literally we talked about that. Okay.

And then all of a sudden he's like, I'll be honest. Kids is something I want. And I literally sent back. I said, wait, are you joking? Because I thought he was just fucking with me. I was like, I never said they were completely off the table. Just not right now. My message didn't go through. Blocked. So, mind you, I have another phone. Oh, crazy. I go on my other phone. I go on my other phone because I'm just like,

I want to say something. And I don't even remember what I said on my other phone, but it was basically like the same thing. Like, yo, like, don't block me on this. But I was like, kids, like, I didn't say that's off the table. Like, you also agreed with me. And then I said something under that. I can't remember. But that message didn't go through. So he blocked me already that quick on my other phone. And I go to Facebook dating profile. His is removed. You're blocked. But then.

Mind you, I can find all your social media. Why? I go on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok. I'm not blocked on any of those. So I was like, because I was like, maybe he found out who I was because he did ask at the end. I said, I have a podcast tomorrow. I go to bed. I got to go to bed. He was like, can I ask like who your client is or like what the podcast is for? And I was like, I'll tell you. Yeah, I'll tell you like later or whatever. So maybe he got curious.

And looked me up. Maybe the first podcast he saw was shit stain. And he's probably cheating. But that or he's probably cheating. Look at Jaime. He's like. That's what I would. He's probably cheating on somebody. He was definitely too good of a guy to like not have a girl. Figured out who you were and was like, oh, fuck. I am going to get so busted if I can. Yeah.

But you're going to get busted now. You're on Facebook dating. Yeah, you're on Facebook dating. How are you on Facebook dating if you've got. I didn't say I didn't get like I have a girlfriend bias, but, you know, obviously I just was blindsided this morning. So, yeah, but I was just I literally woke up to that and I was just like, this is where my whole fucking. I'm so upset.

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No, literally, like, I was actually really excited for this date. I was nervous. I literally was texting my last girl to get an appointment. Like, I was, like, trying to be all cute and stuff. And I was just like, are you fucking kidding me? Like, but, like, also, it's funny because...

I was like, I, when I first FaceTimed him and showed him like the guy, I immediately switched to me because I did want him to like hang up and block me. He was like, he was like, no, I wouldn't have blocked you right away. Like I would have said like, yo, what the fuck? And then like, you know, not talk to you. So I'm like, you immediately blocked me over like kids. He has a girl. For sure. He's so like him and his mom and sister.

I think maybe he talked about me to them also. And maybe he brought up the fact I didn't want kids. And they were like, red flag. You're internalizing this. You're internalizing this and you're somehow trying to make this your fault. And this is not your fault. That dude's a fucking weirdo.

He definitely is cheating. He definitely lurked to see who you were. Definitely saw that you're affiliated with us and was like, oh, fuck. But you think he would have blocked me on social medias? He's going to circle back around. Don't block him. He's going to circle back around. Dude's going to unblock you a week from now and he's going to text you. And we're going to get to the bottom of this and find out why. We're getting to the bottom of this. I do because I genuinely... I know it had only been two days, but when I tell you guys, we had...

We had the same sense of humor. I already was like, yo, he's 30 minutes though. Didn't you say he sent you like a morning text message? He was like, I'm fucking dead this morning. And you didn't reply, right? I didn't reply in 30 minutes cause I was still asleep. Okay. So he probably got into his feelings and that was like, there's, there's a new, listen, we can sit here hypothetically. Yes. People are feelings about it's the kid part though. That is so random. He's trying to put it on you. He's gaslighting you, baby.

It is working. Don't let him. Yes. I don't know. Yes. I don't know. I definitely don't think it's the kid's thing, but I'm just like, what the fuck? He found out who you are. Trust me. Am I ever wrong about these things? Have I ever been wrong? She said, no. Anytime I've called anything with any of these dudes, I've always been dead on. I promise you. He either has a girl found out who you were and does not want to get busted or he, uh,

That's the only thing I could think of. It's such a small window, too, because my brain first goes to, like, maybe he stayed up that night and, like, looked you up. Well, he's done. He has crazy eyes. That's why I wanted to see pictures and videos so I could feel his energy. Yes, he's got crazy eyes. So dude's probably very bipolar, too. He's also 24. Yes. Yes.

He probably had a party night last night. He's coming down on something. No, he was with his family. They're visiting his grandma. Literally, his grandma was in the hospital on her 80th birthday. They were visiting family in Virginia. I know so much about... But do we know if any of this is true? When you were on FaceTime, you said his family came in. I did read... His dad walked in. His sister walked in and was like, yo, shut up. So...

the whenever i posted that clip on my tiktok about us doing that there were so many people in the comments if you go read they're like be careful on facebook marketplace because i've been catfished or whatever the fuck they call it that's what it is to me what it is they're like i've been catfished so many times so and how funny though because there was a lot that were like emotional fucking journey

That was a mindfuck. I feel like that was like. That shouldn't have happened and that's fucked up that he did that. Well, so I deleted my fucking profile. I was like, I'm done with this. Why? Don't let that dude fucking detour you. It's not even just him. It's the fact that that disturbed my peace. Yeah. And I don't want that ever to happen again. Well, what happened was it didn't disturb your peace. You got your hopes up and you got your feelings hurt. Yeah. And I don't like that. So if I just don't ever talk to a guy, that's not going to happen. No.

Seriously. I'm going to fucking hurt you. I know. Listen, dude, I'm about to investigate your whole entire fucking life. I have your full name right now. They don't think I won't find your third. That's the first thing I looked at when she brought up his profile. I was like, okay, I'm going to be Googling this motherfucker until fucking midnight tonight. 2 a.m. I'm going to have fucking his blood type. Group chat is going down. Yeah. Fun fact, his dad was security for Britney Spears when she was going through the shaving the head era. I don't know. Something's not making sense.

I just feel like how can you make a decision like that in 30 minutes? Yeah. I guess 30 minutes is a long time, but like you send a good morning-ish text. Yeah. To... We can sit here and speculate all day long. I really... Like I'm so lost. Hey, didn't we want to prank call someone? Give me his number. He would know. You wouldn't give a shit to Sane's number? Give me his number. Please. Please. He would... I'm going to call and give him his STD results. What?

I'm going to block my number. He's going to know it's going to make me look crazier. Honey, he doesn't even know crazy till he's met us. So what's his number? Give it to me right now. Come on. Give it to me right now. You're doing star 67, right? Or should I call by an anonymous? Like you, because if it looks like a, a blocked number, it's going to look like we have a burner. I have a burner number. Okay. We'll use your phone, but you got to bring me your phone over. You know what I think it is too. I saved his number.

Nope. That's not it. I'm telling you every time I save someone's number, it goes south. And I don't like this dude hurt your feelings, man. It was 48 hours of, of, I know, but a distraction, look at it as a pleasant distraction and don't let that motherfucker gaslight you, dude. You did nothing wrong. Something's wrong with him. And we're about to find out exactly what it is. But also like, I think you're a great person and I wish you the best, but,

Then why block me? You know, because he has something to hide, honey. Yeah. He has something to hide. A girlfriend going through his phone, something. It's gotta be that. Like, why would you, but also why would you want to take me on a date to your spot? Like your go-to spot? I don't believe any of his story. I think he's one of those weirdos. Who's probably just looking to fuck random girls behind his girlfriend or wife's back. Cause you're assuming everything he says is true. Yeah. So yeah. Yeah.

And all of it just sounds crazy. Let me know when you're ready for the number. I thought I could call from here, but it's not letting me. Google Meet? Google, like the... I have a burner app. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, do that. This isn't working. Because I feel like if it looks like a blocked number, restricted ID, he's going to know it's me. No, I got it right here. Oh. The only problem is, is it won't let me burn the app unless I've had the number for 10 minutes. So I should just call from my backup phone and just block him.

But if it'll say bunny, never mind. Yeah, no. Jason, let me see your phone. Can we use our Jaime's phone? Who do we want to use? Jaime's last name is not as noticeable. I also mentioned the word Jaime. Well, it could look like Jamie. He might not know. It's going to pop up. My mom's name will pop up. What's mom's name? Leticia. Leticia. I could be like. Well, you know what? He's half Mexican. He might think that like that may be family. Family.

And it's a Southern California number, right? Yeah. Yes. Do Jaime's. Sorry, Jaime. You can block right after. Because he said he doesn't talk to that side of his family and stuff. I thought I could call out. Oh, we're going to ride for you, Haley. Maybe guys are scared to date me because of this. Yeah, we haven't thought of that. Look, angel number 444. Oh.

We're seeing angel numbers all day today. Siri, what does 444 stand for in angel numbers? That means my archangels are next to me. All right, create a number. What area code should I have? 809. 809, okay. Okay, when I call, should I talk like in my normal voice and be like, hey, this is so-and-so? No. But if I call and I'm being funny, he's going to know that it's fucking...

Somebody fucking around is the only okay. I'm gonna just do a 702 number cuz that's a bit all right 213 That's Los Angeles. Okay, you can pretend to be a Facebook rep and say hey We would like to use your profile to promote our Facebook dating. We're actually doing a commercial No, no, that's too close. You're no fun. All right, so we're giving them STD results. Yes. Okay Yeah, all right. My number is two one three who's ready?

- All right, what's his phone number? - 661. - Area code? - Mm-hmm. - Okay. - All right, so I'm gonna, I have to talk differently than what I do now. - Give us your best fake voice. - I was gonna have like my perfect customer service voice on. - Just be super set, like, hi. - Like, hi, is this? - You still sound the same. - But he doesn't say the last name, just say. - Should I just act like a girl that he just met? Be like, I just met you at the bar the other night, you don't remember me? This is Jessica.

I like that. Don't do Jessica though. Do like, um, Evie. Do Tara. Tara. Tara. Okay. Tara's good. Do not make me fucking laugh. I gotta get, I gotta leave the room then. Everyone look away. All right. Ready? Tara. And he's where at? He's in Virginia right now, but he lives here. But I'm going to tell him I met him in Nashville. Yeah. I met you downtown in Nashville. On Broadway. Okay. Sorry, I missed your call. If you would like to leave me a text with your name.

He might be on a flight right now. I forgot. He's flying back from Virginia. Should I text him from the burner? Yeah. Try to text Mimi first and see what it looks like. Yeah. Hold on. Yeah. We're going to make him fall in love. We are going to be the perfect woman ever. And then we're going to fucking break his heart. I like it. Okay. Tell me what it looks like. Show me your asshole. Is it green or blue messages? It's just gray.

Okay, you text back. Should I just try to call one more time? Text. I know he's probably on a flight. Send a text. Say, I don't know if you remember me. My name's Taylor. Like, we met. Say we met. You're micromanaging. I just said, hi, baby. Okay. Because he'll text back all men. If they get a hi, baby text, are immediately going to panic because they have a girlfriend or they're going to be intrigued because they're going to be like, who is this? So let's see if we get a... I feel like you've done this before. Oh, okay.

I got your text that said, sure. All right. So we're going to leave it there. We have just text. We will update you on the next. I still confess that we film not the next one that comes out or the next podcast. Yeah. We'll figure it out. Next podcast that we drop with us. We'll have some something that we record next is going to have this up. Yeah. This boy fucked up because now this guy fucked up. Now he's got the coven on his ass. Again, this is probably why guys don't.

Jason's like, yeah, he's over there giggling, dude. Jason's ready to rock. Whoever I do end up, like, they're going to have to go through a whole. I feel like you're going to have to end up with, like, an industry person that, like, understands your lifestyle. Yeah, someone I already know or you guys already know. Like, it can't be anyone new. Who do we know that's single, guys? He texts back. No. See you guys next week. Bye. Bye.

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