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Had It or Hit It: Jelqing? Scott Seiss, author of The Customer Is Always Wrong, weighs in on this viral phenomenon.NEW TOUR DATES ANNOUNCED! For more I've Had It + tour updates, merch and more at linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast Thank you to our sponsors: The Golden Bachelorette: Be sure to tune in for new episodes of The Golden Bachelorette, Wednesdays at 8pm/7pm central on ABC and stream episodes the following day on Hulu. Lumen: Head to https://lumen.me/HADIT for 15% off your purchase RoBody: Go to https://RO.CO/HADIT. Memberships start at just $99 for your first month. Medication costs are separate. ASPCA Pet Health Insurance: To explore coverage, visit http://ASPCApetinsurance.com/HADIT *This is a Paid Advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company or United States Fire Insurance Company, and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency, Limited. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance. Shopify: Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://shopify.com/hadit, now to grow your business - no matter what stage you’re in. ZocDoc: Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to https://Zocdoc.com/IVEHADIT to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. Follow Us:  I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps

</context> <raw_text>0 Pumps, doing the podcast, our other jobs, being mothers, maintaining friendships. Sometimes I just feel like I have burnout, like I cannot face another meeting, another conversation. And I realize I'm just so disconnected from the world that I need to take the time to schedule a session with my therapist from BetterHelp.com.

After I do it, I feel so much more centered, so much more grounded, and so much more functioning. Listener, if you're thinking about starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapist at any time for no additional charge.

Find your social sweet spot with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash had it today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash had it. Every day, our world gets a little more connected, but a little further apart. But then there are moments that remind us to be more human.

Thank you for calling Amica Insurance. Hey, I was just in an accident. Don't worry, we'll get you taken care of. At Amica, we understand that looking out for each other isn't new or groundbreaking. It's human. Amica. Empathy is our best policy.

Listen up, patriots, gay-triots, and nay-triots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20-minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances.

We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever. You get your podcasts and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind, pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Caw-caw. A little bit more enthusiasm. Caw-caw. That's it. That's, that's. Caw-caw. That's the patriotism that this country needs right there. Ready? One, two, three.

Oh my God, that is so embarrassing. We have to go. We have to keep rolling. This is a show. We're in the show business. You face planted. It was awful. Patriots, Gatriots, Thatriots, I apologize for the limp dick. Clap on.

But she is America's legal eagle, America's greatest legal mind. Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with is cutesy names for kids. We've beat that horse to death. Like cutesy names spelled weird. What I have found in the last two days are two different businesses that have the cutesy names. On my way to work, they're building a storage unit. You know how they're spelling storage? Yeah.

S-T-O-R-I-J. That's stupid. Do you know where I will never store anything ever? S-T-O-R-I-J. It's too cute by half. It's stupid. Place we eat for lunch next door. I guess it's like a physical therapy place. Y-S-I-C-A-L. Stop it. I will never go there. Spell stuff like it's properly spelled because you look like an asshole. I've had it.

I know the S-T-O-R-I-J guys. Okay. Well, tell them from me that is a stupid name. I'll send them when this podcast. Send them the clip. I'll send them this clip. You have to be. You know one of the guys. Well, I'm just going to tell you. I'd say it to his face. Like, I will never store anything there because it's stupid. Storage? Store dipshit is what I call it.

I agree. People take a lot of creative freedom when they're naming babies, when they're naming their businesses, and they get cutesy, and they think they're so neat and innovative and just such great whippersnappers, and it's stupid. It's stupid. I mean, here's the deal. It's a storage unit. Call it a storage unit. Store your stuff here. Not everything's so cutesy. I mean, it's just – it repels me because I just think –

Either somebody doesn't know how to spell or they're trying to be cute. And I almost wish it was a spelling error. Yeah. Because you're not cute. It's not creative. It's just dumb. I have a very similar grievance pertaining to businesses. Okay. I've had it with patriotic businesses and Christian businesses. And if you're a patriotic Christian business, I want nothing to do with you. I think it's so insane where it's like,

You know, like America's Patriot Roofing Company. Shut up. Shut up. Why are you a bigger patriot than anybody else? It's so stupid. Number one, quit whoring out America. Right. That's not very patriotic. No. And number two, when people start putting like Bible verses attached to their business, it's stupid.

I recently was trying to hire like an ACT workshop for my kid to go to, to bring up his ACT score. And I was on this website and at the bottom, they're whipping out Bible verses. You're like, nope. Like, well, how are you going to do this once we get to the evolution part of the quiz? What happens then? Right.

How do you advise my son then? I just, why? Why the overt bragging about these things? If you're religious and it brings you serenity, great. Shut up. Right. Nobody cares. Do your own thing with it. Here's another thing I've had it with. Commercials for churches.

I mean, it's unconscionable how dumb that is. People are just ridiculous. If these churches have enough money to buy television advertisements and billboards, Facebook ads and YouTube ads and all this crap that they do, pay your taxes. Right. If you have all this disposable income to try to grow your church, and we all know the reason why you're trying to grow it.

The reason why you're trying to grow it is not that you're trying to make a better place on the planet. The reason you're trying to grow it is so that you can get more money in tithes. 100%. So you can stockpile it. That's why you're advertising. So, I mean, I've had it with all three of those things. Yeah. Now, I completely agree. It's so funny you said that about the advertising on TV. Yeah.

This is slightly off the subject, but it won't surprise our listeners. I'm getting ready this morning. There's an ad for some erectile dysfunction medication. And I don't know what the ad is for, but I hear them say it also comes with a packet of penal stretching exercises. What? I swear to God. Because I was like, penal stretching exercises? There's physical therapy for the penis now?

Yeah, that was exactly the quote because I heard it and I was like, oh my God, I have to remember this. Penile stretching exercises. Exercises.

Yeah. And I don't, it was some- Like a male kegel? A male kegel, I guess. Is this to extend? That's the thing. I don't know. I definitely know it was an ED because it talked about the long erection and all that, but I don't know what the product was. Well, the listener and I are not even remotely surprised that we're five minutes in and now we're talking about penile extension exercises. Don't you find that somewhat bizarre? No, I don't. And here's why. Okay.

Right now, there are all of these attacks on women through law, through legislation. You got J.D. Vance, who is the most anti-woman candidate I've ever seen in my life. It's all of these crazies, Project 2025, yack, yack, blah, blah. Nobody ever mentions all of the gender-affirming care that all of these quote-unquote alpha men participate in.

by taking erectile dysfunction medication. And I am looking forward to the day that somebody, and I bet it's probably Jasmine Crockett or AOC, just starts mopping the floor with these guys on the house floor. I cannot wait. About gender-affirming care, saying, well, when you have low T and you go get your testosterone shots, is that gender-affirming care?

When you can't get your dick hard and you're secretly ordering erectile dysfunction medication and doing these penis extension exercises because your dick's so small, is that gender-affirming care, you big alpha male, you big tough guy? You big old tough guy. Because that's how they speak about women. They say, well, if she would keep her legs closed and, you know, that you hear these really weird Republicans that say stuff like...

A rape could end up being the best thing that ever happened to a woman. All of these crazy, bizarre quotes. So thank you. I wonder if these erectile dysfunction businesses are overtly patriotic or religious. I think 100% they're overtly religious and patriotic. And you want to know why? Because it's all the alpha males running around to alpha male schools and

They probably need ED medicine more than most. That's my guess. So I'm going to say yes to both. So like this is why we're not in politics. Because if we were, here's what I would want to do. Like they're like, okay, we want to track your periods. I'd be like, I want to track your erections. Right. 100%. I want to track when you ordered erectile dysfunction medication.

I want to know when you were beaten off behind your wife's back, the exact scene in which porn you were watching. And then I want to advertise that on the World Wide Web. I'm looking at you, Ted Cruz. We all know who's out there on 9-11.

A horrible day that we hashtag never forget in American history. He's out there on 9-11 a few years ago liking porn tweets. Ted is. He blames it on some poor intern that probably has no problem sexually. Right. Has no limp dick issues. Right. So, I mean, that's why we're not in politics. Because I would be like, okay, I see that. And now here's what I want to do. I'll race you. Right. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, you just don't see a lot of like boob stretching exercises advertised on TV. But if I started doing it, you know what I'd call it? B-O-B. Wait, B-O-O-B-Zs instead of boobs. Boobs. With a Z. Spell it like a weird business like storage.

Just to be cute. That would be your exercise? That'd be my exercise. I'd do that. You know what you could do? You could put the, instead of putting the Christian fish that's often on businesses, it's just like a, hey, here's the fish so that you know we're in the club. You could do the fish with the feet on it, the Darwinian sign. Have you seen that? I want to put that on our podcast logo. Put it in the show notes this week. Well, I want the Darwinian fish, Kathy. Welcome to I've Had It. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. I'm Angie.

Kathy, top of your to-do list. I want the Darwinian fish attached somehow on our stuff. I'm just going to switch out our whole logo. Okay. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah. What's going on in the World Wide Web? Okay. Today I thought we might rapid fire off a couple of our listener emails with what they've had it with. I like it. Okay. All right. This one is from F Keys and they email us to say, I fucking had it with delis and small eateries that don't finish your sandwich.

Slap nuts, I pay you 100% of the fucking money to make 100% of the sandwich. Don't fucking hand it off to me like I'm in a relay race so I can run over to the gross counter where the condiments are just so I can spend half my lunch hour tearing open packets of mustard, etc. Sorry, you fired the person in charge of the ketchup, but that is not my problem.

It's kind of a great grievance. Yeah. Because when you are in a real hurry, you just have to forego the condiments because opening the bags and all that, it's too taxing. Those little tiny mustard packets...

are way too minimalistic for American culture. I agree. We're used to gobs of things. Right. It's like, here you go. Here's this overt excess all the time, anywhere. You can have air conditioners blasted down to 60. Roads are big. All the stores are gigantic. Footlong hot dogs. Of course.

Of course, we're back there again. No, but I was thinking mustard. Right, right. Everybody knows, especially the listener, exactly what you were thinking, boobs. Anyway, and then all of a sudden you get this miniature little mustard package. I'm like, I'm not conditioned to this. No. You have given me more is more my entire life. Now you're like, I'm sorry. Here's a tiny little dot of mustard. Fuck you, packages. Yeah.

That's terrible. Totally. To expect us to all of a sudden exercise restraint. We're Americans. We are egregiously disgusting and maximalist and all the horrible things. Don't give us a little limp dick mustard package. Especially for Peps's footlong hot dog. All right. This one is from KJV Keegan. And they write, my petty grievance will just one of the evening.

Tonight, I was thrilled to go see the Beetlejuice sequel in theaters. It was a great film, but nothing ruins a good movie high like people who think they must clap and cheer at the end of the film. Firstly, where did this start? Secondly, they cannot hear you, and I wish I couldn't either. I've had it. I've thought this multiple times. However, I've been on both ends of it. That's what I was going to say. I have...

I have been at the end of the movie and people started clapping and I've said, what a bunch of dorks. Right. Look at dorky McDorsen's in here clapping at the end of the movie. The people on the screen don't even know that we're here doing this.

And then I've been at a movie before and the movie was so great. They started clapping and I mean, completely off brand and overcome with joy and totally detached from my cold black heart. I erupted into applause. Yeah. I mean, I've like stood up, like applauded, like thunderously, thunderously, like standing ovation for a movie. I can't remember the movie, but it was in the last two or three years. I've done it up on my feet, clapping, clapping.

But again, I agree with her. I agree 100%. We're the problem. The hypocrisy. I agree. Because people have clapped at a movie I thought was just eh. And I was just like, what a bunch of bozos. Here's the deal. We need to oppose this. We have a brand we have to uphold. No, I agree. We need to stop doing it. And our brand is cynical as all get out and rock hard cocks for you. We just stick to those two things. So even though we have betrayed our oath,

and clapping ridiculously in a movie theater before. We still oppose it and we confess to our listener that we at times are a part of the problem, but we will repent. That's absolutely right. And we'll do better. We'll do our boobs exercises.

Instead of clapping, we'll do boobs. I looked up the penile stretching exercises. It's called jelking. What? How do you spell that? J-E-L-Q-I-N-G. Jelking. So it kind of goes perfect with my point of stupid. Stupid spelling. Stupid spelling. And it is to make it larger and girthier. Well, what do you do when? What do you do?

There was a couple diagrams. You kind of like stretch it out. It's just like slow masturbating is what it seems like. And you do it with your hand? Yeah. There was some squatting stuff too, I believe. They're squatting and jacking off at the same time to extend their penis. You can only do the exercises while it's flaccid. Yes.

sit or lean against a wall or table while doing the exercises. Imagine walking in on a man doing that. That would be the biggest ick. Here's the thing. There's no question in my mind that millions of men globally have Googled, how do I make my dick bigger? And the jelking article comes up

I bet you right now as we're sitting here recording this, there are thousands of jelkers actively jelking as we sit here and record this podcast. I bet there's somebody jelking to this podcast right now. You know what we're going to start doing? We're going to start, instead of calling people limp dicks, we're going to call them a jelker. He needs some jelking over there. I guarantee you this is widely practiced, rarely talked about until we exposed it right here on this podcast. Because if you're keen ear, anytime...

The penis is mentioned. The penis is mentioned. I mean, you just perk up. Yeah. I just get so mad on the erectile dysfunction commercials that I'm just like, I fucking hate them. And then the jelking came up and I was just like, what the fuck is going on there? Let me ask you this. Okay. You ever jelked anybody? No.

Everybody joked anybody off? Let me ask you this. When you hear that penile erectile dysfunction advertisements and you're just angry, I know that the overt reason that you're angry is because they're just bragging about all of this unmitigated access they have to do whatever they want to with their dicks whenever and skirt the system when they have a limp dick, take a pill and get a hard dick.

But I'm wondering if somewhere covertly in there, inside you, inside boobs, if you are a little irritated because maybe you haven't had one. How many days are we up to now, Kylie? I think it's over 9,000. 9,000. 9,000. Do you think that plays any factor in your rage at all? Even an ounce? I would say...

Probably 98% of it is I'm so fucking mad that they want to be in my body, yet they're rolling out ads for limp dick medicine. I agree with all that. I want to talk about the 2%. So it's not conscious, but covertly, I'm sure it is. Wouldn't you say? It'd have to be. I just think if our editors, Kylie and Seth, were to make a mixtape, is that what it's called? Hypercut? I don't think it's a mixtape. It's not a mixtape. That's like a 1980s. Right. We'll burn a CD. Yeah.

What is it? A hyper, what's it called? Yeah. Like a super cut, super cut, a super cut. If you talking about cog on this show,

and our Patreon and all that, it could be a very long super cut. A full episode, 45 minutes at least. Right. Maybe we could roll that out on a day we couldn't record. We just roll out the super cut. Yeah. Yeah. The jelking. I guarantee you this thing, there are thousands of active jelkers right now. Of course there are. Seth just texted me while we were talking about it. Jelking is super viral, RN. I'm in tears. So I guess everybody's doing it.

Everybody's doing it. There's no question. No, of course they're not. Every male with Wi-Fi has searched, how do I make my dick bigger? 100%. It's just no question. Of course they have. I remember as a girl, I know it's crazy to think now, remember Judy Blume book?

Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret. We must. We must. We must. We must increase our best. We must increase our best. Look what happened. I thought it went like this. We must. We must. We must increase our best. The bigger, the better, the tighter, the sweater, the boys are depending on us. I don't remember that second part. I just remember this. We used to do this.

You didn't do the bigger, the better, the tighter, the sweater. I probably did, but I've forgotten. But I'm just like, I wish you wouldn't have done it so much now looking back. And think about that. Think about how like that inherent internalized, like we're here to please men sexually. The bigger, the better, the tighter, the sweater, the boys are depending on us. Just what? Pathetic. And I did it. Fucking I did it up to a D.

Is this when you were wanting to marry Randy? This is when I was fantasizing about Randy, who's probably middle-aged now and jelking. Oh my gosh. All right. This is completely descended into the show, this hit of a podcast of ours, but I'm really excited about our guest. Okay. Maybe we can ask him about jelking. I don't know. I'm going to add it to how did or hid it. Jelking. I'm just getting very dead serious. How did or hid it? Jelking. Jelking.

Had it or hit it, jelking. Okay. All right. Listen, we're serious podcasters. We're very serious people. We're serious podcasters. We just addressed a lot of serious niche topics. That's right. Yeah. You're not going to hear this on other places. Right. It's not the...

front lines of MSNBC. You're not going to hear this on the, like, if somebody is a jelker in a podcast or I doubt they're doing a whole expose on it. No. They're hurrying up to finish their podcast so they can go jelk. They can jelk it. I'd like to see the numbers on how much jelking helps, but that's a different topic. That would be a great little side study for you to report back to our listener. The research on jelking. Research on jelking. Maybe you could be the measurer. Maybe you could conduct your own study. I don't want to have to do the jelking. No. No.

You would get the samples, the control, you know, the people and measure pre-jelk and measure post-jelk. Okay. Maybe you could also count them down as they're jelking. Go in five, six, seven, eight and pull and tug. Make sure you're leaning back against the wall. Clench your ass while you do it. Why does anybody listen to this podcast? I don't know. It's embarrassing. Listener, you're sick. The listeners are sick. They keep coming back.

Okay. All right, listen. We have a guest. He is a comedian and actor and now author, Scott Seiss. We're about to find out if he's a joker. No.

pumps our ability to suck and then wake up the next day and suck more right than the previous day is undefeated it's unparalleled we are the champions if you would like to see how bad we suck please join us in seattle in september or new york city in november for you know just some world-class shit talking that's right live live and in person that's right

Joan Vossos is making history at 61 years old as the world's first golden bachelorette on ABC. On The Golden Bachelor, Joan made the heroic decision to leave the show early, putting family first. Now she is returning to the bachelor mansion for a second chance.

at a second great love of her life. This season, 24 men ranging in age from 59 to 71 will attempt to capture the heart of our leading lady. Joan is setting out to prove that people in their golden years still have a lot of living left to do. Tune in for new episodes of The Golden Bachelorette Wednesdays on ABC and stream episodes the following day on Hulu.

Today's episode is sponsored by the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Pumps, would you pick up a mountain and move it if your dog was sick? No question I would. What's concerning is when you have such expensive vet bills for a pet and how do you pay those?

It can really put a person into a very precarious financial situation. That's why we love the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program because it offers customizable accident and illness plans, making it so much easier for pet parents like Pumps and me to help our pets get the care that they may need.

They allow you to customize your plan, helping to ensure that your pet's plan is every bit as unique as your pet. Vet bills can really add up, especially when you're least expecting it. Listener, to explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com slash had it. That's ASPCAPetInsurance.com slash had it.

Again, that's ASPCApetinsurance.com slash had it. This is a paid advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company or United States Fire Insurance Company and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency Limited. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance. Okay, we would like to welcome a very late...

To the party, comedian, actor, and chronic tardy person, Scott Sy. Scott, I don't know if you know that we've had it with people that run late. So what do you have to say for yourself? This is my worst nightmare come to life. I was so happy. I was so excited for this podcast because I really feel like you two speak to my soul. I'm such a fan. And I was like, this is a priority for me. And I end up so late.

that I've become the I've had it of the episode. This is unbelievable. You know what? I've accepted. I've had it with myself. I've had it with how rude I can truly be. And I apologize. I'm going to make a TikTok about me roasting myself later on. Excellent. Be sure to tag us. I'm going to say, you son of a... I look like if Ted Lasso got concerning health news. I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot. </raw_text>

有过还是打过：Jelqing？《顾客永远是错的》作者 Scott Seiss 对这一病毒现象发表看法。新巡演日期已公布！更多《我受够了》+ 巡演更新、商品等请访问 linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast 感谢我们的赞助商： 《金色单身女郎》：请务必收看《金色单身女郎》的新剧集，每周三晚上8点/7点中部时间在 ABC 播出，次日可在 Hulu 上观看剧集。 Lumen：前往 https://lumen.me/HADIT 享受 15% 的购物折扣 RoBody：访问 https://RO.CO/HADIT。会员资格从首月仅需 $99 起。药物费用另算。 ASPCA 宠物健康保险：要了解保险范围，请访问 http://ASPCApetinsurance.com/HADIT *这是一个付费广告。保险由独立美国保险公司或美国火灾保险公司承保，由 PTZ 保险代理有限公司提供。ASPCA 不是保险公司，也不从事保险业务。 Shopify：在 https://shopify.com/hadit 注册每月一美元的试用期，助您发展业务——无论您处于哪个阶段。 ZocDoc：别再拖延看医生的预约，前往 https://Zocdoc.com/IVEHADIT 找到并立即预约一位顶级医生。 关注我们： 《我受够了》播客：@Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch：@mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan：@pumpspumpspumps

</context> <raw_text>0 不，我真的是你们的粉丝。非常感谢你们让我参加这个播客。我真的很感激。还有 Cease，Cease，我的姓，Cease。哦，Cease。我说错了。Scott Cease。好吧。不，不，你没有说错，你只是做了传统的发音。你说的是 Cease，Scott Cease。好吧，Scott，我们得问你，我们会提前和我们的嘉宾发邮件，你的抱怨清单，我得说，尽管你迟到了，我不会

是五星级的高质量内容，我迫不及待想深入探讨。所以一开始，你对什么感到厌烦？我受够了。我会从小事开始。我受够了那些在游戏节目上赢得奖金的人，家里某个奇怪的人必须大喊，“你知道吗，那一半是税。”是的。

闭嘴。闭嘴。让我享受《Press Your Luck》。让我享受《家庭争夺战》。

我不担心税务问题。对。这是我的童年。我父母总是这样做。我总是想，难道我们不能为他们感到高兴吗？你知道，总有一个臭鼬在花园派对上。你只想看《财富之轮》，猜谜语，却有个臭鼬在花园派对上到处撒尿，提起税务问题。

有些人会让派对变得糟糕。这个兼职护士刚赢了三万美元。是的，试试一万五。

让我们开心。你知道是什么吗？我真的觉得在家里有人对屏幕上的人感到如此嫉妒，他们必须说，“他们赢的没有他们说的那么多。”就像，他们坐在家里看游戏节目赚的钱比你多。我得诚实地告诉你。我确实认为这有点嫉妒。而且，为什么人们总是要贬低别人玩游戏节目时的乐趣？你曾经上过游戏节目吗？

哦，你知道吗？我曾经在《让我们来交易》的观众席上，那个节目是 Wayne Brady 主持的。我打扮成小丑，但我没有被选中参与。但是有一个女人，她必须掷骰子才能赢得一辆新车，他们切换到我特写镜头。你从未见过有人如此投入于陌生人的生活。

让我们来交易。我真的在咬指甲，希望她能赢得那辆车，她赢了。太美了。我爱这个。接下来在你的清单上，你提到的关于被邀请的事情。哦，天哪。我受够了。我受够了在拒绝邀请后被问的后续问题。如果我说不，

我不想听，“那么你在做什么？”“那么你早上的安排是什么？”我说，“哦，我有个约会。”然后他们问，“那要多久？”“那不需要太久。你仍然可以去。”我只喜欢一天做一件事。对。我只喜欢一天做一件事。然后他们说，“那么约会是什么？”我说，“好吧，猜猜看？我编造了这个约会。我只是不想做你问的事情。我不喜欢后续问题。好吧，为什么你不想去？”对。你为什么在乎我不想去的原因？我不能去。

停下。我要告诉你他们为什么在乎。停下。因为我们三个都是热门约会对象。我们三个都是热门票。正是如此。他们都在想，“如果你不去，那就没意思。”对。我曾有人对我说过这些，我想...

如果你在小谈话的情况下依赖我，那你就麻烦了。哦，那是最大的谎言。不，我可以做到，但我讨厌它。我上周在那趟航班上听到你。是的，但那不是小谈话。我们在谈话。那是小谈话，喋喋不休，三万英尺高空。几乎就像空中恐怖主义。声音大得我通过那些降噪耳机都能听到你。好吧，让我们谈谈电梯里发生的所有混乱。哦。

我无法忍受那些不懂电梯礼仪的人。如果我在酒店或我的公寓大楼，我们那里有电梯，啦啦啦。如果我到达大堂，门打开，我却被一群试图涌入电梯的傻瓜挡住了，我正试图出去。让我出去。让我出去。人们试图涌入电梯，就像这是战区最后一架直升机一样。他们试图跳进去。

他们试图潜入。我向你保证，如果你退后一步，站在一旁，会更容易。站在一旁。让我出去。这是我最大的烦恼之一。这在机场电车上也会发生。这是地球上最无礼的事情。我无法忍受。让人们下车。没那么难。不是离开。

当人们这样做时，我真的很疯狂。你知道还有什么奇怪的吗？就是当你在电梯里，只有你和另一个人，而你们有很多楼层要去。我的意思是，我们在谈论一次重大乘坐。你可以感觉到那个人在盯着你。

所以你就开始看手机，然后我总是从手机上抬起头来，我总是想，“哦，他们还在看我。”电梯互动总是让人感到尴尬。是的。你有没有在电梯里遇到过这种情况，当你下楼时，你正下到大堂？显然电梯在第三层停下。那个人在看手机。他们下车了，你知道他们本来是想在大堂下车的。你知道，你知道他们的傻逼。

会转过身来大喊，“等等，等等，等等。”就像，不，婊子，我要关门了。是的。你犯了终极错误。好吧，在走出电梯之前看看楼层。这也是礼仪。也许我们需要开始让这种情况在社交上变得可以接受，当这种情况发生时，只是说，“这不是大堂，傻逼。这不是大堂。进来。回去。”

这不是你的楼层。你知道 Pumps 做了什么？我们最近在芝加哥。我刚在想。我们一直在上下电梯。我们在 DNC。所以从我们的酒店到联合中心，来回走。总是有人在争抢电梯。Pumps 会伸出手臂，刚好停在传感器前，看起来像是在等电梯。她会说，“啊。”然后门就关上了，她会说，“哦，太好了。”

我确实这样做过几次。我的意思是，我只是想，“是的，我想要全额信用。”是的。但我并没有真的在努力。你是在假装跑步，当你过马路时。你知道，你稍微动一下肩膀，假装自己在跑。就像你在更快地移动。对。但你只是尽可能慢地走。是的。

穿过人行道。你们有没有被困在电梯里？我在大学时被困过。多长时间？多长时间？我的室友们在跳跃，就像我们被困住了，然后消防部门不得不来，真的打开电梯的顶部，把我们一个个拉出来。哦，我的天。我们大概在里面待了一个小时。所以我们被困住了。我们知道，电梯停止了移动。

我当时想，“哦，天哪，这太尴尬了。”你知道，有些人，有些我的朋友在笑。然后我的一个朋友站起来说，“大家，停下，停下，停下。空气供应有限。”而电梯里有一个通风口。就像我们不会在这个电梯里窒息。好吧。好吧。你有你的清单在我们面前吗？我们的通讯员？哦，我的清单。我这里有我的整个清单。好吧。读一下关于 yucking yum 的那一条。好的，来吧。

我受够了那些说“不要贬低别人的乐趣”的人。让我做个讨厌者。让我讨厌。贬低是我的乐趣。贬低是我的乐趣。所以根据你自己的逻辑，你犯了终极罪过，你贬低了我。

完全正确。不要这样做。如果我想在我自己家里的私密空间里说，“你知道，我不理解那些在公共场合穿狐狸尾巴的人。”如果我想在我自己家里的私密空间里说这些，我并不是在国会山游行说这应该是非法的。我只是在我家里，或者我在一个受欢迎的播客上说这些。这是我唯一会这样做的地方。

就这样。我同意你。贬低别人的乐趣是有趣的。对。人们，我的意思是，如果这无害。你知道，我不喜欢这种来自于说坏话的反弹。我们需要坚定地贬低乐趣和说坏话。我们必须这样做，因为有毒的积极性运动已经失控，他们来找我们，并且取得了很大的进展。他们在地面上有很多人。他们有很多 Instagram 账户。他们有很多俄罗斯水军。是的。

我感受到这个运动的进展。我认为我们必须不断贬低别人的乐趣。尽可能多地。是的。我上周在一家餐厅，有人把他们的胡须龙带进了餐厅。

他们的胡须龙，一只蜥蜴，坐在他们的肩膀上，喝酒，吃翅膀，坐在外面。我想，我们需要恢复羞耻感。

你必须为你正在做的事情感到羞耻。你必须被贬低。对不起。是的。我完全同意羞耻感。某种程度的羞耻感对于在生活中取得成功是必要的，因为有些事情，我自己也包括在内，有些我的想法和事情是愚蠢的。如果没有人告诉你它们愚蠢，你怎么能知道？

是的。我的意思是。好吧，愚蠢的人往往缺乏洞察力。对。所以你必须提醒他们他们是愚蠢的。我认为这是愚蠢的一个固有特征，就是缺乏洞察力。所以这是我们的工作。绝对是。提醒他们，“嘿，傻逼，你是个愚蠢的傻瓜。”是的，我在贬低你的乐趣。但是等等，你不被允许闭嘴。是的。闭嘴。

好吧。这是我真的很有罪的一件事，但我和你一样想要尽可能多地贬低它。你提到那些在体育场比赛和音乐会结束前离开的人，而我对此是个大罪犯。你现在可以批评我。我准备好了。我就是不理解。你知道，节省时间的最佳方法是什么？

根本不去体育场。赞同。我同意你的看法。你看，我觉得你已经投入了。那是沉没成本。你在那里。你知道，你会在那里。就像，呆在整个体验中。或者如果我在一个团体中，

我不想感到压力，如果其他人都说，“好吧，我们现在不如走。”而我想，“我为此付了钱。我想再吃一个热狗，我想看完棒球比赛的最后时刻。也许会发生一些惊人的事情，我们只需在停车场多等十分钟。”我看着我的朋友们，或者那些喜欢这样做的人，如果他们说，“哦，安可即将开始。我们走吧，音乐会或其他的。”我想，“有什么事情这么重要，你必须去？你没有其他事情。”

你没有其他事情发生。再坐下十五分钟，让我们从这个体验中获得价值。让我们获得价值。让我们一起创造回忆。

你想离开，所以我们在下电梯的时候只听到正在发生的事情。我的天。然后你最后感到的就是你利用了系统。哦，看那。我们确实避开了人潮。事情是这样的。你完全正确。我们在这方面是 1000% 错的。你已经做出了承诺。你买了票。你拖着行李进来了。你和所有这些人一起。这是一个巨大的持续的集体活动。毫无疑问。

为什么要提前离开？我告诉你，我真的就是那种呆板的人，我想，

是的，让我们在大家之前离开——这样我们可以抢先一步。我觉得我利用了系统。我觉得我走的时候脚步轻快。但你 100% 正确。现在，如果是像——我记得我们——如果我在网球比赛上，我想看颁奖典礼，我会一直呆到最后，因为我非常喜欢那个。但像 NBA 比赛，他们——我的意思是，他们一年打大约 100 场比赛。这是疯狂的。我只是觉得你在说，提前离开感觉像是胜利。是的。

而那些这样做的人，他们会说，“哦，我的天，我是个天才。我逃离了我付钱的事情。”我说，“你在说什么？”而这对你来说感觉像是失败。听起来对我来说是失败。就像我点了一份牛排作为晚餐，我却把它扔进了垃圾桶。是的，我提前离开了晚餐。我甚至没有吃它。我就这样离开了。Pumps，你知道，我们很多听众都听说过 Ozempic 或 WeGoVee。他们可能听说过这几种选择的三件事。

这些选择有效，但它们非常昂贵，而且很难获得。让我告诉你，我通过 Rho 获得了我的，它改变了一切。它更便宜，更快，而且在我需要的时候总是可用。听众，通过 Rho，你可以以品牌 GLP-1 的相同减肥成分，访问处方复合 GLP-1，

费用仅为一小部分。Roe 目前有复合 GLP-1 的库存，如果你符合条件，可以在一到四天内获得。你可以在自己家里舒适地查看是否符合条件。这意味着无需安排医生预约，无需通勤到医生办公室，也无需等待。开处方后，你的药物将在一到四天内直接寄给你。

听众，前往 roe.co slash had it。会员资格从首月仅需 $99 起。药物费用另算。那是 roe.co slash had it。前往 roe.co slash safety 以获取黑框警告和完整的安全信息。复合药物不需要并且不接受 FDA 审查或批准，仅限处方。

你知道，Pumps，很多人都有商业想法，你只是有那个想法，但商业背后的实质是什么，商业背后的商业，如果你愿意的话？正如你所知，我们的听众也知道，我们使用 Shopify。Shopify 使得如何将产品

送到买家手中变得更加简单，并帮助你获得买家。

在 shopify.com slash had it 注册每月一美元的试用期。前往 shopify.com slash had it，今天升级你的销售。再次强调，前往 shopify.com slash had it。

你知道，Pumps，在前几集里，你跟听众谈到你是如何被吸引去购买这些愚蠢的狗玩具在 Instagram 上，然后它们到货时完全是垃圾。我每次都是个傻瓜。你知道，你可以在狗玩具的选择上冒一点小风险，但当涉及到你的健康时，你不能冒任何风险。你必须找到适合你的专业人士，以便为你想要寻求建议的具体事情提供帮助。这就是为什么你和我都是

大信奉者和大用户 ZocDoc。我特别喜欢 ZocDoc，因为我可以获得患者评论

而且他们可以在我甚至打电话之前告诉我他们接受我的保险。听众，ZocDoc 是一个免费的应用程序和网站，你可以搜索和比较高质量的网络内医生，选择适合你需求的医生，并点击立即预约。我们在谈论与超过 100,000 名医疗提供者跨越每个专业的网络内预约。此外，ZocDoc 预约进行得很快，通常在预约后的 24 到 72 小时内。

所以听众，别再拖延那些医生的预约，前往 ZocDoc.com slash I've had it，今天找到并立即预约一位顶级医生。那是 Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash I've had it。ZocDoc.com slash I've had it。好吧，所以接下来我们要做的就是玩一个叫做 Had It or Hit It 的游戏。哦，我的天。欢迎来到 Had It or Hit It。我会打它。受够了。

我每天都打，有时一天打两次。好吧。Had it or hit it，群聊或群发短信。受够了。让我离开。我正在从群聊中拉出逃生舱。我累了。我不想每五秒钟对我没有阅读的消息做出“哈哈”反应和“爱”反应。我想被放出来。我完全同意。最糟糕的部分是当你在一个充满音频消息的群聊中时。是的。

我拒绝听音频消息。我坚决拒绝。音频消息。我得听你一天的播客。我已经有了我想听的播客。天哪。我受够了，你知道，在播放列表中。我不想听关于你的播客，这需要你 45 分钟才能说到重点。是的。我刚从咖啡店出来。是的。我刚没有，不，不，不，不。我现在正去上班。快点。给我，给我信息。你需要什么？

你需要什么？写下来。发送音频消息的人，就是那些想要进行对话，但他们只想听自己说话的人。我想参与。你知道谁发送音频消息吗？假忙的人。所有这些事情都是同一个人。发送音频消息的人也是假忙的人。我对此深信不疑。

就像我确定斯坦利杯会导致特朗普主义。是的。我知道。我进行了自己的研究。我们的听众给我发送了各种证据，最初是轶事性的，现在我们有了一些证据。关于斯坦利杯？导致特朗普主义。特别是特朗普集会。我相信。我也是。我在某人拿着斯坦利杯时会感到害怕。我想，哦，糟糕。这太可怕了。我不会问太多问题。是的。

好吧。Had it or hit it，早起的人。受够了。受够了。你听着，我的人，这对喜剧演员来说很难。我会熬夜。我会熬夜到三点、四点。你知道，我不会在那时上床睡觉。我早上 11 点起床。

我告诉早起的人，他们会说，“哇，你睡得真晚，是不是？”我和你睡的时间是一样的。我早睡。你晚上 7 点就睡觉。人们表现得好像如果你早上 11 点起床就不成熟。就像，我不是个农民。我有不同的工作。

我不是个鸟类观察者。让我，我必须像其他人一样睡八个小时。我开始得晚。人们，反向从未被提及，就像，“哦，我晚上 7 点就睡觉。”那么你懒惰。你在做什么？哦。

从七点到十点。我不知道你在做什么。好吧。所以在这里，我同意你，但我早睡早起。我的意思是，今天早上我四点半起床，做了 Wordle 连接，给每个人发了我的结果。并且真的感觉到，我知道当他们看到那个时间戳时，这只是给 Jennifer 的额外加分。我知道，我感觉，如果我早上给你发我的 Wordle，

那就是你的就寝时间。对。那正是。我也做 Wordle 和连接，但我在上午 11 点做。是的。对。这是迟到一天，少了一美元的事情。我看到一个趋势。上午 11 点的起床时间。是的。迟到 45 分钟参加播客。这完全说得通。做 Wordle 在上午 11 点。所有的一切都流畅。就像晚、晚、晚、晚、晚。

是的。我是个尴尬的人。我告诉你，我是个尴尬的人。好吧。Had it or hit it，家庭合院。受够了。我不喜欢——我父母会不断提出这个想法。我们应该都去——住在一个家庭合院里？如果我要这样做，我会加入一个邪教。我不想——

如果我要被围绕在一个合院里，我想和同龄人一起做。好吧。我不需要……我觉得这可能是像 Gen X 这样的梦想，人们希望他们的整个家庭一起生活和耕作，远离社会。我理解这种冲动，但...

我只想和我的妻子住在一起，远离一切，过得好。我不在《人人都爱雷蒙德》中。我不想住在合院的街对面。你们都经历过这个吗？我是个 Gen Xer，我不想住在家庭合院里。我不，我有点反对这个。

哦，好吧。你反对这个。我反对家庭合院。听起来这可能会导致达根家族，就像斯坦利杯导致特朗普主义一样。家庭合院可能会导致达根家族。接下来你知道的，你正在抱着一条响尾蛇，讲着方言。我认为这是一个非常滑的坡。是的。你与社会切断联系。突然间，你在 DNC 上被人嘲讽。没错。你在吃迷幻蘑菇，变得疯狂。我认为这是一件非常棘手的事情。

我知道有两个人和他们的家人住在合院里，他们称之为合院。什么？就像有五栋房子的土地，所有兄弟姐妹和父母。我只是觉得那里发生了一些奇怪的事情。那里有些奇怪的事情。记得《大爱》吗？哦，我的天。我爱《大爱》。是的。是的。爱它。这就是发生的事情。我只是——这总是让我想—

还有谁会喜欢他们的家人，愿意在成年生活中和他们住在一起？没有人。没有人。没有人。没有人。我们接受他们，知道这是可以的。这很好。这很好。第二个人住在合院里，就像，好吧，衣橱里有多少件长袍？那里有一些长袍。是的。地下室里正在建造一艘宇宙飞船，或者其他什么。发生了什么鬼事？有些奇怪的事情。好吧。Had it or hid it，企业语言。哦，受够了。受够了。受够了。

我无法。我无法。你提到这个——我在我的书《顾客永远是错的》中有整整一章，您好。您好。您好。我受够了。我无法忍受。我曾经有一份办公室工作，在我做客户服务之后，但每当有人进来——我有个硬性截止时间。我在三点有个硬性截止时间。从什么时候开始我们可以这样说？我在三点有个硬性截止时间。

每天早上 9:30。我只能工作 30 分钟。我不知道这里有秘密代码可以让你他妈的离开。哦，我的天。哦，我们在这里是一个大家庭。什么？这是什么？《速度与激情》，每小时 10 美元？你在说什么？我无法忍受企业语言。我无法忍受。受够了还是打过，jelking。jelking？

我们刚在预演中发现了它是什么。我们之前完全不知道它是什么。我一直在等——等一下，你知道，我之前听说过这个。我将做一件危险的事情。我现在要谷歌一下。哦，是的，是的，我听说过这个。是的，是的。我现在实际上在 jelking 的 TikTok 侧。这很不幸。这是我过去几个月的算法。你知道吗？我会打它。我会打它。老实说，我还没有看到足够的内容。我想自己试试这个。

<context>Yuck Is My Yum Had It or Hit It: Jelqing? Scott Seiss, author of The Customer Is Always Wrong, weighs in on this viral phenomenon.NEW TOUR DATES ANNOUNCED! For more I've Had It + tour updates, merch and more at linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast Thank you to our sponsors: The Golden Bachelorette: Be sure to tune in for new episodes of The Golden Bachelorette, Wednesdays at 8pm/7pm central on ABC and stream episodes the following day on Hulu. Lumen: Head to https://lumen.me/HADIT for 15% off your purchase RoBody: Go to https://RO.CO/HADIT. Memberships start at just $99 for your first month. Medication costs are separate. ASPCA Pet Health Insurance: To explore coverage, visit http://ASPCApetinsurance.com/HADIT *This is a Paid Advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company or United States Fire Insurance Company, and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency, Limited. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance. Shopify: Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://shopify.com/hadit, now to grow your business - no matter what stage you’re in. ZocDoc: Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to https://Zocdoc.com/IVEHADIT to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. Follow Us:&nbsp; I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps

</context> <raw_text>0 我想谈谈一个jelking的事情。对，jelking。在这个地方有很多jelking。所以我们做了。我们谈论了jelking。在你来之前，我说，我要把jelking放进他的“有过还是没过”中。所以这已经准备好了。这是个大话题。我们为你准备好了。你不应该迟到。我们有时间。你正好走进来了。我们有这么多时间。是的。

时间太多了。太多时间是件坏事。尤其是对我们来说。是的。好的，最后一个，Scott。有过还是没过，Kamala Harris。哦，没过。哦，我的天。你在开玩笑吗？是的。她太棒了。是的。当她终于被确认将成为提名人时，我感到充满了能量。我只是觉得...

你知道，我非常进步。我认为自己是个左派。不，我真的很喜欢她。我喜欢她在辩论中看着特朗普，这个老家伙，像个傻瓜。我就是喜欢那样。你看到辩论中她差点叫他“混蛋”吗？你可以听到她说。她没有说，但她看着他。她说这个。然后她摇了摇头。前总统。就像。

我们都知道。每个人都说“混蛋”。我们都说“混蛋”。混蛋。我就是喜欢我们需要这个。是的。这太令人兴奋了。我们是Kamala的超级支持者。我们住在一个红州。所以我们看到疯狂的人。

我的意思是，失控的疯狂家庭聚会。与这些政客在这里所做的相比，jelking看起来就像小孩子的游戏。好吧，我无法感谢你足够。你值得等待。绝对值得等待。你绝对值得等待。你太搞笑了。这真是太有趣了。祝你在jelking练习中好运。是的。

为我们宣传一下你的书。我现在在谷歌图片上找到了。我学会了正确的技巧。对。我会尝试这个。不，我无法感谢你让我上节目。我是这个节目的超级粉丝。我很高兴这值得等待。但请随意永远嘲笑我。好的。所以你目前的书是《顾客总是错》。

是的。这是我写的第一本书。《顾客总是错》。它扩展了你知道的这些客户服务视频，我制作这些视频，谈论人们在工作中必须处理的最烦人和压力大的事情。比如人们说：“我在这里当顾客已经超过40年了。”哦，太好了。那么你很快就会死去。像这样的事情。

所以如果你喜欢我的视频，你会喜欢这本书。这是送给任何在工作中度过糟糕一天并喜欢谈论这些事情的人的绝佳礼物。我喜欢它。喜欢谈论这些事情。喜欢“yuck yum”。好的。我们会在我们的节目笔记中链接它。非常感谢你，Scott。谢谢，Scott。再见。非常感谢。祝你有个好日子。再见，大家。我真的很喜欢Scott。我喜欢...

他能自嘲。我喜欢他要开始jelking。我爱这个。我真的很想。你知道吗？我觉得我们应该请他再来一次，这样他就可以和我们谈谈他的jelking之旅。我们应该做一期关于他的jelking的后续节目。还有另一个书名的想法是...《我的Jelking之旅》。我的Jelking之旅。Scott Cisse的《我的Jelking之旅》。是的。

直播。我是说，我看到无限的潜力。嗯。我也是。我喜欢你这样做。

我们是可怕的人。我认为没有问题。他真可爱。可爱。嗯。好的。那么，听众，我们的Patreon后续节目现在开始。喜欢，订阅。请点击个人资料中的链接。此外，我们在个人资料中有一个新链接，你可以确认你已注册投票。去“我已经受够了”播客的任何社交媒体，我们将在周二和周四见到你。再见。

那太糟糕了。哇。哇。我说话结结巴巴。哇。哇。她已经在jelking了。我在心里jelking。我们周二和周四见。

有时候我感觉自己有点疲惫，无法面对另一个会议，另一个对话。我意识到我与世界脱节，我需要花时间安排一次与BetterHelp.com的治疗师的会面。

在我做完之后，我感觉更加集中，更加扎实，更加有功能。听众，如果你在考虑开始治疗，试试BetterHelp。它完全在线，旨在方便、灵活，并适合你的日程。你只需填写一份简短的问卷，就可以与一位持证治疗师匹配，并且你可以随时更换治疗师而无需额外收费。

通过BetterHelp找到你的社交甜蜜点。今天访问betterhelp.com slash had it，获得你的第一个月10%的折扣。那就是betterhelp，H-E-L-P dot com slash had it。当你需要用餐灵感时，值得在Fries购物，寻找成千上万的美味食材，激发无数令人垂涎的美食。无论你选择什么美味，你都将享受我们每天的低价。

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