Putin & Kim Jong-un’s Dictator Hang | Ebon Moss-Bachrach
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You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your hosts, Desi Lydic and Ronny Chieng. Desi Lydic. And I'm Ronny Chieng. And I'm Desi Lydic. And I'm Ronny Chieng. And I'm Desi Lydic. And I'm Ronny Chieng. And I'm Ronny Chieng. And I'm Desi Lydic. Ha! Let's get into the headlines. Woo!

Let's kick things off with some major international news. You know when you're in middle school and your two worst enemies have a sleepover and spend the whole night talking shit about you? Well, that just happened to America. Tonight, two of America's fiercest adversaries together on North Korean soil. Vladimir Putin arriving in Pyongyang for the first time in nearly a quarter of a year.

a quarter of a century. North Korea's Kim Jong-un pulling out all the stops in an elaborately choreographed state visit for Russian President Vladimir Putin. The outcast and sanctioned leaders side by side reviewing troops, cheered by crowds of children with balloons. The two unveiled a strategic defense treaty promising mutual assistance in case either country faces aggression. Best friends forever!

Russia and North Korea, it's the perfect alliance. They go together like vodka and famine. Everyone wins. I mean, Russia gets North Korean weapons and North Korea gets whatever Putin has, those nesting dolls and Tucker Carlson's phone number. I don't know. And now that Russia has North Korean weapons, watch out, Ukraine. Get ready for some missiles that blow up on the launching pads.

But my favorite part about this visit was just getting to watch two dictators hang out together. Because when Putin first landed, they were all formal and polite with each other. I mean, look at them, trying to get the other to get into the limo first. "No, go! No, no! After you! I insist!" It's friendly, but it's also obvious that these guys have blown up a lot of cars.

No, no, no, no. You start the ignition. No, no, no. You do it. No, you do it. Okay, fine. We'll both turn it at the same time. But over the next couple of days, the two had a lot of fun together. Kim picked him up, and they took a drive. Just two communists in cars.

getting coffee. They drove through a botanic garden. They looked like they adopted a couple of dogs together. And clearly, Putin had a great time, because when he left, he looked really sad. He hugged Kim goodbye, and then he stood there waving way too long. And then he went inside the plane and waved from the window. Can you at least act like you have another friend? All right?

It looks like you're waving to your mom on the bus to the sleepaway camp. Also, based on Kim Jong-un's face, Putin must have been a pretty high-maintenance guest. Just look at him.

Come back soon. Oh, God. I thought he'd never leave. Next time, he stays at the Radisson. Let's move on to climate change. If you couldn't tell from all the sweat on your ass cheeks today, the Earth is still getting hotter. So climate activists have taken their protests to the next obvious place, a pile of rocks. A pair of climate protesters have been arrested after spray-painting the historic Stonehenge Monument in southern England.

Video of the incident shows two people running toward the stone circle while spraying orange paint. A third person can be seen trying to stop them, then a fourth. The climate activist group Just Stop Oil has taken responsibility for the incident.

Whoa, guys, I appreciate the cause, but what did Stonehenge ever do? I mean, literally, what did Stonehenge do? I get the stone part, but what the is a henge? Regardless, I don't think this helps the cause. All they did was make it look like Stonehenge went to town on some Doritos. Guys, these stunts don't work. I promise you, Exxon saw this and thought, "That's a good point. I wonder if there's oil under Stonehenge."

Yeah, I don't think painting Stonehenge orange is gonna do anything, guys, okay? Last year, the sky in New York turned orange, and we still didn't care, okay? Everybody was like, oh, that's weird. Let's turn up the air conditioning. Yeah, I'll tell you who they should be going after. Billionaires and their private jets.

Two more members of the organization Just Stop Oil have been placed under arrest for spray painting private jets and Taylor Swift might have been a target. No, no, not Taylor. She is another billionaire. Just Stop Oil said that the airfield is where Taylor Swift's jet was parked, but Essex police in the United Kingdom said the pop star's aircraft was not at the airport. Oh, thank God Taylor doesn't have to fly commercial.

But guys, spray paint is not gonna ground these planes, okay? You gotta do something radical, like cut some wires or install some Boeing pods.

Finally, some major education news from Louisiana, where schoolchildren are getting a lesson from the greatest textbook ever. New this morning, the governor of Louisiana signed a law requiring the Ten Commandments be posted in all public school classrooms. The only state now with such a law. It mandates poster-size displays of the Ten Commandments in large, easily readable font. This is in all public classrooms. This is from kindergarten up until state football.

funded universities. Easily readable font? I hate to break it to you, but Louisiana ranks 38th in reading. I don't think the font is going to help. See, I can make that joke because I'm from Kentucky. We're ranked 32nd. Louisiana, we read gooder. For more on Louisiana's new Ten Commandments law and what it means for the separation of church and state, we go live to Louisiana with Michael Kosta.

Michael, how can Republicans justify religion in public schools? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. The Ten Commandments aren't religion, all right? Just because they're in the Bible doesn't mean they're religious, okay? The Ten Commandments are universal moral principles that these Louisiana Republicans want everybody to live by, just like their party does. So they live up to these same moral standards? Yeah, of course. It's not that hard. Like, you know, thou shalt not kill.

Pretty cut and dry. Don't kill anybody. Unless you're standing on your ground, you've got to protect yourself. Or if a protester's blocking traffic, I've got places I've got to... You know what? Let's forget about this one. It's complicated, so... But look, the rest of these, the rest of these are clear-cut. Sure, sure. Like, thou shall not commit adultery. Yes. Well, obviously not if it's a porn star and your wife is pregnant. I mean...

God is going to give you that one. But fine. Desi, if you're going to nitpick, let's cross out... Commit adultery. All right? And if you're going to have to... If you're going to commit adultery, you also have to lie about it, so you can't do false witness either. Um...

False witness, Ronnie. That's just Bible talk for lying to your wife. But the rest of these are rock solid. All right. And that's why he put him on a rock like number five. OK. Honor thy father and mother. You can't get more moral than that. Oh, like like giving parents maternity leave and universal child care. What? No, no, no, no, no, no. Not honoring them like that.

Honoring them, like texting them at 11.55 p.m. on Father's Day. You know what? Let's forget it. There's too much confusion. Let's just cross off number five. All right? And while we're at it, I don't even know what graven image means, so that one's gone. Don't say the Lord's name in vain. I mean, that's just cancel culture, right? So just...

Oh, here we go. Here we go. Look, remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy. We should all take Sundays off. Here we go. Order some Grubhub. Watch the NFL. Yeah, but delivery drivers can't work on Sundays either, right? Yeah, and I guess no football because you can't play games on Sunday. All right, look, let's just cut all the chaff out of here, okay? All right?

None of this needs... Okay? There we go. There it is. Boom. Perfect. Uh, yeah, but all you have left is the thou. Yeah, exactly. This was a nation founded on individual determination. Putting thou self first is the American way. Yep.

Do kids even know what thou means? Well, we're going to teach them. And if there's one thing Republicans support, it's teaching kids new pronouns. Oh, shit. Wait a second. I can't do that. I can't do that. Yeah, yeah. Michael, everybody, they'll figure it out. When we come back, rally show. Donald Trump is fresh off his felony convictions and back on the campaign trail. And that means Jordan Klepper is out there with him, too, in another edition of Jordan Klepper Fingers the Pulse.

Donald Trump has a big month ahead. A debate, an immunity ruling, sentencing, and a convention in the horrible city of Milwaukee. His words, not mine.

So I went to my first rally since he became a convicted felon in the good old battleground state of Wisconsin. And as usual, MAGA was gonna MAGA. Make America great again! I need to make some money! You got a truck you want to show me? Yeah, I do. I wish the world a better place because I was here. Jesus Christ. President Trump. Same font, huh? Yeah. Okay. Chattery, are you at all worried about that whole worshipping false idols thing? Not at all. What do you think about the upcoming debate?

I've heard that, you know, people say Biden won't show up. Do you think Trump is going to show up? Oh, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. He I think he's going to show up. He's not afraid to debate anybody. Oh, no, no, no, no. I mean, except for Nikki Haley. Of course, there's one thing still on everyone's mind. Trump's recent felony conviction in New York for falsifying business records. People are talking about what happened with Donald Trump's conviction recently. F*** that.

Totally. Bullshit. All 34 of them. It's a f***ing mess. Get rid of it.

Why is it a mess? It's a mess because he didn't do anything wrong. Who's he cheating? I mean, other than his wife. I'm not getting into that. It's unjust. It's not fair. Scam. It only takes one crime to send you to jail or prison. Isn't that the truth? Suddenly America's the land where you commit a crime and you go to prison. Are you kidding me? That was a kangaroo trial.

This is absolute Stalinism. So do you have faith in the Department of Justice? No. Now there's the Hunter Biden trial. What did you, Hunter Biden was found guilty. Yes. What do you think of that? Well, there was, the evidence was overwhelming. You take the evidence, you put it through the justice system and he's found guilty. We should accept that. Yes. Wait a minute, hold on. But I thought the justice system was rigged. We shouldn't trust it. It wasn't taking place in a country.

and a community that voted. But the judge was a Trump-appointed judge. Was he? Yeah. What do you think of the whole Hunter Biden situation? Are you relieved? Hunter Biden is found guilty. Yeah, but they're not going to do anything to him. Why not? You can sit around, dump a pistol in the garbage, smoke crack. You get away with all that shit. But it sounds like he was convicted. Yeah. So is that the justice system working?

I don't know. Justice system won't work until I put away. Which are we talking about? Trump. Trump, 100%. When Trump would put away the justice system. No, no, no, come on! Sorry, I'm just trying to keep straight. Jesus Christ, dude. Which part of the justice system do we totally implicitly trust and which one is a total sham? It's hard to keep them straight. But did this conviction dole out justice or just create a martyr? There's a classic cartoon that shows other convicted felons. There's Gandhi.

There's Nelson Mandela, and then there's Trump. You put Trump in line with Gandhi and Nelson Mandela? Yeah. Between Gandhi, Mandela, and Trump, which was the one who had sex with a porn star and then paid to cover that up? None of the above, but one of the above.

And one of them recently made bank off his brush with the law. Spoiler alert: it wasn't Gandhi. So the conviction helped Donald Trump? Well, everyone's pouring in money to support him, so, and I know I've done that a couple times. Trump goes to trial for sexual assault. How much you given?

What is that? Is that a-- - Oh, probably $1,000. - 1,000 bucks for that? Okay, classified docs, how much are you giving? - Another 1,000. - Okay, so 1,000 across the board? - Yes. - Okay, overthrow democracy, that biggie, is that two grand?

That's probably five grand. Wow, okay. Basically, we just need to save our country from the border surge. Right, right, right. We don't need to be shelling out money to give immigrants who don't deserve it. You're sick and tired of your money going to people who committed crimes. That's right. Yeah. Did you donate? Yes. What about for the sexual assault case? Did you give for that? Oh, this is all just so old news, you know? It doesn't affect me. It's old news.

-Sexual assault, sexual assault. Let's move on with the future. -Yeah. -Yeah.

That's a laugh. But what is slightly less hilarious is Trump's second term plan, which sounds a lot like going after everyone who went after him. Based on what they've done, I would have every right to go after them. I am your retribution. Donald Trump is put into office. Should he go after his political opponents? Absolutely.

Rocked our world. him up like he theirs up. Donald Trump, if he gets into office again, should he show any mercy to political opponents? I don't think so. He should go after them. How important is vengeance to you when Trump gets into office? It's probably third on the list. Okay.

Good. So I'm guessing that's between martial law and right before fixing toilet pressure. But there's a simple reason it's so easy for them to give him a pass. But I love Trump, so you know. There you go. It's like if you have a child and they pull some shenanigan. You don't like what they do. You love the person, but you don't necessarily like what they do. The child analogy is kind of perfect, but to be clear, we are talking about the person you want to be president. I want him to be president. Uh-huh. Ha ha ha!

Yes. At least someone is having a good time. Thank you, Jordan. When we come back, Eben Moss-Mackerel will be joining me on the show, so don't go away. Welcome back to The Daily Show. Our guest tonight is an Emmy Award-winning actor you know as Cousin Richie on The Bear. Please welcome Eben Moss-Mackerel. Look it up. They love you. That is very nice. You guys are very, very nice. Wow.

Must be nice. Must be nice to be a... An Emmy winner. All these Emmys on the best show in America. Congratulations.

Congrats on your huge Emmy win. I don't know if you know this. We were sitting down the way from you. Okay. And we looked over and we said to each other, we're like, oh my God, the bear is right there. These are really good seats. Yeah. We were kind of peppered throughout the Top Chef team too. There was a lot of Top Chef folks, I think. Oh yeah. At the Emmys. Yeah. Well, right in my row. I don't remember. All I remember is you ignoring me.

Yeah. Very about this. Yeah, I have no memory of you guys being there. I was like, hey, man. I was like, love you on the bed. Yeah, yeah. Well. Yeah, yeah. Next time. Don't feel bad. Next time. It's the usual reaction that Ronnie gets, so don't. It's okay. No, no, you have like a profoundly forgettable face. Forgettable face. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Totally forgettable. We're such huge fans of the show and huge fans of your character. The clip that we saw was from your episode "Forks" last season, which you-- Cousin Richie goes on this epic journey just in the course of this one episode. You have such a beautiful arc.

Does cousin Richie get to continue down that path of evolution in the next season? What are you allowed to say? Say whatever I want to say. What I feel like saying. Yeah, exactly. You know, I don't know what your personal evolution is like. I mean, I think for Richie, you know, he's...

become aware that there's a path for him to find purpose and sort of live a maybe fuller life, a richer life in a way. But just because he's, like, aware of that path doesn't mean that he's, like, cruising up to the top. You know, I think it's, like, a struggle. Forward, back, you know, uh, well...

When he yelled for 46 years, you know, I think it's hard to maybe put the outdoor voice totally, like, to retire it. Totally, no, I think it's like a... Is that kind of liberating for you, though, to play a character like that? Do you ever just want to mouth off in real life?

Yeah, like I'm, I think of myself as a fairly socialized, polite person. I live in New York, you know, with many millions of other people and you kind of have to, you know, fall in line. And if you sort of say what you feel every second of every day,

- You hear that, Ronnie? That's great advice. - So it is nice. It is nice to walk in the shoes of this man who is fully expressed to a fault most of the time. It's nice. Yeah, I blow off some steam. - Yeah, it's nice. - I'm not just saying this to be nice, but I feel like it is a very beloved show. At the moment, I feel like America can't agree on anything other than the bear is good.

Everyone's always like, oh, the bear? Yeah, everyone knows the bear. Great show. Just as an actor, when the script comes in, like, when you read that script, did it pop on the page, or were you like, I just need some money? Yeah, like a combination. No, it was like one of those rare scripts where I read it, and within a few pages, especially of this character, he just felt...

so vital and alive. Like, a lot of the time, I find myself, like, having to create a character a lot. You know, like, the script is kind of open-ended, and you sort of have to figure things out and build and create a lot. And this one, he just felt really fully formed, and I just had a...

strong connection. I also felt like I knew people like this. I've run into folks like this a lot and spent some time and loved dearly some Richie kind of characters throughout my life. Because the director is also the writer of this. And so how much of that came off on the page when you... Because it's a very distinct visual style, the pacing, a lot of this in the edit. And it's so fast-paced. It's anxiety-driven, honestly, when you watch it. Sometimes it's worse than watching the news. Yeah.

when you're watching, there was one episode, I don't think there was any cuts in it. Or at least there were shots, so there was no cuts. It's trying to mimic a restaurant at its worst, like anxiety-driven energy. So did that come off on the page when you were reading it?

I don't understand your question. Oh, sorry. I don't even know if that was a question. I'm asking when you read words, do you know what the words mean? That's really what I'm asking. We don't have to memorize. We just read whatever they put in the prompter. So it's very...

Yeah, that's true. I thought, you know what? Okay, the level of anxiety, I didn't find that when I read the script. Because I love what I read. I read the first two scripts through the audition process. And I just thought it was really funny and very sort of tender in a way. This story about this kind of found family, a bunch of freaks in a way, or misfits or whatever you, whatever we're...

supposed to say, that like they, that like found this home, you know. And only when I watched like the first episode many months later and it was so like frenetic and crazy and super cutty and choppy, it reminded me a lot of like, like skate videos from the 90s. It was like so kind of wild. And especially in the first episode where they're cutting like video games into it and it was like super loud. I was like, oh wow, that is not,

in any way what I envisioned the thing to be like. And I wasn't sure how I felt about it. I called my wife in and friends. I was like, is this viable? Are we going to go back? Because this was just the pilot. I was like, what do you think? We're going to make that season or what? And they were into it. But it took me a little while to marry the thing I saw with the thing I read. Oh, wow. Interesting. There's such good chemistry between

all of you in the cast. It really, really feels like a tight-knit family. It is, yeah. Now, for Ronnie and I to reach this sort of palpable chemistry, we do trust falls in the back. Is it natural for you all to fall into a rhythm, or did you have to really work and rehearse to get there? We did--

I think we did have like innate chemistry. I think that this is one of like the strengths of the show is that Chris and our other showrunner Joanna and our great casting director Jeannie, they put together a company and I mean, I don't know, everyone weirdly does really love each other and get along and obviously through shared experience and time together, that's how friendship grows. Is that instructive for you guys? There's also something about

like getting to travel and shoot somewhere else where you don't live. You guys shoot in Chicago. Yeah, that's a good point. Woo, one person from Chicago. Two people, two people. We have a very important question for you, and I hate to get political, but deep dish or New York pizza?

Careful now. I don't know. I've met a lot of Chicagoans who would say that deep dish is trash. They think, I don't know, they got a tavern style thing over there, which is thinner, which I like. There's also Detroit style. There's a lot of these Detroit style. There you go.

In Chicago, there's a lot of Detroit. I kind of have-- I like that more. I've had some good deep dish. That's a very politically safe-- Yeah, that was some-- that was nothing. That was some flip flop bullshit. We buy it. Chicago's serious. Chicago's serious. You're about to start a Marvel movie. Mm-hmm. Yep. Fantastic form. The Thing. What kind of training do you get to do?

Yeah, I'm playing Ben Grimm, who becomes the Thing, who's a man encased in rock. So, yeah, I don't know. I've just been looking at rocks, you know? So you like the Stonehenge bit. Yeah, exactly, exactly. And he's scraping them orange. My guy's kind of orange, too.

I should maybe take this trip out there. We knew. Yeah. What am I doing? I don't know. I've been reading a lot of comics. It's kind of nice. Just, you know. They gave me, like, this kind of Marvel Unlimited thing so I can just go on my iPad and go to any comic book that Marvel's ever released. That feels-- That's cool. Sweet. Yeah. Yeah. Well, as someone who was in Shang-Chi for five seconds, I want to welcome you to the Marvel Universe. You'll have a great time.

Thank you. Oh, man. You know, I did-- so I did a Marvel thing for Netflix years ago called The Punisher. I did The Punisher. You were great in it. Thank you. But when I was on a summer trip with my family in Croatia when I got, like, the-- when they asked me to do it. And so I got a call at 2:00 in the morning from this, like, Beverly Hills number. And it was the head of Netflix Marvel. And it was, like, 2:00 in the morning. And my, you know, my wife and my daughters were sleeping in the same room. And he was like, Eben?

I'm going to tell you three words that are going to change your life. Welcome to Marvel. And I was like, oh, thanks so much, man. That's great. And he was so disappointed in me. I was so like. Now you can scream. Now you can scream. Well, congratulations on all of your success. Thanks. Thanks, Liz. You cannot leave. Love everything you do.

So tomorrow, June 21st, we're teaming up with Headcount and Animal Haven to register voters and get dogs adopted. Join us at InDogsVision 2024 Rescuing Democracy from 2 to 6 p.m. at 200 Center Street in New York City. Unlike politics, there will only be good boys and girls there. Now here it is, your moment of zen. What do you say to the parents of students or even teachers who don't share your religious views? Don't look at it.

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