One Ring To Rule Them All
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Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Want to talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com slash call Conan. Okay, let's get started.

Hi, Raheel. Welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan. Hey, everybody. Hey, Raheel. How are you? I'm doing amazing. So excited to meet you guys. Yeah. How are you? First of all, where are you contacting us from? So I'm down in Miami. Oh, okay. Other side of the U.S., yeah. Very nice. And tell us a little bit about yourself, Raheel. Yeah. So I'm a...

I'm currently in my fellowship. So I finished med school and I did my training. I'm still currently in my training and I'm doing gastroenterology and hepatology. Oh, good Lord. That's impressive. You're a gastroenterologist. And what was the other field too? And hepatology. So they go kind of hand in hand. Hepatology is blood? Liver. Liver.

Sorry. So liver connected to intestine. Yes. Intestinal tract. That all makes sense. Okay. Yeah. We'll clean that up. What do you want me to do? What? Who's the doctor?

Who's going to clean it up? Girls? He's going to edit it? Yeah, just so I know what hepatology is. Anyway, so you'll do as you're told. Okay, I'm sorry, Raheel. We can just reconfigure it so that hepatology is actually blood.

I'm doing great. It's great to meet you guys. Now, I've always heard hepatology is the study of the liver. Is that correct? Yeah. I actually learned that from your podcast earlier. Thank you. I never make mistakes when it comes to medicine because I, too, am well-trained. Well, first of all, congratulations. You're a young man, and it seems like you're very well-educated, and that's very cool, and you're going to help a lot of people. Tell us a little bit about...

your training? What are you interested? Well, first of all, have you worked with a lot of patients so far? Has it all been textbook stuff? Yeah, no. So I've done. So, you know, our med school is four years after our undergrad. And then we do three years of internal medicine, which is all, you know, patient facing hospital based long days, long hours. And then,

GI hepatology is another three years after that. So I'm about halfway through right now. So it's been about four and a half, five years of seeing patients. It's such a dedication it takes in the field of medicine. There is no preparation required.

For being in comedy. There's no... I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed that you just get to dive in and be an ass and whatever, start getting to practice immediately. I'm so impressed by the fact that you've had... You've spent years and years and years of your life preparing. And I'm glad you have because I'm sure you're going to be very good at what you do. You're going to help save a lot of lives. That's the hope. I mean, you know, even this many years in it, every day it feels like I'm...

Still trying to figure out what's going on with everybody. So it's one of those things where learning never stops. You kind of keep going at it. New things, new experiences, new patient interactions. It all makes it worth it. Okay. I've talked about this a lot, but can you hook me up with propofol? Oh, geez. Oh, geez. Come on. Because I've, you know, when I've had colonoscopies, they give me this drug propofol and I've talked about it before, but it's the happiest I've been in my entire life. It's an absolutely amazing feeling.

and it's miraculous. And so if you could become my secret illegal supplier of propofol, I don't see how anyone traces it back to us. I don't see one way that it leaks out and it's tracked back to us. That's just what I'm saying. By the way, I'm terrible at committing crimes.

Have you performed any colonoscopies? Is that something that they've trained you to do? Yeah, yeah. So we kind of get into it from day one from our training. So, you know, our first year we're

fumbling around trying to figure out what we're doing it's it's a new technical skill and it's you know not necessarily intuitive when you get started um and then you know over the first year you really get your confidence and then second year you really start to build your skill build your efficiency um can i just say i hate to interrupt but for heel doesn't that kind of suck for the

patient. If you're saying like, yeah, you know, first year, you're just jamming a camera in there. You don't know what you're doing. It's banging up against stuff and you just have to kind of force it. Isn't that, I mean, you don't want to be, I don't want to encounter you at that stage, Raheel, as a patient. Is that fair to say? You do with propofol. It's

It's that magic stuff that you're right. OK, so I wake up and I don't know what's happened. Exactly. You ask after they wake up, they ask, are we getting started? And that's the magic of Provo Fall. Even though you've been banging around in there for three hours, banging around. Come on. Do you think you're pretty good at it now? I would like to think so. You know, my attendings might say otherwise behind closed doors, but at least to my face, I say I'm doing well. Good, good.

I would think when is the I would think the technology is going to improve to the point where you just swallow like a little pill or something and it works its way through your system really quickly. And the pill comes out the other side and said, everything is fine.

They have one. Do they? They have one of those for the small bowel, for like the small intestine. But the colon is just so wide and distended. It can't really take pictures of the whole thing. And thankfully, I hope it doesn't because then I'll be out of a job. See, that's the problem is technology replaces a lot of I mean, I'll be replaced by AI in about a year. Yeah. We'll have a fake cone in here. Less than a year.

Okay. That's good to know. Just let me give you a heads up. Ratings might go up. All right. That's nice. That's nice. Let's turn up the, let's turn up the knob on the comedy portion of the Conan. Hey, it's working. Um,

Well, I think that's I think that's fantastic. Now, what about you? What is it? Does looking at people's intestines? Has it in? Is it at all adjusted or informed the way that you eat or the way that you treat your body when you look at other people's intestines? No. And it's like it's always a running joke whenever you see GI fellows eating.

You can always tell who they are in the hospital because they're literally just running to the cafeteria, stuffing whatever food they can in their mouth between procedures and then running back to the procedure room. The field and the practice is just so fast-paced, and we're just running to see patients, running to do procedures. I literally, when I tell patients and counsel them in clinic, I just basically say everything I don't do in my life. Oh, my God. That's fascinating to me. So you're telling them, well, it's really good to...

you know, eat a lot of roughage and don't eat processed foods. And it's really good to avoid the, and then you don't listen to it at all. I'll be stuffing a pizza in my mouth as I'm telling them that. Yeah.

Okay. All right. Are you pretty healthy? Are you a healthy eater other than when you're at work? When you're not, let's say you're not at work. Are you fairly healthy about your diet? I'd like, I try to be. I'm vegetarian, you know, as, as just religiously. So that kind of lends itself to eating more like, you know, lentils and vegetables and getting your, your greens in. Right. Yeah. I'm not a big lentil guy. I'm going to tell you right now. You know what? I don't like them either. I

I mean, I don't think I've ever said, hey, I need me some lentils. Yeah. You know, or when I'm in a restaurant, I don't it's not the first thing I ask the waiter. Hey, you got lentils? No. What's the lentil situation? Let's run down the list of the lentils. What's the lentil of the day? Exactly. I want to see the lentil sommelier come out and taste the lentil. So do you fast ever?

I do. Because that's a big thing now. People believe that fasting and I would like your opinion on this because I know people that fast and they say it's good for them. And now there's a lot of science that's saying fasting is good. But I always wonder, is it one of those things where 10 years from now they're going to tell us, actually, it's terrible for you. We changed our minds. You know, I think.

Well, so I think the and this is just what I've seen off of Instagram, probably, but. Oh, good. You're a doctor, are you not? Hi, doctor. Can you tell us what you're seeing on Instagram? Can I have some of that pizza? Hello, doctor. Tell me what's on TikTok. Go ahead. Sorry. Go ahead. Go ahead. No, I was going to say, I feel like I've seen some people or some some some some other experts kind of.

saying that the data around intermittent fasting isn't all that it was cracked up to be earlier. Um, so, you know, but you know, as far as fasting, um, I do not necessarily for the health benefits, but I did, uh, just in terms of religion. Oh, okay. What is, uh, can you, can you tell me specifically, uh, what your religion is?

Yeah. So my religion is called Jainism. Um, so practitioners are called Jain. Um, and so we have kind of, you know, there's similar things in other cultures. There's like Ramadan for, for people who follow Islam, there's like Lent and things like that. But in Jainism, we have this eight day, eight or 10 day religious festival called Baryushin. And during that time we can do different days of fasting. You know, some people will do just the last day. Um, and then

you know, kind of as much as you can. So I've done eight day fasts, basically no food. Eight day fast. Yeah. I mean, that's for eight days. No food of any kind. Or can you take some sustenance? Just boiled water when there's daylight out. And this kind of stretches back, you know, to the start of the religion and the different like, um,

pre-technology ages and stuff like that. But, but yeah, just water for eight days. Uh, okay. I have questions. Uh, as a, as a doctor, do you think that that's okay to go eight days without any food other than water? I don't, uh, this was all pre med school. Like this was like me in undergrad, me in med school. Um,

I don't think it's the healthiest. I don't think it's the healthiest thing to do. Right. I do think it's a really interesting test of determination, interesting test of self-will. And you can really push your body to the limit in a, in a,

way that, you know, outside of thinking medical, but you can really see what your body is capable of in those eight days. Are you even able to get out of bed on the eighth day? Are you debilitated? Yeah, no, you can live life as is. You know, one, the first time I did it, I was an undergrad. The second time I was in med school and you live life as is, you know, the first couple of days are the hardest where you're

you know, I feel like if it's 11 o'clock and I'm like, it's lunchtime, your body's just so used to it. And then after like day one, day two, your body kind of adjusts to that feeling of I'm not eating. And so let me occupy myself with other stuff. And then

The rest of the week, honestly, just kind of, you just don't feel that sensation of hunger as much. You know why? That's because your body is eating itself. On day seven, hey, I don't feel so bad. Yeah, you just ate your heart. Your body's like, I'm good. Yeah, liver's gone, heart's gone. Now I'm working on the third rib. ♪♪

There's this great new thing I've heard about where you take a trip, you go someplace, okay? And you Airbnb your apartment, your house, your pad while you're gone. Yeah. And that way you make some money or as I call it, some scratch.

And you just have people staying at your house. And it's completely cool. Blay, have you done this? Yeah. And you know what's interesting is my sister recently moved back to Michigan. So I've been traveling there a lot. And so with Airbnb, I can host people at my apartment while I'm gone back in Michigan to make a little extra, as you say, scratch. I mean, it completely makes sense. Why should your apartment or your home sit

empty. Exactly. Now, do you have to spruce it up a little bit, make it nice? Well, your place is pretty nice anyway. It's pretty nice, but I do have a lot of comic books and a lot of, you know, like horror movie paraphernalia. So, you know, it's a bit Batcave-ish in terms of if Bruce Wayne was a virgin. Well, you're never fully developed as a human being, so I just think what you want to do is put all that stuff in a cabinet play. So they think they're getting an Airbnb from a fully developed adult, you know what I'm saying? Right.

I don't think it's all going to fit in one cabinet, but I can certainly try. Just whatever. I know your place is nice. It's a nice place. Come on. I will host you. It's a nice place. You have a dinosaur egg. I have a real brontosaurus egg. That's true. Yeah. And seven life-sized Iron Men.

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I hate when someone uses almond butter and then they close the top. Do you know what I mean? But they leave some of the almond butter dribbling down the side of the eye. Don't you hate that? I actually do. That is something I agree with you on. And then it hardens like a cement. To me, that person is a villain. No.

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Pretty chilly out there at winter time. Yeah, it is. You know what I like about winter time? I'm gonna tell you anyway. I like sitting around with my pals, my good buddies, my posse, and I like cracking open a cold one, you know? Whether it's a holiday gathering, office parties, or a fireside conversation, football Sundays. Oh, I love football Sundays with the gang. Sure do, you're such a jock. I am a jock. The old jockaroo they used to call me.

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Let me list them for you. Oh. Malted barley for rich, balanced toffee note flavors and the iconic golden color, you know? And I like that it's 96 calories. And I actually wanted to know how many carbs it was. So I did this myself in a lab. Oh. It's 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah. How did you do that? It's very complicated. I can't describe it all to you now, Sonia. You'd never understand. Okay. But it involves. All right.

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Well, it's hard for you to be near a TV because you're just a man of the world. You're always wandering around. You're like Johnny Appleseed. Wow, that's really nice. Thank you. Yeah, except he did a positive thing by planting apple trees. I don't know what you're doing. Anyway, you're just looking at your FanDuel screen. Anyway, visit FanDuel.com slash Conan to join today. You'll get started with $150 in bonus bets if you win your first $5 bet. That's FanDuel.com slash Conan. Never waste a hunch. Make every moment more with FanDuel, an official sportsbook partner of the NFL.

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I mean, it's all it's all it's fascinating to me because clearly there is a large religious component in many religions. There's a big religious component to denying yourself food, fasting, going without and people feeling like they reach a higher plane or that they feel that they've gained something by sinning.

seeing what they could do by denying themselves so there's clearly some kind of link here it's just we don't know obviously what this completely what the science is and maybe it's different for all kinds of people i don't know yeah no i mean i just going through the experience it really showed like what the body is capable of um was it the health did something i doubt it

But it was an experience. And how do you break after eight days? Yeah, what do you do? Is it do you do you get a, you know, like a nine tiered hamburger? What do you get? I mean, I know you're a vegetarian. I'm just thinking about what I would do. I would I would try to go to In-N-Out and say, can you make a hamburger that has nine patties? They can't. That's structurally sound. Shuffle like a deck of cards. Yeah, I want a card dealer in here. A really good one to shuffle the patties.

and make a nine-tiered sandwich, and then I want my jaw unlocked.

So I can eat it in one bite. What is your, what do you, when you would break fast, what would you eat? So you actually have to go very slow because you basically have to re-wake your bowel. And you're not going to like this, but it's not even lentils, but it's like lentil water. So like the water that you cook your lentils in. I'm a big fan of lentil water. Don't get me wrong.

I am a foe of the lentil. That is my lifelong foe is the lentil, but lentil water and I are best chums.

Yeah, it's just that and like sugar water. And you just try to wake your, you know, wake your GI system back up and then you slowly, slowly advance diet. Right, right. Do you have a question for Conan, Rahil? I do. And it's like a, you know, a life dilemma that I'd love to get some insight of yours. So I am planning on proposing to my girlfriend soon.

And so, you know, I'm about to start the whole ring shopping thing. And her parents happen to be jewelers. And so I'd like to know how you would kind of navigate the clear conflict of interest when I have no negotiating power on my side. OK, it's your question is you don't want to purchase the ring from the parents. Is that it? I do. But how would I get the.

best deal or negotiate my way when I have no power on my side. Can you tackle with your future in-laws? Are you assuming they're not going to give you the best deal that they might be trying to make a profit off of? Do you get along with your girlfriend's parents? No, I do. I do. They're lovely. They're lovely. Okay, so my guess is they're going to give you a good deal. But that's the assumption that, you know, that's what...

He can't go anywhere else. He can't go to another jeweler. So they're just going to be like, well, he's going to pay whatever we tell him to pay. I would pay like three times the price. I don't know these people. I don't know who they are. You tell me they're nice people. I'm questioning whether you have to buy the ring from them. You have to. Well, you could say, Raheel, that it's important for you that the ring you give...

Your future wife have passed through your body. Oh, that's not what I thought. I said, I just want to be an independent man. No, no. And you it's important to you that a you buy the ring and then it passed through your GI tract. OK, in order because that's such an important part of your life. And they're not going to want to sell it. They're not going to want to sell you one of their rings once they hear that.

I think it's a symbol of your you. It's a symbol of what you do, your profession, what you're giving your life to. But also you are willing to process this ring in every way that a human can process something. And and then they're going to not want to sell you a ring at that point. No, because there's a good chance it'll get stuck in there like a sunflower seed. It's not.

What? Raheel, you'll buy a ring that will pass easily through the lower bowel, will you not? Yeah. At my current fellow salary, I don't think I can afford anything that's going to get stuck. Yeah.

Yeah. And you can also encase it in a prune or something that's going to go through pretty quick. Don't eat the ring. Don't eat the ring. Oh, you're telling me that what I'm telling him is stupid? How is it stupid that he buy a ring, stick it in a prune, eat it, pass it through his body, clean it off and give it to his wife and bypass his, her parents who are jewelers? I don't see one problem with that plan. Raheel, what do you think? I could get behind most of it. Yeah.

Well, listen, in all seriousness, I think you buy the ring from them. Are they going to be able to keep their mouths shut? Because you do want it to be a surprise when you give her the ring. I know. And so I don't know if I can tell her whenever this podcast comes out if she can listen to it or if I just have to say.

You're talking about it. She's an intelligent woman. I'm assuming she's not listening. So I think you're okay. Do you think her parents are going to have a lot of input on what the ring is? Or do you get to choose that freely? We've kind of talked about it. And they've told me what her preferences are. Ah.

Oh, for God's sake. She already knows. What would she want? I don't know. I think they can keep a secret. So I'm hoping. But do they know what she wants? Because you keep talking about what, you know, Eduardo brings up a good point, which is they know what their preferences are. But what's her preference? No, they've said, you know, they're a family of jewelers.

a couple of generations. So jewelry is very ingrained. I think they've always talked about that kind of stuff, like over the dinner table, probably. And so they definitely know her preferences. And I think they definitely guide me the right way. They're sweet people. And this is obviously said, you know, with a touch of jest, but. Yeah. Well, I think, I mean, it's all going to go swimmingly. I just want to make sure that it's a nice surprise. You know, that when you pull that ring out,

of yourself. Oh my God. That it's a surprise. This is now part of the proposal? He's pulling it out of his body? If he times it right, how is that even working? If he times it right, he could say, honey, get over here. Oh,

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Your parents helped me pick it out. Your parents picked it out a week ago. And then I ate it with a lot of corn. Now listen. I'm sorry. Reheal. Come on. Come on. Wrap, wrap, wrap. Wrap, wrap, wrap. Reheal.

I'm looking right now at a transcript of this entire conversation, and I see that I've made no missteps whatsoever. Everything I've said is rational and should be done. So congratulations. No, Raheel, you are a impressive young man. I think you're going to have a great career.

I wish you the best with this proposal. I think it's all going to go swimmingly. And I hope I bump into you in person someday because I like you. You're a fine fellow. Think really seriously about swallowing the ring. Just think about it. It's a good idea. Thank you guys so much. It's so great meeting you guys. All right. Take care, man. See you later. See you.

Take it away, Jimmy.

Supervising Producer, Aaron Blair. Associate Talent Producer, Jennifer Samples. Associate Producers, Sean Doherty and Lisa Byrne. Engineering by Eduardo Perez. Get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at SiriusXM.com slash Conan. Please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan wherever fine podcasts are done.

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