White Trash Supremacy
59:54 Share

Craving your next action-packed adventure? Audible delivers thrills of every kind on your command, like Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir, where a lone astronaut must save humanity from extinction, narrated with stunning intensity by Ray Porter. From electrifying suspense and daring quests to spine-tingling horror and Rome

That's audible.com slash wondery U.S.

This episode of I've had it is brought to you by booking.com booking. Yeah. Every time I use booking.com to find a place to stay in the U S I know they'll have exactly what I'm looking for. They have a huge variety of options from hotels to vacation rentals, and I'm

always able to find something that fits my specific needs. I found that Booking.com has something for everyone. Find exactly what you're booking for on Booking.com. Booking.yeah. So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready? One, two, three. Patriots, Gatriots, Thatriots. Fuck off!

Fuck off. I love that. I love that too. And I keep remembering it. So I'm super happy about that. I'll tell you what, you are as sharp as a tack. That's why I'm the HBIC head beaver in charge. No beaver like my beaver. Like this beaver. The hits just keep on coming. Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with is when you have conversations with total strangers and they end their sentences with, right? And I'm like, am I agreeing to this if I say right? Or if I nod my head so it's like...

Hey, didn't, you know, the steak there's really good, right? And I'm like, I don't know. I haven't eaten there. I feel like, and then I feel pressure. Like, am I agreeing to something I don't believe in? I mean, I get in my head and I just think right should not be the end of the sentence unless you have an intimate relationship with somebody. Like you and I, you will talk about the same thing and you'll be like, right? Or I'll be like, right? Like, am I remembering that correctly or something like that? But when total strangers in fucking small talk, which I hate,

Say right. It makes me feel pressure. I don't like it. Just end your sentence without right at the end. So you build to the right. You have to build up a relationship. You have to become a we. You have to be a we before you can be a right. Right. I just don't. A lot of this stuff I get in my head like, am I agreeing to that? What are they talking about? I just don't like it. I think it's ridiculous. You find yourself engaged in a lot of small talk. Ugh.

I hate it too. I think you're a small talk magnet. I am. And feeder. I think you feed it. I think we've made that clear. When I've been out with you in the world, when we're outside of the studio and somebody is preventing the group from leaving, the group being you and me, about 12 times out of 10.

It's the beaver. No, it's 100% me. Like I used to think that I just had like a neon sign above my forehead that said, tell me your life story. But I realized as I age, I am the common denominator. I am the problem. The reason that keeps happening is me. Because what happens is like somebody will tell me something and I'll find something I want to know about in that sentence.

And instead of just leaving it and just saying, who gives a fuck? I go in and I ask. And then that invites all kinds of questions. So pretty soon we're four generations back. I've witnessed this firsthand. I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I know it's good. The three of us were in Denver.

And for the hot shit tour. And before we went to dinner, Pumps was like, let's just order room service. I don't want to talk to people. I don't want to yak with people. I want no part of any of it. Let's just go down to the bar, order, be done, then go back up and we can rest. The waiter comes over and the next thing I know, she's asked the waiter about his in-laws. I'm talking 30 seconds into the conversation. I did. And I'm like, how are you asking this person about their in-laws? Right? Right.

No, I do that. Part of it is, I just think you are charming and I do. I think you're very charming. And then when you, when you, when you're, when somebody is telling you something, you genuinely are interested. And then before you know it, you're in a headlock. Right. And I watched the wheels turning. I see it happening in real time, but I think your original interest in the person is earnest. Yeah.

Even though I already know how it's going to end. And I'm just like, why are we talking? Why are we asking strangers about their relationship with their in-laws? I agree. Like if I were to think of a top 10 things you shouldn't ask people you don't know, top three would probably be about their in-laws. Undoubtedly. I mean, here's the deal.

Once I ask it, it's like the delayed reaction. Like the minute it comes out of my mouth, I'm like, you're fucked. You're like, oh shit. You have fucked this up. You can imagine how I feel. Yeah. Well, I mean, since it's been two years and we're still talking about it. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I mean, I could bring up others, but I don't want to engage in a lot of elder abuse today. I'm feeling charitable today.

And I'm feeling friendship, hashtag friendship. Let me tell you what I've had it with. And this happens to me all the time. And it has to happen to everybody else. So I'm on my phone reading a news article. Like I've clicked and I'm reading it. And then the screen keeps adjusting. I'm halfway into a paragraph and then it jumps. And then I like scroll it back down. I inadvertently hit an ad. And then all of a sudden I'm playing on some casino, let's make a deal spinning wheel. And then I'm like, fuck it.

I'm not going to read this article anymore. I've tried four or five times. The place won't stay. Why do we have screens jumping around when your finger is not on them? We're trying to read. We're trying to be more engaged as citizens. And the only thing that makes sense to me is MAGA is doing this to keep people dumb and to prevent people from reading. I think that's as good a theory as any because I can't remember if I noticed it before or

If it happened before, I wasn't as irritated. It wasn't as irritating because the world wasn't exploding and the global economy wasn't crashing. Welcome to I've Had It. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. Angela D. Beaver. What else? Me, Mommy. Curtains. What about the HBIC? Oh, I'm the HBIC head beaver in charge, head DEI beaver. Oh, yeah. Well, let me just say this. Welcome to America's Top DEI Podcast. Right. I mean, we are DEI.

I have a new story I'd like to share. Many Americans are now choosing their physicians based on politics. And what I have to say to this is this is petty. This is partisan. This is immature. And I'm 100% going to start doing this. 100% I'm doing it. 100% going to start doing this because I'll never forget. I told this story last month on an episode.

about my little toddler needing tubes, the next thing I know, I'm basically at a Billy Graham rally. Right. And it's, we're praying before the tube surgery. And it's not like, dear God, it's like, Jesus, Jesus, just guide my hands and help me get those tubes in the right location as my atheist mother is glaring at me. And, you know, that was a sign, you know, and I just think if these physicians who have a background in

in science are on board with RFK and just Trump's I would say fifth grade vernacular

I'd say that's generous, fifth grade. And they don't think, God, I've been to school and I've studied a really long time and I want experts. I want to have experts in the economy, experts in defense, experts in civil rights. Because doctors are experts. Right. And the fact that they would sign on with an administration that is annihilating intentionally expertise tells me that these experts are not anybody I want to

to have anything to do with my health. Agree. 100% agree. And I'm sitting here thinking about it as you're reading that. All of my doctors are all liberal Democrats, even my vet. So I've done this without even knowing it. And I'll tell you when I really, really, I mean, I've always loved my family doctor, but after the COVID vaccine issues, part of her practice

was if you do not believe in vaccines, you cannot be a part of this practice. Like go find another doctor. We believe in science here. Do you know I went to high school with her? I love her. And most of the people that I went to high school with, when I ever go on Facebook, which is about twice annually, I mean, we're talking QAnon, Trump, Trump.

You guys made it out. We're talking. I mean, it is bizarro land. But there's some of us and the ones that are all kind of enlightened politically, they'll message me.

And Titi, our physician, she was a grade higher than me. So she was a grade older. But the ones that made it out, we're fighting hard. We're fighting a good fight. All right. Next up, we have companies are firing Gen Z graduates months after hiring them, citing unprofessional behavior, showing up late, and laziness.

I can buy this because I think what you have is all these power moms that have done everything for him. Like let's take 45 pictures when you walk into the office. Oh, you didn't want to get the project done on time. Well, that's okay, honey. You know, your, your wellness and your self help is more important. So that can be pushed off when we all know having been in adulthood and

Nobody gives a fuck about your feelings in business. Nobody gives a fuck about how you feel or if you're tired. It's a performance-based situation. Like I've never had a judge say, Angie, do not worry. You don't want to do this trial today. It's fine. You go home, get a massage, fluff up with your phone on TikTok and come back tomorrow. Like that just doesn't happen. So I think this is real world. It doesn't surprise me. It's probably good for them.

Yeah, I think that the hyper helicopter style parenting is to blame here. I think gender reveal parties are to blame. I also I would have to throw in Stanley Cubs and just generally MAGA women that wear top knot headbands, especially bedazzled ones. That to me would be

getting rid of those would help the youth. 100%. Okay. My last news story for today is, this is a fact, the average dog can count to five and understands about 165 words, including signs, signals, and gestures. The smartest dogs understand up to 250 words,

putting them intellectually at par with two and a half year old humans. And I'm just going to tell you all for the permanent record, there's no question that when this fact, when I read this fact, that the smartest dogs understand up to 250 words, that would be none other than Tebby and Cha-Cha. Yeah. Your dogs do understand a lot. They really do. I've, I've fostered an environment with my Frenchies where we have conversations and

We talk each evening. We talk about the things that we like. We talk about, like my dogs in particular, they kind of have delusions of grandeur. They think that they are like expert squirrel hunters. Right. When they see a squirrel, the posturing and the way they jump around and the myopic focus, you think, oh, my God, this dog is...

has attacked many squirrels, killed them, and he's going to go get them. Much to my surprise, we have a 0% catch and kill rate despite the arrogance and the confidence and the posturing, the growling, the intensity when they see a squirrel. They've never, ever, ever approached squirrels.

A new failed attempt at catching a squirrel as though all of the other attempts were failures. Each one as though I am the best squirrel hunter on the planet. And so just last night, I was sitting down talking to my dogs because they were at the front door and they saw some squirrels. And I said, we have to talk about this. You're all talk. No action.

I don't support squirrel homicide, but I'm willing to in the circle of life type situation be like, I think you need to kill a squirrel. But we both know neither of you two titty babies are ever going to deliver. And I'm going to tell you what, they looked a little embarrassed after I talked to them about it. It was a little tough love session because I'm telling you, they're smart. They knew exactly what I was saying. They knew I called their bullshit.

And so I just, I, I, I'm a huge believer in communicating with your animals. Yeah. I, I don't think Ollie understands either. Ollie understands words and it's just flat ass defiant, which is what I lean to. He does. I mean, he understands like, let's go eat. Do you need to go potty? Let me wipe your bottom, all that stuff, leave it down. But I think he's just defiant. Cause last night I was like,

leave it because he was up on my toilet paper ring. It's like, leave it. And normally he will. He just got right in there. And I walk in the bathroom and he looks at me and he does the toilet and he unwraps the whole thing. I was just like, so what did I do? I just wrapped it back up and put it on the back stool instead of teaching him.

When I kept Oliver Glizzard, when you were gallivanting around Europe on your European vacation, which I supported, which is why I volunteered to keep Oliver Glizzard, I'm going to tell you, I think he has some unlocked potential intellectually. We made so much progress from day one to my final day of having him day seven. I think he's dying to learn. And I think you just need to raise the bar a little bit and start having –

really good conversations with him at night. Talk to him about what he likes, what he doesn't like, what he's good at, what he's not good at. And I think he has potential. Okay. Yeah, I probably should because I do baby talk him a lot. I do. You don't want to infantilize him. Well, he's a toddler still. He's just a baby. He is a baby. He's only 14 months. Yeah, he's a toddler. But I think next year you really need to amp it up. I think that he has potential to be one of these intellectual dogs that they're talking about.

Kylie, speaking of intellectual dogs, do you think your dog's smart? She's extremely smart, but she's an asshole on purpose. Is she defiant?

Yeah, kind of. I mean, she'll look right at me and do exactly what I'm asking her not to. Yeah, that's all I... Judy. Judy. What do you have? What's going on on our Top DEI podcast today? Our Top DEI podcast gets a lot of reviews. I love that. And I'm going to read you two today. This one is five stars titled, Five Star Girl on Girl Action.

And they write, the best girl-on-girl action to ever grace your beaver-loving ears. Full of all things Trump's America, meat curtains, beavers, homos, and hounds. There's comfort in the chaos. We salute you. I mean, I just think that's perfect. That is hilarious. That's so good. I just think that's really smart. I think that's perfect. I'm going to read that to my dogs later tonight. No, maybe I should read it to Ollie. Let's do it together. We can FaceTime. Okay.

They do like to FaceTime. We can FaceTime, right? Right. Right. All right, Kylie. Okay, this one's five stars titled Transparency. And she writes, in Trump's America, it's hard to know where to give your money because so few organizations are transparent with how they spend it. Not these ladies. They ask, I give. Live tour, been there. Cult, joined. Book, pre-ordered. And it's so nice knowing exactly where this money will go.

Jessica's portion will go towards a new outfit from Gucci and a trip to Italy. Meemaw's will go towards multiple Instagram ad purchases. Then the rest will be spent paying the toll she was texted about from a state that she's never even driven through. Keep fighting the good fight, caca.

That's really good. That is so spot on. So spot on. Yeah. I'm buying shit off Instagram that's fake. I found out one thing I was going to buy was like AI. And I was just like, okay, I'm done. I'm not buying anything. You were about to purchase AI? I was about to purchase it. And I just thought, how can this old people's skin look so good after this oil? Like it doesn't ring true. And so I Googled it.

like real Google, not on Instagram. And it said, sure enough, it was AI. And you know what I did? I didn't order it. Yeah. I think that AARP catalog is really helping you. It really is. The AARP tips. This episode of I've Had It is brought to you by Booking.com. Booking. Yeah.

Every time I use Booking.com, I find a place to stay in the US. I know they'll have exactly what I'm looking for. They have a huge variety of options from hotels to vacation rentals, and I'm always able to find something that fits my specific needs. I found that Booking.com has something for everyone. Recently, I took my oldest son and his girlfriend to New York City. They wanted to stay in Soho. Through Booking.com, I was able to find the perfect

hotel for us. What I like about Booking.com is I can find a great vacation rental where my kids and I both have our own space and we have a common area to enjoy so we don't get sick of each other. Listener, no matter who you are, Booking.com helps you find the stay that's ridiculously right for you. Find exactly what you're booking for on Booking.com, Booking.yeah.

Ordering furniture can be such a nightmare, but listener, I recently ordered the cutest boucle swivel chair from Article. The entire experience from top to bottom was amazing. The quality is excellent. The price is excellent. The style so chic and the customer service fantastic.

What I loved about the desk and the chair I got from Article is it was mostly assembled when I got it and I didn't have to kill myself trying to put it together. Article, it's fast, affordable shipping and assembly so you get support anytime you need it and they have a 30-day satisfaction guarantee. Listener, Article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more to claim visit.

article.com slash had it and the discount code will be automatically applied at checkout that's article.com slash had it for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more okay Kylie

Okay. So today we're going to do kind of a shotgun method. Okay. I went deep in our DMs. Okay. I actually read a bunch of people's messages and they send some good shit. Okay. Okay. We're going to start with an newspaper ad that someone posted in Iowa City and they posted, you were driving your cyber truck south on North Dubuque Street past the 180 ramps and I was driving north. I didn't see your face and I'm worried you didn't see my middle finger. I

I just wanted to make sure you got the message. You know what? That is a level of hating and being a hater that is just hashtag goals. Yeah. I mean, that's pettiness that I like. I appreciate that. She wasn't content. The dedication and making sure that Cybertruck knows, fuck you, to spend millions.

money to put it in an ad that that is just I love that level of hate I love it it just makes me want to drink haterade and read ads like that all day I mean that's pretty good I don't I wouldn't have the follow-through she had the follow-through she stuck with it I appreciate it I do too okay this next one was sent by quite a few people um this is for Mima Beaver okay

Beavers are petty little shits. In Russia a while back, city planners tore down a beaver dam to make way for some construction. The beavers waited till the middle of the night and then cut down every tree in the area and ripped up all the shrubs. Follow a beaver long enough and it'll hide a literal line of shit in your path to prevent you from getting closer. Beavers, like Canadians, some of the most vindictive sons of bitches you will ever meet.

That's exactly why it's our new mascot. That's exactly why. That's why. Right there. That's exactly why we adopted the beaver. And we have a new battle cry for the beaver that doesn't sound like something a beaver would say. But if you're a listener of this podcast, it makes perfect sense. Right. And we're living in Trump's America. Nothing fucking makes sense.

Oh, my God. I just I just again, I just want to say to Canada, we we hate it. We hate him. We think it's stupid. We think triple Trumpers are stupid. I it's just I cannot believe how dumb people are and what a cult of personality Trumpism is. And just the breathtaking stupidity that somebody would vote for.

For a failed businessman for the third time after he's convicted felon and tried to attempt a coup d'etat and then he tanks the economy. And then they're like, I voted for him because I thought he was going to be really good at business. Fuck you. How could you not know that?

How did you miss that? That's almost willful ignorance. And I just want to tell you, this is a warning. This is a red light warning. And you know when I warn people that I'm really serious pumps. It was like when we were on that flight when those people were trying to small talk me, those drunk people, and I went off on them. I'm going to tell you, I'm really close to completely losing my mind. And it's the next time somebody looks at me, a white person,

and says, I'm fiscally conservative. Yeah. I'm going to blow. I am going to blow.

to blow. I'm going to lose my fucking mind. There is no such thing as fiscal conservatism. Every time the fiscal conservatives get power, they tank the fucking economy. And then we have bailouts added to the deficit and all of these things. And I'm really going to lose my mind. Yeah. And you hear that a lot in Oklahoma. So here's the two things I hope for. Number one, I hope I'm there to witness it. Yeah. And number two, I hope it's someone that I hate.

So that they can just get their ass ring. I would imagine if they said something like that, that it's a foregone conclusion that you would hate them. Right. But I mean, that I've been holding longstanding grudge hate for, for some time. Yeah. Like a hate that you've nurtured. Right. Like we run into somebody at a restaurant that I've hated for years. Yes. And then they come up and say that, and then they just get it. It just comes out of left field ash to, to the ground. That's what I'm hoping for. Yeah. All right. All right.

All right. Kylie, what's next? Okay. The last thing I'm going to show you today from our listeners is an Instagram or a Facebook post from who I assume is a triple Trumper. And someone actually posted this on their wall. Says, this just woke me up. Explicit content warning. If my partner got the COVID vaccine, parentheses, no booster, can it affect me if I swallow during oral? That can't be real. No.

I'm seriously asking, and I can't believe I hadn't thought of it till now. Thanks, mamas. I don't think that's real. Really? I mean, it's Facebook, yes. People are dumber on Facebook. I think it's real. I think it's real, and here's why.

There was this whole thing that people would say that if you got vaccinated, that you would be shedding the vaccine and that shedding could then contaminate a non-vaxxed person. These are the QAnoners. This is where we go one, we go all. This is the triple Trump dump, broke into the Capitol, took a shit.

went to prison. I'm telling you, these anti-vaxxers are bananas and there's a whole subculture pumps, an entire subculture of them.

And they live in an anti-vax internet bubble. And it's all they hear, all they see, all they do. Did people respond to that, Kylie? There were so many comments, Pumps. This is 100% real. Okay, like what were the comments like? Like thinking it's satire or were they serious? No, people were like, you know what? I've had that exact same thought. I have stopped swallowing. And some people were like, you can still get it from vaginal. And so they're pulling out. A lot of people are just trying to find...

non-vaccinated people to mate with. And you know, when Angela Dawn Beaver was at the Yassified version of herself on the dating sites, do you remember how many people you matched with that wouldn't date somebody that was vaccinated? It was like, I'm looking for a unvaxxed MAGA woman that carries her gun, that's got big titties and a nice beaver. I guess. Well, check. Check.

You know, it's so dumb. I mean, that kind of shit is so dumb. The fact that someone would get on the internet and announce how dumb they were. I guess if you're that dumb, though, you don't know you're that dumb, right? Here's the problem. These are armchair researcher and scientists. These are the people that I want to go to the Facebook hospitals because they're

This is so short-sighted and stupid. They're mad at COVID because on Trump's watch, he shut the country down. Right. He did that. He did it. Okay. And it was a global reaction because people were dying. We lost a million Americans to COVID. That's serious. It's a very serious thing.

And so then after he shuts the country down, then I'll never forget it because we're all at home. And I'm on Twitter all the time at this point, like figuring out, you know, just bored to tears on TikTok, Twitter, doing stupid TikTok dances with Josh. I mean, bored. I'm on Twitter and he's tweeting free Minnesota. Yeah. Free Michigan. And I'm like,

What are you talking about? Like, all you have to do is do a huge press conference and say, I'm opening the country back up. You know, if you don't want to go out, you don't have to. And I support it. I mean, there's all this criticism surrounding the way COVID was handled, but this is the way I view it.

It was-- people were dropping dead, you didn't know who was going to die from it, who wasn't, the contagion level of it and people did the best job they could do. I think the aftermath of this, of course, it was dangerous to kids during their schooling, like the COVID generation. But also people are still going on and on, "Oh my God, these kids got so screwed up from COVID."

Well, here's the deal. There was probably some factors prior to this that the COVID just exacerbated. As a parent, you have to teach your kids adulthood and life is unpredictable. And yes, that sucked, but we're going to get you the help that you need because it impacted you more or not. This is all people still being titty babies about COVID. They're not over it because COVID and Trump's abject failure in managing it.

led to him getting his ass beat by Joe Biden in a massive win for the Democrats in a very anti-Trump sentiment. Trump goes on his four-year-long, I really won, titty baby tour and storms the Capitol. And they're all still wound up about all the minutia of all this. Your guys back in office, shut the fuck up about it. I mean, it's just the biggest group of whiners, crazy people.

dumb people that think they're smart, that think they're researchers. Yeah. I just, I, here's the thing. I would just hope if I put something that stupid on the internet, that I would have someone close to me, i.e. you, Kylie, Seth, that would say, take that shit off. You look like a complete confession to make. Right. So this past weekend I was on your Instagram and

And somebody did an Instagram story where they put, because we're one of the fastest growing political channels on YouTube right now for the first quarter. And a woman named Jacqueline, who is a listener subscriber of this DEI podcast, posts on Instagram, I'm so proud of at I've had it podcast at pump pumps pumps at Ms. Welch for their YouTube growth. And

And so you were tagged in it. So you shared it. Okay. Okay. Then she went back and shared your share. And then you went back and you shared her share again. And then she shared your share and you just kept doing it like a little robot. I was in tears crying so hard because I know exactly what you're thinking. Kylie showed me how to share a story. And I'm supposed to share. I tagged in it. I'm clipping.

And I know her. The last time the woman wrote, I can do this all day. I got it when she said that. I was like, but it was like 10 shares deep. And so instead of me calling you to tell you to quit doing this naturally, I got on Instagram and created a chat with some gay triots from our Patreon and talked about you behind your back and how cute and adorable and hilarious it was. I think that's funny. It was hilarious. I was, I was literally crying. Kylie, did you see it? Yes. Yes.

Yeah, I didn't. When she said, I can do this all day, I was like, oh, I've messed this up. I recall you just yesterday saying to Jen and I,

I've gotten really good at Instagram. Well, I did because I was sharing. She thinks she's really good at Instagram. I haven't called Kylie in a panic that somebody's on my Instagram that I don't know and it turns out it's me. All right. What's next, Kylie? Okay. We've got some voice from those today. Oh, yay. Up first, we're going to listen to Jack from Australia. Hey, ladies. Hey.

Jack from Australia. Love the show. This is just a quick one. I thought that you might need this word in your life that my dad taught me, and it is fifths. So you'd say that guy, Donald Trump, for instance, is suffering from fifths. F-I-T-H-S. What fifths is is fucked in the head syndrome. I think a fair few...

I've come across a fair few people that suffer from fifths. And I think that it could be a medical diagnosis that you ladies might be able to dish out pretty confidently to a few people. That's all. Keep it up. Love it. I love it. I think it's great. We love an accent. I love Jack from Australia because of that accent. We love Australia. And I think that's a great addition. Fifths.

And we're qualified to diagnose someone with that. There's no question. We're as sharp as tax. I mean, we are like PhD, DD, MDs, all the Ds. Despite the DEI. Don't let the DEI fool you. We are merit-based sharp. We are. And we can pick it out. That's right. We can pick it out. We can sniff it out. Because we live in Oklahoma. We're surrounded by it. That's right. We can. And you really have to fight for your intelligence in red states. You have to. You have to want it.

You can't just wake up and go to school like a normal person on the East Coast. You've got to want to critically think. You have to try. Yeah, you have to really hone it. You have to buck the system. That's right. Go against what you're taught. That's right. All right, Kylie, who's next? Okay, up next we've got Noah. My one for this week is I've had it with these fucking conservatives who will say things like, well, I was expected to call this person a woman.

Now, that is a man in a dress. I'm a woman of faith. But I also live in reality. Girl, shut the fuck up.

Imagine if we all had the same attitude towards religious people. Girl, since the beginning of time, we all just go along with this bullshit that these people are eating the body of Christ on Sundays and drinking his blood. Girl, I don't go to work and I don't say, absolutely not.

That is not blood. That is grape juice, bitch. I do not say that because who cares what the fuck they want to do? I'm not born again. Bitch, you were born once. You cannot be born twice. It does not happen like that. So why are we all the sudden grounded in reality?

when you believe in all of these mythical things and even if you want to say that it's true and all concede okay it's true whatever for the sake of the argument i can tell you all of this is absolutely true but you know what it cannot be proven by science and it seems objectively phooey

I completely agree with him. And I just I think these rigid conversations and rigid positions surrounding gender are so antiquated and archaic.

And I just think that it's just an extra layer of cruelty right now for people to pile on less than 1% of the population who have all they're doing is fighting to exist. And they've been thrust into the national stage, global stage.

You have that, who's that nut that wrote the Harry Potter books? What's her name? J.K. Rowling. J.K. Rowling. She's a nut. A billionaire. Yes. A brilliant woman. Written all of these books. What is she leaving on this earth?

a Twitter feed of just beating down the most marginalized group on the planet. And then you have people who used to be open-minded big thinkers like Bill Maher admiring her level of myopic focus on hating less than 1% of the population. And I have news for everybody that is quote unquote anti-trans.

And whether you think somebody should be trans or not be trans, none of that will counteract what I'm about to tell you. Trans people have existed since the beginning of our species. They exist in every single country, every single time period. This is not a plot to own MAGA or to hurt conservatives.

It's none of your business. And imagine being the parent of a trans child. And there's this hyper fixation from these rabid nut jobs like JK Rowling. She could go live on a yacht. Right. She could go backpack. She could go maybe give a bunch of money to philanthropy, but she spends all of her days hating somebody else.

who already feels like they hate themselves, who already feels like, wait, I have this. Everybody tells me I'm a boy, but I feel like I'm a girl. And that creates self-hate because we have as a society try to genderize everybody so much. So what we're trying to do as a society is say, hey, we love you. So you should love you.

And what the J.K. Rowlings of the world want to do is make sure that everybody hates them and that person hates themselves. And I think that is just an extra layer of diabolical on top of all this other MAGA fuckery that it really pisses me off. And this is why the Democrats can never, ever, ever cede their support for trans people to

Because here's what happens, fiscal conservatives. They go after trans people. Then they go after Kylie, our lesbian producer. Then they're going after, you know, Jack, your hairdresser. And then they're going after your daughter. Then they're going after your son. And then they start going after everybody who isn't a wealthy white man. And you just don't cede rights. And when we fight for everybody...

That's the best society. No one is free until everyone is free. And that is a hill that I will fucking die on. I completely agree. I have no idea. I mean, like the Elon Musk of the world. Why are you not enjoying your life? Why is there so much hate and anger? I don't get it. Here's what drives me crazy. And I think very well said. It affects you zero. It is none of your fucking business. Stay in your lane.

And now since Trump's crashed the economy, what is Fox News talking about? Trans people. Trans people. There's 10 trans athletes in a body of 510,000.

There are more people with measles than there are trans people. I'll tell you what, Pumps, there are more MAGA sexual predators than there's ever been drag queen or trans predators. It's not even comparable. You got Trump's former faith advisor who is R-A-P-I-N-G 12 year olds. Right. And then all these other MAGA morons that he pardoned after January 6th are out doing a lot of sexual predation on children. It's

Always, always, always these MAGA screamers, pearl clutchers that are always doing this. And I want to remind everybody. This started with everybody being mad at the drag queens. Right. And then they graduated to really trying to pick on trans people. But...

Your child is a million times safer at a drag queen story hour than it is at church. Churches are wrought with pedophiles. Right. Every church. And those are just the facts. I mean, every denomination has a big, huge history. Yeah. Yeah, totally. Okay, Kylie, who's next? Okay, up next we've got Lindsay. Hello, Meemaw, Beaver, and Jen, and Kylie. Hi.

Um, I have had it with couples that have been together for not even less than a year, like less than seven months, six months that are booking professional pictures together, like photo sessions with professional photographers. Um,

What is the point of that? Are you like, are you announcing something? Are you getting engaged after a few months? Like what, what are we, you need to book a professional photographer to truly hard launch. Like what, what is the reason? I don't understand. Nothing is going on in your life that you need to get serious professional shots done, right?

You've just been dating for a short amount of time. Am I the only one that thinks that that is fucking stupid? Like, what is the reason? Please let me know. I love you both. Thank you so much. So I think the person we have to ask here is Kylie. I was going to say, Kylie, what's the reason? I've never done such a thing. So why did you do it? You know, the reason is hard to say. Okay.

I don't think that I have a good one. Mostly, probably just for Instagram. That's what I was going to say. This didn't exist before social media, as far as I know. Oh, it did. It did. People getting... Oh, yes. Really? Yes. There's always been a bunch of psycho grandstanders. It's on turbocharge after...

Instagram and all of that. But I mean, yeah, I remember like back in the day, people saying we're getting couples photos done. People run up to Olin Mills and do that stupid bullshit. What about glamour shots? Oh my gosh. You know, here's the thing. I always wanted a glamour shot, but I never got any.

I think my mom and I did it. I'll have to ask her. I don't know if it was my mom and sister because I was so much younger. Again, a common theme in my life. Yeah, just say that. But...

Yeah, I think that Keppel's photos are stupid. And I'm going to take her grievance a step further. I've had it with people booking professional photographers to take pictures of themselves and their families. We all have iPhones now. The posed pictures to me are less preferable than

less desirable to look at than a candid photo that's taken where it was like, Hey, and everybody kind of looks and you can feel the joy jump off of the image. I just, I have a, an aversion now to like staged photographs. I think they look dumb and I don't like them and I don't enjoy them. And I don't think they're artistic at all.

My thing with photos is because my daughter just had a professional photo shoot for her college graduation, which I'm on record. I told her that's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard of in my entire life. But my thing is when you're having these photos made, who's going to look at this? Who are you making these photos for in the couples? I think that's for Instagram. Like neither one of them wants that photo. Do they? Or maybe they do. But like,

Emily's graduation from college professional photos. Who wants those? Fucking no one. No one. I'm just going to go. Emily, some of my favorite pictures of hers are the ones that I've taken of her on my cell phone when we're in Mexico. And I'm like, hey, Emily. And she turns around. And I like those images better than her stage. And she's a beautiful girl. And I love that she was into all of that. But I like the more candid, natural photographs than I do the staged photographs.

That's just my take. And I'm going to say for Kylie and Anna, I guarantee you I like those photos of you when y'all are all liquored up, taking selfies versus the posed lesbian photo shoot. Wasn't that on Valentine's Day a year ago?

It was, yeah. Valentine's Day 2024. All right, last one. Wait, I've got a quick question for you guys. Yeah. For your generation to my generation. So it used to be a big deal to get your engagement photo for the newspaper, right? Yes. Yeah. Did either of you do that? No. I didn't do engagement. I did wedding. I don't know if I did either. I have to say, I come from a mother who, like her default setting would always be like, who cares? Right.

Nobody cares except, you know, nobody's, everybody's thinking about themselves too much to be worried about what you're doing. So don't worry about it. And the idea that, oh my God, everybody has to do this. So I have to do it has always been lost on me that I have to do what the pack is doing. Right.

Needless to say, I had professional photos made. Those went right in the newspaper after my 500-person wedding, nine bridesmaids, two additional attendants walking down the aisle thinking, this is a fucking disaster. Because as we all know, and I've caught to it before, I was far more interested in the wedding and the bridesmaids and the professional photo that I was going to put in the newspaper than I was in the marriage on me, my bad.

So yes, of course. Yeah. I remember we had a photographer that took pictures at our wedding and because we got married in Santa Fe and it was like 45 people. It was very nice. And she was great. She was French Canadian and she was a great photographer. And I loved the images that she took, but I don't think we took engagement photos. I didn't take engagement photos. Of course I didn't take them with my ex-husband. Of course I didn't give a fuck about him. I took mine, my photo in my bride's dress.

This episode of I've Had It is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Shifting a little money here, a little there, and hoping it all works out? Well, with the Name Your Price tool from Progressive, you can be a better budgeter and potentially lower your insurance bill too.

You tell Progressive what you want to pay for car insurance, and they'll help you find options within your budget. Try it today at Progressive.com. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states.

Pumps, in my opinion, one of the most important drawers to clean out during your annual spring clean is the sock drawer. Because there are so many abandoned socks that just they've lost their mate. They're over in that drawer all by themselves. It's time to just let them go and go to Bombas and get the best, most comfortable, most socially conscious socks a person could ever dream of having.

I not only love their long socks, but their short socks, the absolute best. They don't run down on your ankle. They're comfortable. They don't show. These socks, I'm wearing them right now. I cannot recommend them highly enough. They also have fresh white t-shirts, waterproof slides, and a few pairs of buttery soft underpants.

underwear the best part of shopping at bombas is for every comfy pair you purchase bombas donates another comfy pair to someone facing homelessness listener bombas is going international enjoy worldwide shipping to over 200 countries head over to bombas

When Pounce and I first started the podcast, we were like, God, we'd love to do merch. But as our listener knows, we're barely competent.

middle-aged women, pumps a little bit older than I. And we were able to make our dream of having merch a reality because of Shopify. It's that user-friendly and that easy to use. When you think about having a store online, there are so many different facets. It's overwhelming to think about. Shopify completely minimizes that and lets you be creative and do what you want to do.

And you know, sometimes I ask like, what if people haven't heard about our merch? Shopify helps you find your customers with an easy to run email and social media campaigns. I'm telling you guys, if Pumps and I can have a successful merch line, anybody can do it. Turn those dreams into...

And give them the best shot at success with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash had it. Go to shopify.com slash had it. Shopify.com slash had it. Okay, Kylie, last one. Okay, the last one is from Janine. Hi, Jen. Hi, Miss Beaver. Hi, Kylie. Hi.

I have had it with people going places like the grocery store, even restaurants in like plaid or Looney Tunes or Disney pajama pants. Yes. There is nothing that irks me more. Like you couldn't throw on a pair of jeans or a pair of leggings even like pants.

When I see you in those pajama pants, I immediately think you're dirty. Like nobody smells good in the morning after they've slept and sweat and God knows what. Like, I just think you look dirty. And it didn't really bother me until we were in Trump's America. And those same people who wear pajama pants everywhere they go are probably people who voted for Trump. And that's probably mean. But that's why I listen to this podcast because we're not exactly the nicest of people. Okay.

Okay. Love you. Bye. Here's what I have to say. She's spot on. And this is something that I've noticed. And I have to say that sometimes my oldest son does this and I, this is not a character attribute that I'm proud of listener, but it's something that is, it just is. I am a shallow and materialistic when it comes to clothing. I am, I'm not proud of it, but I'm owning it. And my son will wear the one that goes to Syracuse and,

He will have on his little pajama bottoms and like some little slide mule style slippers and a sweatshirt that is 25 sizes too large for him. And I'm like, hey, do you want to go to lunch? I'll come pick you up. I'm leaving the office right now. Like when he's in town seeing me and I'll pull up and he walks out. And I D I E a thousand deaths. And I just am like,

Don't you think you could have put on something? And he's just like, Mom, nobody cares. You're so shallow. And I mean, and he's right. I am. But I also think there's a fine line to where I don't like the slobification of America. It used to be like, just put on, you don't want to be dolled, but I mean, put on a more of a tailored sweat pant.

and something that fits you a little more. It's just when you go to the airport and especially when you land in like an Oklahoma or places like that, oh my God. I mean, it is just, I don't think there is a fashion police squad large enough that could ever address the attire that people now wear out in public. And it just looks like nobody gives a shit. And one other thing I'm going to say,

I think she's right about it being MAGA. Because I did see at the airport the last time I was there, somebody in like some fleecy

cartoon style pajama bottoms and then like a MAGA coated, you know, like blue live matter with machine gun and grenades and an eagle type t-shirt on with it. And it was wrong on multiple fronts. Number one, the prints didn't match at all. Right. And it was just bad messaging from the top to the bottom from cartoons on an adult to the MAGA coded message. I found all of it incredibly offensive and wholly lacking any sense of creativity or style. Yeah.

Yeah. My son went through a phase where he and his girlfriend would wear matching pajama bottoms out into the wild. And I would just be like, you're wearing that? You look ridiculous. But, you know, one thing she brought up, and I have been banging this drum. I have been telling everyone, when you get on an early morning flight, because we always fly early, people smell like they have weirder smells. So you cannot wear that on a plane because it just, it has...

overnight smell. It's gross. And I just will second, if you ever in an airport and you go through and you follow the lounges like gate one through 20, if you look, you will find the red state, like they're going to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, or they're going to Midland, Texas. You're going to find

that style. You're just going to find it. It's going to jump out at you. It really is. I think that the study could be done. We read a lot of these studies at the top of the episode that like there's just a

There's this surrender to everything bad in their life, including bad fashion choices. Do you know what I mean? Like when people surrender to MAGA, it's just, it's such a surrender. And then you see these people wearing these dorky shirts with words and this MAGA coded messaging, like they're a tough guy and I'm an eagle and Jesus strong, Trump tough. God guns.

Yes. And I just, you know, there was a moment we were traveling a lot during the election. And every time I was on the plane, I would notice the men coming on and that have on these t-shirts that were just a little bit too tight around the gut. Right. And all of these t-shirts that were pretty tight around the gut.

They were all MAGA-coated shit. It was like a camo. And then it had some sort of messaging about how to be a big boy and how to be a tough guy. How to be an alpha male. Yes. And I thought...

This is a lot more widespread than I realize. I remember that flight because they were young. Yes. And we were like, oh my gosh, they're not Fox Newsers. They're like Gen Zers. Yeah. And it was like, it was jarring. I mean, I remember I was in turmoil the whole way. Yeah. Because he's just like, if you have to wear a t-shirt telling everybody that you think you're a big boy. Right. You're not a big boy. No. And Trump would be the candidate for you.

Absolutely. You're a titty baby that likes to sit around and be a victim and whine about how mean everybody's been to you. And Trump, I mean, is the queen of being a whining, whinging little titty baby. But all of this reminds me, you know, this is just this is the party of white trash. White trash. White trash supremacy. They are supreme in being trash. Yeah. Well, and white supremacy to all of the above.

It's a perfect moniker. I know. I know. It's just, it's so daunting for our international listeners, like the heaviness of waking up and being an American right now. It's a lot. And I just, I think people are like, what can we do? And I think we have to like, we have to keep

fighting for our first amendment keep pointing out the fuckery and just hope that we can hold until the midterms and then when the midterms come it better be a blue wave and they need to impeach immediately immediately like the day after they're immediately immediately immediately yeah i mean he's got to go he's got to go if we make it to uh the 20 26 midterms

I ran into some people the other day that were talking about it and they were like, do you think we'll make it to the midterms? And I was like, well, how would we not make it? Meaning undo the election. Right. Like elections are federalized by then and all the votes have to go through Elon Musk. You know what I mean? Just all kinds of fuckery that they could do.

Yeah. That's not good. Kylie, do you think we're going to make it? I fucking hope so. Let me ask you this. Yeah. Let me ask you this. If we make it, will you and Ana do a victory photo shoot? Yeah. A hundred percent. That would be hard. Lesbian victory photo shoot. She likes that. Yeah. I'm just looking for a reason. She's looking for a reason to get tattoos and have photo shoots with her girlfriend. Let me ask you this, Ponce. Let's say that you met this guy. Okay. Okay. We know you don't really like him.

you know, to date or people in general, but you meet this guy and he really razzle dazzles you. Okay. He's got a megawatt personality, a rock hard cock, rich as shit, and just thinks you are the bees knees. Okay. And y'all been dating like two years. And he says, I know this is crazy. And I know you're going to roll your eyes. I've always wanted a tattoo and I just, and I want to go get one and I want you to get it with me.

And he just said, I know you think it's stupid, but it would just mean everything to me. You've changed my life. You're my princess. You're my beaver. You're my beaver. You're my dawning of a beaver. All this stuff. And he asked you to get like a little tiny heart or something near your ankle. Are you a yes or a no? First of all, getting to two years with someone is a huge commitment. That's not what's that. That's that.

I just feel like as I age, people are playing the take-through about how their young skin is going to look so old. I don't think I would. I think you would. You think I would? Maybe on somewhere nobody could see it. I can picture the phone. Like under the armpit or somewhere. I can picture the phone call right now because I've received these type of phone calls from you in the past. I mean, maybe I would and say, fuck it. We're so in love. I'm almost dead anyway. Here's what I think the phone call would be. I think you would call and go...

Don't make fun of me. I know you're going to think I'm stupid and I am stupid and I can't believe I did this. It's the dumbest fucking thing ever. But what was the guy's name? Randy. Randy wanted to get little heart tattoos and he just made this case for it and he was just so sweet about it. And I just thought, you know what? Fuck it. It's tiny. Nobody cares. So I just got the tattoo because it meant a lot to him. Yeah, I can see that. I could probably do that. Yeah, I'd have to be small. I would really support it.

And I would probably hire a photographer to do a photo shoot of it for my Instagram feed.

For my personal Instagram feed. I would be like, hello, I would like to book a photographer. Okay, what kind of photos are these? It's for my best friend and her life partner. It's a tattoo reveal photo shoot. Oh my gosh, yes. Is it going to be pink or blue? Tattoo reveal photo shoot. And then I would roll it out on my Instagram and tag you. And then you would share it. And then I would share it. And we would just keep going on and on. I would just keep sharing it until you said I can do this all day. All fucking day.

um kylie do we have any anything else to report on america's top dei podcast no you just need to plug where people can give us their money and of course all right here's how you can give us your money you can go to patreon and join our cult you can buy our merch you can just subscribe to places and and by supporting us you hear us read commercials for our sponsors support our sponsors

We're trying to get to 1 million subs on YouTube. I think it's going to happen. We've set a goal. Yeah. We are focused on it and we're not going to take no for an answer. The book. Oh, we have a book you can pre-order. It's a manifesto. It really is a manifesto. We are crazy psychos. Psychopaths. We read the audio version of it a couple of weeks ago. Yeah. And then I really confirmed it was a manifesto at that point. Yeah. So anyway, we will see you next Tuesday and Thursday. Bye.

Listen up, patriots, gay-triots, and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20-minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

Please go rate, subscribe and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Caw-caw. A little bit more enthusiasm. Caw-caw. That's it. That's, that's. Caw-caw. That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.