Ask, Tell, Confess: I Hate The Way My Vagina Looks
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One thing I absolutely cannot stand about bras and panties is when they dig into your sides. On the top, girls, you know what I'm talking about when you get that little muffin flap in the back and then on the bottom when it digs into your hip. Absolutely drives me insane. Can't stand it. But with skims, that never happens. And that is why I'm obsessed with skims. Because they're t-shirt bras, I don't get any lumps or bumps, and they're panties, oh my god.

Goodness, their panties are perfect. The material just lays flat on your body, smooth, never bunches up, never cuts in and creases in your hips. It's my favorite. Their Fits Everybody thong is for everybody. She is for the streets, I promise you. I'm telling you, all the girlies, you need to go and get these panties because these are the ones I wear every day, daily. I have some on.

right now as we speak. I also am wearing a t-shirt bra right now and it is the most comfortable bra that I own. It's my go-to. I literally hang it on my doorknob in my closet so that I just grab it and slap it on before I go anywhere. And don't get me started on the unlined demi bra. That one is perfect. It doesn't have wire underneath it, but yet you still get like

pushed up and held and it's just like an all day wear i just can't listen if you guys can't tell i absolutely love skims so please go get you some skims shop skims best intimates including the fits everybody collection and more at skims.com and skim stores after you place your order be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows

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Hello friends, welcome back to another Ashtale. Who's gonna do it? Confess. How are you guys doing?

we're doing good doing long time no see you little donkeys donkey little donkeys what are you guys doing how you doing who you doing no oh you're doing somebody i'm doing no one are we doing someone no i'm not doing anyone you're doing no one still no all right what about you when was the last time you were doing someone uh i don't probably hawaii

I know. We got kids, you guys. Well, what am I? No, who am I? My husband has not been home in 20 days. Yeah, we got kids. Yeah. Last time I got done was in Hawaii, too. So it's hard. Non-stop. Separation, I'm like, bro. I will say I got a gnarly UTI from that. And I don't know if it was the non-stop or the ocean water. All of it. Sitting in the muddy. It was all of it. Muddy. With clothes. I told him, I was like, this was probably a combination of the fact that, like,

there was so much sand in there at one point so much in your vagina bro yeah sand mud but like if you're getting if you're not used to getting dick down constantly non-stop like she shrivels up a bit and is like hey what's going on here like i know mine mine is like protective it's like what is happening and why are we doing this so much yeah we got it in while we could no kids yeah literally let's fuck what about you jaime who you doing how you doing um doing very well um

Yeah. When are we going to see Brooke's tits? Yeah, I've been waiting on this. You have not showed us your girlfriend's boobs. Call Brooke right now and ask her if we can show her tits on the show. Yeah, we need to know. Tell her she's on air too before she responds. So that she knows she's being recorded. Face timer, tell her to go to the bathroom. Drop them out, let me see them titties.

We're FaceTiming. All right, Brooke. We're FaceTiming Jaime's hot-ass girlfriend. Watch her not answer. She's not going to answer. She's like, what does he want? He finally left me alone. Lift it. Hey, babe, we got a question for you. You got to turn it up. She's very quiet. Hi, Brooke. You're on air right now. You are on air. They would like to see your boobies, if that is okay. Yeah.

No, you don't got to show them. He's going to show us a picture. Yeah. A picture of my boobs. Yes. Please and thank you. Please. We wanted your permission before he showed us. I think so. I think I have like an old nude from when we were dating. Yeah. That's hot, though, that he still carries around a nude from when you guys first started dating.

Honestly, yeah, you can show them just as long as you don't show the viewers. No, we won't show the viewers. We would never do that. But we're just going to describe how beautiful they are because Jaime is always talking about how hot your rack is on air. So it's like we really need to see that. We need visuals. I'm a visual learner. I'm so flattered. I'm blushing. All right. Hang up. I want to see some tits. All right. Thanks, babe.

Love you, bye. Can't wait. Pull it up. We have been waiting months for this. It's true. We have asked literally weekly since you've been hired. Weekly. And he's finally shown the rack. This is the only reason we've kept you so long. We got consent from Brooke. Yes. Because he was going to show us without consent and I felt bad. Yeah, he was. Oh, here we go. Here we go.

I'm going to need this up close too. We can't show from there. Can we display it on the TV? Yeah. And we'll just blur it out. Yeah, hold on. Well, listen, guys, he's having a dig for this picture because they've been together a long time. Do you guys not send nudes anymore?

I don't think so. I mean, I see her babies every day. I rarely send nudes to Jay anymore. Do you ever send nudes? Not really. My husband doesn't give me the reaction I want. Like, if I'm going to send a nude, I want you to be like, God dang, baby, you are so fucking fine. My husband's like, what are you doing? I'm horny now. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, what are you doing? Come over. Come on downstairs. I get out of the shower and there's a nude. Yeah. I mean, it's like. Yeah, he watches me shower every day. Send Jason a nude right now.

I want to see his reaction on camera. No, he's got all the ones I would have had. Do you have any nudes on your phone? Oh, I'm sure. Of yourself? I'm sure. I want to see. Who else would they be? Why wouldn't? Wait. I mean, I've got, listen, I have over like 80,000 pictures and videos in my phone. Yeah. A lot of them are screenshots for you hoes, but...

I have so much shit. I had so much shit on my phone that I had to transfer some of it to my backup phone. Really? So I wouldn't lose any of it. Lord, you got a lot of stuff on your phone. I just asked her to resend it because I cannot find it in my phone. Son of a bitch, Jaime. You can type in nude in your camera roll search. Or the year that she would send it to you. Yeah, type in the year you guys got together. Literally search nude. All right, so we'll start with our first story while Jaime is looking for this. You look anxious. Are you starting or are you just...

I'm ready to get started. Look, it's 222. And then I have 222 on my tainted angel sweatshirt. That was meant to be. That's an angel number. That's you know what? I was so stressed out today. That's the angels. What does 222 mean in angel numbers? Let's see really quick. One thing I absolutely cannot stand about bras and panties is when they dig into your sides on the top girls. You know what I'm talking about when you get that little muffin flap in the back and then on the

bottom when it digs into your hip absolutely drives me insane can't stand it but with skims that never happens and that is why i'm obsessed with skims because they're t-shirt bras i don't get any lumps or bumps and their panties oh my goodness their panties are perfect the material just lays flat on your body smooth never bunches up never cuts and increases in your hips it's my favorite

it. Their fits everybody thong is for everybody. She is for the streets, I promise you. I'm telling you, all the girlies, you need to go and get these panties because these are the ones I wear every day, daily. I have some on right now as we speak. I also am wearing a t-shirt bra right now and it is the most comfortable bra that I own. It's my go-to. I literally hang it on my doorknob in my closet so that I just grab it and slap it on before I go anywhere. And don't get me started on the unlined demi bra. That one is perfect. It doesn't have wire underneath it, but yet you still get like

pushed up and held and it's just like an all day wear i just can't listen if you guys can't tell i absolutely love skims so please go get you some skims shop skims best intimates including the fits everybody collection and more at skims.com and skim stores after you place your order be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows

Lipo used to be a bad word, but we're also supposed to act like we love every parts of our bodies. It's BS. You guys know on my podcast, I talk openly about surgeries I've had, and I have had lipo myself. I think as women, we're so hard on our bodies, and if something makes you feel good, do it. It's your body, your choice.

Don't listen to the outside world. If you want to do something that makes you feel beautiful, do it. Getting your body back is so hard though. I get it. That's why I want you guys to check out Sono Bello. Our friends at Sono Bello are offering you their best deal. You're now included in their winter savings event. But...

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It means harmony and peace. Angel number 222 stands for harmony and peace. It is a symbol of balance, harmony, and cooperation in various aspects of life.

It's so fitting for today. That is so fitting for today. I can't wait to share this journey that we're on with you guys, man. You guys are going to really be excited. I can't tell you what it is. I can't tell you what it is we're doing, but you know. All right. So I have two questions. Okay. And we'll just go with one. I feel like we've like stopped asking as many questions because we've gotten so many good stories lately. Yeah, yeah. I'm glad that we're going into the questions. Yeah. So...

This girl wrote in the DM, so I'm not going to say her name. She said she was just listening to the new Ask, Tell, Confess episode and wanted to ask...

My advice, because I feel like you may be able to relate. I know you have talked about your labiaplasty in the past, but I am so insecure about mine. It's preventing me from so much. I want to go out and have fun with guys, but I hate the way my vagina looks. And I know people say it's not a big deal to guys. They just want it. But I don't feel like that's entirely true. And I don't see myself ever being able to afford vaginas.

or get surgery. I don't have the best medical insurance. It's awful. And I just want to be happy. Do you have any advice for overcoming this? What should I do? I feel like this should be talked about a little bit more because I'm going to choose my words wisely here because I don't want to ever insult anybody. I feel like with porn, um,

it creates this fantasy that everybody wants like the clean shaven girl who doesn't have any outer lips, you know? And I think that that's so wrong because I got my labiaplasty because I felt the same exact way she did, you know? And I was just like, you know what? And it's not that I had like too much lip, but it was just, it didn't look like the girls in porn. And I was in the adult industry and I wanted to have something similar.

And I'm, and I'm very happy with my decision, but I have friends who have Audis cause we call them innies and Audis. And I have friends that have Audis and I think they're beautiful. Like I genuinely think that women who we're all made differently. We don't all want to look like a Barbie, you know, like we all want, you want to be different. And I feel like your vagina has as much personality as your face. And I,

use that motherfucker that is the quote of the day guys so the wheels fall off like and and be proud of there's gonna be a man out there who is going to love every piece of you and i feel like with modern uh like only fans and more like porn that's coming out these like homemade videos have really shed light on yeah i hear my face it's really shed light

on the difference in like bodies yeah and it's really helped a lot of women become so much more comfortable with that so what maybe that could help is even if you couldn't afford it find like

the side of the industry that has something similar to yours and realize like there are so many other. Does your little Loki like Audis? I love Audis. Christy Mack has an Audi and her vagina is beautiful. Exactly. So maybe she just, maybe she's watching a certain kind of porn that she thinks is beautiful, but she needs to find the beauty in what she has. Yeah. And you know, as women, we always want what we don't have.

So there's a girl that has an innie that's looking at your outie being like, man, I wish I had a little more lips. There's a blonde that's thinking, man, I wish I was a brunette. Me, there's a brunette, and I really am a brunette. I'm trying to go back dark, and it's been a hellacious process. But as women, we have to really start loving ourselves for who we are, and we have to start...

Finding ways to love ourselves more because I just feel like we are our worst enemies and we're always critiquing ourselves. I say that about like my self-love journey when I was trying to love myself bigger so that I could love myself more as I like became smaller because I always felt like in the past it was always like no matter how much weight I lost, I wasn't happy because I didn't love myself for

Regardless of who I was. It was really cool to love myself at a bigger size. And now that I'm small, I appreciate every step along the way. Yes. It's really, it's crazy how I told myself at one point, if I could teach myself how to drive a car, if I could teach myself to become a hairstylist or whatever I've taught myself that I didn't know prior, then why couldn't I teach myself how to love myself? Because there's plenty of people out there who do love themselves. Yeah.

It was a mind over matter kind of situation, literally. And a perfect example that I want to use too for this is I had a beautiful rack before I got my boobs done. Like my natural tits were phenomenal. But because I caught my ex watching certain porn stars who had big fake boobs, I wanted to make him happy. And I ended up getting huge,

fake boobs that did nothing but cause complications to my body. My implant folded in half. How big were they? 490 CC, but what ha that's already on top of a lot of breast tissue. So I ended up almost being an E after it was all said and done. And then my left tit started growing to triple the size of what my right tit was because my implant was folded and my

a lobster claw, like a big, huge lobster claw piece of meat of scar tissue grew inside of me and was making me sick. And I did that all to make a man happy. That's crazy. And then I ended up getting them fucking taken out. And I was going to say, you don't have them. And to,

to top it off after I had my explant is when I started my only fans and made fucking millions of dollars on all natural, all with natural boobs. So if I could just teach you guys something, cause I'm, you know, yes, I get Botox. Yes. I get my lips done. I stopped getting filler in my face about two years ago because,

As you get older, you get more comfortable with imperfection and you want to be different. Yeah. So please just know how you're feeling when you're in your 20s and 30s is not how you're going to be feeling when you're in your 40s and 50s. Yeah. It's it's a journey of self-love and we're all on this journey together. So.

We just all got to lift each other up and just know that you're perfectly imperfect. Yeah. And you have no idea how happy you are on the other side of it. Absolutely. I didn't wear shorts for 17 years because a kid in seventh grade made fun of how fat my legs were. Yeah. So I missed out on 17 years of wearing shorts. To the member the first year I started wearing shorts, I wore them in the dead of winter. She goes, we're going to go buy you pants. Yeah. I was like, I love you. You're going to get sick. This is my first year in shorts. I'm going to wear it forever.

All year long. Don't care if it's snowing. Don't even care. It was snow. I was coming into the studio one day. She was like, can you put some pants on? Yeah. I was like, bro, you're going to get snow. It's so freeing on the other side of it. Just know that. If the slots are spinning, you could be winning. Head over to DraftKings Casino and play the classics you know and love. Or try something new with DraftKings exclusive games. Plus, new players that give DraftKings Casino a spin can get 200 casino spins on a featured game.

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equivalent to $15 a month. New customer offer for first three months only. Bid full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See MetMobile for details. So I know we didn't give you the answer you probably wanted, but I hope we gave you some perspective. Yeah, and everyone else listening to this who may not have been as comfortable to ask a question like that. Yeah, absolutely. All right. Haley got excited a second ago, so I know we had tits pop up on the screen, but let's take a gander. We're going to see Brooks...

Hooters right now. Here we go. Here we go. Turn it sideways, please. Zoom in. Look at Brooke. Please zoom in. Oh my God. She's so hot. Dude. Brooke. We got the full Monty. We got it all. The mirror. Bro. Brooke is so fire, dude. I'm going to go whack off to this picture. Yeah, I got to go. Can you say it in your group chat?

Yeah. It's getting hot in here. Tell Brooke, like, hey, listen, it's bad enough we just exploited her onto millions of people, but hey, can she send us that picture? She's so hot, dude. She's perfect. She has the perfect nipple size. Did you take this? No, it was her roommate. Oh. Which is why it's so...

you know okay artistic and yeah i love it they put a lot of work into this no she's so hot yeah damn her body's jaime you scored yeah she's a body yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy love that did she say don't ghost me yeah oh no she just texted me just now she was like

Don't ghost me after I send you this nude now, LOL. Oh my God. I'd be like, I'm all I'm doing is thinking about getting home to you, baby. Yeah. Say, sorry, I'm mopping up everyone's drool. Yeah. Yes, absolutely. Right now. She's so fire. All right. What do you guys got for me? I haven't asked.

Have you guys ever heard of the Tinder date gone wrong that recently happened where she came out and the cops told her she needed to see her apartment. It was covered in plastic. You can find it on TikTok. So I heard a little bit about this, but can we find the clip? Can we pull this up? Yeah, let's pull this up. I feel like I heard a little bit about it, but... It's crazy. That's like some real life Dexter shit. Can we put this on the screen and turn it up? Crank it up.

Hold on, I got this right here. Somebody's telling it on a podcast too. This Tinder story is not mine, but a friend of mine. Now, obviously that raises, you know, we're not necessarily big fans of

big fans of that but you know it works it works crazy some suspicions yes absolutely some eyebrows uh this story happened in vienna my friend met a guy on tinder and went on a few dates with him about uh for about a month one day she decided after a date to finally invite him to her house for a drink during these drinks she started feeling some weird vibes from him so when uh

Sorry, weird vibes from him. So when it was time to go to bed, she asked him if he would be okay with sleeping on the couch in the living room. He said, yes, good man, as you should. For some reason, she decided to lock her bedroom. She's always been a little bit paranoid. And then she went to sleep. In the middle of the night, she heard her door handle move. She woke up and asked him, are you okay? Thinking maybe he was looking for the bathroom and he didn't answer.

Okay.

Wow. So this is, okay, so this is one of those stories that's a friend of a friend of a friend that has been kind of, but still, let's, hypothetically speaking, that's kind of hot. Shout out the fellas for having this on there. That's kind of hot. Wait, what?

I only say that it's hot joking around because I... If you fucking ever watch Dexter, bro, like, I love... I love Dexter. I love Dexter. That's some Dexter shit. Literally. That is some Dexter shit right there, though. And he was a good guy. He was. Dexter was the good guy. So, but...

If that happened in real life, scary. Like, get the fuck out of here. I'm so terrified. Yeah. This is why I don't want to date and I don't want anyone over to my house. They're not coming to my house. You have to be careful nowadays because people are just fucking, like, I don't, it's free willy out here, dude. I've never dated in, like, the online, like, app era. I've only, I met Jason so long ago. Luckily, I haven't either. Yeah, that...

She's like, oh, God. I mean, I just couldn't imagine just swiping until you found someone that you found attractive and then just going for it. I don't know. I guess that's like a mental thing that like. Well, the problem is and there are some people who find love that way. But the problem is, is we're in a microwave era. So as quick as you swipe left, that's.

That person is out of sight, out of mind. It could have been a really just bad photo of them. Nobody has real connections with anybody anymore. Like nobody. It's like everybody wants to have a relationship over text. Nobody wants to meet in person. Nobody, you know, it's fucking weird. Where do people meet nowadays? Do you just meet at the bars? Yeah. That's how I always met people was at bars. Like at least it's real life. Or like set up by a friend. Yeah. Yes. But like even then, like.

I think that's happened to me one time where someone was like, yo, you would really like my cousin. And I really did talk to him for like a year. Ended bad. But that was the only time I got set up like a mutual friend that was like, I know you and I know you and I know you guys would be good together. You know what I'm jealous of is people who can meet at church.

Like that people who meet at church and can like fall in love and have like real good relationships. Like why wasn't that in my fucking fairy tale? I mean, my church, I love my fairy tale older. Well, what is it? My church, they were all married and older. Like there was really no one. There was people my age, but yeah, but I just, you know, I think that that this is a lesson, even if this isn't a true story, because nobody can seem to find facts anywhere that, you know, girls, you know,

I know you want to get it on. Listen, when I was single, I used to bang them on the hood of my car or like in the backseat of my car. And then that way they never had to come home with me, you know? So ever since I like, I was celibate for almost two years. That's what really, um,

let me like not have just random guys over to my house all the time because i was like and i got stolen from one time but like after that bro after the family guy whack off that's that's who started that's who started my celibacy yeah and i got a new mattress i got a whole new bed frame like i threw everything out and i was like i'm done having random guys over to my house all the time like yeah and no one's been to my new house yet no one's been on my new mattress yet like

That's your energy. I know. You are inviting energy into your life. And listen, when I was young, I fucking got it in. Okay. I'm just as young.

Oops, there's our food. There's our food. As somebody who's lived a full fucking life, just know that your vagina is a harbor for that man's energy that you're bringing home. And not only that, but just that's bringing energy into your house, into your body, into your mind, into your soul, you know? So it's like, just know that you're going to make a energy exchange with this human. I don't want that. I think that's why I like staying single because...

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I did not realize how much I protected my peace at home until like here recently. I like...

Bad energy in your home is the worst thing you could possibly imagine. It's hard to get rid of. Yes. Absolutely. I had to fucking move. Yeah. Basically. Yeah. Yeah. And once I moved, I realized that.

That house I lived in for seven years was so negative. Yeah. Yeah. And you were surrounded by negativity. Well, yeah, I had two roommates. You had other people's energy too. Like, and you know, next door to you, you had the crackheads. It was really bad. So I could tell a huge difference when I moved. Yeah. You're passionate about where you live now. Yes. I love to watch that. I'm really passionate about the other part.

Just remember your house is your, is your sanctuary and your body is your temple. Absolutely. I love that. Yeah, baby. Love it. All right. I'm going to play my voice. Snippet, clip it. Let's go. You're on one today. No, you know what? You're s'more today. Literally. I am. I almost got attacked by my fricking cow the other day. My mother passed away in 2014. Rest in peace. Um,

So this was probably 15 years ago. Her and I worked at the same lawyer's office together. She was my supervisor and we worked with a bunch of guys so it was just her and I. Long story short, I was single at the time, kind of just dating around. My mom did

have like a not a husband but someone she called a husband at the time who had ED issues and they were having a bunch of issues so we were both kind of like having an affair with somebody but we didn't know like at the same time that it was the same person we were both sleeping with the same person and um

So how we came about finding out was we were talking about it one day because me and my mom were very, very close. And so we were talking and there's so many similarities. And he had walked in the room and we both had gotten up to go embrace him. And I was like, what the hell?

uh, yeah, we both got fucking around with him. And, um, yeah, that was the most disgusting thing that has happened to me in my life. Um, I did forgive my mother, of course, because she's my mother. But, yeah, what a disgusting fucking pig. And, like, he obviously knew that we were mother and daughter, you know, and we all worked together. So, um, yeah, that's my other confess. And, uh, I love you guys so much.

Okay, so let me get this right. Her and her mom were having affairs on their significant others? Well, the mom was in like a situationship with someone, but she was single. Okay, single. So like they were sleeping with, they were both just sleeping with someone not knowing that same. But why did she say I forgave my mom? Like why would you have to forgive your mom if your mom didn't know? Well, I guess it was probably just something she said. Yeah. But yeah, like my question immediately was do you think he knew? Yep, she answered that. Because I was like does he know?

know that he definitely knows i think that's i think some men have that fantasy of banging a mom and a daughter like it's weird yeah that's strange that's like the porn industry though i was gonna say i've seen so many porn titles with yeah that's so crazy yeah you're so sisters with your mama

No. That was a wild confess. Yeah, that was crazy. I loved it, though. It was good. That was a good one. What a way to end it. What a way to end it. What a way to end it. All right. Our salads are here. Salads. Let's go partake. Bye.