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cover of episode 872. Q&AF: Too Focused, Approaching Senior Leadership & Switching Industries In Business

872. Q&AF: Too Focused, Approaching Senior Leadership & Switching Industries In Business

2025/4/28
logo of podcast REAL AF with Andy Frisella

REAL AF with Andy Frisella

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What is up guys? It's Andy Purcell and this is the show for the realest. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today

We have Q and AF. That's where you submit the questions or call in the show and we answer them. Now you can submit your questions a few different ways. First way is guys, you can keep emailing these questions in to ask Andy at andyforsella.com or you can go to the link in this video right down there, click on it, fill it out,

and be on the call-in show. - Click that shit. - Is that correct? - That is, yeah. - All right, I'm just learning this new, this whole new thing, you know what I'm saying? - Technology. - That's right. - Yeah. - I'm going to become a technology mogul. - Yeah. - People don't understand that yet, but we're gonna see. I'm gonna show everybody how you can not know shit and then become the fucking man. - And learn it. - Yeah. It's called learning. - Yep.

So yeah, that's what we're going to do today. Q and a F. Oh yeah. Yeah. Tomorrow we're going to have CTI. That is cruise the internet. That is our current event show. That's where we talk about what's going on. We throw stuff up on the screen. We speculate, we laugh, we have a good time. We talk about what's true and what's not true. And, uh,

Then we talk about what we're going to do about these problems going on in the world. Other times we're going to have real talk. Real talk is just five, 20 minutes to give them some real talk. And then we have 75 hard versus. That's where people have completed the 75 hard program, come on the show, talk about how they were before, how they are now, and how they used the 75 hard program to change the dumpster fire of a life into a non-dumpster fire life. Right? That's right. Yeah.

If you're unfamiliar with 75 Hard, you've been living under a rock. Let's be real. So here's the deal. It's the initial phase of the Live Hard program. It's the most popular mental transformation program ever. And you get it for free at episode 208 on the audio feed. That's 208 on the audio feed. There's also a book at andyprosella.com called The Book on Mental Toughness. You can get that as well. It's not required. The program's free. Do it.

p.s share the show don't be a hoe share the show all right what's up home skillet nothing what's up dude what's going on man oh just doing the thing yeah i always look i look forward to these uh these episodes here

Look forward to every episode. I mean, but yeah, like yeah same same but like that's the same You're saying that you selectively prefer. I like the Q&A episodes I like the Q&A is because like no like that's when people like we see the stuff we break it down on CTIs like it has its importance but like what we do about that matters on this episode, that's right report on Call-ins on CTI to change the game right there

We got to get some liberals to call in. Get some of these Karens to call in. Bro, that's who we need. And argue with. That's who we need. Yeah, it'd be awesome. Bro, we need them so bad. Yeah. And like, oh. If you know a smart Karen, have her call in. Yeah, joke's on you. Yeah, I know. Because there's no such thing. Yeah, doesn't exist. Yeah. Yeah, fuck. All right, man. Yeah, well, let's make some people better today. Let's do it. Let's make some people better. We got, we got, we're going with a call in first.

We got a guy named Drew whose question is kind of centered around being hyper-disciplined. So let's dive into this a little bit. Let's give Drew a call. Let's check this out. It's a weird ring. Hello? Drew, what's going on, my man? Yo, what's up? This is DJ, brother. How are you? I'm doing good. How you doing, DJ? I'm all right, man. Yeah, we got the boss here. What's up, Drew? What's up, Andy? How you doing, brother? I'm doing good, bro. How are you?

Man, phenomenal. Can't complain. Just got a sick arm pump in. Couldn't be better, right? That's what's up, dude. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Yeah, let's go. Just an arm pump? Yeah, bro, it's Friday. We do arms on Friday because it's curls for the girls. My man Drew knows what the fuck he's doing. Well, he said arm, like singular arm pump. No, I'm like, listen, you don't know the whole game. Really excited for the call. Yeah, see, Drew understands the game. Clear.

Clearly. You train arms on Friday so that when you go to do your thing on Friday night, you look extra swole. Got it. That's what it's all about. Obviously. Yeah, for sure. For sure. All right. DJ. It makes sense. Drew, tell us a little bit about yourself. Come on, DJ. Tell us a little bit about yourself. All right. Yeah.

So, yeah, so I'm 25 years old. You know, I live in Washington, D.C. right now with my fiance. And I wasn't born and raised here. I grew up in North Florida, but, you know, that's neither here nor there. But, you know, I'd say since about 2020, I've been just extremely dialed in. You know, started following the podcast back then.

And, you know, I've honestly just been a student of discipline and, you know, been doing the 75 cards religiously for years now. And I hear you talk about it all the time, how, you know, being this way has kind of turned you into a hermit where, you know, after you get yourself done for the day, you almost

you know, you don't want to do anything. And so I feel like, you know, prefacing that I'm about to get married this October. Um, I find myself a lot of times kind of, you know, easily saying no to whether it's, you know, social occasions or things that my significant other wants to go do. And, um,

It's kind of one of those things that I do and I feel like I shouldn't do. Like, I'm cognizant that I'm doing it, but I know I shouldn't. And I'm just kind of wondering how whenever you and Emily were first getting together and, you know, you were still, you know, making your climb to the top, how you kind of implemented time with her and, you know, made it a point to show that she's, you know, a big part of your life and, you know, a part of your success. Well, Drew, okay.

So let me just clarify what you're saying. So you're saying that you've been, are you following the Live Hard program or are you just doing 75 hard or how are you doing it? So I've done the Live Hard before, but typically I'm just doing about two 75 hards a year. You know, I mean, but even when I'm not doing 75 hard, I'm still kind of just like a hermit year round. Like

No, I never want to go out and drink. I never want to go out and do social occasions. I've become very quick to say no when it comes to going and doing fun things. And after I'm done with my tasks for the day, I kind of just want to go home and do nothing. But I just understand how that could be not great in a relationship or not a good way to have a marriage. Okay. So...

Let me unpack this for you. All right. First of all, I think you're thinking of it a very healthy way. Okay. Most people don't suck at life because they have too much discipline. It's the other thing. Okay. It's the other way. Most people's lives suck because they have no discipline. So we often talk about the...

benefits of being disciplined. But what we have to understand is the reason that we want to develop the skill of discipline is so that we can improve the quality of life that we have for ourselves and our family. So if that costs us the rest of our social life and our friends and our family and everything,

is it really worth that you know that's not the point of it the point of it is to gain the power to adhere to a plan so that we can lay out any plan in front of us and execute it and right now your plan a big part of your plan is i want to have a good relationship with my fiance and my future wife

And I found myself not doing that because I feel like I'm focused over here in this other area. We don't do 75 hard or live hard for the sake of doing it. We do it so we have the power to make decisions. And the decisions that you need to make are decisions that

When I, just like in the beginning, when I don't feel like working out, I'm going to go work out. Okay. And how many times do you regret those workouts? None. So I'm going to offer a perspective change for you. Your perspective change is this. Instead of looking at, you need to deny yourself these experiences. And that's what equates to you being disciplined.

you actually have to flip discipline over and apply it to that area of your life. Meaning,

If you know that you need to spend time or you know you need to be social or you know you need to go be a normal human, that needs to be a conscious decision that you make and not the feeling of, oh, I'm failing or I'm compromising my success or I'm, you know, doing something that's bad. You need to look at your power of discipline that you have clearly developed as something that you can apply to your personal life as well. So,

When you know you need to do these things like spend time with your wife, go on a vacation, go to dinner, all these things, that is just you making a conscious decision that is no different than you making the conscious decision to go work out when you didn't feel like it back when you were just starting this. Does that make sense? Mm-hmm.

Yeah, yeah, that makes good sense. Okay, so realize this, bro. There's no trophy for being, you know, an obsessive hermit, all right? When I say I'm a hermit, like...

That's it's it's not how it sounds. Okay, I I have I'm surrounded in the public all the time I'm around people all the fucking time like You know, it's it's really my only time where I'm not around people So, you know, that's that's what I mean when I say that but I broke the whole point of the live hard lifestyle is not to control your life it's so that you can take control of your life and when you take control of your life and

Part of that control is how do I treat my friends? How do I treat my relationships? You know, we have all these people out here that say you got to sacrifice everything to become successful. And that's actually not true at all. You just have to be effective every single day for years on end. But being effective into a well-rounded life also means making conscious decisions to spend with family, friends, and loved one, even if you don't feel like it. So, um,

Just flip the perspective, brother. You know, you need to, you're in your twenties. Yes. You need to hustle. Yes. You need to grind. Yes. You need to build. You've already clearly built a skill that you didn't have a while ago and you become aware of the skill that you possess. And most people never do that. Not at any age. So you're way ahead of the game, dude. So let's take this fear that you have of like,

you know, I gotta be hyper obsessed. I've gotta be super focused. You already have the fucking skill. So now your job is just to maintain the skill by practicing it throughout your life. Okay. So take the skill that you've had. And instead of saying, you know, I have to go work out because I don't feel like it. Go over here and say, I have to spend time with my family, even though I don't feel like it right now. And then just like a workout, uh,

after the time is spent, you're going to feel like it was good. You're not going to regret it. So we have to understand, dude, that hypervigilance and hyperdiscipline to the point where it sacrifices every other area of your life

is not only not healthy, but it's not required. You don't need to do it that way. And that's the whole point of the powerless system. You know, I'm sure you're familiar with that, you know? Yeah. So, so when I say this to you, what do you think? Um, I mean, it, it thinks it sounds like everything that I've kind of been telling myself, but

It's just one of the things that's hard to implement. I've even been brainstorming a little bit and thinking maybe it's something I add to my power list where every day I do something to just go out of my way and either, whether it's something small, just spend some time with either her or family members and whatnot. That's exactly how you should be thinking of it. You should be thinking of it.

Look, and I know this sounds cold and I know this sounds non-organic to most people, but when you're a high achiever and you're driven and you're trying to, you have to schedule intentional time for those things, just like you would schedule time to do anything else. So that's exactly the whole, you're understanding the concept very well that the purpose of the power list is

is so that we can address areas of our life that need to be addressed. They don't all have to be career focused, okay? If you know that you're struggling in your personal relationships, then yes, that should be one of your tasks that is critical to the, you know, the development of your life. A lot of times we talk about the critical tasks

People automatically think, you know, because you say the critical tasks that are going to move you forward, they automatically equate that to your career. But your career is not the only aspect of your life. So if you're struggling in an area such as your friends or your loved ones or social, that should become part of the power list that you work to correct yourself back and push yourself from that state of hyper execution into a state of, you know,

well, strong execution where it matters consistently across, you know, all segments of your life. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That makes perfect sense. Yeah, bro. You're listen, the problem you're experiencing is the complete opposite of what most people experience. And I'm glad you called in with this question because, you know, a lot of people I think do get lost in the idea of, uh,

you know hyper vigilance in terms of execution but like bro there's there's also a lot of people who think that who aren't that you know there's a lot not even close to that yeah right exactly like they're that's their excuse drew's got it yeah

I can hear it. Yeah, me too. I can hear it, dude. Does that make sense? Like, dude, you know, the people, the reason we don't talk about it a lot is because every single fucking lazy motherfucker will cling to that as an excuse. Oh, dude. My provision. Yeah. I'm disciplined to a point. Well, bro, you're clearly not. You're fat as fuck. You're broke. Your fucking shit sucks. You know, like. Not there yet. Yeah, you're not there, dude. Yeah. So. 100%. Yeah. So we don't talk about this, uh,

you know, because honestly the 99% of people are in the other camp, but you know, this is definitely a question that very high achievers are going to relate to. This is a question that gets asked a lot in Arte in terms of how do I balance my family with my entrepreneurial ambitions? And you know, the truth of the matter is, is we have to recognize that that's a weak point. We have to use the systematic tools that we have and the skills that we've developed to

to make conscious decisions that put us in a place to round our life out to be more of what we want and less of what we don't want. So, bro, you're not, I think you're feeling it real good. You're getting it real good. And just use the skill you've built to make a better life in that area. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah.

Sweet, man. Well, Drew, appreciate you, man. Yeah, good, bro. Listen, the whole point of this program is to enhance the quality of life by consciously allowing you to control the controllables. All right? Most people float through life...

like a paper bag, bro. They just blow in the wind. They have no idea what's going on. They have no idea that they actually have control. They have no ability to make a decision that's going to benefit them further than five minutes ahead of them. And...

Once you develop the skill set to be able to do that, we have to apply it to build a quality life. And a quality life does not exist just from monetary income. It exists of many different segments across one's life. And the skill set of discipline applies to all of them. So just use the skill that you've built, bro, just like you know how to do into the other areas of life. Yeah.

Yeah, I'll definitely do that. I think adding it to the power list is going to be something I do. Yeah. You know, starting today, even, you know, it's Friday. I'm sure she'll want to go do something. There you go, bro. Yeah. I do have one other kind of small question that piggybacks a little bit if y'all have time. Yep.

Yeah, go ahead. So, well, it's kind of about, it's something similar. It's just like, you know, being, you know, a very disciplined person and practicing this stuff all the time has made me super, super prideful, even about small stuff. And, you know, I'm sure, I'm sure you guys understand, like, it can be even something small and I'm just like, you know, I'm willing to scorched earth over it, you know, small, stupid arguments, you know? And so, I was just wondering if you had any, any,

Any tips on, you know, what you do about small stuff and just being so prideful from, you know, just being the way you are and just being, you know, a disciplined person and kind of growing that sort of pride, even when it comes to small stuff. Yeah. Well, first of all, you should be proud of having high standards. That's a that's a fucking great thing. Most people don't. OK, you made a decision years ago.

To live at a higher standard, okay? And there's no nobility at living less than the highest standard that you can.

It's biblical, honestly. So if you have made a decision to live at a high standard, you are going to constantly be surrounded by people who either haven't developed that yet or who are never going to develop that because they lack the awareness to do so. So what that means is you're running at a high standard and other people around you aren't. And what you're saying is you get annoyed with that. Is that what you're saying?

Yeah, well, it can just be, I feel like I have such a hard time being wrong about stuff. And so it's kind of more like swallowing my pride, even when it comes to small stuff, even just like, you know, a dumb argument with friends or dumb things like that. Well, are you wrong? Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Are you? Are you? So what? Is this a different thing? So are you wrong when these things happen?

potentially okay listen let that go bro that it's okay to be it's okay to be wrong all right the one of the best things i ever did in my whole entire life was to let go of the idea that it like was made me look bad to be wrong like when i'm wrong bro i've up talks in front of thousands of people on stage

And I've been like, well, I was wrong about that. And I just move on. Like, look, dude, everybody's wrong. Nobody's perfect. You're carrying high standards for yourself. And you're thinking that that means never being wrong. If you if you were never wrong, you can't learn.

So, humble yourself to the point where it's okay to be wrong so that you can learn the lesson moving forward. You know, one of the biggest character flaws that hurts entrepreneurs and success-driven people is that their ego and their hubris gets them in a place where they can't accept being wrong. And what that does is that it prevents them from learning. And then we run into a whole other set of issues from that. So, look, bro. Mm-hmm.

You got high standards. You're proud of those high standards. That's great. Other people aren't going to like that by default. You're going to constantly be annoyed because people are going to do small things, stupid things, annoying things. But, you know, when you're wrong, just say you're wrong, bro.

It's super simple. Be like, all right, cool. I'm wrong. And let it go. It sounds like a 25-year-old. Bro, you're fucking 25, motherfucker. I'm 30. What the fuck? It sounds like you. I'm just 25. It's a young thing, man. I have a hard time being wrong. It's okay, dude. Being wrong, being able to admit that you're wrong and correct yourself is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness.

So, yeah. So start looking at it as a sign of strength, not weakness. That's a real leadership quality too, bro. Most people can't do that. What you're, what you're talking about, even most high level leaders have a really hard time doing that. So it's just look at it as another skill to develop, dude.

- Awesome. - Yeah. - Yeah, I'll do that. - All right, brother. - Well, yeah, I mean, I really appreciate the help. - Yeah, bro, hey, listen, just flip the perspective on this discipline skill, okay? When you're applying it to business or you're applying it to relationships, it's the same thing. You have to make a conscious decision that is not in line with maybe what you wanna do in the moment, but is in line with the life that you wanna create over time.

And when you start seeing it like that, it makes it easier to let go of this hyper-vigilance and understand that discipline helps us balance out our life.

Okay. All right. Yeah, I'll do that. Thanks. Yeah. All right. One last thing is, uh, is, is Tyler and his salmon shorts going to be coming back for MSCEO? No, no. Tyler's here in the office, but he's not, we're not. Oh really? Yeah. He's he, yeah, he works. Uh, he's works with the creative team. So, but he's not, we're not still wearing those salmon shorts. Right. He is. Yeah. We tell him to take, tell him to fucking stop, but he won't.

That's great. All right. All right, Drew. Appreciate you, bro. I appreciate it, guys. All right. See you, brother. Yeah, y'all take care. Thank you. See you. I love that. One other thing I thought quickly on this, man, it's like, you know, and I had to write it down here, but I think a lot of people have that fear. Well, I guess, let me ask you this. Is it reasonable to have this fear that, like, people think that one day,

is gonna just throw them completely off the fucking track. Yeah, but see, the reason that happens is because they've lived so long being in a powerless state that they are afraid to break the momentum or to allow themselves some freedom. And because they're afraid they're gonna go back to what they were. And back to what they were was so fucking bad, they don't wanna go one inch backwards.

And so there is an adjustment to like understanding that our lives are, we're not just here to execute on achievement. That would be one area of our life. There's many other areas where we need to execute on and discipline gives us that power to do so when we let go of the idea that you're talking about, that it's going to take us backwards. It's an illogical thought because discipline,

The reason you are where you, the reason you were where you were is because you lack the skills that you have now developed. And that is not fully understood. It took you longer than one day to get there too. Yeah. But like, dude, when you don't want to go back to me, like when you don't want to go back, like when you've got your shit together after being in a miserable spot for a long time and you've really made a change inside, like,

the last thing you want to do is ever become that person again. And so it's fear-based, but it's illogical because now you possess the skills to, that would never be you because you're a different you now. You see what I'm saying? And as long as you can recognize that discipline is perishable and it goes up and down and up and down and up and down, and when it goes down, you have enough awareness to sharpen it up. You're not going to go back to being that person. Here's where you will go back to being that person.

When you take a day and you say, oh, it's just a day. Who cares? Oh, it's just a month. Who cares? And you have no fear of like what's actually happening means you haven't addressed the actual problem of developing this one skill set. We see this a lot with 75 hard, bro.

People will half-ass their way through the program and they will do specific parts of it that they feel comfortable not realizing that the entire reason their life sucks is because they're taking every single circumstances and molding it to their own wants and needs and comfort level. And then that creates a situation where nothing can actually develop.

To develop discipline you have to do things that you don't want you have to do things that are difficult and you have to do them at times when they are the last motherfucking thing that you want to actually do and it's not for everybody to live at the highest level either, okay, a lot of people do and when they try to move in the direction of being what we would call a little more normal and

It's they're scared of doing so because they don't want to go back to where they were. Yeah, that's real Yeah, that's real. I mean I relate to that Yeah, you know But you have to you you have to understand I have the skill now to say yes or no to anything that I want to do So it's not like you're gonna go back to being powerless unless you just ignore The signs that you're already aware of that you're losing the disciplined edge. Does that make sense? Absolutely, bro. Absolutely. Um

I fucking love it. That's great. Let's go to our next question. We got to write in here. This is a question about leadership. So guys, Andy, question number two. Hey, Andy, I'm a frontline manager leading a relatively small group of people.

My question is about addressing issues that are unpopular and often avoided by upper level leadership due to the controversial and delicate nature of them. Upper level leadership avoids these issues, which leads to further morale and productivity gaps.

What would be the best way to go about addressing this or handling this to get upper level leadership to address these things? I've made repeated attempts to bring these issues to them, give them strategies to help mitigate and solve the problems. But each time it's met with more obstacles and avoidance. So outside of telling them to come listen to Relay F, what would you suggest I do? Does it say what the issues are? No.

Well, not knowing what the issues are, the only thing I could really critique you on is how to approach them. And if I were you and I had to approach and sell leadership on an actual problem, I mean, look, good leadership should be willing to listen. For whatever reason, I don't know, maybe they don't think what you're talking about is an issue. Is an actual problem. Maybe you haven't convinced them that it's a real problem. Maybe...

the problem that you're bringing them really isn't a real issue. Like, because I'm going to tell you something, dude, when you run an organization, there are a lot of issues that come to you that aren't real issues that people think are real issues. You know, we've, we grew up and I'm not saying this is this guy, but since I don't have him on the phone, I can't tell. But like, dude, I can tell you, you know, especially in the earlier days of business,

Would get hit multiple times a day with shit that just didn't fucking matter Okay, and you know people want to people want to complain and bring issues and make big deals out of little deals and you know You're you could be working in a company where they are fatigued from people complaining about shit That is basic shit like do your fucking job that I pay you for we grow up we have this culture and employment now, which is

going to all get corrected through AI where people are very entitled. People expect maximum pay for minimal performance. And the leverage of the employee has disappeared because of the technology that's available now. And employees for the most part have not figured that out yet. And you know, I just have to put out a warning to everybody who is an employee, not an actual owner of a business. If you're not as valuable as you can fucking be,

You're going to have a hard time keeping a position. So saying all of that, you know, let's say you do have a real issue and let's say it is something that's significant and not some bullshit.

I would sit down, I would come with hard data, I would say here's the problem, this is what it's costing us, this is how bad it could get, and this is what I think we should do to fix it. And I would have it all organized, I would have it back with data, I would have real world examples, and

if they're still not interested in fixing what is their actual real problem, then that's probably a problem with the company that you've chosen to work for and that will manifest itself in the company eventually losing anyway. Because if you have a legit problem, you're not even willing to hear it, that's only going to fester into something that's way more damaging than what it could be right now. So, you know, having the data, having an actual plan to show them,

Convincing them that it's serious are all things that that you know I would do to make that happen and I wouldn't reserve or try to pussyfoot around it either and I'll tell you why because if this is the way that they think about things and there is a real problem then You're doing them a massive favor by bringing it to them. No matter how hard you have to like bring it to them so You know

You just have to fucking do it, dude. Let me ask you this. Is there a way, I guess, like let's say you're upper level leadership, right? Like is there a way, I guess, to like train the people that you're leading on how to look at problems and how to. Yeah, of course. Like how do you do that? You know what I'm saying? Well, you tell them. When they come with a problem. This is how we weeded it out of our shit. Everybody around here knows if you come with a problem, you better come with two solutions to it at least. Maybe three.

And that eliminates a lot of the fucking bitching because if they don't actually have a solution, then, you know. So you make them have it before they even come and bring it to you. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. If you want to be a valuable person, you don't just bring the problem. You bring the problem and the solution.

That's it. Yeah. Like people that point out problems are seen as bitchers and complainers and cancers. People who are point out problems and then come with a real solution are seen as contributors and builders and they are seen as team people. So, yeah, you should absolutely be training your employees to identify problems and come with solutions and not just come with problems that, you know, are.

who knows how legit they could or couldn't be. Yeah. It's a perspective thing. People tend not to bitch when they know they got to solve the problem too. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? I was about to say, I think it's a perspective thing too, because like, you know, like, Oh my God, I'm dealing with this, this massive problem. This is going to fucking ruin everything. Like it's a bad, worst thing, but they don't even understand all the other stuff that your upper level leadership may have to be dealing with. You know what I'm saying? That's a perspective thing. That problem,

Might have been a problem they've had before that they tried to address the way that you're addressing it and it might have been terrible. You know how many people come to me with product ideas that I already fucking made 10 years ago, but they weren't here to fucking know it? Right, right. Hey, we should do this. No, it won't work. Why? Because we already did it. You don't want to do shit now. What do you mean you already did it? We did that in 2012 when you were fucking eight. You know what I'm saying? Right.

People don't fucking you know when you're when your leadership I've been doing this 26 fucking years Yeah, you know many fucking ideas I get from people and I'm like now don't work You know any people send me DMS. You should do this. I'm like yeah Okay, what do you do? I cut grass Okay, man. Well let me come tell you how to cut some fucking grass. You know like I

Look, you can get a lot of good feedback from people who don't really know things that are just green because you get honest, real feedback. But you also get a lot of stupid shit, too. And a lot of times, you know, you don't want to listen. You know, you've already solved these problems or sometimes the problem isn't solvable and it's just called life, you know.

Not everything in a business, contrary to what everybody thinks, no matter how good your fucking company is, there's always things that are going to rub and be friction points. And sometimes the friction points are just fucking what they are. You got to deal with them. Yeah, that's it. You got to deal with them. But I mean, real talk, if this is a real problem,

and you come with a solution and you're unable to convince them to do something about it, there's only two fundamental problems that could be at play here. One, you have ownership doesn't give a fuck, which in that case is a big problem for your future. And I would highly fucking consider moving somewhere that is, 'cause they'll fail because of that. That not listening to real problems, if it is a real problem, will eventually cause the company to fail.

CEOs, operators, C-suite executives, hubris usually kills the company because they think they fucking know everything. So if you're getting that for real and you don't have leadership that's willing to listen and allow people to contribute and come with ideas, that's closed-minded leadership that will eventually fail anyway. Yeah, I mean, flip side of the... Well, hold on. The other side of this is...

That's the first problem. The second problem is you're a terrible fucking sales person and communicator. And if that's the case, that's you to fix it. Yeah.

I was going to say the flip side, other side of that perspective issue too is like, you know, sometimes I guess this comes down to like giving your leadership grace because they're not seeing all the things on the front line. Right. They're not there no more. You know what I'm saying? So it's like. Well, I mean, look, dude, I'm, I am, I fucking listen to, I fucking, I understand that. Good leaders understand that. But also great.

Soldiers understand not to report bullshit because the leaders fucking trying to figure some shit out right, right? So like there's nuance here a lot of him like dude a lot of people like to bring a lot of problems to the their leadership Because they think it makes them look good and that they care. No, it doesn't what makes you what makes you look good is saying hey I identified this problem. Here's how we should fix it and

can i fix it and then go fix it and eventually you'll earn the trust of that leadership to where the conversation will now be hey i found this problem this is what i did should i have done that or not and those people and then the conversation becomes hey i found this problem and i handled it and those people get paid okay and that's it like

I you know and most people are afraid to do that because they're afraid they're going to get in trouble or they're going to get yelled at if you're in if you're in the right kind of company with the right kind of leadership a hungry aggressive wanting to be better company which all of you who are employees should try to plant yourself in one of those places not fucking corporate America where they don't give two fucks about you if you're in a place like that I mean they're

They're looking for that skill in people. It's the biggest skill. It's one of the biggest skills you could have identifying problems fixing problems taking initiative fix the problem and you know People are afraid to do those things because they're afraid to get in trouble But if you're in the right company, no one's gonna punish you for trying to take initiative make the company better calling out the fucking Yeah now now there will be some times like there are some no no fucking fly zones like there's some no fucking fly zones that you don't fuck with and

And you should know what those are, you know, fundamental reasons. Like if your company has a process for doing something, uh,

You better make fucking sure that you understand every fucking detail and nuance of the process for something going on before you change it. Because, for example, there's been situations in the past, in my experience, where there were fundamental ways that we operated and executed certain tasks. People who are

newer to the company meaning they came after that lesson was learned do not understand why we do those things and then have changed those things which fundamentally fucked up the rest of the processes do not do that so if you're going to get to the point you need to you need to understand the why behind every motherfucking thing because sometimes it's not just

profitability sometimes it's consumer value sometimes it's brand sometimes it's you know Wow factor it could be a lot of different things culture yeah is that how we do shit and we do it this way because it represents who the fuck we are and yeah I know it's inefficient yeah I know it costs money that's why the fuck we do it

because the value is in the inefficiencies for consumers people don't want to feel like they're another number they want to feel like they're special and when you do things that take your time and you create value for them that matters and you know a lot of companies lose that when they get bigger because they start cutting things because of the profitability or this is inefficient efficiency for the sake of efficiency is not a winning game plan

Okay, you have to mold efficiency into the value and you make a nuanced decision.

Package out of those two things right like the most efficient companies are not usually the most valuable right? They're not the ones that make people say holy shit and are also Efficient are the ones that fucking really do well Real man. Well, I think we have time. We got time for another call. Yeah, look another call here We got uh, we got Ivan who has a question about Success breakthroughs. So let's let's give Ivan a ring here

There's a weird ring. Hello. Hey Ivan, what's up, dude? This is DJ. Yo, what's going on, DJ? Ivan, what's up, bro? It's Andy. Oh, damn. That feels so surreal. That's crazy. Ivan, what are you doing right now? What are you doing right now? I was actually, dude, I literally didn't go to the bathroom. I was expecting a call. At least he's telling the truth.

He said, actually and literally. You know what the fuck? He's about to tell a lie. He's about to shit yourself, man. No, he's about to lie. He said, I'm actually literally taking a shit. That's all right. Ivan recognized about three quarters of the way through that. He's like, no, I'm just going to tell him the truth. Let it rip. All right, man. Ivan, what's going on, man? What do we got? How can you get better today?

Yeah, for sure, man. So I've been at it, you know, I just turned 30. You know, I've had my own business for the past six years. I started off with a marketing agency and then probably about four years in, I decided to switch businesses and now I'm basically going all in on my second business. And, you know, I feel like I've made progress, but it's been slower than I expected, you know, and I've

I've been listening to Andy for the past, I don't know, six, seven years. I've been using the power list and everything else like that. So I know, you know, it's going to happen, but it's just, it's slower than I obviously expected it to happen. And yeah, I just, I just want to be able to provide a better lifestyle for my family and, you know, my newborn. So yeah,

that's that's that's really it oh okay well bro this is this is called the way it is so this is a real easy thing uh that's the way it is see you later first off dude uh first off congratulations on the newborn that's awesome man and uh we can all certainly appreciate

your desire to provide for your family, which is, you know, not as common as it should be. So let's talk through this, bro. So basically, you know, you've, you built a marketing company, you decided to switch gears and was the gear that you switched in line with your core skillset or did it require you to develop a whole new skillset?

It was in line, yeah. Okay, so that's a good thing. So you already have a core competency that, what is the new thing you're doing? We sell solar. Okay, so you learn marketing, which is required, and now you're going to sell the actual product with the marketing that you've learned. Is that correct? Yep. Okay, so look, bro, here's the deal. How long have you been doing it?

Solar? I've been doing it for about two years now. Okay. But it's just lately I've been like really focusing on growing the business. Okay. And did you have much success with the marketing company? Oh, yeah. That was doing pretty good. But at one point, I don't know. I got tired of doing it. And I was like, I don't see myself doing this down the line, you know, five years in. I just didn't see it. Okay. Well, first of all,

It takes a lot of guts to say, hey, I'm going to move from something that's providing to something that I would rather do. So I think that's a very cool thing. Yeah, for sure. Look, dude, you're moving into something that is a new skill set sales. You have a good complimentary skill set marketing, and it's just going to take time, dude. You know, success is the reality of achievement, brother, is success.

It takes way longer than we think. It's way harder than we think. And that's just the way it is, bro. And so within two and a half years,

it's really not enough time to become super competent at a new skill. So brother, this is where I would talk to you about aggressive patience. And you've talked, you've heard me talk about this many, many times, but this is a simple concept of understanding that I'm going to accept that it takes a certain amount of time, but during that certain amount of time, I'm going to execute on a day by day by day micro basis that

as much as I possibly can. And that's the fastest way to collapse the patience part

to where, you know, you're growing in a way that you want it to grow. So, um, you know, if you, if we were friends, which we are, bro, you know, through the, through the internet here, um, I just tell you, man, just stay on the track, keep executing, look for ways to do what you do better, learn, make mistakes, learn, make mistakes, and eventually it's all going to come together for you and it's going to work. So, um, you know, I think you might just be in this

This life situation might be occurring at a time where you're sort of in the beginning stages of the hockey stick curve, right? Where you're going through the long part of inactivity and it sounds like you're just a little bit frustrated because the life circumstances of your family are not aligning with the success that you want time-wise. And that shit will all come together, bro.

Is that correct? Yeah, no, I feel like, yeah, you know, a hundred percent you're, you're spot on. I feel like it's, it's bound to come. It's just, it's not like I don't believe in myself or I don't believe in my ability to produce. It's just, it's always, um, you know, we always want to faster than, than yes. And what in reality, you know, it takes place to get to that result. Let me, let me tell you, Ivan, that's a fucking very good quality to have.

Okay, when when when you want it now it drives you crazy to be patient and I know that's super frustrating but

However, that is the rules of the game. It still takes time. And most people will get the feeling how you feel right now. And what they'll say is, fuck, I need to do something else. And then what ends up happening by default is they spend their whole life in the in-between phase. And what I mean by that is in between the starting and, you know, the success upswing,

They end up spending their whole life in that nether region of nothing because they can't make it through the distance from start to the upward rise of success. And they see it as a, they see the natural progression of time as

That occurs for everybody as something that they're doing wrong. And then they quit to find something new, bro. And they spend their whole life in the struggle. So, you know, just keep that in mind, dude. It might be frustrating right now. However, if you continue to go, you're going to figure it out. So it sounds like you already know this, dude. You just you just need to be reminded.

Yeah, no, for sure. Absolutely, man. I still can't believe I'm talking to you. You're so crazy. No, dude. We're actually just a figment of your imagination. Yeah, we're AI. It's an AI show. It could be. Yeah, no shit, dude. Real talk. But look, man, do you know some other guys that are very successful in what you do? Oh, yeah. Okay. Are you doing the things that they've done to get where they go?

I mean, I'm following the footsteps for sure, yeah. Well, are you thinking about how to do it better than them? Every day. Okay. Then that's what you do. You wake up every day, you think about how I can do it better, you do it better, and eventually all that compounds into success. And you're going to figure it out, dude. You just got to keep showing up. You got to keep paying attention. You got to keep those nuanced little adjustments to your business plan, understand where your market's going, understand where you can capitalize on it.

and continue to show up dude it's all going to come together man it's just going to be time it's time it's like that it's like that analogy that we use all the time right the bacon the cake right you can't fucking turn the oven i'll say this for everybody who hasn't heard it you know let's just say you want to bake a cake all right and you go to martha stewart and you get the best cake recipe ever and she says here are the exact ingredients here's the bowl that you mix it in

And you do everything she says, okay? And then you pour it in the pan and then you stick it in the oven. And she says, "Hey, cook this cake for 400 degrees for 45 minutes." And because we're fucking smart and we want to make things happen fast, we think, "Well, shit, dude, I'm gonna turn that motherfucker up to 800 and I'll have it in 20 minutes." Except when you pull that shit out in 20 minutes, it doesn't look like the cake that she prescribed to you, okay? It's a crusty, burnt piece of shit.

And this is the example of patience required in business. Okay. You can't get around the time aspect that it takes. It's just not possible. And people think they can, they think they can hack around it or, and by the way, there are things that you can do to make things faster, but there's no way to eliminate this process that is required to produce what it is that you want.

So just keep that in mind, bro. Most people don't have enough patience to let the cake bake and they quit before the cake's done or they turn the fucking temperature up or fuck with the ingredients and they end up with something they didn't want. So listen, bro, it's it's one day, one one step at a time.

You know, one day at a time, execute, learn, execute, learn, execute, learn. And the time's going to pass either way. And eventually, dude, you've already got two and a half years in this. It ain't going to be much longer before you figure this fuck out and it starts paying for what you're trying to do. All right? Yeah, no, that's awesome. I appreciate it. Ivan, listen to me. People just like you.

who come from places worse than where you come from, have crushed shit like this. You got everything it takes, bro. Just go fucking do it. No, I got this. I appreciate it. Thank you so much. All right, brother. We'll talk to you soon. See you, Ivan. All right. Thanks, Andy. DJ. I think that's one of the biggest. You hit on something there. Time's going to pass regardless. Yeah.

Well, listen, dude, when things aren't happening, when you've had prior success and you start something new, you automatically think that's going to be successful very fast. I was good over here. Yes. Right. And that doesn't equate a lot of people. A lot of entrepreneurs ruin their entire fucking lives because they don't understand this concept just because you're good at this thing over here.

doesn't mean that you're gonna start this restaurant and it's gonna be the best restaurant or you're gonna start this other business that's unrelated and you're gonna be good at it. There takes time to learn any business and learn any skillset. So I call this the Midas touch, okay? Entrepreneurs, if they have success, sometimes get what I call the Midas touch. And it's not the Midas touch that you motherfuckers think it is.

Because no one has it, okay?

People think, oh, I did this, so now I can do this. And the reality is that's not how the fuck it works. And I've seen people ruin their fucking lives, believing in themselves so much that they can go from one thing to the next thing to the next thing. It's all going to work. And it never fucking works. Does it work for Elon Musk? Maybe. But aren't all the things that he does sort of related? You see what I'm saying? They go. So my point in all of this is this.

Don't expect things to be great at new things right away, even though you've been successful at other things in the past. Those things do not equate. You are not owed that success. You are starting over just like everybody else, except you have this other skill set that you learned from your previous life that you can apply here. And that will speed it up a little bit. All right.

So you gotta respect the game. That's it, dude You got to respect the game and time is part of the fucking game You can't hack your way around it and it's frustrating as fuck especially to people like Ivan who have already had some success who are starting something new and they're seeing their income go from high to much lower and What happens is you start to you start to doubt yourself? You're like

fuck, do I have it anymore? Like what's wrong? Why isn't, why bro? Because that's the game. Ivan, you're not, and I know he's not saying this, but I'm just using his name as an example.

Ivan, you are not fucking owed success because you had success over there to here. Andy Frisella does not win at everything he does. He wins at the things he knows how to do. You know what I'm saying? And you have to recognize in entrepreneurship, if you get to a point where you want to open other businesses,

which by the way, don't fall into this bullshit trap. Oh, the average millionaire has seven sources of income. Yeah, motherfucker. After they already got their first big win, okay, and they got a company that's winning and they've understood the process of building and creating and becoming what it is they want to become from the bottom up. Now you have a skill set, okay? So I'm going to take that skill set. I'm going to apply it over here to the restaurant business. Totally different fucking thing.

You see what I'm saying? So we have to understand that the game is the fucking game. And if you don't know, you don't know, but it, but you are capable of learning and you are capable of becoming competent and you are capable of winning. You just gotta be willing to pay that price of the time over again. And by the way,

Each time you pay the price it's actually shorter because you're accumulating more skills from each experience. So yeah The average millionaire or seven source. Yeah after they figured out a whole bunch of shit, you know There's nothing worse than a bunch of inexperienced fucking cyber cards Okay, trying to open up seven businesses because they think that like bro, you're gonna fail at all of them. Yeah

You know what I mean? They got seven sources after they became a millionaire. Right. That's exactly correct. Yeah. So, yeah, bro, it's just it's just faulty thinking. It's not reality. I know it makes sense like to hear someone's. Listen, most of the shit these motherfuckers say on the Internet is wrong.

Okay. Most of the shit that most of these people tell these kids on the internet is based in theory, not experience. It's very easy for someone who's actually built things to look at them saying that and say, this is terrible.

Total bullshit, but when you're 20 years old or 25 or 30 and you have very little experience and you have someone Driving around in a fucking nice car living in a nice house Pretending they're traveling all over the world and doing all this shit You're like well fuck I want to do what he's doing and then they listen to these motherfuckers and all these motherfuckers are doing is selling them a load of bullshit and

it's very imagine how easy it is for me to see that i can see it perfectly when you're 20 and you don't have that perspective you cannot see it at all okay so i'm here to tell you that most of the that you see online is okay and i'll tell you another thing all these little sayings that people write and these memes and all this self-help

Who's that written by? Is that written by people who have actually had success or is it written by people who are just writing for content? Most of it is just content creation. It's not actual expertise. It's not actual experience. They're speaking from fucking theory and theory and reality are oftentimes very different things when it comes to operating a business in reality. So

Yeah, man. I love it, man. Guys, Andy, that's a hell of a way to start a Monday, man. Yeah, man. Yeah. I mean, is that it? We done? Yeah. All right. Cool. Well, I mean, I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm here for the people. Yeah. Yeah. Go get it, man. Yeah. Go out and kick some ass. You know, like do real shit. Don't be a bitch. Definitely don't be a hoe. Yeah. Sure, sure. Yeah.

Went from sleeping on the floor, now my jewelry box froze Fuck a bowl, fuck a stove, counted millions in the cold Bad bitch, booted swole, got her on bankroll Can't fold, that's a no, headshot, case closed