Giggling about our reunion outfits, couples therapy, and Bennifer
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Welcome, friends, to the Playful Scratch from the California Lottery. We've got a special guest today, the Scratcher's Scratch Master himself, Juan. Juan, you've mastered 713 playful ways to scratch. Impressive. How'd you do it? Well, I began with a coin, then tried a guitar pick. I even used a cactus once. I can scratch with anything. Even this mic right here.

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What's up my belly laughers, it's giggle time.

Do you want to know something? I don't like the word belly. You know what? I just realized I hate the word belly and I hate that I said it. And I've hated it since I was little. Like whenever kids in middle school or whatever would be like, I have a belly ache. I'd be like, ew, you have a stomach ache. Grow up. Shut up. But also the word stomach, so hard to spell. Like so hard to spell. Wait, people don't talk about it enough. People don't talk about it. That and tongue. I can never spell tongue.

Yeah. And tongue comes up a lot more in text messages than you do. You're a hoe. Because, yeah, a sext is really ruined when you fuck up the word tongue. Dude, nothing ruins a sext more than like a misplaced word. A grammatical error. A grammatical error. You're like, I just killed the entire fucking mood. And then you have to send like the asterisk with the word. You're like...

You're gonna do what with my what? That's not the right word. That's why I got his voice notes. Voice notes all fucking day. Have you done voice notes texting? No, I have not. What? I have not. Yeah, no. It's so much harder when you can hear the voice and you don't have to immediately respond. You can think of what you're gonna say.

You should just send a random one tonight. Yeah, I think I might just go rogue and send a random voice note sext and see what anyone does. Just like do heavy breathing. And then if he's like not into it, be like, oh my God, I'm kidnapped. Yeah.

I was telling you I need help. Oh my god, that must have been like a butt voice note. So sorry. I didn't mean to do that. Anyway, I think we have a lot to get through today. We do. I want to start off with discussing our looks for the reunion. Thank you for everyone who sent me messiness.

Messing is did you just have a stroke? Thank you for everyone who sent me messages to give me a little wellness check, you know, um, we're okay We're okay here. We're learning we're growing. What was your look page and why? Okay, so my look got mixed reviews And for the people who didn't like it dead to me, um

I love how you're not like, that's your opinion. You go, you don't know shit. You don't know shit about anything. You clearly don't understand fashion and someone hurt you in a past life. I will say this. It's very hard to pick out outfits for TV because things look so different on TV than they do in person. Like my dress looked a lot lighter on camera than it was. Like I feel like it was like more pinky in camera. I mean, in real life. Yeah. But I wanted a dress that was...

You know, like a little bit formal, but like classic. And like, I love a big bow or like a big sleeve or like something that's like out there. Well, it's like we're not going to the club. Like we're not trying to be sexy. We're trying to have like kind of a little bit of a moment, but not too much of a moment. It's a hard decision because everyone's judging you too. Like they literally...

I've never felt like Us Weekly Where it's like Who wore it worse And you're just like Oh god I never did beauty pageants As a child But they would've Fucked me up Like I felt like It was like a beauty pageant And I didn't wanna go Like super simple Like I feel like Like

I'm a lot more fat. Like I love fashion a lot more than like other people. Yeah, I could have gone safer. But like then like what do I stand for? I want a conversation piece. What's your purpose in life if you play it safe? Right. If I was just wearing like a plain dress. So where did you get your dress and what was the like inspiration?

My inspiration was... My inspiration originally was Ariana Grande because she's been doing like a very 60s vibe. And I was like, I want something like that. And then I saw this dress on Saks and it was expensive, but I was like...

Let's do it. And then I saw that Ariana wore that exact dress in one of her music videos. And I was like, oh, my God. But I couldn't copy like her full look with like the hair. But I feel like I should have. But whatever. So, yes, it was like Ariana Grande. I got it at Saks. It was Alexia Maria was the thing. And then the shoes, I forget what the name of them were, but it took me years to find them. They're like a it was like a clear pink dress.

And then I just did like diamonds from Nicole Rose Jewelry. I like the shoe that because it has like that cross thing. Cross is very in right now. And I felt like a pump made it too serious. And I didn't really want people to be focusing on the shoes, but I wanted it to be monochromatic. I wanted it to go. Also, you had your curtain bang debut.

I did have my Crimp and Bang debut. I didn't love how they turned out. I feel like my hair could have been better, but it's fine. Okay. It's fine. You live and you learn. Yeah. Hannah, I want to say something about your look. I was on a podcast recently with Darren and I was talking about it and I was like, this

They were like, Hannah looked amazing. And I was like, no, Hannah looked stunning. Like when I saw her in person, I was like, this is the best you've ever looked. And I was like, and I kept complimenting her. And then I started to feel like I was insulting you where I was like, no, you've never looked better. And you're like, okay, so how trash. When I was like, how many times has she told me I look good? And I didn't. And then I was like, is it that good? Or.

Or have I just been a literal swamp monster my whole life? Like, you were acting like I've... I just, like, came out a different person. I'm like, yeah, I brushed my hair today, but, like...

Calm down. No, you looked so good. I just, I loved the color on you. I loved your mom's earrings. I just thought it was great. I have to give kudos to Ari's Closet, ariel.hallersilverstone on Instagram. So she has this vintage shop in Southampton and she just like, she gives me stuff to wear on chat room and stuff and I return it. But this look, it was from Rotate, the

The dress But it was like I love shoulders I love wearing shoulders I do too I feel like it's empowering And the dress was very different But I felt like It was light It was summery And then I went for A lilac eye Which I rarely do

But I loved Thank you It was very summery Thank you And then My mom's vintage earrings Were fun Like you wanted to be you But like a little extra I feel like Yeah oh my god That's so true Like I feel like my dress Was so me Just a little extra It was like we threw up On ourselves Yeah like I'm not wearing that dress again Or like going to a cocktail party Oh

But thank you for the feedback because I've not been allowed to be on Instagram the last two weeks for my mental health. So I didn't even know how people felt about my outfit and people, especially people who don't know me. So having you give me positive feedback about how ugly you thought I was before, it makes me happy. Thank you. Moving on. Speaking of clothes, I have to talk to you about Zara. Okay.

So I went to Zara for the first time in a year. And I went to the Soho location. Oh, a great one. A classic Zara. It was incredible. And I was like, we're going to... I was kind of like pretending I was you. And I was like, what would Paige do? WWPD. The crops are very in. Yeah. But what I'm seeing...

Zara is not doing crops Zara's doing bras What happened to a crop that was up to your belly button Like Paige every single one Is a fucking bra Zara's doing bras I am a size like 6'8 and I feel uncomfortable with that So like what are they doing

Here's how you can like Deal with that You just have to get Like a higher Pant Like your Now your pants Should like go above Your belly button If you're gonna do Like a bra top like that Also Like 60s And like 70s Is really in So like all those Like scarf tops That are like bras Yeah Are really in I know It's like annoying It's kind of like Cause like you're on Birth control now And your boobs Got a little bigger And you were Falling out of your Zara

What? When was I? Do you remember at um when we Oh I checked in the office I was like sorry my boobs are just spilling out on the table Like if you have boobs it's hard to wear those little fucking crops

I get it. I don't get it. But like the day I felt like I had big boobs, I was like, pardon. Did I knock you in the face? Everyone's like, no. They're like hitting your chin. You're like, oh my God, I'm sorry. I'm still an A cup. Let's not get it twisted. But also Zara's doing like no fitting room. So everyone's just like, I know grabbing all the clothes.

Before Zara was doing no fitting rooms, I would notoriously get screamed at in Zara because like I hate fitting rooms. I absolutely hate them. And so I would just throw things on in the store. Like I'd put it on over my clothes because growing up, my mom would just be like, just throw it on. Let's see what it looks like. We're not waiting in this line. And they'd be like, you can't do that. And I'd be like,

What are you guys going to do about it? You don't even want to work here. You don't care. Act like you don't know this, but I'm your top influencer. Yeah. So go fuck yourself. I know you guys don't have influencer relations. I keep you guys alive. I keep a paycheck in your bank account. Throwing on a blazer. Oh, get over it. Get over yourself. The line was fucking insane, but I was able to bond with this guy in front of me. I was like, this is wild, right? And it's just... It was like...

It's overwhelming. Do you know Trader Joe's? How like when you walk in the line so crazy, you just get in line and then shop through the line. Yeah. That's what I did at Zara. Really? It was so bad. Oh, you're saying like the checkout line was so long? The checkout line was so long that I stood there and then shopped as I went. Question, when you're in line at Zara and you've been waiting like 30 minutes and it's very competitive, a lot of attention, people are leaving the line. It's like getting really scary. Very scary. You're sweating. Mm-hmm.

And you see something. Yep. Happens every time. That you need, you need to look at, but it's like, you have to physically get out of line to do it. Yep. Do you have the balls to ask the person to save your spot? A thousand percent? No, you have to.

You have I hate talking on the phone I hate ordering something I hate interacting with humans Yeah It's the only place I don't I have no shame I turn around and I say I have to go look at that I'm going to be right back Yeah Can you save my spot? This is when you have to have Like the trust in New Yorkers

Yeah I saw a quote Like a couple weeks ago And I don't know why I can't get it out of my head Are you about to do An inspirational quote about Zara? Not at all Oh About New York And it was like This is how LA people And New York people Are different LA people Are really nice And they're really nice

but actual monsters. New York people are mean, but kind hearted. Like if you say something, a New Yorker's gonna be like, fuck you. But deep down, like they're a nice person. They're just agitated. - We're all in the weeds in New York. So when you're like, oh, I need to try that on. People are like, we fucking get it. I was trying to do this, like keep my foot in line, but like stretch. Like I did this weird stretch thing where I'm like, I'm in line, I'm in line. And I was like trying to look at everything. And I grabbed one.

But it was like extra small and it didn't fit me. So I waited to get to the checkout. And then while they were going through all my clothes, because I had a ton, I was shopping. Like I was like, oh, I have to put something back. And I was literally going through all the things I saw online that I couldn't pick. Remember when you were little and the anxiety of being at the grocery store and your mom being like, oh, I

I forgot the butter. Stay here. And then you're next and you're just like, oh, and you're putting things on like the moving thing. And then it's time to pay. And you're like, we forgot milk. We're up next. Get the milk. And then suddenly you never saw milk in your life and you don't know what milk is. And you're just like the anxiety of that. Have you ever gotten lost in the supermarket and they had to be like, um, Paige is at the front. Can her mom come pick her up?

No, that's one. But it's always been my worst nightmare. That's some silly shit though. Like no one knows. Like you probably would walk into like your mom's friend who she was ignoring and she's like, okay. Yeah. Love that story. One of my favorite Kim stories. Also speaking of New Yorkers that no one talks about enough is like when you're at a coffee shop with your laptop and like you're eating and your food and someone next to you with their laptop and their food and stuff is like, hey, I have to go to the bathroom. Can you watch this?

What the fuck would you do if someone straight up came and took their laptop? Like, do they want me to fight that person? I've never been asked that. Also, that seems like a hidden camera show. I'd be like,

I, yeah, like, now my best friends with this person that I have to defend them. I've been in airports before. Yeah. Where we're, like, sitting waiting for the gate and someone's like, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Can you watch this? Here's the thing. If it's a girl, if a, like, and you can suss out this girl and she's like, I'm running in the back. I'd be like, yeah, for sure. But, like, if it's a guy, I'm like, I don't,

I'm like okay but if someone comes and takes it I'm not liable but I say okay like I can barely defend myself how am I gonna defend your fucking laptop like if a dude came grabbed his laptop and ran out like am I what if they came back and they're like are you fucking kidding me I told you to watch it I'd be like I don't I didn't sign up for this role I'm just trying to answer an email I would leave I would leave after the person that stole the laptop left I'd be like you know what peace out I don't I can't do it please just do me

Send it for me. Oh, we love New York. New York is back and buzzing. You wrote something in our notes about Dominique.

Oh Okay so my My friend Dominique She came over to my apartment Cause like she hasn't seen My new apartment I haven't seen her in a while We sat on the couch When I tell you We got blacked out drunk Like on a Thursday night We had like three bottles of wine And we laid on the couch And just talked about Our fucking feelings Oh shit All we talked about Were our feelings And there was one thing That she said And I was like I gotta talk about this On the podcast Stop

And I wrote it down. And I even wrote Dominique Convo. And we were talking about like having sex with like guys, whatever. And we were saying how if you're having sex with a guy and he says, like, I want to get you pregnant. Has anyone ever said that to you while you're having sex? It's a different kind of love that no one talks about.

Like you guys aren't serious. Like no one's serious. Like having the conversation, like let's have a baby right now. But in the heat of the moment, have you ever had a guy be like, I want to get you pregnant? I've no, no, I have guys be like, I really hope you're not pregnant after that. And I'm so sorry.

And I'm like, give me $50. Okay. I like forgot this was a thing. And she had like brought it up talking about, I forget what we were even like, who we were even talking about, whatever. And I was like, oh my God. Yeah. I have had guys say that to me, but like, so in the past it was like two separate boyfriends have said it to me before. And I was like that it hits different. Like that love hits different. Well now I'm questioning like why has a guy never said that to me?

So you don't want to get pregnant? Because my kids would be very athletic and actually pretty annoying. My kids are going to be so fucking loud and annoying and like assholes. They're going to talk a lot. My thing that I love is when a guy said like, I want to fuck you with my soul. That's intense. Like that hit me differently. Because you know like the worst thing is when someone's having sex with you and you're like,

what are they thinking about or like you're just like i don't want to be here but like it's funny because most guys what they're thinking about during sex is like the grossest non-attractive thing like they're envisioning and vagining they're envisioning like their grandma or like a lamp or like a dog pooping like they just don't want to come

We're like we're trying to come And guys are trying not to come Not to So interesting So interesting And like you know like as a girl You get to the point where you're just like It's not happening for me Yeah Let's get it going You know and you just start pulling out all the stops Of like things that you know Like are just gonna wrap this Wrap this up

a fucking schedule. Like people talk about faking orgasms. What about just faking like extreme enjoyment? Extreme enjoyment. The things I say when I'm done and want to get out of there.

like and he's like oh my god yeah no but also like in how many different ways can you tell him his penis is big right like first like it's so big it's huge it's so deep it's so it's throbbing and then you're like okay i've i ran out of adjectives i'm sorry and there's part of you that's like we both know i'm lying i know i'm lying you know i'm lying let's go like

My TV show starts at 10 p.m. I've been waiting to watch it all week Like I gotta go You're so right There's a point where it's not like you don't like the sex But where you're just like Yeah I'm checked out It's done now I'm checked out We're good This is fun Thank you And now I will You are great

And then what's so hard is they're trying not to come when you're like praying that they come. Sometimes you just have to be like, I want you to come. Yeah. And I feel like boyfriend, like once you have a boyfriend and like you're consistently, it's like the same moves over and over. I feel like your boyfriends then start to know like, oh, you want to wrap this up because you only do this. And you're just like, what? What are you talking about? Yeah.

So true. People don't talk about it enough. People don't talk about it enough. The last like minute, you're like, let's go.

And they're trying to switch positions to stay or like what's it called when guys like purposely slow down to like make their orgasm better? I have no idea. It's called like saving it up. I don't know. But like you guys don't have to do that. That's all I have to say about that. We have a mental health moment coming on. I was talking to someone who is smarter than me and they were like, you realize like social media and like that attention stuff is a drug.

And I was like, explain more. And they were like, you love all the positive attention. Like you love looking on and people being like, Hannah, yeah, we like this. We like that. We like you. And they're like, and then it goes bad. You know, like then things get dark. But you still chase it for that original high when people were like,

I could get 10 messages of like, you're so fucking pretty and all this. And I'm like, I don't care. And then like you get like one person's like your front tooth is weird. And you're like, yeah, it's like a dopamine. I don't know. It's weird. I don't like it. I don't like the way it makes me feel. So I've been off Instagram for solidly a week and it's been really great. However, cause I started getting some positivity and,

I started like tweaking again. I was like, oh, I want it. Oh, yeah, I want that. And then I was like, no, no, no. You have to like stop. Like it's such a drug and it's just so crazy how many things you get addicted to. But like it's, yeah, it's a dopamine hit. But that you like really hurt your own feelings a lot of the time. You hurt your own feelings. I watched the Demi Lovato doc. Yeah. Do tell. Just...

Like crazy town Crazy town USI Why do you think She put out the documentary I think she wanted People to know Like how I feel like people How close she was to death

Yeah like I feel like people see celebrities and they're like oh they're a drug addict because they have so much money and they have nothing else to do like so yeah they're gonna get fucked up and they're gonna party and it was so much deeper than that. I mean so much deeper. The Britney Spears documentary like really shook a lot of people and then everyone forgot about it. Yeah. Like the same media outlets who were like this is so horrible are like shitting on

continue shitting on females and now and britney spears is also gonna like talk in court and her dad like wrote in something that when she he first was trying to get her conservatorship that she had dementia and then just like wanted control over everything and then he got it i'd seen a tick tock and i'd never related to it more oh i also want to give an update on my chlorophyll thing um i saw a tick tock and it was like the last thing i want is a relationship oh my god

Absolutely not do I want a boyfriend but I get obsessed with people who don't want to date me because I just want everyone to be in love with me but I don't want them but I don't like that you're not in love with me and I watched it and I was like am I the most toxic person on the planet because that's all I feel I'm like I don't want to date you but the fact that you don't want to date me now I can't like I'm so mad.

Because you have to find that love within yourself, not external. Spoken by a person who can't do that herself. Spoken by someone who can't even go on Instagram. So... Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you. Fuck you.

I'm literally like go to my phone and does like what are you doing and I'm like I'm literally becoming a drug addict I'm like nothing I go in the bathroom and I'm so overall do you think people should watch the Demi documentary do you think it was insightful do you think people like learned more about her I know people yeah I thought it was good it was just I mean it was so crazy to think it was really sad because it was like wow you have like

Anyone would ever want And like There are people Who are so struggling With addiction And they would kill To have like A team that she has Mm-hmm

And it was just so sad that she still just like can't get out of it. Yeah, and she had that interesting perspective where she was like, I'm California sober, where she says she smokes weed and drinks, but doesn't do the hard drugs. It was interesting because they had different people on like talking about that. Their opinion on it. Yeah, and they were just like, you know, you can't, everyone's different, everyone's whatever. And Elton John was on, he was like, it doesn't work.

I love Demi. It doesn't work. And my initial feeling was that too. Like if you're a drug addict, I mean, yeah, maybe like, I mean, I get, I guess some people get addicted to like pills and whatever. And, but, and drinking was never a problem so they can drink, but I don't know. But moral of this pod that we've getting into is you can get addicted to anything that is giving you that like high, but a hundred percent, like people who go into entertainment, obviously like have a,

dark hole in their heart that they want to fill from external validation high. So when you get very famous and you get like a ton of people who hate your success, it eats at you. And like I started to see fame so different, especially this last year, like where I'll see Justin Bieber and I just like feel sad for him. And I used to be like so envious of him just that like he was fucking incredible. But then I realized like,

He grew up and during his time where like he made some mistakes as a teenager the internet just like

on him. And she was saying that too, like how it's so lonely. Like, and I was thinking about like JLo and A-Rod because we're basically doing front page news, but whatever. Like, and how he's been, she's been seen out with like Ben Affleck and like if they're like back together, whatever. And I was, my first initial thought when I saw that article was like, oh my God, I love them. I want to know everything that's going on. But then I was like, wow, she's going through a breakup. She's doing what like

Normal ass girls do Where like Some ex might reach out And be like It was always supposed to be you And she's like Exploring it Or like doing whatever And it's like

You don't even want to tell your best friend when you do that. Like the amount of times I've had an ex like come over to my apartment and like no one's ever known. But you have to have like that weird conversation or you want to just like kick it with them one more time. You just want to be around a guy who like loved you. Yeah. And she, the whole world knows like that she's doing it. And I was just like, that's,

So crazy Like the amount of Sneaky rondes I've had You're rich Like they're rich And it's like money Is Especially when you have A lot of it It starts being Meaningless to you Right And then you're left With like Like Selena Gomez Is another example Where like She doesn't see The positives Right now Like she just Oh also Did you see like In her song It was like You replaced me In two months And people were Freaking out about it That like They broke up And he started Dating Hailey Two months later

I think that's a lot. It's hard also when it's public because he wanted to like

image wise he wanted to show like he could like him getting married he wanted to show like i'm done with all the bullshit and i'm a reformed person like men i think it got like i think fame got way too much for him and he wants i think whoever he had like in his like camp or on his team whatever i think they did a really good job because he could have become a real like serious drug addict and i think he

Well, if you watch his documentary with Haley, he talks about how like the highs of performing and whatever stuff he was using were so fucking high that now like normal life, he like can't feel joy. We were, which is terrifyingly sad. Scariest thing I've ever heard in my life. We were talking about it, Hannah. Remember when we were like, there's something up with him and Haley and we don't know what it is yet, but like something's weird there.

Oh yeah I texted Paige a full conspiracy theory about them I think There's something that You didn't respond because it was a very hot take Did I not respond? I don't think you did I'm really sorry but I read it and I saw it Do you agree? Yeah I do I've watched their YouTube clips before And you know when you see a couple And you're like nothing happened They're not fighting You get a weird energy from a couple I get a weird energy from them

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I think let's just call it here. What's the date? It is May 1st, 2021. At some point, something crazy. I think it's going to come out about the relationship. Hannah and I are calling it. And we want to make it clear. We're not manifesting it. We're rooting for them. We're not manifesting it. No, I'm not manifesting it. No, this is an energy I feel. We hope it's not true, but this is an energy that we feel. And I don't know. Okay, wait.

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No go. Oh, I was just going to say last thing about them is like dating Justin Bieber is not easy. You're dating a guy who's not dealing with normal world stuff and it's very difficult. So kudos to Haley.

Yeah. And this like ties into I've been watching this show because Alex Cooper like had it on her Instagram and I've been like, I don't know. I've been home a lot lately and I'm like, I need to binge. Yeah. So I started watching it's on Showtime couples therapy. Tell me about it because I thought it might be like too upsetting to watch. Like I don't want to watch relationships that are falling apart. It's crazy that to be able. I think this is like.

I don't know why this is the way that it is. I can look at a friend's relationship. I can look at like anyone's relationship and be like, and they can say what's wrong in it. And you can pinpoint like, well, you should leave. That's crazy. Or like, this is, this is this, or this is that, whatever. But for some reason you can never do it in your own. So it's basically set up like a documentary style. And there's like three different couples and they go in and the therapist is fucking amazing. Um,

And you're just watching them talk about their relationship and what they want and what's wrong with it. And it's crazy how there's certain things that you're like, wow, I do that. And oh my God, that is like shit that I've done before.

It's just so eye-opening. And you just... I feel like I'm in therapy when I'm watching it. So it's, like, really informative. Yes. Like, the major takeaway that I took out of it... And I think I related it a lot back to, like, my relationship with Perry...

When you have like a grievance with your partner or something in your brain, you have an extreme version of what your relationship is. He has an extreme version of what the relationship is. That's biased to each other. Neither are right. Yeah. Neither are right. And so she gets to like, what's,

actually going on i mean there's one couple in the first season that the guy is just a total fucking asshole and the girl's in like a fully mentally abusive relationship and she should actually get out but you keep watching them because the therapist gets down to the root of like why is he like that and why does he think he would ever agree to do a show because he's so like

He thinks he's right. So unaware that he's like put the, all of these feelings to a subconscious that he thinks he doesn't even have them. And he thinks that nothing in his childhood affected him. It's also crazy to me. And like, this is one of like the world wonders I'll never understand. Yeah.

that your childhood is such a small part of your life and shapes who you are for the rest of your fucking life. Like there's things in your childhood you don't even remember. Like from age like five to 15, I don't remember half the shit, but it's why I am the way I am right now at 28. I think the first seven years literally writes the story of your life.

That's terrifying. Is it not? Yeah, it's so fucking terrifying. But it's also why like I highly encourage people to go to therapy because like you don't know your subconscious. You don't know why you're reactive to certain things when like first you find out the why. So you feel less crazy. It's like anxiety. Like you can't say I don't want anxiety. But when you start getting it, you could easily be like, OK, this is anxiety. I don't have to attach to it. You could be like, oh, this is my trigger from like this thing that happened to me. I mean, a lot of millennials, especially New Yorkers, like we're all fucked up from 9-11.

Yeah. Like that's fucking scary to like you're when I was 10. Wow. You don't even. Yeah. My first experience of the world was being like, hey, all your friends' parents could die. Like, sorry to get dark, but like that's what it was like being in New York City. Wow, that's so interesting. Yeah, I didn't even think of that. So you're just at every moment are like, wait, the world is a really scary place. Where then people growing up in like the 90s.

Or, like, who were, like, 10 in the 90s when shit was, like, really happy. Had, like, a different outlook, maybe. It's also crazy as you get older. Like, and I'll talk about this stuff with my mom. And, like, or, like, people that I'm, like, oh, they had, like, a horrible childhood. And I feel so bad. And she'll always be, like, that's why it's so important when you pick your husband. She was, like, your marriage, of course, is really important. But, like, you have to make sure this guy is...

No matter what happens with you two is going to be a good dad. He doesn't fuck your kids up. And like now at 28, when I'm like, think like talking to random guys or like going on dates, whatever it is in my head and it freaks me out. And I'm like, you and I would probably get divorced, but you would make a sick dad. Like you'd be great at it. But then there's some people who like, they're really hot and you like have amazing chemistry, but it's like, you might fight. Yeah.

When it comes to his parenting, like how he treats the kids or his decisions for it or how helpful he is. And it's so crazy. I've had boyfriends before and we won't name names, but I've been like, I would never want my kids to call you dad and I would never want them to feel...

Like the shit I would know You would make them feel And it's And it's Such a switch in your brain That's like yep And now we're breaking up Like I've had that feeling And been like I'm breaking up with you And you're listening to your dad I'm not alone And to everyone Who's like in a relationship Right now That they're like I'm not sure I'm not sure Like Do you know what it's like To hang out with the right person Or like a good friend And the whole perspective Of the world is different When you're with that person Yes Like that's literally What it is in relationships If you're in a dark place And you're with someone That you're like eh Literally

But that's why it's so important to be with the right person because they shape your perspective on life. They're the person you put all your thoughts to. They're the person who reacts to everything in your life. And it's important that you create a safe space for your mind and yourself. And if you're not in a good place with yourself, you won't be making the right decisions of who that person will be because you'll be desperate. Yeah.

like if you're just like oh i just need someone that's not going to be someone necessarily that is going to be a good person for you long term so true it's so true i used to be like that like i need a boyfriend i need a boyfriend and now i'm like also do you remember summer house when we had like they showed our one bonding like perry talk where i remember being like you have to tell him

yeah and that's so couples therapy where it's like he can't read your brain it's crazy because i watched that back and had such a different perspective on it than in the moment you like weren't really listening to me like in the moment i wanted this conversation overdone i didn't want to think about it and then i re-watched it and i was like oh my god she was so right like i was so scared to just be like dude i don't this isn't what i want i'm

I want I'm not having fun You couldn't even go there With your brain No I couldn't Shut the fuck up My conscience Like would not even Let me get there To think about it Because you felt like You'd be a horrible person To tell someone That like You weren't happy This isn't what I wanted And that it was selfish of you

Yes. With the couples therapy, the show, are they married? Are they in long-term relationships? Like what's the deal? So it's all different. Like the first season, there were these, this one woman and she was dating a transgender woman. Oh, cool. Then the next couple, they were dating

They were married and they were like, they're having a lot of issues. And then I think the third couple was married too. And then the second season, one was just dating, but they had a kid together. So it's like all different. Then there was like two, there was two gay guys. They were just dating. It's all different. And like, but everyone has like the same shit and it's just crazy. Like there's this one couple and like,

I felt like it was like I was almost watching myself. I was like, you don't like him. You don't like him. Stop convincing yourself that you like him. And it was, I don't know. It's just such a good show. You guys have to watch it and like give it a chance because it's like it's not like a serious show where you have to like really pay attention. But like it's kind of eye opening and just interesting. I also have a theory in relationships like I I'm not going to name names, but there's this one guy who like grew up in Florida and

And he met his girlfriend in college and like she lives in California. And like in the very beginning, they were like, she's like, I want to live in California. He's like, I want to live in Florida. Yeah. They've been together forever. And it's like still their biggest problem. I also have been like, oh, you know, I'm obsessed with like Courtney and Travis and like their love affair. And I'm so obsessed with MGK and Megan Fox. So I've been looking up a lot about like finding your twin flame. It's my new manifestation thing. They say your twin flame is not your soulmate. Not always. Yeah.

Is it because they are saying each other's twin flame? Travis's? No, not Travis and Courtney. They haven't said it. But like Megan Fox and MGK, they're like we're twin flames. And like I've just been reading about what a twin flame is. Can you explain what a twin flame is to the gigglers? It's basically someone who like...

Is part of your soul. Like it's a soul that splits into two people. So like they say when you meet your twin flame, there's this weird feeling of like having always known them or like feeling very comfortable. But it can get very volatile, which like is the reason. Yeah, which is the reason.

Most people don't end up long term with their twin flame. But if you do, and if you like make through whatever, you guys have the craziest passionate in love relationship. Like if for some reason you guys can make it work, but most of the time it can be volatile.

I'm just obsessed with it. Like I'm obsessed with it. Me and Dominique text about it all the time. I'm like, no, I think I met my twin flame like years ago. She's like, you're crazy. No, I don't know. It's just like so interesting. I feel like Des is my twin flame. Really? Cause he's a Scorpio and I'm a Leo. Like that shit is like intense and we're so, so similar. That's what we are. I know. Cause also I'm Scorpio rising. Yeah. Yeah.

So like I'm Aquarius. It's just a lot. But Leo goes well with Aquarius. I don't know. Basically, I did the math and like. Yeah. Astrologically. You ran the numbers. Yeah. Mathematically. Yeah. You guys are soulmates. I remember learning about a couple of years ago and being like scared of it. Being like, oh, no. What if I fall in love with my twin flame and then it blows up because it's too good. And there's also just a weird feeling of like I recently got to this point where it was just like.

Not that like I'm ready to like be married and like fall in love, but I feel more ready than I've ever felt. Like I was sitting on the couch by myself the other night and it was like, this is last night. I don't know why I said the other night. Friday night and all my friends were like going out, going to this dinner, going to like whatever. And I just like had no interest in going anywhere.

And I was just like so content being home and like by myself. And I was like, you know, like when it happens, it's going to happen. I can't wait. But like I can't like script it. So I don't mean to laugh at you. No.

That's a lie Next thing Next time on things That are untrue This is why I love this podcast With you Because literally Last week This bitch is like I just want Someone who parties with me I just want Someone who has fun And partying I just want to be single For the rest of my life Like I literally I'm allowed To change my mind One night This bitch decides She's too tired to go out And she's like I want a family

I want a family. I want to wipe your face. And thank you for calling me out of my bullshit. I'm calling you out, but I also agree with you. Like, that's like, that's part of what your 20s is. But I do want someone who parties with me. I want someone who parties with me and will have my babies. I want someone who's going to be a good dad on Friday night, wants to watch a documentary, and on Saturday night wants to absolutely fucking rip it. Yeah, someone who doesn't take a tequila shot like a little bitch.

yeah i wanted to i want him to look at me from across the bar and be like drink the shot you fucking loser and i'm like okay but it's true like being single comes with like oh it's so fun to be out but then also like realizing like oh i'm kind of like liking who i am and i feel like i deserve to be shared with someone else to like enjoy myself like a relationship is a mirror and if you're not happy with yourself that means that when you

are with someone they're a mirror and you're not happy with you what you see but as you get comfortable with yourself you want a mirror to be able to like experience you i think it was also like i moved into my apartment oh my god we have to talk about my organizational imagine it done guys i can't i have a love affair i have a love affair with them i will quit everything and just go work for them and like hang out with them like i loved it watch

Yeah and by work I mean like I just want to kick it with the girls When they go to different projects And like look at people's clothes Well that's the home edit Have you watched the home edit on Netflix? I haven't watched it You have to They do Khloe Kardashian's like pantry It's really good It's just so many things And I wasn't going to do it at first Because I was like I can just like organize my closet It'll take It'll be a long process But I'll just do it No

There's so many things that they organized that I would have never even thought of. Under my kitchen sink, just making sure all my cleaning products were in a rotating thing. I was just like, this is the most amazing thing I've ever dealt with. And you were worried at first. You were like, my mom's really neat. I could do this. Yeah, I was like, my mom could just do this. It'll be fine. And then they came in and they were here for two full days and I was just like,

You guys are all in my wedding. I literally formed such a bond. Like related to it. Hannah, it's so different. Like I had in my old apartment, I didn't just have a junk drawer. I had a junk cabinet. Yeah. Where I had like

You know like important papers That you have to have Like your W-2s And like your tax returns Like stupid shit like that I had pictures From like the last five years I had wrapping paper Tissue paper Like Old fake eyelashes Yeah like I just had My hair extensions Scrunchies Like I just had like dumb shit

Just pennies Like why Are there pennies everywhere Literally I have a bag of coins A bag of coins The girl pulled it out of the bag Or out of the box She was like We have $10,000 Worth of quarters She was like What do you want to do with this And I was like I don't know Like give it to a homeless person I don't know But so there was this box In my apartment That said junk drawer And the one girl Her name was Rachel And I'm obsessed with her And she was like

She was like, can we go through this? And I was like, no, that's my junk drawer. Whatever. I'll deal with it. And she was like, we're going through it. Hannah, I don't have one thing in my apartment that has clutter. And you don't think about your junk drawer a lot that you know of.

In your subconscious When things are like messy And like accumulate It does fuck with you I think the state of your room Is the state of your mind Yes It's coming from a very messy person

And they say that like in your bedroom, you shouldn't do any like work stuff or anything, which is bad for us because we love to lay in bed and do shit. That you really shouldn't because it clutters your mind. And like when you go into your bedroom, you should get an automatic calm feeling of like, this is where I sleep. This is where I relax. All that other bullshit during the day happens in a different room. Because like I would wake up and like I had a little couch, but I was like, this bed is way better than that couch. How much stuff did you have to throw away or like part with?

I threw a lot of stuff away I would say like at least 20 full like garbage bags of just like tchotchkes and I will say this was it hard no I'm great at throwing things away I just need someone to be like you don't need this and I'm like you're right throw it out

When I was living in my studio, like toward the end, I really felt myself like slipping into a depression. Like I just like couldn't do anything. Like I couldn't get up and like make outfit videos because I didn't have any room. I didn't like know where all my clothes were. And I was just like frustrated. Overwhelmed. And I didn't like realize it until I got into my new apartment. And it's just it's crazy that your space really does change.

have like an effect on your mental health oh my god so many great mental health moments today yeah so imagine it done is organizing and they're also therapists imagine it done amazing amazing follow them on instagram inquire for your own home happiness unsponsored we've been like touching on front page news but do you want to finish yeah

Okay, so we talked about Britney is going to court. Her dad said that she had, like, dementia. We talked about Jennifer Lopez. And so, basically, I guess he's been, like, seen out with Ben a lot. And he was getting out of, like, her white SUV. And he's been, like, spotted at her home. Okay, hot take.

Yeah, let's talk about it. Is he single? Yeah, he's single. Okay. So I think that Ben has been in the shitter in terms of like the press. Like all they have is photos of him like with a cigarette and like Amazon boxes looking disheveled. And like a Dunkin' Donuts coffee. Yeah. And Jen, not in the best place media wise. Like A-Rod cheating on her with a reality person. No offense to us. Not great. Yeah.

I can imagine their teams being like, hey, if J-Lo, if Bennifer became a thing, people will lose their mind. Like people will forget about A-Rod. People will fucking freak out. I think it's mutual beneficial to both of them. If they fall in love again, great. I personally don't love exes getting back together. There's a reason it didn't work out and it'll happen again. However, you hate exes getting back together. I hate it. I hate it. You did it. You done it. You live that life. There's so many fucking fish in the sea. Don't go with the barnacle that you already fucked.

Go back A lot There's like two There's literally like Two boyfriends That I That we We never went back And everyone else I'm like Come over I agree I do Like Paige If they didn't want to see If they didn't want people To see them They wouldn't do that They wouldn't be seen

I agree. I think it's a publicity stunt. And I think PR is one of the craziest professions and no one talks about it enough because now the story has been manipulated and changed to, oh my God, they would be the perfect couple. They could be so in love.

They're obviously not getting back together I don't think at all And in a couple weeks We're not even going to hear about Ben and Jen But we're going to hear about Jen And how she's thriving And she's just like taking time for herself And she's like dating And a lot of guys want to be with her But she's choosing not to And that's her new narrative She's strong She's independent She's not some woman who got cheated on By fucking A-Rod

The media is good. Who will literally cheat on anything. Yeah, he obviously has like a sex problem, I feel like. I feel like if you're a serial cheater, you should go to therapy. You have something deeper. You're like deeper going on. Well, even not even like addicted to sex. You could just be addicted to like not being in a healthy relationship. Yeah, you're addicted to like girls wanting you. Like yeah, there's something going on with you. There are certain things that you buy every single summer. Sandals, sunscreen, snacks, etc.

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Elon Musk is hosting SNL which is kind of interesting. Interesting? But a lot of the cast doesn't like him and the creator of the show was like I never make any of my cast like film with people they don't want to film with which is like really nice. Why don't they like him? They think that he's like ruining our planet. Okay. Interesting. I love the tension that it's gonna because like comedy and tension is just whoo.

um but there was michael um how do you say his last name michael the guy that does the weekend update oh michael chai michael chai who i think is fucking hilarious i've watched some of his stand-ups came to my birthday party that i ripped my shut up yeah i was at that party yeah him and jared oh my god when i ripped the back of my dress i think he's so funny and he was like i

He was on Jimmy Fallon and he was like, I just hope like Elon Musk upholds the SNL tradition that the host always gives a couple million dollars to the cast. I'm like, I hope he knows that. And like, I just thought that was funny. So he's like hosting it. Miley Cyrus is performing. Mm hmm.

So that's good. Also, remember when Lady Gaga got her dog stolen, she gave like a $500,000 reward and like some random woman found it and was like, oh, I found the dogs like tied to a pole. And so her dad came out and was like, I never believed that. And it was actually like five people that ended up getting arrested. They just wanted like the reward money. Also, $500,000 to get your dogs back. I'm sorry. Wait, so she paid a girl? Was that girl connected with the people who stole the dog? Yeah. Yeah.

Did she get her money back? I have no idea. These are important. Probably not. What's going on with Chloe and Tristan? You wrote that in the notes. Oh, yeah. Fuck. Where is that article? Whatever. I'm just going to go off muscle memory with this one. Okay, athlete. So basically, this girl went on a podcast and she was like, yeah, like I've had sex with Tristan. And like most recently, he's like texted me when that podcast comes out, came out.

People freaked out the girls fucking gorgeous though gorgeous and she was just kind of saying like look we had a relationship I had no idea he was in a relationship but like Tristan still out here cheating and anyone who thought otherwise that he wasn't is stupid. So it's kind of like I feel like the media didn't even really make it that big of a thing because it's like yeah obviously he's still cheating.

And how is Kris Jenner handling this in the PR world? They're just trying to pretend it didn't happen. I think so. They're good at that, though. Like, they're good at, like, squashing stories. But then they, like, will create something big off of, like, Khloe taking a photo down so people are distracted. He was probably cheating on her that moment. They were like, yeah, let's get a photo drama. You know what else people aren't talking about? The last season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians when, like,

Kim and Khloe were so mad at Kourtney because she didn't want to like do the show anymore, which I totally fucking get. They've been doing it for 20 years. Um,

Courtney had to always talk about her and Scott like and had like some really crazy moments in their relationship and like her personal life. And she gave a lot in like the first couple seasons of the show. Like she put it all out there. She got pregnant by him. They were not even together. They showed that the birth of their kids. She had two more kids with them. Like they just showed so much of her life. And the second some shit goes awry with Kim and Kanye, she won't film.

She won't film. Holy shit. And they were screaming at her like, you don't do your job. You don't work. And she's like, I have done this show with you guys. I don't want to do it anymore. I put my dues in. Now when it's time for Kim to put hers in of like her relationship, we don't see it.

Oh my god You nailed it Because now I remember I don't watch The Kardashians So I can't Speak on it that much But someone sent me A scathing I will say I will say this though To preface Before you go I love the Kardashians I fucking I don't If you don't love them Whatever I got a scathing review Just about like Supporting Kourtney That

Courtney put all that Scott stuff so in the forefront of like torture and like having Scott be like part of the cast even like even though he's hurt you so much and all this stuff she put it all even now so hypocritical that Kim is like oh I can't film now yeah I think it's

Kind of wild I mean Chloe did like they felt obviously They filmed like the Tristan stuff but Yeah it's just like she there's The shots on the show or like Kim Out in the backyard like on the phone And it's just like she doesn't want to talk About it and I'm like yeah Entertainment it's hard to be like Yeah your divorce details Bitch but

But I just think like, let's acknowledge Kourtney. They bully her. Like they're like... Right. And yeah, I'm not saying like Kim should show it. Like that's probably so tough. I mean, there's things like on TV that I'm like, I'm not fucking talking about that. It's a classic power dynamics struggle where Kim's like, I need you guys. And they're like, yeah, and we've like done the best we can. Yeah. I just want to acknowledge just how premium Kourtney really is. I also want to acknowledge how premium...

chloe really is and it like i don't know the details of the relationship but like i just hope she knows she deserves the best i know it's so oh my god i don't think i would i haven't had to deal with a cheating boyfriend in like years so i don't i really don't know how i would especially because like as you get older obviously you change so much but like i don't think i would ever be able to put up with it now

Like at 24 and 25, I was like, yeah, whatever. I'm not even marrying you. But then when kids are involved and stuff, it gets tough. Yeah, like I could never do it now. Ever. And also when the whole world knows about it. No. But also, obviously, Kim brought so much to the show, but it's just nothing lasts forever. No, it really doesn't. But we want to thank everyone for...

The see you in court merch drop. Oh my God. You guys fucking loved it. Love that. You loved it. We're going to have to see you in court if you didn't like it, but you did. So we won't see you in court.

someone was like it seems like you're saying it in a really nice way and like we wanted it bold and dark and i was like no like see you in court is like okay well difference of opinion see you in court see you in court sexy subtle and firm like you know what i get excited for too hannah what like what our next saying will be because like we don't know we don't know you know like one day we'll just say something we'll both look at each other and be like

It hit. It hit. We can't control it. I can't wait to see what it is. People are like, when's your next merch shop? We don't know. It could be years. Yeah, we don't know because we have to have a thing. And that's organic. And when you force it, just like poops and relationships, it would hurt. You get fucked. You get fucked. Thank you for giggling with us today, guys. We love you so much. And yeah. Bye. Bye.