The Chiefs Break Buffalo’s Heart, Philly Rolls, and Guess the SB Lines With Cousin Sal
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Coming up, the last edition of Guess the Lines with Cousins Sal. We're going to talk Super Bowl. We're going to talk conference finals. It's all next. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. State Farm helps you score an affordable price when you choose to bundle home and auto insurance with the personal price plan. Bundling home and auto, that's a pro move. Just another way you can save on your insurance needs. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can bundle and save with the personal price plan.

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We're also brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network. I do have a new Rewatchables episode coming for you on Monday night. Can't wait for you to hear it. You can also watch it on the Ringer Movies YouTube channel as well. Coming up on this podcast, Cousin Sal is joining me. We did this live on YouTube, which you can follow if you want to. And the Bill Simmons YouTube channel, please subscribe. We are going to be breaking down the two games today and what's coming up in the Super Bowl. And I have a very action-packed

parent corner for you. So it's all next. First, our friends from ProJet. All right. We are on YouTube. Cousin Sal is here taping the BS podcast after another magical NFL playoff game. Sal, I've had the worst weekend and I can't wait to talk to you about it. This game reinvigorated me.

It poured a Red Bull and a coffee and a giant line of cocaine into my body. I am ready for this podcast, baby. All right. Okay, so good. That means you took the Chiefs, and I had them too. But just as an emotional hedge, and then you look back, I'm like, oh my God, I have so much money on this team as an emotional hedge. It's going to be emotional the other way when I have to explain to the family we have to move if the Bills win. So, wow, what a game. What a game. Do it every year. Who cares? Who cares?

Yeah. So there's going to be a lot of stuff over the next two weeks about chiefs Eagles. We had this already. The chiefs are back. Come on. Here's where I've landed. And I feel like I've been here for most of my life, but really, especially as I get older, I really like true greatness. Like I, I, I really appreciate this chiefs team. I bet on them. I,

I really wanted them to cover the bet, obviously. But I also really liked the fact that every once in a while in sports, you have this measuring stick, not just for the sport, but for all the sports, right? Like I hated the Yankees in the late 80s, you know, late 90s. I hated that team, but I respected the shit out of them. When Arizona beat them in 2001, it was like, this is momentous. Wait, the Pats were able to get that in the mid 2010s.

And Philly beat them with Foles and Peterson. It was like, this feels momentous. I think you need teams like that. When the Warriors lost in 2019, you need teams every once in a while that are truly great. And then you see how everyone measures up and they did it again. I don't know when this stops.

Of course you do. Yeah, you don't want parity in everything all the time, everywhere. Like, you know, I think if you ask people honestly, they would want Washington and Buffalo to have advanced today, right? So that wasn't going to happen because everybody wanted it, right? But other than that, I love that the Chiefs are in it. Mahomes is great. And we saw the greatest quarterback of all time in Brady. And now we're possibly seeing his...

greatest successor in Mahomes. And that is exactly why I hate when people lead with all the referees screwed them all the way. Like, no, I don't like the negative stigma because that then football could turn into your crappy sport. Sorry, the NBA and where everybody's talking bad about it. And like, we're forgetting the fact that we're seeing Mahomes and he's the greatest or close to the greatest. So stop that talk, you know? Yeah, that Buffalo doesn't get the two point.

Yeah. And Casey gets the ball down one fourth quarter and you're just going, Mahomes is taking this down. He's going to score. He's going to get the two point and they're going to be up seven. I was already mentally in the stage of if Buffalo then gets the ball and scores the TD, will they go for one or two? You're like the chiefs hadn't even done anything yet. You just knew they were going to go down and do it. I mean, the Mahomes thing,

Just big picture. This is now five Superbowl appearances before age 30. He's 20 and three in the playoffs. He's beaten Josh Allen, who I think along with Burrow, but I think Allen over Burrow and probably over Lamar Allen's his number one rival. He's beaten him four times in a row now in the playoffs. And, and, uh, he just feels like it feels like that Brady versus my homes, that first playoff game that the first playoff loss, my homes had Brady beats him.

And then it's like, he just handed a torch to him and he's like, all right, go ahead, take it. And now it just feels like the chiefs became the pets.

Yeah. He handed the torch and Mahomes, I think like played a little game with the bills. Like, look, we don't turn the ball over. We haven't turned the ball over since November. There's been like 280 turnovers in the NFL and none of us, none of them attributed to the chiefs. So what do they do? They fumble. Right. Recovered, but they're offsides the bills. So it doesn't count like two plays later. Like, all right, we're going to give you one more chance. This is it. And even this isn't going to matter.

And they fumble. And that was the only turnover of the game, right? And still, they couldn't get it done because you got the Chiefs with the ball last. And that's what's going to happen. Well, you have on the flip side, Buffalo. Allen comes out. First drive, he throws two picks that get dropped. Right. Allen fumbles twice, pulls back both of them, recovers both of them, including on that fourth and one. I did have a moment where I thought to myself, maybe this doesn't happen. Because I remember in the Pats Eagles Super Bowl,

Uh, which I sadly watched with nephew Kyle. Um, even did the bitter end. They've all, I don't really remember what the score was, but the Pats did get the ball with like a little over two minutes left and they're on like the 20 and,

We were all like, we're winning this. And then when Brady got stripped, it was, it was so shocking. It was like, oh my God, somebody beat us. Um, that's, there was a moment in this game. It w it was when Buffalo was driving, wondering if they were going to go for two or not and thinking like, ah, what happens if like they go for two, they get it.

And Casey, just something weird happens and all of a sudden they're punting and they're down one and Buffalo has a chance to just run out the clock on them. But that's the thing. Casey's avoided this. They say, what'd they say? 17 straight one possession wins. Yeah. That's a crazy stat. And because of that, when they're driving at the end and they're minus 146, I'm crazy about the numbers. As you know, I, yeah, you were texting me during every time out. I don't know what the hell to do with the numbers, but I'm wild about it.

I just love it. And it's minus 146. I'm like, wow, that's suspiciously low for this team that's going for a three P and never loses one score games. And then they were minus 154 when they had the three point lead.

And the bills were driving or whatever with that last possession there. So it is just amazing what the hell they've done. And I look at the numbers. I'm like, it doesn't even really add up with Mahomes and the stats and how they keep winning. And, you know, the right, he didn't have an incredible game. He ran for two touchdowns. He only threw for one. Yeah. The stats, the team stats were pretty even.

How the Bills outrushed them by just 12 yards. I don't remember a ton of... It felt like 200. And Cook wasn't in the game on a couple of big plays. I do think McDermott, who, by the way, they found out he's Bill Burr's brother. I didn't even know this. Oh, is he? Yeah, isn't that something? I didn't hear them announce that. Yeah. He got outcoached. He got bailed out, I think, early when they scored on fourth down. But he was outcoached and Spags wasn't going to let it happen twice in an hour.

Yeah, this was a weird game because Lombardi, shout out to Lombardi, always used to talk about the middle eight, the last four minutes of the first half, first four minutes of the second half. The Chiefs have the ball and they're driving down in the last four minutes of the first half. They get that crazy worthy call that...

We do this all the time. I still don't understand the rules of football and I watch football. Neither guy had possession and the ball touched the ground and it just seems like that's a dead play. Nobody gets it. They should have gone back to the 20 instead of the five, whatever. So they score...

And you start going, wow, this could be a blowout. They're up 21-10. They stop the Buffalo here at the end of the half. They get the ball. The Chiefs at the start of the play. Well, they didn't stop them. The Bills scored, but they didn't get the two. But I'm saying before the Bills went down, it felt like the Chiefs were going to blow the game open. I got you. Yeah, yeah. Right. Buffalo comes back down. He hits Matt Collins in that touchdown. It's 21-16. Now, all of a sudden, the Chiefs get stopped at the top of this. So they actually lost the middle eight because then Buffalo came down and took the lead.

And they still, and they still won the chiefs somehow. Yeah. Yeah. It was weird because yeah, you're right. Cause the chiefs got the ball in the second half. Is that what you're saying? And then they, I thought they were going to get last position in the first half, first position, second half, you score both times. You're up 28, 10. Yeah.

Yeah, they did. The Bills had the ball and then hooked. Yeah, it was interesting. It really was. And let's put everything in perspective. With that play that hit the ground and should have been called incomplete, it was holding on Hamlin. He mugged Kelsey, backpacked him, jumped on his back. So it would have been first down at the 20. Maybe the Bills don't have enough time to drive back and get the six. I don't know that the Chiefs score either. But, you know...

But let's, before everybody points to, oh, the Chiefs got lucky again. No, that turned out to help Buffalo. That's what I thought. Because if the challenge had been overturned, you're right, they probably don't get the ball in the first half. Right. And that was the one real mistake that the Chiefs made was leaving Hollins open on that one play. Hollins ended up having two big plays. His over-under for catches was basically, I think it was one catch. It was around even. It was like minus 130, something like that. If I'm Buffalo,

and I leave this game, do you leave this game going? How did we not win that game? Or do you leave that game going? We're just like three plays short. Every time we play this team, we have the fourth, the one, the QB sneak where Alan actually gets stuffed. Wait, who knows if he actually got stuffed or not, but they called it Casey ball. You have the Kincaid play where, um,

I don't know. That was the fourth and five spags caused the blitz. You knew it was coming. Alan makes a great, just to jump up and heave it toward Kincaid was great, but they had that wide shot of it. And it seemed like the ball was almost like spinning. It was almost like, uh,

Like when a baseball, when they hit like the, the pop fly that just is like, has some weird thing to it. And KK dropped it. And I'm sure he's going to take shit tomorrow, but I actually thought that seemed like a pretty tough catch. Did you think that was a drop or a catch? It was rough. There was traffic around them. It was kind of like a moon ball, you know, and he's got to catch it at his feet. Probably should have grabbed it. But in that situation, like that's, he was running for his life and he's just trying to get good positioning on that ball. But,

It's the kind of play that a D-back drops over and over again. Yeah. Like the tip play at the line or the flutter and it's, oh, I can't believe he dropped that. And, but,

but Kincaid was on offense. But to answer your original question, the Bills are looking at this like not that we're three plays away, that they should have won the game. Like they're done losing to this team, right? They already beat them in the regular season. They're not like us where we could rationalize it and be like, well, they just can't beat them at arrowhead. It's a different beast. They know deep down they're just as good and they can't take it. This is a demoralizing loss for them. I mean, after a while, you do maybe believe that you can't overtake the beast, but

Yeah, another. Yeah, I don't know. Well, there's the what more do we have to do factor, right? They won the turnover battle. They outrushed them. Mahomes had fewer than 20 completions. Right. You know, I don't know. They scored 29 and they became the first team to give up over 30 to the Chiefs. Weird.

Well, so the chiefs have the ball after the two minute warning, the bills don't get it. And the bills need to get a stop. Did you think they were going to get the stop? Cause I did not. And it's, as it turns out, they had two chances to get a stop because the bills scored, they got the first down on second down, but the guy stepped out of bounds. So now they had this fresh set of downs. Right. And each time the chiefs were able to get the eight, nine plays. Conversely, Buffalo had a bunch of chances.

to make a big plan of fourth and one or fourth and five, fourth and three. And there was a couple they didn't get. So I would, I would assume that would probably be. Yeah. Sure. Driving them crazy too. They did get that when they were down. What was it? Seven when they got the fourth down play in the end zone to Samuel. Yeah.

That was a nice play. I didn't think they were going to get that one. McDermott need, sorry, Spaggs needed to dial up what he did for the very last Bills offensive play for that fourth down play because it came out of a timeout. They have a timeout and then one play on third down and then that play. So that was bad for the Chiefs defense. But I'll tell you, you're right with the short yardage. And I think we, I think we watched almost three

three and a half hours of quarterbacks plunging on fourth and one today between the two games. The most fourth and ones that felt like ever in the history of the league. I like that. They don't make it sometimes. I really do. Like maybe, maybe teams will, I don't like it. Like when we were growing up in the seventies and eighties where, you know, it was a fourth and one attempt on offense every six weeks or something. But,

I don't know. Just be a little more creative on the fourth and ones. But Cook wasn't even in the backfield for a lot of those. So Buffalo missed two points, right? Then they missed a fourth and short. And you would think with Allen, they would be the most devastating team in the league with any fourth and one, fourth and short. Two point, which was, I don't know, one of the legacies of this game. It was kind of shocking not to see them

get certain plays. I felt like the Chiefs were slightly better just because I felt like their defense, I trusted their D a little bit more to maybe get a stop when they really, really, really, really needed it. Even that, you mentioned that spag splits on the last play, that fourth and five. This goes back to what I was saying earlier about

how fun it is to have a team like this, that we have a real history with it. You know, we, we root for these NFL teams and the entire team changes over in two years, you know, or you have these teams like, look at what, what's going to happen in the Cowboys. And they haven't even made the Superbowl, but two years from now, I don't know. We lost the connection. What did you say? Two years from now, are Dak, CD lamb and Prescott all going to be on the team? Probably not.

And that's usually how it plays out. I know, you're right. But in this team...

Same infrastructure. It's Mahomes. It's always some cast of running backs and wide receivers with Kelsey. They always have a decent line. Chris Jones is always there. Andy Reid always is doing some funky plays that seem like they're going to work. And then Spaggs, every time they need it, seems to dial up the perfect blitz. That blitz on Allen was a great call. I was waiting for it the whole game and it didn't seem like they could find it. Then they found it.

That's what they needed before the last score. But you and I, I think, thought we were texting. We thought this game was over. Like you said, that second quarter. I did. I thought when it was 21-10, I thought they were going to blow it out. Well, because, I mean, they were picking on that Elam guy. Like, you know, like Romo said, it was like, you know, cover one, single safety. It's just going to be the stop route all the time with Worthy picking on this guy. Yeah, so. By the way, Romo crushed Brady today by 35 points. That was the biggest blowout.

Yeah, Romo, I thought, that was about as good as he's been in a few years. I thought he was all over the game, spotting stuff, spelling stuff out, telling us what was going to happen. With the Buffalo piece, the defense had a couple injuries, and it was pretty...

I don't want to say flimsy, but it was a, it was okay. Never like a great defense to begin with. They reminded me a little of what happened to Washington today. Washington probably were lost anyway, but when it came out over the weekend that they were losing their run, stopping defensive tackle. Yeah. You can kind of pass the point and overturn. And it felt like they're secondary. I just didn't trust the people that had that poor Benford got two concussions and

a week, it looks like. You and I haven't mentioned Christian Benford or Deron Payne at all over 23 weeks. Yes. No, ever. Yes, you're right. And those arguably were the two biggest, you know, one, you know, neither, both for not being able to play. And yeah, Benford actually got out with the second concussion, we think. And it was like the first series. Yeah. Yeah. But you have these things where you've already decided mentally where you're going in a game.

And it's already like, if you're taking Washington, it's a pretty flimsy case. It's like, they're not going to turn the ball over. Jaden Daniels is going to go up a level. He's going to be able to match Philly and Hertz is going to kind of suck. Like that was the case. The other case was Philly's going to run all over them. Washington's luck going to run out turnovers and Philly's going to blow them out. You can see the two cases. It was like, ah, I like the Washington case more. So I took that one. And then you find out their run stuffers done. Yeah.

When I didn't really like the run defense to begin with. And it's like a 15 yard difference when he's out and when he's like, Oh, this isn't a great sign. But yeah, I mean, we'll talk about that game later, but Philly was also great. The Buffalo thing, this might've been their best chance. Cause I'll say this. I still think Baltimore might've been the best team from a talent standpoint.

And I watched in this game, I guarantee like Ray, the Ravens, the Ravens fan watching this game today, you had to, yeah, I was texting Mallory about it and she's like still sick. Yeah. She's cause you watch what was working against the chiefs. The Ravens were better at pounding the ball, running the ball, being physical. And they had a better defense than the bills. And I'm sure they felt like shit. If we'd just gotten in there, we could have beaten that team.

But they didn't. I mean, we talked about it last week, how important, so stupid, but how important turnovers are. And we'll get to it in the Philly game, which absolutely dominated the discussion. But yeah, if the Ravens don't turn the ball over, it's a different story altogether. And maybe if they get a home game too against Buffalo. Does it seem like football is just now about

The turnover battle who wins, how you did on fourth and one and fourth and two, because there's so many of them now and the variance of those is huge. And did you just avoid having a massive fuck up? Yeah. And it seems like in a game like this in Buffalo, all season was kind of pulling off games like this and their luck finally,

ran out today. And I know the Buffalo fans last week were pissed because everyone was dwelling on how Baltimore blew the game. And they're like, well, we also won the game. We didn't mess up. We didn't make mistakes. This game, they made some mistakes. Yeah. Well, that's why I took the Chiefs. I'm not going to take a laugh because I recognize like,

Whoever had the ball last pretty much went. The last six minutes are going to decide this game. But when I was thinking about it, I'm like, wait a minute. I'm going to go against the Chiefs who, like I said, haven't turned the ball over since November. And they're trying to repeat. And they're in the arrowhead and have a chip on their shoulder against Buffalo who beat them in the regular season. Like, no freaking way. It's a point and a half. That's stupid. The line was too low. I think if it was Chiefs by three, it was a different thought process. But the one and a half, how can you not...

we did this last year. You had the Ravens too last year, right? Yeah. In the AFC title game. And that was my never again moment. I was just like, as long as they're... That was three and a half. Yeah. Yeah. As long as the Chiefs are the Chiefs, it's just not worth it because they're going to figure this out year after year. So, on the plus side for Allen, before we get to some of the negative stuff,

That pass he threw to Matt Collins before halftime was fantastic. Fabulous. The list of QBs who can hit that one with the speed and the accuracy that he hit is not... It's basically him and Drake May. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I lost consciousness for a second there. That was a joke. It was him, Drake May, a couple others. But he hit that one. He also had that big drive to...

you know, give them the lead in the third quarter. He had the other comeback drive when it was 29, 22, he brought them down again and they scored. And I was thinking like, cause I don't, I don't, I don't blame this loss on Alan in any respect. He's in that zone now that I'm not sure you want to be in as a great athlete. And I would call it the Tommy Hearns zone where you're awesome. You're memorable. You're generational talent.

And yet you're the other guy in the sports movie over and over again. And how do you, how do you get out of that? How do you snap out of that? Hearns was in all these great sports moments and he lost most of them, but he was still great. Like he's like one of the best boxers I've ever seen in my life. There's, he was a one-on-one, nobody like him. Six foot one, 147, crazy punchy power. He fought everybody. And yet his legacy was like, he lost the Leonard fight. He lost the Hagler fight.

So how is he different from Lamar then in that respect? Because they're pointing the same fingers, right? I think Lamar is a little bit of a different case because he's kind of come up short in these big moments. Allen's had these moments like in the 13th second game. So he's Roberto Duran? Who's Lamar? Drake May. No. That's a two-way Lamar.

I feel like Lamar's story hasn't, I, I, I want to, I'll answer that next year. Not quite ready to next year. Label him. I want to see one more. Write this down. Well, what is tougher? Like what boxer didn't come through every time it mattered? I don't know. I don't know who that is.

But now the point with Josh is like, they've lost games where he was really good in the game. I thought he was really good in the game today. Yeah. You know, if you're a Bills fan, you're like, man, Josh has to do more. That's not why he lost. No, there's a bunch. I thought the play calling was atrocious. I thought the OC, I just don't understand some of those third and short, fourth and short. It felt like anytime they play action, they had guys all over the place. Yeah.

So I would be more mad about that if I were them. Yeah, I think the Bills fans, at least early on, I could see they're very upset with the coaching staff. You know, because when you can't blame the kicker, when you can't kill the kicker and they can't, it goes right to the quarterback or coaching staff. And it seems like the coaches are getting, we should real quick shout out to James Cook. I mean, that was a spectacular, spectacular play on fourth and two. By the way, good job. Another great play by Josh Allen, flipping that to him.

On the quarterback option. With some speed. Yeah. Sometimes the toss is too soft. Right. That one kind of whipped it to the point that Cook might have like, whatever. But it kind of had to get there then, right? Had to get there. Yeah. And for him to be able to stay horizontally and bridge on his hand without the elbow falling and extend it over the goal line with the other hand was really one of the better plays I've seen all year.

We've had a real resurgence with good running backs. This position that everybody thought didn't matter. And then you look around, it's like Barkley and Jameer Gibbs and Cook and gone down the line. It seems like it's more important than it used to be. Back to the Alan Tommy Hearns thing for a second. The sad shot at the end when the team's running out the clock.

And then cut to the guy losing QB on the, just sitting on the bench with that, like deer in the headlights look. It's a tough one. You don't, you don't want that to be legacy in a weird way from a career move standpoint. I actually think he gains human interest stature.

Cause now he's come so close a few to, and he just can't get over this. Like next year's chief spills game is even more interesting. This year's game was so interesting. Kyle Brant did a Rocky four, uh, mountain parody with, uh, with him as a sly and my homes is Drago. And I don't even know what next year's version of that is. Right.

Oh, maybe it's Glover Lang. Then Lamar. No, no. Lang won a title. No, no. Yeah, I don't know who Lamar is. Yeah, I don't know what you do with Josh Allen. That sucks with the cutaways. You need more cutaways of his fiance, right? I mean, he's losing that battle too. Taylor Swift. But yeah, he's playing as well as he can and just can't beat this team. Well, and then there's the Buffalo piece of it too, right? So...

Even it's always lingering with the bills game. Like even it's 29, 28, they had just scored a touchdown. They have all this momentum and there's bass and I'm, and I'm sitting there going, I've watched bass miss this. Like I you're watching the PAT intently. It's like, it's the bills. I've seen bass miss this. I'm not positive. This is going through. I'm thinking about Casey minus one and a half minus one. And, uh, he made it, but the baggage of the bills is, is another thing. This is,

There's some franchises like the lions, that playoff loss they had, um, two weeks ago or last week, last week. It was last week. Yeah. It feels like January has been 75 days. Um, that playoff loss. I had, they haven't had a lot of those cause they're never in the playoffs. Meanwhile, the bills have had, you know, it feels like a hundred of these.

They're racking them up. They got to get this game at home. I don't know. Maybe with Pete Carroll in the division, the AFC West, and some of these teams getting better, you know, the Chiefs won't go 15-2 or 15-1 going into the last week. I think it's a hard ask though, Sal. I know. Because you have, you look around the AFC and there's just a bunch of teams that feel like they're poised to maybe jump up a level or teams that had bad luck in 24. What are the Texans going to look like next year?

you know, even in their own division, what could the jets be better next year? If they, if Aaron Glenn turns out to be a good coach, could the Patriots be next year's Washington? Keep my fingers crossed. Could the chargers make a jump up? Could the Broncos like you go on down? And it's just, I don't, I think the AFC is just going to be better next year. And I can't wait to pick all the over-unders correctly with you again. You're going to do such a good job though. Yeah, you did. Uh,

But the Chiefs, as I run my mouth on this whole thing, they went through the whole thing on the road too last year. So I don't even know what matters. Well, you know, they lose Rasheed Rice before the season. He's just a non-factor. This guy who seemed like he was going to be Mahomes' number one target. They're able to patch together. Smith-Schuster was so bad in the preseason for the Pats. It was like,

How are we, I can anyone take this guy from us? And then he's making big plays today. Hopkins who really didn't do that much today. Kelsey who looked like he was 55, but then worthy becomes the key guy. This number one pick that they really shrewdly traded up for their drafts.

The way that they've nailed the drafts, this is the difference between them and what happened in the second part of the Pat's dynasty with the late 2010s when they just started missing drafts. The Chiefs are getting Carl Laftis. They're getting McDuffie. They're getting worthy over and over again. They're nailing guys who are like playing big roles in these playoff games.

And that's, that's how the pats, that's why it ended. Yeah. Seven, the seven, 16, 17, 18 drafts. They just weren't getting people. And that was it. Yeah. Thank God. Um, I, uh, yeah, I will say the one thing we, we skipped over it with Kelsey. Like that's another thing that bills would be like, Oh my God, we held that guy to nothing. He had 14 straight games with 75 or more, 14 straight playoff games. He was invisible to catches for 19 yards. And

They embarrassed the most of the game and still couldn't get it done. It's a lot of, a lot of rough moments there for the Bills. Yeah. They felt, what was their rushing passing? So they did, they ran the ball 32 times. 32 to 22, I think. Yeah. 30, they ran 32. Oh, 32, 34 attempts. 34 passes, 32 carries. Yeah.

And the chiefs were 35 carries 26 passes. This is a really, did people look at this box score like 75 years from now, assuming the earth hasn't melted yet and be like, Whoa, that game, that seemed pretty close. Right.

Travis Kelsey? What, he did nothing? What did the Bills win by? Well, then Hollywood Brown had that huge brain fart on the play when he was open and didn't realize he was standing out of bounds. That's another thing with the Chiefs. Hollywood Brown was supposed to be their big, you know, this big guy that helped them out. Yeah, he plants his right foot directly out of bounds on a ball that should have been catchable.

They keep finding little things around the fringes, like the kick returner made a couple of big plays today. You know, these guys, they, they owe it. They are always able to locate them. And it's a really, it's its own skill because that's the biggest way you can lose. Pacheco and Kelsey, 43 total yards. Like how much would we pull back on our chiefs bet if we had known that was going to happen?

Well, don't you think part of it is everybody and their brother had the Kelsey over? Yeah, that is. I think that was that. And Dallas got her where the Dallas got her hit his, but those two seem like they were the, they gave everyone free Barkley money. And then they're like, no, no, no, we got to figure something out. So one other thing with, so we'll be talking about the chiefs going for the three Pete. And I was going through looking who's three peated in the last 50 years, which is half a century. That's a long time. Jordan's bulls twice. Yeah. The Jacoby Lakers. Yeah.

the late 90s Yankees, the Canadiens, four in a row in the 70s, and then the Islanders four in a row in the 80s. And that's really it, unless you want to count the comments in the first four years of WNBA. This three-peat thing,

especially in the age of parody, the Pats never did it. I can't believe the Pats never did it. I mean, I looked through it too. Obviously they haven't. And the Steelers. It was the Eagles game. And the Niners. It was the Nick Foles, Doug Peterson game. Yeah. But out of Cowboys, Steelers, Patriots, Niners, it's shocking that there was no three-peat. It's shocking that the Bears only won one. We didn't do a three-peat in a game where Brady threw for over 500 yards. Yeah. Like, think about that.

That was how we didn't get it. But this is fucking hard. And you have these games where it's like they tipped our pass to the wide open guy on a fourth down. We missed the two point where the guy was, his foot was out of bounds. We missed the field goal at the end of the first half and we needed those. There's so many things to get that right for three years in a row. It feels, in a league with a salary cap, it feels impossible. Mahomes is great, but it's not like Mahomes was like,

you know, throw everyone on my back. I'm going to carry us all through the season. I don't even think he was one of the three best QBs this year. But he's got homes. There were 15 and two. There were 15 and one heading into the week that they sat everyone. And he wasn't even a top three or four consideration for MVP. That's insane because his stats weren't

Patrick Mahomes-esque is the problem. But as like a Patriot fan and one of the few teams that have had two Pete's, how much are you rooting for? It's not like 72 Dolphins are thrilled and do the champagne toast when a team loses. But are you rooting hard? Because I've talked to some people who have been part of like a two Pete and are rooting hard against anyone having a three Pete.

Yeah, it's an interesting one. Like my dad really doesn't like when the Chiefs do well because he wants the Pats to be better historically than the Chiefs. My thing is like whatever the Pats did, that's what they did.

the Chiefs belong to this different generation. And I, you know, I, it's like if the Chiefs went through in a row, it doesn't diminish what the Pats did. But I think other Pats fans are like, really need the Chiefs to lose, need the Bills to come through. I, it depends on your perspective on it. Yeah. I personally was more, I'm probably leaning more toward, it would be cool if the Bills never won and we were like the last good AFC East team, but I'm more spiteful. Oh, wow. Yeah. That's pretty specific.

Yeah, but... If the Bills never get one and then now with Vrabel and Drake May and $130 million in cap space and whoever we get number four and all of a sudden we can try to take the AFCs from him. I'm in that mindset. But you're trading that for Mahomes could eventually pass Brady as the greatest advert in every conversation. You're willing to put that up for debate? So much is left for him to do that. Brady won seven. Brady beat Mahomes twice.

Brady had the Atlanta game, which is the greatest feat probably any quarterback's pulled off in a game. There's a long way to go. If he wins four in a row, if he four-peats, which, you know, he's a game and a season away from doing, then the conversation becomes real. I don't know. I'm with you. The Bill Simmons Podcast brought to you by FanDuel. Every pass, every play, every prop, it's Super Bowl 59. All of it is happening on FanDuel. You can bet on America's number one game with America's number one sportsbook

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are really talented and just had more talent all over the place and actually played really well. I thought Hertz was good. They used AJ Brown correctly. Barkley was incredible. Their defense made a couple, you know, we cut with those yet another punch fumble play a couple stops when they needed it. There's a different version of this game without a couple of the turnovers that I think would have been really fun to watch if it was,

the Washington with, within a score with 10 minutes left with the ball. But instead it became a, an absolute blowout. I, I don't feel terrible about picking Washington, but you knew in the first quarter it was a bad pick. Well, except for that first drive, they did everything you could ask for them. Right. So I wrote for Washington. My big thing was Philly's going to run the ball when Daron Payne went out. I'm like, this is going to be a disaster. And especially because

Washington has won time of possession the last two times. I think it was 34-26 against... Yeah. Last week against the Lions and 36-24 against Tampa. Maybe I mixed those two up. But they're not going to win that. They're not going to win time of possession. It was dead even. I was a little bit wrong about that because it was dead even time of possession. But that first drive, you must have been excited when he's converting fourth and twos and fourths and threes. It was great. 14 plays. Then we settled for a field goal. That sucked. But I also don't know why they went for a field goal. Like they...

They were surviving fourth and threes all the way down the field, and they have a shady kicker. Yeah, it was like Dan Quinn ran out of plays. I was really surprised they went for it. I know the book probably said it was a wash, take the points, all that stuff. But the longer they're on the field, the longer the Eagles offense isn't on the field. Right. And then Barkley crushes their spirit three plays later. Barkley gets it. De'Ami Brown has the punch fumble. Eagles score again. Washington's about to punt.

I thought it was the most obvious

I swear, I'm not just saying this. I was watching the line. Cause I was like, this is the most obvious fake punt situation I've ever seen. Cause they know if they're putting it back. And I'm watching it. And I was watching the whole play develop and I'm like, Oh, they're doing it. Like as it was happening, it was in the Eagles were completely blindsided, which I didn't really understand. But then they ended up settling for, I thought they were, they laid one guy to cover two guys. Yeah. But so, Oh man, it was such a good throw. I think that it was like the,

Because there was like two tight ends going out. And he had to judge the way the middle linebacker. And he just shifted towards the guy on the right. And then he completed and it was a good throw and everything else. But yeah, they should have been a little more prepared. But kudos. And they only got three out of that, right? That made it 14-6? Yeah, I wrote down it was 14-6. Washington had run 30 plays. And Philly had won seven. And Washington was losing by eight. And then Elliott missed the field goal. McLaurin scores.

It's 14, 12 and Washington goes for two, which I didn't understand at all. Even though like, I don't understand how you're not going for the fourth and three. Yeah. Right. Then you're going for the two. It's second quarter. Who cares if it's 14, 13. So they don't get that. And then you start doing the math. 14, 12. Oh, this is going to be a two score game soon.

Um, and then Philly made a couple of big plays. Like AJ Brown had that big fourth and five catch. I thought Hertz was good. Like if, if Hertz had shown what he showed today in previous games, I probably would have taken Philly, but I didn't, we hadn't seen it.

For sure. I mean, we saw how successful he is with this team in the playoffs when he throws for 130 and 140, 150. And this one, this is the anomaly or I don't know, the outlier game. Because what did he throw for this? He threw for over 200, 246. Yeah. And a couple of big runs running for three touchdowns. So, yeah, I was like with that with that field goal miss. I was like, you're playing right into Washington's hands. Like, I feel like with this team on third and sixth.

They should run every time on third and six or third and five. They're going to go for it on fourth and one or two and make it instead third and six. The one thing he can't do is get sacked. And he did. And then, uh, what's his name? Mrs. The field goal. And that was, and that was, uh, I was like, all right, they're back in it. But yeah, it was just too much, too much firepower. Eventually 20 and 12 under two minutes left. And the guy fumbles the kickoff and gives Philly the ball. Now it's 27, 12, it's 2012, uh,

Minute 44, I feel like that could have gone down and gotten a field goal and it's 20-15 halftime. Instead, it's 27-15 halftime. And then Philly gets the ball and they stop them top of the third quarter. But then Washington just kind of flamed out. They got the three and out and then Philly got the touchdown. That was that. And then right when it seemed like Philly or Washington might be able to drive down and get the super fun cover, Eckler fumbled.

Right. And that was that. I thought Daniels was a winner in the game regardless. I thought he was really, really good. And a couple of the fact that they put that team together with duct tape kind of got exposed in 3. Great season for them, though. It's such a tough spot, right? A rookie just can't, especially in Philly, to go to Detroit and Philly and do that and be down offensive lineman. Four straight road games. Yeah.

They lose their best guard and they lose their run stuff or going into Philly. And yet I kind of needed to see it from Philly. I wasn't positive they had it like just in general. Like I, you know, were they going to do weird shit?

Um, well, it hurts was good, but then you hear about him showing up in a knee brace and I started getting PTSD from the Tyson Paul fight. I'm like, Oh, Tyson showed up with a knee brace and I lost a lot of money. I don't know. Maybe this isn't a good idea. Well, then they have this weird center situation where one guy's got the knee brace and the other guy has a bad back and right. And Brady kept talking about it. Cause I think he, you know, he's, he knows how important the center is because he played QB that never really mattered.

Yeah, especially with the tush push and everything. I hate that we have to say tush push. My God. So do we need to ban this play? Or is it just not going to be until somebody breaks their back in a tush push and then they're like, we have to stop this. Somebody was seriously hurt. So I want to know what year they brought it back because it was banned, right? You couldn't pull a guy. You still can't pull a guy, right? Even though they don't call it a lot. And there was a time when you couldn't push it. So you couldn't.

push. So I don't know. It doesn't jive with the current rules about like, all right, we don't want guys hitting each other's heads in the wedge and we want safety. We care about physical safety. Yeah. Also, it doesn't look like a football play and it's boring. And then they have a little problem on their hand with what Washington was doing. I think the whole world that wasn't rooting for Philly was like, good, keep hitting them, keep hitting them, keep getting the personal foul. And then the ref admonished them and was like, we're going to spank you. There's going to be a spanking that goes on here.

If you do it again, we're going to give them a touchdown. So you give them the touchdown so we don't have to give them a touchdown. It's so weird. So would you get rid of it? Because Buffalo tried a couple of times and it didn't work. I'm the wrong guy to ask. I hate it. I don't like it either. The team I hate most uses it most effectively. But I don't like it. Someone's going to have to get hurt, though, I think. I think that's the problem with this, right?

Eagles big picture. Do you feel better about them than you did a week ago? Or do you feel like Washington outkicked its coverage and gave a valiant underdog effort? But this is what happens. This is the March Madness team that made the final four. Now they're playing UNLV in 1990 and it's Larry Johnson and Stacey Ogman. They're going, oh, all right, this is running out now. I like that. You're such a college basketball fan. I think it's a little of both.

Definitely Washington, the Cinderella thing, it came to an end. But I do feel pretty good about Philadelphia and the trenches there. And they could, you know, I'm not saying I'm taking Philly, but they could present problems like Tampa Bay did to Kansas City in that Super Bowl, where Mahomes is just running for his life. And there'll be one highlight where he's horizontal to the ground completing a pass, but otherwise it's a long night.

So they were, they were excellent. I mean, what'd they have? 229 on the grid. They averaged like 6.4 carry. Well, Saquon, who's, if they win the Superbowl, I think we'll go down as the most popular Philly athlete, just moving into that, basically taking the Bryce Harper spot, but in the Pantheon of like guys that the Philly fans love. He was 15 for 118 and three TDs today. The touchdown was spectacular. The first one last week, it was 26 for 205.

So in the two games, he's 41 for 323 with five touchdowns. And it's like,

You remember in the late 90s when Terrell Davis was just ripping off these crazy postseasons. With the stats, you go back and you look and you're like, holy shit. That's why he made the Hall of Fame for those two years. And this feels like a very Terrell Davis-y postseason. Yeah, he should start saluting. And the question you posed earlier, did he do a good deed for all running backs or just for himself and Derrick Henry? I mean, it's a tough decision for GMs

the rest of the way, but he did make a difference. I mean, the Eagles are much better because they got Barkley and he only had, like you said, 15 carries. Like that's bizarre. They could add another a hundred yards if he had another 10. His rookie season. I think I said to you on this podcast that I thought he was the best running back I've ever seen. And we fought about it. And then it became a clip that got, well, we just argued about it. I was like, this is the best running back I've ever seen.

Um, I'll, I'll send out the, it's somewhere on Twitter. Um, and we cut a social clip about it. And then when he hurt his knee and then he was in the giants and it became one of those, like, Oh my God, that was one of my worst takes. But now I think, I think I'm back. I'm back in it with the take, like what running backs that you've seen in your life, um,

I guess the one thing with him, the pass catching, like he even dropped the one today. The pass catching is a little iffy with him. I still have Peyton as the best running back I've ever seen. Only Barry Sanders, Peyton, and for a small stretch, Terrell Davis, like you brought up. I don't really think... Yeah, Terrell Davis is in there. I still think for one game, Emmitt has to be...

discussed seriously if it's like yeah that's 22 degrees outside yep and i need a running back who will rush the ball 35 times today who's your pick i'd probably take emmet so i guess it would depend terrell is still the most dominant um running back on a good team i've seen just felt like it was six yards every time peyton was the best all-around just special running back but barkley's wait it's it's it's a little video game-ish with him

This is a crazy year. Like this is, you know, I know they're not going to give him MVP, but 2000 plus. Yeah. Is he going to get 2000 in the playoffs also? I don't know. Could he get to 2500 for the regular season playoffs combined? Oh, I think so. Yeah. It's in there, right? Well, no, it'd be, he'd need like 150. And what's interesting is he gets screwed because of the, you know, the one yard plunge by Jalen Hurts, right? He had three of those. Otherwise, like Barkley would probably have like 30 touchdowns.

Oh shit. I forgot that they played. What did he have in the green Bay game? Oh, 25 for one 19. Yeah. So he's,

So he's been over 100 in the three games. So yeah, he'll get two or three before that. The last regular season games. It was spectacular. So he'll get over 2,500 combined. Yeah. So who's your number one running back ever? Is it TD? Well, I don't know. I mean, just from what I've seen, I think we missed a lot of Walter Payton's greatness, right? But I'll trust it. And if we want to keep going back to Jim Brown. I mean, he wasn't on, I promise you, he wasn't on the East Coast more than twice a year for his entire prime. But,

You always knew he, the clips are amazing. The NFL film stuff was amazing. And then the way everyone talked about how he's the best blocking running back ever. He's the best pass guy. Like he checked all these boxes that nobody in that era was like that. Tomlinson hit some of that stuff too, but I was, yeah, the Peyton stuff is the most fun NFL films to me other than Barry Sanders.

For sure. But like short yardage is so important now. I would say Davis and Barkley over like a Barry Sanders. But Barry Sanders is spectacular in his own right too. Well, my Barry Sanders take, I've done this before, but my Barry Sanders take is probably in your wheelhouse. Yeah. I'm like in the, probably the minority, but I would rather have Emmitt Smith than Barry Sanders. Yeah. I'd rather have the four, five, six yards of pop than the guy who every once in a while can run for 70. Yeah.

but was always looking to break the big play. I've had a million arguments. Oh, I used to get in fistfights over this when I loved Emmitt more than Barry Sanders. And I don't think anyone has as many negative, carries for negative yards as Barry Sanders, but there was something. I mean, you just go by, SportsCenter highlights were so important back then. So we have Jalen Hurts in the second Super Bowl, which is twice as many appearances as Matt Stafford, Drew Brees,

Dan Marino, Aaron Rodgers. Wow. We have Nick Sirianni in the Super Bowl where it looked like he was going to get fired in September and early October. And since then, I think they've lost once against Andy Reid, who is now 28 and 16 in the playoffs in his sixth Super Bowl and starting to really legitimately breathe down Belichick's neck. And his breath smells like barbecue.

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Could be your next all-star player. So hire smarter in the new year. Find your next great hire on LinkedIn. Post your job for free at linkedin.com slash Simmons. Once again, linkedin.com slash Simmons to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. What's new Guest Alliance? Because Guest Alliance is brought to you by Hookah and Bondi9, their new daily trainer. Bondi9. What was your favorite Bondi?

I like seven. I thought it jumped the shark around after that. Now it's back. Bondi 9 is the best one they've had. Guess the lines. You already won. You won your first title. I got to say...

My team has noticed a lot of talk with this win, and now we're rededicated for next season. Oh, I made a nice little breakout clip of it. And yeah, I don't know what the NFL could do about this. I won like 10 years in a row, and I just sheepishly accepted my trophy and just kept my head down. That was your fault. Thank my fans. Shouldn't have done that.

You won once and you're talking a lot of shit. So next year it's on baby. This is a big freaking deal. And I don't know that, like I said, the NFL has a problem because now this is a waste of a week. I don't know what they could do scheduling wise to make this interesting with me having won the title. Well, you know what's really annoying? The NBA.

I agree. Has their trade deadline the Thursday of Super Bowl week. Oh, really? When it should either be this week or next week. Like just for content, the NBA just shoots themselves in the foot over and over again. I've never seen anything like it. Right. Why would you have your trade deadline during Super Bowl week? It's so fucking stupid. Are they announcing it in the parking lot of media day? Like how close are they getting? How much attention do they need?

I don't understand it. Like by Thursday, everyone is either at the Super Bowl or talking about the Super Bowl. I just don't get it. I don't understand how they screw up shit like this. It doesn't matter. You think Jimmy Butler's going to the Dodgers? Yeah, they get everybody. Guess the lines. Chiefs, Eagles. And I'm going to say, it's in New Orleans, I'm going to say Chiefs by two and a half.

Okay. I said, I've not seen it yet. Swear. I've said it has to be one and a half because every line has been one and a half this year. And I'm going to say the Chiefs are favored. And so now let's look.

I pulled out my starters, by the way. Joe Milton made that guess. Yeah. Well, you should have. It is one and a half. Of course. It's the biggest practical joke in sports gambling. Chiefs are favored by one and a half. Why did the football scores get so weird? We never had 29 versus 29-29 in the fourth quarter. Never happened our entire childhood.

Like everything's weird. The lines are weird. Everything's weird. And not only that, I was like, oh, 29, 29. All right. The one and a half isn't going to come into play. And then like we, you, me and Hench, we listed like 10 ways. The one and a half can come into play. Oh, the bills can miss the extra point. Oh, the, the, the chiefs could go for two and like, oh yeah, I forgot. It's the NFL one and a half. That's it for guess the line. That's not it for the Bondi nine, which delivers peak plushness for everyday miles overhauled from top to bottom.

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Barkley over under. Can I guess somebody? Yeah, do it. Yeah. Barkley over under. I'm going to say 85 and a half. No. What is it? 114 and a half. What? Yeah. You just read his stats. They can't give that to free money. He's playing the Chiefs. I mean, Cook almost had that, right? What did James Cook have today? I don't even know. It was 70, 80, somewhere in there. What else do you want to see? James Cook had 85 yards. Yeah. Why was that a bad guess?

114 is a lot for the Super Bowl. That means you're probably winning if you rush for 114. They can't give him 15. They can't give him the ball 15 times. Plus, the Chiefs can kind of try to jam the line and make him Florida Devonta Smith. I dare you. I'm betting the under. Okay. Do they have Mahomes rushing attempts yet? Because that's my favorite bet. Oh, okay. You got to be careful. He had 11 rushes today. That bet hits every single time. Mahomes at the playoffs first.

rushing attempts is the safest prop in sports. I'm not seeing a rush attempts yet. Oh, wait. Oh, yeah, I do see it. Okay. What do you think? I think they jack it up to like five and a half because it keeps hitting. Oh, they jacked it even further. Six and a half.

I still like it. The over's a plus, but we'd like this bet more than Mahomes rushing yards, right? Because of the nail-down factor. He takes gigantic... The nail-down factor kills the rushing yard thing. They got to figure that out. But you get three free. We didn't talk about that moment today when the official...

was slapping the, uh, slapping the Washington with the newspaper. Cause they kept jumping off sides and he's like, if this happens one more time, I didn't say we're awarding a score to Philadelphia. So what, what would have happened from a gambling standpoint?

Who gets the score? Oh, right, right, right. We were trying to figure that out. Is there a way we could have bet on this? Somebody like, could we bet on this at the Superbowl? Philly's no, no player on Philly scores and touchdown. Yeah. The scolding score. Does the center get it? I'm not sure. That's, that's good. Cause it's like an own goal kind of, right? I, have you ever seen a ref say that before? I didn't even know that was not even close. They made that up. Yeah.

It's not a lot of brotherly love being sent that way. One other play was that the measurement, and again, the Chiefs won because they're better and everything else.

The measurement on that fourth down where the line judges... The two refs. Yeah. Wildly different. And they just don't measure anymore. They don't take those chains. They're embarrassed of the chains. Like, why don't they measure? So, like, they guessed. And then that guess has to be conclusively overruled to change. Like, measure it. Put it down. First of all, there's not a chip in the ball. I think the ball wasn't hitting the hash mark and the...

the chain was actually on the hash mark. So they knew it, just missed it. Interesting. All right. This is a $500 billion league. Put a fricking chip in the ball. Like it's one thing if the guy's knee is down, but if we're really just measuring to see where the ball, the furthest the ball got,

I think we could do that. Wow. You're a put a chip in the ball guy. Well, what are we doing? The chain. Do you get along with the, make the goalpost hires guys? Do you guys have meetings together or you're like rival gangs? There's a big meeting. It's also an AA meeting. So yeah, it's a, well, we're bringing chains out there. Like these guys are surveyors in the 1650s. It's a little stupid. So what do we have for the over under? Can I guess that one? Oh yeah. Sure. That's easy. That's right there. I mean, not easy. 49 and a half. Now I lost it.

49 and a half is exactly right. You know what? I'll give you a win for this week. I'll give you that win for that. I got one. Yeah. So the two games today went crazy over. Oh yeah. Yeah.

I mean, by over by 15, 20 points, usually there was a lot of dialogue about, well, Eagles, Washington, each team only gets seven possessions. There'll be these slow games. I know that's wrong. And then Casey Buffalo just, they kept moving the ball up and down the field. And last week was it the over four and out? No, Chiefs Texans went under, but we had Eagles Rams had 50, Bill's Ravens at 52 and the Lions commanders at 76. So yeah, you had like five out of last six go over in cold weather. Most of those games.

So for a Super Bowl rematch, there's not a lot of those either. Pat's Giants was probably the most famous one of this century, but we've had some other ones. When we were growing up, Steelers-Cowboys was like an exciting rematch. I think I get the feeling people now don't like rematches as much. Like the Casey-Philly, we've already done this. We've already done the Jalen Hurts thing. People like to complain. We've already done the Holmes thing. Yeah, like Buffalo or Washington being in there would have been content fodder.

Right. But I think this is a really good game. It's great. And first of all, Fox is delighted. The NFL is delighted, right? Because you got Hurts, you got Barkley, you got Mahomes, you got Taylor, everything. If the Rizzler shows up again, I don't know. But I think the casual fan probably is bummed about this matchup a little bit. No question. I think maybe Cowboys Chiefs would bum them out a little more. But other than that, I think this is right up there.

My son who follows football on TikTok and through YouTube shorts, he watched most of the second half with me. And at one point he turned to me and said, dad, isn't every football season the same? Like the Bills come super close and then they lose. The Chiefs make the Super Bowl. They play somebody from the other team. It seems good. Then the Chiefs win. And I was like, nope, you're wrong. I'm going to lie to you right now. Nope. That's not true at all, son.

Every season is way different. There's no chip in the ball. Of course it's the same. Yeah, no. Jaden Daniels, you never know, son. Jaden Daniels last week in Detroit. You shocked the world, son. McDermott's not going to blow this game. Well, you could just tell him that every year he could rely on a great AFC title match, right? Like seven of the last nine have been decided by seven points or fewer.

My son, I always impressed my son by predicting what plays are going to happen. I've been playing a lot of Madden lately. I'm like, Oh, empty back. I think he's going to, and half the time, that's how predictable some of these plays are though. I think it's actually a bad sign if I'm on my couch and I can figure out where the ball's going half the time.

Like the, the, uh, especially on those like swing screen passes, you can kind of see, do you do that when you're watching the games? Do you try to predict what they're going to do? Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone wants to be like Romo in that regard. I just can't when I get it anymore.

Yeah, I think he's, you know, I don't know, because people are assholes and they're like, we don't want to hear what's about to happen. So stop circling the screen. I don't think he was told to stop, but I think he's just like, forget it. The one I got wrong, I would have bet my life on, it was before the Samuel touchdown when Buffalo tied it. It was like third and goal from the five. I would have bet my life that Allen was going to do the QB draw on that play. Was going to take off. Yeah. I just think it's been so obvious.

They've been relying on it to the point that I think even they realize they probably can't do it. Can I ask you when the shotgun from the one started? Listen, you know my least favorite plays are fourth and goal or fourth and short, fourth and one. The QB not over the center.

To me, you're like just throwing away an advantage. Who started it? Did it start in college? Was it like Vince Young or like Tebow? Like it wasn't that long ago. I mean, it wasn't, you know, it wasn't like in the 70s or 80s. I really feel like it's. It's the cousin of it's a tie NBA game with under 10 seconds left and they do the ISO where then the guy does a step back three to win the game. Mm hmm.

but it was a tie game. It's like, we just need a basket. We don't need to do your step back 27 footer. Yeah. Um, same thing for the shotgun snap. I don't understand it. I don't know. I also don't understand why my homes doesn't sneak, which we always talk about. Right. Cause he got hurt that one time, like five years ago, like they can't sneak them anymore. Right.

He can't just lean down and burrow in and go for half a yard. Yeah. Although I'll say that fourth and two where they rushed up to the line after a timeout and he rolled right. It's like, wow, this guy's got it, man. This is why it's so freaking hard to beat them. It's really impressive. We have two weeks to talk about the Super Bowl on your podcast, on my podcast. People are going to be in New Orleans, a whole bunch of things. You have a new Cowboys coach.

Oh, we can skip. We can go right to parent corner, right? We don't have to talk about this. You hired Marty Schottenheimer's son, Brian. They are related. I had a feeling. I wouldn't say Brian was a red hot coaching candidate, which might be a good thing or a bad thing. He's the kind of guy I would have expected. Oh, the Patriots have hired Brian Schottenheimer as the QB coach for Drake May. I'd be like, good hire, veteran. He's your head coach. I don't understand it.

Why didn't you hire Cliff Kingsbury? At least he's like from Texas and he's young and you could make excuses for the first job. It's like, maybe you didn't get along with Kyler Murray. Like I don't understand Brian Schenheimer at all.

I don't, I don't understand it either. And nothing against the guy. I'll, I'll give him a chance. I hope he does well, but I really think Jerry Jones is fucking with us. I mean, the way he's even introduced them, he's like, ah, he was known as a career assistant. It's like, yes. Yeah. Great. Jerry. That's a career assistant. That's what he said. That's how he is. He's not just Brian anymore. He's the head coach. I'm like, you just don't care about us. You don't care about this team. This is just a joke.

I kind of want to enter the fan trend, you know, the portal. I really want to get into the portal and pick a different. Now, look at the Washington fans this year. You got to stay with your stay with the marriage. Stay with your bad, unhappy marriage. Hate watch the Washington team until they switched ownership. And now he gets a seat in the luxury box courtesy of Washington. I'm like, all right, I'll do that. Like, why can't I just.

Watch from afar. This is disgusting. Brian Schottenheimer, like you said, wasn't on anybody's list. It's like in fantasy, if you're doing like a snake draft and someone drafts like in the seventh round drafts like Ray, Ray McLeod. And you're like, oh, wait, hold on. I'm still looking down my list to cross. Right. You're making the joke. I got to get to page 12. Keep going. Got to keep going. Like there's something to be said about at least going through the motions and interviewing a Kellen Moore or Jones broke. What's good?

Like, is it possible he doesn't have as much money anymore because he paid Mike McCarthy to the last minute of the contract and then just let it expire. And then he's obviously trying to save money with this coaching hire. Really weird. He's an actor. There are better versions of this guy out there. Maybe the landman thing. I think he said that. He's like, I'm an actor. I can fall back on that if the team's bad and the team will be bad. Yeah.

That's just nonsense. Well, it was an interesting one because the Jets interviewed, I think, 230 possibilities for their head coach. And I don't even think he cracked that list. And they were interviewing people that you didn't even know were still professionally working. Yeah. He's our guy. He's been in the building three years and they still have to interview him. The funny part is that they actually interviewed him. Like, yeah, I think you know what you're getting with him. It's fine. But

Uh, I'm so does the interview start like Brian, what went wrong with your career? Why are you still here, Brian? Why did it peak five years ago? Uh, conversely, I'm on an absolute high with the Patriots again.

Why not? This Vrabel, Vrabel's putting together this awesome coaching staff. That's like the complete opposite of what we had last year. We have all these overqualified, like we have Doug Marone. Doug Marone, like almost beat the Pats in a play in a round three playoff game five years ago. Like he was a good head coach. Um, I'm really pumped.

I really feel like, I think the Washington thing has given all the Pats fans so much energy that it's like, they did this in a year. They just, they hit the quarterback, they did all that. So now I'm going to be more into this NFL draft than I was last year. It's so funny how Washington has affected other teams near the bottom. Right. And yeah, the exact opposite effect on Dallas because now we have Jayden Daniels in our division for anywhere from next year to the next 12 years. Right. And, uh,

And we celebrate. He even took a win today, I felt like. I thought he was, you know, he maybe a couple of passes were a little low. But for the most part, like his poise and the way he kind of kept them at that two point conversion he had was great. I just thought he still seems very, very cool. It's very cool. Never freaks out.

through a couple bad passes, but it's to be expected. I mean, how many weeks are you going to do this for? Well, the cool thing for us, selfishly, just like for the Sundays where we're trying to watch all these games at once, we just want as many fun QBs as we can get. And now it seems like at least May and Daniels are two more to the list. Hopefully, Caleb can get there. You know, hopefully, Herbert will...

take some sort of leap. Hopefully the new Jacksonville coach will resuscitate Lawrence. Like we might get into a situation where half of the teams have a fun QB. Wouldn't that be something? Yeah. I think JJ McCarthy's good. Fun, fun QBs and Dax coming back and bad coaches. Shut up. Or what's going to keep guests lines going for another 17 years.

Well, the one thing we know is we're always going to have bad owners and bad coaches. By the way, the Celtics, here's a little tidbit. The Celtics, it was the first round of the buyers that they had to cut down all the prospective buyers. I don't know, five people made the first round, four or five people. One of the people was the Eagles owner. Really? Jeffrey Lurie, who's apparently from Massachusetts. So he was...

He was, uh, they, cause there's been a couple like, Hmm, I wonder who these guys are. And there was a couple I couldn't figure out, but that's, that's one that, uh, do you like that? I mean, that happened with your red socks too, right? Isn't there like the whole, so the precedent is Josh Harris own the, own the Sixers and then bought Washington's football team, the Crockies own the nuggets and he on the ramp. So there's been a couple of NBA NFL things, but I mean, I always thought the Eagles were one of the best run teams.

football teams right so if if uh if he bought the Celtics that's a decent outcome there's a couple decent outcomes in this it's so funny how there's only like a few owners there's only a few quarterbacks to get and there's only a few coaches if you don't get them you're kind of screwed yeah and you're way more likely to have a mediocre to bad coach and a bad owner um

All right. Anything else before we hit parent corner? Oh, are you, did you hit the sad point of the season yet? Where you're just going to like wrestling tournaments on a Saturday and thinking about how you have no games. That is pretty sad. I told you when you can't make a three team teaser, unless you use the over under that is a, that that's a milestone. Yeah. Official sadness day. Really bad. Really sad. And after next week, after we do our prop podcast, that'll be sad too. It's a, it's a step. I'm going to do.

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So that's my middle kid. And my youngest kid has travel baseball and rec league basketball. So Saturday I have to go from Jack basketball. Yeah. Oh, he's all about basketball too. It's fun. It is fun at that age. Yeah. Running around. So Saturday I have to go from Jack's tournament to Harrison's basketball game. I'm about, I'm going to catch just the end of his basketball game. So I walk in there. Uh, it's the fourth quarter. Uh,

And I see my wife's there and the game, it's 18, 17. And she's talking to this woman seated next to her. And I have no idea who the woman is. And I mentioned that. I was like, wow, the gym seems tense. And my wife's like, yeah, the refs aren't calling anything. These kids are really going at it. And then she goes back to talking to this woman that I don't know. So, and then it's clear to me, I'm like, well, she must be guessing that the refs aren't

calling anything because she's not watching a second of this. And so I'm starting to get annoyed. I'm like, it's 18, 17 with like two and a half minutes left. Like Harrison's taking shots and he's playing defense and everything. But anyway, okay. So she's still talking to this woman. There's eight seconds left. We're up by three. The opponent inbounds it, dribbles down the court, runs down the court. And just before he pulls up for the three, Harrison hard fouls him before he goes into shooting motion. And I was like, that's freaking smart.

That's like one of the smartest things. The announcers must have loved it. The announcers loved it. The gym did not love it. The referees didn't love it either. And everyone's like, oh, oh boy. But now there's like 0.6 on the clock. What was the hard foul? Was it like a shove or was it like a karate chop? Right, right. Shove to the chest, maybe a little elbow. Kid's off balance. This is great. Before, way before the shot, definitely before the shot, but he saw that the kid was about to pull up and there's 0.6 on the clock and there's like no...

It's not a shooting foul and they're just going to inbound it. And the ref like mildly scolds Harrison, much like the refs did to, to, sorry, who played Philly today or already lost Washington when they were jumping off sides over and over. But he's like, game's over.

And, uh, and so that was it. And everyone's like, Oh man. Oh boy. All right. So I was like, Oh geez. I'm like, I can't wait to high five them in private later. Like a small fist pump. Yeah. And then the kid who we shoved is like crying, um, after the game. And I say, and I'm like, now I'm by my wife and this woman, I'm like, Oh God, look at this. This kid's crying now. And she turns to me and mouths. That's,

That's this woman's son. His name is Bob. I'll say Bob.

because I don't want to say the real name, but that's off by one letter. She's like, that's Bob and this woman's son. I'm like, oh shit. Now she's looking at me. And so now I have to eat shit a little bit. Like I let like a minute pass and I go up to her after the game and I'm like, hey, I just want you to let you know, Bob played a great game. And she's giving me the look like, yeah, I fucking saw you walk in like with four minutes left in the game. Don't give me this crap. You didn't even see him play. Oh, you made it worse. I made it worse. She didn't say that, but she gave me that look. But anyway,

Talking to Harrison afterwards, I'm like, look, you're not supposed to foul. I was like, dad, we lost a game like that last week. I wasn't going to let him get the shot off. That's my boy. That's good hard-nosed stuff. I like it. That's it. So I'm the jerk again. You know, so 10 and 11, Harrison's 11? Yeah.

Those are really emotional ages for boys sports. There's a lot more crying than I was ever prepared for, like in the baseball and the basketball, like kids really melt down.

Yeah. It made me, it made me think how funny it would be if like we did this as adults. Like if it was like in the game today, like Don Cacade drops the pass, he's just sobbing on the sidelines. When did they grow out of that at age 12? Well, what's interesting with basketball from 10 to 11, which makes it even more intense at 11, they start, they start calling double dribble a lot and they start calling, uh,

travel and I, and you could play backcourt defense. So it gets pretty rough and stupid. Um, yeah, 10, 10 and under, you couldn't play defense until we crossed half court. Yeah. Cause I, I was visiting our cousin Jimmy yesterday, uh, in South Bay. And, uh, I called you to see if you were around and I just heard whistles in the background and I'm like, Oh, I forgot on Saturday. You just drive around to different sporting events. Yeah. That was it.

My parent corner. So my wife went away for a couple of days with some friends. She still lives here. It's not a Michelle Obama thing. And I was left alone with me and Ben and the dog, Murph, who if you've noticed has not been really on parent corner all year because he's four. Like he really is blossomed into a great dog, mature, no accidents. We have no gates in any of the rooms in the house, anything like that.

Well, um, my son had, uh, had a friend over and they made a cake and, uh, it was a female friend and, um, he left the, the, you know, there's the frosting left. I think he left the frosting on the counter, but maybe not enough distance for Murph not to get it. So I come home on, on Thursday and in the, in the TV room, um,

There's just the remnants of something. And it's like white. It almost looks like somebody spilled cocaine powder. And I'm like, what is that? I'm smelling it. And it just smells like icing. And I'm like, oh my God, Ben. So now I'm on Murph watch. Nothing's happening. Nothing's happening. And then Saturday morning, the apocalypse. I noticed him sneak away a couple of times. Usually he's always where I am. Right. If I'm home and I noticed him sneak away a couple of times. Like that's where Murph, where are you going? He's like, I'll be right back.

It was a poopocalypse. My, my office that I'm in right now, multiple shits. I could smell it. Our, our living room, which we had a gate so that nobody could go in there. That was a dog for months and months. And finally, we don't need the gate. It's ugly. Murph never goes in there. Double shit on the, on the rug in there. Um, the, the, uh, what was the other place? Oh, and then the TV room.

Like ruin the rug. Like so three different shits. And I had already closed the doors for it. So anyway, we have this machine that I would recommend anybody as a dog who likes to shit in their house. This water tank machine where you can scrub it and it picks the shit up. And I saved two of the rugs, but I haven't saved the third one.

And, uh, and he ruined it. And so last night I was like, I, so I didn't have a good night's sleep Friday night. I'm like last night. I'm like that. Hopefully the shit's done. I lock all the doors. He's locked in, in our bedroom. There's no rug for him to pee on the bathroom doors, clothes or poop on bathroom doors, clothes. There's nothing he can get to. And I'm like, now I can just get a good night's sleep. We've got the pod tonight with the two games. Like, I just want to be like rested and prepared. Fall asleep at one o'clock.

Like 2.45, I just hear him circling around in the room, which means he has to go. So bring him down. It's pouring rain. Goes out. He does whatever. Comes back. Towel him off. Hour and a half later, we repeat it again. 5.45. Let's do it a third time. And now I'm up. And I've been up since 5.45. So I don't know what I look like. But three shits.

And I haven't told my wife because she's away. And so I guess this is, if she hears this, this is how she's going to find out. So who will get in person? Well, did you reprimand your son or no? Oh, he's like, it wasn't my fault. He shouldn't have jumped on the counter. I'm like, no, it's a hundred percent your fault. If you leave something on the counter that like, if you left poison on the counter and he ate it and he died, is that his fault or yours? He's a dog. He has an IQ of 20. So I've been mad at him all weekend. Right. Um, and, um,

just like, like I, I've never picked up this many shit. So it was like, he had never shit in the house. And then it was like a year and a half of shit saved up. Jesus. Just dropping them everywhere. So anyway, Murph's back. What, what the, what'd they make a wedding cake? What the fuck? How much ice did he? I don't understand. And then I was like, do I have taken him to the vet today? Yeah. And I'm like, I'm not fucking taking the vet. The games are about to come on. If he dies, he dies. I was like, rock. It was like Drago. It's a creed. Um,

But, uh, but it was just like, and I actually felt bad for him. Cause last night I just, I was like, I'm not even bringing it in. Just stay outside for two hours. And then I kind of forgot about him. I was watching a movie for rewatchables. And then I remember I heard him barking and came back down. I brought him in and he was like so emotionally destroyed. Yeah. You left me out there.

I didn't think you were going to come get me. So anyway, it's been a rollercoaster weekend and I've had, I think, three hours of sleep. Wow. Can I say something? You said... The lesson is don't get a dog. No, yeah, yeah. Wait on the dog or at least get that rug cleaner for sure. You said the dogs have an IQ of 20. This sounds like a smart dog. Like when you say like the dog left the room to do all this, he

He knew, he knew like that makes me think sometimes that dogs are smarter than humans. Like he had the wherewithal to be crafty enough or embarrassed enough or whatever it was to do it in another room for just temporary. It's almost like a cheating spouse where it's like, I'll be right back. I just got to go to the bathroom. And then they're on a phone call. I thought you said she went away with her friends. Oh, the dog, the dog. The dog. Yeah, yeah.

No, he's like, I'll be right back. Just going to go get some water. And it's like, what rug haven't I shit on yet? So anyway, I'm looking at our chat. What are they saying? People...

Chris Schemmer says, I love how Bill still contends he's never done blow. I've never done cocaine. I swear on my kids. I'm not even positive I've been in the same room with it. I'm very virginal with cocaine. I'm not going to ask you if you've done it. I've not done it. And I had the opportunity because I had gambling money once to loan my roommates who were dealing it money. It was like, you give me $150 and you can make 600. By the end of it, I was like,

I don't even, I, I don't know why I said no, but I started good. Wasn't even doing that. No. Yeah. So anyway, Murph, Murph ruined my weekend. Yeah. And it looked like, uh, the two bets were going to ruin my weekend. And then the chiefs came through, which brings us full circle. There we go. Can always count on the Kansas city chiefs to save your weekend, especially when they're the second team. I thought Romo was outstanding today. I want to mention that as well. Really good.

I really thought he did a great job. Romo, we were in rough shape with him a couple years ago. It just didn't seem like he was putting in the work, but it feels like he is. Well, I like it because even last week, a little tiny bit wishy-washy, I was like, oh man, is he just not a cold weather announcer? But no, he came back. I think he did cocaine. That's it for, that's it for Parent Corner. That's it. So next time I see you will be next Sunday. We're going to be doing our annual Super Bowl props.

I love that there's like 150 up already. It's not even Monday. This is terrific. It's amazing. We always used to have to wait, right? Until the second week. I have a quick NBA thing for you. You know we had that Pacers bet? Oh, yeah. Tell everybody what that is. Tell me. No, we did. Well, it's Pacers over Minnesota under Sacramento. We did like four weeks ago. Now it seems like Sacramento might screw us because we need them to be under 42 in. I think the Pacers...

are about to make a little run here. I'm just talking about from a gambling standpoint next couple weeks. I like when they have all their guys back. I just think there's something interesting about them that I've been monitoring. I love the teams in each conference. And I think Golden State's on the flip side. Did you see this stat? Golden State is 1-20 after the third quarter when they don't have a lead. To me, Golden State, if they don't make a trade, this season's a punt. What did we get the Pacers at?

Oh, we're going to hit that one. We got it at like 41 and a half. Okay, so it's 46 and a half, but you wouldn't double back on it, would you? That's too much. Oh, for regular season wins? Yeah. What's their record? That doesn't matter. Yeah, no, I don't know. Their record is... So they are 25 and 20. So 47, they'd have to go 22... 22 and 15. 22 and 15? Yeah. That's pretty good.

That seems like it comes out until last week. Yeah. Yeah, at least, well, we already have that. Yeah. Yeah. I was just wondering, I mean, so I don't even know how you play them at this point, but what more? 46 and a half is high. So we, so we definitely hit that one. Golden State is 41 and a half now. And unless they do a desperation trade, that one might be going under. The only other one that I think

I can't believe I'm saying this, but the Lakers look good in that Celtic game. I know. And then they look good against the Warriors. And I'm starting to wonder if maybe they found a little something because there's a physicality to them. I wrote them off. I thought they should have traded Anthony Davis and it's only two games. I'm not zigzagging, but I'm just watching them because I saw a team in that Boston game in person that,

It just seemed like they were figuring out an identity that I didn't think they had. And then they did the same thing against Golden State. This was a tough stretch. Like this physical team. Yeah, like they... Three of the last four... The next four games, they're in that four-game run where it was going to be tough. And I bet them to make the play-in. I'm like, oh, they're definitely going to get in the play-in because you could do that on Fandle. I'm like, now they're minus 225. Oh, you think they could actually make it? Well, now they're minus 225 to make the playoffs. So, yeah. Yeah, they're seven games over 500. Right. And...

I wasn't even considering them potentially being good until those last two games. Cause they're defending way better than they did. They have, they, they have enough shooters. Now Gabe Vincent's given them something that he was not giving earlier in the season. So I, it's,

I don't want to put playing a flag on it yet, but I might have been wrong about them. Well, I thought for sure once they let Bronny go to the G League, I'm like, that's a mistake. They're going to regret sending that generational talent somewhere else. And who knows if he even comes back if they want him. No, Bronny's the best thing that happens to go into Laker games now because people want to see him, but usually the game's over. Right. So I took Hench to the Laker game. We got out of there. We were out of the garage and like,

30 seconds. Cause every, it was like the easiest time. Yeah. Lakers are up 20. Usually people are fleeing, but everybody kind of wanted to stick around. Nice. Um, everyone just wanted Henge to leave. I think he was in rare form. Uh, yeah. The only other one is Cleveland. I was thinking about this for next year, that team that starts out super hot. Yeah. They're ridiculous. And then around the 40 game mark,

They're huge favorites in every game, but they relax a little bit and they lose a couple. And I want to remember that for next year. Atkinson is minus 470 for coach of the year. What would they have to, what kind of claps would they have to have for him not to win it at this point? Wow.

What's crazy is the Thunder coach is 30-1, and that guy's doing an amazing job. He lost Holmgren for the whole season, basically. But he won last year, though, right? I mean, I'm all for the guys that get votes, but I don't think they give it two years in a row too much. Joker at plus 230 for MVP on FanDuel seems like really good odds. As you know, I'm not allowed to bet. All right, you promised me you would get the vote. You give the vote. No, but I'll tell you, here's why. Because...

First of all, it's only game 45. Second of all, there's really only two candidates right now. But Denver's a four seed now. Like you can't win the MVP unless it's either a shitty year or you're like a top three team. They're probably going to be a top three team in the West.

which puts him in play and he's having this historic offensive season. It's at least an argument. So that's the hedge on Shea because I have Shea because of you, House and Rosillo. I got like plus 350. Now he's minus 350. Oh, when we were, we were telling people early. Yeah. Yeah. If you're just talking value. Yeah. It's a two person race. There's no one else. I would be really surprised. Oh man. I mean, Giannis is 120. Yeah. Everybody's triple figures. Anybody else?

Bizarre. No, it's those two. So if you wanted to hedge it, I would hedge it with Jokic. The rookie of the year is funny because all of a sudden Ware on Miami became the favorite because he was good for two weeks. Like that's how bad, I still, I still think Castle plus 310 is probably a little. I have Saar from the beginning of that year.

Yeah. And then most improved that one always changes right around like mid February. All of a sudden people get excited. Same for defensive player of the year. I think six man's a little more open than Pritchard being minus one 70. Cause he hasn't been, uh, like just looking at those odds, I'm in Thompson. Who's been incredible, especially lately. He's eight to one. Yeah. He's,

he's having a, I think a more impactful year than Pritchard is. You can argue Thompson's the best rocket right now. I mean, remember Westbrook was a big favorite or not Westbrook. Who'd they make? Was it Westbrook with six man? Did that make sense? Like a few years ago? And then like, yeah, it became a starter and then it went away. So that's what you have to avoid. Like which one of those top four can be getting the starting lineup.

Cuz, what do you got to plug? What do I have? Against all odds, a couple times this week, through the ringer with Tate Frazier, Cousin Sal's winning weekend at the end of the week, and Frontier Wireless blows, and their customer service reps are fucking liars. That's it. Bye. See you next week. Are you doing content with Tate this week? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you want me to ask him? Is he focused yet on Charlotte trading for Curry?

That was always his dream scenario. Oh, interesting. I don't know. He's all about Belichick. I don't think Golden State's ever traded Curry, but Tate's dream was Golden State was going to become mediocre. And at some point, the move was just to cash in Curry before, during the last stretch of his career. What does that look like? He goes back to Charlotte. First round pick? He grew up there. The number one? No, I know. But what did they have to give up? I think LaMelo's in it. Yeah. Two guys who never want to play. What a great trade.

Anyway, ask Tate. See what he thinks. All right. Thanks to Kyle and Gahal. Thanks to Saruti, even though he's not here. You can watch all of our stuff on YouTube. Please subscribe for us. And I got a new rewatch of us coming tomorrow. So that's the podcast. Sal, congrats on the Guest Alliance title again. Good job by you. Good job by you, buddy. And good job by the Chiefs. Thanks, everybody.

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