This MLB season, FanDuel's Dinger Tuesday is back. And this year, all customers get a profit boost to bet home runs every week. So gear up to go yard all season long on FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook. 21 plus and present in select states. Opt-in required. Bonus issued is non-withdrawable profit boost tokens. Restrictions apply, including any token expiration and max wage or amount. See full terms at FanDuel.com slash sportsbook. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER.
To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. You got your boyfriend fired by emailing someone else's t*** to everyone in the company? She deserved it. Why? Would you do this, you crazy? I had taken dog s*** and smeared it all over the windshield, which is another story entirely. And you drained your savings to bail yourself out of jail when you hit your husband and then escaped a cop car? Yeah. What the f*** did I even just say? That's insane. I ended up going to jail for felony s***.
Download my budgeting app today and take control of your money once and for all. And for a limited time only, sign up for the annual version of premium and get my cookbook and notebook signed and mailed directly to you. Link in the description and pin comment below. Hi, my name is Kaylee. I am 37 years old. I live in Mariposa, California, and welcome to Financial Audit.
Welcome, welcome. Thanks for coming over to Austin. What do you do for a living in Mariposa? I work at a hotel front desk. Cool. That's probably not a ton of money. $20 an hour. I don't know Mariposa. Is it on the coast? No, it's in Central California, just outside of Yosemite National Park. Okay, that helps with price, right? Yeah. Honestly, not too familiar with the Central California life. I get paid very well for the area. Well, you get paid well, but the cost of living, that's what I'm concerned about. What do you make?
$20 an hour. And how many hours a week do you work? I work four days a week, eight hours a day. Do you want me to do the math? Is that what's being asked? A quick little 32 hours a week. So $20 an hour is pretty nice. But if we're not working 40 hours a week, it doesn't stretch as far. I know, but I don't want to work 40 hours a week. I like having Friday, Saturday, Sunday off.
Why don't you work more hours of the days, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday? I do work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. More hours to get to 40 hours a week. More than eight? I mean, I do when they let me, but they're pretty stingy. What are they stingy about? Overtime. It wouldn't be overtime though, would it?
More than eight hours a day is overtime in California. Oh, California. Makes it impossible to run a business. If you want to work, just let you work. My goodness, it's so weird. I mean, they want me to work more. No, they want you to. The state doesn't. No, no, yeah. Okay. Okay, so you sound like you should probably work on Friday. I mean, obviously we're struggling. If we're on the show, we're struggling. I don't think you really have the choice to take a Friday off. Then you should probably actually have a second job
of the hours that you're working because if you're on this show, you're usually financially fucked. It's typically how it goes. Yes. So what is going on? What are you doing? That kind of sounds like a dumb philosophy. Well,
been considering offering to work every other Friday because my boyfriend just got a job up there where I live where he will have every other Friday off. So then if we could like both have that one Friday off. Dude, you're an adult. You're allowed to work five days a week. Come on. This is a privileged position in the history of humanity. Most times you'd be working sunrise to sundown until you're dead in your 30s. I know.
but I don't want to do that. You're lucky working nine... No. What I'm saying, working nine to five Monday through Friday is not the worst. It's, in fact, the best. A cushy front desk job, $20 an hour? In the history of humanity, that's considered good. It is actually... If you have bills to pay, work. Yeah. Is it better than nine to five? I only work from 6 a.m. to 2 p.m., so I have, like, the whole day ahead of me when I get off. It's pretty tits. Yeah, but that's pretty tits. Okay, interesting. But...
That means you probably go to bed earlier anyway. I mean, your days are just shifted, right? I don't need a lot of sleep. Okay, okay. Well, that's not what matters here. What matters is if you're on the show, you're probably not doing financially well. Well, obviously. I don't think you get to take a day off of work a week. What hits your account on a monthly basis? So like after everything that comes out,
Like $1,100 every two weeks. So $2,200 every month. How are you possibly surviving? How are you possibly? I really don't have a lot of bills. Like I don't have a car payment. My rent is like very cheap. Why are there so many documents? That's not making any sense. Well. An answer would be helpful. I don't have a whole lot of bills. I just, well, other than credit cards.
You don't consider those bills? Yes, yes, those are bills. But I don't have like... Well, why are we in credit card debt then if we didn't have a lot of bills? Because if we didn't have a lot of bills, we wouldn't have to go into credit card debt in order to buy the things we want to buy. But now you have credit card debt and all of a sudden those are bills. So why the f*** do we have credit card debt? Um, because with all that time off that I have every week, I go out and do a lot of things. Then equal, equal reason to not take the time off on Fridays. If you spend more money because you don't work there, then don't f***ing take time off work. And if you're not making enough money, then don't.
Take time off work! I just, I don't, I'm not like a career girly. I would rather be at home like doing domestic things. Trad wife? You want to trad it up? No! You don't look trad. I like to have spending money, but I don't like, I like to keep a clean house and I like to cook and I like to like, you know, I have to have time to do that stuff. So you like everything about being a stay-at-home wife other than being called a stay-at-home wife? You could say that! Yeah, I could tell from the tattoos. Okay.
Uh, is that an option? Where are you in this relationship? I don't know. You mean like when he moves back in? He doesn't live there currently. I don't know. Is he moving back in? Yeah, he starts his new job on the 23rd. I didn't know he moved out. Did I know you guys ever lived together in the first place? Why are you acting like I know anything about you? Well, we did... I don't. We did live together, but he had...
Fair. I support. So you want to be a stay-at-home wife to...
I'm not going to quit my job when he moves in. But I mean... No, but you want to in general, be his stay-at-home wife. No, I think I would always like to have a little part-time job where I could have my own spending money. I would like that. I'm not a career girly. I don't have hopes and dreams of like... What do you aspire to in life? How the fuck can we do anything if you don't have nothing to... Well, I mean, I do have hopes and dreams, but they're not employment-related.
What are some of your hopes and dreams? Because they might be connected to employment. Oh, I like to travel. Traveling is good. You need money to travel. You need a job to get money to travel. Sounds like it's tied. Yes. The good thing about this job that I have is I get... You have the one where you work less than 40 hours a week, yeah. Yes, that one. I get really, really good hotel discounts.
So... Great. Spending money you literally do not have still, though. I spend the money before it's, like, even there. If I want to go get McDonald's and instead of $15, it's $10 because they have a value pack going on, but I don't have $10 to spend, I still don't spend it because I don't have $10. What are you talking about? Well, that's where the credit cards come in. All of the... Yeah, no shit. Yeah. And obviously you can't afford that. Okay, goals and aspirations, more. Give. Give.
Just, what do you, I'm simple. I'm a simple girlie. I just like live and stay home, big bread, maybe take a flight every now and again. Girl, you're 40 and you're a failure. That's embarrassing. You live in an embarrassing life right now. I don't think it's embarrassing necessarily. What do you have going for you in life? A boyfriend that you had to kick out that is now potentially coming back in. Yes. You don't care about anything in terms of your ambitions or any purpose in life.
You want to travel, have no money to do it, only went into credit card debt to do it. What is there to look at you and be like, oh, that's someone I look up to. I'm going to just call it how I see it. I don't necessarily need you to look up to me. Yeah, but it just shows how you are. Yeah. And it's important to know how you are from a self-reflection standpoint, absolutely. But also someone else can see that isn't you. And I'm just going to know you. I've only been talking to you, what, nine minutes? But I've learned enough to know that you got nothing going on. And that's not cute.
But is that like the worst thing in the world, though? It means that you're living an insignificant life. You'll never be remembered by a single person. That's all right. Okay. I mean, you're... Okay. That's fine. If you have no desires to leave even an impact on someone's life in this world... I think I leave like a good enough impact on my son's life. You have a kid. I do. Okay. That's even worse then. Yeah. Because you should...
How old's the kid? He's 11. Oh, f*** me. I was hoping he was out of the house. No! Oh, f*** me. I'm not that old. Wait, you're 37. If you had a kid at 18, they'd be out of the house, right? Isn't that how math works? Yeah, but... So, I mean, that's fine. I was out of the house by the time my parents were 37. I knew...
Okay, so you have a kid. You're prioritizing nothing in life, meaning you can barely pay bills and not put them through programs that they want to get through. And you're certainly not going to pay for the college. And they're definitely going to have to take care of you when you're older because you've done nothing to sacrifice for your future. Why would you say no? Go ahead. Give me a logical answer. Well, his...
Dad's side of the family is pretty well off. That doesn't mean you get taken care of. No, no, I'll take care of myself. Doubt it. Listen, having to take care of my mother, I've learned. I'm never going to put my son through that. You've learned yet. You've done nothing to fix it. Lady, if you don't have retirement. I do. How much is in your retirement? I don't, it's in there. I think 27, but I might be making that up. I could be making that up. That's nothing for your age. That's not going to last a year.
Listen. Well, I've got time. You're going to be your mother, not by your choice. No, yes, by your choice, but not by you wanting to do it. Your mom, I don't know if I'm going to say what you're going to be. You're going to be in a situation where you cannot retire, cannot keep a roof over your head. You're going to be struggling. Maybe you become, you know, who knows what Social Security is going to be like by the time you are retired. And if you take early Social Security, it's going to be less. I don't know. You have bills to pay for it. You struggle for it. Your son's not going to let you...
suffer. Not going to let you suffer. He's going to be morally obligated as your son to take care of you. It's not going to be you asking. He is going to help and he's going to put his life on hold to help. So yes. And that is you being selfish because you want to travel the world now and not work on Fridays and have nothing going for you in life. That's a joke. If you're doing it as a motherless
You know, lady forever? Sure. You can do that. You can do whatever because no one's dependent on you. You know, whatever. That's fine. Some will judge, some will not. I don't care. You have a kid. Yes. At this point, it's embarrassing and borderline disgusting, the life you're living. I disagree. How? I don't think it's disgusting. How? How?
How is it not disgusting? I mean, he has a lovely home, two lovely homes that he splits his time between. He goes on trips with me too. Built on debt. Debt that is going to set you back in life and then the kid is going to have to take care of you. Put his life on hold to do that because mama was selfish and wanted to go on vacations and not work. Tell me how that's not disgusting. Because I think... We see it in our culture all the time and it's a barely talked about thing. It's not talked about enough.
Because no one wants to put the blame on their parents. The main goal then in life would be to make sure he doesn't have to take care of me. Great, you're completely failing at that and you're 40. Well, I just came up with it right now. But your catch up is immense. You have to invest double, triple what someone in their 20s has to in order to retire with a decent amount. Which I could probably do that after I clear through all this. How are you even managing your finances now? Chat GPT.
Obviously. How else would I be doing that? The f*** is Jipita saying about this? Well, we worked out a plan to like pay off all three credit cards that I have, which one of them doesn't really count because it's like... What are you asking GPT? For like a schedule on how to pay off my debt-ish, which it has been working.
To an extent. For two cards, it has been working. For the third card, I just continue. You spent more than you brought in last month. I don't know what you're talking about. Yes. How much came in last month? Like $2,200. How much spent? No, maybe more than... Because sometimes I do get overtime. You had a little bit of overtime. $3,000 came in. How much went out? Damn. More than $3,000? $3,400. Are you sure? Yeah.
Hey, GPT, what do I do about someone's financial situation if they have no idea what they're talking about and they're prioritizing their lives over their children's? She says she's 37, looks 57, has tattoos all over her body. The f*** I do. And has clown lipstick on, if that helps. Let's see.
Here's a direct and clear path. Establish clear boundaries. Here's the boundary between me and you. I don't like you. Okay. Number two, direct and factual communication. Factual? Yeah.
You're being a selfish mother. Not good. Focus on priorities. Your child, not your travels. Recommended require counseling. Sure, I'll set you up with a sound or mind therapist. I use them. Document and follow up. Oh, we're going to do that. You better believe it. Take proactive actions if necessary. Don't spend money you don't have! Regarding her appearance, be firm, clear, compassionate. I believe I already did. But prioritize the child's well-being.
He's very well being. Reported to social services. I don't think we need to go that far, but that is what GPT has said. Your financial advisor of choice. Did you name your chat GPT? I just call her her. Oh, she's a her. Yeah. It's very progressive of you. I'm sexist like you. Okay, so. Yes. What have you learned through the GPT?
What have I learned about the finances from ChatGPT? What does she say about the boyfriend coming back in the house? Why'd you kick him out in the first place? How'd you learn? How did I learn? Yeah, like what was like the breaking point?
Okay. Well, so I knew that he struggled with alcohol like when I got together with him, obviously. Interesting couple choice. Okay. Yeah, I know. I have also had my struggles with alcohol in the past. What? Shocker. So...
four months after we met and prior to living with me he had never lived anywhere besides with his mother. How old is he? I wasn't rushing you. Oh, you were breathing hard. I was reacting. He's 34. 34.
I know. Again, an interesting spousal choice. Okay, continue. I wasn't on the prowl. Continue. Okay, so he moved in after four months and the alcoholism just went up level 100. Yeah, he wasn't with his mother anymore and he probably enabled them. Yeah.
Yeah, so my drinking, the whole thing came to a head. Do you want a good story or do you want to wait for the post-show for that? Because it's juicy. Good story, but not that long. Okay, so...
I had this little feeling after a lot of drinking that he was doing. I just had one of those little women. We all do our best thinking after getting completely fucked up. Totally. So I picked up his phone and I found that one of his coworkers had sent him some naughty photos. In his defense, they were unsolicited. However, he did kind of like play into it. Did he delete?
No. No, no. Yeah, yeah. And so I may have overreacted a bit and I went online and I got the email address for every single person in the company and I sent her titties and their text thread to every person in the company. So naturally, he got fired. And you should have gone to jail? There were no nips.
They were just, you know. That's still kind of revenge. She deserved it. So she got fired? No, no. Her and her husband, her husband works there too. They are like darlings of the company. So they were fine. So wait, who got fired? My boyfriend. You got your boyfriend fired by emailing someone else's tits to everyone in the company? And their whole conversation, yeah. Why? Would you do this, you crazy? I was, yeah, it was a bit reactionary, but.
Why would he ever even consider staying with you? You're insane. Well, that's not the only thing. Like, he also drinking, we got into a bit of an argument and he took my car because...
He took your car. He couldn't take his car because I had taken dogs and smeared it all over the windshield, which is another story entirely. And so he had gone to this casino that's like sort of nearby. And when he was leaving the casino, instead of turning left or right like a normal person, he just fucking went straight and drove over a bush and totaled my car. Oh my God. So there were a
Why are you guys getting back together? Because he's just my favorite thing that has ever existed. Which is why you smeared dog s*** on his face. And got him fired by emailing all his co-workers. If someone emailed me all my co-workers, I'm never talking to them again. That's just crazy, i.e. you're kind of crazy. She do be crazy. No, that's not cute. No, I know, but that's why I don't drink, you see. That's good, I am happy to hear that. How long have you been sober? Um...
This time? I don't know. About as long as him, but like I did, like I've had a beer here or there. He has had nothing. Prior to meeting him, I had just come off of quitting drinking for a year because I woke up with a broken ankle and I didn't know how it happened. So I was like, oh, well, I better maybe take a break. So I took a break. Mm-hmm.
But anyway, so to answer your question, what was the question? It was... The drinking, I get it. It can make you do crazy things, but you're also just kind of crazy. Yeah. Oh, you asked why did I finally kick him out of the house? An alcoholic who smears dog shit, who emails tits, revenge to all coworkers. There were no nipples. Doesn't want to work 40 hours a week, has no career aspirations. No. Only wants to leave her child to travel. He comes with me. You're not a good person.
I never claimed to be. You're okay with that? It's a spectrum. Like, I'm good in a lot of areas. What? What am I good at? Baking. Not makeup. Sorry, keep going. Baking? Yeah. What? Laced makeup?
Special cookies? Yes. Yeah. But I don't do that anymore unless somebody asks. Or else you could add that has something someone could respect. Private student loan debt can be overwhelming. If you're seeking a more affordable way forward, YRefi is here to help. Unlike traditional lenders, YRefi is focusing on your desire and ability to repay, not just your credit score.
With guaranteed interest rates under 6%, they offer a pathway towards lower monthly payments. YRefi also provides a co-signer release program, giving you and your family peace of mind. Their dedicated representatives walk you through each step, ensuring you feel supported and informed throughout the process. Thousands of clients have experienced relief, and YRefi's 4.6-star rating on Google speaks to the service and guidance they provide.
This is more than just refinancing. It's a chance to regain control of your financial future. If you're ready to work toward a more manageable student loan payment, visit whyrefi.com. Discover how their tailored approach can reduce your stress, lower your interest, and simplify your repayment journey.
Take the first step in making your private student loan debt more affordable. Go to Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash hammer. That's Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash hammer. Or call 888-Y-R-E-F-Y dash 78. That is 888-Y-R-E-F-Y dash 78. And see how they can help you move forward with confidence.
of good at like anything I do anything I try to do well you were very good at drinking you know that but I've never like had a job where I'm not the best one there I do do you know how well you're doing while you're there what do you mean do I know how well I'm doing while I'm there yeah I know how well I'm doing while I'm there your job is to check people in out
I'm the morning girl. Okay, and most people just don't. You would fucking think. But they like to stop by and tell me their life story. You're bragging about being the best person at checking people out when only half the people do that. Yeah, I know, I know.
Sorry, I know I'm being a bit rude, but I also really kind of want to lay this out in a real world situation where I can't have you thinking that you're in any kind of respectable position because you're not. You need to change your life. 37 years is a little late to do it, but you can do it. I know. I'm ready to do it now. I'm ready to grow up now.
Aha says with the dad heart tattoo. He died on Valentine's Day. Tell me that's not the cutest fucking thing you've ever seen. What year? My dad. What year? 23. He was very old. He was 80. I thought maybe I was born when he died and that maybe I'm your new father. Oh, Jesus. But no. I'm sorry for his passing. Thank you. That sucks. Ugh.
Okay, so you're kind of a crazy ex, except now back together. So he's coming back in? He's coming back in, yeah. And you guys enable your bad behavior? No, we are... You do when you live together. Yes, but we have both come a long way. Yeah, not living together. But he's there every weekend. He comes up every weekend. It's a little different.
We both have had many, many conversations and have very clear... You met him just two weeks after leaving the 12-year relationship you had? Uh-huh. I know. I know. I don't think this is a healthy thing for you. I don't know.
I cannot imagine, like, I can't imagine life without him. This is insane. He paid for your tummy and arm tuck. My ex. What, you were fat? Oh, yeah. Before? Yeah. Good job. Well done. Thank you. It was over $15,000, and then you broke up with him a month after the surgery? Yeah, the timing on that was pretty... From the outside! From the... I will give you that. From the outside looking in, the timing on that is pretty... It's awful.
But listen, in my defense, the surgery had been scheduled like five, six months prior to that, but my dad was dying. At least give him a few months. I know, but my dad was dying, so I pushed it forward. But give him a few months after completion of a surgery he pays for. At least lead him on for a bit. I couldn't do it anymore. Listen, I was sitting in therapy, and the light bulb went off, and I was like, it's been seven years since the last time I broke up with him, and nothing has changed. Everything is still exactly the same, and I'm not getting any younger, obviously. So I had to scoot boots.
Scoot boobs? Scoot boots! Get out! You know? Oh. Is there anything...
even remotely healthy about this relationship, if we're being honest. The only fight that we've ever been in that, like, doesn't involve alcohol, like, since we've been drinking... Or smearing or getting him fired? Yeah. Listen, the smearing is because he brought home a dog that I didn't want, and it pooped in the house. Yes, what a very mature response you had. I mean, okay. Yeah, go ahead. Okay, what is this? Anyway, so the one, like, big... that we got in, like, since the quitting of the drinking is...
I really needed a car because, like I said, he had crashed my car the year before. And I took out a loan from my baby daddy without asking my boyfriend first, which offended him and hurt his feelings. But in my defense, there's no way he would have been able to qualify for a loan. No, but it's weird. Baby daddy? Loan?
I paid him back quick, though. I was just waiting for my taxes to hit. Yeah, you're... It was the first time I had a tax return in a lot of years. You have your single mom tax credit. It's like a big Christmas. We're really supporting the best futures here, ladies and gentlemen. This show is changing my perception of the world, let me tell you. It's fucking crazy, the things that we have witnessed. Okay. Okay.
Yes. What the f***? You broke up with your baby daddy because he had no sex drive, but then you guys broke up when you got pregnant? Yeah. These notes that I'm being fed are insane. No, I know. You are a creature. No, yeah. So because he wouldn't f*** you, but clearly did because you got pregnant, and then you wait until getting pregnant?
Hold on. I often refer to my son as the second coming of Christ because I don't know how in the very few times that we did be intimate that I got pregnant. And also, I didn't know that I was pregnant until not a lot. Not very much. And he was working out of town at that time. Once a week, once a month, once a year. Once a week is probably three times a month tops.
You broke up with him because of that after you got pregnant? Hold the fuck on. Okay, so I broke up with him not knowing that I was pregnant. And then I found out I was pregnant. And I was already 14 fucking weeks along pregnant, which is like halfway through. So we kept the baby, obviously. And he's just the best little thing. So yeah, we got back together because I was pregnant. And then we broke up again when my son was like...
I don't know, two or three, and then found our way back together for whatever f***ing reason. Because you try. You try to make it work. You try. But then it doesn't. Listen, when the man doesn't have a... And then you broke up a final time and then found an alcoholic in two weeks. I know. I know from the outside it looks f***ing nuts. I know. Has anything in your life not looked bat s*** insane, crazy? Probably not. No, I don't think so. Listen, I got to get into these finances, but...
You're wild. And then your chat GP team, it's clearly not working. I use that for everything. I'm not anti that. It's a good search engine for sure. Okay, what do you think your financial score is? Zero to ten. Point five. Point five, okay. If you guys want to see where you stand in the world of finances, take our assessment. It's free. Go to calebhammer.com or click that link in the description below. You can also go to calebhammer.com slash apply to be on this show. I'm going to jump into Venture One.
What's going on? That's the one that I still actively spend on, which is mostly like... Why the f*** would you do that? Well, that's mostly like for travel. Like if I'm traveling... Okay, so follow-up question. Why the f*** would you do that? Oh, because I... No, no, no.
to have one like active for like emergencies and stuff. Granted, the travel is not... $2,687 in travel are not emergencies. This isn't an emergency thing. You went and spent $410 on a credit card that already had a high balance. You spent double what you put towards it as a minimum payment. Well, $46.80 interest is accruing.
What are you talking about emergencies? Fuck you, emergencies. This isn't an emergency. This is dumb as tits. What was the 410? I think we'll find out. How about you should probably know. I know, I know, I know. $73 minimum monthly payment. How long does this take to pay off if you do not? If you do not purchase on it and you only do minimum payments, which you're incapable of not purchasing. Here's the thing.
I'm not purchasing what? Okay, I don't ever, ever just make the minimum payment. Ever. It doesn't matter because you still spent double what you put towards it, so it doesn't fucking matter. All while interest is accruing. How long does it take to pay off? Minimum of the payment is only no purchases. How much is it? How much is the... $2,687 with a minimum of the payment of $73. Nine years. 15. Nine. 14. Yeah. What are we at that point? 61.
Sorry. 51? Yeah. Sorry, I was going off your looks. We make jokes here. We make jokes here. Every joke is based in reality. Okay. We make jokes here. Uh-huh. This is a fun one. I get to get you free money and then I get to get myself free money. It's a pure win-win for both of us. What do you have to do? Sign up for a SoFi High Yield Savings account and get a welcome bonus of $300. Sign up for Acorns using my link and get totally free.
Lowe's?
That's the same one. Vons, some grocery, PlayStation Network. Okay, wait a minute. Disposal, gas. Well, hold it. The PlayStation Network, in my f***ing defense, we gave that PlayStation away and I can't, like, I can't get rid of the f***ing monthly thing. I don't know what email address or anything. Report it. Report the payment. I did. I did through Capital One. Who did you sell it to? Talk to them. I don't know. What? I know. How do you not know?
You don't know who you gave it to? Facebook Marketplace. I could probably go back and... So go back... Yeah, you could probably go back forever! Yeah. Yeah! Yeah.
I made a minimal effort through Capital One. I was like, don't pay this. Minimal, which is the definition of your life. Minimal effort in anything and everything you've done, including your entire career. Well, career, yeah. That's an important part of a life. Communist, capitalist, doesn't matter. Careers are important. For some people. No, that's an important part of life, not just for you. That's an important part of paying bills, finding purpose, right?
If you're going to spend the majority of your time at work, do what you like. And you have to find your way into it. Yeah. And fight for it. Yes, it's an important part. For some people. How can I deal with you if you have such immature takes on that? I think that's a common question for everyone. I don't know. I don't know how to deal with me. I'm shocked my baby daddy dealt with me for as long as he did. Clearly he didn't because he left three times. I left. I was the leaver.
I was the leader. I'm sure he encouraged. No. Listen, total interest $183.42. You're spending money you do not have on a credit card. You cannot pay off that as a Korean interest.
Do you at least do side hustles here and there in this extra time? I mean, I could. I could go back to making edibles. I could make a lot of money on the side doing that, honestly, if I wanted. Why is that the thing we're doing? I mean, it's legal in California, but you have to be licensed. I'm sure what you're doing was not legal. No, no, it was not legal.
When were we doing that? What were you making? I'm sure you didn't pay taxes, right? No. Pay taxes on my drinks? Come on. I did that from 2020 to mid-2023. What made you stop? I got burned out. I monetized a hobby and I didn't like it anymore. I would not recommend doing anything illegal, but what the f*** can we get a side hustle that's perhaps not illegal?
Probably. What do you enjoy doing in life? Like, when I get off work, what do I do? I'll, like, smoke a s*** and water my plants and stuff. I like plants. Oh my goodness, you are such a failure. Oh my gosh, you are such a failure. A lot of people smoke s***, Caleb. Yeah, you're doing this every day after work. A lot of people smoke s***. Wow. It's like f***ing your fumes are...
Making me high. Okay, so... Recu... Recu... Recu... Recu... Rec... Rec... Today, Junior! Recreationally. Uh, that... Yeah, but that's not daily. If you're daily, you're on an occurrence, and then... What do I like to do in terms that I could, like, monetize and make a side hustle out of? What do you like to do? Maybe I can find something.
I could work more at the job that I have. I just don't want to. So let's find a job that you would be happier to pick up time. Let me tell you, the employment fucking opportunities around there are not like plentiful. Then move. No. Why?
I, I'm, my boyfriend and I do want to move like probably after, I'm sorry, probably after my son finishes high school. Why are we waiting until then? I don't want to leave him now. No, leave, take it. I'll f***ing the split custody. Yeah.
And what we have now is, like, good. Like, we all get along really well together. My baby daddy and my boyfriend and I and my son. Do you at least have any savings to show for all this time? So, why I don't have savings currently, why I haven't built that back up comes... Built back? Back, because I did have some. How did you have? I had, like, three grand. When? Not like, whoo! Oh, it's money. Okay, yes. Well, I had that, but when...
Back to why I kicked my boyfriend out of the house is because this had all come to a head where I ended up going to jail for felony domestic violence. Oh, she's a critch! But it was a holiday weekend, so I didn't want to be there from Friday morning to Tuesday morning, so I had to use that $3,000 for bail to get out because I didn't want to. I thought you were going to say domestic abuse isn't applicable during holidays. Yeah.
It is. What did you do? You're insane. Why are you here? You scare me. I don't, I browned back in, like, because I don't really remember a lot of, like, the cops getting there and all that, but I do remember being in the cop car in the driveway, and they had put me in the front seat. What did they tell you you did?
Are you? What the fuck?
I know there's a lot going on all the time. And you think this is cute. Look at you giggling. Look at you giggling. You got to be that way. I have to be that way. You got to be that way? Let's giggle about us being a horrible parent. He wasn't there. Horrible human. Yeah, but you're still his mother. I am. I know. And you drained your savings to bail yourself out of jail and you hit your husband and then escaped the cop car. Yeah. What the f*** did I even just say? That's insane. And then you were in jail. I mean, all things considered. So the felony, where did that go? Away. Away.
Why? I just had to show up to court, I think, twice, and they dropped it. They never even fully filed it. Who was pursuing, him or the DA? The DA decided to not pursue charges. Do I look violent to you? I'm not violent. Not violent. You're singing George Strait, Garth Brooks. Yeah. Okay. Me and the cop, not just me. It was not a solo performance. She's a Garth Brooks girlie. She is. I was...
Lindsay actually on our call that I was kicked out of a Garth Brooks concert once. My third one. Do you want that story? No! Alright. Back to the finances. I'm f***ing trying. Okay. Okay.
My goodness, I have just insane notes about your spending. How you're just blowing money buying weight loss supplements from China on the gray market. It was like Ozempic and then you started buying things to lose weight and injecting them from China. Then you started getting into pharmaceuticals from India. You gained a bunch of weight when your boyfriend started dating. Yeah, I did, yeah. And now you're still spending $21 for 10 doses of bootleg Ozempic.
It's her appetite. There's a difference. What the? And you're reselling it to your friend? What are you doing? What are you doing? Not that bad from like the day to day. It's just when you look at it from the outside, it does look pretty. When we put your life together and actually look at it, it's crazy and f***ing insane. Yeah. It's horrible. 22.74% interest rate on this credit card. The first one? How many? Sorry, say again? Two.
No. Okay. Okay, Quicksilver won. What's going on with this? Okay, that one, I don't spend on that one anymore. I could not tell you the last time I spent on that one. Great, it's only at $3,788.54. Yeah. Yay, she's doing so well. Minimum monthly payment, $129. 20 years to pay this one off.
But I always pay like $400 on that one a month-ish. Nope. What do you mean, no? That's not how much you put towards it at all. So I don't know what you're talking about. What's the f*** going on? How'd you get into this debt? Do you remember getting into this debt? Did you f***ing... Is this a story that leads to smoking and getting into this debt? With you, I don't know at this point. No. Did you buy a bunch of cockroaches and put them in a bathtub and swim in them? I don't f***ing know with you, okay? Uh-uh.
That particular card has just been a thorn in my side for a long time. I haven't spent on that one in a long time because it has the higher interest rate. So I willy-nilly the other one. Right, like 22% versus like 28%. Yeah, it's great. I think, but that is not what's got me to this. I think if we could circle back to the traveling card,
it's like so last year just last year i went to hawaii twice mexico for hawaii mexico maybe but you have to really okay now wait a minute though see hawaii is not that bad because we wait until the flights are like 297 you can afford 297 okay but then my best friend her aunt has a house there so we don't pay for the house but you pay for we don't pay for the
You pay for food. We pay for food. We pay for food. Food and the flight. We don't do guided. We do our own thing. It still costs money to rent a boat or a paddle board or to go on parks and stuff. And food in Hawaii is very expensive. It is a bit. Honestly, I thought it was going to be a lot worse, but with California, it's... You can't afford anything. I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, God.
The hobbies, like the crystals and the plants and the... I could, I guess, see how the plants could be.
A bit. I do. So I like to go to. How much are you spending on these hobbies? Well, I like to go to Grocery Outlet Bargain Market because they always have really good plants. And I rationalize, like, if the plant is part of the grocery bill, it kind of, like, doesn't count in a way. You are such a mess. No, I know. The hardware store has really great plants, too. So if ever we have to go to the hardware store, there's always, there's a plant sneaking in there. Because it's like, it's not like I'm specifically. How fat were you?
At my highest. So I got the gastric bypass when I was 21 and I was like 220 pounds and I'm 5'2". How much do you weigh now? 130. That's incredible. That shows that you have actually one thing in life. Think of one thing in life that shows that...
If you want to, you can do it, which that gives me at least a little bit of hope with finances. But man, with everything else, I don't know. You seem fucking crazy. I don't seem. I mean, that's a lot. I mean, 90 pounds, right? Yeah. It's like a whole human. Yeah. A little one. That's a lot. That's a lot. If I lost weight, if I got down to 160 or 180, would I need fucking sleeve? Not sleeve. What was it? Oh, breaking a plastic?
I don't know. Would I need it? My arms... Would I need it? This is abdominoplasty. Would I need it? I don't know. I'd have to see without the shirt. Hey, guys. Always ask me, Caleb, what do you invest in? And honestly, I keep it pretty boring. Take a look at this. Take a look at this. This is my investments right here. And this is why you gotta follow me on Blossom if you want to see just that. A couple weeks back, I stumbled upon this social investing app called Blossom and thought, alright, let's give
let's give it a try. And it turns out it's actually really cool. And to be clear, they're not a brokerage. Blossom is a completely free social media platform. They're not your typical investing app. It's social, meaning you can follow exactly what I'm investing in and you can check out my portfolio in real time and even discuss strategies with me and other investors. There's no guessing games, just clear transparency. So if you're curious about how I'm investing or just
want to get smarter with your money, download Blossom right now. And you can follow me at Caleb Hammer. I'll be sharing my exact portfolio breakdown, investing tips, and even responding to your questions. It's totally free, super simple, and way more fun than just guessing stocks alone. So hit that link below, join me on Blossom, and let's grow our money together. Seriously, right now, you can actually see what my portfolio looks like today. Hey,
The arms were a way bigger thing than this. I really wanted the arms to go. Okay, I'm just wondering. The minimum payment is $129 again. It takes 20 years to pay this one off. That's too many. Too many years. Yeah, you'll be almost 60 at that one. Interest this year so far, almost $500 at 24%. Interest. It's insane. That's yucky.
In my downtime at work, because like I said, I get those- Because you do nothing, but you're the best at the job. Listen, mother-
I am the best at the job. When I'm not there, the s*** falls. The best at clicking a couple buttons. But there's more to it than that. I swear there's more to it than that. Okay, sorry. What were you saying? When I'm not there, the s*** falls apart. I'm already worried about the s*** I'm going to have to walk into tomorrow. What I was saying was in my downtime. Oh, no. Someone didn't get your time on time. When I was in, or when I'm in my downtime, I sit there and I plan little vacations. No. Yeah, because I.
Hotel rooms are cheap as like $45. But more goes to a vacation than a hotel. But when the hotel is only $45. It helps on the cost, but still, if you cannot afford $45, which you can't, then you can't. Even if something's at a discount, if you can't afford the discount, you can't sit at a discount. How many trips are we doing?
What? How much? 30 hours a week? No future, no retirement? How much? Well, this trip, for it to come here, I turned into a whole ass. But we reimbursed some things. Well, what have you done? You reimbursed my flight, yeah. So I flew in. We're not going to reimburse your entire vacation if you're making a vacation. I know. What are you doing? I flew into
Into San Antonio, and we spent two nights there. What can you do for two days in San Antonio? You can watch the little freaking lit up Cinderella carriages go by every minute. Yeah, for one day. Okay, go on.
What do you mean for one day? How much do you travel? A lot. Okay, so like I said, so last year I did Hawaii twice. I did Mexico last year and this year. Well, in 2025, this year so far, we've done, we went up to Monterey. We did Tehachapi. We did this trip.
We did... Oh, we went to Jawbone. We went to Jawbone with my baby daddy and my son. We did like a little cutesy desert off-road adventure.
fucking insane dude you do not make enough money for this i know you make literally two thousand two hundred dollars a month i know i know in california you make twenty six thousand four hundred dollars a year yeah this is what our child tax credit's funding another the child tax credit funded my car but another yes but you couldn't afford a car because you went on vacation so in reality it funded your vacations yeah the car was more of a need than the vacations you
to buy the car without a tax credit if you weren't going on vacation but because you spent all your money on vacations you used the tax credit to get a car do you see how that works yeah okay I don't know why that was so complicated
They're telling me you could have used your mom's car. I did. For the vacation. Well, I don't like to use her car. I had already been using her car. This is what the rush was for to get a car earlier this year. I was tired of using my mom's car, and I had the Monterey trip planned for my boy. You live in the same house as your mom? Yeah, together but separate. And you have this much debt? Yeah. What? But none.
No, it's not like we're roommates. It's two houses in one. But it's so cheaper. It's a duplex. I get it. No, it's not. But it's so cheap. Yeah, yeah. All right. It's cheap for me. Yeah, I paid $350.
What the fuck is your life? Oh, and then, oh my, why are we even, why are we enabling you? No, no, no, we're not enabling. Why are we enabling you as a nation and as in a culture? No. We need to let you fucking get to the bottom of the barrel so you can wake up and actually fucking grind some shit out and be an adult for the first time in your life. I'm growing up. You're 40 and you're acting like a child. I'm getting there. This is a joke. Yeah, yeah.
This is a joke. My baby daddy called me Peter Pan for like a really long time. Because he's a pedophile? What? No, because I'm like a child that won't grow up. I don't know. No, because I'm like stuck in childhood in the land of no responsibility. And this is not cute and you have a lot of responsibilities. So what are you talking about? I know, but I'm... You have a child. You're a mother. This is step one in the growing up, you know, getting out of the bear. You're free! Almost. I'll be 38 on Christmas Eve.
Are you ever going to not live with your mom as a four-year-old? No, I think when she dies, we're going to Airbnb that part of the house. She owns it? Yeah, she bought it straight out.
So the rent that my boyfriend and I paid is just for like the property. So he has moved in. No, even when he was not living there, he still was paying $200. Oh, you were being so enabled and coddled and oh my f***er. I know. I hate your existence. I know. I have basically... I just hate everything around your life. I don't hate you as a person. I hate everything around your life because it's just supported your horrible behavior. I have spent my life just kind of like floating through...
He doesn't remember of any... Someone had to call the cops. That was either my mom or my best friend. What did she say happened? Or is she an alcoholic as well? No, she's not. She was just nervous. She was scared about like the fighting and the yelling that was going on. Which is, you know. Yeah. A mother. Yes. You. Oh, I am one of those people.
Kind of. Okay, $1,900 on this U.S. bank account. Okay, so that one... $40 minimum fee payment, what? That one is... It's interest-free, right? Yeah, I opened it so that I could move from Capital One... I don't know why you're putting extra on an interest-free card instead of a f***ing card that is accruing interest. You put extra on this card. What do you mean I put extra? You put more than the minimum fee payment on this card when there's other cards that are accruing interest. Because this... Is it deferred interest? This...
January 2026. So I'm paying that one off before January 2026. Yeah, but it doesn't defer interest. Interest just starts accruing on the balance that happened. Why'd you even open this then? Because I wanted to move the balance. Well, ChatGPT had the idea. So if I open the zero interest one and move part of my balance over there, and then I pay that one off, which I'm on track to pay that one off by January 2026.
You see? That one's good. That's a good one. You're going to make it, I promise. I don't know if you're going to make it into your 50s, but I'll at least make it through this episode. Before I used to pay this off, listen, the thing is,
Yeah, pay off the cards that accrue an interest. This isn't deferred interest, so whatever balance it is by the time interest starts, it'll accrue at that balance, not at the balance it is today, and you're not getting backwards punished. There's other cards that nearly 30% interest attack those. Or if you want to do snowball in order to whack out minimum payments, yeah, you can attack this first, but it looked like you were trying to do avalanche method, which is highest interest rate. I don't know what that means. Snowball method. I'm not a David Ramsey, girly. I'm just f***ing with you. Go on. Sorry.
Snowball. So you do know it, though. I don't know Avalanche. I'm vaguely familiar with Snowball. What is Snowball? Tell me. Littlest to biggest. Avalanche is highest interest rate to lowest interest rate. Oh, okay. Which is kind of what you're doing. So I assume we were doing that. Oh, no, no. What are you doing? I mean, ChatGPT didn't mention any of those. What did ChatGPT tell you to do? To pay that one off first. So Snowball.
Why are you putting extra money to the other cards then? Did Chet GPT tell you to? No, I've been doing that. Is that a problem? It is.
I thought it would be stupid to just make the minimum because half the time that doesn't even cover the interest. It doesn't, but the snowball method is to unlock the minimum monthly payments that you are putting towards the USA Bank. You take the US Bank first, you kill it quick without putting any money extra towards other banks. By the way, no method suggests spending on credit cards, which you did on the first one, so fuck off. But either way...
then you take this $40 minimum monthly payment and you roll that into the next debt. Then you take that minimum monthly payment and roll it into the next debt. That's how you do it. No financial person recommends putting more on other cards. You either attack the highest interest rate one or you attack the lowest balance one. Those are the two strategies. Technically, Avalanche will pay it off quicker, but a lot of people find a higher success rate doing Snowball because you get quicker psychological wins.
And I'd rather get there, have a higher chance of getting there, than getting there quicker at a lower chance. Okay. Makes sense. You've paid, this must be balance transfer fees, I hope. Yeah. $66, or hopefully we haven't had late, have we? I've never had a late payment, no. Okay, I don't know why they're asking me this, but they want me to ask you, and this is going to fucking murder me. What does Chad GPT think about you buying timeshares?
Okay, that was a long time ago. That was before ChatGPT and I became homies. Do you have it now still? No, no, no, no.
You're obviously not a credit card person, dude. I mean, this is just absolutely ridiculous. And yeah, there's no deferred and it ends in January 2036. But use the Fizz card. It's a debit card that builds credit. I already told you I'll connect you with therapy, but I'll also get you a course career certification if you ever decide you want to actually have a career at some point. So, but doubt it. Okay, so what's this? What am I looking at?
I needed a new laptop. What am I looking at? What is the service? What do you mean? It's either eBay. Oh, it's either Affirm or Afterpay. It's Affirm. Okay, thank you. Because I saw Afterpay next. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. My gosh. I don't know why that was difficult. So you affirmed a... A $100 refurbished laptop. I didn't go crazy. Yeah, but is that going to last? I don't use it for much. I use it for...
planning vacations because that's like big screen activity you know you have nothing going for you in life this is a sad existence this is a sad existence i'm not sad like i'm not sad you will be it's a problem for later it's also a problem for your kid i don't think it's a problem for him at all what do you mean
He's going to have to defer everything to take care of you. He's really not though. I would never put that on him. No, it's not you doing it intentionally. It's that you did it via your choices still though.
Well, now I have a real job, so I'm contributing to retirement again. Anytime that I've had a job on paper, I've contributed to retirement. True retirement's nothing. It wouldn't even let you survive for a year. Well, I'm not retiring tomorrow. Yeah, but you're not that far off either. You're literally 12 years away from being able to take away money from a tax advantage account without early retirement penalties. I'm not doing all that.
I'm not doing all that. Yeah, why would you do things that are good for you? Again, the kid will have to take care of you because you're either ignorant or you're just, you don't give a fuck. You don't think he would, but your kid is not going to set aside and they're not just going to let their mom die out in the wilderness. I'm not going to be alone in the wilderness. I'm going to have my boyfriend who will be my husband by then. Based on your history, I don't know. Since you guys leave each other constantly, all relationships you've been in. No, no, no, not all of them. So good luck with that. It doesn't sound like you're the most consistent person.
Okay. Huh? Yeah, I don't think I'd describe myself as consistent either. Exactly, and I need to actually tell you this because people have probably babied your entire life. You are a failure. No. Yes. No. Failure adjacent. The only reason you're surviving is because your mother has purchased the house and is giving you subsidized rent. No, I would have found a mother. Yes, no, doubt it. You're not willing to work.
If I was forced, then I'm sure I would have made it work. Let's see what Jack GPT says about this. I'm not suited for the homeless life. Hush now. Dude, you look homeless. Hush now. I do. Jack GPT, what would you say about...
A girl having her ex-boyfriend move into her house now that they're technically back together and they were alcoholics together, enabling their bad behavior when they lived together. And there was a domestic abuse situation where she got arrested and drained her entire savings to get her out of jail because she hit her husband. And the only reason they're able to survive in their house is because their mother subsidized her because her mom has actually done a little bit of work in her life to actually set herself up for success, unlike this girl. Is she going to be nice to me?
Doubt it. Look at your entire life. This situation clearly reflects deep-rooted financial irresponsibility, ongoing unhealthy behaviors, and enabling dynamic that is likely to repeat or worsen. So...
You're enabling each other unhealthily. Financial mismanagement unlimited. Dependency on external support. Yeah, because you're incapable of being an adult. Yes, we know that. You need to set firm boundaries, professional intervention if necessary, and take financial accountability. Nope, nope, nope. Okay, great. So good luck.
I do have pretty good luck. Like things do tend to just like. No, you don't. Your life is not good. It's not bad. It's bad. Like that is bad. Your life is only, you're not, you're only not on the streets because of your mom. Yeah. That's bad. Oh my God. But I mean, if it wasn't her, it would be some, I would be fine without her. I would have found an alternate. There's nothing to suggest that.
You're nothing but a disaster. Yeah. There's nothing to suggest that. I would have been fine. Your existence is horrendous. Everything you've done has been a joke. You wouldn't have survived. I don't see how. This is just like one part of life, though. The rest of my life is pretty good. Shut the f*** up. Bye, I belong, you know? Okay, well, you owe $81.77 left on this. You make minimum payments of $27.26. Okay, so...
I don't know. It's going to be really sad when you come on the follow-up show and someone relapsed. No, that's not going to happen. I hope not, but it's been six months and you already said how you have before. I'm not worried about me. I mean, I'm not worried about him either. No, the two of us together especially, we do not know. There will be no drinking. There's no, it's a big no. It's been six months. I know how many months it's been. I'm not rooting for it, obviously. I'm just like, look how you've lived your life.
You've already had beers. You said you've had one-off beers. I have. You're just one f***ing little slip away. You are so close. You are teetering on the edge. And then you're bringing in an enabler into your house to live with you full-time? Dude, I don't know, man.
Afterpay. We're purchasing on what? $42.70 a purchase is what? The Afterpay, I looked and it is like exclusively... Sheen! Ulta Beauty! Sheen! Sheen! It's not really going to work, is it? It's just those two only because I need those things. Listen, that's clearly like $2 lipstick from the party store. No, no, I made this. So I don't know what we're doing. I made it.
Over the past year and a half, my team and I have worked with experts to create the literal best for financial education programs on the entire internet. And even with a full month for a money back guarantee, we have the lowest refund rate in the entire industry by far. So I'll teach you how to budget no matter where you are in life, how you should be investing based on your investing profile, and how to get into real estate for the very first time online.
or grow a massive rental property empire like I have in my own life. And I can also teach you how to get out of bad debt, but also utilize good debt to your advantage. And each of these is available individually in the education section in the description below. But at the top of that section, you can also bundle all
four of them together for 15% off. So join the over 10,000 people who have gone through my educational programs and have changed their lives. And to learn more, just go to calebhammer.com or just click those links in the description below. Have you drank on this trip yet? This is a little trip. No, no, no, no, no. Good. No.
We talk about that all the time when we're on vacation and we see bars and stuff. We always ask, how many beers deep do you think we'd be by now? Sounds like a very healthy relationship. It is! Okay, I have a note from you. If you were to ask him, my baby daddy would probably tell you I owe him $15,000 for the surgeries because I did do the super cliche thing of breaking up with him.
Like a month after surgery, we had been together for almost 12 years. Trust me, fam, I earned that 15K in those 12 years with him. Ha ha ha. I did, yeah. What, for dating him? What do you mean? For just...
Putting up with him not sticking it in? That wears on a girl, okay? It does. It f***s with you psychologically. It really does. It sucks to be turned down all the time. And you know that other people want to have sex with you, but the one person that you want to have sex with you doesn't want to have sex with you, and it sucks. That was just the main one. So he owes you $15,000 for that? No, he don't owe me anything. It's already done. You said you made it.
You made what? The $15,000 from him not f***ing you. That was the cost of the brachioplasty and abdominoplasty. You said you don't owe him back because you made... I don't owe him that. Trust me, I earned $15,000 in those 12 years with him. Yeah. Because he didn't diddle? Among other things. He's also one of those that's like, I don't know how to do dishes. Like he's one of... I did a lot. Paper plates. What about the environment? I'm just f***ing with you. I like paper plates a lot. Damn right. Um...
No, he's, listen, we just are very, we're not well suited for each other romantically. He's a wonderful father. We're just like, I'm too much for him. He's real like, he does. Does he f*** her? I've asked. He said everything seems to be going fine in that regard. But that's him saying that. Maybe it's because you're a crazy drunk who smears f*** out people's cars. No, no, no. And gets them fired from their jobs by sending titties to everyone. Well. Yeah, I think it might be a little bit on you.
Come on, you're crazy. We know this. Yeah. He got kicked out of a f***ing concert. Yeah. But that one too, like, Garth Brooks, he's very, like, sentimental and he likes to, like, do the mushy stuff with the fans and stuff. Did you guys ever get arrested together, you and Baby Daddy? No, he, no, no, no, not together. You're the crazy one. No. But he's been, he's been arrested. Oh my gosh, what is happening in that town? I know. I don't know.
Well, these little mountain towns, there's like not a lot to do besides drink. Move. I know. I don't want to move yet. I'm going to stay at least until my son's done with high school and then I can spread my wings.
Oh, another note. What's that? Oh, I think I do also owe my DUI program like $100, but I keep forgetting to call out. I think because I missed a couple. So you're a part of a DUI program. Now, okay, I did get a DUI in 2018, but I didn't start taking care. I know, I didn't start taking care of it until 2023. What a mother. Well, that was a long time ago. It was a long time ago.
We all make mistakes, but my gosh, this amount of stacking is f***ing crazy. And still with what you're doing now and your mindset on things, I'm not feeling great. I feel great. I feel good. I don't feel bad. So...
You could just add that to the list. Yeah, I'm going to add it. How many DUIs have you had? Two. Oh my f***, why? One was in 2012 on me and my baby daddy's first date. Dude, what the f***? He should have probably f***ing ran then. What is wrong with you? I know, his sister came and picked me up. That was the first time she met me. We're like besties, it's fine. And then the second one was 2018. But I didn't start, I didn't like, I just did nothing until 2023. Yeah.
And now I'm almost done because it's like an 18-month program. Oh, my gosh. I don't know. JackGBT hasn't fucking just, like, told you to shut the fuck up and, like...
No, he's really nice to me. Like too nice, I think. Yeah, you got enabled from your ex now current boyfriend. And now you're being enabled by GPT. I've been enabled like my whole life pretty much. Okay, student loans. Oh my gosh, how much? Oh boy. Wait, how much in student loans? Oh, that's the big one. $68,768 student loans at 40? How? Because I've never made a single payment in my life.
They can garnish your wages. And this administration is not friendly to people who don't pay student loans. Okay, well, hear me out. So I asked... Yeah, I guess. I'll attempt to hear you out. I asked my buddy, ChatGPT, what to fucking do. And he guided me through, okay? And what did he guide you to? And I signed up for the income-driven repayment thing. And so I...
I don't know, like two months ago. Okay. Okay. And so I pay zero. I pay zero. You guys like this? You guys like this? I know. I know it's bad. Here's the fact. Here's the fact. I'm not against social programs at all because we all pay into it. So you get unemployment if you get unemployed. Whatever. That's fine. Some people need help as well. Okay. That's fine. Maybe some people can't pay the student loans for different reasons. She is actively choosing to not make money.
Because she does not want to work. She is actively choosing to not make money. And then she's able to not pay her student loans by saying, I'm not making enough money when she is choosing that. What a joke this is. Why are we enabling her?
Why are we enabling her? She gets her fucking child tax credit and chooses not to work. And now she doesn't have to pay on her student loans because she's choosing not to work. What a joke. I swear you were going to turn me into someone that just wants to, you're going to turn me into the, what was his name? I don't even know. Well, I don't, I don't know, but I just want to just end everything because you guys, you're crazy. Don't actually need help. And then you ruin it.
I did what ChatGPT told me to do. Yes, but the fact that you're able to is a joke. Hey, that's not my problem. I didn't make the rules. No, it's all of our problem. That's the bad thing. Well, I mean, like I said. I'm not a consultant.
Like you said, the current administration is like cracking down or whatever. Yes, but you're on it. We'll see. I don't know. The head of the Department of Education might be like, you know what? We're not doing this anymore after they see the show. If you see the show, please kick her off of it because she does not deserve it. She should be forced and garnished. She should actually learn consequences of her actions. I can't believe I'm even saying that, but...
Whatever. It's just, it's so stupid that you're even allowed to do this. You specifically. Yeah, my baby daddy shows the same. Drink it all away and then f***ing here we go. Okay. So how long were you in school? Oh my God, forever. I changed my major like a bunch. Great, so we enable that as well. Good job, society. I finally graduated in 2018. I was going to be a teacher, but then I realized I f***ing hate kids. Well, when did you go to school? I don't know. Forever. I started like, I don't know. I was probably...
How long were you in school? I'm thinking. Like off and on, probably from the time I was like 20 to however old I was in 2018. So if we're in 20... So like 10 years? So like 30. Yeah, probably like 10 years. You were in school for 10 years and now you don't even have to pay back because you refuse to work. Yeah. And the thing with that is like I was bad. I would just take out the maximum amount every time, even if like I didn't need it. And just, you know...
do whatever I wanted with it. But that was a long time ago. It is a lot of money for a degree that I don't do anything with, you know. What was your degree? Liberal Arts.
Because I was going to be a teacher. Because I was going to be a teacher. And I... You were going to be in a classroom? No, I know. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. I know, right? So I quit my job at the casino with the intention of subbing for a year before going to get my certification. But then the world shut down and I didn't have that opportunity. Thank God. Good. Yeah. I wouldn't want you anywhere near a classroom. I mean, I could still sub if I wanted. No. No.
Not after they see this. I don't know how your kid has made it. He's the best. He wins the spelling bee. He has won the spelling bee every year. He's one staying alive in spite. He's a good egg, that one. He is going to be resilient, let me tell you. He's well-traveled. That too. So that was like one of the... That part's fun, but just doing fun things and destroying our life financially isn't what will result in a healthy life. No. No.
I suppose not. Suppose not. But see, with the travel, okay, but with the travel too, like his dad. So you're paying him zero dollars? For the next 12 months. Such a joke. Such a fucking joke. And the only reason I knew anything was going to rise because my credit score went from like 720 to like 513 or something asinine. And I realized it was because the student loan started reporting. So then that's when I asked ChatGPT for help.
Gosh, the people that come on the show like you, it just makes me look like the most conservative person. I promise. I mean, we don't do politics, but I promise I am pretty neutral down the middle. I'm right on issues. I'm left on issues. I just try to go where the facts are, and I will change my opinion every day, any day, whenever new information comes out. But my goodness, people like you? What a joke. You make me understand the old white people that are like, meh.
This is what I mean by I've kind of just been able to float through on luck and vibes. It's not luck, it's by the support of all of us. Because you would have been having to pay on these student loans. They would have been garnishing you wages. We wouldn't be giving you money just because you have a kid. If I make the payments on time for 15 years or something, then it all goes away. If they continue to allow that, we'll see.
I'm not knocking on wood for you, girl. I didn't ask you to. You should have to actually have at least one piece of responsibility in your life. One. I do. Your mom funds your living situation. You don't have to pay any student loans and you get my taxes because you birthed a child. Yeah. But again, I'm not even against the child tax credit, but look how you're using it. You're using it to travel. Now to take care of the fucking kid. Oh my God, I need the car.
I'm not going to get us out of school. You could have afforded the car if you weren't traveling. It is the mathematical way it works. Okay, we went through that. Exactly. So I don't know why the fuck you're bringing it up. $250 in a checking account, $255 in a savings account. Okay. Our checking account went down. Well, yeah. Well, yeah. It's like a paycheck to paycheck. By choice, because look at this. Look at this, ladies and gentlemen. Ladies and fucking gentlemen, look at that mess!
Two pages of that. But at least it's all in the- Shut the f*** up. Jack in the Box, Fortnite, Appleville, Sporting Goods, Afterpay, Stone's Throw, Maz, Jumba Juice, DoorDashing, Denny's. F***ing DoorDashing, Denny's. Oh, that was for my mom. Afterpay, Amazon, Afterpay, DoorDash, Amazon, Amazon, Taco Bell, McDonald's, McDonald's, Afterpay, DoorDashing, The Burger. F***.
You! Not even giving him nutritious meals. Going.com. Because it's late on the baseball league. I was in wireless. Shut the f***. Xander's something. Amazon. Microsoft. Fortnite again! That's fun! I don't give a f***. Get his money. You don't have a lady. Yeah. I'm not paying taxes so he can get Fortnite. Is that two Fortnites in one month? Yes. I am paying for his skins.
Instead of being able to hire more employees, I am funding your son's Fortnite skins. He appreciate it. Apple bill, Venmo-ing out money, Etsy, Zelling out money, Apple bill, Zelling out money, Verizon, Zelling out money, Apple bill, Apple bill. Savings $161. What a joke. Monthly maintenance fee because you don't have enough in there. What a disgusting joke. Pull up your phone.
Pull up your damn stupid phone. For what? Which do you want? For whatever I want. Okay. You look a lot younger in your profile picture. What profile picture? Oh, my Apple one?
was younger that was at a time yeah chat gpt period tracker icloud plus moon x moon over the something i got rid of that peak peak pro text art and youtube premium those are old as yeah well some of them are expiring but you just paid for them recently so narwhal for reddit what the f is that they used to be a big thing wasn't it expired just basically last year so let me look at your amazon
Okay, the Amazon my mom and I share. So some of them are hers and some of them... Meow mix. That's her. Shampoo bar. That's her. A lock. Oh, that was me. I ended up not even needing it. Sport tampons. That's me. Men's underwear. Oh, I got those from my boyfriend. Sorry. Great, because... No, I was talking about...
looking at his old nasty underwear he needed new underwear so I got him underwear and socks I've been getting nagged at too to get new underwear I get it see I get it I guess I understand derma rollers oh that's me what are you trans no I'm gonna start rolling my scalp with my Indian pharmaceuticals so that I can grow my hair more uh Keurig that's her
Lots of sprays and just lots of cat things. She's got cats. I mean, I got cats too. Yeah, apparently a thousand of them. My goodness. Boots. Boots? Boots. That's gotta be her. Boots.
Okay, this isn't the worst, but there's definitely some bull in there and we have an expensive cat litter self-cleaning thing in the cart. $229. That's going to be for her. She can't be trusted to clean up after herself. Great, so she should have cats. Trust me, I know. What a responsible pair we have here. And then you said there was retirement? Where's this retirement? Do you want it on here?
I don't know. Well, I don't know. What's your retirement? Just tell me. It's from when I used to work at a casino, two casinos. Yeah, you can pull it up if you want. I'm going to try. Oh, there's more than I thought. Here you go. Okay. We are in RBC Wealth Management. Not sure.
$29,000, okay. Where should you be right now? In three years, you should be at approximately $80,000. So you're dramatically behind. And that's just for having a chance at retirement. Honestly, that's not going to be good enough, obviously. But that's because your income is low. Why we have it low at $80,000. You need to be making money. You need to be making money.
I put 10% away of my check right now. They just barely let me start contributing. Honestly, I would just take the match until you pay off this debt because still, even with the best returns. I don't have a match. Then you shouldn't be investing in anything. You should be paying off 30% debt because you're not going to beat that in the market. Let me see what you're invested in. That's just whatever the man, the financial man. I let him do his thing.
I use the same guy that my parents. You're using a guy for $30,000? I'm grandfathered under my parents. You're in some mutual funds, which who knows what the f***ing fees are on this s***. I have no idea about any of that. Why? I took my 401ks from my old jobs and I put them there with that guy because I figured he did all right for my parents. What guy? I don't know. His name's Frank. Oh, for f*** sake. F*** Frank.
He's a very nice elderly gentleman. Yeah, he's making money from you. You do not need someone to personally manage $30,000. If we're talking a couple million, then we can have a conversation because you can get some tax savings and whatnot. Are you saying I should take that out and put it elsewhere? Or what? Well, the thing is, I don't know if... Well, you're going to want to trade in the account, so you're still going to have to pay capital gains. Well, I don't want you to face withdrawal penalties, but I would definitely get out of an actively managed account, that's for sure.
And then I also have, I got sucked into like the whole GameStop thing. So I do have $1,500 in GameStop. Take it out. Well, what's it invested in? Is it just a random brokerage? Fidelity. Okay, but what kind of accounts in there? Just individual accounts, is it no? Is it a Roth IRA? You're going to have to look.
I think it's just like a day trading. Okay, it's an individual account. Sell it, get out. Use that money, put it towards debt. Shut the fuck up. You have 30% debt. I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. But my hands are made of diamonds. Shut the fuck up. I'm sure this guy's taking a percentage of your earnings. He has probably a fee. Let's see what these mutual fund fees have. Is this his mutual fund? Does he have a mutual fund of his own? I don't know. I don't even know what you're asking me.
You have available cash, $15,000. Listen, of the $29,000 that's in there, half of it's not even invested. You're kidding. Nope, no jokes were made. Oh, that's not good. Not great. So can I move that money without penalty? You need to talk to him. Can you move it around and about? You need to talk to him. Okay. Why would it not be? Why would it just be sitting there not invested? I don't know. Its net expense ratio is 1.12% a year. What does that mean? You're losing 1.12% a year. Oh, f***.
Well, that's silly goose behavior. So you get a return of even 10%, which is the S&P 500. Then all of a sudden you're losing 1% of that. It's so stupid. This is so stupid. Why are you trusting this guy? Why are you using a financial investment of $30,000 with half of it invested? I just went along with whatever my parents were doing. Frank, are you hearing this? Frank? Yeah, Frank. Fuck off. He's very nice. He's nice because he's making money off of you. That tracks. He's a salesman. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. But if I do it myself, I'm going to end up putting in the GameStop. Oh, then maybe it's better with Frank. I don't know. Pay the fee for you being a moron. I guess it makes sense. The silly goose tax. Not a silly goose, you're a joke. I know that's insulting, but I'm not going to let you go away and think that you're actually just being cute. You're not. This is embarrassing. Your existence is embarrassing right now. How you are living your life is embarrassing.
I'm having an okay time. By the way, the expense ratio, for example, SPY is, instead of 1 point whatever the other one was, 0.09. Okay. So dramatically less. Dramatically less. Or for example, VOO, Vanguard's 0.03. Why pay these expenses? All right.
No, it's so stupid. And I guarantee you, mutual funds rarely beat the S&P 500. It's like something like 20% due. Then why did he pick that? Why did he pick mutual funds? I think that's his own actively managed fund. I don't know for sure. I don't know Frank. I don't know what he's doing. So you think, okay, get rid of the GameStop and do what with it? Put it on a credit card? Or put it towards a credit card? Yeah. Your minimum monthly payment debt totals...
are $269.26 a year. What is your rent? $350. What about utilities? So the gas, it varies. Come on, average utilities. Let's say $70 a month.
Including the internet? No, no, no. That's the gas. Okay, so I pay for the gas. Hold on. I pay for the gas and the trash. She pays for the internet and the electric. How much is gas and trash? The trash is $160 every three months. Okay, $160 divided by three plus $70. Your utilities are $134 a month. Okay, great. Got it. Phone bill? Oh, $160. Okay.
I know, I'm going to get a different, I know. I know, I just paid my phone off. It's paid off, so now I can switch to another. You can use any of them. We like Helium because he uses T-Mobile towers. And I use T-Mobile, so. And if I was on a budget, I would switch to Helium. But do you owe your phone? No, I just paid it off. Like, just paid it off. So you'll switch to that. I'm going to switch. Okay, I'll put it in 30 bucks a month. One line, just one. You don't need your kid to have a line, right? No, no, no. He's on his dad's. Okay, good. Yeah, sounds like that's why your kid's surviving. Okay, gas, room, from, drive, drive. How much? Uh, like...
Probably like $200. You don't have a car payment, do you? No. Okay, what's your car insurance? $133. How do you have a paid off car? Because I bought it off Facebook Marketplace. That's right, because you got a loan from your ex-baby daddy because you've never been able to do anything on your own. That's correct. That is correct. So you only have the kid half the time? Yeah, basically. How do groceries work in the house with mama involved? Listen to me. Are you guys fully... Yes. I'm just... Oh, I'm checking because I need a budget. No, we do not... Hush now. Hush now.
groceries $450 should be able to do you and the kid meal prep I don't care use our budget friendly cookbook you guys get the signed version if you take the annual version of our budgeting app TP fund I'll give $150 anything you and the kid need extra like the sports tampons shove them in his butt whatever you gotta do okay medical health care anything anything co-pays what's your health insurance situation I'm on poor people insurance by choice yeah by choice what do you mean by choice
You're choosing to be poor because you're not working? Yes, by choice. So f*** off. Why are we enabling that? I don't know. I think the threshold's pretty high in California to be on that insurance. Because I have me and my son on that insurance. And that's going to f*** everything up. If I do start working more, I probably... Good, be responsible for your own bills. Well, he would have to go on his dad's insurance. Don't rely on the taxpayer. What a joke. Just so you don't have to work, f*** off. Oh my God, that's not why I don't want to work. What a nasty joke.
So nothing, no co-pays, no nothing? No, no, no. Okay, Jim? No. I'll give you $40 of subscriptions. You choose where it goes. How many pets you got? I have two cats and then one. Health and age? One is a baby. One was born February 10th. And the other one is like five. Okay, get them both pet insurance. But there's going to be a dog when my boyfriend moves back in too. Age, health? He was born January. He's a year and some months. Health?
Unfortunately, very good. Good. Okay. You don't like it? I don't. I never didn't want a dog. I didn't want a dog. Why? They actually do things and have personalities. He's definitely got personality. Okay. $150 for pet insurance. Okay. How much for pet food on a monthly basis? Probably like 60. If you put both of them together, 60. Cat and dog, 60. Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not taken into account? Let me think. Okay.
I mean, it's not like monthly. It's probably more like every three months. I do like to make big purchases on the Chinese gray market. No, you don't. That's gone. That's canceled. That's like a... Don't give a f***. You're prioritizing life. Listen, you don't have much wiggle room. I just... No, you don't. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. $1,966.26. That's how much you need to survive. You are lucky you have wiggle room. It's all because other people enable you. 300 or...
You have $233.74 left. Student loans, I'm going to take that out of account for not what? But that's only making the minimum monthly payments, right? Yes. I don't do that. I make more. Shut the fuck up. We're budgeting. Okay. Your minimum required. And then we're deciding where the rest of your money goes. What the fuck are you? A mess. $92,386. By choice. And it's not cute.
Let's get rid of the student loans for now. We'll figure that out once you have to start making payments, and then I'll just do a traditional payment plan or income-driven, if that still exists by that point. $23,600 to... $23...
No, we're minimizing the baby daddy debt, I guess, right? No, no, that's not real. Yeah. Okay, so $8,618.54 of bad debt divided by your extra $2.33. That's it. You have no respect for the dollar because you've just been enabled your entire life and then we've paid for you. What a joke you are. Oh, I'm disgusted. It takes three years to pay off your debt. Good luck. I'm disgusted I'm ending it. That's not bad. I'm disgusted I'm ending it. Oh.
It's not bad. It's not bad. How is it not bad? Three years is not bad. Like, that's really doable. Three years if you budget off of nothing, which is what I gave you. But I'm going to have another human in the house with me. I'm going to have my boyfriend with me, and that's going to be helpful. Yeah, until not again. That's not good enough. Yeah, it's only happened historically throughout your entire life. What the f*** are you talking about?
You're not cute. You're not funny. You're disgusting. And you have a child that you need to take care of. You're a mother. I take great care of him. No, you don't. I do. No. He exists because of your baby daddy. And his parents have means.
You're a joke. You go to jail. You get DUIs. You smear poop. You get people fired. You do revenge. You just go on vacations. You don't work. You suck the tit of the taxpayer on multiple fronts. You are a joke.
You are a joke and I'm not going to let you think you're a good person. I'm not going to let you think that you are cute or funny. I'm going to tell you how it is, even if it is mean, even if it is brutal, because I cannot have you walking around thinking you are something more than you are. You need to change this. You need to change your behavior. You need to change your life because it's embarrassing and it sucks for the rest of the people around you.
So 0 out of 10.
I'm surprised you don't have collections. I don't know how the timeshare didn't go in collections. That just kind of went, nuh-nuh.
I think it's some weird like real estate like loophole thing. What? The timeshare. You just stopped paying? Because I stopped paying on my half altogether. He paid his half off. Eventually. They did send a few like... I hope it's in collections. I hate timeshares, but you deserve it. I look all the time. Emergency fund, nothing, zero out of ten. Retirement, you're behind by...
A few years. What was in it? It was like 30? Yeah. Yeah, 30. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, about a 3 out of 10 there. Real estate, 0 out of 10. Timeshare don't count. No, no, no, no. No, no. No, it don't. Hammer Financial Score, 1 out of 10. Join us in the post- It went up!
Shut the fuck up. Join us in the post show. I'm going to somehow survive that extra 20 minutes of the show. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. What? I have all the screenshots. Yes, you do. Am I allowed to? Yeah. Oh. Because this is good drama. He says, oh, fuck.
He was drunk. He was ready to f*** her. You can call him and confront him. You were totally going to f*** Leifler named f***ing, weren't you? No, hell no. What are you talking about? Buddy, you proposed to meet up with her. Oh, her face is in this one. It's this image, ladies and gentlemen. Exclusive members content. Click the link in the description or pin comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.