"Parker Posey"
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Hey guys, I got some wonderful news to share with you. Oh, congrats. Who's the dad? Nobody's the dad or the mom. We're giving birth to a new episode today. What? Yeah. Oh my God. I didn't even know we were pregnant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my God. Cigars for everybody. Boy or girl? We don't know yet. Oh, gender reveal coming. Ew, are you about to explode? Welcome to Smart List. Smart.

Oh, good. He's into the hair.

I'm wearing a hat today. Are you going to get a haircut at any point? Are you going to keep letting it get-- Because I'm going to grow mine out again. I think I'm going to keep going for a little bit for the summer because I'm not really planning on doing too much this summer. You're going to let it be long in the summer. Hang on, Sean. No one's talking to you yet. Do you want it-- Don't you want it short during the summer though, Will? -You mean for heat? -Because it's hot.

Now, it does seem counterintuitive. Sean, can you mute your mic? Sean, he did say that we weren't talking to you yet. No, no, I know, but let me know. Just give me like a hand signal or like touch your nose or something. I think that he's going to get to you and you'll know when he's ready. I mean, I don't want to speak for you, Jason. Okay, so go ahead with the hair. Go ahead with the hair.

Yeah, I think, I don't know. I'm just going to, for the summertime, I'm going to, sorry, thank you, Jason. Sean, even the, yes, don't agree. Even the chuckles. Sorry, sorry, God. God bless.

Wait, but Will, what would it look like if you cut your hair? It would look so different. Would you ever want to just cut the back? I'll cut it for you. No. How about just cut the top and leave the party in the rear? Oh, no, no, no. I was thinking about, or just going, I want to go for like Italian soccer manager, like that guy's Simone Ngozi. Tiny Pony? No, no, just kind of like that sort of Euro kind of long, and then, you know what I mean? No, you look like Javier Bardem in No Country for Old Men. Oh.

Well, that's not a compliment. With the hard ends. No, I know. That's not a compliment. No, if you comb it forward, that's what you would look like. And you'd shoot people with the cow thing, whatever he did with that thing. What was that thing? Sean, has your hair ever been crazy? Has it always been what you got? My hair has been, what, really long? Yeah. You know, when I grow it really long, Scotty says every single morning if it's long, he goes, hey, Mav.

which is Tom Cruise Maverick and Top Gun. Well, that's a good thing, isn't it? No, I know, but he's like... Does he chase you around the house, is he saying? What do you say when you go to Skevo? When you go to Skevo, what do you say? Give me the accountant? Is that what you say? Wait, did I ever tell you? Give me the CPA?

I think I told you this. When I went on tour with Kenny Rogers and he called me. I love these stories. He's a country western star. He would call people up during the 12 days of Christmas from the audience or whatever. And this one woman walked up there and she had like big, almost like Princess Leia like things on the side of her head. And backstage. Cinnabon. Yes.

Yeah, Cinnabons. And I was so stoned during that whole tour. Why wouldn't you be? And...

It's true. Why would not? By the way, what was he charging per ticket for the Kenny Rogers 12 Days of Christmas? That's a great question. I don't remember. It was probably pretty steep. It was. What was the stadiums? It was like huge. But anyway, I go, I said, I was backstage acting like I was in the barber and I commented on the woman. I go, and I looked in the mirror and I go, just planet of the apes today, if you can.

Remember the Planet of the Apes? Women had that bit here on the side. Yeah, we got it. That's why we laughed. Thank you. The laugh was the indicator that we got it. You don't need to explain. Don't sell past the sale. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Yesterday, Will, I had lunch with our friend. This is from the prepared section of Sean's notes. No, well, it's what really happened yesterday.

And I got my tarot cards read for the first time ever. - What? - Have you ever had that? Yeah, have you ever? I've never done it. But anyway, so our friend does this for a living, this person that Will and I know. And I got my tarot cards read, but that's the whole story. I never had it done before. I don't really remember, but I had a world card, a judgment card, and a guy that was hanged. - Did you go all in when you saw your hand? - No, yeah, exactly. - Have you ever had it done? - Have you ever been hypnotized?

No. With a stopwatch? I wonder if they still do that. No, I've never been hypnotized. No. I have. Have you really? Yeah. Why? Yeah. I forget what it was. Is it ongoing? What?

I snapped out of it a couple hours ago. But this was like, I don't know, 15 years ago. I was into some heavy therapy at the time. I was trying to fill some holes and mend some breaks in my brain. And it worked. It worked pretty good. I was surprised because I was pretty skeptical as one would be going into therapy.

Hypnotherapy, I think they called it. What was, and can I just, just to get to the nuts and bolts of it, what was your involvement? Just showing up. Amanda did everything else. Found the person, made the appointment, drove you there. Without a doubt. Yeah. Yeah. She did everything except just lay me back easy on the sofa. No, and then she was hypnotized. She did everything. Oh, it was her. It was her. Oh, yeah.

But it was, I was very curious of like, what would that be? Do you just kind of zonk out? And it was, it basically took me to the place right before you fall asleep.

And so I'm in that space and a bunch of memories easily came back. Oh, wow. It was like right there at my fingertips. And I was able to talk freely about all of these things that I guess are under a layer. Yeah, I would just go straight to sleep. I wouldn't be able to speak. I know, but that's the hypnotherapist talent. They can kind of keep you just like floating right there on the edge, I guess. Wow.

And you remembered all of it as if it, yeah? I guess, yeah. I mean, I did retain some gain from it, I suppose. So, yeah, I guess it's a valid form of therapy for sure. Never. Much better than getting dealt a hand of cards. I mean, what's going on, Sean? That was kind of interesting, but I don't really remember any of it. No, the tarot cards, that is also super valid. Wow.

Who am I to say what's valid and what's not? Don't walk it back. What are you doing? Who are you walking it back for? These people. Do you owe somebody money or something? What's going on? But guys, speaking of hypnotic. Wow. Let's get to it. Sean, world class, Sean. Yes, thank you. My guest today studied ballet as a kid, has some legit mime skills,

plays the mandolin. - Tom Holland. - No, plays the mandolin. As an actress, she's played a deranged vampire, a real life prosecutor, an actor playing a reporter, a sociopath in outer space, and of course, a dog owner with a lot of feelings.

You might not always see her coming, but once you do, she's the only thing you want to watch. Indie queen, forever party girl. It's a totally original and someone I love very much. Double P? Parker Posey? Double P.

Was that torture? I was hypnotized by that. I'm just happy to be awake now. Hi, fellas. Hi. This is kind of overdue, right? Love your podcast. How have you not been on the show already? Are you sure this isn't your second appearance? I don't live in Hollywood. She doesn't live in Hollywood. Well, you don't have to live in Hollywood to be on the show. I know, but someone didn't ask me. I don't live in Hollywood either. Just in

- You're gonna fight me! - I just did! - I'm in upstate New York, but I'll come over. - Yeah, it looks like you live in a very handsome apartment there in the West Village, I wanna say. - Are you in the West Village? - It's called the Chateau Marmont, and it's on Sunset. - Oh, you are in LA. - Yeah, I'm in LA. - Actually, out of all of us, you're the only one who's actually in Hollywood right now, as it turns out, just by your statement. - Oh, really? Where are you guys? - We're elsewhere.

Will's in Simi Valley. Sean is in Chatsworth. Yeah. And I'm in Brea. Sean's in... What is going... What? We get a bang for our buck better than...

Parker, you look gorge. I like the color of your hair. I dyed the hair for a movie I did with Sam Rockwell and John Malkovich, a Martin McDonough film. Jesus Christ. I'm so jealous of that film. I know. I mean. Steve Buscemi. But you had to go to South Africa for it, right? Exactly.

Easter Island. Easter Island. Where is that? They don't know where that is. It's called Wild Horse 9, right? Wild Horse 9. Easter Island is the furthest place you can go in the world being furthest away from anywhere else.

It's a 17-mile island with the heads, with the moai. The cult of the birdman. It's off the coast of South America. So it's not South Africa. It's South America. Yeah. It would be like if you flew from Lima, Peru, and you wanted to go to Sydney, Australia, you'd fly right over it. Okay, guy. Cool it. Everybody's got property in Portugal and familiar with the southern hemisphere. It's smart. I wasn't.

I wasn't. My parents would play a game with me in the car, and they'd be like, what's the capital of Denver? And I'd say Colorado. And they would just think that was hilarious how stupid I was at geography and knowing where things were. And I would do this thing, and my grandmother, Nani, she'd have this world, this globe, you know those globes that you would love to spin it. I'm going to go here. And I would just play that for hours. I love that. And I'd say, you know what?

I'll know where I am when I get there. And if I'm lost and I don't know where I am, I'm going to ask somebody. And they're going to tell me. They're going to give me directions. And before the phones, I knew where to go and I'd ask people, like, directions and I was done.

Did you come straight from Southeast Asia home, repack your bags, and then go to Easter Island? Or was there a job in between? I'm speaking of the White Lotus show. Oh, my God. That's a good question. Because there's been so much traveling that I wake up in bed and I don't know where I am. It takes me... You need a nice sitcom over at Universal Studios. Thank you. Just relax. Do you know what... You know...

I'm really loving Matlock. I'm loving Kathy Bates in Matlock. You are? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Have you watched it? I bet you could do a nice arc on there. Yeah. Just let them know. Oh, I just like that cozy formula. She's just fantastic, and I'm into that. I'm also, I watched 1923 with Helen Mirren. Oh, yeah. I haven't seen that yet. How was that? I was here a few weeks ago.

It's great, you know? I love the costumes and the learning about history and geography. It sounds like you're good about watching stuff. Do you gobble up everything? See, I'm doing all this. This is the awards push of Emmys and, you know, for White Lotus. I've never been a part of the machine that has, you know, had that happen. So you're taking a look at the competition? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. How do you think your chances are holding up? Do you think Kathy Bates is the horse to beat? I do. I do. She's the one horse to beat. She's nominated.

know if there's a horse named after her you know there's a horse named after me is it really like a posy parker and yeah I lived with a woman named Marsha Brill in the West Village she was an 86 year old born and bred New Yorker Jewish lady yeah bad on the horses and she'd go go ahead make my day go

Get him! Make my day! And she would smoke, and she was 4'11". I love it. And friends would come by, and they'd be like, she's fabulous. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, she is, like, having a stiff drink at 5'.

And was an editor. You'd go to the OTB with her or she'd just watch it on the TV? This was on TV on like a little perfect, you know, black and white little box TV from the 80s downstairs around the kitchen. Amazing. But those times are no longer. But yeah, I'm open to L.A. I'm using this podcast for you guys to tell everyone that I'm moving to Hollywood.

No, you're not, are you? But you guys aren't here. You're not in Hollywood. Well, we're in Hollywood. We're not in Hollywood. I'm in the process of moving back to New York, so, you know, I'm going the other way. Is everyone just not? I'm going back.

You are, okay. I don't really know where to be. And I think that's from being in so many stories. And I should figure it out and stop this like... Wait, but Parker, you've been going back and forth for years and years and years. If you wanted to move out to L.A., you would have. But you kind of, you're in both all the time and all over the world. I'm in a farmhouse. I'm a lady. I'm a steward of the land, right?

on this farm in upstate New York. So I couldn't carry both the city and the country. And so now I'm like this, you know, putting bird seed in the feeders. Yeah. Really? It was too much. Oh, I didn't know that. That's a big switch. So,

So, yeah, it's a big switch, but... Like Hudson Valley type deal? Yeah, the Hudson Valley type deal. Oh, wow. Fucking great. Walter Goggins is close by. I just saw him last night. I ran into him. He has completed 18 months of nonstop travel and work. Oh, my goodness. He did Fallout. He did...

Righteous Gemstones, he did White Lotus. And I saw him driving up in the parking lot and I was meeting some friends at, well, friends were picking me up at 535. It was 530. Walton drives up and, Walton! And I see him in the car and I swear he like started crying. He was like, I'm done, I'm done. I just finished all of this, you know, mountain of work. He gets to relax. He's got a beautiful house. We've seen it in magazines. Yeah.

Yeah, my house isn't like that. My house is really crunchy granola sweet. I like it. But you love it. The renovations, I'm trying to renovate and get a new kitchen because there's the insulation, you know, the pipes freeze and all that. And I love a project. But so my house has been this thing that I've...

This being, you know, I don't look at my house like mine. Like I just want to give to it because it's an old farmhouse. So I guess what I'm saying, Will, is like, and you guys, I'm trying to figure out just where to land in a community. Let's shoot it. Let's shoot it. Let's cover it. Let's shoot the reno of the kitchen. Yeah, you can write it off. We're going to get together with the gang over at Discovery.

And they're going to pay for it. Well, the twins. Well, I'm already, that's a great idea because, and that's what I tell the contractors when they come over. I'm like, I want to, can you, are you open to me filming you with my phone? I would love to do like a home improvement show. I love that. Would you wear this? World. Put this on. Yeah. Yeah.

Dress like you're from 1920. Turn around, do the hokey pokey. Dress like you're from 1923. Could you do that? Let's do a period reno. Yes! And get me a hamburger sandwich. And then what about... And wait. Joe Parker...

You also- So I'm pitching all that stuff to like dead eyes. You told me that, I mean, I read that you like Duval kitchens because speaking of renovating your place, what's a Duval kitchen? I had to Google it. Duval is loved spelled backwards.

You stupid. Sean, stop it. You're so stupid. Just throw away my notes. Why don't you just look at the word and you say, well, it would be backwards. I didn't know it was that. It's not a real thing? Is it a real thing? Spell out loved and put it, go to the mirror. I just did it. Just look at stuff backwards. You did it.

Yeah. Wait, it's a real thing? DeVoe? Yeah, what the... They had this show on HBO Max called For the Love of Kitchens. And there were these groovy English people in their 50s, our age. Yeah. And he was making furniture in the 90s and shopping around antique stores and refurbishing this and building that and meeting all these cool guys and...

you know, making a living and being kind of a vagabond artist and making cool stuff. Yeah. And, you know, that started way back then, right? Right. Like, in the 70s, people were making their own furniture and the nomadic lifestyle and all that. Then it goes out of style and then it came back. That's right. But now I think there's a resurgence. People are like, let me see things get fixed and built. Right. And give me the reveal. Let me see how it's made. I love a reveal. And so...

So, yeah, she didn't become a creative director on the show, Duvall, until she was in her 40s and her kids were grown. Oh, so it's a real person. And so there's this partnership, these two people that are so lovely and have this really beautiful show. Oh, okay, got it. And, yeah, it's called For the Love of Kitchens. Got it, got it. So Duvall is their thing. But, see, I don't know if I would...

I said bye to the renovation because it's so expensive. I should just, like, sell it and move somewhere else. No, just keep working. Just keep working. Just keep making money. And then the price won't matter, right? You just keep pumping. It's different for women. Women don't get paid with the guys. I don't know if you've heard about that. What? Make a statement. There's a big discrepancy. There's a big discrepancy.

It just is. In these little indie movies, you don't make money. But you know what? You should be applauded. But you do an endorsement. You should be applauded. I guarantee you, you've been tempted or offered or presented with some very ugly, low-hanging fruit that you have avoided, right? Some big like, hey, Parker, be the star of this big shitty studio movie. And you're like, yeah, I'm good. I like working with cool people and cool things. Is that true? Is it true? It's got to be true.

You know, it wouldn't be true now, I'll be honest. It was true when you were younger, it was true. It was true when I was younger. But no, it still is true. You know, I had to turn something down that would have paid me a lot of money after White Lotus, and I could barely put a sentence together. I was so wiped out.

from almost seven months of work in Thailand and what that heavy lift was and what that long distance run was that it's like, you know, after you go through something, there's like a reverb that I need like,

three months three or four months to to settle down and get back to myself and then they're dangling this big paycheck and and still you and I said I can't I can't feel we'll be right back

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And now back to the show.

You know, it's amazing, Parker. I remember you. We don't know each other, but I lived in New York in the whole 90s when you were doing all the greatest films. And you're one of those people who's doing the kind of stuff that I wanted to do. Like, I just, like, admired you so much and do continue to. And we're about the same age. Maybe I'm 55, but we're like... You guys both play really young, though. I would see you around and stuff, and I wasn't working, and I was desperately, but I'd see you dance.

in the city and then doing stuff. And we had a lot of mutual... And I'd be like...

I just, I want to do what she's doing. Yeah. I want to do work. You're working with great directors. You're working with great performers. You're working with great writers all the time. Like consistently year after year, all the films, Kicking and Screaming, Party Girl, whatever, all these great movies that you did. All the Chris Guest stuff. Yeah. And then you had the Chris Guest stuff. I mean, you got to be really proud. You have an incredible body of work. I just like, but it's,

But it's, yes, I am, you know, I can't say that I'm proud. That doesn't really, I feel so blessed. I feel so lucky. I mean, this is like... Not lucky, fortunate. It's not luck. And fortunate. You had good fortune, but it's not luck. I hate to break it to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is there. I see what you mean. But yeah, it is a thing. And I mean, I want to write another book. The last seven or eight years...

have been so, I'm just full of stories, you know? Yeah, I love that. And I know I'm a story maker and I'm here to share what I'm living and what I'm learning. Now, wait a second, listeners. We have a, you know, we hate the term storyteller on this show for the obvious reasons. No, no, but you just said story maker. I think that's a better story maker. Oh, yes. We're going to allow it. That's a great fix.

Thank you, Parker Post. Parker, I'll tell you why. By the way, you could get away with all of it because you have the credibility. There are too many people now in this town, and by this town, I mean L.A. And New York. I can consider who have been... That term storyteller has become this thing, and they refer to themselves as a storyteller. Or like influencers. I'm so...

so, I barely can do Zoom right now. Like, I've listened to a few of your, I am so feeding the bird feed, you know, putting the seed in the bird feeders. Like, I didn't even know the storyteller thing was a thing that people are saying. But think about it. When you hear people say it all the time, you'll go for lunch and people are like, as a storyteller, you're like, you made an

episode of a sitcom. Yeah, yeah. Fuck off. Exactly. Like, what are you talking about? And why are you referring to yourself in the third person as this abstract object that's full of creativity? Like, go fuck yourself. Right, right.

Right. You're sitting in a chair. Yeah. Shut up. But you, you're right. Jason's right. And you say story maker and you are full of stories and you deserve it. Thank you. Absolutely. You have that. You can back it up.

It feels good to be supported by you guys, you know? We got you, girl. When my fame hit in the 90s, it's being famous and having that kind of success that I couldn't really explain, and I still don't really understand it. Look at this. Parker, look at the screen. Look at that. That's Sean P. Hayes. That's me and you in 1998.

And you had no idea who I was. And I was like, I'm obsessed with Parker Posey. And I grabbed you and I took a photo. And of course, I was in a movie called Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss. And I wear the merch like an idiot. Oh, Sean, I didn't know you were in that. Yeah, exactly. I did it. I was Billy in Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss, yeah. That play, you were so incredible in that play. Oh, you're so sweet. That was heaven. Which one? Sex.

Hang on a second. Are we talking about stop, stop? What's the double word one? What's the double word? Promises, promises. That's it. That's it. Promises, promises. Display. But then Parker, you're speaking about being famous. He said it twice.

But so, but being like, I just had that photo at the ready because I wanted to show you because that was you at, you know, just becoming Parker Posey in the 90s and being labeled the indie queen, which I, did you take that as a- The literal it girl. Yeah, the literal it girl. Did you take that compliment well or did you not want that? You know what it is? It's like when people point you out

in a place as cool as New York and New York City, and you're not cool anymore. So you're... I felt like I was called a name in a way, where I was trying to be, or my path was more like...

Oh, Greg Mottola did a reading of his movie that he was trying to get financed. And then I introduced him to Liev Schreiber, who was in Party Girl. And then we do The Day Trippers a year later because he couldn't get the original script that he wanted financed, financed because the budget was too... You know, it was such a community back then. Right, right, right. And I felt like...

When it got exposed, right when I got exposed and the whole indie movement got exposed, it also got co-opted by the studio system. That's right. And then it became this other thing, and all of a sudden, I wasn't viable to get a movie financed, and it was such a head trip because...

And then I would have to audition for Hollywood movies when I'd carried the lead in independent movies that were shot in 23 days. And all of a sudden I'm in a fluorescent lit room, like sweating and feeling like I'm being gaslit. You know? Like I can promise I can do...

memorize these lines and the scripts and I will have a blast. Let's just go. Trust me, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I wasn't, so I had like a good 20 years of that, you know, after, and then working with great auteurs and doing these, you know, not getting paid a lot, but

being able to, you know, work in the world. Yeah, wealthy with respect. Yeah, my creativity. And feeling satisfied, I imagine. Yeah, it's a weird thing. It's like, it's a mystical thing. I think my life and people's lives can have a mystical kind of quality if they're paying attention of like, and I think it's a healing thing. I think I evolve, I grow, I...

I'm kind of a hippie like that. Well, let me ask you this. Are you at a spot in your career? And then we're going to talk about your personal life. That's going to be great. That's going to be a whole lighting change and music change. But professionally, are you at a place right now that you had the balls to even imagine and dream and hope for? Is this the career you thought you were going to have or the career that you hoped that you had?

It's a lot there. Wow, that's a lot, JB. Yeah. What the fuck, man? That's a good question. You know, when you do a lot of traveling and...

You're not home. I haven't been home for more than five days since February. Right. It's so much more interesting than your career or where you thought you would be in as far as like at, you know, the success that something like White Lotus gives you, right? Right. That I feel so blessed. I feel so protected. I feel in my flow. And that is...

I feel like I've learned, I've been through a lot, you know, from 45 to 56 was a lot easier.

Right. Like, what do you mean? What's a lot? Like good or challenging? Like my dad had prostate cancer for 20 years from Agent Orange in Vietnam. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm talking like a prolonged grief, like anticipatory grief. I think I had a lot of grief with my career and going like, I don't quite understand it. As a woman, you get older and then, you know, and the culture changes. So you have that and you...

You have good ideas that you pitch that are educational and kids would love them and they don't get made. You know, there's a lot of disappointment in the culture right now. Now more than ever. Now more as an artist and you're just kind of like, but this is such a powerful medium. I don't understand this.

why more is being on the screen. If the arts are going to be subsidized in New York, is it going to be the apex of creativity? Then what can we make to form something that will be that and will hold that for our playwrights, for our writers who were born to tell, that have that soul. And I've read enough scripts and I've seen enough plays to know that there is that divine spark there.

when you read something that is like our town or something that is so... And, you know, we used to be a culture that aimed toward that. And I hope, you know, I'm an optimist. Like, I will be that, you know, to Moscow, to Moscow, Chekhov character till the day I die. Like, I believe in, you know... Being in Thailand for so long and coming back to America was so inspiring because...

I mean, everyone, I'm like, ugh, you know, I'm like, this country and these people and these trees and this nature, like, do you know how lucky we are? Right. We kind of like shape up in like this way that has been so. What would you do now that you sit here? I love hearing you talk. Is that too much tooting my horn? I love that. Are you kidding? I love that. I love everything you said. If you had 20 more minutes on that. Wait, did you just toot?

If you had 20 more minutes on that, we would be good. Yeah. Having said all that, when you sit, so sitting where you are today with all that information, like having all that stuff and you tooted, would you, what would you, is there anything that you would have done differently? Was there a moment? Was there a thing? Is there something that you look back on and go, she just tooted.

You know what I mean? Stupid. Would you have done anything differently? No, because you're just all learning about, you know, you're changing and you're like, I mean, I think I could have been easier on myself. I think I could have not worked so hard. And I could have deserved more.

Or felt like you were deserving more, you mean. Yes, that's right. But wait, Parker, I want to go through things in your life that kind of I read about that fascinate me. I didn't know you were a mime. You were trained in mime. That was a lie. A mime trainer? That was a total lie. Oh, I didn't know that. God, I was like... I had to put a resume and...

I'm a fan. I saw Marcel Marceau in New York, like on his 80th birthday perform. And I cried my face off. Because you thought it was amazing that he was moving boxes that weren't there. Yes. Yes. I've never, now where, now has my mind changed?

Anything that can reach like a four-year-old and a hundred-year-old, like what that did, like it was just so artful and fantastic. Jason has a question about mime. I'm not making fun of mime. You're not getting me to make fun of mime, but I lied about it on my resume. No, but is it still going? Because I feel like it's so sort of kitsch now that you could actually make a run at it if you had, if anyone out there has some mime skills.

I bet you could really make yourself a nice living nowadays because it's kind of ironic. And you could probably pack some theaters, some large theaters, maybe not arenas. But I think you could do a theater tour. The question is, is it still going? What about mimes? I mean, your overhead's low. You need something black. Something black and tight. No props. You're not allowed props. No props.

No words. No words either. Go get after it. You need a spotlight. Just a stripy T-shirt and a spotlight. And some leggings. Yeah. I'd go see a mime show. Yeah.

Okay, so wait. So, Parker, you were named after the model Susie Parker, correct? Yeah, there are two parts of the story. They did love... My parents, you know, fell madly in love and married young, and my dad was drafted, and the twins were born. Yeah, you have a twin brother, which I didn't know about. I have a twin brother. And my mom had a friend when she was a little girl who...

My mom was 12, like 11 or 12, like still a Girl Scout. And one of her friends had, her sister had a baby and named her Parker. And my mom, whose name is Linda with a Y, she always hated it. Linda with a Y. Why did my mother, Linda with a Y? And she goes, oh, there's a little butterfly outside. No way. Let's stop for a second. Yeah.

And so my mom said, if I ever have a little girl, I'm going to give her a strong name like Parker. Right. But then she met my dad with this name like Posey, and I almost died at birth. My dad was like there in his army. Wait, wait, wait. Let's not gloss over that. Hang on a second. We stop for the butterfly, but you don't stop for the devil. But you plow through the death? Yeah.

Were you almost dropped? Or was it a... What happened? Were you still in the oven? I was still in the oven. I was born premature. And a week before, on Halloween, my mom got the news that...

that she was having twins. And so the story was that I was in her ribs and they didn't even know where I was. - Oh God. - So I was out at three pounds. - Like Eve, speaking of the Bible, right? Like Eve came from Adam's rib, keep going.

There you go. Wow. It's all coming together. And so, yeah, I was like not even three pounds. Wow, that's small. And so the doctor came in saying, your boy is fine, but we don't know about your girl. We need a name. So we're just going to park her right here. And so I'm going to park her right here. And what's the middle name? And my middle name is Christian because they wanted the help of –

of Jesus and God and anyone else who would listen. And so, yeah, my dad would tell this story that he was in the hospital with a six-pack of beer, like kneeling and praying as he's like looking at me in an incubator with these, like, and he's like, please, God, please let my little girl live. And at that moment, I screamed.

No way. Oh, wow. So I was like, okay, now my dad talks to God all the time. So it was like such a crazy story to tell like a little kid. Yeah. You know how you tell. So I got a lot of that mythologizing. Yeah, that's cool though. As a kid, which I... And then he also said... And I looked at that beer can and I said...

My girl is the size of this beer can. She's like a beer can with legs. And that was like, and look at me now. Were you treated like the golden child? Because you kind of like, against all odds, you kind of came to life and all that stuff. No, no, no, no. I think that's often the case, isn't it? Like sometimes people...

I mean, I was definitely daddy's girl. My dad, I describe as a comedian without a venue. Like he was really funny and really a performer, you know? And, um, tell me about that time. Cause it, about your dad calling you, you were in the summer program. I didn't know you were in ballet. I didn't know you took ballet. I was a, I was a ballerina and my dad, um, I auditioned. I, I went away when I was 12 for North Carolina school of the arts to dance. And, um,

I loved ballet, and I auditioned for the dance program, and I didn't get in, and I was devastated. And my dad called the dean of the school, and he said, my daughter's going to be devastated. What do I tell her? And he said, we loved her so much, and she almost got in because she's so much fun. But...

You just tell her she's an actress. And that's how it all started. Oh, for real? No way. Really? Wow. Yeah, and so I went back to NCSA for acting. And it was there I did clowning, and maybe that's why I, you know, I made fun of mime back then. But I, you know, I have respect for mime, and I appreciate mime. Yeah, for sure. And I did movement and dance and all of that. So where did you grow up? Where was your childhood?

Monroe, Louisiana. Oh, really? Born in Baltimore, raised in Louisiana, and then Mississippi. That's right. We moved to Laurel when I was 12. So I was already, like, out the door. What was your first pro gig?

It was a short, I was a junior in college, and it was a short called First Love, Fatal Love for HBO about a woman and a young person in high school who had AIDS. And this was played by a woman named Alex O'Dare, who I love and adore. She's Gabby Hoffman's older sister, and she's

just brilliant and a great person and woman and she wrote a book too and she's just wonderful and steve zahn steve zahn had 10 lines in that i had 10 lines how old are you i was 20 i think wow wow and then what and then you went you did that you graduated from where were you and then what about you i want to hear like little stories like when did that all click for you guys no but when what how did you get to no no you're in the chair yeah you're in the chair so when you moved to new york

So at NCSA, when I was there at 16, because I went for the summer programs and I just loved it, one of the teachers there named Molly, and she had this big cow, she was a modern dance teacher, and she had this big cow patty bun on her head and wore like, you know. Cow patty bun. Leotards and character skirts all day long. She'd been wearing them for like 35 years, right? And I love the modern dance teachers.

She said, you know, you may want to try auditioning for SUNY Purchase for drama. And...

Because these schools accept different types of actors. Yeah. And so I wanted to, so it was the, I auditioned for NCSA, Juilliard, and SUNY Purchase. And Purchase was the school I got into. That's amazing. Wow. And your roommate was Sherry. Yeah, so that's how it started. And I was going to, I was living in New York City the, 1989, 90 of my junior year.

And freelancing with a manager. I know. Gosh, it's wild to think about how long I've been doing this. That was the year I moved to New York, 90. Wow. Same year. Where did you live? Everywhere. We'll be right back. Father's Day gifting is always the same story. Socks, grill tools, repeat. Gift better this year with Quince. They make buying a thoughtful gift easy.

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southern characters that you emulate sometimes and stuff like, what is your favorite things to go to when creating characters that emulate your family? Like a lot of my Midwestern stuff, like I do that too. We call pop instead of soda pop.

You know, there's Portillo's, which is a very popular Midwestern chain. Obviously the pizza. This is insane character work you're doing. Just as a quick aside, how do you keep track of it all? Just as a quick aside.

Where did you drain? Anything above 50 degrees. Are you in character now? Who are we talking to? Who are we talking to right now? I know. I got to chat. I got to go to zero. So soda you call pop? Pop, yes. Can I get a pen?

Cinnamon rolls with chili is very Midwestern. I put ketchup on steak. My mom used to say, like, my mom used to say- What if you were to play somebody from the Northeast? Who, me or Parker? Yeah, what are you putting on your steak then? No, Sean. What would you call soda then? I don't know what they call- Seltzer. Seltzer.

Right? Seltzer. Oh, do they call it seltzer? Now you're in it. Don't they call soda in the South? If you were in the South, you'd call everything a Coke. That's right. Coke. Anyway, I didn't know if there was any. Yeah, the South is a different, you know, I just, yeah. Did you read plays? Did everyone read plays as a young actor? Always, yeah. I didn't. Well, you were already on that TV show, Jason. Dumb, dumb stuff, yes. How cute were you then?

little show. I mean, pretty cute. I was like, he's cute.

He's really cute. He's very cute. He's still very cute. Very cute. Don't kid yourself. Let's go slow through this section. Okay, so listen. Then, Parker, I want to go through your hobbies, if it's okay to call them hobbies. Pottery, sewing, Ashtanga yoga, which I have no idea what that is. Ashtanga. Ayurvedic medicine. I have no idea what that is. Like, what are all those things? That's so stupid. Oh, man.

Yeah.

Oh, my God. What are those things? What's Ayurvedic? Is that it? Ayurvedic? Okay, when I was doing, I did a movie called The Eye with Jessica Alba, and it was based on a Korean film. Yay, Jessica. It was based on a Korean film, a horror film, about a woman who's blind and gets a chance to see. I'll be honest, I never saw it. LAUGHTER

And so she, my sister, Jessica, gets her eyes, you know, gets a surgery where she gets these eyes back. And they're the eyes of a murderer. And it was a great part because, as her sister, because all I had to do is like, what's going on? You seem different, you know. And I was in New Mexico for like three weeks. Yeah.

And I went to the Ayurvedic Institute and I sat in on some classes with an Ayurvedic teacher named Dr. Vasant Ladd, who is like one of these leading Ayurvedic

people in the country and if you know andrew weill i think his name is or with the with the big gray beard yeah that guy and um so what do you know about it yeah no i know and um i sat in on some classes at the institute there and um i met this um i hung out at the anna perna cafe which is like the indian cafe and found the yoga classes but heard from this guy that there was a um

There was an Ayurvedic school and I should go because this Dr. Vasant Ladd is incredible. So I sat in on some classes there. It was really cool. What do they teach? What is Ayurvedic? It's a science. It's a science of the body. And like we're born into these bodies that tell us what our psychology is and how we should eat and everything.

And then there's three different, it's pitta, vata, and kapha. So everyone falls into these different categories of if there's like, if like I burn through energy, you know, like when I'm working, I'm like,

I'm quick to grasp things, but I can easily forget them. And so it's like a way of your body. You're designed in a certain way. We're incarnated into these bodies to have this kind of experience. And with these bodies, they are teaching us how to be centered and aligned and...

open and... And there's certain programs that benefit each type of body. That's right. Yeah. And certain foods. So there were people who had cancer who did the Ayurvedic...

It's called Pachacarma, I think. That's interesting. I'm going to look into that. It's really interesting. And through diet, they've healed themselves. And then they're like, okay, we're opening a restaurant in Hawaii, and I'm going to serve Ayurvedic food because this is healing people more than my chemo did, you know? So when my dad had cancer, I tried to get him to...

you know, be more, um, to be healthier. And I, I saw someone, um, sent me a doc, a doc called, um,

I think, Surviving Cancer, which had an interview of all these people who said, "I'm not doing chemo, I'm just gonna see what happens with my diet when I change it." And anyway, it's kind of... -That is interesting. -I like all that stuff. I've met two people in my life who, in the last 20 years, who had different forms of cancer, who did similar things, who changed not just their diet but their lifestyle, removed stress and did all that stuff and were able to complete

completely eliminate the cancer. This one guy had been a firefighter and he developed lung cancer. True story. And he ended up being, JB, he ended up being one of the coolest guys I've ever met. He quit his life. He moved to Carmel and he became a caddy at Pebble. No way. Yeah, this guy Ryan. And he's one of the coolest people I've ever met. And he's like,

I wake up every morning and I walk, my wife does it, we make all this stuff and I've changed my life and I like being a caddy. I'm out here in the thing, he plays golf as well. - He's like, and I've just-- - Zero stress. This is what I do now. Zero stress, he refused the chemo and he beat it. - Now, again-- - That's amazing. I don't know if it works, but he really did it and he went full bore, he leaned into it and...

In addition to beating the cancer, and I think he was predisposed to be this way, he had an incredible energy about him. He was an incredibly empathetic, kind person. And he had an aura about him. Like really pretty amazing. That's cool. Or you can wake up every morning and eat a Pop-Tart and stress out about your bottom line, right, Sean? And answer emails like a gopher. Like a crazy person.

That's me. Parker, by the way. Before you hit send, you get a reply from Sean. Do you eat Pop-Tarts? I'm angry. Do you eat Pop-Tarts, Sean? I do sometimes. I have a couple boxes in there now. With a glass of milk. With a glass of milk. But I have to cut down on the sugar just because it's not... I don't have to cut it all the way out. I just have to cut it down a little bit. How did it go last night? I didn't have a dessert last night for the first time in like 10 years. And did you wake up feeling a little snappier? No.

I did, actually. I slept a little better, actually. Yeah, that's what happens. Yeah, yeah. Now, Parker, when you were in Thailand, did you see a lot of the Ayurvedic folks and some of your yoga practice? I bet there was a lot of... Oh, my God, I did it all. I was so excited. I bet that was a dream for you. You must have loved it there. It was a dream. I heard about this place called Kamalaya. Mike's lawyer's wife...

I just struck up a conversation. We had all just landed there like a week, you know? And she said, I'm going to this place called Camelia. It's for women of a certain age. And, you know, I'm going to go there for two weeks and get this all sorted out. And then I saw her two weeks later, and she was just like...

Oh, really? What do you mean, just exhausted? No. Transformed. She was like, it changed my life. Yeah, wow. She got grounded. She was centered. She was like, it opened up.

A lot of healing. So this place and these, it's very, you know, there's an Ayurvedic chef there and it's a wellness center and has one of those plaques that Mike visited this place for White Lotus, you know, a digital detox, please no cell phones at the table and all of that. And there was a communal table and...

I mean, I got to stay there for six weeks. Oh, my God. Wow. And I did Reiki. I did sound baths. I went to that liminal space you were talking about earlier in the show. Right, the hypnotic place. Where you're in between consciousness and you're in a theta state, I think it's called, too. And I had waking, like...

moments and dreams and I saw things and it was like, it was founded on a monk's cave like 25 years ago. This couple, John and Karina, met each other and then reconnected and built this beautiful place. So it's, the thing about Thailand that is so special is the people. Yeah. Like,

A rite of passage as a, you know, I don't know how old, as a 13-year-old is, or maybe in high school, is to live in a monastery and live off the kindness of others who are going to drop off food for you to eat. Wow, wow. So they have, it's a lot of reciprocity. Okay, at Kamaliah, there was a doctor named Dr. Cern,

I had this Moo Moo caftan dress on with dogs on it. And so she knew that I loved dogs.

And so she told me about her, she showed me pictures of her dog KK. KK means crooked in Thai. And KK had crooked eyes and his little like, you know, a mix, kind of a corgi mix, but a little stockier. Sure. And the dog, she showed me these pictures of KK with like carrying a dead leaf, like a leaf or a branch in his mouth.

her mouth. Even KK knows to bring offerings when she wants something. So she would make offerings of like a leaf or something. She'd bring it to the door for food at the back doors and at

And then when you got back to the United States, you're like, oh, this is the best country in the world. So listen. Van Nuys. No, wait. They're so kind. Like it's so, they're so present with you. And it's just so...

Well, yeah. Anyway, I can tell you guys kind of spaced out and checked out. No, we were listening. No, I love that. We were listening. We were listening. I love that.

No, Dazed and Confused, Party Girl, you were Queen of the Indies, all the Waiting for Guff and Best in Show, White Lotus, you were killed in that show. You have, remind me the name of the movie that's coming out. It's called Wild Horse Nine. Yes, and really quick, before, do you remember when I came to your apartment in New York when you were practicing mandolin for Mighty Wind? Yes, that's right!

Yes, and I sat there in your apartment with you, and you're like, I want to see what it's like to be in a Christopher Guest movie. And you showed me the outline of Best in Show, or no, of A Mighty Wind. And I was like, oh, really? So you just make all this stuff up? Like, you completely improvise. It's really cool. And then you were showing me the song that you were making up with the mandolin. Right. I just thought that was fascinating to me. Yeah, it's so... And what a fun... I think I...

kind of got what it was to learn an instrument at the end there. Like I could start jamming with songs and then get that kind of space. Yeah, that was so cool. I'm so glad I got to do that. Do you remember our Oscar winning film we did together called The Sweetest Thing?

Yes. I mean, was that not just creatively the most fulfilling? Yeah, I know. We just killed it. Right? We killed it. I love that. I was so excited to be working with you. We all could be. I really enjoyed hanging out with you guys. You know, you do these things.

and then you don't really feel like you're hanging out. Well, we're going to come over to the Chateau right now. We're going to have lunch. We're going to speed over. I have something at 2.30 and that's it. Parker, we love you very much. Love you guys. Thank you for being here. You're welcome.

Such a fan. And I hope you win. I hope you win for White Lotus because you deserve it. Yes, please. Thank you. I just hope I'm nominated. Yes. I'm honored to be nominated and I hope that happens. So thank you for sending out that Hollywood vibe. I love it. You get our votes. Thank you, guys. Bye, honey. Love you. Thank you, Parker. Love you guys. Thank you. Bye, bye, bye. Oh, then she covers up. Look at that. Look at that. She knows what she's doing. I know what I'm doing.

Love her. Wow. Yeah, really. She's so funny. She's an original. Yeah. Oh, it's just consistently exciting to watch. She was on Will & Grace a lot, many episodes of Will & Grace. Oh, really? Why don't we talk about that? Yeah, what happened to that? I didn't know whether to be like, hey, remember when you were on Will & Grace? Yeah, I didn't have any question about it. It didn't stop me. Yeah.

about what did you remember what we did sweetest thing together yeah i know but um yeah i mean she was she's always been so kind like you said so i remember oh really isn't she hilarious yeah she's amazing she's great she's as advertised she delivers yeah and she's um

I don't know, but you guys, I love all that kind of talk about like all that healing stuff and the Ivoristic or whatever it's called. That's what it was, Ivoristic, good for you. Or something, Ayurvedic. Ayurvedic, that's what it is, Ayurvedic. I wanna learn more about that. No, you don't. We want you to learn more about it. I do, actually.

I actually do want to learn more. Why don't you go to Thailand for six weeks and go to that wellness center and get yourself flushed out? Yeah, why don't you go fucking... He won't even go to the 405. What do you think? He's going to fucking Thailand? He's going to scrape some of the impacted bowels you've got right out. Can you imagine if he had to go to a place that didn't have access to Jeopardy every night? He'd be fucking...

Or Wheel of Fortune. Wheel of Fortune. Never fucking happening. No. I'm not going to Thailand. No. I appreciate these almonds, but do you have any hickory almonds? Yeah. Absolutely. How about when she stopped for that butterfly? I love that. And, you know, a butterfly rhymes with... Here they come. Here it comes. Ah.

Butter... Bye? What? No. That's not even a thing, man. I know. It rhymes with butterfly. No. Keep working. You can just make shit up. Will and I will talk for a while and do some Google searching and come up with a bye. Will, what's going on with your mic stand? I don't know, man. Leave it alone. Is there anyone in the office with you, Will? Yeah. There are 300 people here. Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. What are they doing? Counting paperclips? They're working, man.

They're working away. We got Twisted Metal season two coming out this summer on Peacock. -Oh, look at that. -Give it a plug. -Twisted Metal. -Well, you asked. This is a behind-the-scenes tour, hard rock tour. Super Team Canada. We got Super Team Canada coming out. That's already out. That's an animated show. Check it out. It's fantastic. We also have our new doc that just got released.

Sexiest Man in Winnipeg. Listen, we got a lot of things going on, okay? Sure, sure, sure, sure. Yeah. So Sexiest Man in Winnipeg, that's about a doctor? You just got out of prison? Do you want to know? The truth is, it's about a guy who was a sports reporter. Anytime you're ready, Sean. I can't find one. You can't come up with a buy? I had a whole list. Oh, okay.

It's The Sexiest Man in Winnipeg, and it's about a guy who's a sports reporter who started robbing banks. True story. Okay. Well, it sounds like a lot of stories going on. It sounds like you're taking one and another one, and you're coming. Bye. Bye. I'll allow it just to make the pain go away. Smart. Less. Smart. Less.

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