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cover of episode “Saying These 2 Words Can Fix Your Anxiety & Help You Take Control of Your Emotions & Your Life! LET THEM!”

“Saying These 2 Words Can Fix Your Anxiety & Help You Take Control of Your Emotions & Your Life! LET THEM!”

2024/12/17
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The Jamie Kern Lima Show

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Jamie Kern Lima
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Mel Robbins
一位专注于领导力和个人成长的著名_motivational speaker_和播客主持人。
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Jamie Kern Lima: 本期节目讨论了Mel Robbins提出的“Let them”理论,该理论的核心在于减少对无法控制的事物(包括他人和外部环境)的控制欲,从而获得更多自我掌控。Jamie Kern Lima通过自身经历和Mel Robbins的理论,阐述了该理论在应对焦虑、恐惧和控制问题上的实用性。她还强调了自我价值感的重要性,以及在人际关系中承担自身责任的重要性。 Mel Robbins: “Let them”理论的核心在于接受无法控制的事实。试图控制他人和外部环境只会浪费时间和精力,而减少控制欲则能提升自我掌控感。该理论源于作者自身经历,并通过多个生活实例(例如:社交媒体评论、家人聚会、城市建设等)进行说明。Mel Robbins还强调了以下几点:1. 你无法强迫他人做任何他们不想做的事情;2. 你无法改变他人;3. 你无法强迫他人喜欢你或爱你。她认为,人们应该关注自身可以控制的部分,承担自身责任,而不是依赖他人。 Mel Robbins: 在处理不健康的人际关系(例如:虐待关系)时,直接干预并不能解决问题。相反,应该关注自身可以控制的部分,例如:表达自身感受、提供支持和设定边界。同时,需要接受无法改变他人的事实,并关注自身行为对他人造成的影响。Mel Robbins还强调了行为是最好的沟通方式,以及在面对不健康关系时,需要直面自身问题,并做出艰难的决定。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

What is the 'Let Them' theory?

The 'Let Them' theory is a concept developed by Mel Robbins that encourages individuals to stop wasting time and energy trying to control other people or situations they have no control over. By simply saying 'Let Them,' individuals can regain more control over their own lives.

Why does trying to control others reduce your control over your own life?

When you focus on controlling others, you lose sight of who they truly are and become distracted from managing your own life effectively. By letting others be, you regain clarity and control over your own decisions and emotions.

What are some examples of situations where 'Let Them' can be applied?

Examples include friends judging your social media posts, parents not visiting for holidays, neighbors excluding your family, or city construction causing traffic. In each case, letting go of the need to control these situations frees up mental energy.

How did Mel Robbins discover the 'Let Them' theory?

Mel discovered the theory during her son's junior prom when she was trying to control various aspects of the event. Her daughter's simple advice to 'Let Them' helped her realize how much time she was wasting trying to manage things beyond her control.

What are the key rules of the 'Let Them' theory?

Key rules include: adults only do what they feel like doing, you cannot make another adult change, and you cannot make someone like or love you. These rules emphasize the importance of letting others be and focusing on your own responsibilities.

How can the 'Let Them' theory help in relationships?

The theory helps by encouraging individuals to let others live their lives without trying to control them. This approach fosters healthier relationships by allowing people to reveal their true selves, which can lead to more honest and fulfilling connections.

What should you do if a friend is in an unhealthy relationship?

Express your concern by saying, 'I'm worried about you because you don't seem like yourself. How can I support you?' Then, let them make their own decisions. Avoid judging or attacking the relationship, as this can push them further away.

How does the 'Let Them' theory apply to daily household tasks?

In household tasks, like folding laundry or stacking boxes, the theory suggests that you cannot force someone to change their habits. Instead, communicate your feelings and boundaries, then let them decide if and when to change.

What is the significance of behavior in the 'Let Them' theory?

Behavior is the truest form of communication. If someone doesn't act on your requests or needs, it reveals their true feelings or priorities. Accepting this can help you make better decisions about your relationships and responsibilities.

Shownotes Transcript

Full Video Available on YouTube @JamieKernLimaOfficial). Are You Ready to believe in YOU?🙌 jamiekernlima.com) 👈 Sign up for my FREE Inspirational Newsletter here and you’ll ALSO get special prompt questions to help you grow in your self-worth-building that pair with each episode!🩷 

Make sure to click the “Follow” button for the show on your favorite podcast app, so you’ll be the first to get each episode! 


Get ready to take your power back, and gain control over your emotions and your life. Mel Robbins says 2 simple words can help you do that, “Let Them!” 

Mel’s “Let Them” Theory is her POWERFUL tool you can use TODAY to stop losing so much time trying to control others, which then actually gives you so much more control of your own life back! Mel says we have no idea how much time we’re wasting trying to control people, things and situations and that if we simply “let them” it can truly change our lives. I can’t wait to hear your revelations from this episode and what you are able to release in your own life after listening. 

My friend Mel Robbins has one of the most popular podcasts in the world, called the Mel Robbins podcast, she is a New York Times best-selling author, she has seven #1 audiobooks on Audible, billions of views of her videos online, and is one of the most respected experts in the world on mindset, motivation, and behavior change thanks to her science-backed tools and relatable advice that has impacted the lives of the millions of people who follow her across 194 countries! Her brand new book *The Let Them Theory *is available now, make sure to pick up your copy! 

Episode Reflection Questions for YOU: Jamie writes prompt questions each episode to spark revelations in your self-worth journey and help you apply the tools and lessons from each episode into your real life right now. Please make sure you’re signed up for Jamie’s free inspirational newsletter  jamiekernlima.com) 👈

Get my new book WORTHY plus FREE Bonus gifts including a 95+ page Worthy Workbook and more at WorthyBook.com

For more resources related to today’s episode, click here https://jamiekernlima.com/show/) for the podcast episode page.

Chapters:

0:00 Welcome to The Jamie Kern Lima Show

8:30 - The “Let Them” Theory

17:31 - What Happens When You “Let Them”

19:45 - You Can’t Make People Like You

25:03 - You Can't Heal Another Person

27:34 - Supporting Someone In A Toxic Relationship

34:02 - Take Responsibility For Yourself

37:41 - Our Behavior Is The Truth Of Who We Are

It’s such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note: I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.

This episode of The Jamie Kern Lima Show was filmed & produced by Impact Theory Studios: https://impacttheory.com/)

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