Chris Long Talking Divisional Round, Adam Schefter On Coaching Carousel, Picks And Preview + Fyre Fest
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Live of the year three times. I think first two years you might have had it. Yeah. But right now, Jerry looks to be at the start of a dinosaur. Yeah, he's on fire. We have Chris Long. Then we have our good friend Adam Schefter. We're going to break down some of this coaching stuff. Is Dion going to go to Dallas? It seems like that's a possibility now. God, I hope so. It would be incredible. We're going to break down every game for Saturday and Sunday. We're going to give you our picks. We're going to give you our picks.

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Welcome to Part of My Take, presented by DraftKings Sportsbook. Score big during the NFL playoffs with DraftKings Sportsbook. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers. Get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you bet just $5 only on DraftKings Sportsbook. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, January 17th. And Hank, you know what I'm about to say.

One of my favorite weekends of the year. Yep. Divisional round. And my sister's birthday. Oh, no, I was not going to say that. Happy birthday to Hank's sister. Happy birthday. What's up? Happy birthday. I was thinking about it. I might wild card weekend is great because it's six games, more football, more better, but divisional round.

This is it. This is the final eight teams. These teams all have won a playoff game or had a bye. This is the cream of the crop. This is my favorite. I've been pretty consistent about this one. This is my favorite sports weekend of the year. Yeah. Because in wildcard weekend, sometimes you have, you get some lopsided matchups, which we saw last week. Divisional round, you get the prestigious teams. You get the elite team. Correct. Playing against teams where,

they win their wildcard matchup and even if they weren't favored to go far on the playoffs you're like well maybe the texans can do some damage this year that type of thing so this this is my favorite sports weekend of the year and also next weekend one of my favorite sports weekends here oh the championship yeah yeah because you get to ticket i mean that like the championship round is always you remember who played in championship games you don't always remember who played in divisional rounds next week is my favorite sunday of the year yeah

This is my favorite sports weekend of the year. But I'm pumped, and I've thought about all four of these games back and forth. Some people were angry at me because I was like, the Commanders are Final Four this weekend. This is the Final Four. And they're like, there's not four teams left. I was like, there's four games. Yeah, there's four games. And you're also in the Final Four of the NFC.

Final four. Yeah, have some conference pride, people. Yeah, come on. Get with the program. All right, we're going to do our picks and preview. Do we have anything else going on? I know we're going to talk to Schefter about coaching. It does... I did see Edwarder's report that...

Essentially said Deion Sanders, if he gets offered the Cowboys job, will take it. Now Jerry Jones, will he offer him the Cowboys job? I want it just because it'd be fun. I think it'd be great. And I'm not even factoring in like, yes, I have an anti-Dallas bias. We've demonstrated that pretty clearly on the show that it's been fun to see Dallas at times lose, especially when Hank's rooting for him.

I want it because it would be just an incredible story for the NFL. Like, having Deion in the NFL, especially for the Dallas Cowboys, would be awesome. Like, I want to see Deion interacting with Jerry Jones, how he handles that relationship where Jerry, you know, he likes to have a guy that he can push around sometimes. Deion will not be pushed around by Jerry Jones. Yep. It would just be awesome. It would be good for sports. Yeah, it would. It would be good for sports, so...

We'll see what happens there. Mike McCarthy did interview with the Bears. He did it in person because he wanted the free dinner, I assume. Yeah. Not a fat joke. One possibility. Yeah. Also, maybe just a possibility that Mike McCarthy, he knows that face-to-face is way better than Zoom. That's true. Maybe not with his face. Right. Or also... Wait.

Maybe he just knew that if he showed his face on Zoom, it would look too much like him looking at the scoreboard with his fat, confused face. It would take the whole Zoom up. Yeah, it's like the camera adds 40 pounds, right? So maybe him being in person was just a slimming move. That might be true. And I don't even know what the Jets are going to do. I feel like the Jets have been... What's going on, Memes? And Schefter will tell us, but what is going on? There was a report that Aaron Glenn is... He wants the Jets...

Jets fans want Aaron Glenn, which means we're going to make the wrong choice. Oh, okay. So it's as straightforward as possible that one side wants him, the other side wants, like, this is a perfect marriage and they will fuck it up. So the Jets, they seem to be enjoying single life right now. They're doing a lot of dating. They're figuring out what their type is because they're meeting with everyone. Wait, how many did you do? Did you beat the Bears? The Bears did 20.

I don't even know how you could come up with 20 names. I think, well, with the Jets, it's like they're doing GMs as well. It's like you're doing your own version of that OnlyFans check. Yeah. You're going to, Woody Johnson's going to hold up a sign that says a thousand. A thousand candidates. By the end of this interview series. I think they just also put in a request to interview the DC for the Packers. I don't even know what they're doing at this point.

I think there's just... It's... No, Robert Salah, I think, is a finalist for the Saints. Yeah. And the Cowboys. And the Cowboys. Yeah, I don't really understand the whole process of interviewing, like, 20, 25 guys. Like, I get...

the saying of like no no stone unturned or whatever there's some stones you don't want to look under yeah david shaw you didn't have to look under what that was it just said a punt a bunch of weird bugs and shit yeah it said punt from plus territory i think david shaw is a classy guy yeah he's just a class act so they just wanted some class in that he's a he's a he is also a classic case of mistiming it yes like he was the hot name for a while and then uh it

It kind of faded on him. You got to just strike while the iron's hot. All right, so we'll ask Schefter what's going on with the Jets. Did you see also our good friend Jim Harbaugh gave me and this podcast a shout-out because he's also buying all of Justin Herbert's stock? I saw that. That's insider trading for him, though. Was he asked the question about you, or did he just see the clip? No, he saw the clip. He came in prepared. He...

The question was something like, how did this game go and everything? And then he started answering it. And then he was like, and one last thing, can you play it, Max? And he was like, and one last thing, uh, you know, big cat said this. And I mean, listen, I'm, I'm ready to buy stock. It was kind of outside of the fact that it was, I love that he mentioned me. It's kind of cool how much he has Herbert's back. Yeah. All right. Play it. I agree with big cat, you know, from, uh,

When he said, if you're selling Justin Herbert's stock and he's buying, I'm like,

Completely concur with that statement. So we're going to make billions buying Justin Herbert's stuff. I mean, if you really think that Justin Herbert is a bad quarterback, I question whether or not you watch football. Yeah, agreed. I do. Hank raises his hand. I do, in fact, question if Hank watches football. Yeah, that's true. You're the perfect person to be sitting on that couch being like, 0-2 in the playoffs. Thanks.

Yes. He's not a bad quarterback. No, he's talented. He's a very good quarterback. He's got talent. Yes, he's got talent. He's got talent. Also, Harbaugh. I mean, if Lamar loses this weekend, again, it's kind of this. It won't make him a bad quarterback. Not a bad quarterback. Lamar's obviously really good. But still, if you can't win in the playoffs.

It doesn't matter how good you are. Who cares? Two games is very early to say you can't win in the playoffs. Would you not agree with that? Two bad games. The first game... Yeah, no, it was... They were two bad games. I agree with that. They were two bad games. Because remember, the first game, he didn't throw, like, interceptions, but he... Yeah, he couldn't get first downs. It was one and a half bad games. But he... I still... If next year they go, and they're, like, at a home game, and he completely shits the bed, I will start to possibly...

Like, you know, do some insider trade. You know, Nancy Pelosi unload a little bit of the stock, but maybe not say it. Cannons. I think that what Hank said a second ago is insane. That who cares if you're a good quarterback if you don't win the playoffs? I care. I think it matters. Like, if you're a good quarterback in the regular season, you're still a good quarterback.

Yeah, you do have to elevate your game. You do have to elevate your game. You just have people tacking onto it, but he can't win in the playoffs. Yeah, I just think two games is way too early to say he can never win in the playoffs. If he gets a couple receivers and they get, like I said, a home playoff game and he's terrible, then I'll be like, you know what? Maybe there's something there. But until that happens, I'm buying. I'm buying all the stock.

Did you see also Harbaugh, like a hockey guy, he's getting a heart surgery and a hip, new hip in the offseason. Yeah, he's getting the... Well, it's the heart ablation. So that's...

In a shocking twist of events, I think I accurately diagnosed Harbaugh when he had that moment on the sidelines. I was like, he'll get an ablation. He'll be fine. It's like they're going to shock part of his heart. They're going to put an electrical charge into part of his heart and kill off the bad cells, leaving his heart stronger. It's like the buffalo herd theory. Where the buffaloes get hunted, the weak buffaloes get hunted down by the predators, and then the herd moves faster in the long run. Damn. Yeah. That's a crazy surgery. Yeah. So it's like they're going to, it's outpatient, I think, just basically.

put like electrical charges on his heart and then he's going to walk out of there feeling 100% better. Do you guys ever think about how crazy like surgery is? Yeah. Do you ever, like even, we were talking about the other day, LASIK, like they invented a way to shoot lasers in your eye to make you look, to make you have 20-20 vision for the rest of your life. Yeah, surgery. That's fucking insane. Surgery, to me the crazy part is just anesthesia.

Yeah. They figured out a way where they can kind of kill you for a second. You don't remember anything. You don't feel pain. And then you just come back. And anesthesiologists, I think, make bank. They make bank, yeah. I want to be anesthesiologist after the Super Bowl every year. Yes. Like just put me in a coma until March Madness. Yeah. We've talked about the idea of I really think it would do well like a –

A pod that you could put your body into after a bachelor party for 24 hours. That's like refrigerated. Yeah. You know, when they, when there's a spinal injury and they bring your body temperature down to like 86 to, to stop the swelling, uh,

Imagine if you're like, all right, I just finished a three-day bender. I'm going to go lay in this pod for 24 hours. They're going to knock me out. They're going to cool my body down. And when I wake up, I'll feel great. That's why you got to take the buffer day after the bachelor party. Yes. Take that work day off on Monday. Use that to recover. I had a friend once who did a move that was insane. But looking back at it, it was like, holy shit, he might be a genius. He rented a hotel room in the city we were in and stayed on Sunday night.

Just to sleep. Yeah. And then flew back on Monday. I had some buddies that... You have the extra day. Yeah. That's very smart. Yeah, he's just like, we all were ready to go to the airport. And he's like, all right, I'm going to my hotel. And I'm like, what are you going to do? He's like, I'm going to probably eat dinner by myself, go to sleep at 7 o'clock and sleep. I had some buddies. We did that for a bachelor party in Colorado.

Where on the last day, they just said, okay, we're going to leave. We're going to go up to Denver. When weed had just been legalized there, they're like, we're just going to get really high and sleep all day Sunday and then into Monday morning. Yeah. Ease ourselves back into the real world. Yeah. Shit, even after doing like two nights where you don't sleep that well, it'd be awesome to have that pod go in at like 6 p.m. Right. And then wake up at like 10 a.m. the next day. Someone invent that. Yeah. We have all types of surgeries, Max. Are you thinking about your bachelor party that you got to go on?

Or Bachelorette. Or Bachelorette. Yeah. Yeah, I was going to talk about that. We haven't got a lot of submissions. I mean, the submission we got last night is an all-timer. You want to say it? No. Let's talk about a Fyre Fest. It's a Fyre Fest. It's a Fyre Fest? You have a Fyre Fest this week? No, we can just talk about it then. Okay. Why not just, I mean, we're naturally talking about bachelor parties. That's fine. We'll circle back to the bachelor parties. Yeah, we'll circle back to the bachelor parties. What's the issue?

It was football. It was time to talk about football. Okay. I have one non-football related story that I think it's one of the more fascinating stories of the year. And it's a soccer story coming out of Italy. What is this? So, Hank, just... What a lead in... Yeah. We're talking about other football. So far, I'd say this is the story of the year. Okay. Lazio, the Italian football club. Okay. They're in a bit of hot water right now because they have an official team, Falconer.

The guy that flies the falcon. He does falconry. He does falconry. Yeah, he's a falconer. Falconer. Falconer. He does falconry. Yes. So this guy, he's been with the team for years and years and years. And he manages the falcon, flies around the stadium. They're the falcons? Their mascot is a falcon. Okay. It's part of the pageantry. Dumb question. Just wanted to. The Serie A club, Lazio. Yeah, yeah. This guy just got fired.

He got fired because he had a penile enhancement surgery. Was he fucking the Falcon? No, he was not. Well, we don't know. We don't know. I can't take a story about a guy fucking a Falcon. To my knowledge, he has not fucked a Falcon, but it would not shock me if it went there at some point. It's a crazy story. So this guy got fired because he got a dick implant.

That's not cause for firing, but right after he got the dick implant, he posted a picture of his dick with a dick implant saying what a great surgery he just had and how he needs to ejaculate at least twice a day with as many women as possible. The owner of the club said this... Like in his pants or just straight up posted his dick? Naked? I have not seen the picture. I've read the articles about his dick was out in the picture and he's bragging about his dick implant. So he was fired...

The owner of Lazio was very, very upset with him. This guy apparently lives on the training ground with the Falcon. He lives like in the team facility with the Falcon. He was suspended in 2021 because he was doing a Benito Mussolini salute. And then they brought him back. They said, okay, you've served your time. We're bringing you back. So fascism. Okay. Fascism. Okay. It's not. So he has been fired from the team for posting this picture and

And then he barricaded himself inside the team's facility, demanding that he have his job reinstated. So he's in a hostage situation, potentially with the Falcon, like threatening to kill the Falcon to get his job back. And jerking off because he's got to ejaculate twice a day. He has to ejaculate twice a day. The owner also fired the doctor that did the penile enhancement surgery because apparently that guy's also the team doctor. So the team doctor gave the Falconer a new dick.

This feels very wrong in the fact that, like, it's an Italian league. Yeah. I mean, Italians are horny. They're horny. Why would the owner be against this? This guy... Guy's just trying to get laid and also lay better. This guy... Is the owner... It might be like the owner's not Italian. Oh, and the owner's got a small dick. The owner's definitely got a tiny penis. The owner is 100% Italian. His name is Lombardi.

So Lotito. So Lotito. Claudio Lotito. Claudio Lotito. And then he did come out and officially say that the picture that he posted is worse than the fascist salute. Okay. Yeah. So the story just keeps getting weirder. I don't know what's going to go on with this hostage negotiation. If he kills the Falcon, I'm out on this guy. Right now, I think I'm on his side. Claudio, the streets are saying that you're upset because...

You have a smaller penis than this guy. Yeah. Don't let that become the story. Yeah. Let this guy just keep his job and keep the Falcons safe. Listen, I mean, people get surgery to get themselves better. What's wrong with that? I agree. Like, some people on this podcast have had...

some elective surgeries and there's nothing wrong with that. There's no problem. He had a procedure done. And yeah, I just want to say I stand with the Falconer. As long as he doesn't harm the Falcon. Not the Mussolini stuff. Yep. I disavow that. Yep. But I think let... He's Italian. He's Italian. Let him be a little bit horny. I think it's good for club morale. You don't want to have a Falconer out there with a tiny penis.

No. That's awful. No. So he's trying to better himself. He's probably trying to improve the club's image as well. And if he does harm the Falcon, then I'm out on this guy. But right now, I think he's reacting as you or I would if we were in this situation, which is to grab a bird, take it hostage, and then barricade yourself inside your employer's facility. While you masturbate all day. While you masturbate all the time. I don't see anything wrong with this.

And yeah, we stand with him until he does. Until he hurts the Falcon. Harm the Falcon, at which point we wash our hands. I also like it sounds like and I don't know the picture, but it sounds like he was just kind of putting out like a PSA. Yeah. Like, hey, I got an awesome new dick and it needs to get sucked. So that's what he was. So could anyone anyone who's got a mouth? Let me know. His explanation for it was I was promoting.

self-love i was i was promoting i was shining visibility on a part of lives where people are generally afraid to discuss this they're they're ashamed and they shouldn't be ashamed look i had the surgery it's good for me you can too yeah yeah raising awareness of his bigger penis and just yeah self-betterment should not be frowned upon they gotta get girls that's how you break through the hostage situation yeah send some girls in

Open the doors and then bust in. Yeah. Send some chicks in. All right. So falconry guy.

Keep fighting, but don't fight the Falcon. Oh, also the doctor that was fired by the team claims that he was not fired. Oh. Because he's not under a contract with the team. And also probably because Claudio wants that surgery. Yeah. Is what the streets are saying. Yeah. Again, Claudio, don't make this part of the stories. You're jealous of someone else's penis size. So this guy is the team doctor, but he didn't have a current contract in place. That's just wild to me that the team doctor is putting dicks in.

Yeah. But I guess it makes sense for Italian soccer. Yeah, that's exactly what Italian soccer would be. I bet you that guy that goes out on the field for the Cowboys with the cowboy hat, that doctor, that guy's definitely given Jerry Jones a penile implant. Yes. Oh, yeah. I remember that guy. He's the funniest. Any guy who's wearing a cowboy hat who's a doctor or a lawyer.

It's always funny. Yeah. How is Lazio doing this year? I did not care to look that up. They're fourth. So they're actually good. They're in the... Right now, if they finish where they're at right now, they'd be in the Champions League next year. They're ahead of Juventus. So you're fucking up a good thing here, man. Yeah. I think this is a curse waiting to happen. Waiting to happen. Okay. Should we talk some football? Some American football? Yep. All right. Before we do that...

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Okay, boys, let's do it. Time for the games. And I'm excited about all of these games. Saturday afternoon, we're going to start. Oh, by the way, just a note. So there's two eight-plus-point favorites. And the two... So eight-plus-point favorites...

have not lost outright since the Ravens lost to the Titans. Remember when the Ravens were the one seed in 2019? And then the previous one was the Chiefs and Titans in 2018. So that was before Mahomes. I think that was Alex Smith. Mariota for the Titans, yeah. So it's been a run for eight-plus-point favorites in this round to win outright today.

So that's why I bring that up with the Texans and Chiefs because right now the Chiefs, Texans versus Chiefs on Saturday afternoon, the Texans are 8.5 point dogs. The over-under is 41.5. I am not going to do the thing where I tell myself the Texans just won a playoff game. The Chiefs haven't won any playoff games this year. You've got to take the Texans. Yeah.

Hank is. Hank is 100% going to do that thing. Which, that's good. We need somebody that will do that. I won't be afraid. Yeah, the Chiefs' defense is completely different. Like, their defensive line, Chris Jones against that Texans' offensive line, I think it's going to be an issue.

And the Chiefs are healthy. They're rested. They've got all their guys. We saw them at the end of the season. Don't forget how good the Chiefs are. Stop forgetting how good the Chiefs are. They're awesome. Their offense is humming. Everything looks good for them. Andy Reid off a bye. Don't overthink it. It's also going to be a high of 17, low of 3 in Kansas City on Saturday. So, Hank, did you count on that? No. That the Texas boys going up Tornado Alley to Kansas City –

playing outside at Arrowhead Stadium in the cold, that should factor into it too. Yeah, that's going to be a problem for the Texans. Yeah. Jalen Watson is supposed to be back, which is huge for their defense because if you had to say one weakness is when he got hurt, Chiefs secondary could be vulnerable at times. But I think this game comes more down to the Chiefs looking at their season. They did what they've done the last couple years where –

They won a shitload of games. They looked not great in some of these games, so people threw doubts at them. And now they're coming into the playoffs, and their offense is fully healthy. Pacheco's back. They got Xavier Worthy, DeAndre Hopkins, Juju Smith-Schuster is getting worked in, Hollywood Brown. The last time we saw them, eight guys caught a ball, and Patrick Mahomes had 320 yards and three touchdowns. That was against the Steelers. So...

I think they're just going to flip the switch and this offense is going to look great. And it's playoff Patrick Mahomes. Playoff Patrick Mahomes in the divisional round. You ready for this? He is 6-0. Yep. He has 1,813 total yards, 16 touchdowns, total touchdowns, zero interceptions, 70.4 completion percentage. He plays in this divisional round and he's basically just

I mean, he's undefeated. He's lights out. That's just what happens. It should be 6-0 Asterix because the Browns should have beat him that one year. But not actually. But they didn't actually. Yeah, they didn't actually beat him. The Chiefs ended up winning that game. But yeah, Patrick Mahomes in this round of the playoffs. Lights out. Don't forget that. Stop forgetting about the Chiefs.

This is the rematch of the original Thanks for Coming Out. Yeah. So back in 2019, the Texans were up 24 to nothing against the Chiefs. Yep. With 10 minutes left in the second quarter. Yep. They're up 24 to nothing.

The final score, 51-31, Kansas City. That was crazy. They just poured it on them. They were down 24-0, 10 minutes left in the second quarter. The Chiefs were winning at halftime. It was crazy. And that felt like that was right at the beginning of all of this happening and Patrick Mahomes becoming Patrick Mahomes. He is also... How old is Patrick Mahomes now? Is he, what, like 28 years old, maybe? Find his age. He is... If he wins this game...

He has tied Joe Monta. He's 29 years old. Joe Montana for playoff wins. That's crazy. It's crazy. 16. He's still got a long way to go. Tom Brady has 35, but I was looking at it. I think if he wins this game, he has something like more playoff wins than I think it's like 10 or 11 franchises. Just him personally. Yeah. The graphics are going to be crazy. Yeah. So it's, uh, he's just so goddamn good. You can't forget about Patrick Rose. Now,

Also, he gets the baby bump. Yep. So he welcomed a third child, Golden Ray Mahomes, who all three of their children are bronze, silver, gold. It's kind of crazy that he waited for the third one to be named gold. Yeah. I think bronze is the second one because it's Patrick. The third is his son. So he's technically his nickname is bronze. And then Sterling Sky is silver and then Golden Ray.

Listen, people do whatever they want with their names. I mean, it's, you know, I think the wealthier you get, the crazier you get with your names. Andy Reid calls the sun 3 p.m. 3 p.m. Because Patrick is 2 p.m. And then that's 3 p.m. Yeah, do whatever you want with your names. I always thought that naming your kids various types of cheeses would work out well, too. You got Colby, Jack, Pepper, Monty, Brie. Yep.

Gouda. Gouda. Gouda. Who could forget baby Gouda? Sharp cheddar. Yeah. Yeah. White American. White American. Yeah, white American. White American. This is my son, white American. Yeah.

That actually rocks. White American. Actually, I get to name a litter of puppies for Paws. Oh, nice. Because we won that auction at the Paws Gala. I might just go all cheeses. We should go all cheeses. Various types of cheeses for the dogs. Yeah. Let's at least say something nice about the Texans. I do think their defense is... They won't get rolled over by the Chiefs. Their defense is elite. I'm just nervous about the Texans' offense because...

It hasn't been good this year. And it's, there's a lot of, there's a lot of data behind them just not being very good. And in a game against the Chiefs, you pretty much have to play perfect to

to stay in this game. Now, they did stay in the game when they played, what was it, like four weeks ago? That was the game Tank Dell got hurt. Did they only lose by seven, I want to say? Yeah, it looked close in the first quarter and a half, I want to say. Yeah, so I don't... But the Texans' defense is capable of stepping up their game to a point where they can frustrate really good quarterbacks. Correct. We saw that with the Bills. And the Chiefs' offensive line is not great. That is another area of weakness. So I do think... Bills and the Lions, right?

The Bills, the Lions, the Dolphins, the Chargers, the Texans defense took all those teams and made their offense look significantly worse than it is against everyone else. It's just Patrick Mahomes. That's the thing that I just keep going back to. Yeah, they lost by eight in the meeting they had a month ago. So I'm not saying the Chiefs are going to – it's going to be a cakewalk.

I just keep looking at this eight and a half, and I'm like, it feels like a game the Chiefs are going to be up by seven for the majority of the game. And then at the end, you know, go on one of those patented late second half Chiefs drives,

where they just burn clock, get a bunch of third down conversions, either kick a field goal or score a touchdown to win by 10 or 14. Yeah. Do you think there's any additional pressure on Patrick Mahomes now that his brother's biggest source of income has dried up with the TikTok ban? Like now Patrick Mahomes is the breadwinner in that family. He's feeding it all. Jackson Mahomes was independently wealthy. And now it's like all on his shoulders.

Travis Kelsey, maybe. New Heights is not. I like memes thrown. Did you see memes tweet last night? Just showing some podcast charts. What do you say? Just bragging on our behalf. I like that. We don't really brag about it, but it was nice that memes bragged on our behalf. It just showed the rankings and it was us one and then we had two out of the top three episodes as well. So that's just memes being a good...

soldier for us also all respect to the kelsey guys oh yeah i like both of them a lot like i mean jason kelsey is max's i don't vision board yeah i mean would it be his hall pass maybe i technically i think max goes to sleep every night looking at a picture of jason kelsey like this is this is my goal for tomorrow to do that no i i like both kelsey's and i also think that this is going to be three kelsey's

Oh, yeah. Kylie. Yeah. I do think this is where... And Mama. And Mama Kelsey. No one talks about dad. It's a

It's bullshit. It really is bullshit. I do think this is where Travis Kelsey ramps it up. Like, I like his over yards. I think this is he plays in second gear for the majority of the regular season. And then when you get to these points, the two things that I always look to is Mahomes rushing yards in the playoffs and Travis Kelsey yards. Because that is when they need a big play, it's Travis Kelsey or Mahomes using his feet. And we've seen it time and time again. And I think that's exactly what's going to happen on Saturday.

I like C.J. Stroud rushing yards too. I like the last week that hit and you go back to back when he was in college. Yeah. In that playoff game, everybody's like, oh shit, C.J. can run. Yeah. He can use his feet. I think he'll do it again. That might also just be a product of plays breaking down sometimes around him. And he's not... I think the Chiefs defense is going to do a very, very good job shutting him down. Yeah. But yeah, I like the Chiefs. Now, if the... So I don't want to... Because we've obviously put a lot of love on the Chiefs even though...

I'm sure there'll be some Chiefs fans being like, all you guys do is suck off Josh Allen and, you know, you never mention, and Jared Goff, you never mention Patrick Holmes, who is the best quarterback in the NFL, even though statistically he wasn't this year. You'd still take him 1-1. The Texans. Hank, make us a case. Defense makes a play. Okay. Control the ball on offense. Joe Mixon, two touchdowns, own time of possession. Gotta get lucky.

That's a good game plan. Can we get a keys to the game for Hank? The cold is... I don't like that.

Isn't it weird that I don't... This probably just goes all the way back to candy-ass uniforms, but if you told me it was cold for Miami, I'd be like, they have zero chance. For some reason, I'm like, Texans might still have a little bit of a chance. Yeah, I don't know about that. Houston, dome. Yeah, I know. I'm admitting that it's completely based on the candy-ass uniforms. Not really a dome, though. They open up the roof a lot. At NRG? Yeah. They do? Yeah, from time to time.

If it snows like an inch in Houston, the world shuts down. That's true. That's a fact. They can't handle it. What are you going to say, Max? I feel like D'Amico Ryan feels like a cold weather coach. Yeah, that might be it. It's very opposite Mike McDaniel. It's the bald head, I think. There's something about him that feels like he can coach in the cold. There's a toughness about him. The Texans are also wearing... Joe Mixon's the key to the game. And they'll get lucky.

Well, yeah, that's just a playoff, though. And also keep Patrick Mahomes off the field. Yeah. By Joe Mixon. Those one and three are basically the same thing. Let me give you another key to the game. Somehow hope that Carson Wentz's name starting quarterback. Hank, what would you say? Would you say it's a key to the game for the Texans to get sevens instead of threes? Not necessarily. Oh. Stop giving away all my keys to the game for commanders. Shit. I've been teasing this all week. Fumble. You got to...

You got to have a turnover. That's the luck. Yeah. Yeah. Get lucky. Turnover. Six. Pick six. Kick return. Touchdown. Punt block.

Can we stop? I'm not going to have any more keys left. No, my keys are completely different, but those are valid keys. Those are huge keys. Yeah, but the Texans also wearing all-white uniforms, which led to a lot of infighting amongst the Texans fan base, whether or not they should be excited about this. I found a great interaction underneath the official team tweet about it from Astros Fade. We've never won a playoff game in all-white. What are we doing?

Texas Uniform Tracker replies, to be fair, we've never won any playoff game in white jerseys, regardless of pants. And then Sad Astros posts, to be fair, we've never won any divisional playoff game. And then Astros Fade replies, we've never won a road playoff game in general. So it might not be the white pants. You drill down a little bit and you find out it might not be the white pants. Yeah. If this game was at home, we need the Texans next year to somehow get...

like a two or three seed and wear white pants at home in the divisional round. And then we can kind of, then we can parse it out. Yeah, exactly where we're going wrong with the uniform. Okay. Let's do the next game. Commanders at lions. Lions are nine and a half point favorites over under is 55 and a half PFT. You've been teasing your keys to the game. So I'll let you take it. Okay. My keys to the game. Should I write these down? Yeah. Okay. You should hold on. Hold on.

Number one. By the way, people were asking what I was writing down during our vagina conversation last week on Wednesday. I was drawing a vagina to see if I could get hard just looking at just a vagina. Big Cat does take notes during episodes. Yeah. All right. Here we go. All right. Keys to the game. Number one. Fuck them up. Fuck them up. I love that. We got to beat the fuck out of them. Now, would you...

You can't say four quarters of fuck you football because that's Notre Dame, but would you like them to play four quarters of fuck you football? I'd like to play five quarters of fuck you football. Okay, five quarters. Because you've got to be ready for 110%. Fuck them up. Really, really fuck everybody up. Number two, kill everyone. Kill everyone. Especially on defense. Women and children? Put the women and children to bed. Women and children to bed. That's key 2A. Okay. Number three, Jaden Daniels. Yup.

I think that one, you know what I'm going to do for that one? I'm going to underline it. Okay. Underscore. Yep. And number four, the fourth and final key to the game. I absolutely need an incredible hype video. Yep. And I'm talking, this has to be the best hype video that I've ever seen. Yes. There's a lot of, I might make my own hype video. Yeah. The best one you've ever seen.

but i'm going i'm going to man what a shot i'm going that was so mean i'm going to make the best hype video you've ever seen don't let him talk to that yeah talk to you like oh hank hank's a loser don't let him talk to you like that you're not even in the playoffs you don't know shit about hype videos oh i'm gonna make the best hype that i've already got an idea for it as a matter of fact well if he makes a hype video probably the best hype video he's ever made

Ever made. Ever seen. He's ever made. I'm talking the best hype video of all time. ACDC with like... No. Glitter transitions. No, no, no. Hater. It's going to be... I'll just...

I think it's got to be Fix You by Coldplay. Oh. And I think it's got to start... What? I don't know about that. Oh, yeah. Wait, is this after they lose and you're remembering them? No. No. Fix You starts sad. And then it's like, when you're lost out there... And then you got pictures like Dan Snyder. You got a picture of RG3. Yeah, that's... You got a picture of the stadium raining shit on fans.

Okay, that works. You try your best, but you don't succeed. And then it's a picture like the Sean Taylor statue that's not even a statue. It's all the bad stuff. And then it goes, Ding, lights will go.

As Jaden Daniels is getting drafted. Walking out of the tunnel, yeah. It's him getting drafted at that point. And ignite, I will try to fix you. I'm following. And then Jaden's out there. No, this works. Whipping passes, Gilmerys. Someone make this for PFT. He just gave you the vision. No, I just went back and listened to the song. It's more of a, like, after you win, like...

Like yearbook video. It is. It is a little bit of that. It's a yearbook video. It gets exciting at the end, but that's when you show like the winning the Super Bowl. Let's go win it. But for the hype video needs to be like, that's not a fire me up song. You don't know shit about hype videos. This is my vision. This is not. I might swear up in that corner. Whoa. No, it needs to be like Iron Maiden and shit.

Run for the hills. That was my first job here was making hype videos. Really? What was your best work? I did them for you. Ducks. I knew that. I knew that. I knew that shit. Just let me enjoy my vision. You do your hype videos your way. Were you texting them to me? No, I would text them to Hank and Hank would text them to me. Oh, that's the problem. Hank was taking credit for it. No, I wasn't. Yeah, he was. No, I wasn't. He was taking all the credit. Do we have a hype video guy now at Barstool?

The Quigs. Quigs. Alisak makes some good ones. We don't talk about him anymore. I'll talk to Quigs and we'll work on it. But right now I feel like just let me follow my vision, which is Coldplay. I think people, I think this should be a fan submitted one now because like. Well, you were just taking credit. If you, if Quigs makes it, it might be good.

If Quicks makes it, it will be good. He just keeps taking shots. I'm going to make the greatest. You don't think I can do it? He can direct it. Yeah, direct it by. That's what I was doing with Max. It's going to be a PFT joint. That's also not even true. I think you should have. I'd send you a song and be like, here you go. You would do that like once every six videos that I made.

that was bullshit. And probably whenever he said that, it was because I said it. I was like, I want this song. That's probably true. Yeah. I was playing a lot of call of duty back then. He was just being the middleman. Uh,

You should just do fan submitted because now you'll have like a hundred hype videos and one of them is going to be an absolutely incredible. Like people are going to make this now, whether you ask them to or not. Well, let me do the cold play one. And then, but I am interested in watching all the hype videos. Like that's to me, that is a key for my game is to just, you got to have great hype videos going on this week because it's us against the world, Washington versus everyone. That's what they're saying about this game. I, so my take on this game, and this is a compliment, uh,

I think the Lions are going to fucking kill him, but I can't bet him because of Jaden Daniels. Because I keep thinking in the back of my head, like, but what if Jaden Daniels does something crazy? Like, the Lions are better, and they should... The Commanders play a lot of man coverage. Jared Goff is number one beating man coverage. I think Dave Montgomery is back. So I, like, keep going back. Like, the Lions can name their score, but then I'm like, but Jaden Daniels and, like, everything that happens and the voodoo stuff...

I don't think I can bet the Lions. So that way I can root for the commanders with you. Yeah, a couple weeks ago I said if we do, if we win our first round playoff game, we're going to be very lucky if the Lions don't score 70 points on us. Yeah. Like the Lions have, they've got a great roster. They've got all the weapons.

They've got an incredible offense. I was shocked to learn that the commander's rushing offense is actually better than the Lions' rushing attack. Oh, wow. It doesn't feel like that, though, does it? But I guess you've got to take into account Jaden's legs. Yeah. He's been a big part of that. Montgomery coming back, I'm more afraid of Gibbs. Like, I know that Montgomery's a great running back.

But if you were to say, like, are you more afraid of a healthy dose of Jameer Gibbs or splitting time with him and David Montgomery coming off a PCL, like an injury that people thought was going to be season-ending. Yeah. I'm okay with Montgomery and Gibbs splitting carries. I just think that our pass defense has to step up. Lattimore's healthy, I guess. I don't know. I think there's going to be—

On defense, I think we're going to have a lot of moments where Lions receivers are running completely untouched somewhere down the field. Did you know that our pass defense is third? Is ranked third? That doesn't feel right either, does it? No. The commander's pass defense? I don't know how that works out, but yeah...

I want to believe in the Commanders. If it's a one-score game in the fourth quarter, we win this game, I think. But then you have to wonder what happens in the first three quarters. But, I mean, think about it. The Bears went into Detroit and basically beat the Lions on Thanksgiving. They've had games where they look human. The last month or so, they have not. They've looked incredible. Our offensive line has done a much better job, especially with our center coming back, Piatas.

Sam Cosme is playing really, really well. So I realize I haven't talked about any of those guys. I've just been focusing on Jaden. But we've had our team has stepped up. We play weird games. We will not blow anybody out. We'll be lucky to keep it within a score because Detroit is so, so good. But if we can keep it within a score, Jaden Daniels can go out there and win the game. And the Lions buttholes might get tight.

Lions buttholes might get tight. The other thing I would say is Aaron Glenn, his defenses usually struggle with mobile quarterbacks. Like Justin Fields used to give them fits, and he's had that happen multiple times, not just once. So Jaden Daniels might be able to use his legs significantly on Saturday. What are you looking up, Max? This pass defense thing?

For some reason, I've clicked on four different things and said four different websites said four different things. Well, what's the is the EPA or what did you is yards passing? I saw a couple things and it had us listed as the third best pass defense. And I was very confused by it. Like Max, when I said that out loud, it doesn't sound right, does it? I mean, this says third here. I don't know what I'm looking at. That's yards per game. Yeah. But then this one, I feel like I'm also looking at yards per. Oh, wait, that's postseason.

Get together, Max. If we're the number three pass defense in the postseason, that's a much different stat, but that's not the case. Because I think we're like the number 30 rush defense. The only thing I would say about that is the Lions are not like everyone else you played on the schedule. Yeah, correct. So that would be, they're just really fucking good. But, well, the Eagles pass defense is pretty good.

The Eagles' pass defense? Yes. And we put some points on them. Yeah. No, I was saying the Lions' offense. Oh, right. Your pass defense versus the Lions' offense. The Lions' offense is in that level of just... I think it's essentially the Bills and the Ravens. Those are the three teams where it does feel like...

Whenever they want to score, they're just going to score. We're going to see ultimate Dans in this showdown. Yeah. Dan Quinn, Dan Campbell, both going forward on fourth downs all the time. Two alpha dudes. And it's crazy because the history of these franchises –

at least you know recent history tress way for the commanders has been a great punter i i went out there i bought a punter's jersey he was the only bright light on the team for a while and then uh jack fox on the lions great punter now neither one of those guys is being used they were both in weird ways like the best player on each team yeah but yeah there's gonna be a ton of punts or excuse me a ton of going for it on fourth down in this game not a lot of punts uh

One thing about the Lions defense, they are the fourth worst in the NFL at allowing explosive plays. So explosives...

They allow on 12.4% of snaps. Now, the only counter to that would be they did miss Alex Anzalone for a majority of their season. He does wear the green dot. So getting everyone in the places they need to be, you saw it against the Vikings. But yeah, their defense is obviously the weakness. You could make this a shootout. And I feel like when you make a game a shootout, it really is the randomness of the game. Like if you're a nine-point underdog,

And you can score like the commanders can score. All you need is one interception, one weird thing to happen to the Lions, almost like breaking serve in tennis. Yeah. I'm going into this weekend thinking there's a very good chance that this is the end of the run. And if it is, what a great run it's been. No regrets. It's been an incredible season. But I do think that there's a path. Don't write us off. Don't write us off because if it's a one-score game –

We can go out there and win the game. And the top seeds are 11-7 in playoff games since the format changed. So it's not like getting the one seed is automatic. You're going to go to the Super Bowl. I think the Lions, I don't know. I've said all year the Lions are the best team in the NFC. Are you going to take the Commanders?

I'm going to take the Commander's spread. Okay. And probably the over. Because that's the only way the Commander's win. There's Max. Left hand up. Left hand up. Let's go, Max. Love that, Max. Let's go commies. You're the man, Max. Let's go commies. I love it, Max. You've always been on my side. Yep, always. Let's talk about your game, Max. Rams-Eagles. Eagles minus six over under 43 and a half. Let's first say, Max, how did the...

So you have karma all the way back on your side, by the way. Because we also got a little more into the story of the Eagles fan versus the Packers fan. The Packers fan, and this doesn't excuse calling a woman a cunt in the crowd, but the guy whose wife was called that, he essentially did a GoFundMe to try to get...

to go to the game and was like, I'm going to antagonize and film it.

So it kind of is one of those situations where everyone's a shithead except for the woman who just she's somehow a pawn in all this and was the one who got disrespected. She's like bait. Yeah, the guy's been taken to the game. The Packers fan sucks too. But the Packers fan did a GoFundMe probably to get all the way across the country from Wisconsin to Philadelphia to go see this game, right, Max? No, he lived an hour outside of Philadelphia. Did a GoFundMe for that? A GoFundMe to go to...

A car ride. Oh, my God. So, yeah. Doing a GoFundMe as just like a normal random dude to go to a football game is insane. Insane. Especially one down the street. Yeah. It's kind of the name of the website, though. The funniest GoFundMe I saw was a few months ago. Some guy got busted at a Phish concert for selling...

It was something like, you know, hundreds of tabs of acid, like a shitload of ecstasy, nitrous and all this stuff. And he did a GoFundMe for like legal stuff. And people were just coming. They're like, dude, he was a drug dealer. He sold those drugs. It's like, I know that, you know, we all want to party, but.

I like that. I think the GoFundMe should go to someone, you know, a kid with cancer. El Chapo does a GoFundMe. I need to re-up. Yeah. But yeah, I think you've been vindicated, especially with your class. So how'd it go? Yeah, I took the class. It was a four-hour class. I learned some good information, learned a lot about the Lincoln financial field and the security around it.

However, Big Dom heard about me taking this class and was unhappy. What'd he say? I don't know if he was unhappy. He was concerned that you got kicked out for something. Yeah, no, he thought I got kicked out of the game. Oh! And did you explain it to him? Yep, I texted. I told him the whole thing, and he was like... Wait, how'd he find out about this? He said, I was tweeting about it. I at first thought that there was an alert that...

that there was an alert that would like go to his desk or something as soon as somebody took the test, which I thought would have been way funnier. Yeah. But someone just like sent him his tweet. He was like, what happened to you this week? So Max, you were saying that you were kind of panicking and you weren't sure if you explained it correctly in your text back because you were very nervous about what to write back to big Dom. Yeah. So let's just clear the air right now and reset and,

This Eagles fan was caught on video last week saying bad stuff. Max, as a great representative of the city of Philadelphia, decided that he was going to get some good karma back, show that Philadelphia Eagles fans are passionate, but they're not all assholes. So Max took the course that the NFL offers for fans today.

who have been kicked out of the stadium to learn more about empathy and appropriate stating behavior in order to get all the good vibes back on the city of Philadelphia. Correct. I was just trying to do my part. Yeah. Trying to do my part. I do love the idea of big Dom having a fax machine next to his desk and just every person who has to sign up for it. It just, all it spit out was just a piece of paper that just said Max in your picture. He's like, what the hell? I know that's what I was really on. So watch on PMTV. But Max, what did, what did you learn?

You know, you always have to put yourself in the shoes of an opposing fan. Like, if you were going into an opposing stadium, how would you want to be treated? Curse words are not allowed at any moment. So, use of foul language, disappointing. Drinking, it was a lot of drinking. It was a lot about...

the rules of how much you can drink, what your blood alcohol level will look like if you are drinking, what can happen if your blood alcohol gets to a certain level. Stress management, that was another one. It talked a lot about stress. You need that. Yeah. That's big. It was not only if things are going poorly in your life, you can be stressed out, but also if things are going well in your life, you can be stressed out.

So that's another thing about stress, and that can cause people to say things that they shouldn't be saying. Did they do thought exercises where it's like it's third and ten and Jalen Hurts runs to the right and throws it 20 feet out of bounds? What are you thinking? No, they did not do that. Run a simulated game for you? No. You're down by 17 points and A.J. Brown's reading a book. What do you say? Yeah.

Well, that was a motivational book that keeps him locked in. Jake Elliott misses third PAT of the day. That I'm worried about. I'm so worried about. I'm worried about that as well. Andy Swan had a great idea. It was dress MMA fighters as opposing fan bases. So if you go to Lincoln Financial Field, have an MMA fighter dressed up in all Packers gear.

And then have somebody get in a fight with them. And then those guys get their ass kicked by the MMA fighter. I like that. I like that. So let's talk about the game, Max. It's got to be a Saquon game. Jalen Hurts has to get out of the concussion protocol. And your defense has to win this game. Because I don't know about your offense. Assess those.

Disagree it's going to be cold. You're just going to pound the rock. Our offense will be good. I did have that question. How long do you have to live in warm weather before you get soft? Because Matthew Stafford, he played in his only cold game, only game under 40 degrees in the last three years was the game against the Jets a month ago where they won 19-9 and they did not look good.

He obviously played in Detroit, had to play in NFC North, go to Soldier Field, go to Lambeau. Is...

Is there an amount of time that you get soft? Yes. How quickly? Two years. Two summers. Especially the older you get. The older you get, the joints, they don't do as well in the cold. Yeah, two summers. Your first summer, you're like, you know those videos of when they have a monkey and it sees the outdoors for the first time because it's been kept in a lab for its entire life? Yeah. It's never been in the grass and it's like, oh shit, this is awesome. That's your first summer in warm weather. You're like, this is incredible. Holy shit.

You lived in Texas. I love it here. As you were saying that. Yeah. You know from first-hand experience here. Yeah, yeah. No, I got real soft. I got real soft over the course of like

nine years down there to the point where I moved to New York. I was like, what the fuck is going on? And now it's the flip where I think tomorrow it's going to be 40 degrees in Chicago. It's like, I might wear shorts. Yeah. Now I'm hard. Yeah. I was soft. Now I'm hard. But I think after your second summer, then you just expect nice weather all the time. Yeah. So that will be big. Matthew Stafford older doesn't, you know, doesn't play well in cold weather.

The other thing I like about this matchup, Max, is the Rams are somehow worse than the Eagles in starting games, which is pretty hard to do. But the Rams are 30th in first quarter scoring and 23rd in first half scoring. So that's, you know, the Eagles have started slow.

They shouldn't have... Well, I mean, they got a fumble seven seconds into the game. Yeah, that's the opposite of starting. I understand, but that fumble doesn't happen. They have maybe three points at most in the first half. Great touchdown pass, Jahan Dotson. Great touchdown pass. It did happen. But your offense looked like shit in the first half. Did it not? They scored in the first two minutes of the game. Yeah. It was 10-0 like that. Mm-hmm. Defense looked great. I think your defense is going to win this game. And I also...

Vic Fangio against, it's a small sample size, but he played them this year. The Rams scored 20 points. And then the famous game in 2018 when the Rams were just ripping through everyone and they came to Soldier Field and Vic Fangio was the DC and they scored six points. I think Vic Fangio is going to have, he's going to dial some shit up. N'Kobe Dean being out is a worry. That's really my only worry on the defensive side of the ball. We're going to have Oren Burks, who did not look great. He's the one who had the...

the fumble on the kickoff to start the game, but defensively, he did not look great last year or last week. And then Jeremiah Trotter Jr. is, is rumored to be getting a bunch of snaps this weekend. And he's a rookie and hasn't gotten like any playing time. So that's, N'Kobi Dean's like the play caller, the, you know, middle linebacker that,

He's the leader on the team, and not having him is going to be worrisome for the defense, but I still like our guys. I think your offensive line will do a great job going up against one of the Rams' strengths. If you were to say Rams' defensive line, probably one of the better units out there, but the Eagles' offensive line, I think, can neutralize them a little bit. Are you ever nervous on punts? I know you love Cooper DeGene, but are you nervous the way that he fields punts? Yes, every single time.

We watch the game together on Sunday. Every single time, I just say, just catch it. Just catch it. Don't... Punts are the... Returning punts is the scariest play in football for me. Because I feel it has to be...

The highest percentage play of turnover. Yeah. Like it's very easy to turn the ball over on a punt and it completely changes the game because it's 60 yards of field position or whatever that number is. Just hold on to the football, get the ball back to the offense, run the rock, win the game. Play good defense, don't turn the ball over, run the rock, win the game. Love that. Keys to the game. Are you going to go hair down or up?

You won against the Packers with hair down. But I put it up right before halftime because they went into that lull. Oh, so you got to go up. So I think maybe start. I think the first couple drives are going to be down. Can I make a request? Yep. No pigtails. Overalls?

Nailed it. Come on. Yep. You have the Eagles overalls. The people want the Eagles overalls. Everybody's been asking for the Eagles. You teased him last year, and he never wore the overalls. You got to wear the overalls. Yeah, but if they lose, think of how bad of a look that will be if they lose. Exactly. For you, it'll be a good look. But Philly fans will be so mad at me. So you're just never going to wear these overalls? No, I'll wear them.

No, I don't think that you will. You have to wear them now or never because you're not going to want to wear them in the Super Bowl. Yeah, you got to work them in. You should have worked them in the regular season. That was a big mistake. Yeah, I know. I should have. But there were so many times that I thought about it during the regular season and I was like...

Well, what if they lose? Then it's a bad look. Here's what you should do. You should wear the overalls and maybe wear a hoodie over it for the first half. I don't hate that. Yeah. I don't hate that. Work it in slowly. Work it in. Yeah. Okay. I like that. Steal it out. I like that. If things are going well, you go overalls. Then you have the overalls for the NFC Championship. If Philly fans listening to this are mad at me and I get an overwhelming...

response of do not wear the overalls. I can't wear the overalls. No, I think you wear them, put the hoodie on over, and if it's going good, then you can demonstrate. And then if it's going poorly, you can also take the hoodie off to switch up the juju. It gives you multiplicity. Multiplicity in your attack. I like it. Complimentary overalls. Okay, the last game. Best game. Ravens and Bills.

Bills are underdogs. They're 1.5 underdogs. The over-under is 51.5. I'm so excited for this game. I've been trying. I think everyone in this room wants the Bills to win because it would be awesome if they went to the Super Bowl. I think the Ravens are probably the better team overall. So I've been trying to make a case for it in my head that the Bills can win this game. Here's my case.

The Bills defense in the first matchup was not... They didn't have guys. They didn't have Milano, Johnson, who I think is in concussion protocol right now, and Bernard. All those guys should help with the run. Zay Flowers looks like he's not going to play. And the last thing is, the Ravens defense has been incredible in the last half of the season, right? I did look back, and in the last five games...

This is DVO way who they played. They played the Browns who the 32nd defense or sorry, offense. The Texans are the 26th. The Steelers, the 19th, the Giants, the 28th and the Eagles, the 13th. They're only loss. The bills are obviously a top five offense, uh,

And so maybe there's a little inflation in numbers. I don't fully believe everything I'm saying. I was just trying to make the case. Okay, here's another bit of data point for you. I'm all over the weather this weekend. Eight degrees in Buffalo, in Orchard Park. The coldest game that Lamar Jackson's ever played. Guess what it was? 35. No, 27. Oh. So kind of cold. But this is eight degrees. It's very different. And he said he wasn't going gloves. Oh.

Also, Lamar, in their earlier matchup this season, the temperature was like 60, and he was wearing a hoodie and a beanie for it. Yeah. I don't know that Lamar loves the cold. Broward County. Broward County. I think that it is a very different team that the Buffalo Bills have right now. Home field advantage is going to make a huge difference. I have no idea who's going to win the game. Absolutely no idea. I've been trying to figure it out, too. I think I'm going to bet the over. I'm going to bet for football. I'm going to root for good football. Okay.

No idea who's going to win this game. I don't know if they can stop Derrick Henry. The Ravens are a much more complete team. The Bills have Josh Allen as an all-pro, nobody else as an all-pro. But that said, I don't know. I feel like the Bills are playing their best football right now. I just want both quarterbacks to play out of their mind and have one of those classic games where it just comes down to whoever has the ball last. Yeah.

I'm so excited for this game. Hank, do you think the Ravens are going to kill him? No. Oh. I think the Bills can win. I want the Bills to win. Yeah. But I do think the Ravens, in totality, are the better team. And Lamar's been out of his mind. Lamar's probably going to win another MVP. Might be his best season ever. He's an incredible, incredible quarterback. And last week in a playoff game was awesome. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm rooting for the Bills, but this is going to be a tough game. I was shocked to find out that Jim Nance... I think the weather matters more in the playoffs than people give it credit for, to PST's point. And Josh Allen... He loves that cold. So Jim Nance is, quote, stoked...

for this game. Oh, shit. I never thought that Jim Nance was capable of being stoked. Did he say that with a Stussy shirt on? He said it twice. He said, I am stoked for this matchup. That is the Cali in him. It is. How old are Jim Nance's kids? That's definitely... He just found out about Stokes. His kid is like 12. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and he lives in Cali. Tony? No, I think he does have...

I think he remarried and has a younger kid, and he's probably a Cali teen. Tony, I'm stoked. No cap. Bruh. Imagine if he dropped a bruh. Lamar has an incredible run. He's like, bruh. Bruh. He did not just do that, fam. And Lamar Jackson, bruh. He's different. He's different, Tony. You just don't know how to spell Jim Nance's name, Max. Daughter born in 2014, son born in 2016.

Okay, so he's got a 10-year-old and a 9-year-old. That's getting there. I mean, 9 is a 9-year-old, maybe skating. Yeah. He's getting those words. Stoked?

Yeah, Tony, you know, he's famous for calling plays before they happen. Last week, he called that they were going to get this game at the end of the last game. He's like, can't wait to be up in Buffalo next week. And I don't know if the network executives got bullied into making that the Nance. No, it was always going to be Jim Nance and Tony Romo for this game. Always. What were you going to say? I don't know if kids still say stoked. Oh, they don't? That seems like kind of...

I don't know what they do in California, so maybe... I would assume that Stoked is probably out of vernacular. I'm not saying that I'm in vernacular. Yeah, not in Cali. Cali, they say Stoked. I was assuming that Stoked was big in the 90s, maybe early 2000s. That's what I'm thinking. Then it went out, and I was assuming that maybe it just started to come back. I think Cali is just part of the language.

Definitely. Some Cali AWLs hit us up. Do you still say stoked? Because I feel like they still say hella too. Hella stoked. This Twitter account that just covers the world of ski lifts said so stoked to be adding Norway. That sounds like a universal. I could also see Jim Nance being big time into skiing. Yeah. He probably spends a month in Aspen each offseason. Stoked. Okay. Okay.

I'm so excited for this game. After the game, a tribute to our darling Jake Marsh, I predict sportsmanship of the year. I predict the handshake between Lamar and Josh is going to include some form of now go out there and win the big one. Win it all. Go take care of it. Go beat the bad man. Go beat the bad man. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Should we do our parlays? Because we have them. Very close last week with the Jaden Daniels.

the kneel down that hurt but we are you guys are going to do the commanders lines we'll do the Eagles Rams DraftKings the NFL teams playing to see who's the king of the gridiron getting on the playoff action see who's the king of the end zone at DraftKings Sportsbook an official sportsbook partner of the NFL playoffs DraftKings has been the number one place to bet touchdowns all season long and NFL playoffs aren't keeping them out of the end zone they're going to

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Okay, I'll give you ours. Max and I put this together.

it is a AJ Brown. Anytime touchdown over 35 and a half Dallas Goddard receiving yards, the Philadelphia Eagles to win the game.

And Kenneth Gainwell over 9.5 rushing yards. It's a four-leg parlay, and it is plus 9.50 in the DraftKings Sportsbook. I like that. How much for Kenny? Kenny, over 9.5. Okay. I like it. Over 9.5. Hank and I put together a juicy one. Jameer Gibbs, anytime touchdown. Yep. Zach Ertz, anytime touchdown. Yep. Austin Eckler, 25-plus receiving yards. Plus 800. Plus 800. I like it. I love it. Love it. Love it.

Points bonanza. Let's get some games going, boys. So excited. So excited for this. Bills Ravens. I'm just going to soak in it. Lay down in it. We need an upset Saturday. Okay. For the vibes. Gotcha. For your bets. All right. Let's get to our interviews. Everyone's been saying these playoffs have sucked. It's just the first round. If we get an upset Saturday, we're weekends made. That's crazy. Okay. Let's get to our interviews. We got Chris Long and then Adam Schefter.

We're going to get to Chris Long in a second, but before we do, he's brought to you by Kevin's Natural Foods. I've got the Sichuan chicken right here. It's super easy, takes about seven minutes. It's nice stir fry. It's a stir fry kit that only takes seven minutes and it's delicious and it's healthy too. You know that you feel your best when you eat well, but life is hectic and it's hard to find a healthy option that's quick and easy. That's where Kevin's Natural Foods comes in.

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two-time Super Bowl champion Chris Long. You can see him on his podcast, which is incredible. Anyone who loves ball should be watching, listening to the green light with Chris Long. He's also doing a bunch of media inside the NFL. He's everywhere. He's everywhere. It is Chris Long. Chris, we've been trying to get you on for a couple weeks. It was my fault on a lot of the scheduling. No, no.

Well, that was kind of my fault, too. I was like, oh, I have a procedure. I'm going under. Yeah. And I showed up to the doctor's office. They're like, no, it's just a consultation. Yeah. You didn't eat for an entire day before. Dude. Oh, just a mess over here. But it's good to see you all. Yes. Great. First guest in part of my take history. Right. Yeah. I know. I was going to point that out, but I don't want to my own whore. That's a big deal. It's a fact. So bad. Why did you ever come back? Because.

You guys became really popular. Yeah, that's a good answer. Nine year anniversary coming up. I feel like you came on part of my take and we were so bad that you were like, I have to start a podcast because these fucking assholes are doing what I'm way better. Dude, I just remember it was so fun because like we got my dad on. I like I was doing it on my phone, I think, or maybe my laptop. It was like 2000 and what? What year was that? Yeah.

So we were in the dark ages of technology, but I was doing it in my living room. My dad came to the door mid-interview, and I got Howie on the pod, and I was like, hey, it's the guys from Pardon My Take, and he was like, oh, cool. It's a podcast that doesn't exist yet. Awesome. Yeah, you're going to be smart, and now he's been on your show. Yeah, and now full circle. All right, so let's talk some ball because you know the NFL better than anyone. You know playoff football better than anyone.

I want to go through every game and we already taped our preview. The Texans versus the Chiefs. And I have to say, we didn't really give a path for the Texans. So I don't know if you see this game differently, but we didn't give a full path for the Texans to win this game. We just kind of were like Patrick Mahomes is Patrick Mahomes. And this is what he does, especially in the divisional round.

I hope it's not a blowout as a fan because if it is, you're going to be like, damn, we're going to have maybe, maybe, sorry, PFT, maybe two blowouts Saturday. I don't know. I'm hoping that both of them are close, honestly. But here's the path. The path is now they've got Aziz Alshayer back who is legitimately a leader for them and patrolling the middle of the field.

Next to nobody's as fast as him at the linebacker position. You also get Christian Harris. They played together for the first time, I think, all year last week. So two really good players in the middle. I like the corners. The corners played really well. And also for the Chiefs in that game, like they just got Hollywood Brown back. Right. And to me, that gave them a new look that maybe Houston wasn't ready for. So not saying it's going to be close.

But the path is if they can take care of the Mahomes scrambles, which they didn't in that first game that killed them, they can keep it closer. They had a chance in that game. You remember when they got the ball at midfield after Tank Dell got hurt? Yep. And they were all just like – they were crushed. You know, that really – some injuries you can kind of move on from. I felt like that one kind of killed them. But they got the ball at midfield with a chance after stopping Kansas City on fourth down to take the lead, I believe.

And they weren't ready for the moment. They botched the screen. Schultz drops an out. And you're like, you know what? This Kansas City team's been here in this game a thousand times. Houston has not. And I think that was really apparent watching in the first game. We'll see if they got better. Yeah, we always make the case because people will say, oh, Kansas City's lucky and they get the flags and all that stuff. They don't, though. Yeah, we've always been on the side of –

It's not luck. It's the fact that they've been in all these situations, and if you make a single mistake, they will pounce on it. And that's the difference between a championship team and a team that's just a playoff team.

That's right. And I think also when you watch like Kansas City's offense, and it might be different now, they sort of open things up a little bit more. I think part of that is having Joe at tackle, Joe Tooney, who makes a big difference like that left tackle spot was a revolving door. They couldn't figure it out. At some point, they said, Hey, we'll put a guard out here who's pretty good. He's an all pro guard, but we'll put him out here because we're going to prioritize our best player being able to operate.

And so I think what they were doing to that point was let's get into third and manageable, which they're so good at. If they're in third and three or third and four, you feel like you can't get off the field.

And so I think that's the key to the game. If I'm Houston, you kind of say, fuck it. Like, let's be aggressive early or early downs, like getting behind the sticks a little bit. If they burn us, they burn us. But we'll see. I think the slow start is another, you know, little hopeful nugget for them. You know, the fact that the Chiefs haven't played and it feels like a month. And, you know, if you remember the last team to jump them in divisional round off a bye was Houston. It's a totally different team now.

But you remember that game, coincidentally, on the way to New Orleans, that trip we were just talking about. Yeah, that was 24-0 in the second quarter. I watched her on the plane on the way to New Orleans. And then it was immediately over after that moment. So as a defensive end, you were talking about keeping them in the pocket, limiting the scrambling stuff. Has there ever been a game plan that you've had going into a game where you're like, okay, we've got a great idea of how we need to limit this quarterback, and you get really detailed with your preparation, and then you get in the game and –

It absolutely does not work. Yeah, like any time we ever played a running quarterback. The coaches – I mean, and now it's more the norm where guys, if you can't move, there's not many like you. And so I think more guys are like Jay – not many like Jayden Daniels, but where third and short, some element of quarterback run is a threat. And I think with Mahomes, it's very –

It's very unique because he drifts if you watch him and it makes playing offensive line for him a little bit difficult. It's like best job in the world, but he might be at nine yards. He might be at 11. He might be at 12. He's going to step up. So rushing him is not as simple as like, you know, staying down the middle and power rushing a tackle, which can piss a defensive end off when all week you hear we got to cage this guy. Right. Which is basically like we got to keep him in the pocket and

That kind of takes your fastball away. And a lot of times at the end of those games anyways, you get your throat ripped out by some quarterback that you gave him too long to throw the ball. And then the D.C. is yelling at you like, why didn't you rush him? So it's frustrating. And then you'll play guys who do the read option you see like Lamar. You'd have coaches that would say, hey, just blow up the mesh. Get both of them. Yeah, just tackle two guys. Physically impossible. Yeah. So just having a running quarterback –

You allot so much time during the week to things that might not even happen, you know, to scenarios that might not come up. And that can take you away from doing the meat and potatoes. Makes sense. So you sound like you're on the Texans, too.

Well, inevitably, I'm not going to bet at like a nine point favorite. That's not fun. Right. Right. Like, you know, I mean, I'll probably end up doing something stupid like a teaser or some dumb shit like that. So that's actually not about tease what you would tease him down to a point point and a half.

You could tease Kansas City down. Yeah. Then that means you probably got to find a dance partner, and that's probably Detroit. But Vegas knows a lot of teasers Saturday are going to be just that. Yeah, that's going to be everyone's. Somebody's going to keep it close Saturday.

And I don't know. It could be this team. I don't know. It could be your guys. Yeah. So let's talk about that game. I gave my keys to the game already. You probably know a little bit better. You're going to get a little more granular than I did. My keys to the game were basically just kill everybody. You said fuck them up. Yeah, fuck them up, kill everybody, and then Jaden Daniels. To beat the Detroit Lions, you have to be the Detroit Lions. Right. You got to go for it every fourth down, right? Which you guys are very good at.

I mean, like you were 87% the other night before you got stopped. So it's probably down like 85. But on the season, I think the key to this game is y'all got to get stops in the red zone. Like Detroit's going to move the ball.

Can you get them to be like 2 of 5 in the red zone? There was a game last year versus Vegas where they totally shit the bed in the red zone. Can you recreate that issue for them? I don't know that you can. It's just going to come down to being aggressive. And if Aaron Glenn wants to play so much man, I actually have a lot of faith in Jaden. You're probably going to have to do a lot of spy. And you can't take Anzalone out of coverage. He's too good.

You know, is it Jack Campbell? Is it somebody else? Like, I don't know. But Jaden Daniels with his legs. I kind of feel like we're just building a path for the underdogs here. Yeah. The path for Detroit is bludgeoning them. Yeah. You know, like, David Montgomery, he's on track to play. Yeah. Crazy. It's like nuts. Like...

This team is so tough. Everything they've been dealt this year, they've just dealt with it. I mean, and Dan Campbell, you guys, I know you guys love him, but as a football player, the longer he coaches this team, the more I'm impressed with him. I mean, they really have not flinched all year long. I got a question about the Detroit defense, and you can explain this a lot better than we know that the green dot is important.

Alex Anzalone comes back week 18. He puts a green dot back on. Explain it to us why it's so important and how much it can change if you lose the guy who is your defensive captain getting everyone in the right spot. Well, look, you get home field advantage. That's a big deal, right? It's a big deal for a lot of reasons, but it's really loud in a playoff game at home.

And you talk about communication. Like I remember being in St. Louis and we never played in the playoffs, but there were a hundred instances of me screaming at James Laranitis, like, what the fuck is the call?

Am I stemming like what's happening here? Like there he's like a he's like a service agent on the phone, like a bunch of people are calling him at the same time. Like whether it's me, the other D tackle, somebody needs a call in the secondary. We need to we need to figure out what that call was tagged with. There's just a ton of like communication issues. But then not only that, like he's a great cover guy. Right. And in the NFL now, you know, we kind of went through this thing where like backers not important.

running back's not important. They're important again, but backers are really important. You play, and we're not talking about the commanders so much, but any of these like souped up West Coast offenses, you

Like you've got to have guys in the middle that are rangy and that can cover. I mean, like the Eagles, we're going to talk about them in a second. They lose the Kobe Dean in a game where, you know, Matt Stafford is going to be trying to chunk the intermediate part of the field all day long. And you see it like when they played Minnesota, Minnesota gives up a lot of chunks in the middle.

having a dominant backer in the middle of the field. Like imagine if you have like, I'm not comparing Anzalone, but to illustrate the importance of the position, Fred Warner changes the entire game. Right. You know, and I think like for the Bills, when we get to that game, one thing we'll talk about is they were down three backers in that first game. So it matters, not just having the green dot, but having good players in the middle of the field. Yeah. I think any chance the Lions break out the Todd Bowles defense, the double quarterback spy. Yeah.

where Todd did that at one point I've never seen that before I don't know I don't know why I it doesn't really make a whole lot of sense it didn't work I don't know why Todd Bowles did a lot of things he did down the stretch like I was really disappointed in that Bucks team like I kind of you know when you when you pick a team to win the division you kind of get married to them and you fall in love with them and you justify all their mistakes and you're like well that wasn't that bad with what they did in Dallas with the season on the line like they're better than that

But in the biggest game, they kind of pissed down their leg with procedural stuff. And the point I want to make is the commanders, they've won a lot of close games this year, including that game. I mean, when they beat Chicago, Stevenson was being an idiot. When they beat Atlanta, there was bad clock management by Raheem Morris. And then last week, the Bucs with the third and inches, with the jet sweep that they drop on the ground, like,

There's a lot of teams that have been fucking it up, not taking anything away from the commanders in close games. Detroit doesn't do that. They're as well coached on both sides of the ball as any team in the league. Are you worried when you talk about the red zone? Obviously, I assume that Dan Campbell's going to keep coaching the way he's coached and anything fourth and four or less he's going to go for. Are you in the mindset? Because I've seen people be like, oh, I can't wait until Dan Campbell fucks this up again in the playoffs.

I've been a big believer in like, dude, he knows what he's doing. And it's also not a secret to his team. Like I think when we're sitting on our couch, like what is he doing? It's going to be so deflating. Those guys in the huddle, they know like what he's going to do. So they're prepared for it if they don't get it.

Dude, I think it's twofold. Like, number one, the schematic part of it, which is like the plays they're calling on fourth down are working. Even when they don't execute it, the plays were there last year in those big moments against San Francisco. It's like Shane Steichen last year with the division on the line giving the ball to Gardner Minshew and throwing the ball in the flat. Right. And everybody second guesses the call, but it's the execution of the call. So the right calls are being made. And I think also you listen to his players.

After that game, their faith in his way of doing things was unwavering. And so, like, that's a big part of it. And I liken it to, like, if you have a dad who walks around beating guys up. And, like, if he turns down a fight, you're like, Dad, wait. That's not who you are. I feel like every time Dan stares...

a fourth down in the eyes like it's like a game of chicken and all his kids are watching and if he turns it down they all look at him like what the fuck was that about yeah this game is like literally my Dan could beat up your Dan yeah my Dan could beat up your Dan yeah exactly what

From a defensive perspective, I know people will say, oh, the defense must be deflated when they don't get the fourth down. I feel like the defense knows what the offense is going to do. It's complimentary that they know you're going to probably steal a couple and you might have a couple where you get put in a bad field position. Well, that's what it comes down to for me is when you play Detroit and being on a defense knowing, it's a lot of the reason I think Greg Olson has spoken to this, decisions to force a team to

to drive the length of the field or have to kick a field goal at the end of the game. Like what you do offensively dictates the tone of the next possession. The tone of a possession where an offense has four downs is uneasy for a defense. Right. You know, like everything you do is different. And I think you're always in that mode playing them and it can create a lot of discomfort. That's why I think like early down pressure, you know, like when they play Buffalo, the reason Buffalo won that game is because they got them off the field like twice in the first half.

And if you're to believe that the commanders are going to beat man coverage and run up some points, then all you have to do in this scenario to keep it close is get them off the field once or twice. The way you do that, in my opinion, is time up a blitz when they're going to play action.

and get Jared when he turns his back and try to cook something up on second down, get him in third and 12, get him in second and 13, something like that, and then you got a shot. Yeah. I mean, it's going to be a very tough battle. The Lions are obviously a great team. I think Dan Campbell has done a great job

playing into the whole macho man dan thing and he throws like a lot of red meat out to the press a lot he's like yeah i do push-ups in the shower that's where i work out i know what he said yeah he said he gets his workouts in when he's in the shower he says they you know he'll bite a kneecap off we're gonna drag you down we're gonna drown you i heard that i think i'm more i'm more concerned with like walking into the shower try to get a shower if i'm like the o-line coach i think and dan's doing naked push-ups in the shower i think he means like at home that he works not in the

communal. But again, I don't necessarily buy into everything that he says like that because I think he does a very good job of playing this persona and then hoping people underestimate him. And he's a super smart guy because if you look at how aggressive he is, he actually just goes for it when you're supposed to go for it based on math. So like he knows those numbers. He's the guy that like, you know,

What you see is what you get, but there's also a totally different element to him as you just talked about. Think of who he learned from. Sean Payton's one of the most aggressive guys in the NFL. Faking a punt last week, stuff like that, the Super Bowl, the onside kick. So,

He's got that like Sean Payton edge to him. And he's also got the intellect that comes with Sean Payton's one of the greatest coaches to ever coach, in my opinion. And he's so ball smart. He got all those situational nuggets from him. And then he puts his very physical like caveman edge on it. And you kind of I like a team to a Ferrari with mud tires.

like they're they can do they can do anything you go four-wheel drive they can go 200 miles an hour and that's what the ben johnson element gives them the offensive line's awesome everything they do looks the same it's all in sync uh they're incredible yeah but they could lose two coordinators yeah yeah good point they could lose two coordinators all right so uh sunday what's wrong with jalen hurts what's wrong with the eagles offense

Well, in this scenario, I thought it was a game plan. I thought the passing concepts look like last year and any Eagles fans know what I'm talking about. Is it like spacing very vanilla? Not enough quick game. But I also think the game kind of played out in a way where they knew when they jumped on that football and turned it into six in the first five minutes of the game.

Jordan Love can't hang. He might be dinged. Our defense is, I mean, they're physical. They're really good. And I think they just kind of played the game out in a way that suited that, to be honest, very shitty game plan. Now, they're not going to be so lucky this week if they do that.

In my notes here, I got written down McVay's script versus Philly's slow starts. Yeah. That is it. You know, like to me, how do you start this game? And I think if you look at the second half, especially that first game, Brandon Fisk is like 290. He's a great player. Love him. Turner, great player. Love him. 297.

The ends, they're really good rushers. I don't know if they can set an edge for 60 minutes. And, you know, we saw that last game with the interior, that defensive line. Landon Dickerson, Juergens. Juergens is fucking huge, man. You know...

He's standing next to the other guys. I was just there last week. He's standing next to the other guys. He looks small, but he's like a WWE wrestler. Like, he's got that kind of build. And, you know, the guards are big, powerful. The tackles are big and powerful. I would just lean on these guys. And so that's it. The concerns I have is, like, with N'Kobe Dean down, as I alluded to,

Stafford in the middle of the field, if he's got time, I think there could be some uncomfortable moments in past defense. Where's your heart at in this game, Chris? This is the Chris Longbow. Yeah, it is. The Rams, Eagles. My heart's with the Eagles, man. It's super weird because playing there the last two years of my career, when St. Louis cut me after eight years,

It felt to me like, all right, well, I am a Ram and I do feel a lot of pride when I watch like Jared verse play or not in the cubby damn all over the place or Byron young or the two interior guys I just talked about.

I take pride in like, oh, there's another group in horns like our D line back in the day. Like there is a sense of pride there. And I still talk to people in that organization. I have no bad blood. But when the team moves across the country, it's just it doesn't feel like home as much. You don't get out there. And then obviously being a St. Louis Ram, I'm always real cognizant of like they have Super Bowl parties without the game on. That's how much they hate Stan Kroenke and the L.A. Rams and the concept of it.

And for me, I don't have that same vitriol, but I was actually supposed to go out last week and be legend of the game. And of course, the game gets moved, forest fires, whole thing. So that got rain checked. And then I ended up in Philly. When I go to Philly, man,

It just feels like home. You know, it's like the most recent thing I did. And that city, like what we did there, excuse me for really enjoying being there. Yeah, it makes sense. It makes perfect sense. You walk around that stadium, Bo told a story on our pod.

this week where like it's legit like the people in the yellow jackets are like wherever you want to go i don't know they want to hear that like dom's like where do you want to go come on boo he walked me in the locker room supposedly beau was in there before the game sat beau down in the coach's locker room gave him a cannoli he has like a stack of cannolis in his locker big dom does that's so awesome oh and and and he just pulled out a cannoli he's like hey just you and kelsey just take a seat wait chris will be down here soon so

I just, the feeling you get when you go back, it's hard for me to say my heart's with anybody but the Eagles, but I think it's going to be a great game. And I think Matt Stafford is one of the best quarterbacks left in the damn playoffs. Yeah. Yeah. Future Hall of Fame. He looked good last week. He looked kind of shaky in December, but what we saw last week, like my concerns with Matt Stafford, I think they're gone. Yeah, I agree. I mean, him playing outside, that's kind of a different story. But yeah, he looked so good last week that now I'm like, yeah, the Rams could do it.

They're scary, man. This is the one matchup for them. If they can win this game, look out. Because the one matchup I worried about for them was versus this offensive line in Saquon. Yeah. Okay, quick break from our interview with Chris Long. Talk to you about our friends at Doritos. With Patrick Holmes' help, Doritos just revealed the top three ads that are still in the running to win the...

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Doritoscrash.com and cast their vote for who they think is the winning ad. Will it be Abduction, Barbershop, or Charades? 11 days left to vote. Vote for the next Super Bowl ad at Doritoscrash.com and go get some Doritos. We've got the Cool Ranch here. What is this? Sriracha. Golden Sriracha. Really good. Just tried those. The Cool Ranch. The Goat Chip. The Goat Chip. So go right now. Visit at Doritoscrash.com and vote for your favorite ad.

And thank you to Doritos. We're going to eat Doritos every single day because I love Doritos. All right, now here's more Chris Long. How much does... We were talking about it when we were doing our preview that we don't probably take into account cold weather enough when it comes to these playoff games. How much does it really suck and who does it suck most for?

The fast guys. Really? I think, you know, like we got more meat on our bones. And for me, as a guy who was like quick, athletic, but not fast, I

I always felt like when it got cold, if I could just run the same speed, then I was as fast as the other guys. And I just think playoff football is better in the cold. Like, I'm one of these outdoor freaks. I agree. Like, you know, I'm watching the Miami Dolphins play, and, you know, it's complicated for me anyways, in Kansas City last year. And everybody's like, it's inhumane. Like, people are getting frostbite. People lost limbs. I'm like, hey, that was incredible. It's just...

There's something about it. And yeah, I'm a little twisted. I played football, but where you see people have to adapt to like totally unnatural shit and how they respond, like, you know, and in some ways the best team doesn't always win in that circumstance, but that's what it's about. And football is like reacting to whatever's on the plate that day. And I think it's cool as hell to like turn on TV in January and see smoke coming out of people's helmets and shit.

you know, to see quarterbacks wearing gloves and like, I do think it affects the fast guys more. I think the big guys like it. And then we always have our conversations about like, do you wear sleeves? Do you not wear sleeves? That sort of thing. Yeah. So is Derek Henry a big guy or is he a fast guy? I think he's both. Yeah. That's a problem. Unfortunately, he's both. I was just looking at Brian Bolldinger's social about, you know, them running Wildcat. And it was like,

All 22 end zone. And it was from Pittsburgh side. So he's the furthest guy from the camera.

but he's dwarfing Patrick Queen and Landon Roberts. He looks so unnaturally damn big, and he doesn't slow down, man. And so, yeah, they got to have 11 hats to the ball this weekend. Yeah. So the Bills linebackers you talked about, it's a big difference from the first time they played. How do they slow down Derrick Henry? You have to commit to it. I mean, it's like, listen, I understand last week, I think part of running Lamar,

is to put something on tape where you're saying early in the game, hey, we're not always going to give. Like, he's going to pull this ball. And that happened at the cost of, you know, eight, ten quarterback runs in the first half. I would force them to pull the ball in the option, you know, when all things are considered. Like, it's 50-50. There are times where I saw Pittsburgh and their linebackers up on the line. It's really hard to have the quarterback, especially Lamar,

from a place on the field like that you got to be really careful about where you have your second level defenders popping off to handle the option on the pole I would be crashing on Derrick Henry and forcing the key to the entire game to run the ball 15 times like you know the attrition of that you never know and so I would force Lamar to run the football um I think obviously you're gonna have to play some base but you feel a lot better about it wasn't just Milano

They were down Bernard. They were down Taron Johnson, who's a really important box player. He's a little guy, but he'll play big. And so, you know, when you run out Spector, Dorian Williams, and Morrow, I think it was, to play linebacker against the Baltimore Ravens, and the first play of the game is a trap for 87 yards, that changes everything. The mood of the game, the tone of the game, how you call the game. It was like Baltimore got whatever they wanted after that.

and a lot of it is because they just play the numbers game. If you're going to stack the box, they're going to play the numbers game outside. I think Munkin's done a great job with the RPOs, with screens, jet motion. So it's not just the slugfest. You also have to tackle on the perimeter. But if Zay's down, and Orlovsky pointed this out on ESPN, good guy knows ball. He does. I love Dan. But he pointed this out. With Zay Flowers down, not only can you play more man –

But the run fits are better off for that. So I think this team's changed a lot. And for Baltimore fans, I'll say this is the best team in the playoffs coming in. Yeah. And they played fantastic down the stretch. They've changed a lot too. You know, Hamilton moving to safety, putting Washington in safety, putting the fire out at safety was huge. I think your guy, Eddie Jackson was there at some point this year. Yeah. And in one of those games, it was like,

man, the safety play was bad. So they improved that. I think another thing is, you know, that game was one of those games for Buffalo where it became apparent they got to go get an outside guy to pair with Coleman. And so they get out and they get Cooper. They

They don't really have a number one. I think their number one is Shakir. Agreed. I think he's the most important guy. And he left that game in the second quarter, I believe it was. So he didn't get a full day's work. I'm not making excuses for the Bills. But I think even Harbaugh said it. You can throw that first matchup out the window. And usually you can't. I remember 2018, we're defending the Super Bowl. We started 4-6. And we played down in New Orleans. They beat us like...

like random mules. It was like 47, seven and Peyton didn't let off the gas pedal, fucking ran the score up and we play him a second time. It's a low scoring ball game. And we're a couple big mistakes away from winning that game and going back to the NFC championship. So,

things change a lot in three months. Yeah. So, and I also think Sean McDermott's great defensive coach. Like I think he will, he will figure out something to a wrinkle to throw at the Ravens. When you are talking about like a wrinkle, so to speak, let's even go back week 18, the Vikings and the Lions. It felt like the Lions had a, something they hadn't shown before. And they did a great job with Sam Darnold. How long, when you go in with a game plan, you're like, we're going to throw something at them that they haven't seen. How long does it,

usually last where it's like you know until it's like all right now they're gonna be able to adjust well if it's one thing it can it can it can be fixed pretty quickly on the sideline on tablets and usually that was above my pay grade when i was a player you know they were usually arguing about it in the linebacker circle or whatever it's like this motion means this or hey they're trying to out leverage us doing this and you make one adjustment but i think a lot of times

It can really, that counterpunch can knock you off your feet for the entire game or the halftime. I felt like Detroit, you brought that up, and the Rams took that same game plan. Yep.

to play Minnesota. And, you know, I think when you watch Minnesota, for instance, they knew that like the longer in the down you go, the more dangerous Minnesota is your zones expand. They find creases, but they also know that, that as good as Darnold has been statistically against the blitz, this offensive line was in bad shape. Um,

And so I think you come into the game and you're worried about protection, but you don't think they're going to they're going to blitz that much. And I think then you go play L.A. and it's in the back of your head. And this is what makes you know what happened in Minnesota. So like it wasn't going to change. They knew coming to that game, the same thing could happen.

And they didn't call their best game, but it still happened. And so sometimes it's just like, hey, we got you where we want you. And we're going to find out early in the game if you can block the edges. Like the other night, there was a sack on Sam in the first quarter where it was like a sandwich. Yeah. And both of those ends just fucking ran through the tackles.

That's like a code red thing. Right. And sometimes you don't know how Brian O'Neill's anchor is going to hold up. You don't know how the left tackle's anchor is going to hold up. You should have from the first matchup.

But, yeah, it can really knock you off your feet. That's my favorite – one of my favorite parts about football is, like, Sean McDermott can throw a wrinkle in there. You can even steal one possession, kind of going back to, like, your – you know, the Commander's Lions game. You can get them off the field once and a half. That could be the difference if you're – especially in this game where it's Josh and Lamar who could score every possession if they're playing well. I think it could be a lower-scoring game. I don't know. Like, you know, I think for Buffalo –

The key is going to be being able to run the football, obviously. And I think they've done a great job. Both of these teams, you kind of get lost in the shuffle talking about Baltimore, who does a great job, obviously. But Buffalo, and shout out to their offensive line coach, Aaron Cromer, and that whole group, like they've done a great job. And they were in a lot of gap scheme last week and just kicked it. If you didn't watch the Denver game,

and most of us did and i was drunk and tailgating watching but then when i went back i was like holy shit yeah it was like and this is an example like oh early and often in the game vance joseph probably had to contend with oh we can't stop the run yeah yeah which puts you in a bind and i think for buffalo what makes them good is i alluded to them not having a number one they really do and that's why people were doubting josh's beginning season he's got a lot of good options

whether it's tight end, whether it's Shakir, whether it's Coleman, and they're all different. And now you got Cooper. And another thing is the backs out of the backfield. The backs out of the backfield can be a problem in this game. So I would look for that. Yeah. Shout out Aaron Cromer punched a kid. Yeah. It's interesting. He doesn't like have a true number one, but I look at it like he just doesn't have a receiver where everybody is.

is asking why isn't this guy getting enough targets. Right. Which is nice. It's good. He's got really good options. Coleman's been pretty good as a rookie. And Shakir, the more I watch Shakir, I'm like, yeah, this guy is a legitimate star. He's awesome. He's awesome. He is awesome. And, you know, when you look at the Ravens,

But Hamilton is the guy you got to know where he is. And it's easier now with them moving him to safety primarily. You know where he's going to be. I think this is a game where you could get after Brandon Stevens. Yeah. Not to call somebody out, but like if you're playing the Ravens, you take your chances outside. Whereas last week,

with the corners they have, they were like, hey, it's going to be run game or we're worth the middle of the field. And that's what Josh did. This week is about outside the numbers. Yeah, so if you're looking at all the coaches still remaining and we're just talking about like during the game, X's and O's during the game and being a tactician in between the white lines, who is the best coach that's remaining?

Well, I got to give my respect to Andy Reid, number one, right? And part of that is the extension of who you have as your coordinator. He's got Steve Spagnuolo, who is a total stud and, you know, has turned down opportunities to go back and interview as a head coach before. So I put Andy Reid, number one. And then number two, I think Sean McVay is a wizard.

I really do. I think Sean McVay is one of the best coaches of our generation. I think he's that good. And I got to put Dan up there because of his coordinators and his cutting edge kind of decision making in game. Dan Quinn, yeah, I agree. You know, and then I'm not going to ignore my boy Sirianni. You know, I know that there's a hook here and I got the Eagles hat on, but you're asking about tacticians and he doesn't call plays.

But I just want to point this out. Like, you know, the record is the record. And I think anytime you listen to players talking about his way of communicating, motivating, having a team ready to play, he's had some bumps in the road, but he's also like our age, dude, like not, not say McVay's not young, but like, I think he can grow and he's grown even in this year alone, I think in hiring Vic Fangio,

was fantastic. I mean, Vic has been like, you know, if you had to take a head coaching job tomorrow like one of us did, we would probably hire a former head coach to be on the staff somewhere, right? And I think Vic adds a lot in this game and on defense side of the ball. So I just think it's Reed, McVay, in that order. And then you've got a lot of guys that don't call plays. Harbaugh doesn't call plays.

Sirianni doesn't call plays. Dan Quinn's a defensive guy. It's fun to see that defensive guys are back in in the NFL and culture guys too, and they're showing up this deep in the season. Yeah, yeah. It is. I had a question about coaching because we have the coaching, hiring, and firing going on right now.

When you went through a few different coaches with the Rams, what is it like when you're sitting there waiting for the new coach? And what are you hoping for? And what happens when that new coach gets hired and how quickly they can maybe change the culture or maybe they don't?

Well, there's two things. Number one, you want, and this isn't the most important thing. Number one thing is winning, right? But number two thing is like, what kind of scheme do they run? You know, who's going to be the coordinator? How am I getting along with my new D line coach? What is the scheme going to be prohibitive of me? Like taking that jump? Like when I was a young player,

And watching Spags getting hired, I was really excited. But we weren't good enough to turn that thing around. And the thing I didn't think about was like, what kind of defense does he run? Like, that's what I should have been thinking about.

And that was different. Like I had to play in a six technique and, you know, like the defense is a little bit different than what I played in the year before. And then when fish came, you know, I'm like, okay, I'm back in a wide nine. This is a lot of fun. You start calling players that played for him, you know, or played for him. You know, if you got somebody in a Rolodex, you hit them up. But it's usually like,

it's like opening a Christmas present, but you have to do it like every week if you're a St. Louis Ram, you know, like it feels like it happens way too much. But, um, by Jeff Fisher, I was like, Hey, whatever happens happens. And he ended up being like my favorite coach, um, that I had in St. Louis. So, um, you know, yeah, I think I had a total of like five or six head coaches. Um, if you include like interims and guys that came and went in St. Louis, but, um,

You know, it keeps you hungry if you're on a bad team and the coaches change all the time because you've got to prove it to the next group. Yeah, yeah, sure. It makes it harder, but it also keeps you hungry. And I feel like we're right at that time in the cycle where Spags is starting to go to – he's going to get some interviews. People are going to be interested in having Spags as a head coach. At some point, I feel like the thing I mentioned, culture guys, defense, I mean, that's kind of back in vogue. And I think at some point, like, things can get stale. It hasn't with him.

I think maybe the day Chris Jones moves on, I would consider it. Yeah. But,

But I think the interesting job right now that we're talking about is Vegas. I texted Dan the other day. It's kind of wild card, but it's starting to shape up a little bit. The fact that y'all – would y'all send a private plane down to pick him up to come interview in Chicago? Yeah. You know, I don't think it would be the worst hire in the world. Like I think court of public opinion has eventually come around on McCarthy. There's some guys that are never going to like him, but the players like him. And at the very least, I think they have a high floor with him. Yeah.

But what that tells me is that Ben Johnson might not be the guy, and it makes sense because of the GM alignment. Yeah. You know, if you guys have a GM in place, like Ben has made it. And Ben's done a really good job. Sometimes you can make yourself really valuable not just by your play calling, but turning down the job last year. It adds a little bit of mystique, right? Like you're like –

I don't put out. Yeah, right, right. Everyone wants you a little more. But you're exactly right. Like, this is going to be a very interesting test case because if he takes the Raiders job seemingly without a quarterback, turns down the Jaguars and the Bears –

He's basically saying, like, you guys should have fired your GM. I love Tom Brady. Yeah, and you should have fired your GM. You should have given me a shot to bring in my own GM. Like, that was stupid of you. And hopefully you're not kicking yourself because, you know, if he's, like, as good as people say he's going to be, like, then maybe you are. But I think what's interesting about the Vegas job is, like, Mark Davis is not, like, known to be a cash-fluid guy. Yeah. And I hate to talk about me and PFT. He's a good buddy. Yeah, good friend. And we met at the Wynn. Yep.

uh, by the Koi pond. I was so high on mushrooms. I was, I was, Hey, we had just come from, I don't know where we had come from, but, um, I was like, there he is. Let's talk to him. Uh, but, but there is a rumor that he's floated like a really big number. And, uh, if he did that, what a burn the ships like move that would be, especially considering all the coaches that he's had to buy out. And, um, you know, I think the Tom Brady effect is real, uh,

for Ben Johnson, he must really think like this is a valuable thing and he must have been given some assurances along with the fact they fired Tom Telesco, the GM, last week. You know, I think that bodes well for Vegas. But, you know, the most interesting thing is this weekend Tom's going to be calling that game. And it's going to be so funny to hear him try not to talk bad or, you know, like just listen for the dynamic there.

as the game goes on. Yeah, it's interesting. Big Cat's never said a bad thing about Mike McCarthy before. No, never. So I think he's totally cool with it. You'll be fine. He'll be good. How do we feel about – remember we talked midway through the season and you were getting excited off the Jacksonville game. Yeah. And I tried to bring you back down to earth. Yeah, you did. But I think he's going to be okay, man. I like the kid. The way I'd say it is like you can't script a worse –

Yeah.

Hopefully the Amarant gets figured out. Dude, I was impressed with him this year as bad as things were and as bad as he played at times. I was impressed with his mentality. I was impressed with his toughness. I was impressed with his...

just his like leadership. It looked like for a young player, like just the fire in his belly, like when things were going wrong to, to give a shit. Yeah. Like winning that game at the end of the season, like means nothing, but that meant a lot to him. Right. Absolutely. So, you know, I, I look forward to seeing him with somebody competent and you know, we got to work on like maybe not answering every phone call. Yup. Yup. That was unfortunate. That was very unfortunate. I also think he played that off pretty well. Yeah, exactly.

That was a good response to it. Rolled with the punches. I've been telling Big Cat that Mike McCarthy, I want to see it just because it's very funny considering everything Big Cat said in the past about Mike McCarthy. To have him now be the head coach. That's an interesting dynamic. When you get him on, I'm going to read them all. I'm going to read all the tweets. I'll read all the tweets. The more I think about it, it is a safe choice.

And when you look at his history, he's probably going to make you a pretty good team. But Caleb, in my opinion, physically has the tools to be special. Like an incredible quarterback. Mike McCarthy, if you're looking at him as like a high floor play...

I don't know. I think you can do better. I think that if you really want to maximize what could be a great quarterback, like one of the best, if not the best in the history of your franchise, you kind of should take a shot at that. Ben Johnson. Who would be the high floor play? Not to put you all on the spot.

I know Ben Johnson, but how do we know? I think McCarthy is going to be good. I don't know if he's going to be great. Ben Johnson's a swing for the fences. It could obviously fail. But there's also like, hey, we have to build that offensive line that your two all-world running backs have been running behind. And Jared Goff's actually pretty fucking good. Yeah, no, he is. And you're right. You don't get Ben Johnson's offensive line when you get Ben Johnson. That's a pretty big deal. Yeah, can he bring the guys with him? Right, that's a

pretty big deal. What about like Sark? What about like some wild card? Todd Munkin. I like Todd Munkin. I don't know. I mean, there's some names out there. It's going to end up being McCarthy. Dabo Sway. Oh my God. I mean, they interviewed Matt Campbell.

All right. I got one last question for you, Chris. This has been awesome. Everyone, like I said, go listen to Chris's podcast, Greenlight Podcast. They do a great job. Roback.com, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, promo code TAKE, 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. They got new hoodies that are super comfortable. Roback.com. What a great company. Not to step on the ad read. Yeah, great company. All right. Putting you on the spot. Favorite bet of the weekend.

Ooh, favorite bet of the weekend. Geez. Yeah. Favorite bet of the weekend. Golly, I am on the spot. I'm going to bet it.

Please don't. Yeah, favorite bet of the weekend. I went like 55 and 31, picking five a week this week or this year or whatever it was, and I went one and four last week. Okay. Playoffs, different game. Can you read me the lines at this point? Yeah, the Chiefs are eight and a half point favorites. The Lions are nine and a half point favorites. The Bills are one and a half point underdogs, and the Eagles are six point favorites. Okay.

That's a lot of points in Philly. I know, but you want to do it. What's the first half Rams –

I mean, I'm not going to say it. I'm not going to say anything about Philly and the Rams. We can connect the dots based on what you've already said. You know I'm inevitably going to bet Buffalo. You're going to do it anyways. Why don't we just do it? Yeah, plus one and a half at home. Just do it. We're going to bet Buffalo. I am. I know that game's going to come around because I've said it. I have no idea who's going to win, but I know when the game is about to kick off, I'm like, yeah, fuck it. Let's go Buffalo. Or you could tease...

The Buffalo Bills with the Philadelphia Eagles. Yeah, I like that one too. And then close to the heart, you know, on both things. I like teasing them with the Chiefs because I feel like Chiefs, you tell me that they win by one point or one and a half points. That feels like a pretty good chance to take. Yeah.

It does feel good, but it would make it so not fun if you're trying to celebrate seeing an upset. That's the biggest enemy I have betting during the playoffs. I always love seeing the dog. Yeah, you don't want to be the guy who took the one seed against the 16th.

And then like a UMBC happens. I did that. Yes. And then you can't even, well, you fucking motherfucker. You want a title the next year? It doesn't matter. You bet against. Tony Bennett's gone, dude. I know, I know. You bet against UMBC? No. What's the big deal? I was at a wedding that weekend.

And it was in, it was like a Baltimore wedding and there were like 10 UMBC people at least. That's how, that's gotta be the most UMBC people in one room ever. In one room ever. And they just happened to be like at this fucking wedding and I'll never forget like waking up so hungover the next day and all the people that, that gave me the like, Hey, you know, tonight they fucking, they didn't even mean it. And they were right. Oh, that's brutal. I like CJ Stroud over 14 and a half rushing yards. I like that as well. Yeah. Yeah.

You know what? Hey, shameless plug. You can check it out on our show. I'll have my shit together by then with the gambling. Love it. Because it's too early in the week. Okay. So yeah, check it out. Sharps, we wait. Yeah. I've loved watching you on TV, Chris. You've been very good on TV. You've worked with Coach Belichick.

uh what's that been like behind the scenes dude he is the funniest motherfucker ever i mean he has the advantage of like surprise because you know you don't think of him that way and even having been coached by him i knew he was funny in his own dry kind of way but like the production meetings in the morning my face hurts from smiling yeah and it's also he's like

He's like a football dad. Like, you just want to follow him around and ask him questions. He's been fun, man. You know, and they took the UNC job the morning he took the UNC job. We were all like he walks in the production. We were like, coach. Oh, you know, I'm playing the UNC fight song. And he sits down. He's like, you believe everything you fucking hear in the media. And then four o'clock that day when we all leave, he takes the job. So good. So he signed the contract.

Has not. He's a steel trap, dude. Oh, what? Hasn't signed the contract. Technically signed the contract. Well, you know, he likes to make things interesting. Yeah, always. All right, well, Chris, you're the best. We'll see you in New Orleans, man. Thank you so much. Dude, can't wait. Let's get after it, man. Yes. Love a good time. Part of my take is sponsored by BetterHelp. Every year, January brings you 365 blank pages waiting to be filled. In 2025, maybe you're ready for a plot twist, or maybe there's a part of your story that you've been wanting to revise.

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And now, here's Adam Schefter. Okay, we now welcome on our very, very good friend, Adam Schefter. He's the ESPN Insider. Now, I just want everyone to know that this is not going to cover our yearly combine tradition where we'll just go backwards into the entire year of tweets and stories. This is solely because we need to know what the heck is going on with the NFL coaches themselves.

hiring, firing, where everyone's going. And I think we have to start in the most intriguing spot, and that's the Dallas Cowboys. And what – let me start with this. How close was Mike McCarthy to staying, and how did that all fall apart, like, you know, in the last couple of days?

Well, before we get to Mike McCarthy and falling apart, first I'll have to say that one of the coolest things of my career so far has been to watch my daughter on the Nickelodeon broadcast. Yes. Introduce you guys. Yes.

and make you a part of Bikini Bottom, right? That was pretty cool. It technically wasn't us. It was Big Catfish and P.F. Manatee. Yeah, she did a great job, though. I appreciate that she introduced us before she introduced LeBron James. Yeah. I thought that was the correct order.

I should have started with that. You're absolutely right. She did a fantastic job. We were the Leo meme. We were watching it because the main broadcast and one of the side TVs was Nickelodeon. And PFT and I both just looked up and were like, what the heck?

And she crushed it.

And so my son took her. And so I'm sitting there at home like a regular viewer watching her. And she pops on the screen. I think her first hit, her very first hit that day was you guys kind of showing you guys at the game. So I hope you guys enjoyed the Texas Tigers game at Bikini Bottom. And she did a great job. You must have been a very proud dad. Yes. Yes. Well, and the great part was sitting with my wife.

And I know that she's going to do the post-game interview. And I said, yeah, we'll see what it is. I don't think it'll be Joe Mixon because I just don't think they're going to do it. And they said, let's go down to the old chapter. We're standing by with Joe. I'm like, they did it. They did it. Joe Mixon uses the word ass in hell. Very funny. All right. So Cowboys, give it to us. What happened with Mike McCarthy? And then are they going to actually hire Dion? Yeah.

First of all, I know a lot of people felt like Mike was going to be back, including myself at one point. Like, okay...

The players are coming out and supporting him. Jerry's coming out and supporting him. He wants to be like, it was going that way, but it's one of those things where I guess it's like a couple dating. Well, yeah, they're going to get married. They're going to get married. They're going to, except the guy never gives up the ring. And after a while, at some point in time, the woman's like, you know what? Either you're going to give me the ring or I'm moving on. And I think they sat down and they went over football stuff all week long and it became apparent that,

That Jerry wasn't committing long-term. They never, ever got into negotiations. They're moving forward with insights and observations about the football team. Now, was there something that was said or done in those few days between the end of the season till the time where both sides said that they part or going their own ways? I don't think there was. I just think it became apparent over the course of those conversations that

The Cowboys weren't entering into negotiations. Like, okay, at what point do you realize, like, wow, he's eligible to talk to teams Tuesday at midnight, and there's been zero negotiating. Like, we're going to wait until midnight on Tuesday before you realize he's not going to be back as the Dallas Cowboys coach or what? Yeah. And I just think it went in that direction, and to the point where both sides knew that was the way it was going to go, and then they

memorialized it, made it official. Yeah. Because when they blocked him from doing other interviews, it felt like that's a move that you would make if you were progressing towards a new contract, right? Right. Yes, yes. But here's the thing. I think sometimes you're trying to explain actions that aren't so easily explained with certain people. And also, they knew that it wasn't like they were denying him the right to go take the bearer's job, right? Because...

in-person interviews can't even occur until after the divisional playoff round. The Bears have been all over the map. And if Mike McCarthy is going to talk to the Bears...

He's going to be able to do it next week, whether it is then or now. I almost feel like it's like, again, to use that dating analogy, you know, okay, the girl wants you to propose. You're not proposing. Well, can I go out with? No, you can't. But now a week later, you can. It applies there too. And so I just think that in the end, ultimately, that's what they decide to do. Each side went its own way. And when they said no...

You didn't know whether that meant that they were going to try to get something done or whether they were just kind of being Dallas. And that's what they were doing, being Dallas. So if you had to handicap three names that you could see going to Dallas, who is it? And we're all just intrigued about the Dion part. Of course. Everybody is, right? And I think that, again, we're going to hear other names come up.

But I think Kellen Moore is a logical name because he fits there, knows how it works, can do the job on Jerry's terms, wouldn't cost what it would cost to hire Mike Vrabel. It fits in so many ways. But then you also have the allure of a guy like Deion Sanders and he's

It's not like Jerry, I don't think, has to interview Dion. He knows Dion and Dion knows him, although you'd want to hear his ideas for the program and what he would be thinking going forward. And so, look, I think Jerry changes mind a couple of times on McCarthy going along this. And I think it's possible, probably likely, that

He, like other teams, you go through this process and you think, you know what? I think I kind of like this guy. And then you talk to this guy. Well, I like that guy. And then this guy makes up ground. So it's hard to forecast exactly how it's going to come out. I would just say like Helen Moore, square and contention. Deion Sanders, if that's the way Jerry wants to go, square and contention. Could we get a guy like...

Leslie Frazier or Jason Witten. Yes, it's possible. But I think that Kellen Moore is the logical name.

And Deion Sanders is the really fun, intriguing name. Yeah. They go. It's like the two, the two angel, the angel and the demon on Jerry Jones's shoulder. The splash hire is always going to be in Jerry's mind. He's like, you know, Deion instant excitement for the Dallas Cowboys. Good for the brand. Kellen Moore makes the most sense. Well, but no, but PFT, the splash hire may be the logical hire here. Yeah. The logical hire here. We, you know, we just, I Deion Sanders,

has got something of the Midas touch. He's, he's incredible around people. I, you know, I think he'd be great. I really do. I, and in fact, again, I said this on get up this morning, but I go back to this call that I got in October of 2023. GM calls me up and he's like, Hey, write this down. The next head coach of the Dallas Cowboys is going to be Deion Sanders. I'm like, he's like, take it to the bank. I'm like, okay, why do you say Jerry loves him? He loves Jerry. It's going to happen. Um,

Will it happen? We're all waiting to see. It'd be unbelievable for everybody. Be great for the Cowboys, be great for Dion, be great for shows like yours and this. Yeah, big time. Do you think that Dion would want his son to play for the Cowboys if he was going to be the head coach? I don't view that as a viable option right now. That doesn't mean that at a later date that that couldn't happen, but...

First of all, Dak Prescott's got a no-trade clause in his contract. He's the highest paid player in football. They just paid him. It's not practical to move off Dak, and I don't think they're thinking of moving. They want Dak to be there. And by the way, are the Titans, who have the number one pick, where you potentially would have to be to take Shador, are they going to go trade that pick for Dak, the highest...

I don't know about that. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it just, it's to me, that's more fantasy football. I know, I know Deanna's talked about the fact that he'd want to be with his son. Well, okay. But that would be ideal, but it's not practical right now, unless the Titans wanted to do something. Um,

So I think it's more along the lines of he's got great respect and affection for Jerry Jones. And it's the Dallas Cowboys. And I don't know if he still has his house. I still think he does. He's had a house in that area. Yep. Yeah. It was the franchise. Like, I mean, it's a no brainer. So that that's one that I think could get him to.

change his mind. Okay. So other, other spots, are the bears going to lose out on Ben Johnson? It feels like there was a lot of momentum of Ben Johnson in Chicago and now all the momentum has switched and it's Raiders for Ben Johnson and Mike McCarthy for the bears. Is that fair? Where, where, where is it? Where's it at? I would just say this, that there's a lot of Ben Johnson Raiders talk, right? A lot of conversation about that. Right. And that may happen. Like it could,

But I don't think the Jaguars should be dismissed. And I don't think the Chicago Bears should be dismissed. Okay. I really believe that all of them have something of an equal opportunity. I don't believe there's one ahead of the other. And I think there are three potential options. And we're going to see how that goes. Yeah. And what...

What is it with Ben Johnson? Is it, is it, uh, he wants the most money. Is it, you know, obviously the two, the two out of the three of those have quarterbacks that you would think, you know, Caleb Williams and Trevor Lawrence. The third has Tom Brady as part of partial owner. What do you think he prioritizes?

I think when you're going through one of these job searches, it becomes obvious to you and apparent to you over time who wants you most. And I don't mean in the form of money. You guys have been through this yourselves in your life. Just think back to people who have wanted you and how that became evident to you. And I think that Ben Johnson is going to be in a situation here where I believe he's going to be open to any one of these situations. And the landing spot will make...

itself apparent and evident to him over time through the conversations that either he or his agent have with that particular team. There are drawbacks, questions with each one of those openings. He's going to have to get sufficient answers before he proceeds forward. There's not going to be a perfect spot, but there's going to be a good spot in the end. And it's up to him to pick really the best team

of the that are out there that are after him. And, and I think, I really believe right now he doesn't know what that will be. Yeah. But again, it will over time materialize and become clear. You know what? Boy, this, this team, this team is doing what I want in the front office. This team is handling this the way they're going to structure this the way they're saying they're going to, this team's giving me more years. This team's giving me more money. This team is saying, come do that. Like,

These things become apparent to you over time. And I believe the same will be true here of Ben Johnson. And I don't believe there is a favor right now. I really don't. Okay. Okay. I like that. What kind of questions, maybe not in the sense of the Ben Johnson interviews, but if it's a coach that is not seen as, you know, someone who gets to pick their destination, what kind of questions are asked to a coach, prospective coach during an interview for the head job?

You know, I've never been a part of the process, so I don't exactly know, but I know that a lot of that time is spent going over staffing and their visions for the team. And if you're a team like the Jets, I'm sure they're asking, okay, if you come in as the head coach, the GM, what are we doing? A quarterback, like they want to know their plans. And by the way, the Jets have asked for permission from basically every candidate out there, except for Robert Sala, which at this point in time, I wouldn't be surprised if they turn in commission for him at this point, but

I'd want to know the ideas of everybody. Like, what do you do? What do you think that we should do a quarterback? Yeah. Because somebody may have an idea that you hadn't thought of that can help you at that spot. So I, I've never been a, I would love to be a fly on the wall in one of these head coaching processes. It would be fascinating to see. And again, just like, just like we're talking about the team over time, uh,

distinguishing itself and becoming obvious to a guy like Ben Johnson, I believe the same is true in turn where a candidate is

distinguishes himself over time and makes it such that that team believes that that guy is the right guy to go get. Yeah. Yeah. We'll get back to Adam Schefter in a second. He's brought to you by Kevin's natural foods. I've got their general sauce chicken right here. One of my favorite meals in the entire world. I love general sauce chicken and Kevin's natural foods makes an awesome general sauce chicken.

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And it's healthy. All right. Now here's more Adam Schefter. We saw Rex Ryan, your colleague, has distinguished himself a lot on the airwaves. Is that going to happen or is that ship sailed? Well, I don't think the ship has sailed. Listen, Rex is so passionate and so confident.

and he's so unique and you know I love working with the guy so much I'd love to see him give the check I I told the story to somebody I'm like I'm sitting at the kitchen table and the local news comes out and they say and Rex Ryan's interviewing for the Jets today and you

My wife and daughter, they don't know anything about football. Rex, didn't he coach there 10 years ago? I'm like, yeah. They're like, didn't they fire him? Yeah. Well, why are they talking to him now? I said, well, they haven't been back to an AFC championship game since they fired him. Yeah. Right? So Rex knows what's worked in New York, what succeeded. I would never underestimate Rex. I'm personally rooting for the guy. But let's see how the process plays itself. I think a guy like Aaron Glenn is...

a favorite in New York. And I believe Aaron Glenn is absolutely going to get one of these head coaching jobs, whether it's in New York or New Orleans. So if it happens to be in New York, well, that knocks Rex out of the Jets and he doesn't get the job then. If it doesn't happen with Aaron Glenn, does Rex come into play? He's got

A lot of friends, a lot of relationships there. And I'd love to see it, although I'd hate to lose him from ESPN because he's so great to work with. But we'll see how it all plays out. I want to go back to the Cowboys real quick. Is there anything to do with Belichick still possibly looking at the Cowboys? I know people keep bringing this up. I know it is lingering out there. I just don't see it. I just don't see it. I mean, I'm going to take Bill at his word.

He said we didn't come to North Carolina to leave North Carolina. We came here to be here. He said all kinds of things along those lines. He's in high schools every single day. I don't care that his contract isn't formally signed. I don't care that he's connected to the... Here's my question, a better one. Let's do it in basic common sense. Give me a place right now where you believe...

He fits naturally as a head coach. Go through the openings, and I could blow up every one of those places for a different reason. Like, there's not even a logical fit for him out there right now. Possibly the Raiders with Tom Brady? No. Don't see it. The Cowboys is the only one that comes to mind for me. By the way, I understand why people would say that. I don't see it. I think Bill obviously had to be aware that that job could open. Like,

He's not an idiot. Everybody knew that McCarthy was in the last year. I'm sure that a close look was taken at that situation. For whatever reason, he took the North Carolina job. I just don't see a fit for him with these current openings anywhere for me.

That's one of the things that I was looking at when the story came out. I think it was Jonathan Jones reported that he has not signed his contract officially at UNC yet. I don't know how common that is. I don't know if it's one of these things where coaches frequently get to work before signing on the dotted line. I know he signed a term sheet, which is different, and it's not legally binding to him. But, I mean, Bill has signed –

a napkin before and said, this is legally binding. The way it's been explained to me is they have an offer sheet agreement, which is common as the state of North Carolina works out the details. It's a process there to get a deal finalized. There isn't a gray area, but they have an offer sheet agreement, which is common in that state right now. Got it. Got it. So who would be a good fit for the Raiders? Well, Ben Johnson, I believe they're definitely interested in, you know, whether or not the

C, that remains very much in question. And then if they don't get Ben Johnson, what do they then do? That's where I think it gets really interesting. Who is their next choice?

I don't have an answer for you right now. Like, again, they haven't met face-to-face with a lot of these candidates. We could just throw people up at certain spots and talk about it, but I don't know how much that makes sense right now. It feels like there's maybe too many teams, and I count myself as part of this, who are just banking on, like, well, we'll get Ben Johnson. Well, let me say this. I believe that Ben Johnson is the big domino here. Yeah. And so...

I think the Raiders are waiting to see what happens with Ben Johnson. I think the Bears are waiting to see what happens. I think the Jaguars are waiting to see. So right then and there, the process has slowed down. Then we have the NFL and its clunky process slowing it down even more to where no face-to-face interviews are even allowed with coaches under contracts to teams until after this upcoming weekend division. So that slows it down.

Again, it's great to talk about and wonder about and speculate, but this is still really early in the process. And there's a lot that's going to play out and a lot that's still going to change. Let me ask you this. Is there a possibility that Ben Johnson does what he did last season and just says, I want to be a line? I don't see it this year. I don't see it. Ben Johnson has turned down two years of opportunities and

I don't care who you are in this league. At some point, you have to take the plunge. The money is too great. The opportunities are too great. You can't keep turning down jobs year after year. And again, the Lions might be this good again next year. They might be, but this is the NFL. They might not.

And if they're not and he doesn't take one, well, all of a sudden you're on your coordinator salary as opposed to a head coaching salary of anywhere between, I don't know, 10, 11, $12 million a year.

Like there's just too much money to turn it down again. I don't believe it's going to happen. I believe he's taking a head coaching job this year. You think maybe, maybe Glenn and Ben Johnson, a little bit too focused on doing outside interviews, maybe taking their eye off the ball this weekend. That's why you have agents though. That's why you have agents to go over that and gather all the information and

find out the answers to the questions while you're coaching the game. Like that's an agent's job. And he presents everything to you boiled down so that you can then sit down with your wife and figure out what's best before you're going into it. He, he has an idea of all that. Like we're not oblivious to this. He knows what each organization is about. And by the way, yes, he's getting ready to coach in an incredibly important post season where the lions can make history and have an unbelievable, memorable run for that city. But, but,

He's a human being. He also is aware that there is a career-altering option in front of him. So, of course, there's going to be some thought given to that. Is the NFL going to do anything about...

Tom Brady being an owner of the Raiders and calling that game this weekend and then being able to interview Ben Johnson before? Here's what I say to that, honestly. Tom Brady has spoken to Ben Johnson. He'll go through this in the interview. Do you think he's going to sit down there this weekend while Ben's getting ready for the biggest game of the season and be like, if you come to Vegas, here's what we're going to do. What do you think?

Tom Brady is a professional. Ben Johnson is a professional. They're not doing that this weekend. I know there are sensitive people, but I think you have to be practical about it. What are we talking about? Yeah, and it also feels like, I assume, I've never been in one of those big production meetings, but aren't there like 10 people in there? Correct. It would be a little weird if people

It'll be Tom Brady. It'll be Kevin Burkhart. It'll be all the producers, the directors, Aaron Andrews, Tom Rauch. Like, they're all around there. So if he does it, we'll find out. There will be a leak. No.

If he actually does that. They wanted me for a glass of wine later. Do you really think they need to do that? What are they going to go over there that they haven't before or couldn't in the future? What do they have to do with that moment that has to get done the night before the commanders play the Lions? Come on. Maybe Tom just flashes him that winning smile and charms him with his eyes. I was getting nervous about it. That could be. Yeah. Because I think the Bears are going to end up losing out on Ben Johnson and get Mike McCarthy, which...

It'll be fine. I'll just say this, Big Cat. I don't know how it's going to go yet, but here's what I would say. He may not be a bear. Absolutely. That's possible. But I would just say right now, at this stage of the process, right now,

Don't lose the faith. Okay. I like that. All right. So, Chef D, I got one last question for you. This has been awesome. Again, we'll do our full sit-down in Indy, which we always love. Did anything happen this year that there is to go over? I don't know. We'll find some stuff. We got some stuff, some beefs. Roback question, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, promo code TAKE. 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, roback.com, promo code TAKE.

Please tell me that the NFL is not going to change how the seeding works because one season the Vikings won 14 games and had to play on the road. It's never happened before. I don't see them changing it any time in the future. The league is always looking at ways to innovate and improve. But I've heard this complaint. Remember the year where the—

Seahawks won the division with a horrible record. It was like 500. And then the Saints had a much better record and had to go to Seattle for the opening wildcard game. And that turned out to be the Beastquake game where Marshawn Lynch had one of the most memorable runs in NFL history. And the sound level in that stadium matched a new world record. The league is intent upon winning.

division winners. I don't see that changing anytime soon. Okay, good, good, good. Division should matter. Yes. Now, now, now, could the league, nobody said this, but we're just talking out loud logically. Could they then say, okay, we're going to have the division winners host games. And then after that we'll recede. I, I,

I don't know. Does that even make sense? I maybe, I don't know, but I've never heard any momentum or movement to change the way the playoff seating system works. Perfect. That's what I wanted to hear. I appreciate that response. Yep.

That's the correct response. All right, well, Shefty, you're the best. Maybe we'll see you in New Orleans, but we'll also see you in Indy. Hold on. How nervous is PFT about Saturday night? I'm nervous. I think the Lions have a great team, but they don't have Jaden Daniels.

They don't. Period. That's how I feel about it. If we can keep it within, if it's a one-score game in the fourth quarter, I think that Jaden Daniels will go out there and do something special and win the game. That's where he's most dangerous, right? Six comebacks in the final 10 seconds of games this year. No rookie quarterback ever has done that. He's become like a modern-day Joe Montana, John Elway, with the ability to improvise and run around. The guy's been incredible, and

One person there said he covers up for a lot of our sins. Yes, yes, he certainly does. On that note, Cliff Kingsbury, is he going to get a job offer, do you think? And would he accept a head coaching position? Because he said when he left the Cardinals, maybe it's a good thing that I'm not a head coach. That's a lot of stress that he dealt with. Do you think he's going to get an offer, and would he accept? Let me start by saying this. If I'm Cliff Kingsbury...

And I'm happy. I'm in no rush to leave Jaden Daniels. I know I've got arguably the best young player in football on my roster. And so if something materialized and it was ideal and it was great, sure. I don't know that he's looking to rush back into that world. Right. I think he's still being paid by Arizona. He doesn't have to. It's not going to impact his bottom line any.

There's a lot of stress on that. I don't know that he's going to get one. I don't know that he really wants one. I don't know that he cares about one. I think he cares about playing the Lions right now. And we'll see how that process plays itself out. Like I said, to me, Ben Johnson, Aaron Glenn, getting two of the six openings. Now we're down to four openings. You can go try to figure out

Who those other four guys are going to be that are going to fill up those head coaching jobs. One of them is Dallas wild card. We'll see how Jerry Jones thinks now we're down to three. So we got Brian Flores. We got Joe Brady. We got Liam Cohn. We got,

Todd Monk. Yeah. There are a lot of guys. And again, these guys are under contract. They haven't even met with these teams yet in person. Right. It's hard to say how that's going to go. Yeah. All right. Well, Shefty, you're the best. We'll see you soon. We really appreciate it. And tell your daughter congrats on a great broadcast and thank you for giving us the respect we deserve.

going in front of lebron james in fish form yes yes that had that had to be a career highlight like i've never been called out on a on a bikini bottom slime slime it was it was great yeah that's big time that that that i know you guys have done a lot but that's when you know you're really yes absolutely all right thanks so much chef d thanks guys see you soon thank you good to see you okay let's wrap up we got fire fest of the week henry yeah give it to us yeah uh

Good friend, longtime colleague, coworker, collaborator, brother, PFT commenter who's in the room with us right now. He's trying to spin a false narrative against me and you kind of, Big Cat, that we don't like V. That you don't exist? Oh, yeah. I love V. I love V. Love V. Love V. He removed the context from the conversation. He did.

He basically just going around saying these guys are gay. No, I didn't. Yeah, it's a witch hunt. I didn't say that at all because in the moment... He's leading a gay witch hunt against them. This is interesting because in the moment, I felt like an outsider because I was the only one putting my hand up and saying...

And I love V. We were talking visually. Yeah, just as itself. I think I was on your side, PFT. Oh, thank you, Max. I think I was talking about how I like full V pictures. Yeah, listen, hand up. I'm sorry. I like vaginas. I'm willing to die on that hill. Me too. I'm willing to die on that hill. Now I have to say, I have to clarify, knowing that you and you got memes in your pocket with the clip army, and it's like, I got to say, I also love vaginas. I do too. Okay, great. But I also love T and A.

But yeah, if we're talking about strictly pictures, which we were like visually. Yes. Yeah. Like the question is, is, is tits or ass and you would say V that's what you're answering. You would rather have a picture of V than T. I love look. Yeah. They look great. Oh, I'd rather see a picture. What would your answer be? T or a, you'd say V. Uh,

No, if you ask me T-R-A, that's a two-part question. It's A or B. How about this, for example? I would say T. The nice young lady at the Oilers game, you would have preferred her to flash her V. No, because that's different. No. That's way different. No. It is way different. Flashing V in a public setting, that's a little low class even for me. But the T was great.

I love the tea. Yeah. And there's a bunch of people that are using the Superbad argument of like, oh, yeah, I'm going to say what Jonah Hill said. Jonah Hill's character in Superbad also had an obsession with drawing dicks everywhere. He loved dicks. I don't even remember Superbad. Where he was like, you ever seen a V on its own? Not for me.

Ah, got it. Listen, Hank, I believe that you like V. I'm not saying that you're gay. I'm saying that I felt like you were saying I was gay for liking vaginas. Well, you made the wings analogy, which you said that A is celery, which if you're looking at the wings, the sauce, celery, you're ranking A last. What do you mean?

Like, if you're talking about a plate of wings, you're power raking a wing of plates. It's the wings. It's the sauce. It's the celery. It's the last. It might have been a clumsy analogy. Maybe the V, ribeye steak. A, mac and cheese. The T, maybe mashed potatoes. But we're talking just visually. Loaded baked potato. Twice baked potato is what it is. That's what the T's are. I don't know. I just didn't appreciate it. I've had people coming up, talk to me, and be like, do you don't like V, dude? I'm like, no.

This is all PFT spin doctor. No, I'm just saying in the moment I felt like I was a weirdo because I was the only one that said, hey, I love V. So do I, for the record. Me too. Now you've put me in a spot. Yeah. Okay. Well, yeah. We all have our preferences. I'm just a V guy. I like brains. A woman's brains. I like her soul. Yeah. I agree. I like kind souls. So wait. I'm not talking about feet. Just to put a bow on it. Gay? Gay?

No. Oh. V. Okay. V. I'm pro V1. Pro V1. Pro V1. That's what they call you. D? D? You like D? Cups? No. No. Oh. Not even your own? Sure. Okay. All right. So your fire fest is that everyone thinks that you're gay. My fire fest is today in our office, which is a...

against, I don't even know what's the word, inappropriate. I had to defend my stance on liking V's around a bunch of coworkers. Who was attacking you? A lot of people. Were there women? Women. Women? Maybe Rick. Everyone was getting lunch and I was just trying to make my lunch just being like, nope, I love V. So Rick got this rattled?

I think it was the internet. I think the internet. It was PFT's tweet being like, I don't like V, Henry Lockwood. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's back up because memes posted the clip and then I... But you took it out of context. No, I posted it and I said, fellas, is it gay to like vaginas? And then Hank was like, that's not what I said. Then I directly quoted you. Right, but we were talking about pictures. What was your quote? I don't know. You said it. No, it was your quote.

I don't know that I get turned on by straight V. Visually. Okay. A picture of it. Yes. I do. We all have differences. Yeah, I don't think a picture of it does. I'd rather see a picture of tits. Pictures. We're talking strictly pictures. That's exactly. That's where the context you were selectively choosing context. I was just quoting you. I'm sorry. I go TAV for pictures. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah.

Okay, PFT. Good Firefest, eh? Great Firefest. I'm glad we cleared that all up. My week's been pretty good overall. I would say that my Firefest is mostly something that I realized last week watching football. And really, as the college football playoff began, I started to realize this.

that there are only like five commercials in the world. Only five commercials exist and I'm sick of all five of them and I've seen all of them and the commercials, you basically have your pick of like the State Farm Cinematic Universe which includes like Derrick Henry, Moe,

Mahomes, all that stuff. You've got some, usually a product with Shaq in it. Yep. Is one of the options that you have. Then you've got Flow and just like a lot of insurance out there. There's only like five commercials anymore. We used to have lots of commercials.

Yeah, and you get- Now they're all gone. And you get caught in these times where you're like, you know, we watch a lot of sports, but like when you're really, like March Madness, when you're really watching sports wall to wall, and it's like, shit. Yeah. That's it? And that's all you get, and you see them over and over and over. I feel like it's gotten more limited in scope, too. Shout out YouTube's TV, by the way. The Zen is the best.

And I don't, I don't actually like cools my brain down. It's really good. And I don't want to sound like I'm talking shit about the NFL or their corporate partners or their messaging. I respect the NFL's ability to make, I would never, I used to be racist as fuck until the NFL painted in racism in the end zone. Yep. And so I pay attention when Roger Goodell speaks. Yeah. And I just want to say constructive feedback, Roger Goodell, give us different commercials. The shit sucks.

I'd agree. I'd agree. All right. My fire fest is I'm solo dadding this weekend, so I'm probably going to miss the Commander's Lion stream. Apologies, PFT. It's okay. I'm going to try to be in for the Texans Chiefs where I have a little help, but the menu is going to get tight. We're going to do a tight menu. Chicken nuggets and mac and cheese, and that's it. And that is it. Annie's?

Yeah, oh yeah. Oh yeah. Gotta hit Annie's. Elite. But yeah. What kind of silverware and cutlery and plate situation are we working with? The two older ones use regular plates and silverware. The youngest still uses his hands mostly and plastic plate. He likes to throw shit everywhere. I would just lay down a tarp.

Yeah, just garbage bags. I should put a trough out. Are you hoping for bedtime by the Commanders game, or are you hoping halftime? I'm going to probably be watching the first half of the Commanders-Lions game, no sound, while we watch Minions on the top TV. So yeah, that will be my reality. Just being honest. But it's only that one game I'll be in on Sunday, all day Sunday. But yeah, I got to...

Just power through it. But yeah, that's why. So if you tune on the stream on Sunday night and I'm not there, or I might not even be here for the Saturday afternoon one. I'm going to try to make it in. That's why. So yeah, wish me luck. I got this. Good luck. I got this. Good luck. We're going to have the Beave is going to be on from Heart of Factor. Love that. Kate's Mr. Beave is going to be there giving me moral support as a fellow Commanders fan. Yeah. Love that. Also, Reverse Firefest. I just love everyone in this room and all of our listeners so goddamn much. That's really just...

Been a tough couple weeks, but it's great. I got a little teary-eyed actually last night driving home because I was just like,

It was a nice perspective of being like, damn, you know, the internet's a scary place, tough place, but there's a lot of people who care a lot about us. And it's good to have that moment. And then everyone in this room I'd fucking die for it, take a bullet for. Yeah, we love it too. I know it's been a tough few months for you. Yeah, it's been a few months. I didn't realize that you lost how much? Like 15 pounds. I've just not been eating. Yeah. And it's not like a...

It's not even conscious. It's like lunch happens and I just walk right by it. I'm like, I have no appetite and stress. But

We're powering through. I didn't even tell you. This is just a funny... If we're doing a reverse Fyre Fest, it's just an anecdote that's made me laugh since it happened. But I went out to dinner with Stu on Wednesday or Tuesday. Just me and him. And a few months ago, I was talking about quitting smoking. I have quitting smoking. And he also used to be the biggest pothead of all time. He has also quit. So we were talking about that and talking about how weird dreams and shit...

And I was like, you know, do you think you'll ever like start again? He's like, no, I can't. Like the, his diabetes or whatever it is. He's like, I just can't smoke. Like I can't eat carbs after he had just eaten. Like,

two appetizers, like a massive pasta meal, and then ate like half of my chicken parm. He's like, yeah, you know, I just can't eat the carbs. And I was like, Stu, you just fucking wolfed down an Italian dinner for three. It's like, yeah, you know, I just can't smoke and I can't do carbs. Wait, wait, wait, what? It's like, remember the mincey picture of him at the barbecue joint? He's like, no sugar. Yeah.

All the barbecue sauce. All the barbecue, yeah. Wait, Max, you didn't do your fire fest about the bachelor parties. You didn't say it. I didn't say anything. Go ahead. Bachelor parties. A lot of bachelor parties. Yeah. That's basically it. And I also can't... I'm not picking the bachelor party. We are. Or bachelor party. Correct. So that's why everyone... The amount of texts that I've gotten from people that I've met like one time six years ago being like...

You have to come to my batch. It's never been more of a thing in my entire life, and I can't keep track of it all. I guess if you guys want to do that one, we can do that. I like giving you the illusion of having a choice, but ultimately we're going to be the ones that decide. But that's why I think I'm putting out a Google form so that it's just organized in one place. Who's going over the Google form? Not me. Not me? I will. Oh.

I don't want Hank doing either. I will. I trust BFT. Are you going to go over the Google form in Vanny Woodhead when he's driving down the street? Vanny Woodhead's buzzing. Okay. Okay, yeah. Shout out to Mike. I'll do that. I'll be in charge. I'll be in charge of the Google Doc, and as my first act of being in charge, I'd like to delegate that task to Hank. I'm done. Actually, you know what? Hank, I need you to report to me, though, and then I'll report to Max. You know what we should do is, because, you know, we have a lot of work. I think we should delegate the Google Doc to one Stephen Cheh.

No. He's a Google Doc master. No, but he'll give Max... He'll be like, oh, go to Chicago. No, but he'll get us down to 100.

True. I honestly haven't seen that many people send us DMs. I haven't either. I'm surprised with the lack of AWLs getting married. Yeah, here and there I get a couple. Most people are just sending them to me, and I just have to say I can't. So keep sending them to you? What, have you gotten like 10? Yeah, that's our way of saying that. Five? We would like to see a lot more. What's going on? You got five bachelor party requests? I've gotten like 5,000. Yeah, I've gotten a shitload of them.

I have two. All right. Good show, boys. Football this weekend. Can't wait. Only what? How many games left? It's the Final Four this weekend. Seven. Seven. Eight. Counting the National Championship. Eight games of football left. Enjoy the fuck out of every second. Okay. Numbers. Five. Three. Eleven. Seventeen. AJ Brown's going to have a game of eleven. Hype video coming out Friday. One hundred. It's already started. Ninety-nine. Nine.

54. 29. 98. Oh, right on it. Fuck. Love you guys. Also, Shane wants a nickname.

Leader in the clubhouse is Graphics Guy. Yeah, Shane has requested a nickname. Shane wants a nickname? Yeah, he said, I'd like a nickname. I've never had a nickname before. So memes posted a picture of him. I think a pretty up-to-date photo. Like yesterday? I have one for you. Tom Fernelli had a great suggestion, which was Graphics Guy. That's good. And that is so far the leading vocator. I suggested Zane. Shane, I have one for you, but we've discussed it. I don't think it would be... Poppy? No. No.

Let's hear it. You know which one I'm going to say. I can't say it. Oh, don't. Yeah. Why not? Graphics guy. A lot of votes. GG. Love you guys.