Ep 139 - Own Your Icks | ShxtsnGigs Podcast
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This season, Instacart has your back to school. As in, they've got your back to school lunch favorites like snack packs and fresh fruit. And they've got your back to school supplies like backpacks, binders, and pencils. And they've got your back when your kid casually tells you they have a huge school project due tomorrow. Let's face it, we were all that kid.

So first, call your parents to say I'm sorry and then download the Instacart app to get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes all school year long. Get a $0 delivery fee with your first three orders while supplies last. Minimum $10 in order. Additional terms apply. You can say it as many times as you want. I've never heard that before.

Chupapi Meneño. Chupapi Meneño. Chupapi. You have to say it like that. Chupapi Meneño. Happy Monday, you naughty little mixes. What it do, what it do. What it do, what it is. Hope you've had a good week thus far. Mm-hmm.

Guys, you already know the drill. We need to start chirps and more tings in the comments so we can build up the relationship so that when we move to HQ of the cult in the big green field, we've got breeding territories so that we can make this last generation. Yeah, man. So if you're on YouTube, guys, click subscribe. Click the notification bell so you know when the next ting drops. Flip in.

like the video and chirps it in the comments. That's all we ask for. That's not all we ask for. It's literally it. Um, help us help you and help the masses. Okay. Um,

Obviously, you already know if you're sitting here and you're loving this Monday vibe and you just think it's just not enough. It's just not enough. It's a healthy appetizer, but it's just not that long now. Can't wait. It's another seven days. Yeah, seven days is too long. I want to binge. I want to binge. Head on over patreon.com.

forward slash shits and gigs. That's where the party's at. Okay. That's where the vibes are at. Um, do I get to say the best bro? It only costs you three pound a month, 10 P a day, 10 P a day. Okay. Run us to pee. Run the pee. It's so basic. It's so simple. It's like a step-by-step plan. We, we patent it for you. All you have to do is follow instructions. Yeah. It's sorted. All you need to do is follow through. Um,

Obviously, if you guys are listening to the audio on Spotify or Apple Podcasts, make sure you subscribe and make sure you leave us a nice review. Yeah, man. We're running hard at five stars at the minute, so it's looking good. It's looking good, guys. So you tuned into the second biggest podcast in the world with your boy, Jay Money, Fire Lord Fwakes, Dragon of the West. He's going to hit us with some fun facts. Let's buckle up and get into a good Monday. Let's go. Come on. Let's go. Right.

there's a 10 year old girl that can retire after 15 after at 15 sorry after earning a hundred and five thousand dollars in one month you saw i saw this yeah i haven't read anything about it i saw it and i was like starred yeah man i'm gonna talk about this yeah what's she doing

This Australian little girl called Pixie Curtis has already established two successful businesses with the help of her mother. An accessory range called Pixie Bows and a toy range called Pixie Fidgets. The mother-daughter duo first launched their Pixie Bows in 2011. Estimates say Pixie will earn over $21 million over the next decade. In May, her line of fidget toys sold an impressive $200,000 in her debut month.

She also has 89K Instagram followers and charges up to $600,000 for a sponsored post by the time she was six. For one sponsored post? Six. She thinks she's Kim Kardashian. Fam? $600,000. For one sponsored post? That doesn't make any sense. No one's paying that. Surely no one's paying that. What's going on? Nah, fam. How many followers? 89 bags. Is that it?

Then, she must have more now. I was going to say, well, she wasn't charging half a mil for 89k followers, was she? No, she couldn't have. Yeah, that's... She couldn't have. I don't know who you think you are, bro. She couldn't have. Wow. That's disgusting money. Kids love fidget shit. Yeah, that's the thing. They love fidget shit. We spoke about this a few episodes ago about the top 10 YouTubers...

Oh, Ryan's toys and stuff. Yeah. Ryan's toys was number one. Yeah. It's just like Ryan slaying. Fuck man. Just two, two toys. A couple of toys fam. We might have to start doing some reviews on some techno stuff. You know, unboxing, unboxing some shit.

Because that's where the money's at, apparently. These men are killing it. You, man, what should we unbox? Yeah, we can unbox something. But I don't want to buy it. Send us something we can unbox. Buy it for us, send it, and we'll unbox it. We'll talk about it. We'll give you the specs and all sorts. Yeah, because that is a mad thing. That doesn't make sense, brother. Yeah, these lot make pee, fam. Fucking hell.

Fucking hell. A little kid. The thing is, I love how they're like, oh, with the help of her mother. Her mother's dictating that whole show. The whole thing. She's not seen that P till she's 21. Yeah, fam. Her mum's living lavish. Lavish. Yeah, bro. Oh my God. They love that shit. They love that shit. That's crazy, bro. Bro. That's crazy. It just doesn't, things like that just don't make sense. So she made 200K in her debut month and that's her second business that she did that with. Yep. Wow. Wow. Wow.

That's money, money. Yeah, yeah. Fair play, man. That's all I can say. She'll never have to work a day in her life. Fair fucking play is literally all I can say. That's literally all I can say as well. Yeah, that's nuts. Before we get into what you want to get into, I've got a quick trash news. Yeah, yeah. And I've got a game I want to play. Oh, okay. Go on. Cool. So quick trash news. There's a Florida couple that got nabbed for license violation.

having sex in a police patrol car and they filmed it for their OnlyFans. Brave. A lie. So they got arrested or they just snuck into the car? I'm going to read the whole thing. All right, go, go, go. A Florida couple was allegedly caught on video having sex in the back of a police car.

A Florida Highway Patrol trooper said that Summer Watkins and Jordan Now, both 24, engage in sexual activity after being placed in a patrol car when Noah, sorry, they've spelled his name wrong twice. I don't know which one it is. Let's go with Noah. Yeah. When Noah was pulled over for driving with a suspended license earlier Thursday morning.

Watkins allegedly told Noah, baby, we should record an OnlyFans video while we're back here. Minutes before the couple began having oral sex, according to the, minutes after, sorry, the couple began having oral sex, according to the arrest report. Noah was taken from the car soon after and arrested by another trooper over controlled substances that they had discovered in the car. Perez Morales is the lady, then dropped Watkins off at the gas station.

Minutes later, the Perez Morales reviewed video footage on the parole car. Minutes later, the Perez slash Morales reviewed video footage from the paroled car. The trooper quickly returned to the gas station and arrested Watkins. She was charged with lewd and lascivious. I don't know how to pronounce that word. Am I going to presume it's lascivious behavior and breach of the peace? You know, wow. Yeah.

Noah was charged with possession of controlled substance, possession of marijuana, breach of peace, indecent exposure of a sexual organ, and lewd of lascivious behavior. Both defendants were taken to county jail after being arrested. They were each released on bond within a day. A December 13th court date has been set for Noah and Watkins is expected to be in court on December 16th. And this is them.

oh she's kind of sexy yeah i can i can see them doing a little oh yeah a little only fans thing in the back of a car yeah i'd let her something like regardless of where we are yeah yeah yeah i can see that i can see the appeal of it yeah you would catch that lucid behavior as well i don't know if that's how you pronounce the word but it sounds like the word that's not she got them lips she has got them dsls yeah she has got them dick sucking lips for sure for sure wow oh god that's brave fam is brave and it's like

What are they making on OnlyFans to think like this is worth getting arrested for? They're already in the whip. They're already arrested. They just said, fuck it. Let's try and make it bigger. To be fair, if you're already there. Why not? When are we going to get this chance again? It's probably never going to happen again. Mad. Mad indeed. Mad indeed. Mad indeed. So they weren't even cuffed, clearly. Clearly. Unless you unzip the tingle of her teeth. Yeah.

How did he talk to Allah? That's naughty. That's naughty. If I was the police, I'll be the worst police officer. If I'm writing something up and I just be, if I'm writing up a ticket and I just peek over and then man's getting slopped off in the back of my whip, I'll pretend I didn't see nothing. Oh,

I'm not a hater. Bro? I'm not a hater. I'll let them do what they need to do. Do what you need to do. Because it's probably the last time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not going to see each other for a while. Do what you need to do. Especially if I'm going to charge them anyway. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Big man, do your thing. Might as well complete the task. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do your thing, do your thing, do your thing. You're going to need that bail money because you're not going to see daylight.

So I hope this slop is worth it. But yeah, I'll let them finish off. Fucking hell, that's jokes. That's, ooh, that's wild. She got vexed. When homeboy said he reviewed the ting and then skirt the ting back around to get her, she was livid when he rocked back up. Livid. 100%. Livid. 100%.

that's wild she should have dipped from that gas station oh my days that's wild people are crazy man um more trash news hit me a bit annoying because when we're recording this is going to be a week behind fucking i just found out tommy fury backed out of the fight i read that on the train here he replaced it with someone they've not said why yeah no one said why because they're pussy or that's why that's the only excuse i can think of unless someone in your family is dead

I don't want to hear it. Oh, following that, I've got Tyrone Woodley back. Say that again? His replacement. Yeah. Tyrone Woodley. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I've had something somewhere about Tommy.

On my phone somewhere. But continue anyway. Continue. I've got it somewhere. But yeah, so obviously he's out. As of today when we're recording this, we don't know why. Hopefully by the time this comes out, we will know why. But yeah, man, I'm not happy. I'm not happy at all. I'm not best pleased. Not even in the case of I was looking forward to the fight. I was just looking forward to the result. Yeah, I don't care about the fight. I don't even want to see the fight. I would have watched it, but I don't actually care. I just...

I don't know, bro. I just don't understand what could have possibly... I just don't get it, fam. Literally, in my head, for this thing, the way he's been chatting, the way his dad said, if you don't knock him out, it's X. The way his brother said, if you don't knock him out, it's X. Just order this chat for a week before. Man said it's off.

And what's going on? What is going on? Is your mom in hospital? Is everything all right? What is going on? Literally, what is going on? The pops is a savage as well. I found the fact that I was going to talk to you about. I had this on my phone for a random reason. It said, in 2011, John Fury, father of Tyson Fury, was found guilty of wounding with intent to cause grievously bodily harm after a street fight in 2010. He gouged a man's eye out with his thumb and left him half blind. That doesn't surprise me. Just,

Bang. Yeah, it doesn't surprise me at all. He's a fucking animal. Yeah, it doesn't surprise me at all. Fucking hell, man. Yeah, it doesn't surprise me at all, bro. Fucking animal. He's a traveller man. They don't care about them things. Gypsy King and the Father. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They don't care about them. Fucking animal, bro. Yeah, bro. All of them are mad. So I'm not surprised Tommy got shook on just... I'm gonna... He was shook. I'm allegedly saying he's shocked. He was shook, yeah. He must have been. Yeah, because it's too much pressure for one man. The way everyone's telling him, if you lose his curtains...

I'm not surprised. The thing is, he's not poor. He don't need this money. The money's going to be healthy. There's going to be more money than he's ever made, probably. But he don't need it. He's comfortable. So for your family to be like, it's curtains for you if you don't win this, fam. It's literally curtains for you. It's literally curtains now that he's pulled out. It's curtains, but there's always a reason you can say why you pulled out. He's never going to say, because I'm shocked. He's going to make up some kind of fucking reason.

why he either broke his wrist or he got knocked out in sparring and flipping or something happened he's probably he'll probably come under something happened during training that's as to why he can't do it and he's going to pick it up as soon as he can and it's never going to happen tyron woodley's back in tyron woodley who's i don't know anything so tyron woodley was his last fight jake's last jake's last fight okay former ufc what what weight was he i can't remember what weight maybe welterweight um

He used to be a UFC champion. Okay. Former UFC champion. Savage. Absolutely savage. So that was Jake's last fight. Really disappointing fight. Jake obviously won. Tom Woodley is a decent boxer. I have a sneaking suspicion that fight was fixed. Why? Well, so during the fight,

There's a couple times. So Jake won on points, right? Mm-hmm. There was a couple times in that fight where Tyron rocked Jake's jaw off. Mm-hmm. He nearly put him through the ropes. He rocked him and Jake was half out of the ropes, fam. Yeah. And then when Jake's back up again, the time to attack, Tyron didn't do anything. Mm-hmm.

So he could have won it then. Oh, 100%, fam. When he boxed him through the ropes, as soon as he got back into the ring, one more bang, Jake would have been out, fam. And that happened like twice where he rocked him hard and then just didn't finish him. And I was thinking that was sus at the time. And then literally as soon as Tyrone lost...

There was no kind of, this is fucking bullshit. This is da-da-da-da-da. There was no kind of, oh, fuck it. You know what? I lost. I lost. It was literally, as soon as he lost, where you can take this one of two ways. You can take it as competitive or you can take it as like, I'm just money hungry. As soon as Jake's hand got lifted up, Tyrone was like, rematch, rematch, rematch. Run the rematch. Run the rematch. Run the rematch. Let me take your money. Run the rematch. Run the rematch. Run the rematch. As obviously, Tyrone's retired. That's a fat payday for him. So,

rematch on the cards was already for as soon as he lost he said rematch Ting immediately I'm ready and I was thinking there would never be a rematch if you knocked him out yeah the whole Ting would have been done if you knocked him out yeah that never would have happened but if you took the L yeah

Then there's a plausible rematch, especially if it's a close fight. And Jake wins, then there's a plausible rematch. There you go. We've got a rematch now. Jake even said, I'll give you a rematch if you get I Love Jake Paul tattooed on you. And Toronto's like, bet.

And he's actually got, I'm pretty sure it's on his finger. He's got like a little, I love Jake Paul tattoo. And I don't know if it's real or if he just died, did it in pen, but came out a couple months ago. Like, where's the rematch? He took pictures of our rematch thing. Like he's desperate for this cake again. And I was just like, I wasn't impressed. I really was not impressed. Um, so we'll see how the second fight goes because there ain't gonna be a third. So we'll see how the second fight goes. Hopefully Tyrone just comes in and says, cool. I'm glad I got my rematch. Yeah.

Like it was, it was all games last time. Drop first round, run me my pee and I'm out. I'm praying to God. That's what happens. I don't know if that is what's going to happen, but I'm praying to God it does. Because if you lose to him again, I'm done. Well, Tommy, I'm done with you and Tyron. I'll be done with you. I'll be done with the whole affair. If Tyron comes in here and loses again, I just haven't got time for it. I'm assuming the only, the only clause is, is incredibly short notice for Tyron Woodley.

incredibly short notice what's he gonna do he's got two weeks he's gonna get knocked out there's fuck all you can do in two weeks he's gonna get knocked out he ain't get knocked out I don't think he's gonna get knocked out he's retired but he's still a fucking animal I don't think he'll get knocked out we'll see I don't know I don't know I'll be I'll be embarrassed for him if he does I'll be embarrassed for him if he gets knocked out let me see what Tyrone Woody looks like

He's got legs on him. I don't follow boxing at all like that. But he's not a boxer. He's a UFC fighter. Oh, UFC brother. Tyrone Woodley said it. Okay. First thing that came up. They're listening, brother. They're listening. They are, they are, they are. Fuck me. Oh, he looks familiar. Yeah, he's a warrior, fam. He's massive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's jacked, fam. He's massive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's short. He's Jake Shaw. Jake's much taller than him. He's like 5'8", 5'9". I think Jake's like 6'0". Maybe. Maybe.

Jake's got size on him now though a bit Jake's got size on him now yeah yeah yeah he's got size on him now I'm not gonna lie to you yeah yeah and he's boxing day in day out that's the thing I'm not even trying to say he ain't shit yeah he can fight Tyron Wood is a former UFC champion fam fair enough he's a warrior fair enough very fucking love he's been fighting his whole life

damn yeah but yeah intriguing intriguing um we'll see how it goes i'm not impressed with tommy bro neither am i when i saw that literally saw that on the train down here i was like oh not even in the case of i was looking forward to the fight anything i just want to see the aftermath i want to know who won yeah bro because it's all been chit-chat all been chit-chat so yeah you need to know what's it about yeah it's i'm not happy about that at all yeah it wasn't cool man um fuck

It's just his ways, I guess. There's nothing we can do. It is what it is. I don't know if he's going to... Like I said, at this point, there's been no kind of release or anything. So I want to see what his excuse is and if he's going to even try and pick it back up. But I already know what's going to happen. He's literally just going to be like...

Something went wrong in training. I'm injured or I'm concussed or something. As soon as I get back on my feet, this fight is back on. Jake Paul, the YouTuber, is a fucking chitch and I would smash him, whatever, like it's whatever. And then he's going to give a chat for about a week until it all bubbles down. And then he's never, you'll never hear of it again. Yeah.

You can't show his face. And then whenever anyone asks about it, he'll literally just say, bro, my agents have been hollering him day in, day out. He don't want it. He don't want the fight. I know how these games go. They always go this way. When one person ducks out, they try and save face for years. And they're always like, bro, I've been asking him for months and months. I've been on the phone to him trying to get this fight. He don't want the fight. There's a reason. He's scared. He's just going to do it for time and time again. And Jake's going to be like, bro, I sent proof of funds to his yard last week.

And no one, I ain't heard nothing. It's all, it's definitely what's going to happen. It's always fucking to happen. That's a, that's a show. It's dead, bro. It is dead. And like I said, I wasn't even looking forward to the fight anyway. But when that happens, you're like, I can understand if Jake pulled out, he's supposed to be here. He's not supposed to be here. Yes. It's a lot more impressive. Yeah. So it's like, I need to know what happened to you, bro, for you to pull out because you've been chatting, like say you can smack him up with your eyes closed. So what's going on that you can't fight this my man in two weeks. Yeah.

Two weeks, which is long enough to sort yourself out. Yeah, regardless. Regardless. Regardless. Yeah, yeah. Unless he's got like a broken toe. Yeah, unless you've broken a bone or something. I don't know what's happening. We'll see. I'll see him about it, Manny, anyway. I'll see him about it. I'll ask him. Fam, between now and then, you ain't seeing it. I know. He's not leaving his yard. I haven't seen it for months. I already know it. Fam, you'll drive past his yard with eggs all over it. Eggs and tissue paper, fam. A mug. Fucking hell.

It's literally not on. Oh, well. So, for the first time ever, we've got a cheeky bit of back and forth beef. I sent you earlier in the DMs. Yeah. Cheeky bit of back and forth beef in the DMs. That's hilarious. I've never seen anything like it. Because I looked at the dates. I was like, one was in November or September and then one was the other day. I was thinking, how do you even pattern that? Yeah, fam. Mad. Because the thing is, I hadn't even...

I hadn't even seen it. Let's have a look. See. So the first one from back then, I hadn't even seen until today, which is when I saw this first one as well. I realized it was a, all right, cool. So for context, guys, we received a message from 23rd of November is when we got it from this young lady who said, I have an ick for men when you're having car sex and he wants to do you from behind.

So gets his bare, pale ass out of the car in the freezing cold and starts hitting it from behind whilst putting a dent in your door with his knee. Icky behavior. As I'm scrolling through, I see another DM. Am I the dickhead? Am I the dickhead? I was beating out this girl doggy in her car and ended up denting her car door with my knee, smashing against it. She wants me to pay for the dent. I said, nah, fam.

Then at the bottom, she watches the podcast too. So let her know man ain't paying. You heard it here first, guys. Man ain't paying. He ain't paying. He ain't paying shit. That's hilarious. Sweetened me when I saw it. I can't believe it. Neither could I, because it's one of the odds, first and foremost. But I'm trying to envision how he's backshotting a chick and his knees dent in the car. So in my head... Because... Continue, continue. I'm now trying to envision. In my head...

they're just out of the car in it so she's in or she's got her legs out and her body's in bent over he's out and he's got a leg up or something and his knee is smashing against the door or something like that bro i don't know how it's worked but it's worked yeah i'm just thinking how was even but anyway yeah i don't know he must have been smashing to get his knee to bend his knee was doing something that's all i know he must have hit it more than once yeah thinking

I would have stopped after the first donk. Like, my knee hurts. She resents Donnie. From when she got his pale, bare ass. Nah. Don't hold me up like that. She hated him. She hated him that day. She hated him that day. Oh, that's hilarious. Pale, don't run from my cheeks like that. How are you going to send for my skin tone? Oh, on live TV. She watches the pod too, so tell her I ain't paying for shit. Fam, so...

Fair play, hers is an ick or whatever. To his, what's your actual opinion? Should he pay or should he not pay? Say it's you. I mean, I wouldn't necessarily say I'm flat out not paying because it takes two to tango kind of ting. Cool. But within the same breath, I don't know. It would have to be something like...

let's say she brought it up to me or I said, oh fuck, whilst I was fucking, I didn't even clock, I did this kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, my fucking bad, you know, was he in a moment, blah, blah, blah. And we decides to go halfies, I'll be okay with that. Yeah. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it also depends on

how the conversation started. Was she like, you're fucking paying for this. That's what I was thinking. She's probably gone down like, nah, you're fucking paying for this. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, darling, honey,

Sis. No, no, no, no. We did this. We did this. We made this. Exactly. Let's talk about this. She's like, nah, fuck that. You're paying for this. I can't afford this. That's how in my head it panned out. That's probably why it's like, tell her I ain't paying for shit. Tell her on the live show, I ain't paying for shit. Bro, that's exactly what my thought process was in terms of if it was me, I would offer and be like, look,

that I accept some responsibility for this. I do think two to tango kind of thing, but I do accept some responsibility if you want to go halfs or if I can contribute, let me know how much it costs. I will contribute what I can contribute and stuff like that. I'm sorry, et cetera, et cetera. Then that's what I would have done immediately. So when he said, because actually, no, no, no. I saw his before I saw hers. Okay. So when I read it, I was thinking, you're not a man cuz. Do you know what I mean? When I first read his, I thought you're not a man, bro.

you're just denting out Yass' cars and saying tell her on the pod I ain't paying I was thinking who do you think you are bruv but then when you read hers as well even though she hasn't said I told him to pay or anything when you read it you do think a bit like oh I do wonder if the circumstance was you're fucking paying for this then he might have been a bit like hang the fuck on 100% it would have yeah because there's no way I don't see her

saying his pay loss and blah like that came from the depth like that's that's vengeful you know yeah that's revengeful she she was upset when she typed it yeah yeah so it 100% would have been a case of she instigated a conversation or said like oh you have to fucking pay for this and he's like whoa

I ain't paying for this shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a two man thing, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I see it. That's how I see it. I do think he should be a man and do something though. Because when you, if we're going to get logistical, it's his fault. 100%. It's actually his fault. Of course it is. And not her fault at all. Yeah, of course, of course, of course. If your knee makes contact with my car, it's his fault.

That's all of your fault. Now granted, the only responsibility I will accept is that it's my car and I can't make you pay shit. So I'm never going to come with smoke like, big man, you're sorting this out. Because immediately I expect them to be like, suck out. Literally, bye. Bye. Your car, your problem. I nutted, I dented, I'm out. I'll leave while she's still been over. You can't make me do anything. I'll take my pale, bare ass home.

Kiss his pale ass goodbye. Shit. Yeah, bro. But yeah, if she came with a humble ting, if she did, let's, okay, let's not put all the earnest on her aggression. If she did actually come at him on a humble one and say, yo,

I can't afford this. Like, can you, or even if I can afford this, I, even if she said, I do think though, you should be helping me to pay this because it's your fault. Yeah. And he still says no, then he's a bellend. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. He's a bellend. You're not a man. You're not a man. You're not a man. A hundred percent. You got to take some responsibility of that. If that's the energy she came with. If that's the energy, but we need a little bit more context. So I'm expecting DMs from both parties and we can hash this out. Me and Fred are going to mediate this thing. Let's just see how the story unfolds. That's what we're here for. Both of you, you know who you are.

Young lady, send us the full breakdown. Send us your point of view. Young man, send us the full breakdown and we're going to mediate this. We'll go from there. We'll see who's lying. Kevin Samuel glasses on and we'll find out where the truth lies. Yeah. Because like we said in the previous episode, there's your story, there's her story and there's the truth. We're going to get to the bottom of it. You can't swindle us.

You can't. We've been around this block. The Am I the Arsehole block? We've been around it. Been around it. Bagger times. Yeah, we know bullshit when we see it. We need context. Because if one of you mans... If I see a block of missing information in these things...

We're going to send for you. We're coming for you. We're going to send for you. And we're going to have to sign a contract because someone has to pay the P. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Someone has to pay the P. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Literally, yeah. Someone needs to pay for this. So we're going to get to the bottom of it and we need both of you to respect our verdict at the end of the day. Whatever we say goes. We're the judge. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're the judge. If we say, my man, it's your fault, you have to slide at the P. And we say, darling, I'm sorry.

it's your fault or no you didn't want to meet in the middle blah blah then we'll go from there cool cool cool cool we'll see oh i'm excited oh i'm excited you better send us the fucking reviews yeah because we never ask for check-ins yeah we never we don't we do sometimes we do but it never happens but this one has to happen yeah we need this we need this because this is recent this is very recent so i know you're both gonna watch this episode so yeah

Send us the reviews. Send us the reviews. Gang. Gang, gang, gang, gang, gang, gang, gang, gang. I'm excited. That's jokes. Shed some love over to our friends at Manscaped. So you already know it's the gifting season. Very true. You give and you get. Very true. So ladies, if you want that gush gush in the bed. That wet wet. That wet wet. That long schlong. That smooth criminal. Hmm.

get your boy the performance package 4.0 it comes with all the luxury details you already know what it is luxury details led light on the ting gets all the nooks and crannies anti-nick technology bro waterproof waterproof my g what else are you wanting what else are we looking for on the other side guys i already know what it's like on this time of the year they don't know what they want you ask what you want for christmas they're like oh you know what i like bro

She's going to think you're crazy, but get her the performance package as well. You want to axe that razor burn? She don't want that, innit? These yaks are tired of getting waxed and they're tired of shaving all the time. They hate that razor burn.

they don't know about manscaped it works it's gender neutral it works both ways yeah it's gender neutral double edged sword so um guys get the gift that keeps on giving yeah the code is sng sierra november golf sierra november golf 20 off free shipping worldwide you already know what it is hopping over there manscape.com and um you know enjoy christmas you said you want to play a game i was thinking about this on the train on the way down

So, actually no, that's a lie. I thought about it last night and then I continued it on the train. I've got one, two, three, four. I've only got eight so far. I want to do 10. But I wanted to see if you can guess the full names of certain anime characters. Guess? So I'm going to say the first name. I'm going to say the main name and see if you can guess the second name, if that makes sense. Okay, I'll try. So for example, Naruto. Uzumaki. Boom. Okay, cool. So it's not a guess.

What is a guess? Because you're guessing. But you know what I mean. I'm not guessing. But you're trying to remember. Okay. That's what I mean. That's what I mean. Sorry. Kuroku. Oh, Nobasket. Yeah. All right. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. So it's titles and characters and whatever. No, just guess. No, no, no, no, no. Not the name of the show. The name of the character. Oh, so Nobasket is not the name. No. I thought you were saying Nobasket for reference. Oh, right. No. Oh, Kuroko. No idea. Can you hazard a guess?

Koroka, Koroka. Nah fam, I have no idea. Tetsuya. It's all coming back in it. You're vexed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's pissed me off. Isn't Tetsuya his actual first name though? Yeah, but he's known as Koroka. So I put the main known name so it's easier for you to... Oh, okay. Because if I said Tetsuya, would you have gotten Koroka? Yeah, I wouldn't have. All right, cool, cool, cool. Fair play, fair play, fair play. Midoriya. He's right there. Yeah, I know fam. Midoriya. I just want to say Deku. I know you do. Midoriya.

You know I'm bad with names bro What's the big game with? I Izumaki? For some reason I knew you were going to say that but no it's wrong Because Izumaki is Naruto That's Uzumaki as well What is it? Izuku I knew it was his sign bro Alright cool This is going to go badly man I'm just going to get Naruto and that's it Ichigo See now I'm getting it mixed up with Kuroko

Close though. It is a K. Kurosaki? Yes, gang. All right, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Gang, gang, gang, gang, gang. You're getting there, you're getting there, you're getting there. All right. Hinata. Not Hinata from Naruto, by the way. Oh, okay. From Haiku. Haiku. Yeah. Hinata. What's it begin with? S.

Not my fucking idea. Shouyou. Shouyou. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't deal with this, bro. You're stressed. I can't deal with this, bro. All right, I'll give you an easy one. All right. Eren. Yeah, girl. Say less. Yeah, yeah. All right. Tanjiro. Tanjiro? Where's he from again? Jujutsu. No, no. That's a lie. He's from Demon Slayer. Oh, yeah. Tanjiro. The man did this.

Demon Slayer. Tanjiro. Oh, I don't know, man. Fuck. I don't know. What's it begin with? K. We all begin with K. I don't think I slept enough last night. I don't think I slept enough last night. I have no idea. Kamado. Kamado. I wasn't going to get that. I know you weren't. Speaking of, I've got one more. But speaking of, apparently Demon Slayer is out.

Apparently. Right now? Yeah. But I've not searched it. I saw it on Twitter. I said, oh, Demon Slayer New Season's out, but I've not searched. But we'll have a look. Last one. Itadori. Itadori from My Hero. No. Where's it from? Jiu-Jitsu. Oh, of course it is. Does it begin with K as well? No. What's it begin with? Y. UG. Yes.

That was terrible. You got four out of eight though. That's not that bad. Okay. That's not that bad. I wanted to do 10, but I couldn't think of that. Jesus Christ. I'll do more another time. I'll think of fucking out. I'm so bad with names. It's painful. I know. It's painful. I need satin. You need like an image. Yeah. I need something to help my brain work, bro. Cause it's just not, it's not brain in.

It's just not working. Your braid is not braided. Yeah, that was just a quick little game. All right, cool. I'm annoyed about that. I know you are. I did a, um, a friends quiz the other day. I know too much about friends. Okay. Oh, the actual show friends. Oh, I was thinking, okay. Yeah. Do you remember some of the questions? Do you watch a lot of friends? I've seen it all. You've seen it all? I've seen it all like twice. Oh, okay. Let's do a very quick friends quiz. Gang, let's do that. You've done all of these ones already, right? Yeah, I've done them all. Do you remember what you, what you got? Like the score or whatever? Uh,

I think I got two wrong. Out of? I can't even remember. Hang on. Oh, maybe this is different ones. I don't think this is the same one as me. Okay, calm. It's fine. All right, cool. So I won't know. So this is the one you have to answer it, but then I won't get the answers till the end. Okay? Okay. All right. Okay. We'll smash for it quickly. Okay. Question one. Why does Monica throw a Christmas summer party during season two?

Because the rest of the gang are depressed because Joey refuses to eat anything but ice cream. Oh, it's options. Yeah. Thank the Lord. Because she wants to find a good looking date because her heating system breaks. Say them again. Sorry. Because the rest of the gang are depressed. Yes. Because Joey refuses to eat anything but ice cream. Yeah. Because she wants to find a good looking date or because her heating breaks. Probably the third one. Because she wants to find a good looking date. Yeah. I feel like that's Monica's energy.

That is her energy, I feel like. What does the holiday armadillo want Ben to learn about in the season seven Christmas episode? Okay. Ross's new girlfriend, how to be emotionally open, paleontology or his Jewish heritage? I think it's either C or D. Say the question again. What does the holiday armadillo want Ben to learn about? The Jewish heritage. Cool.

Which festive outfit does Phoebe dress up in to collect money for charity? The Grinch, an elf, Santa or a reindeer? I was going to say Santa. I think it is Santa. Okay. I think so. Because I remember she stood outside like a shop with a ting, with a bucket ting. I remember. Which of Ross's girlfriends freaks him out by suggesting they sent out a holiday card together? Mona, Elizabeth, Charlie or Bonnie? I don't remember any of them. I don't even know who they are.

Ross's girlfriends he's had girlfriends he has so I'm pretty sure if I remember correctly I can't remember Charlie's the black one I know that was in later seasons yeah yeah Bonnie I'm pretty sure it's Phoebe's friend that shaved her head or is that Mona is one of them thingies um sister he dated Rachel's sister as well no oh isn't that one of them is that what the name is again Mona Elizabeth Charlie and Bonnie I think Elizabeth is the English chick no yeah I think so

bonnie the black chick who was the other two mona and mona and bonnie elizabeth and charlie and the question is fucking out bro you're taking on with this i'm trying to think bro i'm trying to win here the only reason i'm saying is because we're eight percent of the way through this is gonna take all day oh jesus sorry fam um let's just go with bonnie all right cool why is it so long fam can i not skip to the end

Why is this one so long? Phoebe is distraught when she sees old Christmas trees being thrown in the chipper. How do Monica and Joey make her feel better? Convincing her that trees are happy in heaven by breaking the chipper, by taking her to plant a new tree, or by buying all the old trees? Probably the first one. Cool. I think Phoebe's gullible at that. In season six, Rachel and Phoebe search Monica's apartment to find out what she has bought them for Christmas. Where do they find the presents? Phoebe.

I do remember this episode as well. What are the options? Under the window seat, behind the fridge, in her closet or in the roof space. I think it's the window seat. Yeah. I think it's the window seat. Cool. I know all of these. Apart from that girlfriend one, I think I've got more right. During season three, Ross accidentally causes a girl scout to break her leg during her Christmas cookie run. How did he make it up to her?

uh getting everyone to sign their name on a uh on her cast dressing up as santa and bringing her the presents selling the cookies himself or buying her a ticket to visit nasa i think it was sending the cook to see it was i can't tell you it was uh in season i'm gonna try and make this last one this is going on for too long season nine the gang are faced with the prospect of spending christmas presents spending christmas day without chandler why can't chandler be there

So in season nine, the gang are faced with the prospect of spending Christmas without Chandler. Why can't he be there? He refuses to celebrate Christmas. He and Monica have broken up. He got trapped in an ATM vestibule. He's working in Tulsa. The last one. Working in Tulsa. Cool. Right. How do I skip to the end so we can see what we got? Because this has taken all fucking day.

I wasn't expecting some of these questions, boy. Or those kind of questions. Fucking hell. They're hard, no? Yeah, man. I thought they were going to be easy things. I feel like this is going to be a massive waste of time because... You have to do them all before you can see the score? Yeah, I don't think it's going to let me do it. And we're literally 18% through. That's going to take an hour to get through. Yeah, we'll figure it out. See which ones worked. Can I go back? Because I can tell you got something wrong. But no, you did okay. I'm pretty sure...

Phoebe was an elf. Okay. I think she was an elf. But you're right when she was standing outside with the ting. I remember when she was standing. And some guy put a cigarette butt in her bucket. Yeah, I remember that. The Christmas seat for the presents was correct. I know that. You got the Christmas tree wrong wrong with Phoebe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was, they bought all those trees. Okay. And she walks in and all the fucking trees are in the yard. Okay. It's ridiculous. You were right about Ben's Jewish heritage. Mm-hmm.

I can't remember what any of the other ones were. The girlfriend one, I have no fucking idea. Christmas card? I have no idea which one that was. Oh, actually, Ross's girlfriend was one of them. Mona, Charlie, Bonnie, and someone else. Elizabeth, you said. Yeah, which one was... Maybe... Actually, no. Okay.

Which one was Bruce Willis' daughter? I feel like that might have been Elizabeth. I don't remember, bro. I remember the Bruce Willis' daughter incident where they go to that stay-away vacation place. Spring Break team. Spring Break. And Ross rocks up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. On the MTV team. Wasteman. I remember. Wasteman. I remember. And he's hiding under the bed when Bruce Willis comes in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember. For the life of me, I'll never remember her name, though. But yeah, yeah. Jesus. That was a bit tough. Fam?

Ridiculous. Another waste of time because we don't even know what we got. So guys, sorry, that's two wasted games. Apologies. We tried to spice it up. It went terribly wrong. I can't think of anyone's name to save my life and I couldn't get the answers to Fuhad's friends quiz. So ruined. Ruined. That's what you get when you don't prepare and then you try and think of something on the cuff, off the cuff even. I said on the cuff one time in a TikTok clip and someone buried me in the comments. Really? Yeah, it was harsh. But c'est la vie.

So I've got two little things. First, someone sent us in. Well, actually, I say someone, a few, a good few people sent us in this TikTok of a woman asking what's the most embarrassing stuff said during sex. Okay. And the comment section. I'm here for it already. I'm here for it already. So let me actually open the TikTok and see what it says.

So what's the most embarrassing thing you've done during sex? Answer in the comments. Bro, these comments. Right. Stuttered whilst talking dirty and got embarrassed. No. Fam? That would ruin the whole. That's an ick, bro. Bro. That would ruin the whole thing. Stuttered. Nah. Nah. Nah. Nah. Locked the whole thing. Fam? That's hilarious. Horrible.

Chupapi Meneño when he put it in. Fan? Man, lined up the teeth. Say that again. Have you ever heard that before? Chupapi Meneño? No. Chupapi Meneño? You never heard that? Nah, bro. What the fuck is that? Because you said it with conf. That's why I said say it again. Chupapi Meneño? You can say it as many times as you want. I've never heard that before. Fuck.

You have to say it like that. As in the yacht said that? Or the guy said that? What the fuck does that even mean? It doesn't mean... What is it? What is that? Stop! Stop! I don't know what that is. It doesn't mean...

I'm itching, bro. It doesn't mean anything. Okay. It's just a dumb reaction noise. Okay. So it's just like, how do I explain it?

It's just a weird, sus kind of bullshit reaction noise. Okay. So I can't think of a good example. Okay. But it's supposed to just ruin everything. Okay. Do you know what I mean? Okay. It's one of them. Okay. Makes sense. That makes sense. It's the kind of noise that if you were sitting in a room by yourself...

and I was hiding in the closet, I would scream that to the top of my lungs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah. It's just weird. It's just a dumb, weird, stupid TikTok thing. Never heard of it. You've never heard Chupapi Meneño? No. That surprises me. No. That surprises me. You get that on the PlayStation all the time. When you've just got the open chat on, and people chat shit online, Chupapi Meneño is number one. Say less. Um... Oh...

Told him I loved him and he went soft. Bro. My girl said, I love you. And man's tool said, nah, that's too much. Fuck. That's embarrassing. Fam? That's embarrassing. And I don't blame women sometimes, you know, because sometimes when they're heat at the moment and they're getting good dick.

The L bar just leaves your lips. It just drops out. It's not their fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's practically our fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fam? Ah, it's out of order. He went soft. That's not even in his control either. It's a mental thing. Fuck. Wow. There's issues all over the gaff there. This one's clean. This one's clean. But...

My girl said, I fell off the bed while he was eating me out. And he said, five second rule. That's 10-10. That's life. That's 10. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. Oh, this one. He said, arch your back. And I went the wrong way. She did this thing. It took me a second. It took me a second. Yuck. Yuck. No.

Fam, I'll spank her coccyx and leave. I'll slap it down, bro. A donkey puncher. Fam, her lumbar will get cracked. Nah. Fuck. Oh, that's disgusting. Arch your back. Sing. This hunch, sing. I couldn't see it. That's embarrassing. That's embarrassing. That's embarrassing. See it from a bird's eye? Fam? It's embarrassing. That's where the peach concaves. You don't want that. Fam?

I'm saying babes don't make it that way. Oh, yuck. Oh, that's hilarious. That's hilarious. Went the other way. That's hilarious. Nutted in my mouth and I gagged for five minutes straight. Damn, son.

Damn, son. Fam? Damn, son. If that happened to me, you'll see me in the covers like that. That's awkward for both parties. I'll be sweating, bruv. Nut in her mouth and she's... Five minutes. That's ages, bro. Just vomit if you're going to vomit. If you're going to vomit, fucking vomit. Oh my God. Imagine. I'm like... Babes. Fam, you have to... He sat there just...

Your diet is yuck. Yeah, you need to change something within you. You need to change something. Nah, fam. You're eating like a slave. Imagine five minutes, fam. I'm like, all right, man. We fucking get it. We fucking get it. Yeah, man, that's gross. Let's laugh it up.

Let's laugh it up, man. That tastes like shit. We get it. That's hilarious. That's so embarrassing. I would have to walk out. I'm not staying the whole five minutes. If she gags more than six times, I'm out. I'm walking the fuck out. Oh my God. Actually, good question. Have you ever had a girl spit it out? Not like in your presence or anything, but like go and spit it out? Not that I can recall. I have when I was younger. Okay.

The thing is, she had, it was a weird one because she had no issue with me nutting her mouth. She just didn't want to swallow it, which is fine. But in that process of where you just nut in someone's mouth and they're like, and they just walk off to the bathroom. Is that how she did it? Yeah. She would. How else are you going to do it? I thought you meant like sexually, like spit it on. I thought that's what you meant. No. She literally got up and spat it out and came back to the room. Yeah. Nah, brother. That's never happened to me.

I wouldn't have to process that. She was very polite about it. I just don't want to swallow nut. And I'm like, that's fair. That's a fair thing to say. But when you get up and spit it in the sink, I'm just... Wow. Thank God I've already nutted because we wouldn't be doing anything. Yeah, yeah. It's done. It's done after that. I mean, she used to love sucking dick and she refused for you to just not nut in the mouth.

But it's just, she just didn't want to swallow it. And I'm like, I guess that's fine. It is what it is, I guess. It is, but just like, it's very embarrassing. No, it's never, ever, ever happened to me before. It's only happened with that one girl and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I've already seen it. Fam, he looked up whilst eating me out, so I waved at him. No. This one. No, I did this. I did this.

That's worse. Fam, imagine. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. Oh, nah, man. Nah, man. That kills everything. Everything. But I'll be sweeted. So would I. We're not fucking tonight. Just so you know. I'll be sweeted, but it's like, I'm clearly not eating you well enough. Oh, you're just neutral. You're here. You're not lost. You're present. Exactly. You're not lost. And that doesn't sit well with me. You know what I mean?

That just doesn't sit well with me. That you've still got the cognitive coherence to look down and wave at me. Yeah, fam.

You can respond to emails. You're blessed. It would be fucking hilarious to me. But I'd be livid at the same time. You're mad coherent. You're mad coherent. Nah, nah, nah. Yeah, that's unacceptable behaviour. Very unacceptable behaviour. Fucking hell. That reminds me of Master of None. Okay. Where there's an episode of Master of None where he's eating out his missus, Rachel. And then just while she's in there, she's ready to pop. Okay. Man pokes his head out the covers. I think this is about... And man's like, how's it going? That rings a bell. Yeah.

funny as shit but ruins everything she wanted to knock him out I can imagine fucking hilarious I need to get into the character for this one right fuck he wanted to go under the blankets then said not even the ghosts can see us what the flying fuck

Imagine. What the f***? He would have gotten dry like that. Fam. Like that. Absorbed all the moisture in the air. Like that. Not even the ghosts can see us. No. Oh, shame on you, sir. No, no. It's probably his second or third time smashing, period. Bro. Oh, God. Last one. He covered my face with a pillow. Just there. Fam. Just suffocating the b***h. Nah. Nah. That's uncalled for. That's an uncalled for kink.

smothering thing nah bruv I can see where your head's at yeah but you can't do that my girl will die she will die my girl will die um fuck that give me a sec right oh my head hurts now my stomach is rumbling James I heard it Jesus I heard it bro I don't know why you keep getting subways it's not filling fam it's not filling stop eating subways it's not even real meat stop

Fuck off, James. I'm content with the food I had. I'm not going to lie to you. I'm content. I need food now. Now. Wait, fam. We're nearly done. We're on camera. Stop talking about yourself. Right. Okay, cool. I've got more icks. Ridiculous amount. Actually, not even that many icks, but it's getting ridiculous. Okay. But before that, I said on the Patreon episode I gave myself a ick last week. I gave myself another ick yesterday. Okay. Okay.

I'm confident in myself as a person and my flaws. So I can say this with chest and I embrace men. Just own your eggs in it. Yeah. Oh, I said it before as well about when I'm eating and it just runs down my beard and blah, blah, blah. Yeah. Own your eggs. You have at this point, there's so many of them. You just have to face your eggs head on. Yeah. And just, just if you're in that situation, it's like, oh no, when I skate in the other week,

I was icking fam I was just there Bambi fam And I just thought There's literally nothing I can do about it I'm just giving everyone the ick And you know what Fuck it We can't please everybody Fam So your boy Was driving the other day Bro I'm not gonna lie to you I had to bust doo doo fam I had to Like my stomach was aching It happens It happens As it does So pulled up BP garage Yeah Service station Pulled up

Ran into the toilet. Did my thing. As I'm there, so boxers down, trousers down. As I'm there, they must have a motion detector thing. The lights cut out. It was pitch black Fuhad. Pitch black. I haven't wiped, haven't done anything. And I'm sat on the bowl. Legs in. Hand like on one thing. And I'm here like this.

fam the team weren't turning on the team was not turning on I was locked in this pitch black cubicle just waving fam waving knees buckled fucking waving at anyone fam I was this close this close help this fucking close bro if I didn't have my phone torched on me literally would have been there like help help

That's hilarious. But the worst part was I was thinking if someone walks in, they're going to know the lights weren't on. And then they're going to find out that I was in here with the lights fucking off. And they're going to think, what's going on? What's going on? What in the glory hole is going on in here? The glory hole?

You can't make me laugh. Bro. My stomach's hurting. What in the glory hole is going on the fuck here? That's hilarious. But yeah, anyway, that's my ick. I own it with my chest. Guys, when we call your name, own it. Because these are coming hot and fast, bro. So when you find your ick, raise your hand and own it, yeah? Okay. That's hilarious. So...

Fam, the visual of this. It's annoying because you know my barber's, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. My barber's got the same thing in his toilet. It's a motion detector thing for the lights. But it cuts off literally three seconds after you walk in. It's fucking annoying. Just get a switch. So I'm pissing now and it cuts off and I'm all like this. But sometimes if I wave, it doesn't. So I have to step back and step forward. It's like, I'm pissing, big man. It's so annoying. So annoying. Cuts off after three seconds all the time. That is fucking annoying. Makes no sense.

But yeah Alright let's get through These icks guys Guys I'm sorry Fam I'm sorry And the thing is You know what yeah We've said before about Girls versus guys icks Etc etc etc And guys are sending in A few more icks But they're just not funny enough Yeah they're not cutting it They're just not funny enough They're not cutting it They're valid They're just not funny enough And they're played out It's the same one Over and over again Women are Like the women in heels Buckling Yeah Every day we get that I saw that today I saw that one today We get it every day Yeah We've been seeing that G Yeah

We need like fucking Chris Hemsworth to tell us some icks because he's drowning in puss. I need Dan Bilzerian in here. He's got a book full of icks, clearly. Dan, I know you're watching. Let us in on some icks, bro, because these men, knee palms so bad, they can't think of nothing else but buckling heels. Man said, I know you're watching. That's jokes. Second biggest pod in the world. I know you're current. Of course you're watching. Right. Icks, yeah? This is more TikTok icks.

Oh, God. When he's waiting for the life... Wait. I can't even say it. When he's waiting for the lifeguard to let him go down the slide. I saw that, brother. I saw... He's just there on the slide. I'm just waiting. Waiting. There's a whistling hand. I saw... Women are cutthroat. Women are fucking cutthroat. Right. Next up. When he's trying to walk next to his friends, but the path is too narrow.

So he has to step back. Step off the curb, wait till they walk past and step behind them. Oh, my days, yeah. Oh, that's fucking embarrassing. You're a baiter. When you have to walk behind your friends, you're a baiter. You're fighting for that piece of curb. That's... That gets me angry. I hear that. That'll lick my chest. I hear that. Oh, this one's sweet. So fucking specific, bro. When he uses the chocolate box menu to pick a chocolate... I saw that too!

I like what I like in it. Why is that in it, brother? I like what I like. When you refer to the menu, looking for that truffle, that caramel. Oh, let me be, cuz. Oh, that's hilarious. I saw that one as well. That's fucking hilarious. That's jokes. I need to find which ones have jam so I can avoid them. That's what I'm looking for. That's jokes, man. That's so specific. When he stalls the car.

I can imagine. I can imagine that being an egg for a woman. It's an egg for me, bro. Especially when it jolts. The suspension lets you rock in it for a second as well. It's embarrassing. Fuck. Thank God for water mics. This is me. I raised my hand. This is me. This is me. My name's been called. They called me out. When he eats something hot and does the...

That's Bella to a T. Sweat on. The thing, Bella never waits for the food. Like if she wants something, she wants it now. Same. If I'm cooking rice and peas, she goes to the pot. She doesn't blow the spoon. My tongue's burned from yesterday. I told you. I'm like, come on, bro. I sucked the stew yesterday. My tongue's blistered, bro. I'm bare. That,

That's me to a tee. That's hilarious. I blow to my heart's content. I blow to my heart's content and then I chew. I'm not on it like that. Nah, fam. I think if you blow it more than twice, ick. If you've got the ladle and the third, ick. Man up and slurp the ting, fam. Taste it. Fucking hell, I'm sweating. I am sweating. Oh no, I've lost it. Where's it gone?

Fam, when he swims towards you, that to me is an incredible ick. And I'll tell you why, bro. Hit me. I need context. I need to visualize it. This isn't swimming towards you, but when I was on... This has to be holiday based, right? This has to be holiday. This is not public pool. This is hotel pool, right? Or beach. So...

When I went to Ayia Napa years ago, there was one chick selling tickets. We were in the sea, fam. I'm talking a good hundred meters out. But it's shallow. So there was one chick selling tickets. She clocked us from miles away from the beach. We saw her at direct line walk all the way from the sand into the water. As the water got up to knee height,

waist height walking not swimming stomach height walking t-height walking until she literally got two feet away from us and then she was like she took one stroke she walked the whole way took one stroke i was like hi fam most hilarious thing of it me and my boys ripped her a new asshole bro walked the entire way one breaststroke oh hi

So as soon as I read that, that's what I reminded me of. Fair enough. If you clock a Donnie from across the hotel pool preying you and then swims all the way over, ah, disgusting. I can imagine. That's not something I've ever seen or experienced or witnessed. I've never seen it apart from that. I can imagine. I can imagine. Ah, right. Last one. This one's peak. When the automatic door doesn't open, so he has to do the quick back and forth. LAUGHTER

Fam, walking up to a door that doesn't acknowledge you as a human is the most embarrassing thing. Acknowledge you as a human. When you have to back up, wait, and then go again. Oh, you're not a man. Oh, that's annoying. When a robot doesn't think you're a human being, you're not a man. That's annoying. I can imagine. That's annoying. You don't even have enough presence, fam. You don't have enough presence to detect motion. Fucking hell, I've thought of a nick for myself. I've done this many a times.

I'm, because it just reminded me when you said walk up to the door and walking back. I've been walking on my phone trying to find a spot, not knowing where it is. You walk, walk, walk with conf and you think, fuck, I'm going the wrong way.

I'm going the wrong way. He just immediately turned around. Oh, it's jarring. I've done it a pair of times. When you have to turn around in a public place, I feel like everyone knows. Everyone. Everyone knows. Everyone around me knows that this motherfucker's going the wrong way. You slowly turn. You say, fuck. And then you turn the opposite direction. I'm waiting for someone to be like, nah, you're lost. I'm waiting for Nelson from The Simpsons to just, ha, ha, ha.

where's fanny's last oh it's so jarring it's so jarring that's my personal ick i feel for you because i've done it bear times oh i bet that's why i don't walk anymore fam i'm in the whip and i'll do a big circle back yeah fuck but anyway guys as we said hold your head high raise your hand if you got called out and um we'll see you on the next one we love you very much patrons see you on thursday um yeah man love love love gang again

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ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Hi, I'm Zibby Owens, and I am the host of the award-winning podcast, Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books.

I have daily author interview podcasts, over 1,600 of them that I've recorded over the last five years. Hear from all your favorite bestselling authors, celebrities, and more. Even if you're too busy to read the books. Moms don't have time to read books. Again, that's moms don't have time to read books. Listen today. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. ACAST.com.