Local Hour: Hygiene Vigilantism
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This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugatz Podcast. ♪

Today's episode is sponsored by DraftKings. Stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show. DraftKings, the crown is yours. I'm surrounded by my friends on a Friday. Everyone bailed. This is it. This is what happens after a week.

Friday comes. I think Friday's the most important show of the week, personally, because people tend to not take it seriously. People tend to be ready for Loverboy. They're working for the weekend. I happen to think that people want... Are we... Can we be serious here? We're supposed to do a show. I got no one around me. Everything's happening in my ear. I have so many things I need to get to. You know what? Screw it, Billy. I'm just starting. I appreciate that you're here. I got Tony and Juju and Billy and Lucy and Jeremy.

I'm thankful for the whole week we had. And I don't love the fact that yesterday I got a text from Pablo and from Dominique celebrating the week. Very thankful about the week, appreciative of the week. And my view was that's like premature celebration. It's like winning the third game of a series and the whole day yesterday. We won 4-0. We swept. No, no. We need to win today. Well, they were done.

But it doesn't matter that they're done. That's like saying the starting pitcher of game three wins to go up 3-0, and that means you're done. You have to win four. I have a question for you. How are you more comfortable doing a show? Because you do a show by yourself every day. Do you like that, or you like kind of having the group do the show with you? Well, you are the group. So I love both.

I love doing, I just finished Nothing Personal, so you guys, do you hear when I'm doing the show in the mornings? - Yeah. - So I do it from 8:00 to 8:50 every morning, and then I finish, and then we start here. And it's such a big difference. I love the sparring partners, I love being called out, because of course when you're doing Nothing Personal,

You're talking into the void except for coca yelling in my ear, you know, wrong and or you got that wrong or did that wrong. And people here on Dan show have no problem, including Dan, who is across the ocean, who is making sure to get in my ear. I'd be surprised if you didn't have him particularly dialed in, worried about a Friday show with just us here.

Do you feel a little bit as though that we can do anything because Dan's gone, Pablo's gone, Dominique's gone? Fridays always feel that way. Yeah. Why? There's an energy to Friday because we're not doing quite as many segments as we normally do for a full show. Normally, Dan and Stugatz aren't here on Fridays, so it's just sort of shipping container-led or, you know, you're here or some other special guest, whether that's Amin.

And so it's kind of like substitute teacher energy. That's always kind of the vibe on Friday in a good way, though, because my flight is always at 12. Yeah, that's also true. It just brings it brings a fun kind of frantic and interesting energy to it. I don't know. I don't know why substitute teachers get such a bad rap. I was so mean. What's the worst thing that you all did to your substitute teachers? Because I happen to remember the worst thing that I did to mine.

I don't have a worse thing that we did to a substitute teacher. Not surprisingly, I was an amazing student. I had a worse thing a teacher has done and it's lived in my brain forever. And I will never forget the time that we were in school and we were like taking a test and I went up to ask a question and my teacher was shaving her legs behind her desk. No way.

Yep. Did she get fired? No, she was so old. She probably had tenure. She was really a mean lady. She did not give one shit about anything. And Miss Spencer, that's a common last name, so I can say it, just sat there and shaved her legs behind the desk. Is she alive still? She was really old. And this was like 15 years ago. I had a middle school teacher that clipped her toenails during class one time, and it was one of the grossest things. It was truly...

And I forget what the name of the class was, but it was essentially like, was it health? Oh, it was critical thinking. It was the critical thinking class. And that was not a critical thinking type of move. I had a terrible fight with my girlfriend over this. I do not agree with clipping anything other than over a toilet or a garbage can.

It seems to me a very simple rule. I don't understand why there'd ever be a violation of that rule. - I agree with you actually. - Right, 100%. - But apparently, there are people who feel they can clip away. I once saw someone clipping at an airport. - Nah, they should be locked up. - If I were bigger, I have a top five list in my head of things that I wish I, that I would do if I were a bigger person. - So wait a second, you're thinking of doing like hygiene vigilantism? - Yes.

1000%. I'd have to be your size. So if you were my size, you'd be the Batman of hygiene. There is not one chance I would allow someone to clip their toenails in an airport lounge. Well, what would you do just because you're bigger? You would like cause problems or it would just be like you'd be physically menacing. Well, it'd be menacing. I'm not very menacing. Just puff out your chest a little bit. 65, a buck 32. You're not menacing. I can't go up to someone. And I also view that I can't go up to someone smaller than I.

because I don't have the menacing credibility. So therefore I can't do it. Even if I were your size, Billy, I would do it. And it's not just toenails. I would do it. And there are certain times that I still do it, but only when I'm with bigger people. So I have the guts. I have to have backup. I have to have like bodyguards, bigger friends, which is almost everybody, but there are bigger people who just happen to be with me. When people drop litter on the street,

What I don't do anymore because of all the violence is I have gone up to cars when people throw stuff out of their car window. If I catch them at a light, I used to before there was a risk of being shot, I would say, excuse me, you dropped garbage on the street.

But now I don't do it anymore. You would get out of your car and go – It's a window roll. Oh, okay. It's a window roll. Okay, so you would pull up in the lane next to somebody because I'm envisioning you parked behind someone. At a red light? At a red light, getting out of your car, walking up and knocking on the window and saying, excuse me, sir or madam, you just dropped this Cheetos bag on the floor. I have done that in a grocery store parking lot.

In a Publix parking lot, when someone left a cart in the way of a car and it starts rolling and they ignore it, I have had the guts. Because I feel like even large people, maybe armed, when they're protecting milk and eggs, they don't want to delay getting back in the Florida heat to the fridge. So I have an ongoing feud that this person is unaware of with someone that lives in my neighborhood. And I think I know who this person is.

And there's a person, so when I walk my dogs around the neighborhood, I will go and I have the little baggies, right? And that's not something that everybody does. And that's not common in every area, right? But like I have been conditioned with these dogs because the apartment that I lived at before had like the dog bags and it was like very, you know, not that I was just walking around leaving dog crap everywhere anyways. But like since I've had my dogs, I've been conditioned this is the right way to do. This is the correct way to behave with a dog.

So there's a dog that always poops right near my mailbox.

So it's like there's grass by the mailbox, the mailbox is by the curb, and there's poop there regularly. And if I don't look down, I'll step in the poop. Or if, you know, my mother-in-law comes over, sometimes she'll park there and like that's where she'll step and there's poop there. So I've come up with this plan and I haven't executed it yet. And it's kind of along the lines of what you're thinking because like I don't want to get shot, like not high on my list of things that I want to do.

But I want this to stop. So I was thinking of maybe getting like one of those deer cam things and putting it like in a tree, right? Facing the area where it is. To catch the dog. To catch the person, not the dog. I mean, the dog doesn't know any better, right? The dog's just doing what dogs do. But I want to catch the person. And this is where I need help. This is the next step that I've come up with that I don't think is necessarily the best way to handle this situation.

I want to catch the person and then I want to print a picture of me catching the person. And I want to post it on my mailbox. And I want to put on the paper, pick up your shit, asshole. But I feel like that's a little bit much and then that will lead to me getting shot. And also, I'm then...

They know where I live. So then this could be a lot worse. Like when you do something confrontational, I feel like one of the big keys is people not knowing where you live. Because if they know where you live, then it's a lot worse. I just don't agree that it's confrontational when people are crapping on your property.

Well, I mean, I could use nicer words, obviously. But no, I'm saying that that is something I think that that's a normal thing to say to a neighbor. It's not like turn your music down at 7 p.m. when you're having a small get together, something that someone does every day. Asking a dog not to crap on your lawn. Am I missing something? Well, is that not a very normal neighborly thing to do? Look, I don't fault the dog, right? If the dog is going to go there, OK, but can you pick it up? Yeah.

up and like not just leave it there and I'm pretty sure I know exactly who this is but I don't want to be confrontational also the person is a little bit older so like I don't want to also be confrontational in case I spook this person too much and then I'm liable for something what about having your wife do it

Oh, I mean, that's usually my go-to for every confrontation I have. It's like she will handle those situations. So much so that, like, I will say, please don't have these confrontations because this will make the situation a lot worse than it needs to be. Like, please don't confront that person. Now, if it's the way my meal is cooked or something, that's okay. That's a private confrontation. Yeah, no, but I also, like, I will eat the wrong meal all the time. Or if it's cooked the wrong way, all the time. I will never send anything back. I've never sent anything back. Never, ever. Never.

And like we've talked about I think on Mystery Crate before, we're like, I will take things to go that I didn't like just because I feel the shame of leaving it behind. And I don't want to insult the person. It could be a bad meal and I will ask for a to-go box and then I'll take it with me home and throw it away at home just so that they don't see it. Or I do the old move, and again, we're in reruns here, but I'll do the old move where I pretend that I forgot the box and it stays on the table. Like, whoopsie daisy, I meant to take this home, it was so delish.

I know I'm playing Monday morning quarterback right here, but I feel like it was a risk for being shot your whole life, picking up people's trash, taking it to the window. I don't know if it was the 60s or the 70s when you grew up, but Pistols was real out the whole time. But, Billy, I think just put a sign on your mailbox that says –

that says, do not crap on my lawn. You're on camera. Yeah, there's people in my neighborhood that have that. That say, don't pee on my lawn or don't whatever. Do they get peed on their lawn? I walk faster past those houses, to be honest with you. You should just put really passive-aggressive signs up. Yeah, but then my house also looks really crazy. I have signs all over my house, folks.

I admit it. You do? Inside my house. I have two particular ones that are my favorite. One is that I have a piece of art that is relatively close to the top of a piece of furniture, and it's upon the entrance to the house, and people tend, for whatever reason, which I'll never understand, they walk into your house and they feel like they can put their bag on the first ledge they see. Not sure that that is proper. You put it on the floor, or you ask, where may I put my bag?

So I have a sign that says, please do not leave objects on this surface because I don't want... Like you're at a museum. So it's that. What kind of bags they be bringing to your house, bro? People bring purses or they bring beach bags or whatever they're bringing. I just don't want anything because there is a risk if you grab the bag that you could stick a finger through a piece of art.

But that's one. The one that bothers me the most. What kind of art is it that you can put your finger through it? Smithsonian? Canvas. Any oil on canvas, you can put a finger through. Or like dent it. Well, sometimes it can dent or put it through. That's a peek into your life. That's how rich you are. No, I didn't say it was good art. I just said it's any art. David just likes protecting art. Good art, bad art. I protect art. But the other thing I protect is electricity usage. I like lights being turned off.

I don't like when people leave lights on when they go outside or when they're guests of your house. Drives me crazy when guests go out to dinner and leave the lights on in the guest room. So I'm constantly reminding people with a sign, please turn lights off when leaving the room. So every switch has one? What do you mean with a sign? Like all your light switches have signs? No, no, upon the entrance to the room. Are you like running a bed and breakfast? Do you have like rules in the different rooms? So I am a great host actually.

Because when people come to my place, I show them the refrigerator, the food, do whatever you want. The only rule is don't ask me for anything. I don't want to do anything. I'm not cooking for you. I'm not getting you stuff. You're allowed to touch and do whatever you want. But just follow the simple rules. The Wi-Fi password is a very easy one, which I'm happy to give publicly. It's keepitclean.

Very normal. Any caps in there or no? I'm not going to tell you. But just keep it. No. Yes. Just keep the house clean.

And then the sign in the gym is my last one. That's not a gym, I have a treadmill. People take a little fridge that I got on Amazon for 40 bucks. And have you ever had a fridge where you just close it, but then it opens up a little bit so it doesn't fully close? Yeah, of course. Like if you do it too hard or whatever. And then all of a sudden your stuff isn't cold. And I go down to work out and the drinks I want aren't cold. So I have a sign that says, please make sure refrigerator door is closed.

Damn, bruh. If I come to your house, I'll be mad as hell. No, I think people have fun. I've never had a complaint because what I've heard most is people love understanding expectations. What is expected of me as a guest of your home?

What is it? I want to be a good guest. Most people want to be a good guest and they don't want to be put in a position where they don't know what the host wants. Are you someone who gets frustrated if someone doesn't turn off a light leaving a room momentarily? So like, for example, if I was staying in the guest room,

But I had to walk out to go down to the living room for some sort of reason. We're having a conversation, and I know I'm going to be back in 10, 15 minutes. No problem. I'm talking when you're going out to dinner. Leaving for the night. Leaving for the night. Or leaving for the day. That's respectable. What about when someone you know comes to your house and brushes their teeth, and they don't turn the water off while they brush their teeth? I don't either. What kind of wrath?

I don't either. Oh, well. And that's too bad because I'm lucky enough to have traveled around places where water is not something that is taken for granted. And for whatever reason, I need to leave the water running because I have a particular need to rinse the brush, let's say every 15 strokes. And I don't want to have to keep turning it on or off.

What do these signs look like? Like, did you print them on a printer? Are they laminated? Were they professionally made? You can get them online. I searched direction signs for your house online.

Customizable. They're customizable signs. It may be called customizable signs. Are they like a special font, special color? I have different fonts for each of the different signs. Why? Because I believe, again, welcome to my brain, I think people respond to block font in a little more serious way than like Times font or italicized font. Or like a little cursive. I want a cursive. Papyrus. People may not know what that is.

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Don Levitard. Oh, I like firing people. So I take the opportunity to fire whenever I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to help them out and try to point out what they did wrong. But in this case, the employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing, but I had it done within moments of discovery. I'm just like, I like firing.

This is the Dan Levatard Show with the Stoogats.

You know, speaking of pirates, Paul Skeens, 11 Ks yesterday. Holy good, bro. I thought he was going to slow down. Did you think that he shouldn't have been taken out of the game? I mean, I think let the boy cook at it. If you're going to put him out there, you're the pirates. You're not going nowhere. I think you should start ramping him down. I think they should. I like it. They're in the wild card race on the periphery, but they're not going anywhere. The thing is, Paul is in Tommy John race, but peripherally.

I didn't have time to ask for the Derek Shelton video. So I don't know if we have it. Derek Shelton met the media, he's the manager of the Pirates, and he gave the lamest BS excuse about why Skeens was out. He said, "Oh, we had eyes on him, he looked tired."

It wasn't pitch count. I don't know why anyone's saying pitch count. Coincidence is it was 99 pitches. We took him out because he was tired. We've never seen it, but he looked tired to us. He threw 120 or more pitches in three out of his four starts during their run to the College World Series. He's a horse. He's a guy who can absolutely go over 100 pitches. And I understand pitch count.

I understand the way that we baby arms now, but Paul Skeens is one of those guys physically who seems to be built for the long haul. And inevitably, like all of these guys who throw that hard, there will be some sort of injury somewhere down the line, but it's just so frustrating. Like,

The no-hitter or the perfect game as a concept, the fact that baseball gets in its own way in having these special moments...

It's infuriating. It made me angry. I hate pitchers getting removed in the middle of no-haters. I mean, I hate Dave Roberts for that reason because he does it all the time. I hated Don Mattingly for doing it constantly. It's not their decision. No, I hate him anyways. I hate when you take out the pitcher. I hate the people who make the decision. Eh, who do I hate? Do I hate you? Was it you? Did you do this? We had strict pitch counts. Well, okay, let me ask you because you're in a unique position, right?

You have these strict pitch counts. You want to protect the asset, right? But also you have you're preventing a moment that you could market and capitalize off of. So how do you weigh those options in your position? It's a major problem. And the problem is that as president of the team, I wanted the no hitter.

because I'm collecting ticket stubs. I'm ready to sell the ticket stubs. I'm having the players sign all the bases and balls. We're taking all the game-use balls. You know when after every pitch the catcher throws the ball away? We're getting those. We're getting them authenticated. We'll get the pitcher to sign them, and we've got things that we can auction off on MLB.com or put in our team store.

But the GM has already made the decision and convinced the owner that if you let this guy go, you're going to have a problem. And my view is that I want to look at the game. But the decisions are made before the game starts. So like yesterday, Skeens was fine. He looked great. I had no issue with him at all. He got through the seventh inning in, what was it, six pitches? It's amazing that...

We don't seem to take high-stress innings into account. Like, pitch count— All the time you have to take that into account, but now analytics does not worry about that. Why? Because stress innings are based on this, your eye. And analytics says, no, we're not interested in that. It's infuriating the way that we treat arms in Major League Baseball now because it's obvious— It ain't working. Right. The more—

It's a structural issue that dates all the way down to kids playing travel baseball. But by babying arms all the way through, you're only making this worse. You're only making your injury epidemic worse because you baby these arms and yet.

You tell your pitchers to hunt for velocity. And so those are sort of counterproductive things when it comes to injuries. And so you treat these guys like they're incapable of going deep into games. But every pitcher and every pitcher's pitch count is different based off what their velocity is, what their legs are. It's infuriating. You know, the players never liked when I talked about this stuff because I wasn't a player.

Tony, did you ever think that anyone could take care of your body better than you or know your body better than you? I think it depends, too. Like if you're injured or oft injured that you have something that you're working back from. Like I've worked back from a knee injury where I felt like, oh, did I have the step that I had prior to the surgery or whatever? So for me, that was always difficult because you always know your body. But I think there's a differentiation when you have injuries.

something that could get injured or something that was already injured, right? Like, if you look at these guys' arms, they're okay until they aren't. Dave, you know more than anybody. It's like that one pitch until forearm tightness, elbow tightness, tricep tightness, it can be one pitch away. So when you look at guys that were built to look like horses and throw nine innings, look at Strasburg. Strasburg was a horse. He was coming out of San Diego State, I think, or whatever, and he looked amazing. And then all of a sudden, his career derailed because one thing after another after another. And it's like...

It's having a Lamborghini, a Ferrari, or a super specialized car that you take one screw a little loose and the entire car kind of gets messed up. Do you think the All-Star game was at play here?

No, he was going to start the All-Star Game either way. So had he gone forward? He just had to get through the game. My opinion, this hasn't been made public, so I have no idea. He'll probably start. My opinion is that he had to get through the game healthy, and he did get through the start healthy, and then they will announce him as the starter. They have to. It makes perfect sense. We all want to watch him, and I assume they make the lineup. The manager of the All-Star Game said yesterday he's evaluating the

So red or black font on these signs?

It's blue background with white font for the one in the- What color are your walls? Bruh, breaking news, bruh. We just found a picture of your damn living room. Somebody sent a candid camera picture, bruh. This is crazy hell, man. Come on, bruh. You gotta take some of them down. Do not watch.

Don't look outside, bro. You can't even peek out the window. I'm the opposite of that. I have every streaming service available in every guest room, and every bathroom is full of every condiment you could ever need. From combs. Are you eating in your bathroom? Condiment. What's the word for I have condiments?

Advil, Tylenol, tampons, dental floss, combs, toothbrush, toothpaste. I think we call that accoutrement. Accoutrement? Is your house like an Airbnb when you're out there? No, I do not allow strangers in the house. Really? Ever. There will never be an Airbnb. Me? Are you joking? I don't know. What, do you put my stuff in a closet? So your signs are blue. What color are your walls? White. Hmm.

Seems like it stands out. Toiletries? Is that maybe the word you're looking for? Toiletries. But I don't view Advil and Tylenol as toiletries. Yeah, well, that's different. That's medicine, I guess. But I also have Gaviscon in every room. I know what Gaviscon is, but my happy birthday, Lucy's birthday, praise God, my sister doesn't know what that means. Happy birthday to her. I don't care. Good luck.

That's so mean. I care. I hate that sound. I think Gaviscon's the guy that Belle was like, was going after Belle in Beauty and the Beast. Oh yeah! Gaviscon is just a better Tom. Yeah, he wore the tie. Why don't you like your birthday? Just don't. Yeah. Can you, was that, did you not have good parties when you were nine? I never really had birthday parties. My birthday was in the middle of the summer, so everyone was out of town. My dad usually made us go to Des Moines for my birthday. Nice. No, not nice. Nice.

It was not the most fun birthday. So I just, I've never really cared for it. It's not anything like getting older. I don't really care about that. Just not a birthday gal. Are you going to be with your friends tonight? I don't have any friends. Are you going to be with your coworkers tonight? No. Lucy, I consider you a friend. I think you are a great friend. You came to Atlanta, me, you and Rose hung out, and I feel like we made a bond. We did.

and our matching sweatshirts. You feel me? Us being kind of new here and not necessarily Miamians, we shared a couple of great conversations, so I honor our friendship, and I wish you nothing but the best, sis, every day. Thank you, Juju. I love you, but Jess is out of town, so I'm actually watching Willow. What?

- So it's a Lucy and Lilo day. - Awesome. You are a good person. I wouldn't watch someone's dog for a gazillion dollars. As a matter of fact, there are two rules. Since you're talking about other rules at the house, I do have two other rules.

No kids, no pets. No kids? Why do kids gotta catch a stray? I just don't want kids in the house. Can your kids come over? They're not kids. Okay. Oh, it's funny. You think kids could mean like 30-year-olds. No, I don't know. No, I meant kids like... You got swings up in the house? What you got going on in there, man? I just don't want kids around. Kids touch stuff. I don't want anyone touching stuff. And kids make mess.

I also have a very bad habit, my last one that I'll mention, is I tend to vacuum while people are still eating as a way to let them know that they're dropping crumbs on the floor and it's driving me crazy. Why does anyone stay at your house? Because we have fun. Do we? We do, we really do. So I'm painting it as though it's not fun, but it really is. You have a pool in the back or what? There is. There is. Not allowed in it, but... No, no, totally allowed. Shower first. How about after?

Shower after? Generally, you're supposed to. Doesn't everybody shower? If you have a couple staying with you, can they get intimate in your house? They do, and it can be heard. It can be heard? Yes. Wow. So the way houses are built, the walls are not necessarily thick. I immediately regret this question. Why? Out of everything that happened this week, you're going to regret hearing some oohs and aahs? Given everything Lucy was not here for.

But did you, were you happy with the week? I actually was moving this week, so I did not have a chance to listen to the show. So your girl's been packing and packing and packing. Are you watching Willow in a new place? No, I'm staying at Jess's place, and I'm watching Willow there. Do you get to stay in her bedroom? Yeah, if I want to. She has two beds, so I slept in,

Like Ricky Ricardo and Lucy Ricardo? Yeah, exactly. So she has like two rooms. So I'm going to switch it up and sleep in a different room tonight to figure out which room I like more. Okay. A little Goldilocks action. Will it be based on air conditioning? I don't know.

I don't know, it'll just be based on vibes. - Sounds? Vibes? - Vibes, yeah. Which room do I sleep better in? - Speaking of vibes, the ESPYs happened last night, holy moly. Jaylen Brown pulled up with Kaiser. They was looking stunning. Serena was a great host. She did a couple, she threw a couple jabs at Drake. You know what I mean? It was lovely. Did y'all watch that?

I actually saw highlights and I saw some on social media. And I like that Jalen Brown was asked, of course, what would you ask Jalen Brown? You'd ask, hey, are you despondent that you're not on Team USA? And he was much more focused on his date. As he should be. He said, I want you all to look at who I'm with, not what I'm doing.

The ESPYs used to be... They used to mean something. I know this sounds old. They used to mean something. I woke up today and I found out the ESPYs were yesterday. I couldn't believe it. Also because the ESPYs historically have been the day after the MLB All-Star game. When there used to be no sports, but now there are sports because of WNBA. And maybe MLS, I assume, may have games. Yeah, but MLB had games yesterday. WNBA had games yesterday. There's winners not present. It was bizarre. I don't understand why they did it. And also, I mean...

I don't know if everyone experiences the same way. I had no idea the ESPYs were coming up. And it could be maybe because I've switched from traditional cable to streaming where now I will go and find it as opposed to when I had cable, I'd just have the TV on. It was on ESPN all the time. And when we were there, obviously, I was constantly hearing ESPY week, ESPY week, the ESPYs are coming up. I had no idea the ESPYs were coming up. I found out on Twitter, and I didn't turn to it.

because I wasn't engaged in the ESPYs the way I used to be. And it's not an age. I don't want to call myself old. I used to think that winning an ESPY was a thing. I viewed it as Oscar's light. Bruh, just because y'all don't go to the beach don't mean Cisco ain't out there doing the thong song right now. Like,

The ESPY still means a lot, brothers. Like, you got two kids now, so your focus ain't there. And you got a show to do this week, so your focus is not there. Brother, it's people that's been locked in on these ESPYs. Like, people won great awards last night. Were there any upsets? I mean, I just like the fact that Caitlyn was celebrated, Juju Watkins was celebrated. It was just a night of celebration and fun. And I don't get to see Serena in those kind of atmospheres like that. She showed her personality. I loved it.

But that's the thing that's frustrating about it, right? Is that they did it at a time they can't actually be there to be celebrated. Like, they're celebrating them from afar as opposed to kind of accommodating the athletes scheduled. Did they have Zoom acceptance speeches? No, I think they were playing games.

Yeah, so Asia Wilson and Caitlin both won awards, and they just filmed a video that they played. I wanted to watch it simply because this was the only time they were ever going to talk about Iowa at any major award show ever, so I said, I am not going to miss this moment. But when I was trying to watch it, it wasn't even on ESPN. It was some homerun derby preview show on ESPN, which I didn't watch. I'm sorry, Billy. Oh, God.

And so it was only on ABC when I was trying to watch it. Maybe that changed. But I was like, aren't the ESPYs on ESPN? This is why I realized. So did they delay the start of the ESPYs for the Biden press conference? They did. So the live show got delayed. I started watching the Biden press conference at 630 when he was supposed to go on. It was announced. And he went on at 727. And off at 826. What time did the ESPYs start?

I don't know. Right after? Literally right then, yeah. And it opened up with, I think Sierra did a musical number. Caitlin did win, so that was super, super cool for me. Prince Harry won, too. Yeah, that was weird. He won the Pat Tillman Award. That feels strange, right? I think that they thought good ratings get Meghan Markle and Prince Harry.

I doubt it made any difference whatsoever. Yeah, we're past that point. 2021, though. They have fallen like a meteor. And they could have really, I think we were talking about this a little bit before the show when we were discussing the ESPYs and Serena hosting and everything there. The idea that the two of them sort of like took the money from Spotify and Netflix and everybody after not embracing the royalty was,

They could have remained popular by just leaving the royal family and sort of staying out of the limelight for a little while. But when they cashed in immediately, it kind of like ruined the appeal of what it was that they were doing. I'm trying to think about anyone in my lifetime who had who's fallen more out of grace than Harry and Meghan.

They were... Antonio Brown. Antonio Brown, though, was never... I mean, it's the top five list, but was he ever as high as Harry and Meghan? Nobody. I mean, in terms of level? You have someone, Lucy? Bill Cosby. Kevin Spacey.

Kevin Spacey, there's no way he was as high. Bill Cosby's an interesting one. Will Smith, slap heard around the world. And he's back. And he's back. He's back in a major way. Because of Bad Boys 7 with Jimmy Butler. Because he has spunk. He has charisma, bro. His son got it. His daughter got it. His wife got it. Can't do number rides to the top. I'm going to say that Prince Harry is better known than Will Smith or Bill Cosby around the world.

Maybe Justin Timberlake might be on this list. No way. He's getting there. He was as popular as any artist in the world for a stretch there. And right now, he is certainly not beloved. I must be overvaluing. I have a very hard time with fame and with players and with putting people at their right levels. Tom Sandoval? No.

He was like Dish, and then he cheated on Ariana with Raquel. And then that became a whole thing. Even though it worked out for Ariana because... Is that the Bravo thing? Yeah, it is. It's a joke. No, but that's good. There's a whole thing. It worked out great for Ariana, if we're going to be honest. I have a daughter who works there. I get it. Really? Yes. Wow. But it's not... That's not even in the same... That's like single A compared to Harry and Meghan. Oh, yes, obviously. I'm not sure that there's... They're major league. Chris Brown. David.

I didn't like fall from grace that much. Like, I don't think people act like I don't think people actively hate them and they're not like bad people. Like, I don't. It's just more irrelevant. My thing is, yeah, I don't think about them ever. Exactly. Which is what we're talking about. It's allegedly what they wanted until no one thought about them. And then they wanted everyone to think about. And now they're at the ESPYs. Yeah. I really wanted to do a stat of the day, Billy.

Okay. Can I do one? About Prince Harry? I do have a stat about Prince Harry, but no, that's not the stat of the day. What's your stat about Prince Harry? His lack of relevance. That's not a stat, though. That feels like an opinion. An opinion? Aren't all stats of the day opinions? I don't believe so. I think that's kind of the definition of stat. That it has to be real? Yeah, that it's not an opinion. I got to acknowledge, Tony's been showing me too much, bro.

There's a lot going on with you guys. I'm breaking my dollars. Tony, they got us. Come from behind the sheet. What's happening? They got us. We don't need to do it, Billy. I'm distracted by it. The ESPYs was delayed for some reason.

Crazy stuff. I'll just say that. That's all I'm gonna say. It was some crazy stuff happening before the ESPYs last night. I give Dan credit because what I'm looking at when you guys are doing what you're doing and when I sat there yesterday, I couldn't feel more left out. The two of you are laughing. You're talking to each other. Meanwhile, Jeremy's talking. Lucy's talking. Sometimes when Lucy's talking, I can't hear it because she's talking to somebody, not me.

Don't know who. Talking to Billy, I guess. I'm reading your lips only. Didn't even hear you say that. Very long. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day.

God, that goes 10 seconds too long.

Do you want to know the number of pitchers to have multiple starts of zero hits? Hell yeah. As in zero hits with 11-plus strikeouts in a season. Absolutely. The number of pitchers to have multiple starts in one season. No hits, 11 strikeouts. Two. Nolan Ryan...

And Paul Skeens. He's amazing. A follow-up to that is that Randy Johnson and Max Scherzer combined for two starts in their entire careers with no hits and 11 strikeouts. And Paul Skeens has now done it two times in his first 11 starts. And you're worried that he's not going to start the All-Star game? Oh, he'll start the All-Star. He's more relevant than Harry right now, which shocks me. Happy birthday, Lucy.

Summer's the best time to run the way you want. Dial it up with new challenges and programs and bring your workouts with you to make the most of outside sunny days. Stugatz, guess what? What? You know what you can do with Peloton? What? Get the app, go outside, ride a bike. Well, I thought you ride Peloton inside. Well, you do, you can ride Peloton inside if it's a rainy day or if it's cloudy or you just don't want to get outside, maybe it's too hot.

summertime go outside i record a lot for my office with you and you've noticed it's sitting there yet it hasn't been used well now's the time summer's the best time to start that push right can we do it together not on the same bike but we could join a class together i used to do that we just have guillermo tan i'd invite people we'd all take a class together okay time so i think you're starting to get concerned about my health and my age billy i i sense that with you we're beyond starting okay

Whatever road lies ahead, your training starts here with Peloton Tread and Tread Plus. It's not just a bike, a treadmill too. I'm going to go outside. I'm going to get in shape. I'm going to do it with Billy Gill. I want to be in your class. I want you to be my instructor. You know what? I won't be your instructor. You don't want to spend more time with me. No, I can schedule a class and we can ride together. I won't be the instructor of the class. We can have Camila could be our instructor. I like the Grateful Dead class. My daughter, she uses the Peloton. Mm-hmm.

She was on it once and an instructor who was playing Grateful Dead tunes. Let's do that. Okay. Why don't we go for a run outside? Guided run. Peloton. Me and you. That's something we can do together. Okay. Turn on the app. Me and you go outside. Enjoy the summer. Call yourself a runner with Peloton at onepeloton.com slash running. All right.

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