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cover of episode Rabbi Avremi Zippel on How You Find Purpose in Your Pain EP 175

Rabbi Avremi Zippel on How You Find Purpose in Your Pain EP 175

2022/8/12
logo of podcast Passion Struck with John R. Miles

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

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John R. Miles
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Rabbi Avremi Zippel
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Rabbi Avremi Zippel: 我在童年时期遭受了长达十年的性虐待,这给我带来了巨大的痛苦和自责。多年来,我一直试图掩盖这段经历,但这只会加剧我的痛苦。直到我20多岁时,我才意识到自己遭受过性虐待。在寻求专业帮助后,我开始理解这段经历对我的影响,并最终决定向警方报案。虽然法庭审判的过程非常痛苦和具有挑战性,但我最终获得了正义,并且在痛苦中找到了目标。我现在致力于帮助其他儿童性虐待幸存者,并倡导更公正的司法体系。 我的故事并非个例,许多儿童性虐待幸存者都经历了类似的痛苦和孤独。我们常常将责任归咎于自己,并试图掩盖这段经历。然而,逃避并不能解决问题,只有直面并处理创伤,才能开始疗愈。寻求专业帮助至关重要,这有助于理解事件的背景以及对个人生活的影响。 在法庭审判中,我经历了重新创伤的过程,但我也认识到,正义的定义是主观的,我需要自己定义什么是正义。我感谢自己能够在经历这一切后,找到某种程度上的正义感。 我致力于倡导更公正的司法体系,这需要我们改变对创伤的认知和处理方式。我们需要认识到,重新创伤是真实存在的,它会对幸存者造成严重的影响。我们需要建立一个尊重和理解幸存者需求的体系。 John R. Miles: 本期节目邀请了Rabbi Avremi Zippel分享他的故事,他公开讲述了自己在童年时期遭受的性虐待经历,并以此为契机,成为一名倡导者,帮助其他儿童性虐待幸存者。他的故事强调了创伤疗愈的重要性,以及在痛苦中寻找目标和意义的可能性。 许多幸存者在向他人倾诉创伤经历后,会惊讶地发现自己收到了意料之外的同理心、爱和关怀,这与他们过去对自己苛刻的态度形成鲜明对比。 试图掩盖创伤经历只会加剧痛苦,与其逃避,不如直面并处理它。寻求专业帮助至关重要,这有助于理解事件的背景以及对个人生活的影响。 在法庭审判中,受害者常常会经历重新创伤的过程,但重要的是要记住,正义的定义是主观的,幸存者需要自己定义什么是正义。 我们需要改变对创伤的认知和处理方式,建立一个尊重和理解幸存者需求的体系。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

Why did Rabbi Avremi Zippel decide to come forward about his childhood abuse?

Rabbi Avremi Zippel decided to come forward after watching Aly Raisman testify about her abuse during the USA Gymnastics scandal. Her bravery inspired him to report his own abuse to law enforcement, seeking accountability and justice.

What was the impact of Rabbi Avremi Zippel's abuse on his mental health?

The abuse led to severe mental health challenges, including panic attacks and a prolonged period of self-blame and guilt. It took years of therapy and support for him to begin healing and to understand the trauma he endured.

How did Rabbi Avremi Zippel's upbringing in an Orthodox Jewish family influence his experience of abuse?

Growing up in an Orthodox Jewish family, Rabbi Zippel was homeschooled and lived in a close-knit, insular community. This environment, combined with the trust placed in his caregiver, made it difficult for him to recognize and report the abuse, as he felt the caregiver was beyond reproach.

What advice does Rabbi Avremi Zippel give to survivors of abuse?

Rabbi Zippel advises survivors to take things at their own pace, avoid comparing their journey to others, and seek professional help. He emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance, understanding the impact of trauma, and finding purpose in their pain.

What was the outcome of Rabbi Avremi Zippel's trial against his abuser?

The trial resulted in a guilty verdict on all charges against his abuser. However, Rabbi Zippel emphasizes that justice is subjective and that healing comes from finding personal closure, not just from the legal outcome.

How did Rabbi Avremi Zippel's family react when he disclosed his abuse?

His family was initially shocked and struggled to accept the reality of his abuse, as it was something they believed didn't happen in their community. However, they were supportive once they understood the gravity of the situation and stood by him throughout the legal process.

What role did therapy play in Rabbi Avremi Zippel's healing process?

Therapy was crucial in helping Rabbi Zippel understand and process the trauma he endured. It allowed him to unpack the abuse, confront his feelings of guilt and shame, and begin the journey toward healing and self-acceptance.

Why does Rabbi Avremi Zippel emphasize the importance of finding purpose in pain?

Rabbi Zippel believes that finding purpose in pain is essential for healing. By transforming his traumatic experiences into advocacy and support for other survivors, he has been able to create meaning from his suffering and inspire others to do the same.

What challenges did Rabbi Avremi Zippel face during the trial against his abuser?

The trial was re-traumatizing and emotionally overwhelming, as the defense attorney attempted to shift blame onto Rabbi Zippel. The combative nature of the legal system made the process particularly difficult, but he found strength in his support system and the pursuit of accountability.

What message does Rabbi Avremi Zippel hope to convey through his story?

Rabbi Zippel hopes to inspire survivors to embrace their resilience and strength, and to find purpose in their pain. He encourages others to seek healing, advocate for change, and live authentically, regardless of their past experiences.

Chapters
Rabbi Avremi Zippel recounts his unique upbringing in an Orthodox Jewish family in Salt Lake City, including being homeschooled and the challenges and rewards of this experience. He also discusses his large family and his early life in Utah.
  • Raised in Salt Lake City in an Orthodox Jewish family
  • Homeschooled with siblings
  • Unique experience of being an observant Jew in Salt Lake City
  • Life of service and commitment to values

Shownotes Transcript

Rabbi Avremi Zippel shares his story of childhood abuse and how he changed his story to one of hope, strength, and inspiration by finding purpose through his pain. For victims of any form of trauma or abuse, this is a podcast you don't want to miss. *| *Brought to you by Gusto. Go to (https://www.gusto.com/passionstruck))  for three months free.

Rabbi Avremi Zippel is the program director at the Chabad Lubavitch of Utah. Avremi and his wife Sheina founded Young Jewish Professionals Utah, which has since grown to become the most prominent community of its kind across the State.  In 2019, Avremi testified publicly about the decade of sexual abuse he endured at the hands of a family caregiver as part of the criminal proceedings against her. Believed to be the first Orthodox Rabbi to speak out on the topic, it has sparked a career in the advocacy space for Avremi, as he has become a sought-after speaker and mentor to communities around the world grappling with this challenge, among other mental health-related issues.

--► Get the full show notes: https://passionstruck.com/avremi-zippel-find-purpose-in-your-pain/

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--► Subscribe to the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/passion-struck-with-john-r-miles/id1553279283)

*Our Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/passionstruck).

Thank You to Our Sponsors

This episode of Passion Struck with John R. Miles is brought to you by Gusto, which provides cloud-based payroll, benefits, and human resource management software for businesses based in the United States. For three months free, go to https://www.gusto.com/passionstruck).

What I Discuss With Rabbi Avremi Zipple About Finding Purpose In Your Pain

Rabbi Avremi Zippel came forward publicly in 2019 about the decade of sexual abuse he survived from a trusted childhood caretaker. Since then, Avremi discussed why he took an advocacy role in battling sexual abuse worldwide and championing survivors. During our discussion, Rabbi Zippel shows survivors of child sexual abuse how they can overcome their ordeal through support, love, and acceptance.

  • Avremi’s childhood growing up in an orthodox Jewish family where he was homeschooled.

  • How his caretaker, who entered his life as a close family friend, ultimately altered it forever.

  • Avremi discusses the moment watching Law and Order in his early twenties when he realized he had suffered child sexual abuse.

  • Why he felt self-blame for the abuse and decided to keep it a secret from his family and wife.

  • How burying it ultimately had devastating effects on his life.

  • Why going through talk therapy opened allowed him to start to heal from his past.

  • We then turn to the healing journey he has been on.

  • Why he chose to report the incident to the police.

  • We discuss the eventual trial and its ultimate verdict.

  • We examine how his life has changed following the verdict and his advice to others on how to overcome abuse and trauma.

  • And so much more.

Where to Find Rabbi Avremi Zippel

 

Show Links

 

-- John R. Miles is the CEO, and Founder of PASSION STRUCK®, the first of its kind company, focused on impacting real change by teaching people how to live Intentionally. He is on a mission to help people live a no-regrets life that exalts their victories and lets them know they matter in the world. For over two decades, he built his own career applying his research of passion struck leadership, first becoming a Fortune 50 CIO and then a multi-industry CEO. He is the executive producer and host of the top-ranked Passion Struck Podcast, selected as one of the Top 50 most inspirational podcasts in 2022. Learn more about John: https://johnrmiles.com/

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