Ask Me Anything #7: John Answers Your Questions
The Dr. John Delony Show
Deep Dive
What is the most common relationship advice people get wrong?
The most common mistake is believing that one can change their romantic partner through specific behaviors or actions. While you can influence the environment, ultimately, the other person must decide to change themselves.
Why is it problematic to believe you can change your partner?
Believing you can change your partner creates a false sense of control. Relationships require mutual effort and willingness to grow, and one person cannot force another to change against their will.
When should you delete pictures of your ex-significant other?
There’s no strict rule, but it’s generally advisable to remove public-facing photos, like on social media, soon after a breakup. However, keeping private photos in albums or boxes is acceptable, as they are part of personal history.
How does trauma manifest in the body?
Trauma occurs when a memory of a past event triggers a fight-or-flight response in the present. This can include increased heart rate, sweating, or emotional reactions like crying, as the body tries to protect itself.
What is John Delony's favorite thing to do on a day off?
John enjoys resting, spending time with his family, playing music, attending concerts, and being outdoors, particularly during hunting season. He also experiences seasonal mood shifts, feeling more energetic in spring and reflective in winter.
What is John Delony's favorite Social Distortion song?
John’s favorite Social Distortion songs are 'When the Angels Sing' and 'I Was Wrong,' both from the album 'White Light, White Heat, White Trash.' 'I Was Wrong' became an anthem for him during a pivotal time in his life.
What does healthy masculinity look like according to John Delony?
Healthy masculinity involves knowing when to fight, provide, love, or lay it all down. It’s about having the capability to act but choosing not to unless necessary, allowing for gentleness and strength in balance.
How does John Delony suggest limiting kids' access to social media?
John advises preventing access by not giving kids devices and having open conversations about what they might encounter. Building strong relationships ensures kids feel safe discussing inappropriate content they may see at school or with friends.
What is the story behind John Delony's cardinal tattoo?
The cardinal tattoo is inspired by his grandmother’s porcelain bird collection. Cardinals symbolize visits from lost loved ones, and the tattoo reminds him of his grandmother and grandfather, bringing him peace when he sees them in nature.
What bands would John Delony choose for a hypothetical 'Delonypalooza'?
John would choose the Avett Brothers, Turnstile, and Pantera (from their 1992 era) as headliners for his festival. He also mentions Run DMC and the Beastie Boys as potential acts.
- It's a misconception that one can change their partner's behavior.
- Societal expectations and gender roles play a significant part in relationship dynamics.
- The ability for women to have more options and independence has shifted relationship dynamics.
Shownotes Transcript