Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's Pardon My Take, we have, maybe, I think he actually leads the PMT in most guest appearances. It is Ryan Whitney getting us ready for Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, how we got there.
What we're expecting for Monday night gets us pumped up. We're going to recap the weekend. Hank is now a member of Joe Mazzulla's family. We have who's back of the week and we have Mount Rushmore season officially kicking off. We're going to do the Mount Rushmore of can't win the big one.
So maybe there'll be someone who's playing on Monday night in that. And it's going to be me versus Max versus PFT versus Hank solos this year. We'll have to think of a punishment, too. We'll have to discuss that. Yeah. Great show for you to kick off the week. The MMA event of the year, Battle of the Giants, is coming up fast.
Lineal heavyweight world champion Francis Ngannou makes his return to the cage versus Hanan Ferreira. Women's MMA GOAT Chris Cyborg takes on 2023 PFL champ Larissa Pacheco.
Johnny Ebelin goes toe-to-toe with Fabian Edwards with the Bellator middleweight title on the line. Battle of the Giants and Ganu vs. Fajera goes down Saturday, October 19th at 4 p.m. Eastern Time on ESPN Plus Pay-Per-View. Okay, let's go. Now when there is violence, I know not lots of work to be done.
No place to go washing. And then I can't name all of the songs. We're going to rock. Electric Avenue. And then we'll take it higher. We're going to rock.
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And Hank, the summer of Hank has arrived. Oh, we're going to start with game seven. I don't know. We're going to talk to Whitney for 30 minutes about game seven. We will talk about game six, but Hank...
You had the greatest day of your life on Friday. You're a part of Joe Missoula's family now. The brotherhood. I think we got to hear what transpired. If anyone missed it, I can't imagine anyone did, but Hank was on Joe Missoula's duck boat for the Boston Celtics parade, and he was fucking buckled.
and live in his best life. I saw a sports center and it was Joe Mazzulla pouring a beer on Hank's head as the recap of the Celtics championship parade. I was like, what the fuck? There's no way. There's absolutely no way. It looked like you had the best time ever, Hank. So again, I'm reluctantly happy for you. It was definitely the best day of my life. I can honestly say that. I've been riding the high all weekend, just running it back and thinking about how insanely ridiculous it was. I had it.
Absolutely no business being on that boat. The fact that I got invited is a testament to you guys in the show that it somehow ever even happened. Thank you. Did you crash the boat?
Did not crash the boat. I did take a... Take that. Take that. He just said basically we got him on that boat. I was on the boat pretty much. I did take a couple branches to the face. I was standing up. We got hit with some branches, but... Karma? We got there early. We got there at like 9 o'clock. I woke up. We got to Boston around like 2. I couldn't sleep. I was excited. So I didn't have the best night of sleep. I was a little bit running late, so I didn't eat. I didn't have any sunscreen. Oh, no.
Was that my fault? No, no, no, no. It was my fault, but I was probably not great time management. Showed up, and I was feeling it out because I told you guys before. I was like, I don't know how to act. I have no business being on this boat. I didn't win a championship. I don't know what the vibe is going to be like. And right when I got there, Missoula's team was like, you didn't bring any beers? I was like, oh, I didn't know the vibe. They're like, oh, no, we're going to get after it. It was his whole family. They were all absolutely incredible, his whole team.
his brother, his sons, his wife, everyone, and one of his best friends that he grew up with. And you. And me. That was it. That was it. And I was still feeling it out. His wife, before even the duck boat took off, she took out a huge bottle of tequila. Everyone started taking shots. And then from there, it was just off. People were...
at like throwing beers throwing nips and mcgill cutties i probably had like 10 or 15 of those to the point where i was like i might puke like i was just taking them chugging them grabbing beers stone coaling them on people people were bringing out ace of ace of uh spade bottles we were like spraying the crowd with champagne you were the front duck boat we were the first duck boat so how did that work when you were you were driving down the street and you see people on the side of the road
and they're like cheering for your float at first are you like intimidated to wave back at them because you think to yourself like they're not waving at me they're waving at coach well it was just the whole time i kept thinking how crazy it was that if i wasn't on the boat i lit i was just looking out at a sea of of myself like right just looking out at at you know my people people from boston i was like if i wasn't on this boat i would be in that crowd and
and they were all just so excited. The energy was so high. Missoula was the first person they saw, and so when they saw them, they started going nuts. So it was just like getting the crowd pumped up for the rest of the parade, which was super easy. People were so excited. There was so many people. I could not believe. I kept thinking it's got to be over soon, and we just kept going, and the crowds got bigger and bigger and bigger. People were just going insane. It was the greatest. It was something I'll never forget.
I can't even put into words how lucky I was to be able to do it. You got to experience what being a champion at the highest level of sports is. Like, that's what you got to experience on Friday. Biggest parade in NBA championship history. Is that a fact? 1.5 million people. I love parade math. That's my favorite, where they have a helicopter that flies over. They're like, that's 1.1 million. And they just show the heat picture. Yeah. Missoula's the best.
He's the absolute... I mean, he couldn't be cooler. We hung out with him for like 45 minutes before we started. The funniest, there was a very funny moment, like right after the parade route ended, they kind of turned to the side, they were stopped, and then they get back on the freeway to go back to the garden, so everyone has to sit down.
And everyone's buckled at this point, too. And Mazzulla huddles everyone around. Like I said, it's literally his direct family and his personal team and then me. You are one of his best friends. Don't discount yourself in that group. He's like, every single person here, you all played a part in this championship.
Except Hank. And then everyone started laughing. Yeah, it was so funny. That's good. So, Max, you were in charge of cutting up social stuff and having your eyes on the internet for Hank content, of which there was a whole lot. What was your favorite Hank clip? He said I looked awkward. Yeah, what was he? You did look awkward. You were so salty. You were like, yeah, I'll say it. Hank looks awkward up there. You did. You looked awkward as fuck. You didn't know anyone on the boat. You were the odd man out. I didn't know. I became lifelong friends with everyone on that boat.
They'll always have that moment together. You were awkward and you know it. You know you were awkward up there. It's a very tough situation. I don't think you looked awkward. The only time you looked awkward was when the flag bodied him. Yeah. The flag was back. Yes. That's my answer. That's my answer. That's my favorite video. That's when I realized I had to stop drinking and the only way to do that physically because I kept catching beers and then, you know, you want to pump the crowd up and just chug it or throw it down. So I was like, I got two hands on a flag and just.
And the flag dominated you. I mean, yeah. There was a couple moments where the flag got caught up and I didn't know what was going on. You were double fist pumping the flag. You did a lot of double fist pumps. Almost every clip that I saw was Hank sending the two fists out there. Just a classic move. Max was mad that people were bringing up Embiid. No, I wasn't. I actually was ecstatic to see that.
The fact that it's their championship parade and they still can't stop talking about Embiid, that's a great sign. That's great. That was a great thing for you. You live rent free. I was so happy to see that sign. Rent free. So, yeah, it was a very cool situation. Hank, I think that most people would be awkward put in that situation, but I know you get along pretty well with anybody in situations like that. Hank's a good vibes guy. You're a good vibe guy.
Well, and his whole family. Not on the show. They're from Rhode Island. It felt very natural. I was definitely a little worried, but then literally his wife, before we even took off, was like, alright, everyone's doing shots. I was like, alright, I'm going to fit in just fine here. There's got to be a word for that to describe a guy like Hank, who is just a real dickhead to everybody that he actually cares about. And then if you're a stranger, he's the biggest ray of sunshine of all
Yeah, he brought more vibes on that. He brought more vibes on that duck boat than he has on the show in forever. That is a fact. Yeah. Yes. Maybe we need to start throwing him nips. I'm just happy this is the last day of Hank's suck fest for the past two weeks. Just wait. Hank's on a roll right now. He's done. I understand people are upset about the Hank's suck fest, but our fucking producer and very good friend was on a duck boat with the coach of the NBA champions. That's...
How can we not lead the show with that? I just want the people that are complaining to know that their voice is heard. Okay. All right. Thank you, Max. I will be that person. Thank you for your service, Max. Just know that if you're in that camp, you are a Max. Yeah. Good. And Max, if a Philly team ever won, we wouldn't do the same for you? We would. Yeah, but that's different. Oh, okay. That's different. Because it'd be you. We would definitely do the same for you. Well, yeah. I mean, it's whatever. Yeah. Yeah.
Okay. Who was the drunkest at the speech? They did the speech beforehand. Smart. Porzingis. Porzingis was late, which honestly was great for me because everyone was in the tunnel waiting because they all came out as a team to the court and did the speech before the parade went off. And so everyone was just waiting around for Porzingis because he... It almost happened to me too where...
He basically tried to get off, and then the road was blocked off, so he couldn't get across. So it was like there was probably 30 minutes where we got to just mingle with the players because they were just waiting for Porzingis. That's awesome. Derek White, did he like your hair? Loved the hair. He came in, said what up. Sam Houser was drunk. He was also the man, though. Him and his whole family. A.K.A. Porzingis. His brother, Joey Houser, Porzingis. Yeah.
You end up, for people who don't know, Hank told Gaz, I'm going to go take a picture of Porzingis. And then it was just a picture of Hank standing next to Joey Hauser.
It was like 6'8". Yeah. He was wearing the hat the same way. I mean, yeah, I was very drunk at that point. Who got the bigger pop, Tatum or Brown? I was in front of them, so I don't know. Good question. Yeah, that'd be interesting. I did see that Jalen Brown lost his ring. Yeah. He had like a nice fancy ring that he brought with him to the parade. Some people were saying that Hank stole it. He also said that there's like a cash prize if someone finds it. Why wouldn't the can't you just buy a new one?
It must be. I thought that, too. It must be. It's probably a sentimental ring. Yeah. It was Putin there. Nazi Putin. Okay. You must have missed them. Okay. So great. Great weekend. It was. Yeah, it was. It was the greatest day of my life. I have a question. Yes. What did you what? What did the night look like?
well he took a nap there was yeah so there was an after party uh at cisco like with just the the organization that was blocked off to the public till like five o'clock and then once the public you know they opened the doors for the public people kind of filtered out because you know people were turning to a shit show so i went back to the hotel uh me gaz was checking into the hotel i said i'm just gonna go up to my room for a second i texted him at like 4 45 and said let me know when you're ready i'll be down and
And then I woke up at 7.15. So I took a little nap. But then, yeah, I went out. A little nappy. I went out on Southie and had a great time. A little nappy. So you didn't go out with anyone on the team at night? Not at night, no. Okay. Oh.
No, I was just curious. That wasn't a dig. I was curious. That was a dig. That's a big dig. That was a dig. I'm one to admit when it is a dig, that was not a dig. I was actually just curious. So, Hank, you just went out with your friends at night and partied. Yeah. Which could be Joe Mazzulla now.
Say you're going out with your friends. Do you have his number now? I do have his number. I mean, he invited me to his house. He was like trying. He was like, you sure you don't want to come back? I was like, I appreciate it, but I'm going to stay out. Could have napped on his couch. Yeah. Yeah. Could have choked him out. Could have punched a hole in his drywall, and that would have been good for him and his house. Okay, so incredible weekend for Hank. We do have a game seven. Stanley Cup final game seven, Monday night, tonight. The Orioles.
The Oilers, back from the dead, have absolutely dominated the Panthers. We're going to talk with Whitney for 30 minutes about the game, but...
This has a chance to be just an all-time game seven. This would be, I think, the most iconic moment in Stanley Cup Finals history if they're able to pull this off. If McDavid does. I think, yeah. And then if the Panthers do it, it kind of becomes a footnote and at the same time becomes another tally in the checkmark box of McDavid can't win the big one. Yes, that's a fact. But it has been an incredible series. Incredible.
Like, I thought the series was absolutely over. I thought it was going to be a sweep, and then, boom, you look up. I mean, the games are, you know, like two nights in between, three nights in between each game, but Oilers have just kicked the shit out of the Panthers. Did the Oilers figure out Bob?
I did. I think they figured everything out. I think they figured Bob right out. They figured it out just in time. Yeah. And it's going to be awesome. We also have double championships on Monday night because Tennessee and Texas A&M play for the College World Series. Yeah, the Vols battled back. Yeah. The Jell-O Shot Challenge.
Let's talk about the Jell-O Shot Challenge because I always thought that it was like a cool thing that the College World Series had. Did you read the same tweet as me that ruined it? No, no. I've been thinking this since last week, so you can tell me what ruined it for me. But the Jell-O Shot Challenge is...
Every College World Series in Omaha, you go there and every team has a list for their fans and it updates the tally based on how many jello shots at that bar certain fan bases have purchased. In the past, it's been kind of fun because it's just like people that go into the bar and happen to order the jello shots are
Now we've got people drone striking in jello shot orders from out of town. Correct. And does it go to charity at all or is it just the bar? Because if it's just the bar, they're geniuses. I think it's just the bar. And there might be some charity element. What ruined it for me was someone said that they have them prepackaged and yeah, people show up and just buy a bunch and then walk away. Yeah. And that's not in the spirit of the rules. Or you can call in. You should have to take the jello shot. Yes. Yes.
For its account. Yes. I feel like we're in the live ball era. Let's get back to just the basics. Yeah. Drunk people, fans taking the Jell-O shot right in front of you. Organically. You can order them for your table. That's cool. Order a couple for your table. But they all have to be taken by your fan base. Yeah, but walking in and saying, like, I'd like 10,000 Jell-O shots. Right. And then that doesn't tell me anything about your fan base. It just says that you have someone rich who could buy a bunch of Jell-O shots. Mm-hmm.
Yeah, you should have to drink them. Yeah. 100%. And it shouldn't count like... Drink them or eat them? Eat them. You take them. Take them. But it also wouldn't count...
Like if we walked in and I were a Tennessee fan and you were wearing like NC State stuff and I bought two Jell-O shots and you took one, that shouldn't count for two for Tennessee. That's NC State. Right. They should just do the breathalyzer challenge. Breathalyze every person wearing a jersey that walks out and then do an average at the end of the week. Yeah, that'd be good. Do you want to talk about the Hawk Tua girl?
Apparently she's signing merchandise now Good for her She's making hats
Good for her. Gotta take advantage. I like the Hawk to a girl just because... Who is the Hawk to a girl? Well, there was a man on the street video. Was it Nashville? I don't know where it was. I think it was Nashville. And do you want to play the video? Can you play the video for us? Spit on that thing. Yeah, spit on that thing. So I liked how simple this meme is because I saw it going around and we had a busy week last week and I kind of missed it at the beginning and
And then I caught up and I was like, oh, that's as simple of a meme as it can get. Yeah. There's no other thing to it. I like those. Yeah. All right, go ahead. Play the video. What's one move in bed that makes a man go crazy every time? Oh, you got to give him that huck. Dude.
Tua and spit all that right here. So that's it. It's as simple as possible. It's a girl talking about spitting on a cock. How many Tagliavola jerseys are just going to be labeled Hawk on the back of them next year? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, I think we can already say that's the number one fantasy football team name for 2024, right? Yes. Hawk Tua? Yeah. She's a star. She's an absolute star. A legend. She's a complete star. Yeah. What do you think about her form, Hank? Tua. Tua.
I like the message. I like the message you're sending. One Hawk Tua guy to another? It's Hawk Tua. Hank Tua? Shane Hawk Tua is his own cock. Yeah, but it's crazy because he doesn't eat anything else. Shane didn't have his first sandwich until last week. He had his first sandwich last week.
Yeah, no, she's a star in the making. It feels like we're on a really good run right now of, you know, with Edmonton Oilers fan. Yeah. Talk to a girl. We're just getting back to the basics. The basics of the internet. Yes. Attractive female does something and we're like, yes, she rules. Well, I mean, it boils down to like blowjob or tit. Yeah, right. Turns out those things do well. Damn, she's a star. If the protesters at the Travelers, the fifth major, if they just...
had tits that were just poking out there. I think their cause would be celebrated a little bit more. Yeah, so those guys... So, Scottie Scheffler won again. All he does is win. Although, only won one major this year. Can't win the big one. He won one big one. He won one big one. But, yeah, we had protesters on... Was it the 18th? It was the 18th hole, yeah. They were coming up, and the one guy had, what, like a seven-foot putt? Yeah. Tom Kim. They should...
Like, protester justice is never, because the guy, remember when they were doing the Timberwolves games, they were gluing themselves to the floor. I don't think that if you protest something at a sporting event, you shouldn't just be like, okay, now I go to jail, pay a $1,000 fine, whatever it is. Your punishment should just be directly related to the sport. They should have to go stand at the tee box and Scottie Scheffler and Tom Kim get the tee one, like, right at them.
them. That's what it should be. Or you just get handcuffed to a tree. Yeah. And you have to just live on the golf course. Yeah. Or like when you, if you, if you glue yourself to a basketball floor, you should have to then they should just re glue you to center court and you have to just be, you
trampled on for the entirety of the game. Glue you down right underneath the basket and you get dunked on. Yeah, right. Yeah, you got Rudy Gobert landing on you. You don't have to then go to jail, but if you do it at a sporting event, you should have to get your punishment immediately at that sporting event. Yeah, so they were stop big oil people, right? Okay. And I think that the Edmonton Oilers fan did so much damage
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
There was like four or five of them running everywhere. It's what you train for. Yeah. If you're a security guard and you're working at it, it's either you either get to arrest Scotty Scheffler or you get to arrest somebody that's threatening Scotty Scheffler. Yeah. And they were dumping stuff all over the green. I don't know what they were dumping. It just looked like cocaine. It might have just been cocaine. There's like a red flare, I think, as well. Yeah. Shout out Scotty keeping his composure. Yeah. He probably thought they were coming for him. His hair looked great.
Did it? Scotty's hair, yeah. I didn't see. It grew right in. It grew all the way in. So it looks pretty good right now. And then right after it was over, like the second he stepped off the green, his wife just hands him the baby. He's like, here, you look after the baby now. Well, it's also for the pictures. It's for the pictures. The pictures, the baby picture after a win is, I mean, Jason Tatum, we talked about his whole aura, but the
The video of him with Deuce is You can't not like that You have to have the coldest heart in the world To not like that If you throw a kid into a champion's arms It's instant this is awesome But then if he loses I want to see that baby face the music Afterwards And the baby should have to answer the tough ones Did Jason Tatum Did he have aura at the parade So much aura What did that look like
He was carrying around the trophy, said what up. That sounds like the trophy has aura. Yeah. It'll prop. I mean, just the pictures and videos. He looked like the greatest champion in the world. The beautiful part about winning a championship is that when you win a championship, you can just reply with the picture of him holding the trophy. It's tough. It's a tough argument. It is. I'm not arguing that he's not a champion. He's definitely a champion.
A star player holding a trophy in front of 1.5 million people. Yeah, that was a cool picture. I saw that, but that was the sun going off of it. But that's aura. Well, no, it's more the sun and the trophy. The sun has aura. Yeah. The sun has a lot of aura. You can ask Neil deGrasse Tyson about that. Yeah. The sun's just radiating aura all over the place. Okay, what other sports or any other things we have?
Did you win the 50-50 raffle? I didn't, no. I spent, I think, 300 bucks on 50-50 raffle, and the guy just sat down next to me. He's like, thank you so much for doing this. I was like, do people not normally get that much? They don't buy that much. And I was looking at it. I was like, I've never wanted anything more in my life than to win the 50-50 raffle. That might have been the end of part of my take. I thought about it when I saw the picture. I was like, if he wins, this will ruin me. Did you even get a number?
What do you mean? Like, did you get the first number? Oh, no. I usually don't even get that. That's when it sucks. Yeah. All right. None of them were correct. Yeah. You have to buy them every inning. Yeah. I bought them all at once. And then when they, they make the announcement after the game's over, I go to the website and I looked at it and I had to like refresh it. Cause I was like, this must be a different 50, 50 raffle because the first number is different from all my tickets. Yeah. Um,
But yeah, no, I mean, the bleachers at Wrigley Field are incredible. Got to take the tarps off out there. Friday afternoon, nothing better. Beer snakes going. A lot of Edmonton Oilers fans in full kits out there in the heat. Wow. Really brave in the sun. And yeah, also, you got to drink beers out of a bat. They got the bat beers out there. Yep. Yep. So now I just have that in my kitchen now that I just pour every drink into. I'm drinking out of a bat. There's nothing better. Yeah, you had a perfect Chicago weekend and Max moved. Mm-hmm.
That was fun, too, though, probably. I went to the Sphere. It was sick. Max, you moved. Yeah, I drove like 40 hours in two days. You had an incredible weekend. Yeah. Yeah, no. That was the Max parade. Yeah, I had a good weekend. I had a good dinner.
And then I drove a lot. Okay, nice. A lot of driving. Yeah, anyone who is thinking about going to the Sphere, do it. Yeah, it does look incredible. It was mind-blowing. You know who else had a great weekend? Part of me thinks my mind would get permanently blown. There was a couple moments. There was especially a moment on Saturday night.
And I'll be fully honest, I had had a lot of mushrooms both Friday and Saturday, but I did have that thought of like, will I ever be able to go back to real life? Because it was that cool. Yeah, I just I would want to just live in the sphere. It was it was like I said, the expectations were high and they blew them out of the water.
Incredible. Yeah. Shout out James Dolan. One good thing he's done in his life. And his kazoo band. Yeah. Do you think his kazoo band is ever going to play at the Sphere? I'd go see it. I would go. I would go. I'd be front row. Yeah. I didn't know if it was the Mushrooms or the Sphere, and then I just realized, why not both? And it was both. It was definitely both.
But yeah, Travis Kelsey had a great weekend too, mostly because he just missed Beer Olympics. Yeah. So he's probably very happy that he's hanging out overseas instead of having to go to Nashville. And we have a new war, Dave Grohl versus Swifties. Yes, we do. I saw that. I stand with Dave Grohl. I do too. What do you do? He said that they're doing the Errors Tour because they play their music live.
Foo Fighters are. Unlike Taylor Swift, who's not playing live. She's just lip syncing? That's what his claim was. Wow. Some people are saying, yeah. But it's also like, why can't there just be- What is he thinking? Why can't there just be shit talk? Why can't Swifties just do shit talk? That's what they do. No, they don't. They don't let- Anyone who says anything mean about Taylor Swift ever, they fucking go to DEFCON a million.
I don't even know if that's DEFCON. Yeah, but it should be like sports. You should be able to take the shit talk, fire back in kind, without trying to take away his entire career. I'm sure Dave Grohl will be fine. I did see a meme that Swifties don't hawk to a...
I don't know if there's a lot of Swift. I don't know if that's true. I saw the meme. I'm just reporting what I've seen. We're journalists. I'm reporting it. There's not a lot of crossover between like Reagan voters and Taylor Swift fans. Probably. Yeah. It's so good. It's so good. I love that for a while. All we had was the Gluck Gluck 3000. Yeah. And we've been waiting for a worthy successor. I think Hawk Tua does it. It's finally been released. What do you think your dad's saying right now?
That's my girl. Yeah. Yeah. Like that was good work. Yeah. Nice. You, you, you, you, you asserted yourself well in that interview. Yeah. Hock to, uh, okay. Anything else from the weekend? Trying to think.
Oh, we did have the first ever walk-off pitch clock violation. Yeah, that was electric. Yep. It happened to the Rockies, right? Yeah, it happened to the Nationals. Yeah. Yeah. Rockies won, I believe. And yeah, we finally got it. We were waiting for it. We needed it.
We needed it. Thank God. We also had another rematch of the fever in the sky, and then nothing really happened. It was just like a normal good basketball game. Are they just like the Washington Generals and the Globetrotters? Yeah, so they seem to play a lot. They're playing every other night. How mad are people that there wasn't a hard foul on Kaitlin Clark?
Very mad. Because there's a shitload of people who only watch the game for hard fouls on KU. Yeah, like a hawk. They're watching and they're just like rewinding every frame. That seemed like an unnecessary shoulder. There was like some shit talking, but it was just normal sports. Right. Which is, I think, what it's going to turn into. Yeah. Now, if I was a player on the fever, what I would do, if I'm like into the rotation, I
type player, I would just become her enforcer. Just get out there and wreck some people's face if they touch Caitlin Clark. Yeah. And then you just develop an enormous fan base based off that. Yeah. Just become the Caitlin Clark stopper. Yeah. By physically assaulting her. Or the Caitlin Clark stopper. No, I'm saying her teammate. Oh, her teammate. Oh, the protector. Yeah, she'd get real violent. Yes, the protector. Really violent. Yes. Okay, let's do Who's Back the Week.
Max, are you going to start doing Who's Back of the Week? Should he? That's not my choice. I think we should try it and see how it goes. Yeah, it probably will go poorly.
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Both of mine just got taken. It was going to be the protesters. Then it was going to be Travis Kelsey. It was going to be Hawk Tua. Oh, a Mets pitcher just got kicked out for cheating memes. Oh, no. What was he doing? Bad stuff. He had some of the grimmest shake on his wrist. He was Hawk Tua-ing into the ball. So I'll just say my added inspiration to dunk. That was the only thing I didn't really mention was...
How's it been going, this bender you've been on? I've been trying to do as much as I can, but after spending the day and basically being invited as a quasi-member of the Missoula family, I feel like it's my responsibility to live up to the high expectations and standard that he sets, and I feel more motivated than ever to just put in the extra work and make it happen. Hmm.
That's what he would do. That's what Missoula's would do. So earlier in this episode, you said that this was probably the best day of your life. You just hung out with Tom Brady like six days ago. Oh, my God. I forgot. Hank has been on such a streak that I forgot about that. So this was better than chilling with Tom Brady. Yeah. I mean, the one before was the first Patriots Super Bowl when they won and we got invited to the hotel. It was random. We weren't expecting it. We were just at a bar, got a text, and
Ended up at the team hotel after party and got to party with the team when it was like maybe 100 people there. That was previously the greatest night of my life. This one tops it. I think Brady's probably top four. Jeez. So you had two of the greatest nights of your life in the same week. I wish you hadn't said that. There will be downfall. I completely forgot about it. There will be downfall. Yeah, the downfall is... Football. Or real shame in a boat. Yeah. Or real shame trying to dunk. Yeah.
Real shame if you popped your Achilles trying to die. PFT. It would be a real shame. I understand. I understand why people hate on me. That was a bad boy. He deserves it after this week. I was going to say ACL. That was a bad boy. I didn't deserve to be on that boat, but it's one of those things where when you're in that situation, you have to just enjoy it. I enjoyed it as much as I could, even though it was. No, but PFT is right. The world evens out.
But not for Hank. Yeah, I'm just going to enjoy it. You know, people are going to try and take me down, tear me down. Even his bald head doesn't look that bad. Show the bald head. How'd the suntan get? Oh, you're kind of already back. The, uh...
And one of his assistants and his wife were like, you have to put on sunscreen. You have to put on sunscreen. We brought it. Don't worry. And then as we're taking off, they started putting it on me. He's like, hey, I said no sunscreen. Thankfully, they overruled him. He's got to put some on. Yeah. But you didn't at the start. And I was going to say that the two biggest pieces of advice you should have gotten or at least tried to follow up on going to the parade would be put sunscreen on your head and eat something for breakfast. Right. That's why when I was on the way there, I was like...
Oops. You wanted to blame me so bad. No. Yeah, you did. Anytime you don't eat. Looks good. Thank you. It looks good. I don't know how it looks good, but this is... Hank's just on a heater, man. What can I say? Let's just hope no shames happen.
Okay, PFT, you're who's back of the week. My who's back is the USA, baby. US. Dos Acero. What did we do? We beat the dastardly Bolivians. Oh, fuck yes. We crushed them into Bolivia. And it was a great game for Christian Pulisic. And he scored in like the first three minutes and then had a great assist later on. Team looked good. Group stage? Group stage. What do we get if we win? We get the honor of beating. Immortality. We own all of America's.
Because it's the Copa America. So we get rights to South America too. Who else in our group? The United States of America. Panama. They stink.
And then Uruguay, who's always good in these tournaments. Is there a weird country in this? Wasn't Qatar in it? Qatar was in it last time. Yeah, they were honorary Americans. Do we have any of those? We are the weird country in it. Okay. So we're not supposed to be in it. We're not in it every single time, but we're hosting the entire tournament, which is a major cuck move. Yeah. But we're using it to, I guess, get things tuned up for the World Cup when we host it. But team looked good. The lads looked good. It's still Burr Halter out. It's always Burr Halter out.
But, yeah, dos a cero. I'm excited for some soccer. Yeah. Uruguay's going to be a good game. They're good. They're very good, yes. Is Luis Suarez still playing? I don't know. I don't know. I love that guy. I don't know if he's playing in this tournament or not. He's biting everybody. Yeah, yeah. I love that guy. Okay, my who's back of the week is LeBron and Clutch being salty. I don't know if you guys have followed this. It's the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.
I guess Clutch has hired a bunch of people to go and look up old MJ stats and try to rip down MJ, and it's the most transparent move ever, knowing that LeBron might not win another title. So now they're going to try to find other ways to progress the GOAT conversation. But I know, obviously, I'm biased.
I don't understand how you can look at this and not be like, this is the pettiest, saddest thing possible. So what are they doing? They went back to the 1988 season when MJ won Defensive Player of the Year and looked up games where he had an inordinate amount of steals, and then they went and looked and saw the crediting of it, which happens in every season.
like the home road splits always happen. Yeah, it was really bad in the 70s, 80s, and I think early 90s. You can't even go back and watch some of those games. Right, and now we're in a war where like now LeBron's old plays are getting posted. It's just, I don't know. I don't understand what the end goal was. Why would you try to tear down...
If you have to try to tear down MJ to elevate LeBron, you've already lost, in my opinion. Correct? Yeah. Like, if you have to go back in time and trying to nitpick stats, you're essentially admitting that you've lost. Also, no one really cares about stats that much. And also, in the quote, in the story, Bob Ryan...
Basically said he's like, I don't use stats for all my voting. I use the eye test and he was the best defender in the league. Like, what does it matter? He was the best in the league at the time compared to other players that he was playing. Right. But yeah, there's a lot of like the John Stockton assist numbers.
Home and away splits. It happens all the time. It happens all the time, and every player that was in that era dealt with it. And you know what would be a real shame? You know what would be a real shame? If anyone finally did a story about LeBron and PEDs. That would be a real shame. That would be a shame. I'm not saying there's anything there, but you're now opening the box to ask questions. We're going to go back and do stats. He actually had his guys from his management team go back and look at MJ's stats. I don't know if it was... I mean...
Listen, it was Tom Haberstra who I like, but I don't like his work in this. Nick Wright, who we do like as a friend, he... I don't know if he was joking, but he was saying he had a piece in the working of this. Of course he did. Clutch Media...
They do. Like, they have media members that are in their back pocket. So it wouldn't shock me if this is what happened. Yeah. They're like, hey, go look at all these stats. I don't think Nick Wright, you would even have to pay him for that because every little bit that you can make Michael Jordan appear worse makes him appear more right. Right.
And I like Nick, but it's just a very pathetic thing to go back in time and try to nitpick every stat. And what's happening now is people are digging up LeBron stats and game film, and you could do it for every single player ever. Yeah, how many times did he travel? Right. How about we take a look at that? How many carries did he get? I watched one today where he got credited with an assist. It was an outlet pass, and the guy he passed to caught it at half court and took like 15 dribbles.
Yes, it's the home finger. Right. Which happens, but it's pathetic. And again, I don't want it to get to a point where we start asking PED questions. That would be a shame. Yeah, also just because I don't think LeBron did PEDs, but some people might think that. The fact is that he's played it a crazy long amount of time without significant injuries. Also, I don't really get.
Like, the LeBron-MJ thing is going to just be an age thing at this point. It's going to be if you're 30 years or younger, you would think LeBron's the GOAT. If you're 30 years or older, you think he's the GOAT.
You're not going to change really anyone's opinion who's on whichever side they're on. Just let it play out, and then there's going to be another player that we're going to do this for. That's how sports debates work. But you can also look at the two years that he didn't play and then say what would MJ have done if he had played those years. A couple titles. Yeah. But it's just... I think it's been decided in the fact that there's the camps, and the camps will have their thoughts. But to go back and watch game film and try to tear down MJ is so...
Again, I think it admits that you're desperate. Well, it definitely admits that you're playing from behind. It's loser behavior, for sure. I could see myself doing it to somebody that I hated. Yeah. But I don't think I would ever do that to somebody that I was just trying to prove that my favorite player was slightly better than them. Right. Right. You saw this, Hank. But if I hated that player, I would definitely do it. 100%. Desperate. Desperate. Desperate. Desperate.
Okay. What? What were you going to say? No, go ahead. Positive vibes. I'm good vibes. Say it. What were you going to say? I'm good vibes. No, say it. No, I'm good vibes. Say it. No, what were you going to say? It is the same playbook as you and Coach K.
Uh, no, I've actually had all facts. What are you talking about? That's what they're saying. No, no, no. I didn't go back in. You're trying to get losses credited to him. No, no. What? He, he left the team, a bad team because of an injury. That's just a fact. I didn't have to look anything up.
But you think those losses should be on his record. Well, I think Pete Gaudette should get an apology more than anything. It's not that Big Cat hates Coach K. He's just a massive Pete Gaudette fan. Yeah, and there's also not... I'm not trying to elevate... I'm not doing it on behalf of anyone else. That's true. So it's not like this is my goat. I'm trying to take down Coach K. I just hate Coach K. That's why I didn't say it. And I also...
All the things that I did, I didn't go and watch film and try to take away wins from him. You were in the lab, though. I mean, I know my Coach K history very well. Yeah, no, that's why I didn't say it. But who am I propping up? That's true. And there's no one I'm propping up on the other side. Pete Gaudet. Yeah, Pete Gaudet, I guess. But who else would I be propping up? It's not like a goat debate. I know that people say Coach K is the goat. I just don't like him. But there's not another person I say, oh, he's actually better.
True. That's what I didn't say. I wish you had stayed positive. But that's what I didn't. I really wish you had stayed positive. I did. I did. I did stay positive. I didn't say it. That's what makes the whole LeBron versus MJ thing so annoying is that people that are massive LeBron James fans, I think they still like Michael Jordan. I think they acknowledge that Michael Jordan was a great player, but because they have to do tricks on it, they have to give him the Hawk Tour, and they have to go back and then try to tear down somebody else who they also like.
accomplishments to make their guys seem a little bit better. I admit that Coach K, if you make the argument, is probably the best college coach. I hate his guts. Roy Williams had more success in North Carolina. God damn it. I wish I, no, the Achilles wouldn't be the worst. No, no, it would be. It would be a real shame. It wouldn't be the worst.
You can't just have positive vibes. I'm positive. One thing. That's why I didn't say it. Hank waving the guy. I can think of another guy that waved a flag on television that then had a massive Achilles problem. That could be Hank. Hank, you're not going to like this. When Mahomes fans start doing this to Brady, you're going to be very upset. They are going to come and do that. They're going to be like, oh, Brady's defense is carrying him. They're going to do that.
I just don't pay as much mind, I guess, to the debate. But this was like a real article that was written. The article was crazy. That is clutch. And they're basically like being... They came out with a report being like, if you draft Bronny, it doesn't mean LeBron's coming back to the Lakers. Right, right.
Which just opens the door for a lot of help. They're just trying to hold everyone hostage. If this were just memes online, I would not have paid any attention to it. It was an actual article, like journalists doing work trying to tear down MJ. For what? For what? Okay, Max, you ready? Yeah. Ready. Your debut? Who's back of the week? Who's back of the week is Playboy. Why? Why?
Uh, Oilers girl is posed for Playboy and she looked good. Okay. Is it still a magazine? Uh, I, I just read this. It is actually only fans ask now. What? Yeah. Playboy has like an only fans ask site that you have to like pay for like a subscription based service. So they don't even have the articles anymore. I think they also have that, but this is, this is what falling off the phone so far. Well, now they're back. They basically invented porn.
Yeah, now they're back. Because Euler's girl did a photo shoot. I think she just did that photo shoot for the Instagram. Yeah, they were basically the original Instagram algorithm. Playboy? I got a question for you guys. I mean, they were just pictures of hot chicks, yeah. I got a question for you guys. Talk about algorithm. I don't know why, but I saw the video of the Russian guy getting shot in the head like 100 times today. I didn't see that, but you know what? That was too much. I don't know why that was...
Just on my In my algorithm I just said this to Max a second ago I was watching a video And sometimes like the next video just auto plays On Twitter X videos And the next one that I saw Was just a guy in the middle of the street getting hit by a car Going like 100 miles We're doing snuff films I saw that as well It was like 140 miles an hour I hope he's okay When he lands What's going on? You guys didn't see the Russian one was wild
I mean, Twitter's just the way Twitter you can't. There's no if you go in the replies, it's just all spam. Yeah. I don't know either of these these things you're talking about. It's just a guy getting hit by a car. Mine was just like three Russian soldiers like running in like an open field and then a drone hits one of them. And then he's like badly injured and he tells his buddy behind him, shoot me in the head and he shoots him in the head. Yeah. I didn't need to see this. Those drone. I saw it way too much. Those drone videos are everywhere. They're terrifying. Terrifying. Terrifying. Terrifying.
Okay, yeah, that was a nice who's back with that. What, you don't like boobs anymore? No, no, no. I took it to a bad place. I'm putting my hand up. We went to boobs. It had been bothering me how much I had seen that one guy die all day. Also, Playboy just completely lost the business model here. We've seen her boobs. You get Playboy to see boobs of girls...
Whose boobs you haven't seen yet You can kind of see her boobs again though Kind of but the boobs were way better in the original video Yeah we said at the time Boobs in the wild Are the hottest boobs Boobs you don't expect Yeah but it's always good to see other angles of boobs That's true you do need to do your research But they were covered It felt like a step back for her actually
I do stand by her take on the haters need to shut up. She's right. Fuck the haters. Fuck the haters. Ben Affleck, Oilers girl. Fuck the haters. Fuck the haters. Okay, let's get to our interview with Ryan Whitney. We're going to talk about Game 7. Get real hype for Game 7. Before we do that, PFT, you got a couple ads. Then we're going to do Mount Rushmore. Mount Rushmore.
Part of my take is sponsored by BetterHelp. When life goes so fast, it's important to take a moment to celebrate your wins and make adjustments for the rest of the year. Therapy can help you take stock of your progress and set achievable goals for the next six months. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge.
Take a moment, visit BetterHelp.com slash PMT today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash PMT. And now here's Ryan Whitney.
Okay, we now welcome on one of our favorite guests in the entire world. It is Ryan Whitney, and I cannot believe we are talking to him before a game seven of the Stanley Cup final. The Edmonton Oilers have come back from 3-0.
To force a game seven on Monday night, tonight, as you're listening to this. They dragged the Panthers back to Florida. Yes. Drag them back to Burda, baby. So, Whit, let's start with this. How the hell has this happened? What has occurred in the last three games that have gone from a team that looked like they were absolutely dead to now look like they are the better team on the ice?
I would say many things, but I kind of lean towards what you guys trolled me and trolled PK Suvan with and have trolled forever nonstop about Connor McDavid and him being the greatest athlete in the world right now. Better at his sport than any other person is at their sport. And you made jokes about the ice time and jokes about the lack of titles.
And now he's one game away. And everything changed in game four. He had four points. Game five, he had another four points. First player in the history of the league to get back-to-back four-point games in the Stanley Cup final. It's been insane to watch. This team, just thinking about tonight and thinking about this game, it gives me goosebumps. And
And obviously I'm an Oilers fan, but I think all hockey fans even feel that way because we're kind of witnessing history. It's happened once before, 1942. PFT's boy Hitler was alive when it fucking happened. I know he's not your boy, but you have made many a joke. But it's just something that this team has figured out each series how to play against their opponent as the series has gone on.
First round, not necessarily the case. They made easy work of LA. They were a lot better team than them. But then the second round, right? They're down 3-2 to Vancouver. They come back and win that. He made a goaltending change. Stuart Skinner's been incredible since. But he ended up putting in Calvin Picard and started him a couple...
We'll be right back.
changing the lines the way Chris Knobloch has. He's had a masterclass in coaching. What this guy's done, it's incredible. He's had numerous guys in and out of the lineup, guys up and down the lineup, different lines, changing up pairings on the defense. It's been wild to see. And then it all came together with that awe.
offside challenge in game six, which was just the biggest turning point I've ever seen. Florida makes it 2-1 10 seconds after Edmonton makes it 2-0. They challenge it. It was offsides by the slightest margin. I actually didn't think it was, but then a picture came out after and showed that it really was just barely. But everything that this coach has touched...
has turned to gold from him coming in when they were in last place or second to last place, like in middle of November to now where they won, went away from winning the Stanley cup. It's an incredible story, not only in hockey, but in all of sport. And I think it's going to be just a wild night. I think it's going to overtime, which I didn't think it ever happened. Somebody told me it did. It might've been in the twenties or thirties for all I know, but game seven overtime for the Stanley cup. I feel like this season has been so crazy that it might happen tonight. I'm,
I'm pumped. You just pumped me up. I'm very excited. It's been an awesome series to see how it shifted around. With McDavid, do you think that there's any chance? He heard the haters out there saying, you're never going to win the big one if you're so great. How come you haven't accomplished this? Do you think that he's heard any of that?
I don't know. He seems like one of those ultra focused, super serious guys. That's that's I'm not in the room. I guess guys love him. And he seems like one of the dudes when he's in the room. But with media, he's always been I don't really want to say standoffish, but almost just like I have no interest in doing media. He's not somebody that's looking to get his brand out there or anything like that. I think his whole singular focus his entire life has been on winning the Stanley Cup. He's a he's a.
child prodigy. He's been the greatest player since he first started skating. He's one of those stories that for everyone who says, yeah, like, you know, the best player at eight is never the best player at 12 and the best player at 12 is never the best player at 16. He's the anomaly. Him and Crosby and Gretzky and Lemieux, there's a few guys that are just born in every sport to be the greatest. And that's been him since a very young age. His dream's been to win the Stanley Cup. Now he's leading a team that has had a lot of
I would say, dark days. I mean, when I was there, it was called the decade of darkness. It certainly hasn't been the case since he arrived, but they still have had...
some devastating playoff losses. And to me, it's like you've lost the last two years to the Stanley cup champs. They got swept in the conference finals by Colorado. And in 2022 last year, they lose to Vegas in the second round and they go on to win. And it's now, it seems like it's his time. It didn't seem this way a week ago or whatever it was when it was three Oh, and it looked like it was going to be a drumming, but something has happened. And I think for him, it's like,
nothing matters until I get that cup and he could go on and he's, he's breaking records that people thought were never even going to be sniffed. I mean, he's touching Gretzky point per game levels in the playoffs. He grabbed a hundred assists this year, which Kucherov from Tampa Bay did as well. They were the fourth and fifth player to ever do it after Gretzky Lemieux and Bobby or so he's
done things along the way that have proved that he is the greatest player in the league and in the world, but nothing matters without the cup and all the great ones. They end up getting a Stanley cup. No disrespect to Joe Thornton or Jerome McGinley, like Connor McDavid's different than these guys. So without the cup, it's, it there's this emptiness there. And now he's this close. That's why I, I,
I it's one game momentum. I don't believe carries over and game to game in, in, in the Stanley cup playoffs. It's just like a new game within itself. But when you have a guy like this, right. I just, I can't imagine he doesn't take over. Well, he has those plays. I think it was, it was a game five when he had that assist, uh,
to Corey Perry that was just, he basically just took on the entire Panthers team and then at the last second dumped it to Corey Perry for a perfect one-timer with an open goal. It's like those are the type of plays that no one else can make and he's making them at the highest level, at the highest stage.
He has the assist record. Yeah, I mean, it's been awesome to watch. It's been incredible to watch. You always want to watch greatness. So in terms of the game-to-game adjustments, because it's a great point, and it's one of my favorite things about watching seven-game series, just whether you're talking about hockey, baseball, basketball, but the game-to-game adjustments that teams make to figure out their opponent,
And like finding that special sauce, like that was even when the Blackhawks were making their runs, Quinville was always like we were down a couple times in the Stanley Cup or the series and just be like, find those adjustments. So those adjustments have been found. What do the Panthers do back? Because it feels like they're on their heels right now.
That's what I don't know. For the Panthers, I think their fans right now are most panicked about the power play. And Edmonton's power play has carried them for years. It's been, I've called it on Chicklets, the greatest power play in the history of hockey, which people laugh at. But then you look at some of the numbers and they snap it around and create so many opportunities. Even if they don't score, it's like momentum switched in the game because of their power play. But the Panthers, they have nothing going.
Now, credit has to be given to the Oilers PK when when Woodcroft was fired in November and Knobloch came in. He's talked about that. He had no idea. He had never really ran a penalty kill and he wasn't ready to do it at the time. So he had Mark Stewart, who had been coaching there prior and stayed on the staff when Woodcroft was let go. He played in the NHL a long time. I played with him in junior year.
He was a hard-nosed defenseman, played on the penalty kill, knew what he was doing. He gave it to him. And their PK has been outstanding since. I think they've killed off 44 of the last 45 in the playoffs. It's clipping at like 94%. It's just unstoppable what they've done. They ended up taking McDavid and Dreisaitl off the PK and just giving guys really like...
significant roles on the penalty kill and they had pairings for the forward. So the same two forwards are out each time, one after another. And they've like had this cohesiveness where they have so much trust in each other that that every other team's power play becomes really like bad against the Oilers. Right. For Florida, there's so much skill there.
But they're like standing still. And Edmonton pressures. They're not moving the puck around. They're not getting into their set. So they're carrying into the zone. Edmonton's pressuring. And all of a sudden, they're never able to get set up. So much so that Edmonton's getting breakaways shorthanded. They're scoring shorthanded goals. They're getting chances when they're down a man. It's one of those things where...
you need to like at least get two, three, four shots on net on the power play and nobody can do it against Edmonton. So if I'm the Panthers going into the game, I guess this morning or Sunday morning at practice, they were working on the power play a lot. They're throwing Tarasenko onto the top unit for tonight's game seven. He hasn't been there. Brandon Montour, who's a really good offensive defenseman, struggled in the playoffs, even kind of struggled this whole season. He's now off as the number one guy running that power play. It's now Oliver Ekman.
and Larson. They've moved him there. So they're just looking for answers. It's a great question, Big Cat, because they had everything wrapped up. It was done. It was done. And I was actually in Edmonton for games three and four. It was such a bummer. I think they got three goals in about six minutes in game three. All of a sudden, Edmonton...
mounts this comeback at the end they're unable to tie it it's like ah series is over and all these lunatic Oilers fans are like Oilers and seven Oilers and seven I was playing golf with a guy and he's like no they're gonna they're going to seven I'm like do you believe that are you just like saying that as a fan he's like no they're they figure teams out throughout the series just win game four at home steal one at five we ain't losing in six and then it's a coin flip I love it they all they all described it to perfection and they blew him out in game four and
I think, I think Florida really needs Bobrovsky to show up too. Is he hurt? Is he hurt? I don't know. Apparently he didn't practice Sunday either, which is very rare for him. Yeah. I don't, obviously at this point you're not getting any news. You're not getting any updates from anyone. So he could be hurt. I mean, he's looked like he's struggling all of a sudden. Now they've kind of figured out on these breakaways. They're going to their backhand. You saw Connor Brown score a goal like that. Um,
Somebody else scored a goal like that. I'm just drawing a blank, but Florida just needs to get that first goal too. And like I said, going into game six, I was like, everyone's picking the owners. I don't like this. I'm kind of panicking because everyone's saying no chance they lose at home. Edmonton scores first. It ends up five one, but if Florida can get that first one tonight and then the crowd gets going, what happened in game five? I wasn't down there, but
uh, biz and Grinnelli, all the guys were there and they mentioned like the crowd just went silent when Edmonton went up scared, you know what? Yeah. They get scared. That was game three in Edmonton that these fans, they went in nervous. It's nervous energy. They're loud, but boom, all of a sudden it's like, fuck, it feels like two in a game seven that like every shifts like overtime almost. Right. Yeah. Right. Can you, can you decline a penalty?
I wonder if you can. I mean, talk about a coach getting fired immediately after the game if they lost, if he's declining penalties. But it's one thing that, yeah, like Dan, they're getting more chances down a man than they are giving up. I said that during the Caps Ranger Series. I think Big Cat called me an idiot. I'm like, no, but I think it does work. There's something to it where you're just so pressed.
on these power plays, and you don't even think about defending. It would be awesome if it worked, though. If a coach did it and it worked out for him, that'd be the big balls moving all the time. And then they scored that shift five on five? Yeah, yeah, that'd be great. Damn, you're really holding on to me calling you an idiot. Well, no, it was a lot of people called me an idiot, yeah. I think I forgot this one. No, no. No, I remember I was an idiot for a second. I am still an idiot. It's a bad take. Don't get me wrong. But, yeah, so, hey, I got a question, though, important question about biz.
Did he just jinx the Oilers? With the champagne? With the champagne spraying. He doesn't count for anything. He's not a real human being. He picked the Panthers. He picked the Panthers. He's picked the Panthers in the series. And he's spraying champagne. He picked them every game.
But he's on so many different substances that are ripping through his body that he might have thought he was at like a PWHL game. He doesn't even know what's going on. He's just walking around in biz land with belly button cut off shirts, just living his life. Like, I don't think I saw the champagne and it was disgusting. It was more about the fact that that was the last Oilers possible game of the year. So all he was in a suite. I don't know whose suite they were in. So all the suites.
were given champagne to celebrate a season as a season ticket holder and a suite owner. So that's why the champagne was there. And the city Edmonton knows the job is far from done. That's just what's so scary about this is you have this legendary comeback and you force this game seven. I know. Nothing matters if they can't get it done.
Yeah, I did spray champagne, I think, after game two of the Stanley Cup. So I don't necessarily believe in those jinxes. And you guys won. And we won. But Biz doing it when he's actually picking against that team, it was just very confusing to me. I didn't know who he was jinxing.
But Nicky Smokes. He's so confusing. He's so confusing. Nicky Smokes has been the greatest move. I mean, that's like the one thing that should make you feel comfortable is that Dave has another million dollar bet on the Oilers. And it seems like all he can do right now is win. I don't know if he pulls this one off. It's like he should retire for life.
Cause he pulls this one off and then he hit Scheffler today. I think for like another 340 grand profit, it's like, what the fuck is going on with this guy right now? So yeah, having him in the corner with all his million dollars winners, that's a great thing. And then as I mentioned, McDavid in 2010, the Olympics in Vancouver, I was on the team. I wasn't playing really at all. I was sitting on the bench, tied it up, going into OT. We're in Canada. And you're just thinking like,
Crosby scoring this goal, right? Like these are the people that are born to do these things that I brought up. That's why it's like more than Dave's million dollars and more than mush, Nikki smokes and more than anything else in this series. I think Connor McDavid is born to end up like winning this game. Like,
that'll be his legacy. Not only did he get his first cup in Edmonton, the first cup in Canada since 1993, but he did it coming back from an old three deficit against the best team in the league all year. Pretty much. Yeah. It'd be incredible. So who had a better weekend, uh, McDavid or, or RA? Cause I heard that RA and the Oilers lady, are they engaged now?
I have no idea. Apparently, R.A. was representing her and she was talking about OnlyFans. And then we brought her on the show in easily the most awkward, bizarre, tentative interview that Chicklets has ever been a part of because she got on and all I think it just hit her like, what am I doing right now?
So R.A.'s telling us that, you know, she's got OnlyFans and he's reaching out on her behalf. I'm like, what world am I living in? Then she comes on. She's like, no, I don't even want any of this. It was like, this is bizarre. We look like absolute creeps. Now she's signed with Playboy, apparently. She was at the game. I saw her chest bumping with R.A. and Biz. What's...
I'm at home. I got the newborn. We got Cal. We got Ryder. Wyatt. We're just hanging out. I'm like, what is my show doing? What are these guys doing? They're with tits McGee. Biz has a belly shirt on. R.A.'s crippled. Nikki Smokes is crying in the corner. What the fuck is happening to the NHL season? It's been awesome. Are you going Monday night? Yeah, it was funny. We have to go to Vegas for the awards and the draft. So I had a flight like Tuesday evening. And...
you know, things are crazy around the house right now. And she's like, are you going to the game? I was like, no, I guess I got to go to Vegas Tuesday. And I knew I'd already be away for four or five nights. She's like, you have to go to that game. Oh, hell yeah. She knew she's like, you,
you have to and I to be in the building with a chance at like hockey history on the team that I root for and it's going to be something special I just can't wait for the vibe of like the game because like I said before it's it's every shift is like oh gee it's just it's just and I think that this I think it's
going to do amazing ratings wise because people kind of were dogging on the fact that it wasn't on Saturday or Sunday. It couldn't be Saturday with game six Friday. Maybe they do Sunday, but they've given the teams two days off in between the travel because it's about 9000 miles away from each other. So Monday night, nothing else on TV and boom, here we go. Game seven. Yeah, this has got to be the most mileage that the cup has ever put on it, right? Because the cups in the building when it's a clinching game. So ever since game four, the cups just been going back and forth.
Yeah, exactly. I think that – oh, yeah, I see what you're saying because Boston and Vancouver, I don't know if that was technically further than Florida, Edmonton, but that was 2-2, so it's like it wasn't going to Game 5. You're right. So this – yeah, the cup is just gas. So apparently Game 4, which is like a – I don't know if it's newer, but now like when teams have the chance to clinch –
at the away teams arena, they fly in family, friends, everyone's coming in. So Florida flew everyone in. They flew in like the morning of the game and then they flew right back out. I guess on the way back out, like there was a couple like people passing out on the plane from the turbulence, from the dehydration. Then there was a doctor helping people on the plane and the,
the overhead compartment open and a bag buried him in the head. If I'd known that before game five, I would have known the Oilers were winning because the Florida trip back home for the family members was such a disaster. So then they lose that game five. I guess then the Florida GM's like, nobody's going back there for game six. We're getting the job done. No, they get smoked. Now they're coming back. So it's just been crazy to see the switching in what's happened for each team because Florida,
After game three, we were talking about what Florida had done to Edmonton. And in fairness, Edmonton played unreal in game one. Yeah, they did. There's a new thing. I guess it's in every sport, but with hockey, it's somewhat new. I've seen it's like the Deservo wind meter. All these advanced stats. Edmonton was like 99% Deservo wind meter. But Bobrovsky stole the show. Then he gets the shutout in game two where Florida played really well.
And then game three, I already mentioned, they just bang, bang, bang. It's 4-1, and that game's over. So even though they were down 3-0, I was like, Edmonton has played way better than 3-0 shows, but it's 3-0. It's done. They need one more. Holy shit, we got to seven. It's crazy. It's awesome. I just did the math real quick. The Cup has traveled, I believe, 10,000 miles. Damn.
Damn. That's a lot of mileage on that cup. That guy Phil Pritchard, the keeper of the cup, he's got to be hurting right now. Does the cup get frequent flyer miles or does that go to the league? How does that work out? I think the cup could be on a private jet. I would hope the cup's with league members.
League members on a PJ. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because like that's you got to keep you got to keep the cup safe back and forth with moving away from hockey for a quick second. Do you have anything to say to Joe Missoula's first cousin Henry Lockwood?
Summer of Hank, baby. Poor Maxie's over there crying in his Cheerios, just hating life because Hank keeps on winning. The man even had to shave his head and looks pretty frigging good, I'd say. Yeah. Thanks, Whit. I saw a couple pictures of him at Loco, which my friend actually owns. Great spot in South Boston. And Hank just looked wrecked. He looked crippled. I said, Summer of Hank, baby. Yeah. Yeah. He's crushing it. He thought he saw Kristaps Porzingis, but it turns out... That's what I wanted to ask. I...
I thought it looked like him, Hank, but were you just so smothered you had no idea? I mean, that guy's probably eight inches shorter than Kristaps. Yeah, well, it's Sam Hauser's brother, and he's like 6'8". Joey Hauser, yeah. He's still, yeah, five or six inches smaller than Porzingis. But he was like a tall white guy wearing the same hat. Hey, Kristaps, can I get a picture? I said it to Gaz, and he's like, that's not Porzingis. I was like, oh, shit. But then I knew, I met them before, so I went up and talked to him. Hank looks so drunk. Hank, let me ask you a question. Let me ask you a question.
As a guy whose hair is thinning and it's slowing down, are you a little nervous that it ain't going to necessarily grow back to what it was? I'm a little nervous for sure, but I got good reviews on the ball, so worst case scenario, I can just kind of keep it short. Yeah, that's true. That's very true. He said that he got more gazes than nates, so that's good. Well, that's because he had a goddamn hat on the whole time like that idiot sales guy. What do you think about Hank's nap?
He took a big nap after the parade. So that brought me back to Marathon Monday in college. In Boston, it's a very special day, and you rip it up hard. And you go as hard as you can from about 8.30 a.m. till I'd say 3.30 to 4 in the afternoon. Then you get a quick shutdown before the big night out. So I did not hate on that nap at all, Hank. That's exactly what happened. Yeah. The after party ended at like 4.30. I slept till like 7.30.
Had a great night. I'm a big sleep is death guy, though, there. Because if I go to sleep, I'm just never getting back up. But, Dan, that's us olds. Yeah, true. At younger, you hop back up ready to go. And the only other option would be to do some very illegal RA substances instead of napping. And you don't want to be a part of that. No, Hank would not do that. No, you don't want to do that. At all.
No, Hank, you wouldn't do that, right? Absolutely not. Remember, Hank, when we went to the Final Four in Wisconsin, beat Kentucky, and then they played Duke on Monday night? Sunday we had this client thing, and I made the clients give me – they're like, we're going to show you the court, and you're going to get to go see the whole court and everything.
And I was like, I have to drink while we're on the court. And they're like, you can't. I was like, if you don't let me drink while we're on the court, I'm done. Yeah, that's it. I'm going to bed, and I'm done. And so they let me bring a Sprite and vodka as I walked around on the court. I was like, there's just no way I can keep this going. Once the seal's open, you're like, if I stop drinking, I'm going to be hung over, and then I'm done.
One hour of not a drink, and you're just like, I want to go home so bad. If I look at a couch, I'm done for the night. Yeah, right. You sit down for too long. It's too good. I sat down. I'm not getting up ever again. Well, that's why the thing I've been thinking about was that was a crazy two days.
Feels like Biz has been doing that for a week straight. Oh, yeah. I don't know how him and R.A. are alive. He's an animal. Did you guys see the clip on Chicklets? So Biz hadn't drank in about nine months, I think. And I don't even know how he does that. It's crazy. He's very active in the weed game, I'd say, throughout that process. So we went to Edmonton.
You know, he went to Florida to start the... He's been to every game. He'll have gone to every game, I think. And he hadn't drank, and he starts drinking, and then the first pod we did after he started drinking, he just started off. He goes, boys, I forgot how awesome drinking was. Yeah.
He is so back in the mix, and he's just hammering pints. He's crushing Pink Whitney. He's just doing everything. And, yeah, the biz bender. And then the fact that we go from this to Vegas. I know. And then he goes to the Calgary Stampede, which is an all-time 10-day, like,
Rager in Calgary. So who knows when the hell he's at the end of this thing. We're going to see another nine month California sober. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I mean, it is just watching RA and biz going like, I don't know how either of them are alive and just listening also to spitting chiclets like RAs voice when he's like, it's the show. It
It's great. This is what people love, though, because they want to see everyone get in the mix. You know, it's like you guys are you're not covering it like journalists. You're covering it with tank tops and champagne. We see our we see some friends of ours that are like legit journalists or legit on TV at these cup finals games. And all of us just have beautiful buzzes on. And they're just like, you know, they're they're going to have their beers when they're done. When the game's over, we're like, ah, they're like, what is wrong with you guys? Chicklets, baby. Yeah.
Yeah, Biz has to be so happy that the Cup's on ESPN and not on TNT so he doesn't have to work afterwards, right? I know. He couldn't be doing half this stuff, I think, if he had to get on TNT. Maybe he could. He is built different. Who knows with that guy? It's every other year. So, yeah, next year there will not be the –
the biz run of the cup finals that we're seeing right now. How much credit do you give yourself personally for the Oilers having this type of resilience? Because I mean, going down three, nothing is Stanley cup. It's tough to battle back from, uh, but getting told that you stink and that you suck by Ryan Whitney is gotta be pretty demoralizing too. So you, you sewered them multiple times this year. I quit. Yeah. I quit. Yeah. You had to do your emergency press conferences. Yep. I quit when they lost to the San Jose sharks, the worst team in the league. And, um,
Yeah, I would say I regret that one a little bit. I've said how sorry I was. And I got to be honest, I never stopped watching games and I knew I really couldn't quit them, but I felt like I had to quit them. And maybe that woke him up. I would like to think it was me a little bit in the end. It might have been the coaching change and McDavid and Dreisaitl and some amazing play from Evan Bouchard and many others. But.
Now that they're where they're at, it's like, well, thank God I did that. It did possibly get these guys going. I can't wait if they can get it done. I'm going to get down in the room. I'm friends with the equipment managers there, and I'm going to sneak my way down there, maybe get a picture with the cop and say, hey, guys, you're welcome. They're probably just going to throw up.
Get your name on the cup. Yeah. I get my name on the cup one way or the other. Yeah. All right. So last question. Rowback question. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. Promo code take. 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Instead of a prediction, why don't you give me what it looks like for the Panthers? What do they have to do to win? And what do the Oilers have to do to win?
Panthers to win need Bobrovsky to play great. The Oilers have proven that they're going to be able to get their chances and they're going to be able to have chances and opportunities to score. He's let in some weak goals, I'd say. He's going to need to be great and they're going to need to score a power play goal. The Oilers, I don't think they really need to change much. I think one thing that they made this third line, as I said before, they've switched up their lines constantly and all of a sudden they have this third line
of Yanmark, Henrik, and Connor Brown. Connor Brown was brought in this year. He tore his ACL last year, couldn't play. This year he comes in on a one-year deal, and he's got the ability to play with McDavid. They played in junior together. There's all this promise, and he didn't score for about 65 games, whatever it was. Like, it was a nightmare for the guy. And I said before the playoffs, like, it doesn't matter.
how bad you are in the regular season. You can change the entire discussion of your season based on a playoff performance. He was a healthy scratch, I think the first four or five games of the playoffs, and has been incredible since. So that third line has been huge for them. If that third line can get a goal, and then their power play can get a goal, Edmonton goes on and wins the Stanley Cup. So I know I'm mentioning both power plays, but when they're that valuable in a game like this, you got to think that both teams get two to three points
I think the refs hopefully will keep it pretty even and at least give a chance to one team. If another team has a chance, you know, you can't really end up calling this game three power plays for one and none for the other, unless it's really dominating on that one team's aspect or ability to play the game. But I just think it's goaltending in games like this. So Stuart Skinner is undefeated in games four through seven, this player.
Biz told us a story about Wayne Gretzky because Wayne Gretzky's brother is in the Edmonton organization. He said, Stuart Skinner, you might not think he's an elite goaltender, but every step of the way he's won big games and he's shown up in big moments. And he's like, that's the guy who at some point will win us a cup. That's what, you know, Biz told us that story. So there is something for those big game goalies. Like that's a real thing.
Just show up when it matters. That guy's done that. I guess he's the youngest of 10 kids, so you know he was just, as a youngster, just trying to get anything he could, just looking for food at dinner, just getting beat on by older siblings. He seems like a super level-headed guy, too. He does interviews after he plays bad. He's soft-spoken, very open about what he was bad with. He's not trying to blame others. Just seems like a real level-headed guy, and that
I mean, a personality trait like that only can help you the higher the pressure. He did an interview today I saw where he's like, I've been dreaming about this my whole life and I can't wait for tomorrow. So every guy is going to say that. And I just can't wait to see how it plays out. It's true drama and it's going to be an amazing game. Because he's from Edmonton, too. Yeah, that's the other part. It's fucking awesome. All the pressure to win a cup for the Oilers. And I know that there's some Canadians who probably hate the Oilers.
But overall, I would think that tonight the entire country or most of the country is rooting for them to get the cup back to Canada. It's the McDavid part. McDavid kind of transcends that, I would imagine. I was thinking that I think that Toronto Maple Leafs fans probably aren't. And I think that Montreal fans might not be rooting for him, too, just so that they can say, like, we're the last team to win it.
Yeah, that's possibly true. I don't know about Toronto as much as Calgary fans definitely aren't. Calgary fans, the Battle of Alberta, they're not fucking around. They don't need Edmonton with a cup, especially as they head towards a rebuild. And I know they beat Vancouver, so maybe those fans aren't. But overall, I think some people in Canada, even though they have their favorite teams, they want to see the cup come back to where they think the game originated from.
It's coming home. I guess it did. So it's interesting because going into this game seven, I feel like if Edmonton wins, this is the most iconic Stanley Cup finals in history, right? I think so too. Being down 3-0, fighting back. And McDavid's first. And McDavid's first cup. Going up against the Panthers. Everything says bet on Edmonton in this game because it would be an all-time moment for the NHL.
It would be an all time moment for the league. And then like at the same time, like Florida has this panic for fucking three straight games. And then if they can get it done, it's like, Oh, who gives a shit? We won the cup. Like it just, it's so crazy that, that the difference in storylines, depending on who wins this game, because no matter what, if Edmonton loses, like, yeah, amazing comeback, but it did, you could have just lost that fourth game at home. Like you lost the cup. And yeah, I, I, I,
15 years ago, Sidney Crosby, who was the next great one and has turned in, who outperformed every single expectation that was laid before him. He won his first Stanley Cup in a game seven on the road in 2009. And now the next greatest player since Sid has a chance on the road to get his first trophy.
in 2024. So the storylines are just through the roof. Paul Maurice, I believe he has the most wins in the history of the league without a Stanley cup. He was this close up three. Oh, there's that coaching storyline, knob block and him. I think it's the biggest margin or the biggest difference between games coached in the NHL and the history of the league going up against each other in the cup finals. So there's just so many different things that, that you can kind of point towards to like,
This game decides everything. You get the greatest player in the game in the greatest game possible. So it's a dream scenario for the league. Are we expecting like on the officiating side, referees swallow their whistles in Game 7?
I would hope so. I think that they will. I think like even those guys know, like let the players decide this thing. And I would be shocked if we don't have a really well-reffed game tonight because like looking at how the finals has gone, I know there have been a couple complaints from Panthers fans. Maybe a couple calls have gone towards the Oilers. But overall, I think it's been good. And I know I'm biased, but I think that if you're watching these games, you know that the guys are letting –
the refs are letting the guys decide who's going to get this thing done. So it should be no different tomorrow night, a blatant penalty, call it, but little ticky tack stuff. You got to let that stuff go on both sides. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, wit have fun. Hopefully the Oilers bring it home and have fun in Vegas. And thanks as always. We love having you on. All right, guys. Hey, big cat, you're going to a beer Olympics. We got kicked out.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Real shame. Real shame that we got kicked out. Are you going? What a bummer. Such a bummer. I really wanted to go and spend a full day in Nashville and drink, get my ass kicked by a bunch of offensive linemen and beer drinking.
PFT, what happened with the hair and the leaf blower? Yeah, it was a tough little incident there. All-time moment. All-time moment. So we were trying to get... You looked a little scared in that video. You were wrecked, I guess. I was hammered. So I was only competing for like, I feel like it was 30, 40 minutes. So I only drank, I think, seven or eight beers during those 40 minutes. But I was drinking afterwards because you don't have anything to do except watch other people drink. So you're going to sit down and have some beers.
After it was over, we tried to get Dana Beers into a balloon by filling it up with hot air with a leaf blower, as one does. And it wasn't really cooperating, so I was bent over trying to lift this fucking balloon up. And he's a girthy man. He's got legs.
And so I was trying to lift this thing up. We've got the leaf blower in there on full speed, and my hair gets sucked into the intake of it, and I just feel it jerk my head. And then because everyone's yelling and having a great time, no one can hear me saying, stop, stop, stop the fucking leaf blower. No, this is serious. Yeah, no, it was serious. So it was in there for... I don't even know how long it was in. It felt like it was 20 seconds, probably not that long when it was actually turned on. But then I...
I just have to get down on a knee, and we're holding the leaf blower there so it doesn't pull out any more of my hair. And I'm looking at Zach from The Bachelor, and he's looking at me, and I can see the fear in his eyes. The actual Bachelor. Yeah, I can see the fear in his eyes, and I know that it's bad because he's like...
He takes good care of himself. And so when he's looking at hair that's caught somewhere, you can tell when he's scared. And then I feel Big Cat coming up behind me. And I was just like, don't let the most drunk person here do anything irreversible to my hair. And Zach looks at me. He's like, it's going to be okay. This is all that we have to do. There's only one way to do this. And then Big Cat comes and just...
Snips off. So then I saw some videos later and it looks my hair. I had a great hairline, almost no hair loss whatsoever until they cut that thing out. And now I'm going bald because they cut the hair thing out. So Big Cat made me bald. It was never going to happen. I tried to get the hair out of the thing without the scissors because I was like in my drunken stupor.
I deal with my daughter's hair all the time, like ponytails and that shit. And so like, I've gotten a little bit better at it. So I was like, I got this, like I've done this shit before. I got it. And I started to pull it out and it just was, it was, it was stuck a thousand different ways in that thing. Yeah. There was no way. I was like, it's scissors time. It was the right decision. But in the moment and you're hammered and you're, you don't know what's going to happen. Cause if that thing turns back on, I feel like it's going to rip my scalp off. So yeah, it was a, it was a little scary, but I think we made the right call. Yeah.
Hey, and of course, in summer of tank fashion, he goes bald winning a championship and you go bald via a leaf blower in a case race. You see me not puke? I didn't puke. Yeah, very impressive. I'd be puking everywhere. Most people are kind of pussies and they'd be puking. I did not puke.
You would have puked if you tried actually getting the hair out of that leaf blow. That's why you used the scissors. All right, Whit. Maybe someday case race for you. Never. Come on. Never. Come on. You have to admit it was fun. I'll come announce it. You have to admit it looked like a good time.
It did look fun. We were just beating the fuck out of Brandon. He texted me halfway through. He's like, I think I'm going to quit. We're just beating him up. It was bad, yeah. But Brandon does a good job of being the hapless WWE ref that just gets shit on, and he's just crying the entire time. It was great. All right, man. All right, well, have fun tomorrow night, and we're rooting for the Oilers. All right, guys. Appreciate that. Have a great one.
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For do-it-yourself projects to road trips, off-road adventures, tailgates, whatever your thing is, it all starts with a Chevy truck. Okay, Mount Rushmore season. Boys, so a couple things. If you're new to this podcast, Mount Rushmore season starts right after the NBA Finals, goes till football comes back.
We will do Mount Rushmore's of everything. Anything and everything. So please submit any that you'd like to hear. Maybe best pizza toppings? Best pizza toppings. That would be a good one. We've been doing it for eight years. This is our eighth year. So we've done a lot. I asked for submissions, and a lot of people submitted things we'd already done. We could do some throwbacks, but we still have a bunch that we've never done. I would say that if we do throwbacks...
They should be like 2016 or 2017. Right, right, right. Where we don't even remember it. Also, shout out our guy, Stu Feiner, who doesn't understand how Mount Rushmore season works because I asked for Mount Rushmore submissions and he said...
That's a good start. Most women in a day. I'll start one. Are we talking 24 hours?
Yeah, but it's... I think in one... Yeah, it's one. One. Okay. But yeah, he doesn't really understand it. All right, so what are we going to do for a punishment? So we're going to do solos this year. Hank, Max, PFT, and I are all going to be on our own. What should we do for punishment? I had an idea for... I don't know if this translates well, but we've all got a shitload of numbers in our phones, right? Like, we've accumulated them over the years. Okay. Yeah.
What about cell phone roulette where the loser has to have their phone scrolled through and then randomly they have to make 10 phone calls to people who are on their phone? Friends that they've known from years past. Somebody whose number got put in their phone at like a networking event in 2011. That's dastardly. And you have to try to have a conversation with everybody. Okay. You have to keep doing it until you have 10 minute long conversations. I think you get like- 10 more than a minute. One veto. Okay.
Yeah, you got to have a veto. You got to have a veto. Yeah. Yeah. You got to have a veto. You get one veto. I like that. But, like, my skin's crawling just thinking about it. What about... So, if they don't pick up? I'm going to lose this fucking thing. No, you're not. Just pick... Don't pick Jerome Bettis. I'm the least... What...
If they don't pick up, does it count as a call? Because I think you can't get 10 calls. Like, I mean, you can't get 10. If we have to make it 10 answers, that could take forever. 10 minute long conversations. But I think it should be, you have to do 10 calls. You have to have at least five answers or something. Well, because the punishment we did last year was the 24 hour stream, right? Yeah. Yeah. So that took a long time. Yeah. Yeah.
I just think... Yeah, I mean, that... We could do it. 24-hour stream is better for the fans. We also don't need to do a finalized one today. We don't, but we also could do that. We could do that idea, and we could make it... We could edit it so that we get 10 calls and put it on the podcast. Yes. Because that would be interesting. Because, like, if you have... If you have to call 20 people where they don't pick up, we could just edit out the people who don't pick up and put it on the podcast. I like that. One veto. Mm-hmm. But...
People could also potentially go through their phones ahead of time and take, if it looks like you're going to lose and take out some real hot button names. I don't really have hot button names. I just have, I think there's just a shitload of people I don't want to call. Yeah. Yeah.
I don't want to talk to anybody on the phone. And I don't really know who I don't want to call until their number came up. Yeah. Can you scroll? Because we used to do this in college when we were drunk. We would do it on the old flip phones. We'd do it where you just press down. You can scroll, right? Yeah, you swipe it up. Yeah, you can swipe up. So just scroll at random and then stop. I do think that a lot of people just won't answer.
Like, how many times do you answer a phone call from... Although, no. They might have your number, too. Because you do know them. They'll be like, why is this person calling me? Yeah. And they'll be like, hey. Yeah, right. I would just play it off like, oh, it must be that software thing where we both called each other. Crazy. Well, you can't do... I think you have to, like, try and make a conversation. Oh, man. This is good. It could be bad. All right. I'm doing a random swipe. I also don't think that we should... I'm doing a random swipe. I'm going to come in last. Wait. You're doing it? Yeah. I'm doing a random swipe. It's going to be completely random. Okay.
I just wanted to hang up on him so bad. I knew it was either Darren or Marlins man. No, uh, no, it was not. It was not Marlins man. It was not Marlins man. Marlins man. You'll see when we do the intern interviews, Marlins man invited me to some things. And then I was like, I'm going to be in Vegas. And then he sent me his top three strip clubs. Uh, okay. Uh,
Who wants to go first? We got to do some sort of random drawing for this. I like this punishment, though. I think it's phone roulette at the end of the summer. Well, let's also see if you have some good ideas. You know it's a good punishment when Max can't talk. Yeah, when he hates it. He can't talk anymore. We'll see some ideas. How about you just win? I'm not going to win. I know I'm going to lose.
Maybe you're the only other person who could lose. It's you or me. No, these are going to be anonymous polls. It doesn't matter. We've split up the SPOC. We could also make it more fun this summer and have it be the same PFT's idea, but it could be last place has to do four, second to last place has to do three, second place has to do two, winner has to do one. Yeah. Winners have to do none. Yeah, winners should do none. But it would be fun.
What's the point of winning? What's the pressure? Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. Like, there wouldn't be... The severity of the loss wouldn't hurt so bad. The severity of the loss should be bad. Okay. It should be... I think it should be two, four, six, eight. You should feel the pressure. Okay. All right. All right. So then we'll just keep it to ten. But if anyone has a good idea for a punishment, let us know. Let us know. We're open to everything. Let us know. Okay. Get a perm. Who wants...
I thought we were going to do a positive Mount Rushmore season. That was on me. I was slamming myself. I know, but Hank is going to get mad. I'm not mad. I have the perm scheduled. All right. Should we do closest to the number or something? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Guess. 40. 8. 80. 65. I like my chances. Yeah. No, you have the best number. I don't know. 8. 88. Let's go. 88. Max, what would you like the order to be?
I'm going to go second. I'm going to go second. Of course you are. Let's keep it in a circle. So either PFT goes first or Hank goes first because it's going to rotate for the whole summer, and this is how we always sit. So to not fuck it up. Yeah. You know what I mean? I'll let Hank go first. All right. So I'm going fourth. So then the next one I'll go first. Yes. Yes. Okay. All right.
I'm happy I got the first pick. I feel like it's an easy overall 1-1. Cristiano Ronaldo. Ooh. Okay, interesting. He has won some trophies. But the World Cup is the big one. It is the big one. I like that. The World Cup is the biggest trophy in sports, biggest event in sports. I like that a lot. It's never won. I like that. Messi has. Correct. Yes. Facts. It's actually a small trophy. I like that a lot. It's going to get people pissed.
I know. Pissed. It's crazy, too, considering how good Brazil has been over these years, and he still hasn't managed to find a way to win one of them. That's true. Okay, Max. Big second pick. I'm going to go Jim Kelly. Oh. It seems mean, but yeah.
Okay. Yeah, he can't win the big one. Okay. I can't believe this fell to me. Yeah. Dan Marino. Yeah, that was going to be my pick. Dan Marino should be one. I was going between Jim Kelly and Dan Marino, but Jim Kelly lost four big ones in a row. That's true. That's the definition of not winning the big one. He can't win the big one. You're right. Four big ones. He can't win the big one. Dan Marino couldn't even barely make the big one.
He made one of the big ones. But not as many as... Yeah. Yeah, but he was really, really good. Can't win the big one. Yeah, but yeah. I mean, Jim Kelly was there four times. I was between Jim Kelly and Dan Marino.
But just being there four times, I feel like, is the definition of can't win it. That's an all-time clip from Fox on CBS. I think it was Boomer Sison said, like, if he doesn't get his act together, talking about Peyton Manning, Peyton Manning doesn't win one, then he'll just always be known as, like, a Dan Marino-type guy that can't win the big one. And then Dan Marino's sitting right next to him, and he's like, what? Why did you say that? Yeah. Okay. I was going to go Dan Marino. Jim Kelly's a good pick. I'll go with...
As much as it hurts me to say Charles Barkley, it doesn't really hurt me, but couldn't win the big one. Charles Barkley. Couldn't win the big one. Uh,
Max since he's become the producer of PMT. Yeah. That's my second pick. I had Max. Charles Barkley and then Max since he's become the producer. I mean, he literally, you want to talk about Jim Kelly, he can't win the big one. Yeah, can't do it. Can't win the big one. That's a good pick. Thank you. I thought he would be on the board later. Yeah, the fourth pick is tough because it's going to be a long time until he gets back to me. But I feel good about my picks. All right. So I'm up again? Yes. Snake draft. Yes. All right. Second pick is going to be Chris Paul. Yes.
Chris Paul can't win the big one. Just can't do it. He's never going to win the big one. Never going to win the big one. Absolutely not. Is anyone going to do Connor McDavid? I think they're going to win. Okay. But as of right now, he can't win the big one. You're kind of saying that he has won the big one already. Yeah, you're calling it over.
Well, yeah, by the time people... Some people might listen to this podcast Tuesday and you sound like a fool. Okay. Is there going to be a, like, Huck Tuesday? Yeah. All right, Max, you're up. I'm going to go James Harden. Oh, good pick. Good pick. Good pick. How much of that was James and how much of it was the city of Philadelphia? Well, he's done it everywhere. 166 career playoff games. Whoa. That's a lot. Can't win the big one. Okay. I will go with...
I don't know if I want to stay with two sports here. Barry Bonds. Okay. I had him on my list, but it's always tough with baseball. But yes, he could not win the greatest. Yeah, the greatest. No, he couldn't win the big one. You're right. Oh, shit. Yeah, you don't get that discourse as much with baseball. A-Rod had it for a while. He did. Yeah. You never get it with Mike Trout. No. Well, he's got to make the playoffs. We'll do another one. Can't make the playoffs. The wild card is his big one. Okay.
Joel Embiid. Oh, good pick. Yeah, good pick. Very good pick. He can't even win the one before the big one. Mm-hmm.
Any playoff game is a big one. But the second round is his big one, and he hasn't been able to win that. He had to go ring chasing to sign up for Team USA. Yeah. That's how desperate he is to win a big one. Yeah. What do you think about that pick, Max? I'm happy that it was picked before me. Okay. Because you were going to take him? No, I was not going to take him, but I'm happy. Okay. Because that's a bad pick, and somebody else has it. I'm going to go with Randy Moss. Ooh.
Now we're fighting here. That was on my list, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. Yeah, I had it on the list, too. Yeah, couldn't win the big one. Good pick. Okay. I'm going to go Kyle Shanahan. Ah, good one. Recent addition to the list. Good one. But it's a bubbling narrative. Friend of the show. Sorry, Kyle. Yeah, no, he can't win the big one. But, I mean, he's just had a couple big ones that he should have won. Can't win the big one. And he didn't. Um...
I'm going to do a pick that will probably get me last place, but I don't care because if we're trying to get the most interaction, which I think we all agree. Oh, no. What? Go ahead.
Caitlin Clark can't win the big one. She can't win the big one. She has not been able to win the big one. That's a good pick. That's a good pick. Had her on my list. That's going to be a good one. That might be a winner. That might be a winner. They're going to get so bad. She cannot win the big one. Fact or fiction. She lost. Angel Reese can win the big one. Yeah, she's a better winner. Okay. I have one more pick.
Karl Malone could never win the big one. I mean, he literally couldn't win the big one with the Jazz, went to the Lakers trying to win the big one. Chased the big one. And lost. I know he got hurt that year, but lost to the Pistons, so can't win the big one. Usually he chases little ones, not big ones, but he did that when he went away. All right, last pick. That would have been funny if it was like when...
When Kendrick was doing his pop-up show, if it had been like 20 years ago, and he had all the Lakers out. What's interesting, you said Kendrick right there, Big Cat. Oh. Because my pick was going to be Drake. Oh. Can't win the big one. He lost the big one. He did lose the big one. He lost it on the biggest day. He's lost a couple big ones. Has he not? He keeps losing the big ones. Yeah. He won against Meek, though. Oh. Yeah, but he's from Philly, so. Was that a big one? Yeah, that doesn't count. Yeah.
Okay, Max. Yeah, Drake. Good pick. I'm going to go. All right, now I'm going to go Henry Klumquist. Oh, good one. The king without a ring. That's a great pick, Max. That's a great pick. All right, Hank, finish this off. Then we got a bunch of honorable mentions. There's some good ones still left out there.
Go Barry Sanders. Oh, yeah. I feel bad. He wasn't in contention to win. Yeah, he was never close. That was one that I thought about. Yeah. Kalen Clark was going to be my home run anchor pick. Yeah. Yeah. I took her. She can't win the ball. I didn't want to do more baseball. All right. What else we got? I have Ken Griffey Jr. Mm-hmm. Yep. Baseball's tough, though. You're right. I didn't want to do baseball because it's...
It's so much harder to be like one guy who couldn't win it. Basketball and football, it's like on you. Ty Cobb. Ty Cobb couldn't win the big one. We can't do teams, but US Men's National Team can't win the big one. Can't win the big one. They literally cannot win the big one. We could do the state of Minnesota. Yeah. I had the Bills as a whole. Jim Kelly's good, though. Elgin Baylor. Eight finals appearances, lost every one. That's tough. Mark Few.
Yep. Can't win the big one. Yep. Cannot win the big one. Can't even make a final four. Yep. I had Peyton Manning on my list because I still feel like we should say Peyton can't win the big one. Do you know what I have on my list that you could make the argument has won a big one, but you could also make the argument has not? Who? Kevin Durant. Yeah. He can't win the big one. It wasn't the big one. He can't win the big one. Not on his own. Steph won those big ones.
I had Gordon Bombay, the player. Yep. Choke artist. That's a good one. Dak. Dak can't win the big one. OJ. OJ couldn't win the big one. Well, his case was pretty big. That's the biggest one. That was the biggest one. His one is freedom. Yeah.
Greg Norman. He's 2-0 in knife fights. Yeah. Greg Norman, Tony Finau. Yeah. Unfortunately, I love Tony Finau. Greg Norman's a good one, yeah. Allen Iverson. Yeah. Can't win the big one. He had the worst team of all time around him. Okay. Reggie Miller. Reggie Miller couldn't win the big one. Big time couldn't win the big one. Germany. Patrick Ewing. Patrick Ewing couldn't win the big one. Me and Super Bowl futures. Can't win the big one. Mm-hmm.
Hilary Swank from Million Dollar Baby. Did she lose? I think she lost. Oh. She got paralyzed, right? I don't know. I never saw that movie. Yeah. That's too bad. England. England couldn't win the big one. Just in lots of stuff. In a lot of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Who's the... Is there an actor who hasn't been able to win the big one? It was Leo for a while. Yeah. But then he won the big one? It was Scorsese too, right? For Best Picture. Yeah.
Because I don't think Goodfellas won Best Picture. He got hosed on that one, but then I think The Departed finally, that got him over the hump. Bob Odenkirk. He's not been able to win the big one? He gets robbed every year. Shit. I think. Damn.
Some of the best can't win the big ones. Yeah, Peyton Manning was one of the best can't win the big one debates. Yeah, I'll never be able to forgive him for winning a Super Bowl, for taking that away from us. Phil was a great can't win the big one. Sergio. Yep. Those rocked. Just can't win the big one. Connor McDavid, if he doesn't win tonight. Yeah, he's definitely on that list. Hard in the can't win the big one. Yeah, Kaitlin Clark is definitely already on that list. Yeah, for sure. She literally cannot win the big one.
And like, I don't know what else you could say about it. That's going to get people real mad. You could make the argument. Taylor Swift hasn't won the big one because no one's proposed to her. That's the ultimate one. No rings. We're talking about rings. Can I amend my last pick and make it Taylor Swift? All right. Anything else? It's a good show, boys. Good show. Good to be back in the studio with the boys.
We've got a great show on Wednesday. Such a shame. Such a shame that whatever the fuck. What do they call it now? Beer games? Yeah, the beer games. The beer games. After the case race. We're going to do a two-minute case race recap. I think I'm not drinking beer ever again. People were wondering. I was so out of it.
I don't ever want to drink. Like when Missoula invited me, I told you after, I was like, none of that really processed in my mind because I was just definitely hungover. Yeah. If you haven't watched it, PFT and Hank joined us for the yacht case race on Friday. It was a Royal rumble case race. We were all dressed as wrestlers. I had to cut PFT's hair out of a leaf blower.
It was Hank. You started the first fight, Hank. I was so violently hungover. It reminded me why I'm washed as a human being. Yeah, we had to come into work at 9 a.m. the next day, and it was interesting. It was very, very tough for me. Brains were dead. Yeah, but that was one of those moments. I woke up on Thursday, and I was like, if you had told me we had done that case race and then we had to be in Vegas for the Beer Olympics, I would have...
I would have probably quit. No, I quit drinking. I'm never drinking beer again. No, I didn't at the Sphere. Yeah. I didn't. I was like, I'm not drinking. Me neither. I'm doing drugs, but I'm not drinking. Yeah. California sober. Way better way to go. Mincy sober. Yeah. I finger fucked Stephen Shea's face. Yeah, you did. Found his G spot. Yep. Squirted. Yep. The clip Stephen Shea was in the bathroom puking, and someone was filming him from in the bathroom, and he's literally going...
crying about how bad he felt. And then he must have been on his phone. He goes, Kelsey Plum only has three rebounds? Yeah.
And then he had another clip where he was crumpled in the bathroom. That was like an hour later. And he stood up and he just started telling himself, he's like, I'm Neo. I'm in the Matrix. And then came out and just looked so bad. It was just so chaotic. It's crazy. I mean, we have people that can drink a lot of beer. I'm not one of them. So we had guys drinking 15 beers being like, come on, keep drinking. I was like, I drank nine beers in an hour. I'm done. If I keep drinking, I'm going to puke. Yeah. And I did. I didn't. Thank God.
Held it in. Shane, I might have said something about you earlier, just so you know. You want to put the headphones on? Shane is our great behind-the-scenes guy who we've, I don't know why it started, but we've just started, well, he's a weird guy, but we've also started just making up stuff about him. Well, no, it's not made up. It's real. You haven't had a sandwich until last week, right? I might have said that the Hawk Tua girl. Oh, I heard it. Oh, you did. Oh, yeah. But you agree you do Hawk Tua your own dick. Yeah.
That's a yes. That's a yes. That was a yes. That's weird, dude. That's fucking weird. The old self-suck? No, he's not even sucking. He's just spitting on his own dick and then jerking off. Yeah. It's crazy. He's looming himself off. Okay, numbers. 8. 20. 3. 44. 56. 99, Pug. 21. 19. 19. Love you guys. I don't know what.
I'm not saying it's bad or good.
Take me away.
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