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To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. I kind of want to discover what's going on with the audience. Okay. So I am going in blind. I know nothing. I decided to come here because I saw you on Hinge Six months ago. Are you f***ing kidding? F***ing what? I mean, I... You f***ing kidding me. I wish I was kidding. That is insane. Download my new simpler budget app today and take control of your money once and for all. And as an extra limited time,

Hi, my name's Carly. I'm 27. I live in Austin, Texas, and this is Financial Audit.

Thanks for coming in. What do you do for a living here in Austin? So I do social media support for a bank. For a bank. Okay. Are those huge social media pages? Banks? Who's following the banks? That's interesting. Okay. How much are you making? So I bring in around 56 before taxes. Okay.

It's about $3,400 every month total. Net? Is that what it said? Yes. How are we living in Austin on that? How does that feel? It feels okay. Yeah. There are, it feels a little bit better when it's a three paycheck month or it feels a little bit better when I get a stock payout. Okay, so you're bi-weekly. It's not semi-monthly. So sometimes you get the little three, the little special three. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's your rent? Yeah.

My rent is $1,300 after... That's a little expensive. After what? After pest control, pet fees, water, sewage. That's all included in the $1,300. Okay, so after the normal rent stuff that is in everyone's rent. Yeah. Okay, well... I think it's like $1,189 before you add all that stuff in, but... Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, I mean, 36. We're stretching it. 36% of your income. Yeah. Definitely stretching it, but for the Austin area, that percentage isn't the most horrendous, that's for sure. So...

What is going on? I'll be honest. I'm going in a little blind, a little more blind right now. We wanted to just test a little thing. And I'm curious why it just like I'm like, you know, I kind of want to discover what's going on with the audience. So I am going in blind. I know nothing about you. OK, what the fuck is going on? I feel like with my income, I should be in a better place than I am. And I know a lot of that has to do with.

me spending excessively mostly on fast food and we can't be doing that man yeah I know and so I'm assuming listen I'm assuming if you're on this show I'm assuming if there is a chunk of paperwork in front of me we got debt do I know your debt no because again self discovery process on this I don't know you when we're going

And we're just bending out. What are you doing? What does this look like? Is this a daily occurrence? What is our life? I mean, we're about to find out. So don't both. Yeah. So specifically for them, the December month that I sent you all my all my spending. I had just recently I've just recently moved and

And so my kind of excuse was that all my pots and pans are packed in boxes. And so let me just door dash here. Let me just stop at McDonald's here. Let me stop at Taco Bell there because all of my stuff was packed in boxes. And so because I'm lazy. Okay. Yourself confessed lazy. Yes. So what does this look like? Do you have something in your mouth? What is happening? Oh, it's a cough drop.

You sick? I was, but I'm doing better. When? Like last week. With what? I'm not contagious. With what? It was like a sinus infection. I'm okay. So you say you go out to eat all the time. Uh-huh. Oh, I'm scared. Why? Why would you be scared? I don't know. That's a big red. Why would you be scared? Because I know it's a lot. And I know that I have the ability to cook. What else do you do a lot? I go to Michael's a lot.

Because I live right next door to Michael's. So I do frequent the craft store often. Uh-huh. Why? Well, how much? Like, what are we talking? How often are you going? Like, what does this look like? So probably four, like maybe once a week. I stop at the craft store four or five times a month or so. And what else? I think that's, I mean, I know I spend a lot on- I see in here a ton of-

of Amazon as well. Oh, uh-huh. I do. So I get, um, my cat food, my cat litter, my toilet paper and my laundry detergent on subscribe and save. So those are the majority of my Amazon purchases. So Amazon got miscellaneous bullshit in this here pile that I have here. Have I looked at your purchases? No, but we have the math miscellaneous bullshit. Also,

and I'm going to need to see those f***ing fees and then going out. So I want to see where you assess yourself before we go into this world. This is your income.

Okay. This is your monthly income. Okay. Assess in three different piles what you think you spent on going out to eat. Okay. Miscellaneous bullshit. Okay. Just the extra thing. It could be video games. It could be whatever. It's just the extra miscellaneous bullshit. Yeah. And then fees. Fees alone. Okay. Okay? Okay. So. That's your total income for the month. Okay.

- 600 eating out. - The 600 that's insane for your income. - Yes. - What's 600? - I think I didn't really grocery shop for the entire month of December. - The entire month? - Yes, I think I went to the grocery store maybe like two times. - Good. - Probably 110 in fees. - Fees do we have going on? This is insane. - What was the last one? - Miscellaneous bullshit. All the extra stuff that just doesn't matter.

I'm going to say about... I'm being told they're overdraft on late fees, by the way. They are. How much is that? Like $180. $180. Give. So this is what you think you have left. So why would you have debt with this much left? How much goes to your rent? Let me see the rent. I want to see how much you think you have left based on your assessment of your financial situation. And why would it be going towards debt? Why would this fee pile exist? Fee pile exists. I don't think there's enough bills.

Well, that's not a good sign, is it? How could we have been running out? This is your income. Seven. Are you seeing a problem? Yep. Eight. Yeah. There's. Yeah. Okay. So how much did you say this pile right here is going out to eat? How much did you say this is? Probably 600. So you put $600 here. All right.

$859. $859 when you're not surviving and don't have enough money anywhere. Yeah. How much is this? Your fee pile? What did you put? Late fees, overdraft fees. What'd you put? 110. 182. Oh. Here's your miscellaneous bullshit. What did you put? 180. 595. Oh God. How are you surviving? How are you here?

How have you made it long enough to even sit across from us? How have you like made it? How have you done this? Yeah. The math doesn't really math. The math is not math. The math is not mathing there. How have you made it this far? I am genuinely curious. I don't know. So what is going on in your life then? Give us a little backstory and we are going to dive in to this. What is going on in your life?

I have just moved and I currently have a lease on a house that I'm not living in with my ex-fiance. But that's a little complicated because his boss is paying all the bills for the house.

Because he had to move to San Antonio. What the f***? Okay, okay. So what's your situation specifically in this? So me, I had to kind of move out of the house pretty quickly. Because the realtors were wanting to start showing it. And get someone in there so they could take over the lease. Ex-fiancé, how long were you guys together? We were together for just about three years. What happened? Um...

Well, it means we got pretty damn far. Yeah. So I think ultimately we just were not very compatible. He, I think, wasn't showing me love in the way that I wasn't showing you love, wanted to be shown love. How do you want to be shown love that he wasn't? So it was a lot of like intimacy issues. What? It wasn't diddling.

Yeah. And there were... You know, I suggested that we go to therapy together. And he kind of...

every time to kind of deal with those issues. Well, obviously we're not going to make it if he's willing to, if he's obviously not willing to even try. Yeah, so I eventually kind of, it was a few months or really, it was a few years of us not being intimate, which is- A few years? Wait, of not? You mean not once in a few years? Well, hold on. You said you guys were together for three years. Yeah. What do you mean?

What? He... Hold on. So how does that look like? Oh, I'm sorry. I guess that's personal. So he had a slight addiction. Oh. And so... And wouldn't go to therapy even though he had an addiction to the goon? Yes. The prime goon? Yep.

So eventually... So literally years of not being together as a couple? Yeah. So kind of after begging for things to change for, you know, months, years. Well, what did that look like? How was the communication on this? Not great. The reason all this matters, by the way, is because apparently, according to you, you started this off and I'm asking what's going on. You're saying you got by the situation ending. So, yeah. Yeah. So...

I think the communication was not great because he's a very like avoidant person. I think our like attachment styles are different. So I have a very like anxious attachment style where I need a lot of attention and kind of I need reassurance in a relationship. Yeah. And he's very like anxious avoidant where he doesn't want to have conversations. He doesn't want to talk about things. If we would have an argument, it would be kind of like

I was talking the whole time and he was just listening and I would give him the opportunity to speak up or if he needed, you know, an hour to kind of get his thoughts together, I would come back and be like, hey, you know, do you want to continue this conversation and give me your opinion? But he would never give that to me. It was always just me talking at him and him just never really responding. I think when I broke up with him, he probably said a total of like

20 words to me in the whole entire breakup conversation. Okay, but you are the one that pulled the trigger. Yes, I'm the one who decided to end things. Okay, even though you knew it would completely impact your life like that so much. Yeah. Were you expecting it to move so quick? This is crazy. So we actually broke up in April of 2024 and we were living together until December of last year. So we were living in the same house for six months. What we decided was we were just going to

cohabitate and live together and just kind of deal with it until our lease ended, which looked like him sleeping on the couch for all those months. So you would just catch him in the goon? No, because he would do that in his office, in his own private room. Walk away? Yeah. So...

So then his boss wanted him to move to San Antonio because his job has a location here in Austin and in San Antonio. And his boss wanted him to be the store manager or whatever at the San Antonio store. But he was like, I'm not going to drive two hours every single day to go to work. And so his boss said that he would cover our house bills for

until either the rental company finds someone else to live there or until the lease ends in March. So we're at the point where the rental company hasn't found anyone yet. So we're still half chewing on a cough drop in between your words. Let's be real. If your private student loans have your eye on a third job at the local taco stand.

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I hear a crunch every like five seconds. It's gone now. Focus on your crunch.

Okay, so you're on your own now. You have this living situation, but you're seeing this whole pile started from there, which is a situation of which, of course, I sympathize with. And you couldn't make the relationship work out. Okay, that sucks. I get it. But this stems from that?

I think a lot of the like spending specifically in December kind of stems from that. And if I dig through this and I search that out right now, you're positioning yourself as the victim of life right now, which for many people is correct. And maybe for you it is. But is the paperwork that is in front of me going to confirm that?

I think a lot of it. Because if not, I'm going to be pissed. Because people who victimize themselves but are not, kind of disgusting. I don't necessarily think I'm the victim in this scenario. Okay, well, so far the whole story has been about

Well, I mean... The breakup. Wow. Which does suck again. And if that is the whole thing, then you have my sympathy full on. I've just seen so many people try to use this to try to get out of things. I don't necessarily think I'm the victim here. I think that it's just... It was an unfortunate timing that I had to move out quickly. You straight down me six months ago. Okay, so that... So it ended back then. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How's dating going? So I... I...

I decided to come here because I saw you on Hinge six months ago. Are you f***ing kidding? Who's that? No, no, no. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I did see you on Hinge six months ago, but that's not why I decided to come here. Uh-huh. How was my profile? I mean, I swiped right. RIP. Yeah. I can't remember. It was a long time ago. Uh-oh. But so I feel like with the income that I make...

I'm almost as red as you. I'm embarrassed. Hey, okay. I'm sorry. Listen, I do get a little red. I like to get a little red when I'm nervous. I know, you're nervous. I am nervous. You just embarrassed me. I'm sorry. So... What do you think your finances are today? Zero to ten, zero being the absolute worst, ten being the absolute best. I think I'm at a one. Okay. Well, self-assess pretty reasonable for what it's worth. Obviously, every spending category we just had you lay out. That was all bull. Yeah.

Yeah. We thought was less. So download the Simpler Budget app. This guy, this tasty mug right here. Download that app. Okay. And actually connect your accounts. You get the premium version for free with all the education, the connection to the apps and all that stuff. I actually did download it. Good. Well, now you get it for free forever because you're a guest. Nice. If you guys want your Hammer Financial Score, that is free. A link in the description below. And if you want to be on the show, and come on. I like to ask guests sometimes just because there's...

weird people online that's i don't know whatever um uh how are you fully aware that i'm gonna meme on you yes there's gonna be a silly little thumbnail yes i'm gonna beat you up a little yep okay i'm aware and are you a real person or a paid actor i'm real and i don't know why i have to even do this but there's some weirdos out there so the internet's crazy so if you want to come on the show

Come down to Austin. We'll let you fully aware of what you're getting into and we'll have a good time. Go to calebhammer.com slash apply. All right, we got some debt. Yes. What is this? What am I looking at? I don't even know what the brand here. What the fuck is this? Tell me what debt you have. You need to look closer than an article. Oh, this is like a uplift thing.

This is an upstart loan. For what? What are you doing? So I took that out. It's a 26.93% interest. Yes. Upstart? Yes, I'm pretty sure that's... I have two upstart and I have one uplift. That's one of the upstart ones. Okay. Upstart one then. We are at $2,976.93 with a minimum monthly payment of... No, no, no. Wait, no, no, no. That is not the balance. Hold on. Where's the current balance? Because... Current balance, I think... No, no, no.

2076 at the top. Ah, $2,076 with a minimum monthly... It's 109. Payment of 109. 109, okay. We need you...

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Get this out. What is this for? I took that out when my ex-fiance and I were moving from an apartment to a house. What was your ex's work situation? You couldn't afford to move? Um,

For what? What was your guys' life looking like? If you couldn't afford it, you couldn't afford to move. I'm not going to judge that, but that's a different situation. What did your life look like? So we were in an apartment and they were going to raise our rent from $1,300 to $1,800. And so we decided to just get a house for that same amount of rent, basically. Sure. What did you guys' life look like? I was making...

less money than I am now. What were you making? Oh my gosh. I was making probably around $2,800. And what did he make? Best guess. Probably like $40,000 a year.

Okay. Or something around that. So what... Our financial situation, were you guys living on the edge? What were we doing? You didn't have enough money, so you completely financed the move? What was the move? Why didn't you just pack up stuff? Where was the move to? Same town? We moved from Austin to Leander. Okay. Why didn't you pack up a U-Haul? So... What is this? Was this Movers? It's more expensive than any of the moves I've ever done. We paid for Movers. Why? In what world could you guys get Movers if you were living on the edge of existence? I can't...

I'm not very strong and we have a lot of work out. And guess what? Neither am I. I'm a little, just look at me. But guess what? And I've moved, help my friends move. That's what we do. Well, you guys have friends. He, so we actually, yeah. So he moved from Ohio to here. Oh guys, people in Ohio can't lift up boxes. To move in with me. So he didn't have any, he doesn't have any friends here. Um, and so there was no one like all my friends are,

You guys can still move yourself. And I'm okay with movers if you can afford it. But you had to borrow movers at a 26% interest loan. That's obviously the problem that I'm making here. That is what I am digging into. I'm not digging into the fact that you took movers. That is not it. You borrowed movers at 26% interest while living on the edge. We couldn't afford to move. I think you could have with a U-Haul and movement.

That's probably true. And guess what? If you can't pick up boxes, maybe that's telling you something about your health unless you have something clinically diagnosed. Well, it's not so much the boxes. It's like the 500-pound dresser that I have. Yeah, that part's hard. I can't really, like... And we lived on, like, a second-floor apartment, so I can't, like... Yeah, that part gets hard. Maybe in the end you get a couple... Maybe you get a couple laborers or something. You know, just get some...

like an app like Thumbtack or something just to move down into the truck, but not the whole moving process because it's so expensive. And they have hour minimums and their gas bills are crazy. There's so many alternatives here. And listen, again, I am not against it. You borrowed it at 26% interest. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. You borrowed $3,588. The finance charge on it is $2,976.93. Total payments...

$6,564 on $3,588 that you borrowed. So that's what you paid for your move. A move with someone that you're not with anymore in a place you don't live in. You are paying $109 a month for that to pay a total of almost $7,000 to borrow $3,500 for a move that is done with someone you don't live with in a place you don't live.

Yes. Uh-huh. So that's what happens when we just defer our entire life and every kind of purchase. Yeah, this is the first...

kind of loan like this that I have ever taken out. If this was the first, so this just started just a train wreck of a life and you guys weren't even separated. I thought you said this all started when you guys separated. What are you talking about? You guys were completely together here. Were you fiances at the time? No, we were just dating. We didn't even get to fiance status and we're taking out a fucking like moving payday loan. Come on. Yeah. I, um,

That's a big one. And I think I didn't realize how much I would actually end up paying at the end of it. Like all said and done after it's completely paid off. I don't know that it just... Whenever I took out the loan... The statement right here. Yeah. You just got from me. You could have looked at it at any time. I mean, I did look at it whenever I printed it out. But this one's on auto pay. So I just like kind of...

Let it take out. 26% interest. I don't pay $900 going out to eat, and yet we could make nine of these payments on this card? What the f- Aren't you trying to move on? I mean, this is kind of a tax-to-pass relationship anyway. Like-

Are you even moving on? The question goes financially, you're not. In fact, you're getting in a worse position. There are a lot of other things that are still attached financially, too, that is like. With him? Yeah, like we're on the same car insurance. I have his Apple Watch on my Verizon bill. When did you guys break up again? Sorry, my memory's bad. In April. Okay. How are you still on car insurance together? Stop smacking your lips. Sorry.

It's okay. I'm just, it's loud. People are listening to you. Me. This is crazy. Oh, plus the finance fee to kick it off for $312. I think that was included in, like, I think they gave me. Gave you. It got added onto the debt. Yeah.

Like, I think they just took that out. What, you thought you paid for that out of the pocket at the moment? You thought that's what I was talking about? No, no, no. I mean, they gave me the money after they took out that fee. Well, yeah, because the principal amount became $3,900 because of the money of the $312. Okay, I see. Wait, what did you think happened?

That they when they paid out to my bank account, they gave me the money that I had taken the loan out for. But they subtracted that. No. Three hundred and twelve dollar fee. No. Oh, no. It was added to your principal. Honestly, that was so long ago. I don't remember.

Yet we still have it even at 26% interest. Listen, it's not like the income you make isn't like horrendous, but it's also not like woo woo for Austin. You're kind of you're in a fine area. You're in a fine area. But if you dig yourself too whole too far into a hole, you're not given the flexibility in your situation. Yeah. You make a fine income of the area, but you don't have the wiggle room to fuck so dramatically. And you did this years ago and the cup got worse. Yep. Yep.

Okay. Well, this isn't a document. This is just printed off things saying you owe to your fucking mom for expenses. No expenses again. Extra.

draw on top of what you already did or you couldn't you didn't have enough for you through your borrowing that was this an other move are we borrowing for every move that's ever been moved in the history of the world do you borrow when you move from your apartment to your car to work every day what are you borrowing what move are you going for you move for every movement every step you take you borrow that was um from 2021 and yeah oh the past one you're saying because you're pointing over this one is from uh whenever i just moved in december

Last month! Last month! Last month! Yes. So we did not learn our lesson in two years, so you're on a repeated pattern. You're on a repeated f***ing pattern. So whenever I was applying for apartments, I was having a hard time because I had a $750 collection from the old apartment that we used to live at.

The one we borrowed to move from, yes. Oh, psych! I had to pay that. Oh, there is not a thing you do in the world of living that you did not borrow for or just...

up. I am learning. I am learning. It's happening. The learning's been happening. So I had to pay that before they would accept me before they would accept my application. Fair enough. I paid that. And then whenever I moved in, because I had that past collection on my record, they charged me like an extra deposit to move in.

So whenever I moved into the apartment, because it was on my record and they were like, it's one of those things where if you move into an apartment, normally the deposit is like $500 or something. But because I had that past $750 on my record,

Yeah. They charged me $1,500 for a deposit. Oh, so this wasn't even the expenses of moving. This was just you putting a deposit down? Into the apartment, yes. You borrowed from your mom for a deposit? No, no, no, no, no. I paid that.

And then I also had to pay $1,200 the rent because I moved in past the 20th of the month. So whenever I moved in, I owed like $2,700 to the new apartment. Something tells me we didn't have an emergency fund. That is correct. So I didn't have enough to move. And

And I, again, what did you use movers? Yes. Okay. I don't think you understand moving. You're allowed to put in effort. I know you like free things and I'm giving some things away for free right now. And let me show you how to get it. First, I'm giving you a limited edition financial audit Tumblr plus a

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Is this just me? Can you guys let me know in the comments, is this just me? Like, every, like, I used movers last time. But every f***ing move with me and my friends, we all just pick up s*** and move. Like, we pick up stuff. Do people not pick things up anymore? And I get that little, I get like a big dresser. I get that. And if you don't have an established friend group that can help you, I do get that part. And maybe I'd get some people off Thumbtack or something. But, like...

My goodness. So I got movers because I didn't. If you have to borrow from your mom, I don't think we're getting movers. I wanted to make sure I got someone who had insurance. I wasn't sure. But if you moved it yourself, your insurance would be you not f***ing up. Well, yeah. But that's why I wanted someone else to move it because I don't want to break my stuff. And I don't want my friends to break my stuff. You didn't want to put. You have friends. Yeah, but I mean. They're incapable of moving as well.

I moved two days before Christmas, so... Friends wouldn't help you? Probably not. Doesn't sound like good friends. I mean, one of them was out of town and then the other one... Out of town makes sense, but...

I moved to the third floor and I have like the heavy furniture and then I everyone moves from the third floor that I know because who wants to live on the bottom floor where there's noise above you and then I own like this is what happens you're making an excuse for something that I feel like at least everyone in my life goes through and guess what we move each other I'm so confused you guys just seem so lazy I mean with the way you're eating and the way you're living I'm not surprised I just don't think that I can carry all that stuff up three flights of stairs

so it's gonna take like 30 trips welcome to what the rest of us have done i own like 800 books so congratulations i'm glad you're well read i couldn't um you get to take them to your next place down the stairs i couldn't bring those boxes up so i needed help you would use but i do not know how this works do you not know the next step what's the next step in that

What's the next step in that? Help me here. What's the next step? In what? You couldn't take the boxes of the books. What's the next step in there? Yeah, so I hired movers. No, no, no. What would be the next step to avoid movers?

What would it be? I guess carry it myself. Well, you said you couldn't. Yeah, I can't. So what's the next step? Hire someone else. Oh my goodness. You go from I can't do something to immediately hire someone when I have no money. Are you kidding me? Is there no problem solving techniques that you are capable of in life? What would be next? Use it. Friends. Oh, we're getting closer. What would be out of the solution? Because your friends weren't there. It was Christmas. Another question. Come on.

Oh, big, big, big thinking we're doing. Big thinking. Oh my goodness. You can get there. I believe I can't. Oh, go, go, go further. I want you to just put in a little bit of effort, a little bit of effort. Pretend like you actually did something that required effort in this world. Huh? You mentioned the thumb. No, no, no, no, no. We talked about not hiring people for this. Come on, come on. Don't move. I don't know. How have you survived? Um, maybe if you can't move the box cause it's too heavy. Take half the box and then

two trips what yeah how the f**k did you not just get there on your own i'm sorry i am learning throughout this and it's okay we lived in a privileged position in this country where we just get to relax but guess what you're allowed to put in a little bit of work and manual effort once a year i promise you won't die in fact it actually might be good for you

This looks like another upstart if I'm not. Well, hold on. Okay, so you owe $1,500 to your mom to pay for the movers because you couldn't take out half books and put them in a different box. Separate the items. Do you pay her a minimum monthly? Where are we with this? She told me to start paying her in February. Just whenever I can. Paying what? Just whatever. No number? No, we didn't really go over a number. She just kind of said, you know.

Send a few hundred. A few hundred? Like 200. 200? A month or so. Is what she suggested? It was, we didn't really get a concrete number. We were just kind of like talking about. Oh, what did you feel? What vibes did you get? A little vibe of numberage. 200 a month is good. Okay, let's put that on. 200. So you think she would expect that? You think if you gave 50, she'd be like, oh, what the f***? No. I think because we didn't talk about a specific number, she. Why have you not talked about it?

Because I haven't gotten paid in February yet. Well, what? I'm talking about. What the? How the f*** is that required to have a conversation? Well, because she told me to start paying her in February. So I figured whenever I get paid. And when you talked about the conversation of when to start paying. Yeah. I'm asking why you guys didn't come to a number.

You knew your income, whether or not the do you only know your income based on what hits that last week? Like, you don't know your income right now until you see your paycheck for this next paycheck. No, I do. It's the same. Then what the why does it matter to come up with the number when I get paid in February if it's the same damn income? I'm like, the logic here is broken beyond. I guess we just didn't talk about it. So I'm asking why, though.

I think because she just wants me to be able to pay her back whenever I can within my means. How often has she supported you financially throughout these 27 years? Well, okay. Obviously, before 18 makes sense, but go on. It's not a lot. Normally, the only time I...

have usually asked for money is like if i can't afford to get like a medication or something um like if my insulin is really expensive at the beginning of the year i are you on ozempic no insulin are you on ozempic no i'm not okay how much is insulin so at the beginning of the year it's pretty expensive because it's i have a high deductible so probably 1200 but if we get ourselves to a healthier weight you won't have to pay for insulin unless are you type one true i'm

- I'm type two, but I kind of treat it the same as type one. So like whenever I eat, I take insulin. - Why? When you can get rid of type two? - So I have a follow up appointment with my endocrinologist and I'm pretty sure I've had diabetes since I was a teenager.

And so I want to get a blood test done to see if I'm actually type two because. Oh, this has not been confirmed. So they have told me that I'm type two, but I think it's like, oh, you're overweight. So you're naturally just type two kind of thing. Yeah, that's how it works. And so there are type one diabetics who are overweight. And so. Yes. So they didn't test for type one. No, no, no. I've never been tested for type one.

It's like a specific blood test that you have to ask for. Yeah, do it. Do it. If you're type two, though, I mean, if this is easier to easier being said, here's the fact. You're obese. I'm obese. We're obese pals. High five. Woo woo woo. I'm lucky I don't have diabetes. But, you know, the thing is, it is a bit more in our control than many other things in life. Yeah. I mean, that is a brutally expensive way, like three hundred and fifteen pounds. So it's like.

You're telling me that number without me knowing how much you weigh now. I weigh like 215. Okay, then good job. But all I'm saying is like, if we can't afford insulin, and I get it, the insulin situation sometimes can be f***ed. Yeah. If we're having to borrow from our mom, though, maybe we take...

Control the one thing we can. Yeah. In that situation. If you're type one, less control. Right? So I've been doing something lately to kind of... Someone's going to say out there that I'm fat shaming when we're literally just talking about basic fucking science. Well, I'm fat, so it's whatever. And me too. I've been doing something lately, though, that I'm hoping will help. And I'm using my HSA that I put in every month to pay for my therapy. You put into HSA, which I get for tax advantage...

That makes sense. But again, even with the tax advantages you're getting, is it really competing against like a, again, this new upstart loan is at $35.68.

I mean, maybe not, but because I have these medical expenses, I figure it's probably better to do that because... I guess if the money is going to go to it anyway, I guess. I've been putting my therapy and it goes towards my monthly deductible or my deductible. It goes towards my deductible. And so I've been able to, because I go to therapy every week, kind of build up that deductible. So when I need to get the insulin, it won't cost me...

all at once because I'll have met the deductible. How many do you have to get the insulin? I have to get it once a month, but I hit my deductible last year. So I was able to get kind of a stockpile. So I have enough to last me. So how have you lost this? How long did you lose this weight and how'd you do it? So actually I lost it because I had undiagnosed diabetes for so long that really rapid weight loss is a symptom of diabetes and

And so I probably lost about 75 of it. I could use a little bit of diabetes right now. I probably lost like 75 of it in a two and a half, three month time span. Jesus.

And so this is why I also have an inkling that I might be type one, because that is like a symptom of type one that you lose weight really, really rapidly. OK, so get the test. Yeah, we'll go from there. But if it is a little bit more in your control, that is something that we're brutally struggling to take care of. Yeah. You know, maybe we take care of the one thing we Hawaii starts with the music we play on our islands playing the moment you step on the plane.

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T-E-C-O-V-A-S dot com slash hammer. Tecovas.com slash hammer. This upstart, though, is at $1,000.

$225.08. No, sorry. That's the financial chart. I keep looking at the wrong thing in these upsets. They look so weird. Okay. This upstart is a $1,093 minimum monthly payment of 3818 because they want you to pay this 35.68% interest forever. Of course, again, you took out $1,062, but the finance chart on it was $1,225. So if the

You took out your payment total of $2,287. What is a $138 finance fee at the beginning? What is this for? So the last one is moving. If you tell me this is moving again, I'm going to... No, you're going to be more mad actually. Kill me now. Go on. So I took that out when my ex and I went on a vacation.

attached to something we did with our ex-fiancee. Fiancee, not even a f***ing boyfriend. Fiancee. And this is attached to them, a whole big part of their f***ing entire life that we are still paying. Did he never pay for things? I'm so confused. Why is this all on you? Vacation, where'd you go? What the f***? You've

35% interest for a vacation? Oh, there's so many things attached to this. For fuck's sake, where'd you guys go for 35%? It was, um, so I actually borrowed that for spending money, but we went on a cruise to Mexico. I already paid for the cruise. And yet you haven't paid for the spending yet. No. And so What was this? It was like three weeks before we broke up. No fucking... Yeah. You're fucking kidding me.

I wish I was kidding. That is insane. This situation that is attached to him in the past three weeks before you broke up. Okay. Yeah. So I used my tax refund to pay for the cruise. Oh, my. Okay. Instead of paying off our last moving expense that we were paying a minimum monthly cruise. You're still paying off the spending. You broke up three years ago.

So this was building by then. If you broke up three weeks after with your fiance. So I think I think going on this vacation was kind of like a last resort. Like if we're taken out of if we're taken out of real life and all of the, you know, things that go on in a normal day to day and we're on vacation and we're spending time together, maybe this will fix it.

The intimacy issue. Intimacy? I don't think dude wants to get off the goon and wants to because he sees a Mexican. I don't know. I mean, like we're in a we're in a cruise room where, you know, it's I thought. The ocean? Maybe. It didn't work, though. So. Well, because that was a bad plan. Yeah. In hindsight, that was a bad plan. You literally owe more on it right now than you financed it.

Like, the amount you took out is less than you owe on it now. This is fucking crazy, dude. Yes. I mean, the payment term is 59 months. It's a 60-month loan for spending money with our ex-fiancé that we broke up three weeks

Three weeks after. At the time, I thought it would fix my relationship. I'm so confused. So far, we've, again, at the beginning, you talked about breaking up and getting, like, the house situation is kind of what started the situation. We've looked at three debts. Two out of the three happened before you broke up.

So I don't know what the fuck we were on about. That's what I was worried about and called out at the beginning. I think we both together were not like neither of us are good financially at managing our money. And so I think we kind of fed off of each other in that way. And so now there's a different reason. Okay. Well, I mean, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This one. This one's the one uplift. Yeah.

That one has a story as well. Oh, God. If it's trying to f*** or if it's trying to move, like, at that point... Okay. You just get into debt for the most literally insignificant things, except for... I get the... Well, actually, no. Again, you could have f***ing half-packed... You could have stacked the books differently. Weightless. All this debt so far, it's not even like f***ing...

We haven't even looked at a credit card. Usually I tell people to use the Fizz card because it's a debit card that builds credit because I know you're always going to say, but credit. So I usually like to say, but we haven't looked at that. You're just building out. I see a credit card coming. So I guess. Yeah, I think that's the last one. I guess we will do that. Okay. So Uplift. Uplift, we are looking at. Let me see if I can actually read this one. Correct. This one's also a 35.94% interest. I think that one has around 300 or so left.

$357.20 with a minimum monthly payment of $125.00. $124.51. So what is going on here? So in June...

of 2024 I went on a work trip to Estonia and that's where my company is based out of. Estonia? Hold on. Wait. Is that a Balkan? Is that one of the Balkans? I think so, yeah. It's like right down below Finland.

Yes. So that was all paid for by the company. The whole trip flights. Oh, all that is completely paid. Oh, OK. So I'm OK. I went there and I I matched with someone on Tinder while I was there. And so I

Good thing we did not. I was there for two weeks. Good thing I did not swipe right. Let me just. And. There for two weeks for work or the Tinder swipe? For a work, for the work trip. Oh, okay. I was there for two weeks and I matched with him about three or four days into the trip and.

And so the rest of the time when I wasn't working, we were like spending time together, going to like, he was showing me stuff around Estonia and whatever. It's like, oh, Carly, I like the way you look American. Not quite, but really close. So...

I left and we kept talking and I decided I was going to go see him in September. No, fuck off. This last September, obviously, it would have been. Yes. Unless you were cheating, which you weren't, so okay. And so I got that from United. To go see your fucking little Scandinavian, overly white, never had a tan day in his life? Yep. Okay. Okay.

So that's from the United... I want to see a picture of this. You want to see a picture of him? I want to see a picture of this. Okay. Because apparently he's worth 35.94% interest. Well, he's not because I actually didn't go.

You borrowed this into the fucking go? So now I have like an $1,000 United credit now. But I canceled the trip and they... Why'd you cancel? Well, because... If you borrowed... You were so close. Why'd you... Well, why'd you... Did you guys break up? Yeah, we broke up. We just... Wait, you guys were together technically? Yeah. Why'd you break up with this one? Well, because we kind of realized that the long distance thing wasn't going to work. I mean, long distance... Yeah, Estonia is not close. Yeah, long distance and maybe the same country...

But I don't know. The time difference was really hard and like he didn't really have a job. So I wasn't really interested in that. I know the Europeans love it when we shove our insulin and just get some going. He did have a like a belly thing. Yeah. Just got up in those roles. He liked the belly, I guess. It's a little sweaty. OK. I have a picture. Would you like to see? Yeah. OK. Oh, yeah.

No, he's a little less neo-Nazi. Yeah, he's not. More like I'm going to spread communism to your country forcefully. Be careful. He's swiping. It doesn't turn into like fucking YouTube. I don't know. Astoning each other. I don't know. I don't know. So don't swipe that much. Okay, I'm not. Sorry. It's a natural thing to swipe with it. Well, I would not want to see that. Okay. Sure. The 35.94% man. Yeah, so... For him, I guess. So we broke up. So I canceled my trip and...

And now I have the United credit, but I need to use it before like July or something. Girl, stop swiping on people and making bad choices. Yeah.

I do make bad choices. Did you go... How many McDoubles did you eat after I swiped left on you? At least two, probably. See? That's what I'm saying. Yeah. It can't... I prefer chicken nuggets, but, you know. Dude, the nugs are so... I don't really... I'm not really a fan of the mustard on the McDoubles, so I kind of just... You can't say no mustard? I can, but... I don't know. Sometimes I want them to put mayonnaise on it, and they put way too much mayonnaise on things at McDonald's, so... Oh, my gosh. Look at us rubbing our rolls together. Okay. Okay.

uh now that's yes yes okay 21 871 dollars when'd you go to school um so i went oh from put them your past due yes that is true wait how many no no no your minimum payment is 144 49 but you owe 565 you're past due 420 what the fuck is happening here how do you possibly how

you possibly get to go the out to eat or go to Estonia bang a white Estonian guy I don't even know how to make fun of them why do you get to do that why do you get student loans yeah that one that one is causing me a little anxiety yeah that was not an answer to my question who the fuck do you think you are going to McD's instead of paying on your student loans it is less now

I paid like $250 on it. So now it's a little... Well, that's not what you owed! You spent $800! Yes. How can you be okay with yourself going through that drive-thru when you owe this bill? And it is f***ing holding you back in life. You want independence. You want to move away from this past relationship. You want to separate yourself from the debts that you got when you got him. You want to take control. Yet you are incapable of because you can't

spending money on fast food. In what world does that take priority? It doesn't. But it does to you. And I think the student loans feel worse because I didn't even finish school. So they feel like they were all for nothing, really. 40% of people who borrow student loans don't.

It's a statistic. It's a statistic. Yeah. It's a one. That's why I like I like I always talk about course careers. They're my boys. We'll gift you a course career certification. Our audience loves them. Lots of people have used them. But just even if it's not your full career, just to get in and see if you're interested in a subject like a few hundred dollar investment is so much better than forty four thousand or twenty one thousand dollars. I dropped out of school student loans as well.

Like, I get it. But the thing is, I at least pay my damn minimum monthly payments very clearly. But I don't put it over my student loans. Yeah. I think I was just...

lazy and stressed with moving lazy and stressed with moving did you just say with moving yeah did you just tell me you were lazy and stressed yeah moving i was are you bringing this to moving again we all move i've moved every literal year except for one since i've been 18 i'm almost a dead 30 well i had like a month to figure everything out so i was like it felt like that's

my entire life listen listen and the guardians can tell me if i'm wrong here maybe you are that is the more normal situation maybe i've just been a little more weird with my moving and i'm wrong but that just sounds normal to me payments when i move when i had no money to when i have money damn payments even if i've seen

Then again, you did have to borrow from mom. $1,500. Why? Well, $900 a month on fucking good old tea. $400 a month on miscellaneous bullshit. So no shit. No, no fucking shit. We're borrowing money from mama. Yes. Yeah. So I am. What? So my parents have had a 529 account for me, but. What's how much in it?

26 or so. 26,000? Yes. So this was after the 26,000. So you spent like 50,000? No. So they used that to buy me a new car.

Oh, okay. Which they can, but even still $26,000. Does that all have to go to the new car? No, maybe like seven or eight, nine of it. When did they have to get the new car? When was this? When was this? December 2021. Wait, when were you in school? You're 27. Yeah. So why was the 529 not being used while you're in school? When did you go to school? 18? Yeah. Well, why was the 529 still sitting there? I'm so confused. They used it for a few semesters and then...

I guess I just didn't really talk to them about the borrowing and the student loans. And so then I decided to drop out and not go anymore. What were you going to school for? Well, I changed my major so many damn times. Most of the time, what were you going to school for? The last thing I was doing was paralegal studies. Why'd you drop out? Because I just couldn't do school and work at the same time.

So I just stopped going. What do you mean you couldn't? Well. You're incapable of doing anything that everyone else does. I just want to make sure you're aware of that. According to you, you are incapable of doing anything that anyone else does. Here, let's get some general statistics. Huh? Let's get a little general statistics.

Well, I tried for a long time to work and go to school full-time at the same time, and that didn't work. And then whenever I started working, and as the years have gone on, I've made more money each year, and so I figured...

I'm not really interested in paralegal studies anymore. Anymore? So how often did you fall on and off these memberships? By the way, 74% of people enrolled in 2020 were working at least a part-time job. Full-time students working at least a part-time job on the side. So I can't.

It's like you can't half pack a box. Well, I think I tried for so many years and I just realized school wasn't for me. Well, that part's okay. But let's be honest. That's not the excuse to use. I think you were being honest. You thought you couldn't. You are lazy. You are lazy in every aspect of life is what we are learning. That might just be a part of your personality. I don't want to say that's okay. Uh...

I think the amount of time that I was putting towards school just at the end of it wasn't really worth it for me if I wasn't going to finish and I didn't want to keep borrowing and I didn't want to, you know, I kind of decided to choose to focus on working and, you know, growing my career and doing stuff like that. Which I get that part. That part's fine. Okay. So you have the car. Do you have the car? Yeah, I have the car.

Did they pay for it in cash? Yes. How much? It was, I mean, it used all of it, all of the 529s.

I'm getting a value of $16,000 now. Yeah, it was back when the... How's it doing? It's good. It was back when the used car market was really bad. Yeah. So... It's still not great, but it is a lot better, even though I honestly don't think it's ever going to be what it was again. Yeah, it's great. I keep up with the maintenance and everything, and it's... How many miles we got?

I think it's at like $47,000 or $48,000. And what was the car? It's a Mazda 3. 2021 Mazda 3. Mazda 3. So, yeah, it's in great condition. It runs great. The mom is giving you $1,500. $1,500.

They paid for the car for you. What else? What else do they do for you? What else have they done for you? Whenever we decided to get married, my fiance and I, um, my mom decided to take money out of her retirement to pay for our wedding. Guys, I just wanted to say an extra thank you for making simpler budget and incredible

We'll be right back.

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bonus I will give you a signed version of my budget friendly cookbook for free when you sign up for simpler budget premium annual your mom took money out of her fucking retirement how much um so to get real business results today you need professional looking content meet adobe express

It's the easy way to make social posts, flyers, presentations, and more. Start fast with Adobe quality templates and assets. Make edits in one click. Stay consistent with brand kits and collaborate easily with colleagues. Your teams can finally create with AI that's safe for business. Try Adobe Express, the quick and easy app to create on-brand content. Visit adobe.com slash express. The total... Why'd you even allow her to? I wouldn't have even accepted that. Well...

I mean, I figured she was offering, and so she... She was offering, but do you know how... The way she phrased it... How old is she?

She's 64. Okay, so she can take it out penalty free at least. What's her retirement look like-ish? Best to your knowledge. I mean, I don't know the exact number. Best to your knowledge. Really good. She worked for Exxon Mobil for like 35 years. So her choice was she put to retirement. It's probably in the millions. Okay, so how much did she take out? Really? Yeah. Okay. So she took out... The way she phrased it was that...

I have enough and I want to celebrate with you and I want to do this for you. Oh, okay. Well, that's different. Okay. So she took out $8,000 total. And the wedding was... The venue was non-refundable. So I think she paid in total $7,000. That was... You couldn't cancel. You couldn't change the date. You couldn't change the names on the reservation or like the venue. And so...

We had to pay. She paid $7,000 because even though it was canceled. You guys were close. Did you spend money on wedding rings and the dress and rooms where? I actually bought my dress. And it was like $600. So I bought that.

Everything with this fucking relationship, man. It's on my mom's now. I told her to put it on Facebook Marketplace. What? It's your mom's now? No, it's at my mom's. Like, it just... And you're having her sell it? I told her if she wants to, she can, but... Okay. I mean, what am I going to do with it? Sell it? Well, yeah, but...

You're the one that doesn't have money. You just borrowed from her. Yeah, but it's like... I guess you could sell it and put it towards your dad. I'm just not sure how... I don't know. I got it tailored, so I don't know if it... Whatever. No, we didn't spend money on the rings because my ring... Good, thank you. ...from my stepmom, my dad kind of passed it on to me, so it is my ring. And then she... I think she... When I had the conversation with her that we were going to not get married, I think she was...

kind of okay with it because she's been married like four times. Really? Yeah, she just got married to her new husband in September. Oh, is she pre-nup'd? I don't know. Okay, well, we're sitting at about 3-5% interest on these loans, so I'm okay with that minimum monthly payment until it's paid off, but you actually have to pay the f***ing minimum monthly payment. Yes. I was planning to get cut off in February. Why not f***ing before? The reason I'm okay with holding the 5% again because it's like

I think new users who sign up for the investing app, I use MooMoo. It's like they get like 8.5% on their money for like six months and then it's like 6% or something. I don't know. But it's a lot of money and that beats your student loan. So that's why I'm okay with minimum monthly payment. We can use the money for our investments. Why am I seeing red on this? Usually if I'm seeing red on a document, that means it's bad. Okay, what am I looking at? Capital One. Don't even spoil it for me.

I'm about to get just f***ing sneaked up on by this. Okay, what's going on here? Oh, fees, $40. Hmm, that's curious. Oh, wait, I don't see a single dollar going towards it. Oh, wait, it's a budget limit. A thousand credit limit. We owe one or $1,593.22. Minimum monthly payment, $141. What is that f***ing normally? What is it normally? How many months are you behind on this? How many months? How many months are you behind on this? I think...

I think maybe two because the monthly payment is like 51. You don't not make money. You don't not make money. Yeah. I understand you got in a little predicament with the collections in the past, which you should have taken care of and that would have prevented you from f***ing yourself over when you got into this new place. So your fault, your problem, actually dealing with the consequences of your own actions. Who would have thought? But either way, even with that, you make money where you could have made like a $50 damn f***ing payment on this. Yeah. I...

So I'm going to say it's like a normally like a $40 payment, right? It's $51. $51. Okay, sorry. Yeah, $51. Okay, but you have $141 right now because we're over the credit limit. Yes. We're not paying the bills. $35.55 of interest is accruing. And what are these possible fucking purchases? I think that's the one. Apple. And Apple. And Pastor Woody. Pull up your subscriptions. Let me see your phone. Nope. It's my own. Let me pull it up. I want to have a little, I want to have a little sneaky little peek. It's really not that exciting. Oh, no.

I'm having a little look, a little sneaky little look. There's only one that's active. And it's my iCloud storage. Well, yeah, but look at all the subscriptions you have signed up for. So, yeah. We had Twitch, Audible, Snapchat, Tinder, a channel membership to Valkyrie YouTube. Meet Curvy? I think that's a dating app. It's a thick dating app? Yeah.

Interesting. They got one for everything. Farmers only. That's where I'm going to find my three-toothed woman. That's not on there. No, I said that's what I'm going to use to find my three-toothed wife. Oh, three-toothed wife. Only three? Farmers only. Okay. Bumble. More bumble. Those are really old. Facetune. Come on. Those are really old.

kind of. Not really. The only active one that I have is... Like, literally, it was a couple months ago. My iCloud storage. But the FaceTune, come on, don't, like, you know. I'm trying to remember why I got that. Just not for the dating profiles because that'll, like... I don't think I use that. Don't!

ah you know what i'm talking about that word for when you look like different when you open mixology catfish hinge catfish thank you coffee makes bagels jesus for f**k's sake you downloaded it every day to now put the f**k is the coffee made bagel i don't know it wasn't very good what's different not anything i have hinge and bumble actually it wasn't that was probably the worst one it's linkedin trying to find a sugar daddy instead everland ebooks and audiobooks yeah those are easier to carry that's true

I did cancel the audiobooks because you can download those from Libby through the library. So I did cancel that. When Jake added up your subscriptions, total was $372.65. And to YouTube TV, $181.58. Is that cable? Oh.

Yeah. So I subscribed to the NFL Sunday ticket and I didn't realize you can't afford it. I didn't realize I couldn't cancel it. I have it too. And I love it. And it's great for everyone who wants it. Yeah. If they want to watch like the lions, cause I can't watch them down here. It's great. Guess what? You literally are borrowing from your mom. That was, I, I really, yeah, I regret that. Luckily my best friend's husband gave me half cause he used it.

Well, we're going to be getting fees every second in our life on this card. Okay, we got a freedom card. Freedom to fuck up our entire life, which you do have and you chose to take that freedom and you did. $1,949.86 with a minimum monthly payment of $105. Okay. I think...

Again, $40 fees and $46.34 of interest. What are we doing? What are we doing? Oh, you're at the credit limit. What? I think the interest, or sorry, I think the minimum, the normal monthly minimum is like $59 or $60. And then I had the, I think I had a late fee on that one. I think. The only thing that goes on that card is my DoorDash pack. It's max the...

How much you spend in door dash? How much you spend in door dash? How much you spend in door dash would be the answer you're going to give me. I actually added it all up. Okay. I went through every single purchase on there. What was your year in review for door dash? It was around $3,900. And we're trying to get off insulin. Okay.

But that's only, that is only the DoorDash pass. That's more than a month of your income going to fucking DoorDash. Yeah. I mean, sometimes it's buying lunch for work and then I get- No, you pack, you pack, pack. No, no, no, for like team events. Your team, you pack. But I get reimbursed.

Well, how much would you honestly say? So sometimes it's... No, up to $4,000. How much was that? Maybe $500. Uh-huh. Okay. It didn't save you. Stop. Yeah. Stop. It's f***ing crazy, dude. Got fees and interest. F***ing late fees and interest. This is such a mess. You cannot... I think I need to put things on... I think you need to cancel f***ing DoorDash. Probably. Probably.

Because then I think. So you said you're in therapy, right? Yes. Thanks. Every week. Is it expensive? It's $80 a session. So it's like. We can get you just like everyone in the audience and I use personally. We can get you three free sessions to sound her mind. But you're already with a therapist. I don't know if I want you to change your peers. Yeah, I really like her. I get it. Okay. It's very expensive though.

Okay. Really? I thought that was pretty cheap. I guess it depends on your insurance in terms of what your copay towards it is. Is she in network? She's in network. Yeah. I mean...

I don't know. It might change once I meet the deductible. My therapy is covered now, but last time I did therapy covered through an insurance I got through work because I'm assuming you're getting this through work. My copay was like 40 bucks. Well, I think once I hit the deductible. But I did take the top option. Because I started seeing her in December after I'd already hit my deductible and it was zero. So I think once I hit it. Another capital one? Yes, I have two capital ones. Jeez, for fuck's sake. Okay. That minimum is I think 25. Shh.

$293.35 with a $25 minimum monthly payment. I can read numbers sometimes. Yeah.

$57 of purchases. Thank goodness. That's the one that I put. Oh, it's maxed out. It's maxed out at your 300. Thank goodness the max is only 300 because you have no ability to not go to the max. You only go to the max. You are obsessed with going to the max. You see the max and you're like, I'm going to go there. Yep. $7.27 of interest accruing. $57.54 of purchases. You've purchased on every card so far. Why are we purchasing on f***ing cards that we cannot pay? Why are we purchasing on cards that are maxed out? Out. Out. Out.

Out. You owe your mom. Why are you purchasing on f***ing cards at a max? Out. That's when I have my Amazon subscribe and save things on.

That I just need to change the payment method. Okay, start a screen recording and let me see that Amazon account. Okay. Let me see how many dating apps are we going to see on there. Physical in-person dating apps. I don't think they sell those. Huh? I don't think they sell those there. Okay. I couldn't see it because this is insane. So some of these purchases. How do you think this takes to pay off? This $300 with only a minimum payment without doing purchases which you're incapable of. Just this. Maybe two and a half years. 15 months, but that's still insane.

So some of these. Amazon, Amazon. My ex still has my Amazon. Separate, lady. Yes. Separate. You've already gone on a date with a fucking tall Eastern European man that's going to conquer the Balkans for Putin again. Like. Separate. He has a very strong feeling about Russians from what I recall. Which one? Balkan man? Yeah, they usually do that. That's why they're a part of NATO.

Okay, you got books. You got you're wiping your ass with some toilet paper. Ultra, ultra plus ultra. Wow. Okay. And we got lots of gain really stocking up on the gain. We have diet indoor. Oh, adult cat food. Lots of yarn. Lots of more yarn. Oprah's book. Those are that's starting with my exes or Christmas presents for his family or whatever.

I didn't pay for those. He paid for those. Puzzle for adults. Puzzle for adults. Maybe we do need to go on more dates. We got some pens, plushy things, natural forks. Nutri-Chef? What's a Nutri-Chef? I don't know. I think that was another. Pants.

Really? You didn't have any shelves? Not once? You didn't have any shelves? You didn't have any bag? You didn't have any cookware? You did not have any crochet stuff with your endless crochet? Oh, more yarn. Wow, you go through yarn like that. I do, and I brought it. I brought it. I can show you. You brought your yarn? No, I brought a blanket I made with the yarn. Is this show and tell? Okay. Yeah, I'll show you. I'm back in kindergarten. Let's see. And it's really soft.

Okay, better be for the amount of money you spent on it. Okay, for really soft. Okay, let me give you my full candid. Full candid. I made it. Stop. It's the first blanket I ever made. I have blankets. This isn't what I would consider really soft. It's the softest yarn you can buy. Okay, then you need better yarn because why are there softer blankets? Well, I don't know. It's made of different material. It's not crocheted. Okay. Okay.

Can you really stay warm with all these holes? Yeah, it's really heavy. Yeah, it is pretty heavy. That part's cool. It's kind of like a weighted blanket. I need to sew those. It has like herpes. Yeah, I need to sew those in. Also, my cat sometimes. Oh, it's nice. How much did it like cost you in general? Well done. I'm sure that's taking time. It probably cost. Did you make that? That looks like you made that too. No, this is a Taylor Swift cardigan. Oh, that's why it looks like. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. Right. So this is the cutest one so far. But this costs probably 40 bucks in yarn. And then... I saw yarn purchases like crazy in there. Yeah. So I accidentally bought the wrong size. And one of these was the wrong size. I think it's cool. I think it's really cool. It's a cool hobby. I was... Keep going, I guess. Um...

The fact is, I just struggle with the purchase of it when we're literally borrowing from our mom in order to afford to survive and we're late on every payment and we're only max out cards. It's like priorities, right? Yeah. I think it's- Warning.

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Quest Nutrition. Big on protein, low on sugar, huge on flavor. It's basically cheating. Cool. I was memeing on you. I was memeing on that. I don't actually hate it. It's fine. Whatever. But it's just, you don't have a kid, do you? No, no, no. That's my niece. Oh, no. No, no. Well, that would just add a wild element to this conversation. Absolutely not. Okay. Also, Joanne's and Michael's was another $67.71. Yes. I did buy more yarn. Okay.

It's the priorities. I want to support that hobby. I'm good with that hobby. I think it's pretty cool. It's cool to actually produce something physical. I think that too. I think it's kind of cool. It's tangible. It's really cool. Produce something with your hands. You can't afford it right now. You can't. You really can't. Name this credit card at 30.24% interest. Yeah. You what? I did make my friend a Christmas gift and she's going to come watch my cat.

When I'm out of town. So she would have watched it, whether or not you got her a Christmas. I know, but you know, but, but she handcrafted me something. And so I wanted to, that's nice. That's nice. Sometimes we put off things for a little bit. If we can't afford to literally live. That's true. I, I, everyone. So I see comments where it's like, okay, cancel Spotify. Yeah. You can't survive. Yeah. You're literally not able to afford your existence. Yeah.

It's as simple as that. It really comes down to that base level where you are literally borrowing from your mom to survive. And you've done that all throughout life.

Come on. You've taken different handouts from them. And it's okay that they saved up for you. But what if you did have to pay for that car? What kind of situation would you be in now? You're maxed out on the credit cards. You're late on the credit cards. This is a disaster. It's when you put off those special things. Yeah, I think I would be, you know. Get the Spotify. Get the yarn. When you're not able to, when you're actually able to live. But you're not.

But you can't. You are not able to survive. And maybe this is harsh on me. I don't know. Me personally. I'm choosing you keeping a roof over your head over your arm.

I know, but I agree. And I think the one thing I'm never late on is rent because I feel like that's the most important. For now. Look how your lates are stacking. Yeah. Your lates are stacking. It is a for now equation with you. $1,273.34 on my best buy credit card with a $46 minimum monthly payment. Yikes, yikes. So that one. How long does this take to pay off?

Maybe six years? Eight years. Okay. So I don't spend on that. A year and 40 on that. I don't spend on that one ever.

Well, thank f***. But honestly, you're barely able to anyway. You could make like a $100 purchase and you'd be there. Interest is accruing constantly. It's 29.49%. Why are we in it in the first place? Like, what the f*** did you get? So I bought a TV. Sort of TV, but you can get so many cheap TVs these days. Yeah. What kind of TV were you getting? I bought it in like 2019. Even still, you could get affordable TVs in 2019. It's like a 75-inch Samsung or something. Oh!

Why aren't you getting like a fucking fire or whatever? Dude, in what world when you cannot survive are you getting a 75 inch Samsung OLED TV probably? No, it's not OLED. It's not. It's not. Like I wish it was, but it's not. Well, don't upgrade.

I won't until that one breaks. It's just the priorities, man. I'm not saying don't get it. Don't get it now. Yeah. You could have got a pretty good 4K TV for 500 bucks. It is really annoying to move. We have 60 to 70 inch 4K TVs all over here. I purchased them for like 400 bucks and they're good. Yeah, it's really annoying to like move places too because I'm scared it'll break. Again, something that everyone deals with. For f*** sake, stop. Well.

I'm just saying that I could have bought a smaller one and that would have been probably a better decision then. Yes, I agree. I have a checking account next. So it was very clear with these payments and everything that you're doing. And I'm already seeing every line on here being just the first page alone being marked as a purchase. You don't know what a debt is. You don't understand the implications of

Or the importance of investing. Go through all three of our classes, budgeting, debt, and investing. You get it for free. They get it for 15% off, but you get it for literally free. There have been guests that come on the Financial Audit Follow-Up channel. They've gone through the classes. They've turned their lives around. There have been those who get it for free so they don't go through it because they don't have that investment. Yeah.

So they don't go through it and they don't change their lives. 10,000 people out there have taken it and changed their lives. You can do that same. Take advantage of this literal opportunity like none other of yours right now. This could be your make or break. You have the opportunity. Go through that. Take advantage of the resources. Don't piss me off. I not. I've sent to this checking account. Yep. There's 5%.

purchases on this first page and all of them are highlighted as bullshit. $2 in our checking account. So I keep most of my money in my other checking account. I keep it in my other one. But it's

Your purchases, dude. So I tried to keep the money on there of the bills that come out on auto pay. And then I put the other money in my other checking account because it has like 3.93% or something. So I figured that's probably a better option than keeping it in that one that doesn't have any percent. But you had overdraft fees. So whatever percent you're getting, does that matter? Yep. So f*** you. It's as easy as that.

Yeah. Paramount for fucking Paramount? We're overdrafting for fucking Paramount? Taylor Swift shop. Oh, we got one of these. Okay. Here they are. Oh, good. A Patreon. PayPal. PayPal. I doubt it's even our Patreon, is it? We literally provide more content in our YouTube membership. But I am subscribed to it. Well, not Patreon because you don't have that. Yes, I do. Oh, I don't know. We just like YouTube more. I meant the YouTube.

And that's the conflicting part of it is you have done you're not able to survive. We want to offer for people who want to support the channel and watch all the extra content we produce. We have like so many shows in our membership. Yeah. And it's great but that's the moral dilemma man and you're f***ing killing me. You're borrowing from your damn mother f***ing mom. Cash app. Disney plus you have every subscription. Discord you have every f***ing subscription.

And there's your NFL bullshit. And Venmo overdraft. Overdraft. Yeah, luckily NFL doesn't come out anymore. Peacock. I should cancel that. Overdraft. I don't watch it. Amazon. Target. Better be groceries. Is it? Because you never know with Tarjay. I don't know how much. Especially with how white you are. Yeah. How much was it? 164. Oh, I think that was a Christmas gift. So we're going to overdraft for a Christmas gift. Well done, guys. We're doing so well.

The mall. Spotify. You can listen to ads. You can listen to ads if you're f***ing unable to pay rent. Well, move. Putting down money for it. If we're late on credit cards, you can listen to ads. If you think it's about Spotify, you're literally... It's not about Spotify. You can't pay your bills, so you're able to make a sacrifice. Amazon. Book of the month.

Just GPT what the book of the month is. You'll be fine. Google it. You'll be fine. Then we're not money. Klarna? We're klarning? What are we klarning? I didn't see a f***ing Klarna. I got new shoes, but I paid that off. Did you not have shoes? I didn't have like walking shoes and my endocrinologist told me that I should get some so I can like start walking and like getting physical activity. But I didn't have any like... All I have is like Converse and...

So I didn't have any like tennis shoes. Maybe we live different lives, but every shoes I've put on are walking shoes because I walk in them. Well, I came to my endocrinologist. I went to my endocrinologist and he said that I should get...

Like new balances so that I have like support. Oh, hello. New balances. Isn't that nice? Yeah. I can afford them though. They actually... That's the rule. They're very comfortable and my feet don't hurt whenever I walk a lot anymore because I did... Well, that's indicative of something else. No, because I was wearing... So I was wearing these like really like, I don't know, cheap shoes that were not meant for walking. I actually went on a date to like the Trail of Lights and I...

I didn't realize how much walking that consisted of. I mean, I knew the trail was going to be walking, but you have to walk like a mile and a half from the parking lot just to get to the trail of lights. No, the whole thing from parking back is like two miles. You couldn't do two miles? Well, it was like a mile and a half. I looked at my steps. Well, that's good. But in total, it was like five miles. I'm not fully against this, but you clarinet it. That's true. You're minimum with the payment and all your stuff and you're lucky. I was wearing those really bad shoes and so I went to my endocrinologist to

Just for a normal follow-up. Listen, if the doctor said it, I'm good with it. But again, you're clarning it. It's like the thing earlier. I don't even remember all this. This conversation has been long. Not opposed to you getting it. It's how you did it. Yeah. Amazon, golden chick. Now it's going to make walking harder. Yeah. The spicy tenders. Give spicy diarrhea. The jalapeno poppers. Gamblet. Hulu. You have every subscription. More Paramount. Amazon. Overdraft fees. $102.99.

And the first month of the year. No, that was December. Okay. And the last month of the year. So this is where I keep most of like my money. $754. Most of our money. Yeah. Like anything that's not. Starbucks. Michael's. Auto pay. Michael's. Isn't that shoes? That's not shoes. No, Michael's is a craft store. Craft stores. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I go to like the same, like two stores. Okay. Thai and sushi. Torn dash. Yeah. Yeah.

Borrowed from my mom to survive, but we're door dashing. Jersey Mike's, Jersey Mike's, Joanne's, Joanne's, Creative Reuse, Sushi and Thyme, went and got some BS from the gas station, door dashing Dairy Queen, New York Times.

Mexican restaurant, Michael's stores, McDonald's, Taco Bell's, Etsy. I bought a pattern. Stop your patterns. How about develop a pattern and paying off debt and not being like going to die in poverty? Michael's, Starbucks, Whataburger. Send it out 50 bucks.

You're sending out 50 bucks too. I don't know. P. Terry, Starbucks, Amazon, Starbucks. Sending out money. Five bucks. You don't know who you're sending money to, so I'm not going to ask again. McDonald's, Starbucks. Sending out 25 dollars. You don't know where it goes. Starbucks, McDonald's, Door Dashing, Cabo Bob's. More Cabo Bob's. I think that's me moving money to my Chase Checking. You go out to eat every single day of your life. Yes, in December. That was probably true. Steam purchase. That's not going to encourage you to move.

Taco Bell, Morph's team, Target, probably some bulls**t with knowing how you do things, McDonald's, McDonald's, Starbucks, Dairy Queen, Chick-fil-A, Taco Bell, McDonald's, Starbucks, Starbucks, Fairyloot, Cobblebops, oh my f**k. Oh, what the f**k, guys? F**king precious! Look at this, guys! What are we doing? F**king doing!

Target, Books, P. Terry's, Russell's Bakery, Target, Michael's Stores, Russell's Bakery, StubHub, 50 bucks, Amazon, Starbucks, too good to go, too good to go, Amazon, go win it, I guess I'm bolder. Starbucks, huh? Huh? I got a lot of bread from that. What? I got a lot of bread from my too good to go order. I have like a whole loaf in my freezer.

And it was only like $10. Why are we obsessed with bread? What the f*** are we talking about? Why are we bragging about bread right now? What are you a f***ing duck? Well then I can have it in the freezer and... You know you can make your own bread for cheaper. I did try the sourdough starter. And that's actual home bread. I did try that. Taco Bell sending out $358.48.

Do you know where that went? So anytime the money moves somewhere, it's me sending money to my Chase checking. Oh my gosh. So that we can try to not overdraft even though you overdrafted like four times, right? Yes. I think you need to consolidate into one checking account because you cannot manage to save your fucking life. Yeah, that's probably true. Whataburger, Alamo Draft House, Mexican Restaurant, McDonald's, Twitch Plus, Twitch Interactive. So I see gaming and Twitch. Is that a big part of you? Yeah.

um yeah so i i that's actually how me and my ex met we met on twitch yeah well don't do that again obviously yeah um but yeah i watch like streamers and i play games sometimes who's your streamer um i like watching like valkyrie and ludwig i know valkyrie and i know of ludwig i've heard valkyrie's name don't know her yeah those are there it's a lot of people who used to be really into like the among us

when that was kind of popular. Okay. And I still watch them. You sent out money, Animal Draft House, went to Target, Amazon, Amazon, this is crazy, more Etsy. Gotta get some patterns, guys. Went in, got some bulls**t from the gas station. Beans Cafe, Beans Cafe, Beans Cafe. Oh, if it isn't fees, if it isn't $34.76 of fees over draft. Well, that's from sending money. Oh, sending money, fees, you have to.

Yeah. So I'm curious if I should keep my money in the Chase or if I should keep it in there so I don't and like move over all my auto. I don't know this bank. I use Chase. Chase is fine. Yeah, but that one gets the interest. So your interest is paying overdraft fees that don't matter. Yeah, but what if you keep it in the checking that has interest versus the checking? Did you hear the new Mega Millions jackpots are going to be higher than ever? How high? Like really high.

As high as the top of this helipad? Higher. This hot air balloon is high enough, right? Higher. Higher than this 14,000-foot mountain? Still higher. Okay, we're in space. How much higher can the Mega Millions jackpot get? There's really no telling. The bigger, better, new Mega Millions. Millions. From the California Lottery. Play today. Please play responsibly. Must be 18 years or older to purchase, play, or claim. It doesn't have interest. You're overdressing. I don't care. Go to one. I don't care. Just go to one.

Sure. Okay. It doesn't matter. You have $4,000 in retirement. I actually have like eight or seven. I have two. Oh, because you have two. Yeah, you have about like eight to 9,000. Good. Oh, it's an hour and a half. All right. Let's see if we can budget you. Okay. I have all my...

Oh, she has her numbers. Yeah, she's incapable of following them. Yeah, I'm not going to trust your numbers. Well, I have all your income. $3,600. $3,400. Oh, $3,400. So I have $3,400 and then I take out $3,200 from my HSA. But that goes directly to therapy. So it kind of evens out. Hold on. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. But okay. Yes. Yes. Then we'll cross that out.

I'll put therapy under there, but you already have it accounted for. Yeah. Debt minimum fees, $843.18. Okay, your rent and everything? Rent plus the bullshit fees. Yes, yes, yes. It's like $1309. Okay, $1309. Utilities? The electric is the only one that's... The rent's too expensive. You don't have to live like that here in Austin. I know for a fact. Electric is $25. And then AT&T Internet is $60. Is there any gas? No. No.

25 for electric. That's really cheap. That was my first bill. I'm not sure what. Oh, it's going to go up. I'm going to mark it as maybe 40. I'm going to call it 75. Gas, room, room, drive, drive. Probably about $45. Phone bill? It is 115. How? What is with people? I have this. Because you financed it. Yeah. Oh my gosh. They have created a racket. I think it's almost done. I think I have to. Good. When it's done, switch the fucking

f***ing helium. 15 bucks a month. Same towers as T-Mobile. What is it for now? Again? 115. That's insane. How do people pay so much for that crap? Car insurance? 137.

TP Fund, $100. Anything else you need to survive? All the Taylor Swift you need plus toilet paper. What's the difference? Food, $300 a month. Use our budget-friendly cookbook. Oh, it's right here. Look at that. There it is. There it is. You get it with the Simpler Money Premium or the Simpler Budget app when you sign up for premium and you get the digital version of the cookbook and work on a physical option as well. Yeah.

uh check that out medical we have the therapy anything else well yeah what's your copay well like what are we putting there i would probably give like 125 a month for extra yeah for like all my okay medicines and stuff that i need perfect what you need uh so it's insulin i have a sensor that's like 70 bucks for a month i have like other no more door dash okay a little more trail lights yes

Well, that's done, but yeah. Yeah, but you can repeat that. You can do it the whole thing. Listen, I know I've been joking and some people are going to see it as me insulting and stuff like that. As I'm going through the process as well, I'm like finally starting to take some things a little seriously after some conversations and whatnot. So only a couple of weeks in, whatever. It doesn't matter. But either way, I mean, it's just, it's seriously just, I want you to live a long life. And I'm not going to baby you. And I want you to live a long life and a financially healthy life. And it's not...

Let's just be real. It is not okay for someone to just hear and say, it's okay. Yeah, I agree. It's not okay. You're objectively unhealthy. I'm objectively unhealthy. Yeah. Let's take control of this. Let's acknowledge it. Let's not hurt ourselves for it. Like no one's...

suggesting that but let's work on it that'll help lower your cost and I want you you're going to put in so much work to get out of debt I want you to actually live a long life in order and reap the benefits right yeah because what's the point of getting out of debt saving for retirement if you won't retire I think I

I think if I cancel the DoorDash pass, that will really deter me from ordering. I hope so. Delete the app. Because the fees, like after I see the fees, I'm like, actually, no, I really don't want to order that. But I think because the Dash pass... You're just going to follow the cookbook and you're going to make our budget on the recipes. I did unpack all of my cooking supplies, so... Well, that's the basic necessity. I'm not going to high five you. What is your...

Pet food? Probably about $30 a month. Okay. On a monthly basis, axing out the therapy because that's covered. Yeah, it cancels itself out. $3,134.18. So with the $3,400, you have an extra $265.82 left on a monthly basis. That's brutal living. With that, I mean, even if we minus the student loans. Just $132.

Actually, your bad debt. We talked a lot about a lot of debts, but they don't end up too much at $10,136. It's still horrendous. What? I shouldn't pay my student loans? Why are we subtracting it? Because you're doing minimum payments until they're paid off. I'm trying to figure out what it would take to pay off the rest of this stuff as hard as possible.

Without any fund money. It would still take 38 months, even for just $10,000. And $10,000 is substantial, but it's low compared to a lot of people on the show. And it's low for how many debts we went through. That still takes three years. Three years to pay off. And then your student loans, that's probably going to take like, probably like seven more years. Then you've got to save up for an emergency fund. This is probably three years and three quarters. So you can do that.

The reality of your situation, probably going to need to pick up a part-time job or something. I'm probably getting a raise in April. Raise is going to be good. I don't think it's going to stretch far enough. I need you to bring an extra $750. Buddy, you can knock this down in under a year if you bring in an extra $750. Not a year. Three years or a year. Yeah. I choose a year. Call it a year and a half and you got fully funded emergency fund. You can stop that job now.

And your life has changed. And you can 50, 30, 20 until retirement. And your life has changed. You just need to take control. Here's the summaries of the conversation. You're lazy beyond lazy. You make endless excuses that everyone just doing things that everyone goes through. And you're just not so far haven't been willing to put in the effort. If you do, we can get you out of debt in a year. Even if you put in the minimum effort required, you can do this in three years. But you can do more than that.

Should I be putting like the, I get a stock payout every quarter? Should I put that towards a certain debt? We'll bleep it. What's the stock? It's with my company. Okay. It's about $700 every quarter. What discount are they giving you on it?

Or is it just free? Yeah, it's like part of my package of employment. Yeah, that's fine. I think so. Well, how much? Okay. I see. So it's $700 every quarter and I choose when I get the money sent to have them take out the taxes and stuff up front. That's not make or break for you. You can. Okay. You can. Yeah, it's not make or break. You can. I would go get that extra $750 on a monthly basis.

All right, guys, make sure to join us in the post show. That's where we have an extra 20 minutes of fun after every episode. And usually we uncover something big as well because the producers, they know everything about your life and I don't, there's always things missed and we got like over a thousand hours of extra content. Make sure you join hammer elite for the best value of your dollar spending a budget. Let's get your hammer financial score spending your budget. Yo. Oh, you didn't even go over it, dude. It's crazy. Let's find out. We know your income and you spent $9,000. Okay. Okay.

Well, that's with all the house stuff. Yeah, it's with all the money that went out. And we also know you spent $900 going out to eat. Yeah, okay. All right, all right. Zero to ten debt. No collections right now, right? No collections. The debt's bad.

I think we can get out of it relatively easy. As far as that goes, it's more of a 2 out of 10. Emergency fund, nothing saves, 0 out of 10. Retirement, barely started. I'm going to say, well, with $8,000, with where you are with your income, 27. I'm going to give you about a 3 out of 10 there.

Because we are going for retirement for age. And then real estate, zero out of 10 for now. It's going to be a hammer financial score. One out of 10. Guys, we'll see you in the post show. And don't forget to download the new Simpler Budget app. You get a free trial and it's great. Automatic connections actually change your life for the first time forever.

I'll see you in the post show. What did you possibly f***ing do? I went to go see Taylor Swift in Miami. I want to give a little reminder for everyone out there. She had to borrow $1,500 to move. She had to borrow $1,500. I didn't know. I didn't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She had to borrow $1,500 to damn move. It's not paying on her credit cards. But what did she choose over her mom? She chose Taylor f***ing Swift over her mom. She chose...

Swift over her mom. Guess what Taylor's taking? With the Chiefs. With the Chiefs. To watch the financial audit post show, click the join button below.