GBF - Goodbye, Lark
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God bless football, Billy Gill. God bless football, Mikey, eh? God bless football, Fuentes. God bless football, Stu Gatz. Thank you, Fuentes. A very exciting day. Billy already wants to say something. We have not one, but two blind rankings. We have headlines. We have more Mike Lee, but first we go to Billy because Billy has something to say. Well, no, I just wanted to say this episode of God Bless Football is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings.com.

The crown is yours. Sad one today. So you got a little bit of a sad one, but let's be happy here. Yeah, sad because? This is our last episode of God Bless Football at Metal Ark Media. So we can talk about that a little bit later if you want. Just, you know...

A little trip down memory lane today, maybe. We'll see how it goes. Okay. Last episode at Metal Ark Media, but not the last episode. In fact, we'll be expanding God Bless Football. So if you care about Billy and his family, please subscribe to it. If you care about Mikey A and his family, subscribe and rate to it. If you care about Fuentes at all and his family, then leave a review. Okay? You need to do that for us because I'm telling you right now, if you don't, none of our kids are going to eat. All right? Also...

if you hate us, good news. This is probably the last time you will see from us unless you go and subscribe to us because we will virtually disappear from all of these feeds that you see us in right now except the God bless football feed. So follow that and follow our channels and follow our socials. And again, if you have thoughts on Fuentes, you can support him by leaving comments apparently. Yes. And we will have news. That's the only way to.

We'll have news for you regarding God bless football coming up in the next in the next week or so. So, Billy, we have one but not two blind rankings. This is very exciting. Mike has one. No. So then we do have to.

Yes, we have two. I should just say we have two. You're right. We have two blind rankings. Fuentes has one. Mikey A has one. We have headlines. We have more Mike Lee. And I'm wondering, where does Billy Gill on our final episode at Metal Ark Media, where does he want to go first? Well, first, we have headlines. I want to go to here's a headline because that seems like a good, fun way to start the show. But I have a bit of sad news to God that I want to tell you.

and the audience. And I don't know if this is something that will cause them to tune out immediately or not. But I thought with this being our last episode at the Lark, that maybe we invite back, you know, like a friend or some friends. So I thought, well, I don't want to reach out to K-Funk. He usually wrangles all of our friends. And K-Funk told me

He was shocked when I gave him the news that this was the last episode at the Lark. And then he told me, what time? Tomorrow's my son's high school graduation, but what time are you thinking? And I said, K-Funk, that's a lot more important than this, so why don't you just tend to that? Right.

And then he later offered, well, I'll be available at 3 or 4 in the afternoon if you want. And I said, we'll check back on that. I don't know about that. We'll see. So we may later have a Zoom call with K-Punk, but I don't know if it'll be recorded. Maybe it will be. Maybe we'll just toss it in the episode. Who knows what we're going to be doing at 3 o'clock. Maybe we'll be feeling...

a little silly. Do you think if given the choice kids graduation or record the final episode on the Lark of God bless football, if you get, if they were conflicting times, do you think K funk would have chosen to record with us? I mean, what do you think? I think given the opportunity, if we told him just do a quick check-in that he would have done it from the graduation, but I, yeah, I'd want to try to avoid that situation. So Mikey, you're agreeing with him. I,

There's no question he's calling while they're announcing names and he's saying, hold on a second. Yeah. And then going back to it's a thing where like he's on the phone and then he realizes his kid has walked across the stage and he wasn't recording because he was on the phone with us recording this. And then it's a whole thing.

If you really want K-Funk to be on the show, all you have to do is tell him Mojo will be on the show. And I guarantee you K-Funk misses everything to make sure he's not left out when Mojo's on the show. That's a fair point. So of all the past guests, it wasn't Chris Sims you reached out to. It wasn't Mike Golick that you reached out to. It was K-Funk. Well, I mean, Sims was on a couple weeks ago as part of our Metal Ark retirement tour. So I thought that hitting him back up this soon was a little close.

Golik, I'm not sure how that one works. So I left that one alone. And yeah, so I thought, let me reach out to Kay Funk and then just see where we can go from there. And when he was out, I was like, maybe we just do a regular show and disappear off into the sunset without...

guests and bells and whistles. We made a 35-minute tribute of some of our greatest moments on God Bless Football that we were going to air. But then once Kay Funk said that he couldn't do it, we kind of just scrapped the plan. You'll just get, instead of a best of...

You know, Sarah McLachlan, I Will Remember You, any of that stuff. End of the Road. Yeah, no Vitamin C graduation song. None of that's happening today. Closing time. We're leaving all that. I hope you have the time of your life. Yeah, none of that's going to happen today. Today we're just going to do, here's a headline. Okay. All right, good. There is a chance the show still remains on the DraftKings network. This has nothing to do with DraftKings. We love them. They've been great partners. The crown's theirs. Right. If you're upset about this, get mad at the Lark.

In particular, Levitard and David Sampson. Anyway, ready for here's the headline? Okay, so here's a headline. Joe Flacco wants to lead Browns QB by example, not be mentor. Huh. Huh. He never wants to be a mentor. Sounds like Joe Flacco wants to play. When Joe Flacco comes to your team, he's coming for your job. Like, that's... Yeah. The thing is, is that...

That's exactly the situation with Joe Flacco right now. And I wonder almost if Joe Flacco wants to start the season not as a starter. Like Joe Flacco wants to be the backup so he can hunt his prey from behind. Joe Flacco is not one to stab you in the front, friends. Joe Flacco, when he's there in the QB room, he's there to stab you from behind. Not in the back.

but from behind right yes how does he do that like he watches the film of the starting quarterback and tells the qb coach i wouldn't make that throw he just i mean in many of these instances joe kind of just needs to sit back and let them take care of themselves you know joe flacco is also that fan favorite like as soon as your starter starts to waver a little bit as soon as he starts to struggle

All of a sudden you start hearing those whispers in the stands. You know Joe Flacco wouldn't do that. You know who's sitting right there smoking a cigarette on the bench? Joe Flacco. Not moving. Yeah, not moving. I'm sure Joe Flacco could come in and win us some games. Yeah. Yeah.

it'd be very comforting if Joe Flacco were my backup quarter he was our backup quarterback Mikey we never got to him okay well yeah if he's if he's your backup quarterback for your team it's comforting if you're the starting quarterback and he's your backup not at all because Joe picks his spots right well I think that's what Mikey is saying like you know with a starting job comes expectations the backup job is always the most popular guy in the stadium he's he he

he connotes hope, you know, he's, he's the next guy. Especially with that group in Cleveland. Yeah. Joe Flacco doesn't want the starting job out of camp. He wants the backup role. Billy, here's a headline. Hey, Caleb Williams swears. He wants to be in Chicago. Sure. He does. That was a weird story. Caleb Williams. I feel like.

If the story's gonna come out that you were gonna make a big mess of things...

you should have just made a big mess of things, right? Because now you didn't make a mess of things. And now it's still messy. The city of Chicago is reacting to you as though you did make a mess of things. So you should have just made a mess of things. Also, and this I mean this as respectfully as possible. And you guys know that I'm a big part of, you know, Bears Nation. And also, you know,

Cardinals, Fly Eagle Fly. Oh, the Arizona Cardinals. I forgot to tell you guys. I'm going to look for it in a break. The Arizona Cardinals sent me a care package this week just because of what a big Bird Gang fan I am. Because I'm such a big member of Bird Gang, they sent me a care package this week. They're trying to butter you up before the season. That's what's happening. Yeah, well, I did kind of pick them last week in a situation where we had to choose which division would be worse, more Mike Lee, and I didn't choose their division. So...

Right. Anyways, where were you? So Caleb Williams. Yeah. I think you need to be better to cause these kinds of problems for yourself. Respectfully, if you're going to be demanding not to go to a city, which he didn't ultimately do. But if we're going to be dabbling with the idea of demanding to not go to a city, God, be a little bit better, friend. You're saying make a mess of it like Eli did when he came out in the draft. Right. In retrospect, yeah.

And he may be a Hall of Famer. In retrospect, was Eli good enough to make the mess of things that he made of things? On the front end, probably not. He was hyped enough. Right. Probably. He was not good enough, Mike. He was the number one or number two pick? No, he was the number one pick. Right. But he was hyped enough to make a mess like that. Was he good enough? I don't know. But he had the last name. He had the stats. Yeah.

And he had RG, his dad, doing a lot of the work and a lot of the talking for him at the time. I mean more so when you look back at his career, was it worth the mess that he made? Was he indeed good enough to have made the mess that he made?

The mess paid off, Billy. Yeah. I mean, he won two Super Bowls as the New York Giants quarterback, and both of them came against Tom Brady. All right. Just asking. Just asking here. Worked out for Eli. Just asking here. All right. That's a good question. Mikey, do you have a headline for us? Yeah. Hey, here's a headline. Steph

stefan diggs was not present at wednesday's voluntary organized team activity one day after a video of the wide receiver surfaced on social media in which he was on a boat with an unidentified pink substance around three women i uh i have an admission i had to ask around what does this mean because uh

I don't I know you guys. I know you be careful who you ask. I know you guys see me and you say, Billy Gill, that's a guy that does a lot of drugs. But I may surprise you. I had to ask what what this meant. So what is this? It's what I say to myself when I see you every day. That guy over there. Drug addict. Big guy. Billy Bill. Billy Pill.

All right. The point you just gave me. I mean, anywho, I didn't know what it was. I had to ask him around. I was like, so what does that mean? What does pink substance mean? What could be pink? I mean, what could be pink? I don't know.

So Diggs was not at practice after this video service because Mike Rabel is the coach Patriot way all that. Well, no, I mean, it's it's voluntary OTAs like a lot of people weren't at these things. So he volunteered to be on a boat with the pink. I mean, if I had the option to volunteer to be on a boat or in Foxborough, I think I'd be on a boat.

Problem is he just got there and I guess technically hasn't gotten there yet because he's not there, but he's new to the, he's new to the program there. So he's not really ingratiating himself very well, I guess. I mean, I just spent a weekend in Foxborough. I would go on a boat. I would do anything other than spend the day in Foxborough. If I'm being completely honest, it's so weird to have that stadium so far from Boston. It's crazy. What, what level one to 10 of a nonsense guy do you think Mike Vrabel is? Yeah,

Level one to 10, 10 being the highest, like he takes no nonsense. No. Who would be a 10? Who would be a 10 on the no nonsense? I'm glad that you asked that question. Just clarifying. There is the amount of nonsense that you're willing to take and the amount of nonsense that is within you. I was asking more or less, how much nonsense do you think exists inside of Mike Vrabel that is waiting to come out?

I will tell you that I caddied for Golik at the Lake Tahoe golf tournament. Ray Romano was part of his threesome. The other one was Mike Vrabel. Me, Golik, and Ray Romano were having a blast, laughing it up, yucking it up. Vrabel, not so much. Really? Very serious golfer. It's interesting, that dynamic that you just laid out, because in most golf situations, I think foursomes are the regular, and there was four, right?

You included as Gullick's caddy. You were just, I guess, not allowed to golf. They decided to have it be a threesome, even though there were four of you. So at Tahoe, just the way they have it laid out, they do. So for the Pro-Am, which I participate in every year and actually play golf, it's foursomes. For the actual tournament itself, they go threesomes, three celebrities per game.

per group, I guess. And Vrabes was a no-nonsense guy. Vrabes just took... He was taking the golf very, very seriously. He didn't want to be bothered. He didn't want me asking questions. I was trying to mess around. I was doing a thing. I was Gold's caddy. He didn't want anything of it. I would say that Vrabel is... He's pretty high on the no BS meter. What do you think Vrabel's response would be if you went and swapped out his ball with one of those exploding balls that makes all the noise?

I would have blamed it on Ray. Okay. He would not have been happy, Bill, if that's what you're a... Hey, can I give you a quick headline? Here's a headline. The College Football Hall of Fame will lower its win percentage from 60% to 59.5%...

making Mike Leach eligible to join the College Football Hall of Fame. Wow. You know who is most excited about that? I do know who's most excited about that. And I am very interested in looking into win percentages right now to see if he's eligible or not. Ha ha.

Can we find out all the guys who are right around 59%? Les Miles, who lost his bid to the Hall of Fame when wins were vacated, dropping him under 60%. And now he's probably right there. I was going to say, when we come back, find out if Les Miles is now eligible for the College Football Hall of Fame or not and can drop his lawsuit against LSU. But...

Because it's our last episode here on The Lark, I'm not going to leave you hanging. Les Miles' career win percentage in college. Hold on a second. This doesn't make any sense because it says he has a 665 win percentage, which means he was already eligible. Yeah, but take some wins away. They vacated some wins, didn't they? When we come back. Not enough.

I'm going to figure out what these statistics mean because I'm very confused right now. All right, well, that's a nice tease, but I think it's the last show and Fuentes has a headline, so I want to get to Mike Fuentes as well. Fuentes, do you have a headline for us? Yes, Will Levis says he's trying to be the same dude despite QB battles, but the same dude is what got him there in the first place.

Yeah, I would not be the same dude. That's your problem. Don't do that. Yeah, try a different dude. Try a different dude. Wait, Will Levis is still in Tennessee, right? Correct. Yes. No, no. Will Levis went from the most, just back to our original conversation about Joe Flacco, okay? Will Levis went from a guy that Tennessee Titan fans despise to a guy who's going to be the most popular guy in the building if Cam Ward's playing bad. What is he doing? Being the same dude. Yeah. Embrace being the backup.

All right. It seems as though his win percentage, man, it's all over the place, but it seems as though it might be 59.7. So he's eligible. Rounding up. Oh, they dropped it to 59 and a half. He's in. He's eligible. That's so ridiculous. All right. Coming up next, blind rankings. Medium, medium rare, medium well, medium.

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96 calories and 3.2 carbs for 12 ounces. God bless football is presented by Smirnoff, the world's number one vodka. Please drink responsibly. Stugatz, guess what time it is. What time is it, Billy? This is quickly becoming one of my favorite segments, particularly in the offseason. And it is. And we have two today.

One is a little more self-involved than the other one. This is our blind rankings presented by Spirit Off, the world's number one vodka. Please drink responsibly. And also, we do game days. Please drink responsibly. Fuentes.

Do you have blind rankings for us this week? We do. I thought I had exhausted all the cool positions, but you guys said, let's do coaches. So I said, hey, it's the last episode. Let's do coaches. Are these head coaches? These are head coaches, head coaches only. Current head coaches only. Can I ask an indelicate question? Yeah, can I ask an indelicate question? Well, you're going to ask anyway, so go ahead.

These are current head coaches, right? Correct. That's not the indelicate question. The indelicate question is to God, so maybe we should have done this off air, but if we go somewhere, should we try to lure Mike Fuentes away and watch the empire collapse from within? Or do we just kind of say forget it? We could find someone else and maybe we bring back Mikey C.

Oh, Mikey C. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What if we existed in a world where both Mike Fuentes and Mikey C could be on the show? But then he'd be Mikey F also. Mikey F, Mikey C, Mikey A. I'm going to start calling you Mikey. Yeah, that'd be like the whole alphabet. Listen.

I want Mikey C with us. I do not want to have to rely on him the way we rely on Fuentes to actually do things. I want Mikey C with us, but I don't want him to have to press buttons. Maybe we can have Mike Fuentes do stuff with us, but just secretly. And we'll just call him Mikey F. And then no one will know. Nobody will know. Yeah, no one will know.

I'll just wear sunglasses at every taping. Yeah. You'll never figure it out. How would anyone practice those? They'll never know. It's just one of those things, man. I mean, especially with sunglasses. There's a lot of people that sound alike, you know? You never know. Anyway, Mikey F. You're in rare form today, man. I love you. Our first coach in this week's edition of Blind Rankings is Kevin O'Connell, Minnesota Vikings. Ooh.

Man, that's a good coach right there. I will go first with this one. I mean, that guy almost got the one seed in the NFC with Sam Darnold. Kevin O'Connell, number two. Wow. He's a good coach, Billy. I don't know what other names are there. He's a fantastic coach. He's a fantastic coach. Think about what he has done with the quarterbacks that he's had. Right.

Yeah. Has he won anything? I thought about it. He's a great coach. I'm putting him at number three. He's a great coach. Number three. Three for Stu. For Kevin O'Connell. Billy? I'm going to put him at four. All right. I was going to put him at seven, but you guys talked me out of it. Really? There's no way. He doesn't have six better coaches on his list than Kevin O'Connell. It's impossible. That's why. He's going to give us a couple of first-year guys. Blind rankings. That's why they're blind. You can't see them. Next coach, number two.

Off this list, Sean McDermott, Buffalo Bills. Oh, wow. He's on the hot seat, I'll tell you that much. Seven. Seven, get it done. I'm going to put him at eight. Wow. I was just itching to give away a seven. No respect for Sean McDermott.

Sean McDermott is going to get fired every year. If he didn't have Josh Allen, he would have been fired five years ago. Fuentes, what do you want me to respect? He hasn't made a Super Bowl with a quarterback that most coaches would make a Super Bowl with, and he fires his coordinators every year. He's gotten further than Kevin O'Connell, and you guys are just praising Kevin O'Connell.

Kevin O'Connell has a Josh Allen? Yeah. Josh Allen. From the guys that only care about how many Super Bowls a guy wins. Okay, anyway. You know who's the happiest that Sean McDermott is there? It's Josh Allen. Of course. Because once he's gone, then it's like, Josh? Uh-huh. Anyway. Watson will stay forever. Let me ask you, Fuentes, if Sean McDermott were to get fired, how many coaches would want that job?

All of them. Yeah. Well, yeah. Because Kevin O'Connell were to get fired. How many people are lining up for that Vikings job? You got to see how good JJ McCarthy is. Let's do it this way. If Sean McDermott got fired, the first call the bills would make would be to Kevin O'Connell. Darn right. Third coach on this list. Washington Commanders Dan Quinn. Dan Quinn? Six. I'll put him seven. I'll go ahead. I thought you put McDermott at eight. I thought you put. I put McDermott at eight. All right.

Mikey, what was yours? I'll put Dan Quinn at eight. I don't like it. I should have put him at six, but I already said it. Next up, Tennessee Titans, Brian Callahan. Oh, God. Brian. Bless you. Nine. Yeah. Yeah, nine. All right. I'll put. I see what's happening to me. So do I. I see what's happening to me. I'm in trouble. I can't put him at six. Right. No. So, Steve, you said nine? All right. I need to see more from Brian Callahan. All right.

Yeah. Anything. I need to see anything for Brian Callahan. He's had one year, and he earned the first overall pick. Yeah. I need to see more from Brian Callahan, respectfully to all the Callahans out there. So here's the deal. He's at number nine on my list now, but if Cam Ward's good and we play this game again next year, and this is still part of the show, it's Mikey F wearing a mustache, then perhaps, perhaps. He could hop up to three. Right. If Cam Ward's good, Callahan will be top three. Exactly. Exactly.

That's right. It's an offseason game. Next up, D'Amico Ryan's Houston Texans. Ooh. I like him. I'll put him at five. Yeah. Uh, yeah. We're all going five, huh? I'm putting D'Amico at five. He feels like a five to me. Can I point out, because I've done this on a number of occasions, uh,

So if you're listening, you don't care. But visually, Mike Fuentes owns an assortment of Bass Pro Shop hats in different colors. And he sent me a picture. He has like five different color Bass Pro Shop hats. He's now wearing a knockoff Bass Pro Shop hat that seems to have a pigeon on it that says New York City for some reason. I really don't understand you loving this look, but every hat that you have is exactly the same. Wait till you see the one I got coming for the Panthers. You're going to love it.

I don't. Are you some sort of like big outdoorsman? Like, I don't know. Not even close. I like hiking, but that's about it. But not really. He also told me on an episode of Mystery Crate that he loves mountain vacations. And I was like, you do not look like anyone that goes hiking in mountains. And then he kind of clarified and was like, no, no, not like...

Hiking in mountains. He was saying like our trip to Phoenix when we had the watch party out there that that was a mountain vacation even though he'd spent no time in the mountains. That was the desert. Yeah, he just likes that there's mountains around. I like to have scenic views. We live in Florida so it's all flat here. Thank you. See, I like scenic views. I like it to be dry. I live in a swamp.

And then I can go to the beach any day I want. I can't go climb a mountain whenever I want. I live in the flattest area of the country. Can I just, you know, that's a thing that everybody says and we all say, like, I can go to the beach whenever I want. I don't think I've been to the beach here since 2019 easily. That's true. I feel like I'm going to melt if I go there. I have not been to Miami Beach since we left the Clevelander in any form or fashion. And even when we were going to work at the beach every day, I didn't.

actually go to the beach in miami for years right unless dan sets this to the ocean right it's true i don't go as much as i should for someone who lives here but i have been going more often lately and it's always an option that's why i don't go because it's too accessible so it's like you know got it yeah that's why you love mountain vacations correct because it's but you don't like the mountains you just like the idea of having the mountains accessible to you all jim harbaugh los angeles chargers grand canyon was a mountain range like no but they have mountains there

The point is it's different. Jim Harbaugh, Los Angeles Chargers. Now I'm stuck in a world where I think I need to put him at three. Why? Because I have three, eight, and ten left, and I don't think he's eight. I take Kevin O'Connell over Jim Harbaugh, so I'm going to put him at four. I'm going to put him at three.

Yeah. I'm putting Harbaugh at four. He also needs to show me something. You're right. And so does that quarterback, by the way. It's year two. Year two. Here's where you're going to get the best of Jim Harbaugh. We'll see. On name recognition, I think I would still rank Jim higher than John, which is crazy.

You're probably right. It's clearly John. I'm in a world where he's going to say John in the next four names and I'm going to have to rank John eight. Anyway, go on with your fake random things. Where'd you put Jim? I have four spots left. No, no, no. I'm saying I have two spots left. I have number one and number two still left. So I'm feeling pretty good. I put Jim Harbaugh at four. Where did Billy put him? I didn't hear him. At three. Three. Okay. Yeah. Ben Johnson, Chicago Bears.

It's a sexy name, but he also needs to show me something. It's really not a sexy name. It's a common name, Ben Johnson, but I understand what you're saying. No experience as a head coach. I think he's going to be a bad head coach. He has a coordinator face. Okay, wait a minute. So you were praising Kevin O'Connell.

for what he did with Sam Darnold, but you give Ben Johnson nothing for making Jared Goff a thing. He's got a better face. But he's not the head coach. He wasn't the head coach. It doesn't matter. Oh, yeah, because Dan Campbell knows quarterbacks. Yeah, you're right. You got it. You figured it out. I thought we were ranking head coaches, not offensive quarterbacks. I've never seen Alex Trebek get this frustrated with contestants. Jeez Louise. You give a name and he ranks it. Even though, if we're going to be honest, Trebek, respectfully to Trebek,

Seem like a dick, right? Like we could just, if we're going to be honest. Too soon? Yeah, I mean, he's been gone for five years now. Come on. I mean, did he not come off that way? Did you guys not feel that? Okay, fine. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to the Alex Trebek estate, please. All his fans, maybe. I mean.

If I was Alex Trebek, if I was Alex Trebek with all of my millions of dollars, I would probably buy like a ranch or like just a lot of like acreage. And I would call the ranch Trebekistan. So Ben Johnson, Billy, you've been working on that for a while or no. That was a thing. I buy a house in the mountains in Arizona. I have my own flag and everything of Trebekistan.

It would always be flying right because Alex Trebek was always right about everything. It would get revealed. Do you think the Dolphins head coach is going to be on here? Do you think McDaniel is going to be on here? Do you think the Jets head coach? I'm trying to figure out what to do with this coach. He's never coached before. Don't try. Don't try. Don't try and figure out what Fuentes does. Also, don't give Fuentes any ideas because we know he's up to shenanigans and he just hasn't pulled them out yet. So if you give him more ideas, he'll change it. And if you notice, we can't see him, so we don't know if he's writing on anything or not. Trebekistan's.

Where do they rank Ben Johnson in Trebekistan? Where do they rank him? I'm putting Ben Johnson at 10. I have him at 8.

Also not a sexy name. He's going to force me to put the Jets coach at like. Not a sexy name, and I looked him up respectfully. Not a sexy person either. Sorry, Ben Johnson. That's what Mikey was saying. Kevin O'Connell, he looks like a head coach. He's got a much better looking face. There's no question about it. That's not what I was saying, but okay. Next quarterback. You just hinted at him. Miami Dolphins very own. Sorry, head coach. Miami Dolphins very own Mike McDaniel. Knew it. Knew it.

I would have put him at eight had I switched Dan Quinn. Since I can't, I will put him at six. I'm okay. I'm being forced to put him ahead of Dan Quinn and Sean McDermott, but I'm okay with that. Like, yeah,

Like it might be Daniel had Josh Allen. Forget it. Yeah, probably not. Anyway, I have no choice. I'm in trouble here. I'm in trouble here. I am in deep, deep. I think we're all in the same trouble. We're all in the same. I only have one or two left. What spots do you have left, Mike?

1-4. Billy, what do you have left? 1-2. Yeah, I have 1-2. And they're going to be crap coaches. Here comes Brian Schottenheimer and Aaron Glenn. Yep, no doubt. All right, go ahead for what it does. Next off the list is Kansas City Chiefs Andy Reid. Yes, number one. Nice. That's fine.

Is there a better coach than Andy Reid that he could trot out there? I don't know, but I need to get that one out of the way. I'm relieved. Because if it's Nick Sirianni, I want him at number one. I love that guy. What? What about Tomlin? He's great. You're insane. Tomlin? John Harbaugh? I'm workshopping a take about Jalen Hurts being better than Patrick Mahomes. I'm just teasing. Tease for a future show. Keep working on it. Keep workshopping it. Where'd you put him, Billy? One or two? One. One for Andy, yeah.

Billy and Mikey both at one. I'm going to put him at two. Okay. You're going to be upset. And my number four, Stu Gatz is number one. I think he just mumbled, oh, you're going to be upset, which I don't think is good. Last coach, Seattle Seahawks, Mike McDonald. Oh, yeah. He's a number two if I've ever seen one. Yeah, that's my number two. I'm feeling good about that. Mikey, you have four left? I have them as the best coach in the NFL. I got them at four. I don't read.

Where'd you put Andy? At four? At two. Why? Who did you think was coming? I thought he was going to try to ask Sirianni or something. You held out for Nick Sirianni or John Horbaugh? That's crazy. Who was 11 on your list this week, Fuentes? The next name up was Todd Bowles. Oh, wow. He would have been followed by Jonathan Gannon.

Then Mike Tomlin, Kellan Moore, and then Dave Canales. I got to tell you, this Bulls guy lives in such a great world where no one cares about Tampa. No one cares about him. He is expressionless, and he'll never get fired. I like him. So do I. He does always have the same exact face on the sideline, no matter the situation. You don't know if he's winning or losing. Correct. You can't get a read on him. He's like wallpaper. Right. Yeah.

All right. Well, that was our blind rankings of coaches. All right. We have another blind ranking coming up, plus more Mike Lee. So I'm excited. And I think Billy and Mikey are going to embarrass me somehow. That's coming up next. Eczema isn't always obvious, but it's real. And so is the relief from Evglyss.

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And we're back. Yes, we are, Billy. What are we laughing at? Just you. You're in rare form today, man. I'm here, man. I'm just doing my thing. You know what it is? Football's getting close. That's what it is. Yeah, OTAs, you know? Yeah. You know me, I love going camping.

In the mountains with Fuentes? No, like football camps. I love to go to football camps. Big camping guy. You want to do a little training camp tour this year? What do you think? Where do you want to go?

I don't know. I was thinking maybe like Northeast on the next episode of God bless football, which you have to subscribe to find out. We'll plan our OTAs trip for 2025. I like the idea of like Jets, Giants, Buffalo, Philadelphia, that whole area. I think that's a good area for us. Can I tell you, since this is our last episode, an idea that I had for this show that never came to fruition is,

So I wanted to when we were going to Las Vegas and

um, there was a discussion for Las Vegas to have a road trip and we were going to stop and do like hits at like different places. Do you remember that conversation or no? Yes. Okay. We were driving from South Florida to Vegas, correct? Yeah. But we were like going up to like North Carolina and we were taking like a really strange route and it wasn't a true road trip because it was going to be like flights, uh,

And it was going to be a situation where we were flying people in and out and making certain stops like in one stop would have been like me and you and then like Lucy would have been at one or Jess or whatever. And we were like just going to be like flying people all around the country, making stops like all of these different places. Right.

And I came up with the idea that I thought was a great idea. And I thought it was a very cost effective idea because those things end up being like very pricey, especially when you have multiple flights, multiple people coming in and out and you have to rent different crews in different cities, whatever. I went on eBay and I looked up buying a used RV and

And I wanted to buy a used RV, like on behalf of whoever the sponsor was, like use their money to buy a used RV, use that RV to drive the entire time. And then when we got to Las Vegas at the live show, boom,

give away the RV. So we didn't have to figure out what to do with this old crappy used RV. Right. Just give it away to someone. Just give it away to a fan. Just have a raffle and give them the keys and be like, this is your problem. Now we used our sponsor money for this beat up RV. We had all these stops. Here you go. Congratulations. The 1985 RV. You guys figure it out. Weren't we trying to use the magic cruiser? Chemical toilet either. Uh,

We also were trying to use the what? We were trying to use the Madden Cruiser. I mean, the Madden Bus or something, right? So we did talk to the Madden son about using the Madden Bus for the Super Bowl, and that didn't come to fruition. And then this last year in New Orleans...

There was another RV road trip situation that they came up with that we didn't do. And in that situation, I was trying to do... New Orleans was close enough. What I was pitching was, let's do a segment of...

God bless football for the Monday episode. We'll do a road trip. And for the Monday episode, each segment will be in a different state. So like first segment, we'd be in Florida. Then we would be in Alabama and then like Mississippi and then Louisiana or however it plays out. Right. And I want to do it in four different states, each segment in a different state. And for that one, I found an even more cost effective solution, I thought, which was, well, hey, Davey,

David Sampson's always telling us about this RV that he got in this deal with the Marlins that he screwed over, you know, John Henry and he got his Marlins RV. Why don't we just ask him if we can use the RV? And then he canceled our show. Wow. That took a...

No, that didn't happen. No. I believe they reached out and they said they didn't know where it was. I don't know what happened with that situation. Samson misplaced an RV? I don't know. But it didn't end up working out. So...

Anyway, the RV tour still lives on. Maybe one day we'll go on an RV tour. Yes. Okay. Blind rankings or Mike more. Why don't we take an RV to the I think we have another blind ranking for guests here. Guests on the show at the Lark on the DraftKings Network. We're going to get to that in just a second. Let's take an RV three to training camp. Why not? You love camp RV three RV three. You like that? I know. We'll call it the RV three.

I don't know why, but we will. Football, that's why. Blind rankings. What are we doing here, Mikey? So Fuentes has to play along here. This is great. I like this. And the best part is he does not know most of these guests. Oh, good. All right. So explain to the audience what it is we're doing. We're blind ranking the guests in the history of this show? Of Meadowlark Media, God Bless Football. These are all guests that have appeared, I'll say, less than three times.

Less than three. Less than three times. Wow. Probably. I might be a little off. No regulars. Who did you leave off, just out of curiosity? Did you leave anyone off? Who missed the cut? Dwight Freeney missed the cut. Oh. Javon Kearse. Freeney's been good to us, man. Well, also the sense of a lot of frustration destroyed Freeney. That story will be told one day.

Go Joe missed the cut, huh? Yes, it will be told. All stories. Dwight Fried almost got you fired. Stop it. I almost got me fired. Okay. All right. You want the first one? Yes. Nitro. Oh, wow.

This is going to be... Nitro was on more than three times. I mean... I'm going to go with three with Nitro. One time felt like a thousand times. Yeah, it goes kind of along. Where'd you put him? I'm going to go with three.

What does? Where are you putting him? I'm going to put him down at eight because I just remember the time he asked, why don't I draft two kickers for fantasy football? Yeah. What does RB mean next to Saquon's name? Yeah, but he was coming on because he needed help with this stuff. Part of the charm. Yeah, we were trying to help bring people together. It is part of the charm, but I'm putting him low because I'm assuming that other greater guests may be coming. He said he was going to send StuGuts steroids in the mail. Never got them. But he never did. Never got them.

I put him at five for Nitro. All right. Next name on the list. Shirley Schefter. Oh, that's like a heavy hitter there. Yeah. Jeez. It's an all timer, man. What are we supposed to? How do we not? And also, I'm thinking this way. Well, that's what I'm saying. Is dad going to be on the list? Well, is that what's going to be? Yeah. Dad's foot. You know, I don't know. We can't have two chapters.

When you have two shifters, you don't have one shifter. Listen, I put it into Fuentes' randomizer. You didn't have such a thing. Just to remind the audience, Billy met Adam Schefter's mom on a cruise. In an elevator. Go listen to that episode. It was fantastic.

I'm going to put her at number two. Yeah, me too. I'm going to put her at number two. You also promised her we were going to get her a phone sponsorship. I know. And I take her to lunch in Boynton Beach somewhere. Yeah, we got to follow up on that. I will. I will. We got nothing but time now. We're retired. Yes. We'll take her in the RV3 with us. How about that? Oh, I like that. I'm going to put Shirley Schefter at four. No, you know what we should do with Shirley Schefter? We should take Shirley Schefter up with us to Mel Kiper's boat.

Oh, yes. Yes. She loves that. We have so many plans. I mean, we're going to get to all of them now. Well, that's really in retrospect at our run here. I think that that could summarize. We have so many plans. And that is on our tombstone. It was really our execution that kind of does it. The plans were there.

We're ideas, guys. Yeah. That's really what it is. We're ideas, guys. All right. Speaking of family of regulars. Oh, no. Matt Sims. Oh, Matt Sims. He was great, but I'm going to put him at one. I'm going to put him at nine. Okay. I'm going to put Matt Sims at... I'll put him at nine, too. That feels right for Matt Sims. That's not a shot at Matt Sims at all. He's good. No, he was only on one time, though. Nine is good for Matt Sims. Yeah. All right. All right.

Up next, fake Aaron Rodgers, Jake Owens. Oh, wow. That was a good one. Mm-hmm.

So I thought I was I was on the driving range at Lake Tahoe thinking I was speaking to Aaron Rodgers. I was speaking to a country music singer, Jake Owen, who thanked him for being our quarterback, who really just played along. He made the whole week for us at Lake Tahoe. I can't wait to go back to that place. I love it. I mean, it is. Those are mountains, by the way, Fontes. I can't.

I can't wait to go back there. I thought it was Aaron Rodgers. It wasn't. It was Jake Owen. They all made fun of me for the remainder of the weekend. It became a thing at Tahoe. Jake Owen was on the show. I'm going to put him at number one, man. What? Ten for me. It was a big... I put him at ten. It closed a loop for us that week. It was so important to get him on. And...

i'm probably putting him too high i'm over here your joke about missing who he was is better than him so like it's he's a 10. yeah i put him at 10 too also because i was on vacation and i missed the interview so all right i have no frame of reference i'm gonna put him next name on the list brandon seiler oh scott saw he should be number one he was great

You do not remember him. What do you mean? Siler was on. He made picks with Kay Funk. He had a book to promote. I think he went 0-5. I don't know. I'm going to put Siler at 7. All right. Listen, here's what I do know, Billy. I don't want to piss off Brandon Siler. That is true. That is true.

I'm going to put him at seven. I'll piss him off. He's going to seven. I had a, I had, I had a share bear calling me on a Sunday because he was in Miami with Siler at the Mondrian and they were calling me to see if I wanted to come to the pool. And I was like, it's Sunday. I have two children. I cannot go to the pool. Hey buddy, just want to see if you want to come to the pool. Hey Billy, what'd you do yesterday? I'll go to the pool with Kay Funk and Brandon Siler.

Up next. Oh, Cher Bear. Oh, Cher Bear. Sorry. Kayfunk would have showed up. Oh, I'm sure he was there. He's wondering why he wasn't invited. No protection on whatsoever, Kayfunk.

Up next, everybody's favorite heating and air conditioning person. Oh, Lacey. She was great. Lacey's a two. Yeah, I believe I put Shirley Schefter at two. Yeah, Lacey's a two. What a show. That was a classic. That was a classic.

It's too bad she moved to Canada and got married, huh? Subscribe, rate, and review. Yes. You went from cooling to heating. Yeah. Oh, God. Number three for me. She was a bartender who owned an air conditioning company. Yeah. I'm putting her at three. Yeah. Puts a smile on my face. Up next, the Old Spice guy. Oh, Old Spice guy. This is the last Super Bowl just a few months ago. We had him twice. Yeah, double appearance.

He was so good, Billy. Yeah, I have him at six.

Really? Yeah, he was good, but these names have all been good, except Matt Sims. These names have all been good so far. There's still a few more. Don't you want one of the Sims to like you? I mean, no. Nah. It's better that way. I put the Old Spice guy at one because he made my job easy that week. Just putting that guy in both episodes. Hey, Tony's behind you. Yeah, how about that?

Up next. Well, hold on. What was the last name? The Old Spice Guy. I'll put the Old Spice Guy at one. You put three people at one already. You put somebody else at one. You put Jake Owen at one. I took him out. I put him at four. Okay. Old Spice Guy's at one. Come on. All right. I'll put him at six. I don't want to break the fourth wall here, but now that we're just telling truths today...

Old Spice guy was wandering around radio row with a cane and we couldn't figure out if it was a bit or not. And then the second day that we saw him, we realized, oh no, he just uses a cane. Yes. Which is not exactly how you picture the Old Spice guy, but he's a man with a cane. He is. But then he opens up that mouth and it's like, oh yeah, magical. It's unbelievable. All right. So I have three slots left, right? I have one, eight and 10. I'm doomed. All right. Up next. Cozy Coleman.

- Forgot about it. - Buffy Coleman. - I'll put him at that. - Cozy's at eight. - Six. - Six? - Cozy's at eight. - That's all I got left. - What do you have left, Stu? - Oh, how's it feel, Fuentes? - Yeah, four and a five. - What do you got left, Stu? - I have, after Cozy? - Yes. - I have eight and one. - I'm sad. I have someone I want to be on this list that I don't think will be. - Up next, Gordy Gronk's Uber driver.

Oh, one. One. Did he go 5-0? Yeah. Yeah. And we couldn't find him. And we couldn't find him again. We couldn't find him again. Gordy Zuber driver's number one guest of all time we had. Five. Got one name left. Yeah. I'm sad. I wanted a name that I don't think is going to be on here. I'm putting Gordy Zuber driver at 1-2. All right. All right. Last one. Spags.

Oh, no. Spags. Damn you. Damn you. Damn you. It was a randomizer. It was a randomizer. We had Spags in studio. It was fantastic. A little Fuentes randomizer. Blossoming friendship. Man, we could go on a cruise with Spags also. Spags would love to go on a cruise. Hell yeah. Yeah. I have Spags at five. That's not who I was expecting. I had two names that I was hoping would be on the list that were not on the list. First name I was hoping would be on the list, Casper.

Captain Lee didn't make the cut. Yeah, he would have been top. I wasn't on that episode. Top three for me, Captain Lee. Really? He was on twice, I think. Yeah, we had him on twice. One time on God Bless Football, one time on Stupidity. And the other one that we have on regularly that I was hoping would be on this list was Roslyn, the

The Witch. Oh, The Witch. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, there's a reason she's not on the list. Well, okay. So now that we're sharing stories with Stugatz in the audience, Stugatz, I have a confession that I need to share with you. This is the part of the show where you guys are going to embarrass me, right? No, we're not going to embarrass you. It's something that you need to know. Maybe we do this on the other side. We found out about a year ago. When we come back, a story that we found out.

about Rosalind the witch. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Knowing you could be saving money for the things you really want is a great feeling. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with a personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings, and eligibility vary by state. ♪

Stugatz, Mike Yeh, Mike Fuentes, audience, this is it, this is our last segment here on The Lark, on DraftKings Network for this run of God Bless Football. Before we get sappy, I want to just tell you the quick story here that I wanted to tell you about Rosalind the Witch. So Rosalind the Witch is someone that you knew back all the way to your weekend observation show that you would do.

at ESPN Radio and you had Roslyn come on. And Roslyn, I think, first made an appearance when the Jets had... It was the draft lottery or they had the number one pick or something, right? So you had a bunch of different people come on. Priestess Roslyn way back when. I think it was the Knicks. The Knicks, yeah. Sorry, I said the Jets. I meant the Knicks. So Priestess Roslyn...

would then come on and be on around Halloween or whenever we needed, you know, different things. She was a Halloween staple for us. Yeah, but we needed it. Or if we needed, you know, Priestess Rosalind to ever talk to people from beyond whatever, we'd have Priestess Rosalind come on or cast spells on people or whatever. Right. Then there may have been a situation where Mikey C dated her, but that was unclear whether or not there was a relationship there.

So about a year ago, we reached out to Priestess Roslyn to have Priestess Roslyn come on, I believe because we were trying to do a seance and wanted to reach out to Don Shula. Yes, with Greg Cody. Yeah, with Greg Cody. And Mikey was our point of contact on that situation, and he reached out to Priestess Roslyn and then shared devastating news with me based on the call that he had with Priestess Roslyn.

Wow. Mikey, should I tell him or do you want to tell him? I don't know if I can say it. I think you have to say it. So...

It turns out, Stugatz, Priestess Rosalyn was not a priestess. Priestess Rosalyn was the PR person that booked the real priestess, and the real priestess backed out of the initial interview ten minutes before. So Priestess Rosalyn, as we knew her, was the PR person for an actual witch.

who instead of canceling, pretended to be a witch. And then for multiple years, kept coming on the show, pretending to be a witch for us because she was so embarrassed by the fact that she pretended to be a witch the first time. So everything she told us about covens and all of that stuff was all made up. She was a PR person who eventually felt guilty and came clean. And that will do it for Metalarks. God bless football.

she wasn't a witch she faked it she faked it one time and couldn't tell us so she kept faking it for years my kind of way that is that is not

Perfect for this show. I don't know what it is. Our witch was never a witch. The real witch bailed and the PR person pretended to be a witch for years and was just making stuff up the entire time.

Told her she was going to Salem for the weekend. All of that made up says a niece that had the gift. All of it made up. She's probably saying, like, I can't believe this is my life. I'm a media relations person for an actual witch. Yeah. Who's flaky. And now I have to pretend to be a witch.

I got to tell it. We should hire her. I mean, the effort she made. I believe that that is your actual first reaction. And I believe that that is the best play. Best move. Oh, my God. Thank you for telling me that. Yeah. What an odd way to end the show. It really was.

And now this isn't even on TV. This is just us talking. We could put this on audio or whatever. So that was that. Priestess Rosalind apparently was the fake priestess. You got to give her credit, though, right? For sinking into the character out of guilt. Yeah, she did a good job. So the real witch just flaked out, didn't want to do it? Apparently. Bailed last minute. Dan Stanzik saw her hit.

When she did a hit for, I think, local New York news talking about the Knicks and booked her thinking that he was booking the Priestess. Right. And since then...

She became part of weekend observations and then stupidity and even God bless football. Yeah, I'm devastated. It is. It is. I've never felt so lied to in my life. Yeah. What anymore? At the same time, it kind of made me like her more. Oh, of course. Yeah. I mean, it was bad news because we lost what we thought was a real witch, but.

He gained one of us, a friend. I wonder if a real witch was listening and was like, this girl's totally faking it. Yeah, probably. These guys think they're speaking to a witch. This isn't a witch. She doesn't know what she's talking about. Rosalind, that's not even a real name. Yeah.

What? Well, hold on. No, it goes deeper than that because if you remember, she also created a whole Twitter account and everything for Priestess Roslyn. So she went and created an entire social media identity about bringing a priestess that was all just a cover for some reason. And I don't even...

I wonder why she felt the need to go that deep on it, because no one would have needed to follow her. Right. Social media from one appearance. Right. If she just said, hey, the witch can't do it. Stanzik would have been like, OK, or she just did it. And that was it. And then the next time you called like, oh, no, sorry, wrong number, whatever. But no, she was committed to this. Yeah.

This is our kind of PR person, Billy. I'm telling you, listen, Billy and I are going to get into business, hopefully together. We're going to do some shows together moving forward. And I'm telling you, Roslyn, or the person I thought was Roslyn, will be running said business, okay? Because that's the kind of person you need, Billy. Someone who's willing to do anything. Anything.

including acting like a witch when she's not. Imagine what she'd do for us. It was odd. Any final thoughts here as we wrap up or anything? You got a more Mike Lee or anything? Oh yeah, you want to do a more Mike Lee? No? I'll have plenty of thoughts, Billy, and I'll have plenty of days. I'll have plenty of thoughts and plenty of days to share my new thoughts. I'm kind of just petering out here at the end.

Can we just like... I want to thank the fans, by the way, for listening to us for four years. We started this show...

stu gotts and i on a friday because our company did not have a football show and we thought that we should so we just started doing it because she would take that lane right and we we started doing a show and we called it god bless football and once it started uh they couldn't say no so we just kept doing it and then uh over the years it grew and we won podcast awards because of fan voting

entirely because of fan voting. So thank you guys for kind of listening over the years for voting for us, getting us these awards that we got that again, we're fan voting. Our numbers were really, really good over the years and you guys listening and downloading, showing up to the live events,

All of that was it was really cool and it was really fun. And it's something we were talking about before the show that when we sat down that first week four years ago, we never would have thought we'd still be doing that same show four years later. So just thank you guys for listening. Thanks to DraftKings for supporting us over the years. Jay and Mia and Ashley and

Freeze and Feldman and you know hundreds of people over there dozens of people that supported us over the years in this run and now you know this portion is done and We're not so you know we're figuring out what the next step is where we will be once we have that information We'll pass it along to you, but we really want to thank you guys for

for all of the years of listening to us and tweeting at us interacting with us voting for us showing up at the events all of that stuff it's it's been really fun and we've made you know friends along the way not just with fans but like we still are texting with mojo and mike rollis and those people during random weekends of you know whatever and gordy and k-funk were never gonna lose so it's

It's been a fun ride. We met Adam Schefter's mom because of this show. Yes. Well, you met her on a cruise. I met her on a cruise, but we spoke to her and got to know her and Jeff, I think, was his dad's name on the show. Yes. It's a weird show, and we've had a lot of fun doing it. And the hope is that this continues just like...

Because that's business. It is what it is. We have fun doing it, though. It's a celebration of football. That's what it is. It's a celebration of the sport that all of us have fallen in love with. Just a couple more people to thank. Chris Sims, Mike Golick, who have been great to us over the four years, joined us just about every single week. Incredible. Mojo, Kay Funk, all those guys. Chris Gronkowski as well. Austin Eckler for a couple years. Lucy. Yep.

Oh, yeah, of course. How can we forget? Yeah, we're never going to mention everyone. Right. Well, I thank you to DraftKings because DraftKings has been a great partner. Jay Donahue has been great to us. Everyone at DraftKings, Ashley has been super helpful with this show. Billy, most importantly, we're smart guys. This show is going to continue. The show is very, very popular. Subscribe, rate and review, please. Thank you to Smirnoff because Smirnoff has supported this money with their dollars for many, many years.

years and we appreciate it they've been great not good partners great partners yeah and whenever we have events in other cities those events are packed and those events are tight and done well so thank you to smeared off man and mikey a and fuentes and well less to a lesser extent take it back yeah danny b yeah danny b sometimes yeah on that trips and uh everyone juju went on trips with us

to uh super bowls yeah and uh how does this end how does like an acceptance speech end it ends tony's there he just wants us yeah i got the i got a good ending and gq also thank you to gq and robert robert sometimes is there on the trip robert oh i love bobby robert yeah bob we call him bobby and

Anyone else? Jenny too. Jenny. Do you want to thank Jenny? Let's thank everyone except David Samson. God bless football. Medium, medium, rare, medium. Well,

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