Financial Audit: 90-Day Fiancé
01:24:12 Share

- To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. You know 90 Day Fiance? - Yeah, I mean, I know 90 Day Fiance. - What's different here? - I mean, there's nothing really different about it. - So just fully mail-ordered bride. - Well, I guess I did pay a dowry. I met a girl from Brazil, I met a girl from Turkey. - Oh . Yeah, I think they wanna come here. - That's kind of what my message said. - Oh, what did it say? - Would you like to come move to America with me? It's getting lonely in my apartment with my cat. - Oh no!

Download my budgeting app today and take control of your money once and for all. And for a limited time only, sign up for the annual version of premium and get my cookbook and notebook signed and mailed directly to you. Link in the description and pin comment below. Hi, this is Jedediah. I'm 36. I'm from near Colorado Springs, Colorado. And this is Financial Audit. Thanks for coming over to Austin, man. Glad to be here. Glad to be here. I don't think you're allowed to wear that.

Oh, I for sure am. I mean, I can't believe you'd even say anything like that, you know. Is this a cultural appropriation comment? I don't know. I just feel like the internet is telling me that the internet would be mad. The internet's already telling you? Yeah. Oh, well, no. Well, what are we doing? So I bought it. They told me to buy it. Oh, they told me to buy it. And yeah, so I think it's okay. I mean, I was requested to buy it for an engagement ceremony. So...

You're buying it for your engagement ceremony? Yeah. But you're wearing it out in public. Well, yeah, because I thought it would be funny. You hear that, whatever culture this is? No, no. I'm kidding. I don't give a fuck. Trust me. I'm not someone that would get offended. I was pretty sure you were going to lead with a cultural appropriation comment. I wouldn't care. I called it. This is the internet. The internet. I don't give a fuck what anyone does. But, okay. So...

You're engaged. Or you're getting engaged? Yeah, just got engaged. Is that the culture of the person you're getting engaged to? Yeah, and then the colors are their native town and tribe. So each area in the country has different colors. What is it? What country...

Well, the country is Cameroon and the region is Bermuda. Is that like her roots or is she like there right now? Yeah, well, both. Yeah, she's in Cameroon still, but she's in the big city and she's from Bermuda. Two weeks in a row of like a 90-day fiance, African version. Yeah, I guess talk to Lindsay. Yeah, this is interesting. This is a double dipper. What are we doing? I mean, okay.

What did you even find her on? OkCupid. Were you in Africa on the maps? No, no. Okay, so they had a passport mode. And so, okay, OkCupid's a less popular one. Right now, Hinge is the big thing. Then Tinder and Bumble have been around for a while. Right, so...

So I wasn't like – I had kind of gone through those already. I was just like, what's going on in OkCupid? I haven't heard about that in a while. Sure. And so instantly I did a few swipes and instantly I was suddenly in Denver. So I was out of the locals. So let's jump to Cameroon. Well, they have passport mode. Right. But there's states surrounding Colorado, but sure. Yeah, okay. So then I did passport mode and –

So, yeah, I was just messaging girls from like kind of everywhere. Not just Cameroon. Did you like drop your little passport mode in the middle of Africa? Just like. No, you know, I don't think their passport mode work like that from what I remember. I mean, I could be totally wrong. I think it was just showing me girls from all sorts of different places. Has she always lived there? Yeah, she's always lived there.

So, like, I met a girl from Brazil. I met a girl from Turkey. I met a girl from Nigeria. So you knew you would be on TLC, right? Well, no. What's different here? What do you mean? Why would I be on TLC? What's different here than the traditional 90-day fiancé story? Do you know 90-day fiancé? Yeah, I mean, I know 90-day fiancé. What's different here? What do you mean, what's different about it? What's different about your situation than...

90 Day Fiance. I mean, there's nothing really different about it. So just fully mail-ordered bride. Well, it's not... I didn't... Well, I guess I did pay a dowry, but yeah. We talked about that one too. But yeah. No, so okay. It's like there's a... Just like a white dude like pays the...

the family tribe some money and then they get to marry their daughter, bring them over. Kind of. Yeah. I mean, that's kind of how the dowry works. Um, but yeah, so yeah, I was messaging different girls there. And so I wrote a message and I kind of had like a pretty much a hundred percent, uh, response rate from it. So yeah, I think they want to come here.

Yeah, that's kind of what my message said, too. It was like... Oh, what did it say? It was like, let me see. What did it say, guys? It said, like, hey, nice to meet you. Would you like to come move to America with me? Opening message? Like, yeah, like, let's see. Would you like to move to America with me? It's getting lonely in my apartment with my cat. Oh, no! With just me and my cat. Oh, no!

But hey, look, I think it was the right thing to say because like I said... I guess you were being honest. Well, yeah, I got 100% response rate. And they all said yes? Yeah, well, it started a conversation. How did you select the Nigerian princess versus... She's Cameroonian. Oh, Cameroonian. I think the other one was Nigerian. How do you do...

How did you select this one versus the Brazil, the Russia, this? Well, she was the one I got along with the best, and I thought she was very beautiful, obviously. Have you met? Oh, yeah, we have now. That's why I got all the clothes. You went there? Yeah, I went there. So you only met once?

So it was like the before the 90 days series? Yeah, basically. Well, to start the process, you have to meet in person once. So like you're not allowed to do the immigration forms until you've met in person. So like we had to meet in person. Like we've been talking for two years. Two years, no meeting. Yeah, well, it was hard. How long were you in Cameroon? Oh, two weeks. Maximum vacation time, yeah. Two weeks and we're close to the town. We're giving money to the village.

Well, yeah, but I've been talking to her for two years and like, you know, we kind of decided like, so there's, there's like more backstory. It's because I dated the Brazilian girl first because she was able to come to the U.S. Like, cause Brazil's like on the approved countries list, right? So they can just get a travel visa and come over. So she came over and she- Wait, who did?

Of Brazil? Of Brazil. So one other prospect came. One other 90-day fiancé prospect came? Yeah, another 90-day prospect came. So that went good and bad, but mostly probably bad in the end. I guess we just didn't get along. Do you have something for someone?

Someone that like, like a international kink or something like, is there, it's not, it's not, it's not a bad thing. I'm not, but the fact that the only people you were talking to was international was like, did you have a hard time dating nationally? Well, well sort of, right? Like that's what I was saying. Like when I'd go on like a Tinder and like, yeah, but you could have got someone in Florida. Right. Well, yeah. Well, I guess the quality was higher.

The quality was higher, yeah. Okay. So it's like, you know. So accent. Ding, ding, ding. Well, no, it was just like they're nicer, prettier, like, you know, smarter, you know, like. But aren't you not afraid that, wait, why did the Brazilian one not work out? Sorry, we will get to the finances. This is very interesting. Because she's a fiery Brazilian, you know. You guys fought? Yeah, a little bit. What did you fight over?

Well, just all sorts of stuff, honestly. But like, so she would drink a lot, you know, like a little bit finances because so she was here and she was staying with me and-

You know, I'd be like, hey, she was like, I'll let her borrow my car. Right. And then so she would like need to get gas. And I was like, oh, hey, just come with me to Costco. I need to get gas, too. And she's like, get really mad like that. We couldn't just go to this other slightly closer gas station. And then, you know, I'd be like, oh, hey, maybe, you know, shouldn't like.

spend so much of your money like on beer. Like, you know, like your percentage of money you're spending on beer is like pretty high. So like she got kind of mad about that. And then there's just like all sorts of stuff like the air conditioning. How much did you pay to the tribe? A thousand dollars. A thousand? Yeah. I mean, pretty decent price. You bought her for a thousand dollars. I mean, it's like, I don't know if I want to use that language for that continent, but. Wow.

Well, yeah. I mean, it's a dowry. It's a tradition. If you look up Cameroon bride price, it's like a thing. And like actually on 90 Day Fiance, right? Like they had a Cameroonian on there, but it was a guy. So then-

Did you watch that show as a tutorial? Yeah, actually, when I was going over there. Because it was a guy from Cameroon, so I just wanted to see what was going on. But yeah, so then the American girl had to be bought. And then her parents were just like, what? You're buying our daughter? Yeah, so definitely a thing. How does it feel? And I know that this apparently...

Like this is a big part of the finances. This is this international thing bringing her over. So like I get it. This is this is the big part of the financial audit. And we're talking about it right now. But are you what's your thoughts on the fact that all those women, including the one that will be coming in, the one that has come literally agree to that first message about just using you to come to the United States?

Oh, well, I wouldn't say that. Your opening message was, do you want to come to the United States? Yeah, yeah. Well, because that's like the ultimate goal. They don't know you. That's like the ultimate goal. But they don't know you. The only thing they knew was...

this is a way to come to the United States. Yeah, so okay, the Brazilian was able to come, right? So she was already looking to come. And then she didn't actually come for, I guess, two or three months after we started talking. So it wasn't like, hey, come here. No, I get it, but they're using you as the ticket to get here. How does this feel? Okay, what happens after five years? Okay, the alternative is me go there. Did I want to go live in Brazil or did I want to go live in Cameroon? No, probably not.

What happens after five years of marriage? Less consequences kind of cut that ties. Like I said, we get along. What if her mission is just to get here? That was your opening message. I'm not saying it 100%, but that was your opening message. That's the first thing they knew. The first thing that started the conversation was, this is their way to the United States.

Yeah, I mean, I guess that's a really negative way to look at it. But that was your opening message. No, hey, it's fair. You didn't bring it up once they knew you. Yeah, but the whole time people told me, oh, when you go over there...

Are you sure you've talked to her? Are you sure she's not catfishing you? Are you sure you're not going to get kidnapped? Unless she's not at least catfishing. There's this huge list of things that everyone told me to worry about. Oh, you're not going to get along. It's going to be different when you meet in person. But we'd been talking for two years and we'd been doing video calls pretty much forever. I get that. That's not what I'm saying. No, we genuinely get along and we smile when we talk to each other. Okay. I smile with my friends when I talk to them. Yeah.

Yeah, okay. And co-workers, and you. That doesn't mean we're getting married. I love me and you. I don't think it's a high concern right now. I think the probability is relatively low. That can happen with people even that live next door to you. No, of course. But your probability is higher. Yeah.

I mean, is it though? When you only talk to the people that responded yes to wanting to come to the United States from your opening message, I would suggest so. I don't even ask what your job is. What do you do for a living? So I do software engineering. Okay, cool. So you make some money. What are you making? Well, so...

I guess all income sources right now, after taxes, after medical bills and all that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, what hits a net? Sure. Yeah, okay. $10,000. A month? Yeah. Yeah, dude. Absolutely killer. I know some foreign-born princesses would love that. That is great. Yeah, but when I met her, I didn't make anywhere near that much money. What'd you make? $10,000.

It was probably more like $3,500. A month? Yeah. $3,500 a month? Well, that's probably about $3,000 more a month than their annual GDP per capita. Yeah, she doesn't make a whole lot of money. What does she do? Is she going to come here and mooch? She does eyelashes and she does hair stuff. Right. Yeah.

Right, right, right. Well, eyelashes is pretty lucrative here. It's just not there as much. Yeah, but will she do it legally here? Yeah, once we get her a green card. Uh-huh. Cool. And what happens after three years of marriage and she has a green card? Because you pretty much got to be married like three years with a green card. Yeah. And then they can get divorced and then just be on a green card. Yeah, but you can always, like anyone you get married to can divorce you.

I mean, that's probably why you're not married is because you're worried about that. I mean, I was too. To be fair, I was too. I was worried about that. No, I just specifically know this one guy here in Austin, Texas. I don't know him personally. I actually know the girl. But they got married. She was from, I think, China or Taiwan. Well, it was just over there. And she...

You got married, got the green card, two to three years after marriage. Done. Done. Out. Out. And now she's just trying to run with the green card. Yeah. Hey, I mean, it's definitely a possibility. But like I said, you know, I'll have to judge her character, right? And so I judged her character. Well, $10,000 a month is great. Why the fuck are you so fucking?

I didn't think it was that bad.

It was mostly just like the trip and some medical expenses. And those medical expenses, you know, honestly, that's one of the reasons that... Medical expenses? I don't know. I see a ton of purchases on this first credit card alone that has a high... I don't think this is just medical. No. One, two, three, four, five, six... No, I don't see one medical expense here. How much did you put on credit cards medical expense? About $4,000. Okay, well, that's not even a fourth expense.

of your high interest debt. So I don't think that's the reason we're in this mess. Well, yeah, I mean, the trip and medical expenses combined is about... What trip? The trip to go get engaged. But there's so much spending on these credit cards right now, dude. You literally spent $2,216 more than you brought in this month.

Well, yeah. Well, because it's like a lot. When did you go to Cameroon? That was a lot of emergency fund spending. Why? Medical expenses and car expenses. What? Are you dying every month? What's happening? Does she know that we're dying? No, it happened in January and then the bills didn't come due until. What happened? Well, I'm not actually, they told me not to say so we don't get banned on YouTube.

Apparently, we can't mention specific. Okay. Okay. Okay. And when did you go to Cameroon? Two months later. Well, a month and a half after the medical. So March? Yeah, March. Okay. We're not looking at March's statements. Probably looking at April's. Yeah, we're looking at April's, so that doesn't fucking matter. I mean, you're looking at March's. I see April. April.

April, April, April, April, April, every April. Okay. I mean, I don't know. I mean, the April statement has March's payments usually, right? Like March is the one that comes out. April's minimum monthly payment maybe, but these are purchases being made in April. Okay. I mean, I sent you the statements April 15th. So like April wasn't even over yet. Wasn't over, but I am seeing some April in your spending in the last statement versus income. Yeah, I think I sent you some screenshots too, the more recent cards.

So there's... Either way, it's $2,000 more than you owed. Yeah, but like I said, a lot of it's emergency fund spending. Like, you know, when you have to do a car repair, when you have to do a medical expense. Okay, I had one large medical bill, but that still pushes you directly to the edge. Yeah, no. Well, yeah, I said I'm not going on a trip to Cameroon every month. I'm not getting engaged every month. Like, the trip cost me like eight grand or something. I don't think the trip was on the statement, buddy. Okay, so...

In general, what is going on? Because even if it was just that spending, let's just say, if it was one month, two months of bad spending, I wouldn't have this much money.

I mean... What is going on? Because you're making too much right now to be this... I think... I mean, I think we'll just have to dive into it. Like, I think you're... But I want to see self-assess why you think it's... Well, I guess we did. You think it was medical and travel. But this wouldn't all be existing just for that. Well, and I mean... That explains a month. Yeah. And I mean, it's mostly... Yeah, I mean, that's mostly when...

Probably, because I wasn't making this income for that long of a time. Well, how long have you been making this job? Essentially since, you know, well, I mean... And why did you use an emergency fund to go to Cameroon anyway? Is that an emergency? Well, it kind of is. No. Well, okay, so like... What? How? In what world is that an emergency? Because we can't get married and we can't be together until I went there. Why didn't you save up for it? I did. That's what an emergency fund is. No, an emergency fund is for...

emergencies and then a trip can be saved up for as a trip fund okay so this is how I looked at it it's like look if the longer I delay it right you wouldn't have to you make money though you could have budgeted in a trip I assume Cameroon isn't the most expensive trip in the world I mean it was pretty expensive what

Like I said, it cost about $8,000 all told to do like the engagement. Like I had to pay the dowry. Oh, well, that, but it's not the trip. Okay. I see what you're saying. Yes, you had to pay your tax to purchase a wife. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, and then I got an engagement ring. Oh, for fuck's sake. Okay. Was that included in the $8,000? Probably. Okay. Maybe we didn't need that purchase. I mean, I don't know. It probably was. Yeah, I'm including it in the $8,000. Yeah. Okay. For sure. At least you're bringing the diamonds back to their origin. Yeah.

Look, private student loans can make it feel like you're one missed payment away from selling your grandma's heirlooms. I miss you, Grandma. YR5 says, chill!

No, no more sacrificing the family jewels. They don't reduce you to a credit score number. They just want to see if you're actually planning on paying. By the way, they're providing interest rates under 6%, which is practically a unicorn in the student loan jungle. I mean, some lenders want to charge you so much, you'd swear they were putting your first born on layaway. So if you're tired of monthly payments so high that you can't afford a single sweet treat, YREFA's got you. They'll arrange your repayment plan, ease the monthly hit,

and even let your poor cosigner off the hook. Mom or dad, they can finally breathe. You think you'll just get stuck on a call center wait list? Guess what? 4.6 stars on Google says why Refine actually picks up and treats you like a real human, which is a shocker, right? In finance, that's something as rare as me not slamming a desk every episode. What? So if you're done fantasizing about robbing a bank, don't do that.

By the way. But just check out YRefi. They're here to help you actually crush these loans without selling your kidneys on the black market. Go to Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash hammer. That's YRefi dot com slash hammer. Or call 888-YRefi-78. That's 888-YRefi-78. And see how a real personal approach can help you escape the private loan nightmare. Because, let's be honest, living with crippling debt till you're 90 is not the retirement plan you dreamed of. Ha!

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So, and then I also bought some sort of stuff in advance. So, like, I know she's going to come over. Well, I don't know. But the plan is that it takes- You don't know? Well, I don't know how long it's going to take. Okay. Right. So, like, early side, she gets over here around November. Late side, you know, February. Okay.

So that's why I didn't want to delay it even more. What's life going to look like financially when she's here? What does she want? What is happening? Is she going to be like a f***ing milker? A lot of the times on those shows, they are quite needy and they want to do a lot of things. They get a little upset if they don't get allowances. It's very interesting. And it's also boring if they don't have any kind of work permits or anything. It's like...

what do they do with their time? So like, what are you going to do? Well, yeah, yeah, definitely. Well, luckily I do work from home so we can like still, oh, I mean not a hundred percent of the time, but like a lot of the time I work from home so we can spend some time there. Um, and that's one of the things I bought in advance was try to get like, um,

Plenty of entertainment stuff set up to get season tickets and stuff to various things. Do you guys agree on everything? Do you guys disagree on this money? No one agrees on everything. Money related here. Well, she doesn't really have...

What about her expectations of it, though? Their financial situation over there is a little different. I know, but what are her American Dream expectations? Remember, she responded to the opening message, do you want to live in America? Well, yeah, I mean...

That's a good question. I guess we'd have to ask her exactly what her expectations are. You don't know? You talked to her for two years. Well, I mean, I've talked to her, but like, you know. She hasn't expressed things? Yeah, I mean, well, she said that kind of stuff doesn't matter to her as long as she has like the basic, because it's like where she's coming from. Not where she's coming from, but she wants to be here forever.

Yeah, yeah. Fine. How about this? Why does she want to be here before she knew you? I've been to where she lives there. It's not very nice. Why does she want to be here specifically before she knew you? Because she responded to the application to come to the U.S. essentially.

Yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people there want to get out. You know, I think that's like a, you know, they watch movies and stuff and they see like it's like nicer. Like, I mean, I don't know exactly, but that's kind of like my gist of it. And then, you know, I went, I've seen where she lives, you know, and like...

I would just say most Americans wouldn't be willing to live there. Not that it was that bad overall, but like just in general, they probably wouldn't be down for it. And then, you know, like their power cuts out all the time, stuff like that, just like small annoyances. Yeah.

Yes. Okay. And so that's not the reason you guys are getting married. Okay, maybe it is. But I think when she comes over here, the main thing that's going to change financially is I spend a lot of money on food already. Not like eating out, but just like on food. Why?

Well, to get good quality food, man. You don't want to get that gross CAFO beef. You want to get some nice grass-fed, dry-aged. I don't know. You had more going out to eat than you had groceries. Well, that's probably... $600 going out to eat. Okay, that's not true. That's just not true. That is math. Yeah, but I didn't spend $600 going out to eat. Maybe you got some of my grocery purchases in there or something.

I've only been out to eat four times this year, maybe five times. One of them was today. We had some burgers. What is... Yeah, knockabout burgers. That was the first time I went out to eat. That was one. We had some adding up of sweet treats that we were stopping and getting. Oh, it's $25. No, some adding up. We had about $198.63 of sweet treats. Where?

We'll go through the statements, buddy. I haven't gone through them. What's Carter County meat? Yeah, grass-fed beef. That's beef. So, okay, you spent more just on grass-fed beef specifically than you need to on groceries in an entire month that you could in a budget-friendly way. Right, right. I could eat less. And just meal prepping in general. You spent more on just grass-fed beef than...

Someone who's trying to budget and live a better life. What are your goals? What are you trying to do other than bring someone over? Okay, even if I got Costco beef, right? Like, okay, that's 30 pounds. That's 30 pounds of ground beef. So even if you bought 30 pounds of ground beef from Costco, I mean, I'd save probably like 33% on it or something. Like, I pay about nine-something dollars per...

a pound and I think you can get Costco ground beef. And that's after Texas, nine something after Texas. So like Costco ground beef after Texas is like maybe six something. So I'm saving like $3 a pound. So, but it's the problem. How much meat are you eating? Dude, like over a pound a day. Okay. That's what I'm saying. Like, and then there's more groceries on top of that. Yeah. I mean, I spend a lot of money. 148 at Trader Joe's and King Scoopers, 139. Yeah. King Scoopers is groceries. Why are you,

What's your water situation? You're not in Cameroon. Right. I know. But I get, well, okay. Yeah. But that's like three months worth of water. And that's more important than not going further into depth.

You don't have filtered water. I do. I use it for tea and coffee. But that's like, it's like kind of mineral water. So it works like a, okay, it's super hydrating and it gives you magnesium. But let's just think about life where we are because this is what you're prioritizing. If that's where life is, fine, you can prioritize it. Obviously, we're going further in debt, so maybe we don't when we're trading our emergency fund. But what are your goals? What are we trying to do?

Well, okay. So now that I'm getting married and she's going to come over here, I guess sort of the goal is to want to buy a house. Okay. Now that's a good goal. So you're hammering on the debt over here. Oh, yes. You have $20,000 in bad debt. Okay. But I haven't paid any interest. Substantial. I haven't paid any interest. So is it bad debt? Well, debt to income ratio, they'll look at it. And they're on credit cards, which will accrue interest. But they haven't. Doesn't matter. They will.

Okay. But- If you don't pay them off and you're not. Yeah, I'm trying to save up for a house. So, yeah, like, you know, that's kind of like- Save up how much?

Well, you know, you got to get a down payment, right? And so like, I know you're like into real estate, like you mentioned all the time. So I'm hoping that like, you know, we're on a real estate bubble right now. And when all these foreclosures come up, that like the market looks a little bit better and maybe on that down payment. It's a big hope. I mean, but there are like, there has been foreclosure insurance for the last like four years. Yeah.

But what if that doesn't happen? What if rates drop soon? People are able to refinance onto more affordable things. It's not even rates. It's like the fact that- No, it's not even rates. But if people are near that level of foreclosure, if rates do drop, they might be able to refinance into a more affordable situation that allows them to get into something they can afford and not get foreclosure. Yeah.

That's true. I don't know. Banking on that, something that's happened a couple times in American history. Good luck if we're waiting for that? A lot of the indicators are looking like 2008. It's looking like 2007 right now. I really want to get a house because A, she's coming over. Yes, I get that. And then I was trying to start doing some chicken farming.

Okay. Software engineer or farm? I don't know. Well, okay. So eggs are super expensive, right? And typically they're like, you know, not okay. But you make a lot of money. They're tortured eggs. Okay. But you're able to, you get grass fed beef. You know, you can get better eggs. Yeah.

Yeah, but they're like ridiculously expensive. But you make great money. If you're giving me a hard time about the grass-fed beef, like how do you feel about paying like a dollar an egg? It's less about that. It's more that you're going into an entire house purchase just for this. If it was you're able to do that in your current situation, like I don't care. Well, yeah. I mean I did try to have the chicken live at the apartment, but then it got evicted.

It got evicted? Yeah. What is a chicken getting evicted? Okay. So I guess like there's this girl I was kind of dating. Was she American this time? Yeah, she was, well, Native American. But so, yeah. I mean, it wasn't like we had dated before. And then so I guess like.

I felt kind of hopeless because I was unemployed at the time. So I didn't think I could do this whole Cameroon thing even though that's what I really wanted to do. Wait, you wanted to do this while you were dating the other one? Okay, what I'm saying is I've been wanting to do the Cameroon thing for like two years. Yeah, but you were dating this Native American girl while this was happening.

Well, we weren't really talking so much. Does Miss Cameroon know this? Yeah, she does. She's okay with it? Yeah, I mean, she dated some people. So you just needed some local company as you were waiting for the big migration? Sort of. Okay. But it was more like we were more friends than we were like serious. Oh, they're saying the Brazilian was also an overlap. Yeah, well, yeah, the Brazilian too. Yeah, I mean, yeah.

Because we were just talking. Well, you know, there's like no, yeah, anyway. Go on. Chicken eviction. Okay, yeah. So, yeah, I guess she got kind of mad because like I said, it was more like a friend thing like for me at that point. Like we weren't really like, you know, hooking up a whole lot. And then so she was like kind of mad about that. That you weren't fucked? Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Well, probably because, you know, I had my heart in other places. But, yeah, so anyway. Hey, Pookie. Our Memorial Day sale is happening right now, and it's your shot to grab some of the tools you need to own your financial future. Yeah! Yeah!

And for 10 short days, May 23rd through midnight on June 2nd, every single one of our classes is discounted. Pick any individual course and slash 20% off! Just $157 each. Or you can go all in with the complete Master Your Money bundle and save...

$237 at 30% off. So you can secure the core four courses at a massive discount. And inside, you'll find step-by-step lessons on budgeting, crushing debt, and beginner to advanced investing. Everything you need to start making smarter money moves today. And this deal disappears the moment the clock hits midnight on June 2nd. Click the link in the description below. Lock in those Memorial Day savings before they're gone. Take control of your financial future today. See you in the classes.

So she was kind of mad about that. And then like, so leftover from the Brazilian girl, like I had these lingeries and so they were just like in my closet. And then I guess she like went into my closet for some, not even my closet. It was like the closet in my office and,

Um, so like she goes in there and she sees them and then she just like freaks out and, and I'm like, well, they're not, there's, it's kind of like not, it's like a long story to get to a chicken leaving. Well, yeah. Okay. I'm getting there. I'm getting there. So, so anyway, she finds the lingerie and gets really mad and starts throwing stuff away. And then I got kind of mad at her for doing that. And then we kind of broke up. And then like right after we broke up,

And, you know, like, I don't know, three days later, the chicken police came to my house. What the fuck is the chicken police? I mean, this is the chicken police. I mean, I don't know what you want me to tell you. They just knocked on the door and they said we need a, like, it's kind of like, you know. Was it an indoor chicken? It lived on the balcony.

So I made like a back. I'm not sure. Neighbors love that. Well, okay. They're right. Okay. But if it was the chicken like that, I thought you were all about moral space and for the chicken to run. It's a lot more space than like, if even like those, even the open pasture chickens, like they, they put them like, okay. Yeah. Yeah. But it's still a balcony though. Yeah. Yard. Yeah. I took it for walks.

You take your dog for walks? Are you torturing your dog by letting it live inside? No, but I don't keep it on a balcony. So the chicken police come and they're like, oh, this is like a safe, habitable, like, you know, it's warm area. You have a heater for the chicken. It's like a, you know, safe environment. It's like a happy chicken. And then...

So then like three days later, then the apartment complex sent me a letter. Fair enough. And they were like, hey, you know, this chicken violates our pet policy. You have 24 hours to get rid of it. So then I had to find like a different home for the chicken. And so it kind of, I fostered it at a friend's house. And then, um,

So, you know, maybe one of the eating out things you have down for me is like a kombucha subscription I have. No, that's probably in the subscriptions though. In the kombucha network, there was someone that I was able to... In the kombucha network? Okay. What do you think there are in the world of finances? Zero to 10, zero being the worst, 10 being the best. I mean, probably four. Probably four. We'll see. We'll see.

I highly doubt it if you're on the show, I'll be honest, but things have surprised me before. If you want to see where you stand in the world of finances, take the assessment. Go to calebhammer.com. You can also go to calebhammer.com slash apply if you want to be on the show. Don't forget, if you don't want to end up like a guest on the show, make sure you're downloading my budgeting app. And if you sign up for the annual version, I'll send you our budget-friendly cookbook, which can't be purchased anywhere. I'll sign it, and I'll send it directly to you. All right, guy. Well, so do you want to know the chicken's name?

Okay. It's Harriet Potter, the chick that lived. Because I tried to hatch a bunch of chickens and only one survived. Stop! You have a chase freedom card. I love the chase freedom card. It's a classic.

Is this the OG freedom? I don't fucking know, dude. You tell me. Okay, I mean, I have three, Chase. The man has found love. He is giggly. I have three. $6,500. Okay, that's the unlimited. $85.77 with a minimum monthly payment of... I can't tell. Yeah, I don't know. Never made a minimum monthly payment.

What is the minimum monthly payment? Honestly, I don't know. It's usually probably like $40. Okay, $40 minimum monthly payment. And on here, pending lands end for PayPal and PayPal and PayPal and PayPal. Oh, educationalaccess.com. That one's blacked out.

Carid.com? Carid.com? Oh my gosh. Summit, Rock Auto. What the fuck is going on with your car? What are you doing? So that was oil filters, wiper blades, air filters. You had to do it all at once? Yeah. In a month you couldn't afford it?

but it's got introductory interest, so it doesn't have to be paid right away. Yeah, but it's still spending that could have gone towards other things, like not draining our emergency fund and cash flowing our trip to Cameroon. Right, but I'm going to need all that stuff anyway. I know, but you didn't have to do it that time. They had a PayPal promotion. When does the interest-free period end? Like in a few weeks.

Yeah, but I'm getting paid. You're getting paid. You also have fucking bills. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Yeah, good luck. Okay, Birkin Brands. Birkin Brands? Oh, that's coffee. Oh, it's okay. That's not what I was thinking. Well, it's like coffee beans. Parts Geek.

Blacked Out, Blacked Out. Is that HBO Max? Yeah, it's $3. Okay. Burke Brands, Mountain Star, Knockout Burgers, Denver's Art Complex, Land's End. Is Land's End also Blacked Out?

No, that's close. I bought them in November, but the product wasn't available. In likely miscellaneous bullsh**, and we'll go through everything, we're seeing about almost $1,000 of purchases in miscellaneous bullsh**.

I mean, you're calling necessary car parts? Denver Arts Complex, Bomba Socks, Land's End, Denver Center, Colorado Symphony, Event Tickets, Chamber Orchestra, Alibaba, and Staples. That added up to about $1,000.

Yeah, those were the season tickets I was mentioning. Yeah, that's all miscellaneous bullshit. Yeah, that's fair. That is not car parts. That is $1,000. That is payoff debt before interest accrues. That is giving to the village. That's $1,000. It goes a long way. No, that's fair, yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, but like I said, this is when they're doing the season tickets, so I figured it was better to get them now. Yeah, but you spent it in a month where you spent $2,500 more than you made.

Yeah, but... An interest accrues in a couple weeks. Okay, we have another freedom card. Yeah, that one shouldn't have anything on it, though. I used to think life insurance was one of those someday things. Like, I'll get to it someday after I organize my receipts, fix my car, figure out what my HSA actually does. And then I realized waiting doesn't protect your family. Which is the literal reason for life insurance.

Fabric by Gerber Life makes it ridiculously easy to stop putting it off and get term life insurance right now. It's a simple, proactive way for parents to help protect their families so they can have more financial security in case something happens. This isn't some old school binder in the attic kind of term life insurance.

It's built for busy people like you, especially parents. You can apply online on your own schedule and potentially get covered in under 10 minutes. And you might not even need a health exam. Even if you've got life insurance through work, it might not be enough for what your family actually needs to get by if you're not around. And heads up, it probably doesn't follow you if you switch jobs. Fabric stays with you because the policy is yours. Fabric has flexible plans that fit your family and your budget, and it's affordable.

like a million dollars in coverage for less than a dollar a day, affordable. That's peace of mind and a budget win. It's backed by Gerber Life, trusted by families for over 150 years, and they've got over 1,900 five-star reviews on Trustpilot. And Fabric isn't just term life insurance. You get access to free digital wills, investment tools for your kid's future, and a dashboard that fits in your pocket. It literally could not be easier.

So join the thousands of parents who've already done this with Fabric. Protect your family's financial future today. Apply right now in just minutes at meetfabric.com slash Caleb. That is meetfabric.com slash Caleb. M-E-E-T fabric.com slash Caleb. Let's get back to the episode. If you want to earn up to $5,000 every single year just for holding your investments, keep listening. This one's wild. Today,

Today's sponsor, Silo, is flipping the entire brokerage industry on its head. And all the big guys are out there dangling lame one-time deposit bonuses. Silo said, yeah, we can do better. And so they did by becoming the world's first cashback investing platform. If you deposit using my link, Silo will boost your balance by 1% every single year for life. And that's not a typo. Every year forever.

ever. I'm a cashback member myself. I've got $100,000 in the S&P 500 ETF VOO with Silo, and I'm earning $1,000 in bonus cashback every year on top of the market's 9% growth. Normally, that just grows to $3.2 million by retirement, but the compounding bonuses, we're talking $3.8. That's $600,000 extra dollars just parked in my investments in the same fund with Silo.

And all this? It just starts at $10 a month. And I already took advantage of it. And if you're investing long term, you honestly should too. If you want to earn up to $5,000 every single year, don't wait. Use my link, silomarkets.com slash Caleb, to start earning bonuses for life. Let's get back to the video. Well, it does. $3,960.96.

with a minimum monthly payment of $108. How long does this take to pay off if you're not purchasing, which by the way you did, $267.64. How long does this take to pay off only minimum monthly payments?

Which is what you did last month, by the way. Right, because it's an interest-free period. Yes, but how long does it take to pay off? Well, there is a reason to pay more towards it. The amount that is necessary without purchasing that pays it off before the interest accrues. Wouldn't it make more sense to put that in my high-yield savings account and earn interest on the money? I guess. You're finessing a couple dollars there, and you're on this show where you, like many other people... I mean, you're right. I'm finessing.

done. A couple dollars versus a mistake of losing $50 in interest like that in one month. Yeah, that's fair. But that's why I'm doing it. I get it, but the finessing... People have...

have there are so many people that have come on the show that try to finesse and i don't want you to end up like that you were so close how long does it take to pay off i have minimums only no what do you think uh what do you think 108 times so probably like four years 14 years 14 there's interest will kick in well see that that minimum monthly payment it's a little skewed it's not actually 108 that's because okay there's like a problem with my automatic payment and um

What? Because I'm automatically... Well, Chase... It's a complicated story. But the point is it's coming out of my savings account to automatically pay it. But then when Chase runs that, they run it as a checking account and then it gets denied. So then I have to do... I end up having to do a manual payment for the Chase cards. So it's like a $29 minimum monthly payment plus a fee for being late. That's why it's so long. There is a late fee. Yeah.

14 years is going to take a lot longer when it goes with that. And I get it. It was f***ed and it was a situation outside of your control. But this is what happens. We try to finesse. We get complicated. We spread all our s*** too far. Then all of a sudden, uh-oh, we're out of control of this account. We lose our ability to fully manage things. Late fee hits. And it's the Denver Art Complex. King Scoopers. Max. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

The balance for this interest rate would have ended a couple weeks ago. Yeah, it did, but then the payment's not due for a month after that. Ooh, sketchy world, man. That's putting yourself in a scary situation. You have a wife coming. Well, that's how a normal credit card payment works, right? I know, but you're pushing yourself to the edge.

And you always have, like, what if a medical thing comes up and you can't just pay it off? I don't even think you can just pay it off with the way you do it, with the way you live life. But, I mean, the fact is, what if something else does pop up? You don't take that into account. Now you've drained your emergency fund to go to Cameroon.

I guess if there was a serious medical bill, but my out-of-pocket maximum is only $8,000 and I've paid $4,000. So absolute maximum, I could pay maybe $4,000 more. There's so many more emergencies. A car breaks down. It did. It did break down. Well, there you go. That's why I'm buying car parts. That's why they're an emergency because they're unpredictable.

And you put yourself in a risky situation with leading this entire huge balance that's about to hit the interest rate, the $6,585, about to hit interest rate.

You're okay with that? I mean, no. Especially with a wife coming and you want to get a house. Right. You'd get a house without an emergency fund and then all of a sudden a big expense would happen and you wouldn't be able to cover it. Yeah, well, see, that is kind of a worry. That's why I feel like it's safe. That's why I don't have a house and why I'm renting is because...

You know, the loss of freedom and then the loss, you know, just like you're just, you know, what happens if you have to do repairs? Insurance rates are going up, you know, that kind of thing. So it's just kind of like a, it seems scary to do the house. But I mean. Do you want to then? I do. Yeah, I do. Because like I said, you know, I want to like have like the chickens and the goats and the sheeps. I'm like, you know.

Just be able to do what we can with the house, make some of our own decisions. You can't tear the house up, I guess, if the landlord's in charge. And then in the situation where you're going and, of course, spending more than you made on that monthly basis, it's the prioritization of things. Again, all the car parts, we talked about that. But then also, all that meat, the water's stockpiling over the course of a few months, even though you could have spread that over a few months.

Yeah. What are you prepping for? I mean, I'm not necessarily prepping. It's just like I'm at the store and then, you know, so I'll buy like four boxes of water or, you know, I'll buy like four jars of ghee or something. Okay. Instead of just one. But in months where you cannot afford it, you had to drain an emergency fund to leave. Credit card bill comes due with interest hitting very soon.

Because it was interest-free for that month, it's more like I had two months to pay it. So I was looking at it as a payment for the next month. I get it. But again, look what happens when we try to finesse everything. Yeah, no, you're right. It can happen. It's not a horrible mindset if we do it right.

I don't know. You seem like you're spreading things all over the place. I mean, I'm trying to do it right. Well, interest is about to hit like right now and I don't see $6,000, $7,000, $8,000, $9,000, $10,000, $250 laying around. You know, like I do save some money in some places. Like, you know, I spend a lot of money on milk because I make my own yogurt. But like milk's a lot. Make your own yogurt? Yeah. Oh, she'll feel great at home.

Yeah, well, the yogurt is a lot less expensive when you make it yourself. I guess. You want to play the real finesse game? The time you're spending making yogurt, you can probably pick up a contracting little thing for software engineering on Fiverr or something. Oh, well, it's super fast to make yogurt. I'm just saying. You literally just pour milk in a jar and let it sit out. I don't care. It's fine. You should make your own yogurt. I'm okay. It makes me shit.

Not only do I make yogurt, I make sourdough too sometimes. I'm into the fermented stuff, so I made kimchi, sourdough. Okay. Okay, yeah. I'm not against that. And then I guess one of the bad purchases I did, I mean, it was like, yeah, so I bought a bunch of computer parts because it sort of started when I broke my computer and

Because I was making sourdough in the winter and then the computer's warm. So then I set the sourdough on top of the computer and then it like overflowed. Or actually, I guess it was yogurt that did it. So now I have like four or five computers. Sell them! Pay off debt! I've been trying. Then you're overpriced.

Yeah, maybe. I mean, they're not priced that way. If no one's buying them, they're overpriced. The market says they're overpriced. Okay, what would you say? What? I mean, it's like a 40-70 super. Dude, I don't fucking know. It's what people would buy it for. If people aren't buying it, it's overpriced. I don't think it's that overpriced. Well, no one's buying it. It's not you. The other people are saying it is. You don't get to determine.

Okay, yeah, or maybe I'm just not selling the right place. You know, maybe Craigslist isn't a good place to sell anymore. You haven't tried Facebook Marketplace? I don't have a Facebook account. Make a Facebook account to sell them and then delete it. I don't know. Okay. I don't think that Zuck will care that much. Okay, look, this is a car, right? Wait. No, what is this? What has a $3,283 balance? This is what happens when people just send screenshots instead of statements because I don't know what the f*** we're looking at.

That is the... Oh, that's... Yeah, that's a Sapphire Chase card.

Okay, so Sapphire. That was like a car expense. That was my car repair. That $3,000 was a car repair. What happened? So my clutch went out. What's your minimum monthly on this? Minimum monthly. I mean, I see activity since last statement. Of course, you didn't send us the entire statement. Why would you? The statement hadn't come out yet. I got the card. In April, Korean restaurant, Pine Creek, Japanese restaurant.

Domestic auto. There's that one. Yeah, that was my friend's birthday and then the car payment. Okay. How much is this car worth? Well, it's probably not worth as much, but it's probably still worth like $16,000 or $17,000.

Okay, then it's not horrible. It's a lot of money to put into it, and I get it. Well, all this other stuff is coming up again. What if that happens right before car-to-car balance is about to accrue interest? Yeah, f***, then we already know that that's going. Also, we ran your car based on all the details you gave us, and we're giving a private sale value of $9,900. That would be if it was an automatic, but it's a manual transmission, so it's like more of a... I think we searched your VIN, though. Yeah, but I think it's because the manual transmission is super rare.

I don't know. We searched your VIN. It knows what car you have. Okay. It kind of sounds like your GPU is where you... I mean, look, if you go look up on CarTrader right now, Acura TL 2013 manual transmission, you won't be able to... So it's going to be like your GPU where you put it at a price you think and then no one ever buys it? No, I'm saying the only ones listed are listed at $17,000. If you go buy an automatic...

It'll be listed at 9,000. I don't know. We searched your VIN. I'm going to go off of the VIN. Okay, if you say so. Not off of looking at what a souped-up car might have or something. It's not a souped-up car. I don't know. Your VIN, though, says 9,000. Right? I mean, I don't know how you're searching it. I'm just telling you. Kelly Blue Book. Okay, yeah. I mean, I don't know how Kelly Blue Book gets their numbers. There's only five for sale at any time in the country, really.

And then they're all about $15,000. Okay, it's not the biggest deal. I don't really care. But that's what we got. Okay, what's the minimum monthly payment on this? I don't know. What do you think the minimum monthly payment is? Probably like $40. It's usually like about 1%, right? Okay, when does the interest hit on this? I'm assuming this is your interest-free. No, this one's not interest-free. This one, I put it on there because it was like expense of how to pay. And then there was like a... Why don't you put it on one of your interest-free cards?

Okay, because there's like the first $5,000 spend, you get $1,000 back, and then there's an additional .25 multiplier if you buy a plane ticket, and then Cassie, I'm going to need to buy Cassie an expensive plane ticket. Sorry, I'm going to need to buy my fiance an expensive plane ticket. And then so this essentially will cover the plane ticket. And then why, but then interest hits. Yeah, if I don't pay it, it will. Yeah.

This is a lot of cards have to pay the full balance off all at once. Right now we're adding six plus three plus three. Well, really six plus four plus three. You make 10,000 a month. Yeah. And my emergency fund. You're going to use an emergency fund. So really you've just kicked the can down the road and really all your savings is really going to it at the end. So really the savings were nothing.

Well, yeah, but they were earning interest. What? What APY? Like 4.35. Okay, so how much did you get? A couple hundred bucks? Yeah, like probably like a hundred and fifty. Great. And that's if you do this all right. All right, Wells Fargo. Here we have 4,000 hours of purchases. You paid off the last balance. It's the medical expenses. Oh, okay.

No, and two thing foods. You got some food as well. I think it was Costco. Yeah. There's also Alley Pay. Oh, that was a fraud. Randy's High Country Towin. Yeah, that was car emergency. Cater Country Meat. Yeah, we know that. Lockbox? Oh, that was the immigration fee.

Okay, so this was not all medical. A lot of this stuff was the stuff we were choosing to do right now. Maybe we don't do the medicals all at the same time. I didn't really have a choice. No, the medical you can do, not all that stuff at the same time. Yes, you did. Car repair, I get it. Well, yeah, I got to get my TARG code and then the other one was immigration fee. I know, but we could have maybe delayed a month when you had the money. But then it would delay her getting here a month. I get it. I get it. It's just putting yourself in a...

financially scary position. I mean, you know, like, doesn't Dave Ramsey say stuff like, you know, spend your money on, like, people and experiences? He doesn't say spend $2,500 more than you make in a month. Yeah. He doesn't say go into credit card debt. Why the f*** are you bringing up Dave Ramsey? He would never recommend the little finessing thing you're doing. He wouldn't even let you look at a credit card. I'm talking about the immigration expense. Doesn't matter. If you're going to bring up one part, you have to believe the f***. Well, I don't believe in the religious part, for sure. Well, either way, it doesn't matter. It's like...

Okay, yeah. You're finessing. He wouldn't recommend any of this. Yeah, that's probably true. Yeah, he doesn't like credit cards. I got a lot of them, it's for sure. What if you get laid off, man? Yeah, I mean, I'm worried about it. I mean, that's definitely, that's probably the biggest worry out of all the... Well, that's why you have a fully funded emergency fund. But again, you're saying you're using your emergency fund to take care of all this, which, by the way, is not a learned... It's not a good learning lesson because with that, you're essentially...

It's allowing yourself to spend more money, bailing yourself out. Then you have to cut back, build a fully funded emergency fund. Then you're allowed to live a crazy life and put your emergency fund towards it. You're not learning the behavior that fucked you into a situation that you can't afford other than bailing yourself out. And then what happens when you get laid off, if you get laid off? And hopefully you don't, but the tech market's a little interesting right now. Yeah, it is. And the rise of AI, who even knows? What kind of software engineering do you do?

I'm not at liberty to disclose that. It doesn't have to be the job. You can't say like what kind? I guess like C++. I mean, is that what you're looking for? Okay. So yes, AI could come for you, essentially. Yeah. That's a worrying position. Yeah, it's definitely worrying. And so I guess that's like sort of a question I have, like an educational question I have. So let's say you do have your emergency fund, right?

I'm not saying this applies to me. I'm just saying hypothetically. So let's say you have your emergency fund fully funded, but then an emergency happens, right? So then you use your emergency fund to pay. For an actual emergency? Sure. I don't think we agree on what an emergency is, but yes. Okay.

But then at that point, right, your emergency fund is no longer fully funded. Yeah. You'd agree with that. Then, yep, you scrapped down to zero and you build it all the way back up again. Right. And that's where I feel like I'm at. You're neither scrapping down to zero nor maintaining an emergency fund. You're draining an emergency fund and not scrapping down to zero to build it back up.

So you know the answer to it and you're not doing it. Oh, so I should scrap down to zero, like just get rid of all of it. Of course. It's an emergency not to have an emergency fund. Okay. Yeah. Okay. I can see that. An emergency fund keeps you alive for six months if you get laid off. It gives you options to go and find other jobs and unemployment help because you've been paying into that system as well. I'm not saying you're going to get laid off. Hopefully not. Hopefully you're very talented. It's like –

In the software engineer scale, you're making money. It's fine. I don't know where you stand, but you're living life on the edge, man. That makes me nervous, especially since someone else is fully jumping. They're jumping into the deep end. You're right about that. It's just the timing. It's like, hey, let's do... The trip...

And then the medical thing kind of happened at the same time. And then as soon as I got back from the trip, the car thing happened. Yeah, and that's welcome to emergencies. Maybe you should have used an emergency fund for a vacation. Well, we're being honest if we're being literal. And also, at the same time, your emergency fund was to cover you. When she comes here, that's a double person, an extra mouth to feed. You know, it's extra things. Maybe you put her, I don't know if you can get her on your insurance. I don't know. But whatever ends up being done. Well, yeah, I mean, you'll be married. I don't know.

So, like, it won't be able to cover her emergencies, and you would be her emergency fund. Right. Yeah. So you're putting it at risk for her for selfish desires. Yeah.

So you can prep, so you can do all this stuff, so you can have that miscellaneous bulls**t. $1,000, even in a month where you had some emergencies, which I vibe with. The car one, the medical. Can't do anything about that. Got it. Did not need to go to Cameroon that exact month, but whatever, you did. But either way, while all that stuff is happening, you still did $1,000 of miscellaneous bulls**t. Did not need to do. Your choice.

All well, what is this again? Six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 13, $13,750 of interest-free. That's about to be very interesting. That is about to slam.

This is a fun one. I get to get you free money and then I get to get myself free money. It's a pure win-win for both of us. What do you have to do? Sign up for a SoFi High Yield Savings account and get a welcome bonus of $300. Sign up for Acorns using my link and get

$20 instead of the usual $5. Finally, sign up for Silo and earn up to $5,000 in cash back on your own stocks. These offers have been negotiated to give us both more money than using traditional signup methods. So use the links in the resources section of the description below and get yourself $5,320 right now. Oh, plus the Wells Fargo, the Wells Fargo, because you're going to have to pay this as well or else interest will hit.

Again, you paid off – we could celebrate and be like, hey, you paid off the last month. It looks like you paid off every month. Well, it was a $100 balance. This time we're at $4,483.61. That's a chunky balance to also throw into the mix of the 6-5 and the 4 and the 3-2. So good luck. The minimum fee payment is –

$45 on this. I don't know how you're making all these payments. A double? You have to make a payment that is worth double your net income on a monthly basis. I don't know. Math's not adding up for me. Math's not adding up for me. And the visa thing, I get it. I want you to have the person you love here. I do! Being able to take care of her is also equally as important. And you're potentially f***ing her. With...

drain intermersive on that is also going to need to be here. And I'm being told, I mean, you bought your ski passes on here. You got $500 snowboarding boots, new bindings for 300. You go golfing all the time and you spend $70 on that. It's just like, you got a massive suit collection that you're spending money on graphic novels, CD collection. For some reason, it's just like, it's just endless. Yeah.

Buddy, it says endless. Oh, but you know, I do hate Spotify. So that's kind of why. Yeah, I mean, I guess I just was like, okay, so I started listening to classical music. And then I guess... Listen to fucking NPR then. Well, okay, yeah. But all I'm saying is like, I didn't want to pirate it. You've had fees this year, by the way. It's a $5 international purchase fee. It was very accidental. Fuck.

Well, everything's accidental to you when you do something wrong. Well, I didn't know it was an international purchase. You're going to accidentally do things wrong. I would have used a different color. Keep going. Classical music. Yeah, so classical music. Yeah, so it's like harder to download that, I guess, like illegally. And I guess that's technically illegal. So I just bought a bunch of like $2 CDs to kind of build up a classical music collection. And then I ripped it into FLAC files and put it on my player. You live in 2005. Yeah.

They didn't have flag players back then. You live in 2009. Yeah, that's more like it. I don't know, man. You can use the Fizz card, so at least you can only spend what's in your checking account. She'll need it, so I'll also put you guys through couples therapy through Sondermine when you guys get here. Three free sessions.

She'll need it when she realizes there's no way to keep her safe. And when she's ready to jump into the job market, I'll gift her a course career certification. Yeah, that would be actually pretty helpful. Yeah, it'll be good. City Double Cash. Does he send a statement? No. He sends a picture. Well, I couldn't send a statement because for the Sapphire and the City Custom Cash, I had just opened them. They were brand new cards. Are these screenshots of within there?

Is the city double cash? Yeah, that's the city. Okay. What's the minimum monthly payment? Don't give me your normal answer. I'm assuming it's probably, I think it's $40. I think it's $40. They're always like $40 for some reason. They want to squeeze as much interest out of you as they can. $788.20. Yeah, this is where we have the symphony. We went to the center. UCCS Presence Box.

It's $182. Yeah, I know what it is. It's like tickets to the theater. Oh, okay. And then Symphony was $396. That's the season? Yeah, that's the season. Okay. I like classical music too. I get it. You're in a situation. You're living a $150,000 a month lifestyle and $110,000 net a month. Really overspending. Access, ticket resale, chamber orchestra. Yeah.

Yeah, and those are all for next year. This is Destroy Our Lives for the Arts card, I guess. When does the interest start on this card? It's a new card. Oh, it's a 15-month away. Yeah, so 15 from now? Yeah, from now.

But yeah, you know what kind of upset me about that one? It's like I put all those on there because they're supposed to be like 5% cash back on, you know, live orchestra performance. It literally says orchestra. Really? Okay. Yeah, and as you see, they'll say orchestra, but they don't show up as orchestra. So I was kind of just like super disappointed. They counted as charitable donations. So you just got two? I just got one. Counted as charitable donations? Counted as charitable donation instead of a... Cling that.

Well, I'd have to itemize my deletions. It gets brutal. Probably wouldn't make sense. Okay. Capital One Quicksilver. You have so many cards, man. What kind of finessing are you trying to do? Well, I was just trying to get the 5% back on. Yeah, you're trying to get every cash back thing you can. Every intro, whatever. $841.04. Minimum monthly payment, $25. It's getting hot.

This takes five years to pay off, minimum monthly payment only, $853. Again, you got paid off the previous, what was the previous? $0, so not really. But this is a hotel. Wait. Yeah, this is a fuck up on my travel. Oh, so another accident. Yeah. Can't wait until you guys start having intercourse. Ha ha.

Accidents work real well for you. Then you got to have an emergency fund for those. Yeah. Yeah, no, I mean. Keep going. What's your little accident? We got Air France. We got Relay. We got Air France. I guess you can guess. And then Geography. I guess you can guess. No, no, I don't know. The wrong ticket? You fucking bought to Zimbabwe? No, I mean, I missed the flight. I missed the flight. And then, yeah, I had to rebook it. And now you're going to miss your payments before your interest hits.

You're predictable. That's the car I should have used on that international purchase because it has no international fee. So that's why I used it for this one because they were in France. So I had to get a hotel and I had to redo the ticket. See, the real issue with that one is like the ticket, you know, that's like one thing. But man, they overweighed my bag.

So, like, my carry-on bag, like, I was already through security and everything. And then they made me go back through and pay, like, $300 for it. That sucks. I mean, I don't know. I should have just thrown the books away. It's life things. It's the things you expect nothing to happen. And then life things happens, and then you're like, oh, I don't have to pay this extra shit. It always happens, and then it's going to happen. And then you delay all these things that you're going to have to pay $20,000 right now. It's like, look what happens, man. Okay, it's 0% until...

It's not. I don't see a date. Oh, it's not 0%. No. Okay, big balance coming. $841.04 on that. Add that onto the tally. Add that onto the tally. Okay. More. Let's keep going. It just keeps going, man. U.S. Bank, what? That was the one where they give you the global entry free. So that's why I got that card because I was doing a global entry free.

Oh. Yeah, it was coming in. Okay. Minimum payment, $40. You owe $235. I mean, it only has a limit of $500, so it's not like you can spend much on here anyway. I mean, you spent $593, but you put a little bit more towards it than the minimum. Yeah, you had to spend $500 to get the... So the credit line. To get the whatever $200 reward or whatever. Arts Complex, Uber Trip, Uber Trip...

A little bit of dental. Got some booking. Hotel. Uber, Uber, Uber. That's Uber. UPS, Walgreens, Radiology. Yeah, that makes sense. ER, yeah. Sitting at 21.24% interest rate on this one. Yeah, that's pretty low, actually. It's not low. For a credit card. Yeah, compared to like 30% credit cards, but it's not low. I'm shocked it's only 21%, to be honest with you. Okay. Are we celebrating? No, I'm just saying. I'm surprised. I feel like they're mostly like 28%, 29%, 30%.

Okay. U.S. Bank. This one we're not going to put in the deck because it's only $40 and it's a $40 minute payment. But you did purchase 204. What could that money have gone to instead? Well, that's my utilities card. So that goes to electricity and internet. Yeah, Comcast. Utilities. Is that all your debt? You're not O on your car? No, I don't know. That's good. Is that all your debt? Yeah.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. So all the credit cards that are about to come due is $20,217.92 or else interest will start accruing. And all the finessing we've done will go to... F*** you. It's only two months worth of pay.

Do you not have rents? Do you not have utilities? Do you not have food? We know you have food. Do you not have extra costs? The food's on there. I mean, the food's on there. You have future food to get, probably. I bet you're going to keep eating. But I bought it in events. How many months? I mean, at least one. Then you're probably going to go buy five for next month. Yeah. That's funny. Interest is about to start occurring, yeah. Okay.

I mean, yeah. I mean, at a certain point you eat all the food, but I do have like food. And you will have to spend money, money you do not have because two months gross, gross is what is needed to pay off this debt and a little more.

What is the staple, staple, scooper, scooper, or super, super, super, super, super, super, super, super, super, super, supers. I mean, I want to tell you the reason, but you're going to like probably. What? Okay, so they had like a promotion. Oh, super, super, super, supers. Look, look, look. Walmart, super, super, super, super, super, supers, supers, supers, supers, supers. You have credit cards that are about to fail.

get a crew interest. Super, super, super, supers. Can I get a... What? Okay. So that was like... Okay. So they had this promotion. You do every promotion you can find. Okay. So they had the... Well, no. It's just with the bank. So if you make a... I know. If you make a purchase on your credit card, they'll...

Not on your credit card, but on your debit card. They'll round up the difference. So I was essentially buying one can of cat food at a time.

to get the most roundup. And then like actually on that Staples purchase, it sounded like a couponer on that. Yeah, it took way too much time. And then they got mad and told me they would, it was suspicious activity. But so on the, on the Staples one, I actually made money on that purchase because it was like, how much, like $2, like 40 cents, but like, but no, it was like a 30 cent purchase, but they gave me 70 cents. Oh, on that purchase. What did you make across this whole thing?

Oh, I mean, I don't know. Like probably like 25 bucks or something. But yeah, it's funny. Like it was kind of an infinite money glitch. If you spend 30 cents and they give you 70, that's probably why they said it was suspicious activity. But like, hey, a real infinite money glitch there. Okay. $5 in this account. Capital one. I was curious. 505 went in, 500 went out.

Yeah, well, so they had a promotion. Oh my gosh, dude. They give you $300 if you do two direct deposits in there. You make $110. I'm not saying don't be frugal and do all these things. Your time could be better spent doing something else, especially in the world of what you do for a living. You could totally pick up some random little side projects. Yeah. And make more than you are –

The little bit of money you're spending on all this finessing. I get it's fun. I get it's fun. I am working that second job at night. What? Yeah, that's why my income is so high. Oh, so that's two. Yeah, yeah. Damn, I thought that was one. You definitely are on the chopping box for layoffs with what you're probably making in your software engineering job. We're about to hire some engineers for our apps soon.

Shoot me an email if you want to, but I mean, we're paying just the basic people what you make for both years combined. Oh, 52 cents in this one. $4,774 came in, $80 debit card withdrawal, and then $4,705 went out. What are we doing? Shh.

So it's going all over the place, the different Schwab check-ins and stuff. Yeah, it was because I was going to that trip to Cameroon. So these accounts all had international fees. So I got in a Schwab account that didn't have international fees. Okay. And that actually makes sense. That's a good finesse. That probably was worth the time investing $127. That's the Schwab account. Okay.

Okay, so here's the title. So $13,000 is your six-month emergency fund. I doubt it. It's not enough to live off of six months for you. What's your rent? Well, rent and utilities is $2,100. Okay, this is not enough for us. This is not a six-month emergency fund.

Right, I know. And it's going to be all gone to pay all these things. Which is, those are not emergencies. What you have done is a disaster and is not. You're not doing this right, okay? The finessing works if you pay it off and you can make the difference and all that stuff. You're having to use your emergency fund to take care of it. That does not count. That is not finessing. That is you putting yourself in a dangerous position. That is not good finances.

Simply put, I need to be clear because you feel like you're doing this right. You're not. You're destroying it. I know this wasn't like crazy finances type of episode, but you're still yourself. And there's going to be people out there that are related to this because they're thinking they're finessing. You're just you're draining your emergency fund. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you're right. I am draining the emergency fund. But that's because I had some emergencies earlier.

No, you f***ing, you're draining the emergency fund to pay off your credit card, which at least $1,000 just this last month alone went to miscellaneous b***h. Someone going out to eat, it wasn't crazy amounts. And it's not just the emergencies. You did not need to pre-buy all the water and all this bulls***. You did not need all the computers back then. You could sell at a reasonable price now and try to pay for things. You did not need to pre-order all those filters and whatever. You did not need...

to go to Cameroon right then at that moment. I know what you want to do. It's not about want. I'm talking about need, emergencies or needs. I mean, I could have waited indefinitely and she could never get a lot of the come over here. I didn't say wait indefinitely.

I did not say winter definitely. But maybe not the same month that all these bills are due and emergencies are hitting. Yeah, but okay. I didn't know. Okay. But like I planned the trip before any of those emergencies happened. So I didn't know it was going to be the same month. So that's like kind of how I got like in that situation. It's like, you know, I planned the trip, set it up.

Like right at the same time the medical thing happened and then and then as soon as I got back from the trips a car thing happened So it's just like I know rough time. Right, but you're I mean I'm saying I did a Thousand hours of miscellaneous bull some money going up these some other things as well. It's like you spent you still spent money What's that? What's that orange section? They're going out to eat which

It's a little higher because the beef was put in there, but it was still a couple hundred dollars going on. Was that big orange on the side? No. Large purchases. General large purchases that are a little harder to categorize. Okay. That is a sandwich raw, airlines ticket, tax payment. Tax payment? Oh, yeah. How to pay taxes. Tax payment.

But I paid them. Yeah, but again, you're doing this all at the same time. You're not willing to space. You can't space the emergency funder taxes. You can space the miscellaneous bullshit, which is just as much as the taxes. PayPal out $2,511, hotel booking, K-1 visa application fee, and international travel out. So it's a big, big chunk. $5,827 for all that.

Well, the good news is a little bit on the subscription side. Medical health care, that was a big chunk, obviously. Unknown shopping, very small. It's typically Amazon, Walmart. You don't really have that kind of stuff. Necessary food. We got that transportation and then housing. Well, the good news is like a lot of those purchases aren't going to be recurring. Yeah, but now you have $20,000 right now and you only have $12,000 for your emergency fund. So you still need to basically put all of your net income towards it to pay it off for a month.

It does not go the way you thought this was going to go. You tried to finesse. Push yourself way too close to the edge. That's a lot of 20 cent. Yes. 1,300 in retirement. Well, you're definitely not going to be a 4 out of 10 if this is your entire retirement. I thought that would be the one thing that would kill you. There is an IRA too. At 6,000 hours, you're still dramatically behind for your age. Dramatically behind for your age. And you have to catch up to an emergency fund again. So, I don't know.

Let's get your budget. $10,000 is the income. Woo woo. I mean, some time has passed, you know, so like I have gotten paid a few times. I've gotten paid, you know. What? I've gotten paid $10,000 since maybe more. What are you saying? Well, yeah, I'm saying I've been accruing income this whole time.

Yes, I assume you weren't making money. Well, I didn't say you weren't making money a month ago. Well, I know, but I'm saying a month has happened, so I've made a month's worth of income. And you had a month's worth of expenses. Yeah, yeah. But I pre-bought a lot of these. You pre-bought, but you're a pre-buyer, which means you're still going to pre-buy. And again, emergencies happen. You don't have that.

Debt payments, if we just set our minimums, $259. What's your rent and utilities all combined? 21. Does that include the internet? Yes. Phone bill? None. Okay, I'll do helium if you need it. Okay, gas, room, from, drive, drive? I got 150. Car insurance? Like 75. Okay.

Okay, I'll give you $400 for groceries. It's higher than normal, but still just meal prep, meal prep, meal prep. Try to live on the cheap until you get an emergency fund because it is an emergency not to have a fully funded emergency fund. Look at what's happened to your life. $100 for TP fund, anything else you need to survive, toothpaste, all that good stuff. Medical health care, co-pays, multi-basis medications. I mean, outside of this one emergency thing, I haven't really had any medical bills. Out of pocket? Okay. Yeah, I mean dental. What about your cat, age, health?

It's like 17 years old. Okay. No pet insurance. Cat food, how much? $70, maybe something like that. Gym? No. I do cartwheels in the park. Of course you do. Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not taken into account? No, not really. Well, yeah. I mean, the food budget's a little light, I guess, but...

All right. Well, I mean, this is as simple as it gets. What are we doing? It costs you $3,054 to survive on a monthly basis. $10,000 is needed. Yeah. Pay off the debt in a couple months. Take six months building an emergency fund. I don't know. This is pretty chill. Pretty easy. You just have to, like, just live on your needs and not go crazy. Right. Well, okay. But even with that, right? Like, how long? Like, that's going to take, like...

I mean, that's going to still take a long time to get a down payment for a house, right? Yes. Yeah. But you don't even think about that until you have a fully front-end emergency fund, so I don't care about that for right now. And also, you're only willing to buy a house once the market collapses and the bubble breaks, so...

Spending your budget, you overspent zero out of 10. I know that had to do with emergencies, but you still spent money that you didn't necessarily have to on some things as well, especially for that time. Debt, not great debt that's about to accrue, but it's not the worst debt by any means, especially for your income situation. I'll give you a two out of 10 there. Emergency fund, I know that'll go to that, but I would add to the debt score and take away from the emergency fund if I was calculating that part into it. So right now I'll give you a six out of 10 for emergency fund retirement.

Definitely behind for your age. Pretty intensely. Four out of ten. Maybe even a three, but I'll do four. I'll be generous. Zero out of ten. Hammer Financial Score, 2.5 out of ten. Guys, make sure to join us for the post show. We're going to hang out there. Make sure you join Hammer Elite. That's the best version of our YouTube membership because it's the best YouTube membership on the platform. The platform has even said so themselves. And...

If you don't want to be like this and you actually want to pay your bills on time and interest not accruing, download the Pudging app, sign up for the annual version. I'll sign the cookbook and I'll send it directly to you. Join us for the post show. Hello, my Cameroonian princess. How are you? I'm fine. How are you? His opening message was like, hello, would you like to come to the United States? I'm lonely. Yeah. How do we know you guys love each other if that was the message you responded to? We couldn't really say we love each other. $8,000 a day and he'll have no savings. How does that make you feel? Okay.

Some of it went to you.