TDS Time Machine | Groundhog Day
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Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. And every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the now. It pays to discover. Learn more at discover.com slash credit card. Based on the February 2024 Nielsen Report. You're listening to Comedy Central. It's Groundhog Day! Yeah! And also, what the hell is Groundhog Day? Yeah!

This is such a strange thing to explain to anyone who doesn't live here. People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather. You know what? This is so unfair. Because if Africans were doing this and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, how would you be judging us? I mean, you realize there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin.

And if I tried to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd probably be like, "But why not use satellite data, huh? Why not?" - And now for our continuing coverage of Groundhog Day '99. Yee-haw. The rodent less taken. Today was Groundhog Day and weathermen across the country took a break from using state-of-the-art Doppler radar to get their forecasts wrong and instead turned to a rabid marmot that eats its own stool.

In Pennsylvania, thousands of spectators waited all night in the rain to see the world's most famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil. Phil did not see his shadow this year, but as usual, did set eyes on a whole bunch of people dumb enough to stand in the rain all night to watch a soggy rodent get pulled out of the dirt.

In Nebraska, Unadillo the groundhog did see his shadow this morning, forecasting six more weeks of brutal winter weather, which is bad news for Midwesterners who look forward to an early spring so they can get a jump on the hot, muggy summers that bring tornadoes and flooding. And because... Not yet. And because they can't go a single day without making children cry, PETA spokesman Dan Matthews objected to the treatment of the groundhogs, saying, quote...

Matthews reportedly then added, Matthews went on to say, True.

But Dan was unable to then explain how an animal who genuinely wanted to would go about volunteering for a yearly experiment to predict the weather. And that was our continuing coverage of Groundhog Day 99. Tomorrow is Groundhog Day, which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day? Have you looked into this? People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather, which is so unfair because if Africans were doing this shit...

and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground. Think about what you say about it. There are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin, and if I tried to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, but why not use satellite data, huh? February 2nd, 2011. On Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. ♪

As you know, today is Groundhog's Day, which means we get to find out how much longer this brutal winter will last. We're gonna quickly take a look at the photo of Puxatawney Phil to see if he saw his shadow and-- oh, that's not good. I guess that means six more years of winter, and we're gonna need to do Groundhog. Saturday was Groundhog Day, which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day?

This is insane. People pull a rodent out of the ground and then they ask the animal to predict the weather. This is so unfair because if Africans were doing shit like this and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, like there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin and if I try to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, ah, but why not use the satellite data? Ah, what's going on in America? - February 3rd, 2015.

From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. It's another kind of cold and I'm going to say day here in the Northeast. That kind of a lot of them. How much longer are we going to have to put up with this? The rough winter weather is not over. That prediction not from the National Weather Service, but from a rodent in Pennsylvania. Let me tell you something about Shepard Smith. The guy knows how to deliver a line.

I forgot we're actually still using groundhog based technology to predict our weather and obviously Groundhog Zero is Puxatawney, Pennsylvania where the Doppler 3000 of rodents was greeted by cheering throngs and gobbler knobs best Zac Brown cover band. You know, I kind of feel like that guy in the audience. Hey, I'm freezing my balls off. Just get to the f***ing groundhog. When Phil finally looked down... Yes!

A shadow I see. Oh, did the groundhog see his shadow? Could mean there's going to be six more weeks of winter. Or that you'll pretty much always see your shadow when you have the place lit up like the set of Transformers. Those are Klieg lights. Anybody would see their shadow in Klieg lights. You know what, that's fine. It's a cherished tradition. There's more winter. The groundhog saw his shadow. What are you going to do? Yet several others reportedly saw no shadow. Oh.

Well, I guess we'll have to teach the controversy. Or some groundhogs are lying. Why would groundhogs lie? What do they have against us? Staten Island Zoo's new resident groundhog never left his enclosure during his Groundhog Day debut. Mayor de Blasio dropped the groundhog last year. Which may or may not have contributed to its death a week later. Did you hear that?

They said him dropping the groundhog may or may not have contributed to the groundhog's death a week later. May or may have not. He dropped a groundhog off Mount de Blasio. It's right there on the video. Can we get a grand jury? Staten Island. God! The point is, after years...

After years of this treatment, some sort of uprising is just a matter of when. Well, a groundhog delivered more than just a prediction at an event in Wisconsin. He suggest... Uh, he says, uh, that, uh, that he, uh... When asked if it saw its shadow, Jimmy the Groundhog chomped down on the mayor's ear. You know, that-that's what you get for keeping grub worms in your ear. Yesterday was Groundhog Day, which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day?

People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather? I'm sorry, this is so unfair because if Africans were doing shit like this and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, like there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin and if I tried to explain to them that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, "Ah, but why not use the satellite data, huh?"

For more on this story, we go to our own senior meteorologist, Jordan Klepper. He's been monitoring the forecast with Westchester Wally. Jordan, thanks for joining us. Thanks, John. Thank you. God, it has been a whale day here. And I'm happy to report that Westchester Wally did not see his shadow, so Sprig is on the way. Are you okay? It looks like... Was Wally mad at being dragged out of his hole this morning because you look... A little scrappy. It was a little...

Well, that ends well. Glad to hear it, Jordan. Maybe next year he won't give you as much trouble. Oh, he won't. I've made sure of that. You'll see your shadow in hell, Wally. You're in a lot of trouble, Jordan. We'll be right back. Today is Groundhog Day. Which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day?

People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather? Really? This is so unfair. Because if Africans were doing shit like this, and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground... Like, there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin, and if I try to explain to them that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, "But why not use satellite data?"

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This is Shirley Strawberry from the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Toyota has been building a legacy of excellence for years, from developing hybrid technology to upping the standards of safety and efficiency. Toyota is always innovating, always making progress. And with a superior lineup of in-stock SUVs, including the adventure-ready RAV4 and capable, affordable Corolla Cross, you can experience the legacy of Toyota for yourself. Visit

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