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cover of episode I Blame My Parents for My Porn Problem

I Blame My Parents for My Porn Problem

2025/6/20
logo of podcast The Dr. John Delony Show

The Dr. John Delony Show

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Amy
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Andy
REAL AF 播客主持人,专注于讨论和分析时事新闻和政治事件。
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John Delony
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Amy: 我想知道如何处理我对父母的怨恨,因为我在16岁时告诉他们我沉迷于色情,但他们没有采取任何行动,以及我是否应该告诉他们我怨恨他们。我很早就接触了色情内容,这导致我一直沉迷到20多岁,这让我感到羞耻和沮丧,浪费了很多时间。我想知道如何才能放下对父母的责备,因为他们在我16岁时没有采取行动帮助我解决色情成瘾的问题。我16岁时告诉父母我沉迷于色情,他们只是让我停止,没有采取更多行动。几年后,我的姐姐建议我的母亲让我接受咨询,但我的母亲担心泄露隐私,这让我觉得形象比我的健康更重要。我希望我能更早地解决这个问题,因为我感觉我的生活会因此有所不同。色情是让我在一个压抑的家庭中感受到活力的方式,它是我渴望联系和呼吸的解决方案。色情实际上是一个解决方案,对于一个渴望联系、渴望在自己的房子里呼吸的青少年或儿童来说。我对父母感到失望,因为我在16岁时告诉他们我沉迷于色情,但他们没有认真处理,而是掩盖了过去,这影响了我多年。作为第一代美国人,我的父母是尼日利亚人,在我们的文化中,长辈们通常不愿意承认他们对孩子们的错误。我只是想要得到父母的认可,承认他们当年没有做好。我在一个非常挑剔的家庭中长大,这可能是因为我是第一代移民,但更常见的是,许多人在不具备育儿知识的家庭中长大。我仍然需要父母的认可,或者需要他们做出负面回应,这样我才能有理由对他们感到愤怒和憎恨。我一直感到在自己的皮肤里不自在,而色情让我逃避这种感觉。我对自己非常挑剔,总是责怪自己做错的事情。我想找人来责备,但这只会剥夺我充实生活的能力。 John Delony: 你所希望的赦免不会在一次谈话中找到。重要的是向前看,关注你能成为什么样的人,而不是纠结于过去。

Deep Dive

Chapters
A 31-year-old woman discusses her resentment towards her parents for their inaction when she disclosed her porn addiction at 16. The conversation explores the root causes of her resentment and the challenges of seeking validation from her parents.
  • The woman's porn addiction stemmed from a deeper need for connection and life in a critical home environment.
  • Seeking validation from parents who have consistently demonstrated an inability to provide it is unproductive.
  • The journey to self-acceptance and healing requires self-compassion and focusing on future growth, not dwelling on past parental failures.

Shownotes Transcript

On today’s episode, we hear about:

·       A woman wondering how to tell her parents how they hurt her

·       A man hoping to reconnect with his wife after having their first child

·       A woman wanting to connect with her future stepdaughter despite their opposing beliefs

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