Side Stories: Movie Stories
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There's no place to escape to. This is the Lost Hot Toss. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started. Oh.

Side stories. Yes. Jodi Sweetin's got big teeth. I was expecting the rest of the word to be different. Because I'm classy. I look at this and the first thing I notice. Honestly, it's kind of rude. Hey, first thing I notice is she has very large fake teeth.

Are you sure they're fake? Veneers always are... She's got the chompers on them. She's got big teeth. I know it's partially because I know that she went through a little bit of a drug issue. So you got to clean them up. She had an addiction thing, so they have to go... It's kind of like when they...

There's some dentists that always got to huck fin the mouth. Yeah. You got to paint it all white. Got to put it back on. They put on their coveralls. New rafters. I have it on good authority that she's a wonderful person. I've heard the same. Yes. I just said nothing. I'm just saying. You made fun of her teeth. I said no. No. You put the qualifier. And I will not sit here. You put the qualifier of made fun. I just said. Oh, so you like big teeth on a person. I do. On a horse.

No, she said that. That's Jackie Zebrowski. She said that. Yeah, we might sound similar, but she said that. I think that Jodi Sweetin's very beautiful. I think that it's actually extremely gorgeous. I think it's extremely feminist of me. That's the first thing I noticed were her big honking, swinging teeth. I'm always thinking about that. She had big teeth as a kid. I don't know if they're fake. No, those are. Yes, of course they are fake. Those are fake. Those are child's teeth.

That's a children's mouth. Yeah, that's pre-braces right there. Yeah, no, no. They don't look great. She's got big... As a child. Now they look great. Awesome, supple, beautiful. She's got big...

She's got a pair of nice teeth. Also, Jodi Sweet. Huge pair of great teeth. Great teeth. She also always stands up to Candace Cameron Bure. Oh, wait, just that's where this came from. Yes, they're still friends. And I like it. That's what's so cool about it. I know. I love it. Well, we're already in page seven territory, aren't we? No, I started us. I like it. I like it. It's a good way to go in. I'm setting the tempo. Hi. Welcome to Side Stories. You hear a little... You hear a little noise going...

I'm just got veins. I got bad veins. Why are you bringing up my bad veins right now? It's a condition. I got bad veins. They had to be stripped from my legs. Hey, they sound like those veins? They got fired. You'd be horrible at heroin.

Man, I would be. Actually, technically, I'd be very good at heroin because I could just- Big, thick veins. Yeah, they're already popping. I don't even need to squeeze them up. I meant as like a superhero. Yeah. Oh, very bad heroin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's not brave. No one is looking to me for help. But I'm here. My name is Henry Zebrowski. I'm sitting here with my sister, Jackie Zebrowski. She's our special guest. I should have done you first, Eddie. I don't give a fuck.

Jackie laid his first. She's wonderful. Thank you. I'm happy to see you here, Jackie. Thank you. It's nice to be here, guys. It's nice to have you be seen here. I'm sad, but also happy that there's no pudding involved in this, but it is weird to be sitting next to you and there's no pudding. I think Good Puts is the funniest show on the network, by the way. Personal opinion. He's on Side Stories and Last Podcast on the web. And Brighter Side. Don't forget about my other show. And Hoop-A-Google Game.

Good puts the funniest show. I sit there and I cackle, I laugh. You don't get anything extra. I'm being nice. Jesus Christ, Henry. Try it once in your life. I'm sitting here with the weakened Ed Larson showing the weakest emotion, which is being nice.

Is that true? I don't know. I'll fucking kick your ass. That's how I like it. Do it, Eddie, do it. I'll be right behind you. I like this energy. See, that's what I'm talking about. Beat him up, Eddie. See, that's all I do. I'm like a conductor. That's the end of this show. You broke me. I play you both like instruments. Ah, yes, you are the piccolo. And Eddie's my big trombone. We know instruments.

Now, guys, today, the reason why I had Jackie here, and it's not just because it feels like I have to. And because I'm the more beautiful one, but you have, again, the bigger tits. We're trying to bring women onto Side Stories, and this is the bridge. The only one we know. This is the best you could get, yeah. This is the bridge to women. Yeah. Now, this is to show you were safe. Pretty sure the wives wouldn't do it. Well, it's just how long, how much more of the show do they need to receive? Um.

But today, the reason why we have Jackie here is because we wanted to talk. I got a couple of requests. Because, you know, it's our summer break. We got a couple of requests of a straight-up movie review episode. Okay. Because, like, Eddie and I, we watch a lot of movies. And I only know one other person that watches as many films as me. Who? Jackie Zabrowski. Yeah. With her Who's Bond episode.

Jeff Adams. Yes. AMC Stubbs represent. We're all Stubbs family. Stubbs represent. We're all Stubbs family. It's so stubby. But I do think that each one of us, I do find it interesting that each one of our wives refuses to join Stubbs. Julie's on Stubbs. Your wife is the only one we have to buy tickets for. She holds out. And I don't know why she won't join. Why does she hold out? It's why she's never invited to the movies. I have to use all my $5 points whenever she comes to the movies. That's what I do as well. It's eating me out of points constantly.

home oh it's eating you out of points huh sounds pretty great hell yeah you're disgusting no i'm sorry no sexual on this i'm not sexual today we are sexual i think okay no please let me slide right in i'm like 25 of the show so a quarter of the time you could be sexual all right well that's very okay i know percentages so we want to talk about movies

Because we love movies. We're interested in it. I feel that we hold the torch for many people that are into horror films, especially independent horror films. It seems like this is the perfect time for it. And the summertime is my favorite time to watch horror.

horror movies, even more so than the Halloween season. Yes, Summerween, baby! I love it during this, because you know what? Because they slide right in there under the radar all the time. All the time, and a lot of times they are summer movie fare, which I do love. I also think on Halloween, it's one of those where I think that we're on the clock.

On Halloween. You've got to get them in. We're spooky people. I've never done 30. 31 for 31, we're doing this year. Oh, we do it. I've never done 30. Oh, man. We do the 31 for 31 every year, and it's just such a race to the end. Can we put the Saw franchise in? Because I've never seen any of them. Love, you should. You should, because they're funny. They range in quality from shit to...

to not so shit. Highly recommend every year adding in a franchise into your 31 for 31. It really, it's changed the game. We always choose one franchise and we watch it from nuts to ass. Although Leprechaun was a choice. Well, Leprechaun I'm more excited for than Saw. Saw looks so bad to me. You know what you'd like about Saw? I feel like the first one is a very genuine torture film. I love the porn film. And he's great in it. Yes. It's a

great movie, but the lore that gets built, I feel like honestly And Morgan Freeman's in it too, right? No, that's, uh, you're thinking of The Bone Collector. Wow. I believe you're thinking Denzel's in The Bone Collector. George, who does he in? No, Morgan Freeman doesn't do that many horror films.

Yeah, he did Dreamcatcher. He did The Ritual Killer. That was last year? Yeah, he's on any of these films. Kiss the Girls. Kiss the Girls, again, ancient film. And also, that's not a horror movie. No, it's a thriller. This is one thing you have to understand. Also, very big difference between thrillers and horrors. Distinctly a massive difference between thriller and horror. But sometimes they're cousins or buddies. Oh, yeah, for sure. It could be a horror and a thriller. Long Legs.

Yes. I don't know. Was Long Legs a horror film? It is a thriller. It's supernatural. I think it's more of a thriller. Well, now we know that it's supernatural. I'm just going to say this straight up. There's going to be- A couple of little spoilers. There's going to be little spoilers. People already got mad- Nothing crazy. Slightly with our Long Legs coverage because I forgot to put on my long legs. Cuckoo.

Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Wait, are you talking about... You have to put your arms over your head. Are you talking about the movie with Hunter Schaefer Cuckoo? Cuckoo! That movie is also coming out this year. I'm excited for that. Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo!

No, we're talking about... Is that what you're doing? That's long legs. Cuckoo. You've seen long legs. I've seen long legs. You don't remember the scene when he does the cuckoo hand motion? No, I was remembering another scene, but I'm trying not to spoil it. You pee-pee? Yeah, I'm pee-peed in Wayne Pond, E-Band. The reason why you'd like Saw is that I think you'd like the lore that gets built out. Saw 2, in my opinion, is the weakest of the entire franchise. Come on.

because it's the worst of them. And then it's like, you would say the movie Seven. Seven is what, yes. That's what you were thinking of. Yes, Morgan Freeman. I mean, Seven, I know Seven. I wasn't thinking of Seven. I think he was thinking of Kiss the Girls for some reason. Mm.

Because honestly, I feel like those movies in that time period stand out in our brains because of going to Blockbuster and going to Hollywood Video. Like, I feel like I remember the VHSs. I bring up The Dentist 2 all the time. It was Danny Glover and Saw. Yes. Does that make me Batman? No. No. I think it's okay. It's allowed. There's a lot of them. They're just old. Yeah.

It was Danny Glover, not Morgan Freeman. Hey, I'm glad we cleared it up. All right, but you should try it. But what you were saying is true. Who directed Saw 2? Was it James 2? Cameron Boogaloo? Right? Because the first Saw was directed by who? James 1. Yeah. And the second one?

See, that provides a good transition. Is that what happens here? Yes. This kind of humor? Sometimes. All right, I like it. Sometimes we allow it. Sometimes it stands. Sometimes it's struck from the record. 25% sexuality. Yes. I don't listen, so I don't know what jokes are cut. Hey, that's how you keep yourself safe. Yes. But what I wanted to do today...

was because there's a lot of new films out there. We talked about some old films. My favorite time period to watch horror movies is when everybody else is not watching them. I do think it is interesting when we went to go see Long Legs. In the morning? Yes, but I'm talking the summertime versus Halloween. I like doing it the rest of the year. When we went to Long Legs, we were the only ones laughing.

Oh, yeah. Well, it was very funny. And I will say, though, for me— Why do people laugh more at horror films? I laugh as I'm excited, too. Me, too. Yes. Like, more than it's not even I find it funny. I laugh because it's, like, wild. Especially good kills. Like, there are certain kills that I got to celebrate while watching it in the theater. It's one of my favorite parts about going to the movie theater.

Not a horror film, but I did just go see Deadpool and Wolverine. I saw it too. And while I don't care, it's fun to see it in a big theater filled with people because everyone's woohooing, not like The Sims. Movies are meant for the goddamn theater. And I mean it. They're meant for the theater. You're not supposed to be watching them on your phone. If you're watching them on your phone, what are we doing here? All right? I get angry. Me and David Lynch. All right? I will fight back.

to back, Robin style. I will be the gay Robin. Reality television is meant for your phone. Yes. And YouTube videos and stuff. And us. Yes, for sure. We're meant for your phone. Not a big time film. It makes me crazy when you watch somebody watch an old film. There's so much work. I feel like that's also the binge model in general that has sort of fucked with the artist's

and audiences relationship, which is just this concept of media is meant to be consumed as fast and as large of a pile as possible. And that makes you sort of forget the, how many hundreds and thousands of hours of expertise go into making these things. And so eventually you're just like more stuff, more,

More stuff. That's why I think 80s and 90s horror movies, yes, they were great, but I think they're more romanticized because we rewatched them a hundred times. We'll also think about how at the time period, Jurassic Park was viewed as like summer schlock.

Now we know that that movie is a classic of American cinema. I don't know. It was pretty huge when it came out. It was, but it was viewed as like there were Oscar movies and there were blockbusters. It was nominated for Oscars. But you know what I'm trying to say. Like, do you know what I'm saying? I think Jurassic Park 2, but I think you can't talk bad about Jurassic Park 1 like that. I'm not, Eddie. People knew how good it was. I knew he's immediately got emotional. He's very upset. I'm so scared of him. Jurassic Park 1 is a very good movie.

It's a very good movie, but it's not an Oscar. I'm not shitting on it. At the time, it wasn't. But it wasn't branded as one. I'm just saying the concept of there used to be, those were considered to be dumb shit genre films. Like even the, yes, those were a big deal, but they were not considered the big important things

fancy ass movies that were on Oscar caliber and the dramas and the tiny little drawing rooms. You remember when the piano used to win all the Oscars? That shitty Holly Hunter movie where she's deaf or whatever. She's something. She's sad. Jurassic Park came out the same year as Schindler's List. I know. So he ran the gamut

Rough year. Yeah, but great for him. But Schindler's List was a beautiful piece of this crazy piece of telling art. Probably going to go down as Spielberg's best movie. I don't know. Jurassic Park's pretty great. Well, eh. What about that movie? Schindler's List is in his top five. I think Schindler's List, I think Jaws is better than Jurassic Park. I think Jaws is his best movie.

I think Jaws is the greatest summer horror movie that ever was. I could put it there. I'd also put Jaws somewhere in the thriller category. Thriller? It's an animal kill movie. Those are horror movies. But I view it as a, I view that more as a thriller. I think it's more of a thriller. What about like Grizzly? Do you consider that a thriller or a horror movie? Thriller. Horror based thriller. What? To me, a true horror film is something like-

He's very upset today. I know, but this is crazy talk. What about Crawl? You think Crawl's not a horror movie? It's definitely a thriller. But that's for me. It's for us. It's just our opinion. In terms of animal-based movies, I think, well, it's a monster film. Why so angry? So upset. It's like we're not angry today. If you go to Blockbuster Video. Why angry?

And you go to the, where is Jaws going to be? What section is it going to be in? I put it in the classic films category, action adventure. It's not going to be there, though. You're going to have to keep walking around and look for it because it's in the horror section. I just, I just, I just simply, I just don't understand why he's getting so. See, I view a traditional capital H horror film, something that it's certain elements.

First example. In a Violent Nature. In a Violent Nature horror film. Just finished it. Fucking awesome. It's great. There's a sequel coming. But I do think that what they're, yeah, we saw that announcement at SDCC, but I think that what's interesting is it's this new thing that we're seeing in horror recently, which is the Artified version of

of what you could call hacky genres within horror. And this could have been just a run-of-the-mill slasher film. Because slasher films... Well, is this a horror movie or an anti-fireman movie? This is a horror film. Sometimes they are one and the same. I believe a horror film has a fantastical edge to it.

to it that is not in reality based. Like there's something about it that bumps it up to past drama, past thriller. I think a serial killer film largely would be considered a thriller. Long Legs,

teeters on the thriller horror because of the supernatural element zodiac you think is like a thriller thriller but also i dare say i feel that a horror is more based on the idea of like it's about the kills rather than about the story okay that's i really think about that in that way because like hereditary is at its core i think hereditary will be labeled

One of the biggest, probably the best horror films of the 2000s. It's probably the best one I've seen in the last 10 years. It edges up my top 10 films of all time, all the time. I watch Hereditary for fun. I love that movie. But there is something about that movie, at the very base of it, is...

It's a horror because of the supernatural elements, but what elevates it is the fact that it's also a platinum tier drama. So you have the both. Like you have this, it's like what the exorcist nails. Well, that's a type of horror movie. Yes. Is drama. Or the art, because then this is probably edging into the art horror. Where like, in a violent nature, takes the slasher tropes

and plays it out in a very slow build. But what I loved about it in A Violent Nature is that much like Behind the Mask, which is a great mockumentary slash horror movie that needs to come out, which is about basically, Behind the Mask is awesome. It's a mockumentary about a Jason Voorhees type killer and his like, it's like talking with this killer. How he prepares as he talks. Does he talk?

Yes. He's funny. He's like funny in it. It's closer to Man by Star. No, no, no. He's like a funny, he's like a normal guy that does this thing. But this story, like in a violent nature, I love that it's from the killer's perspective because you never see it from the killer's perspective. I think he's in almost every shot of the film. Yes. And it's a, I love that it's a stunt

man's movie. Yes. It's the Kane Hodder, right? Like Kane Hodder. What's like when they developed Jason Voorhees, when they developed Mike Myers, they wanted it to have a dread without a lot of lines because they just had stuntmen doing it, but they learned how to do it with their bodies. It's like this, like it's a character creature acting thing that is such a niche world of fantastic performers. You never see like, what's his name from Pan's Labyrinth? Super skinny.

I don't know. Oh, yes. The guy with the eyeball hands? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's eyeball hands. He's also the fish man. Oh, he's great. Who's that guy? Skinny guy. I don't know his name. I never learned it. Can I be honest? I don't know. You know he's packing. Of course. He's super skinny. All those tall skinny guys are packing. Doug Jones. Also from Hocus Pocus. Oh, yeah. Doug Jones does look...

like a long-dicked dude. Yeah. Oh, yeah, you know his back. Long and thin. But you'd have to get rid of the, like, you'd have to get through the kissing of the corpse face, which I do feel that most of his fans would be definitely into. Oh, no, yeah, yeah. I don't think he has a problem getting laid. No, no, no. There are many, many haunted girls that have sex with that man. Yeah, dude. Women. Also, I mean, as a fish, he was fucking. He was, but I still think...

Not as a gills. I'm a monster fucker. Did you guys not like Shape of Water? No, no, I just don't want to bang Shape of Water. I just don't want to bang the fish man. I actually, I'm going to be honest. I fell asleep. You fell asleep? You got to wake up. Well, you watch it again. Michael Shannon's incredible. I know. He is a great villain in that movie, but I did unfortunately fall asleep. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Oh, that's the sound a ghost makes when it's sitting down.

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I'm looking at now Chris Nash, who made In a Violent Nature. This is a new young, this guy, he was an actor turned director. But how do we feel about this? Have you guys seen Ghost Story with Mara Remy? I refuse to watch it. Insanely enough, we were just talking about not that long ago watching it. I've never seen it.

So my issue... Where's the sheet? I was worried it was too sad and I wanted it to be scary and I didn't want it to be sad. When I went to go see you with Natalie, Natalie and I are...

I'm both generous and deeply fucking... Rooney Mara. I'm deeply... I make my decisions sharpen like a knife. I cut him off. Right? If I don't like something, I shut it off. Or I walk out. Right? If I don't like something. A lot of times I don't give it a shot. Yeah, you don't let it breathe. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I go, no! Right? And we went to go see a ghost story in the theater. And we both hated it so much...

We left. So quickly, we left. It was like, I remember the moment we left. You walked out before it was over? Yes. This is a spoiler. Not for the end, of course. No. The spoiler is the reason why we left was the 10-minute long she eats the pie scene. And we were like, this- Was it sexy? No. We all have to sit and watch this shit and act sexy.

like, oh, whoa, what a shame. It's just like, she had to do this shameful thing. It's because Rudy Morrow hasn't had more than a quinoa salad in her stomach for fucking 10, 15 years. She's hungry. Why are you taking this away from her? We all have to watch her eat this pie. We're like, oh, she's grieving. She's being like, I do that on a fucking Thursday. You eat a whole pie on Thursdays? I can.

I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you. I guess that's what it was. It's about the grief of watching from a ghost perspective, watching someone grieve. You don't like sad movies, though. I love sad movies. I'm getting more into sad movies. But my thing is, you got a ghost there, dude. Play some tricks. If there's a ghost in a film with the sheet on. You want him to Beetlejuice it up? He does. Sort of. Ha ha ha.

I love that movie. But like in a romantic way. Yes, people love the movie. I love it. A lot of people do like it. People love that movie. But I think it's because, and I'm not saying this wrong. I'm not saying this to challenge you, Rob. Henry's scared to be sad. I am scared to be sad, but I think that sometimes people are fooled by an artistic interpretation of a story. I think something like Skin and Meringue.

I mean, I'd rather puke on my own shit than watch Skin of Meringue. I love it. We have friends that made it, and I'm sorry. I love that you made it. I don't know them personally. And here's the thing. And I like Skrunk. I liked it. I like Skin of Meringue. Fucking come at me, bros. Skin of Meringue. I know why you hate it, but I liked it. Skin of Meringue was the movie equivalent. My dreams last night were more entertaining. It was the movie equivalent of putting four dice in a paper bag and just rolling it around. They were trying something, and I think that that was the movie equivalent. I didn't even think they were trying anything.

There was nothing to try. I think both of you just gave up. I think you decided you didn't watch the movie. I've watched it three times. Then why did you watch it three times? Because I needed to prove to myself it was bad. I liked it. Because everybody was like, it's brilliant, you don't get it. It's out of focus. I tried to watch it three times. And guess what I also did it the third time. I did it the way I was quote unquote supposed to do it. I did this exactly. With the subtitles on?

In a hotel room with the, this is what they told us to do for Skinnamarink. Put it on a laptop, put a cover over you and the laptop, and watch it in total darkness like a child. Who told you to do that? I read about this on the fucking internet. Is that the only way a movie is good? It's not a good movie. Eddie, exactly, you don't need to yell at me. Yes. I'm just mad. People talk about Skinnamarink, I yell.

You get so mad. It's really trash. Getting skronked, getting skronked. Also, they did the dedicated two before the movie even started. It's because they had to get it out of the new people would leave. Yes. But then did you guys see Immaculate? Did you see Immaculate? No.

No, I didn't. I want to see it. Okay, so this is another... Boobie, boobie. So, okay, so big verdict. Summer number one, In a Violent Nature is the good version of a ghost story, according to here, last podcast on the left. The good version of a ghost story? That's what we're saying. It's Friday the 13th! It's good art horror. Good art horror. There's no slasher in...

Ghost Story. But it's a horror film because there's a ghost in it. Ghost Story is an horror movie. It's a ghost story. It's a love story. But it's a ghost story. I like that Henry's pointing at me as if I'm on board with this, but I've not seen Ghost Story. How do you feel about What Lies Beneath? Is that a horror movie or is it a thriller? Thriller. Definitely a thriller. There's a ghost in it.

So go fuck yourself. I would say it's a thriller cuss horror or ghost story. It is definitely a ghost. I think that ghost stories can be in the middle in between of thrillers and horrors. Is Ghostbusters a horror movie? It's a comedy. Yeah, that's right. It's a horror comedy. It's a comedy with horror elements. I guess so. But the reason why the original Ghostbusters works so well is because it's told straight.

The whole point is that they are better than them gay ghostbusters. Cause I watched that at night. I honestly, I wish they were sucking and fucking God, I'd love it. But at least they do the work because Dan Aykroyd knows all of the actual paranormal concepts and wrote it from the perspective of, it's more of a play on blue collar workers. Like if you rewatch ghostbusters and understand it's making fun of this concept of blue collar workers in an,

intellectual space trying to nail this and then handling something that's way beyond them. Which I love. I love that movie. That's why I like that movie. So for summer 2024 films. It's like a Jason or Michael Myers. But it's an arty version of it. It's a new retelling. I guess so. The dialogue was still stupid. Yes. But that was the point of it. It's a play up of it. There's plenty of people smoking weed. There's no boobies though. No. Which also again it was like what a waste.

But the kills were delightful. That's the thing. So in a violent nature, great kills. Where's the tits? I think that we've grown past tits in horror movies. I haven't. That's not true. That's not true. There are boobies other places. Again, Immaculate. I'm bringing up Immaculate again. Oh, Immaculate had boobies? Well,

Well, it's got city, sweetie. All I see is her boobies. She's chesty, but she doesn't show them. No, she doesn't show them, but honestly, real sexy because she's still like a wet nun in a lot of scenes. That's awesome. That's when Bobbo, Bobbo, you see them like the big old nasties wet underneath her nuns. I am not saying anything about this movie other than the fact that it's the only film we'll talk about today in which the ending moments...

Make up for the rest of the film. Made the entire movie. It makes the entire movie. See, that's my problem with horror movies in general, including Long Legs, is the endings are usually horrible. I went to go see it again after watching the first time because the entire time I was like, oh, I thought this was going to be good and I don't really like it as much. She's one of those. Because she's real easy to look at. Right. She's very... But she's got nothing. Nothing.

Going on. No. Really? I don't know much about her. I just know that she's incredibly popular and has big boobs. All I know is that... I mean, that's what you need to know. In terms of, like, the idea of sexuality-driving performances, I went to go see... What was that Kristen Stewart? I saw that movie. The Love Lie is Bleeding. Yeah.

Was that good? Yeah, yes. It looks awesome. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. So that's the thing, right? I watched that movie and I was like, this movie is liquid evil sex. I love everything about this movie. But it's a crime thriller. Yes. Yeah, but it made me start working out. Like, watching that movie got me so turned on that I was like, should we all be working out? But there was something about it where it was like, see, this is sexy. It's sexy.

So why is this sexy? But then you have big boobied, wet ass nun, Sydney Sweeney, talking like a parrot to a bunch of people. And I was like, this is actually, this is not sensual. I do not find this sensual. She's supposed to be playing this. She's a nun. Yeah, she's a nun. No, I thought it was sexual. I always think it's funny too when they have ladies like that play nuns. I know. It's like, oh, she shouldn't. They even say it right up top. He goes, you're too pretty to be a nun.

Because they have to. Yeah, because she's way too hot to be a nun. Someone's going to try and fuck you. And she's talking to some other homely, quote unquote, the homely nun that's another supermodel. Just so hot. Like all these women have shaved legs, shaved armpits, shaved, you know, like definitely not walking around with a Tom Selleck mustache. Definitely not covered in muck.

from pulling water out of a bullshit ravine. You know what I mean? Like that's all nuns are. They're big, musty, gross, like mop women. And meanwhile, it's like, it's all just played by models. That's what always takes me out. And that's kind of what I like. That's what I admire about Russell Crowe and his last two exorcist films. Are they related to each other or are they separate? They are not only not related, but,

The Pope's exorcist and the exorcist can both be... Exorcism. The exorcism can both be entirely skipped.

One is him playing- Also, the last Exorcist movie could be entirely skipped. Entirely skipped. These guys are like, but these two guys are fucking so funny. Russell Crowe playing the Pope's Exorcist, super cool, ultimate Exorcist of all Exorcists. Then he's in the Exorcism. He's playing a dumpy actor playing an Exorcist in a film. Oh, okay. And it's just so funny to watch him-

try to play dumpy actor Russell Crowe. Because he's just playing himself. It's just Russell Crowe. And you see these scenes with him trying to rehearse his lines. Yeah. Where being like,

Out, damn you. Out, demon. You will listen to me. Meanwhile, he's doing the same exact lines, but for serious, in the Pope's Exorcist, and he's bad at both. I even went to go see Madame Webb in the movie theater, and I still chose to not see either the Pope's Exorcist or the Exorcist. Is the Exorcist out? Oh, yeah. It's on VOD. Oh, yeah.

pleaded more of Madam Web than I did both the Pope's exorcist and the exorcism. Unfortunately, though, we are sort of like, we are biased in our home because Natalie is not a Russell Crowe fan. So I am a Russell Crowe fan. Oh, man, did you see Unhinged? No, it's supposed to be good. It's really good. He does the Nick Cage thing where he'll do like one good movie. Yeah, he's

He ain't getting any smaller. No. And then on the next, he's like, they had him put on weight. Or they didn't make him lose any. He came forward in an interview. Did you not hear this? He came forward in an interview being like, I'm done taking care of myself. Yeah. He's literally just done with it. That's great. I was like, all right, as long as you're on it. He did it. I'm not getting fit for these shits anymore. I'm playing bad characters or characters that you're just going to have to not act like.

Act like I'm too large for this. He was like, what's this? Because he did, my favorite was the Scorcher. Oh, when he did the Sorcerer's Apprentice. No, that was Nick Cage. That was Nick Cage. How was that? I never watched that. It's very funny. Yeah. Because it's Nick Cage. I know Disney is like trying to pretend like it doesn't exist. Nick Cage, just a little too out of shape to be playing a man who kills evil sorcerers for a living. Mm-hmm.

And it's very funny because it's him in a wig and tight. He makes armor look tight. The both of them do the same thing in these films. And that's why I like, but I like it. It's like he's decided he's doing this thing, but it is limiting his range as an actor, I think, in a way. I don't think he cares anymore. No, no, no, no. But he was upset when they asked him about Gladiator 2. And he's just like, I'm never going to talk about this movie because obviously, look at him. He wasn't asked to be a part of Gladiator 2. He's dead! That!

That's the thing! But I guess they expected him, I'm going to assume he wanted to do flashbacks, but again, that is not, he could never go back to being Maximus. You're never going to be Maximus ever again, bro. You died when you were at your hottest. Yes, you are not going to be looking like a younger version of Maximus. Sorry, bro. Also, Gladiator 2, everyone's dead. Everybody's dead, yeah. What's the point of that fucking movie?

Years later. Isn't the guy playing Zap?

What do you mean? From the American gladiators? See, that'd be fun. See, that would be fun. If it turns out Zap was the great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandson of Maximus. Put him on a rhinosaurus. All right, so we're saying long legs, watch it. Yes, long legs was really fun. Violent nature, watch it. Watch it. Really fun. I watched Abigail last night. Have you guys seen that? I liked Abigail. I really liked Abigail. I view that as a horror action film.

film. Yes. Yes. Yeah. It was definitely they stole a lot from like from Just Till Dawn and like Bordello of Blood and Demon Knight. It's very similar to those movies. They even make jokes in it that like they are taking from other vampire franchises. Can I ask though? I thought it was trash. What?

Abigail. It was a popcorn film. It's fun. It's a throwaway film. I thought it was going to be cooler than it was. The trailer was great. Can I ask? What did you like about it? Hey, listen. That was stupid. Yeah, it's supposed to be stupid. I'm asking a question to both of you. Okay, great. I made Jackie upset. Now, how do we feel about this constant need to be meta?

Like this idea that each one of these films we've even brought up has had a knowing wink to the genre that they're in. And it's like at some point, when will the knowing winks be run out? Like Deadpool kind of ruined it. Well, Deadpool and Wolverine, but wasn't that sort of, I haven't seen it yet, but isn't that like, we're saying nothing about it. Apparently that's in the comments too, in the comics. Right. Isn't that the point? Deadpool is meta, but isn't the point of Deadpool and Wolverine, like he's making fun of

every single part of the Marvel lexicon, right? Yes. Which is awesome, but where do we go from here? Like, can every single movie constantly just be a commentary on the quote-unquote genre of the movie that it's in? But I think that's why there are other movies that are trying to flip the script and

That's why I only like movies that are trying something new and different. Which is so hard to do because movies have been happening for 150 years. Exactly, which is why you think of Skrunk, you think of Skink and Marink, and why so many people hate it, and I understand why you do. Skink and Marink. But it was trying something, and there's going to be a lot of flops in the trying something. They literally could have just put the camera in a room and walked away, and that would have been the whole movie. Well, the thing is that it's about how you...

pitch it, right? So I view like... I'm going to shoot the corner of the room and then nothing's going to happen and then a phone's going to ring. You ever seen Cassavetes? Any Cassavetes films? Those are... But there's a plot. There's faces. There's dialogue. At the time period, too, it was a play upon genre and it was a play upon movie making on the whole and trying to create this sort of like hole in the wall, fly in the wall sort of characteristic, especially like in The Killing of a Chinese Bookie. Yeah. And a couple of things where you're supposed to sort of like...

That's the artful way of doing it. Like there's an artful way and an intentional way of doing certain things that if you're constantly searching for novelty, you're eventually going to lose the aspect. I feel like on some level, if you're constantly being like, what's new, what's new, what's new. But there's always new stories to be told. I just went to go see Oddity and I knew nothing.

Nothing about Oddity. I went in completely blind, didn't even see a trailer for it, and I loved it. It was definitely, but here's the thing. It had the sprinklings of stories that, of course, horror movies that we are all familiar with, but it was doing it in its own way. And I liked what it did. Which one is this film? Oddity is the person that made Caveat. I forget what it is.

Oh, I liked Cavia. In a psychic medium attempts to uncover the truth behind her sister's murder at the site of the crime. Damian McCarthy. So it is... It's just a creep. It's got a lot of creepy imagery, a part of it. And again, not like...

retelling the game but it was something that at least I saw that hit me and had good jump scares and creeped me out in ways that I wasn't expecting his other movie is caveat did you see that yeah it's pretty good yeah

But all I knew is that he's an indie horror dude. Well, that's where independent film is fucking crushing it. Yes, Oddity was great. It creeped me the hell out. I think now is the time. I think people don't know 100%, but we are, I think, I'm calling it, is we are entering another golden age of independent horror. Oh, yes. In the 70s, it happened in the 90s. And it's just like, it's because of everything that happened with the strike.

and studios aren't making shit anymore. And so these independent films are going to start coming in and that always leans on horror. Right now, we are seeing a massive...

like change in the direction of a lot of these production companies. And I think that we're going to see, it's going to be, it's going to get worse before it gets better. But I think that we did just come, we already kind of came through a big golden age in the 2010s of independent horror. That's where hereditary came from. It follows like that, that, that first wave of that, like new, new, new,

like art house horror. And I think that we're watching it play out because we're watching it now start to get the attention of the main line of Hollywood, which, um, to be honest right now, we shouldn't trust them because they've been fucking it all up.

And I don't know whether or not they are going to. I don't know if we're going to. I think that we're seeing in the 2030s. I saw the TV. It's going to be like the 1970s again. You know what I mean? Right now we're watching. We're in the middle of a really shitty correction period.

while we're going to see a bunch more massive failures while slowly but surely, because we're not fully back as an independent cinema world until we've got popular independent dramas, independent comedies, and independent other films outside of just horror. Horror is a great way to make money, but right now, it has to be across the board. We've got to take a $250 million movie and we've got to figure out how do we break that back up into $20 million.

fucking $25 million movies. That's what it should be. Well, also, a lot of these movies, everyone complains about running time, and then every movie we go see that's $300 million is two and a half hours minimum. Because they feel forced to make them that long because of how much money it takes to make them. The thing with Indiana Jones, the most recent Indiana Jones, Indiana Jones 5.

I thought it was fine. It's fine. But if you would have just, it was three hours long, pretty much. If you would have taken an hour out of that movie. Much better film. Everybody would have loved it more. You would have saved $100 million, theoretically, if it's $300 million to make. Yep. So what are they fucking doing? It's because it's egos, buddy.

It doesn't need to be that long. That's just how this is. Bo's Afraid needed to be that long. I loved Bo's Afraid. I could have watched it a few more hours of it. It was so good. I love Bo's Afraid. Did you see a Quiet Place day one? I did. Yeah. It was fine. It was fine? No, it wasn't fine. Well, it's just, hey, let's get to it. It was pretty bad, yeah. Yeah, it was fine. It was a fine or a cool, because it was that one I didn't see. I did ads for it, so I had to say it was fine. Oh, gosh. Yes, please, yes. We do have to say it was fine. Oh, I'm sorry. It was great. Live from Northland.

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I saw the TV glow is the one, the other indie one that I wanted to bring up. Manny, our friend, worked on all the visual aspects. Really enjoyed it. It was a very interesting film. I saw the TV glow from the creator of We're All Going to the World's Fair, which another one. Which is also very good. It was also one of those ones that I expected it to be

Like, I don't know if I necessarily loved We're All Going to the World's Fair, but I liked that it was like, all right, well, it's certainly something different that I hadn't seen. It was very, very something different. And same with I Saw the TV Glow, where it's surreal. It's a new thing. It's cerebral. It's like a different kind of...

of horror. Yes, I liked it. It's very atmospheric. It is very, very interesting. It's a lot of, you know, we're getting practical effects back in a big way. Yeah. Other two movies I think to look out for this year was, again, was Stop Motion. Yes! Because of that. That looks very cool. Yes! It's fucked up! It's so fucked up! And the other... Yeah, Stop Motion animation. And the other one, Jackie, that I sent to you and I forgot to mention up top, but

you must watch. We'll get there. We'll get to Beetlejuice. I haven't seen it. I'm waiting on Beetlejuice Beetlejuice to see it. Yes. Oh, I'm going to see it. Unfortunately, as an elder millennial, it has my money already. Yeah. And so I'm going to go see it even though I'm so afraid. Like, I'm literally going to like, I'm going to eat three beta blockers.

before going to see it. I'm just going to try to feel nothing. I'm just going to try to feel nothing while watching it so that I don't feel the negative energies that I might feel. So that's what I'm going to try. I'm going to try to protect myself against my own... Just watching it, I'm going to protect myself. Because it doesn't...

It's not looking great. You've got to give yourself over. You've got to open up your heart, Henry. I'm going to say it looks fine. But the movie to see is The Devil's Bath. You're bringing up Devil's Bath, baby. The Devil's Bath, I think, is the sneaker. I don't know this one. It's atmospheric. It's fucked. It's folk horror. I think it depends on... I feel like...

If you love Hagazusa, you're going to love The Devil's Bath. Such a funny idea. I understand. For the lovers of Hagazusa. Because I love Hagazusa. Both of us love Hagazusa. Well, it's a foreign film. Yes. Okay. That's always a good sign. Set in 1750. You know it's a good year, babes. But it goes real. Honestly, I love it. It goes. It's beautifully made. Give the bitch of what it's about. When you play.

pitched it to me, I was just like, oh, I am there explaining to me about like just the idea of back in the day that they would like, obviously everybody's life was horrible, but you couldn't kill yourself because then you'd be damned to hell. So they would have this roundabout way of getting, of killing themselves by committing an atrocious act and

And then going to the sheriff and saying, I did this, put me to death. And they kill you on the spot. But they will absolve you of your guilt before they put you to execution. So you will still go to heaven. So it's like a roundabout way of killing yourself. That's why the Protestants never trust the Catholics. Because they can just go to confession and then get on out.

But this story is really interesting because it's both a horror film because there is horror in it and there's horror somewhat vaguely supernatural elements, but it's also an old-timey true crime story because it's about this concept of this type of suicide. It seems like more of a drama than a horror. But it plays into this idea of what's wrong with this woman and it's mostly just, man, you know what's scary? What?

What happens inside the uterus? Being a woman is scary. Especially 1750. Not a lot of ladies were having a good time. It's definitely in the realm of the witch. And midsummer. I'm in for that. But The Devil's Path is great. It's slow paced. You're going to love it, Eddie. It is exactly what you like. You know what I liked about Midsommar and Most Violent Nature? All the daytime killings.

Love the daytime killers. Yes. Love the daytime killers. Yes. I feel like I'm trying to think, is there any other ones? Maxine, we all saw it together. We loved it. I liked it a lot. We loved it. As time goes on, I like it more and more. Yes. It was super silly for sure, but in the ending, was it like, you jumped the shark? Well, it went more.

It went thriller. Yeah, but I enjoyed the fucking hell out of it. I found Maxine to be really, really interesting because Ty West is... I love him as a director. I think that Pearl was truly one of his biggest artistic successes of all time. That was my least favorite of the three. Well, I can understand, but as a person who's in Jackie's realm of the anything but bore me, I was like...

That's something new. It's something new. I've never seen this story before like this, and it was interesting. Maxine shows...

Ty West puts on his Brian De Palma hat and tries to make a Brian De Palma film, but it kind of shows just how good Brian De Palma was. Maxine actually just made me want to go back and watch a bunch more Brian De Palma, which I do, and I loved Maxine for that. But you guys, if you haven't checked out, like, there's a couple, there was one that was, The Fury. The Fury is a very, very interesting film.

That he did. The Fury is a psychic movie. It's a psychic thriller that Brian De Palma did from back in the day. Oh, cool. This is with Kirk Douglas. Ooh. And he does the, hey, you tell me you get your hands away from my daughter. Like, I love Kirk Douglas. He also did Raising Cain. I love Raising Cain. Raising Cain is a movie. Brian De Palma's great. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Casualties of War, you know, I mean, Scarface. And have you ever seen Sisters? No.

Sisters, no. Sisters is weird. Yeah. I've seen Sisters Brothers, which I really like. It's a Western. Yeah, we're right here, Eddie. And also Dressed to Kill, one of the most interesting thrillers of all time. Yes. What do you guys think about Alien Romulus? Are you excited or not? Yes. Very excited. The reason why I'm- Sci-fi or horror?

Sci-fi horror. Sci-fi horror. Sci-fi horror. But also, this one is supposed to be, at least what they're saying, is that they were shooting for as close to the original. That's what it looks like. The feel of the original. It's going horror. They're shooting for horror. The first one is definitely horror, and it goes more sci-fi as the, to me, alien. Just watching that alien thing fuck that guy's throat every time it defeated him. Every time. Squirming. I can't.

And not stick in its weird dick thing. Again, like, while I do wish there'd be less franchise reboots, but, hey, with Alien, I'll rewatch them. There's nothing cooler. No, I love it. And I'll watch the whole thing. I've watched every one of the AVPs. I love them. I didn't see the second AVP. It's all right. You know, it's fun. Those are my, like, I give a lot of allowances to those movies because I just go for fun. I get that. I'm just mad there was humans in it.

Yeah, but you and I have always talked about this, about how the idea of an AVP with no humans. No dialogue. That is exactly what we need. Yeah, well, I also, you don't want the reboot kind of thing, but I will say the first Omen actually surprised me this year. You liked it? I liked it more. I'll throw it out, like the Omen franchise, not my favorite franchise. Yeah, the first one's cool. I like the very, very first one is a classic.

piece of horror cinema. Yes, but the first Omen, I definitely went into it thinking like, oh, it's just going to be just shit. And the fact that I actually enjoyed it was... I forgot it in the first Omen. It was better than I thought it was going to be. The first Omen is not bad. Do I have to re-watch the original Omen? No. Because it's been like 25 years. No, they flashback. There's like one scene of Gregory Peck in a weird thing where they go like, hey!

That's it. That's it. He goes up to it. It doesn't necessarily make sense because of the plot of the original. No, it doesn't. Don't think about it too hard. Don't think about it. Did you all do Watchers? Yes. I have. Well, I want to say, the reason why I'm like, let's be gentle on Watchers because I feel bad when it's a young... There's more, right? It's a new young director. I know it's M. Night Shyamalan's daughter. It is M. Night Shyamalan's daughter. So it's a nepo baby situation. From the worst dude. See, I...

I mean, I've already got my tickets for Trap, so. Me too. I'm an M. Night Shyamalan. Apologist. I'm an apologist. I think that. I know it's bad. I know it's bad. And when he's, he's just the one of the single most hit or miss creators for me of all time. Because I love The Visit. I love Old. Trash. I love. The Visit was old. Old.

Old? I mean, I refuse to watch. I love it. The Visit was like one of the last times I was like, he's not going to get me again. Because that movie was so bad, I was like rooting for the old people. Well, so was I. I was like, children would die. That's why we liked it. I'm always rooting for the old people. That's why we liked it. I always root for the bad guy. It's my favorite. Fuck the bleeds. Fuck them. Yeah.

Oh, come on. Yeah, man. But the Watchers really, like, I thought, though, that maybe, I was like, I was hoping that, all right, M. Night Shyamalan's daughter, maybe she'll go completely in a different aspect. Like, she's going to try something completely new. I think he made most of that movie, right?

He definitely made it. It seems like it's... Is the dialogue awful? Because then he made it. M.I. Chabon is not great with the dialogue. He's awful at it. The main issue is that they are writing it. It's all done by his production company. Wait, what was the name of the DJ in Old? Old! Oh, it's like Honda Civic or something. What was his name? I forget what it was. DJ... What was his name?

Mid-sized sedan. Mid-sized sedan. That was his name. His name was mid-sized sedan. I loved old men. And it's old. Old. We would yell old at the screen every time. Jackie and I were like, I can't see it. We were all lit up. I'm literally going, they're getting old. Man, glass was so bad. I was so mad. Glass. Oh, God. Glass. But I love Split. Split was fucking great.

I loved Split. I loved it. The Cloverfield Lane was the better version of Split. Loved Cloverfield Lane. Loved Cloverfield Lane. Yeah, that movie was great. Split was shit. Sixth Sense probably sucks if you go back and watch it. It does. No, actually, it's not as bad as you would expect.

it to be because I went back and rewatched it a couple of years ago. I am excited to go see Trap, though. I'm looking forward. Oh, yeah, buddy. Because I watched the trailer for it. I get drunk and ready for every one. I don't care. There's something about his movies. Like, I don't mind it if I... How do I put this? I know you're almost wasting my time. Oh, yeah. Like, I know that this is... M. Night Shyamalan, you know what it is to honestly...

It's what I know about the man. The man makes movies because he is obsessed with making movies. And he puts up his own money for all of his films so that nobody can tell him what to do with any of his movies. Yes. Oh, it's Josh Hartnett. Oh, yeah. I didn't even recognize him. Oh, yeah, he's back now. He's like a man now. Oh, it's a Hartnett-issance. Ever since Op.

Oppenheimer. He's a much better actor now, too. He is. He's a much better actor now. But there's something about these movies when I go... It's like sudden death, kind of. Yeah. It's like, I know that it's not great, but it's like, just don't lie to me about it. I like watching M. Night Shyamalan put his heart and soul in these movies. Do I believe he might need somebody to probably go help him edit? Edit. He needs an editor. And a writer. But hey, man. A dialogue. Someone who does dialogue. That man's living the

fucking dream. And that's what I like about what that is. Well, it's a highly stressful life that he leads. I appreciate the fact that he doesn't have to fuck him. There's no notes he's got to take. There's no final editing. Yeah, but how do you feel now that he's so... His daughter did Watchers and then his other daughter is the...

The pop star lead in Trap. So, Eddie, I don't know if you're familiar with what it's about, but it's like Josh Hartnett takes his daughter essentially to a Taylor Swift concert. There's a killer at the concert in the trailer. He's the killer. But the pop star is M. Night Shyamalan's daughter, and she wrote an entire album of music to debut in this movie. Well, that's kind of cool. I've...

It kind of makes me like him and I chop a lot even more. I think it's cute. But you hate nepo babies. I don't hate nepo babies. Oh, okay. I thought you did. Henry hates nepo babies. I think it's great. I think that nepo babies are just... You're obsessed with Brawny, James. Brawny I'm obsessed with because of their...

The way they are changing the entire rules of basketball to put him on a team to play probably half a season with his father. And I'm going to try to go get a ticket to go see, which is going to be like fucking 15,000. Yeah. Yeah.

He got, yeah, they got me. I'm obsessed with this storyline, but it's also more so, like, Nepo Babies in the entertainment industry. I like Nepo Babies, personally. I feel like they're well-trained. They have to. Sometimes. Yes. It depends on the Nepo Baby. It depends on what they're doing. It depends on what they're doing. It depends on how hard they're working. See, like, Bronny James is obviously not ready to be on the Lakers. No.

And in basketball, it's easy to tell if you're not ready. That's true. Because you're not scoring points. I'm ready. Put me in. I dribble it. She dribbled. She dribbled him in here. That's why she brought her fucking... Seriously, he's very small. But that's why I'm fascinated because it's like essentially like...

It's somebody Marcus's size playing basketball that he's just sort of a laugh. Going back to Trap, I love the suspense movies that take place in arenas. Yes. Oh, yeah. And you can't get out of the arena. Yes. There was a movie that came out. It was an underground, not underground, but just a straight-to-video action film called Final Score.

That is that. It came out like six or seven years ago starring Dave Bautista, who's like my favorite. I love Dave Bautista. I love Dave Bautista. And he has to like, it's a soccer match and he has to find the people who are trying to kill everyone at the soccer match. And it's a lot of fun. That's awesome. 69% nice. Yeah, I'll watch that. I think we've done it. Oh, before we go. Oh, yes. How good does Nosferatu look? Oh my God.

It looks like my favorite movie. Like, before it even comes out. God. Has he fucked up yet? One time yet? Not in my opinion. What else has he done? I'm actually even done. The Northman was great. My bachelor party. Remember? I love Northman. I actually felt like the Northman got a bunch of hate for some reason. I thought it was fucking awesome. I love the Northman.

Yeah, Northam was great. How do you feel about... I was talking with someone else about Lily Rose Depp in Nosferatu. She's perfect as a skinny. I think that she is... Because she's Mina. I don't know if it is Mina. She looks great as Mina, yeah. I feel like she's got the face of...

to be from a different time. In a traditional vampire story, if it looks like they're doing it this way, you want someone that looks sort of like a fainting... It's not meaner. You know what I mean? You need something that's... Nosferatu is the original story that Dracula stole.

So essentially, Nosferatu came out before. It's this whole thing. Nosferatu was based off of the O.G. Now, I also love that Willem Dafoe is in it because he played Nosferatu in, what was it? Oh, which is another great movie. Shadow of a Vampire. Shadow of a Vampire, yes! Yeah, yeah, yeah, which was great. But yeah, know who else is in Nosferatu who has been one of my favorite guys lately is Aaron Taylor Johnson, the kid from Kick-Ass. Oh, yes!

He's been doing really good. He is. He's a great actor. Yeah, he's been doing really good. I really enjoy him. And if I can throw a shout out to a non-horror movie to make sure everyone watches it as it comes out, I've told both of you to go see it. Kill is probably the best action movie of the last decade. Can't wait. Can't wait to see it. It's fucking unbelievable. I can't wait to see it. So we already got, honestly, while we did talk a lot of mess. It's Indian, not Korean. I'm really excited to see this. Well, we did talk a lot of mess, I will say.

I think that in the end we're going to show you all, right? Spend your money in the movie theater. Please go to the movie theater. Go to the movie theater. Get a Stubbs account. It doesn't cost that much. It's $23.99 a month. You can see up to three movies a week. We don't. I know we have nothing to do with Stubbs. No, I wish. We have nothing to do with AMC. They're not giving us any money. I have stock in AMC and it's doing horrible. He's doing terrible because it's such a good deal.

Because it's literally such a good deal. And don't tell them it's such a good deal because I'm so worried they're going to take Stubbs away. I don't know what I will tell them. I see every movie for free. There's so many people who just have it and don't go. That's where they make their money. Yes. And we all go and buy like a $30 beer. And so they're fine. Oh, yeah. They don't care. This is what is in the door. I'm just saying that people work on these movies. Yes.

And they try really hard. And without you going to see them in the theaters until we figure out a way to properly show how you count the way people watch these things, because that's what they're all seeing. That's what all these production companies do. And they're all fighting over how they decide they want to

count how many people watch these things on the internet. Netflix got its own numbers. Amazon has its own numbers. Apple has its own numbers. And they just make it up. They don't tell you. So the way we can directly help these people that are making movies is by spending the money in the theater to go see it. And so if you want, if you like movies, and I know that there's a lot of people, like obviously this is not for people that

don't like, you know, big groups or whatever fucking bullshit. I get it. But it's like, if you like them, go out and see these movies. Put money in the hands of people that make the stuff that like what you like. I went and saw Sound of Freedom three times last year. He loved it. Hell yeah. They're even showing the Olympics at the movie theater right now. Which I think is really cool. It's so smart. I would love to see huge Olympics.

I absolutely. So go see In a Violent Nature. Go see Long Legs. Go see. Violent Nature I had to buy on Apple. I did the same. I went and bought it because now it's not in theaters anymore. But Devil's Bath you can definitely stream. See the Devil's Bath. Get Shudder. Give them your money. Nose for Ratu. Bring your parents to go see Nose for Ratu this Christmas and scare the shit out of your mother. Yes. And also horror movies. Shudder.

What is it? $5.99, $6.99 a month? I don't do it. I should hook up. Oh, and then our buddy David does not shoot in Late Night with the Devil. Oh, God, Late Night with the Devil. Go watch Late Night with the Devil. Dude, yes. Another one that was like... I had never seen that movie before, but it was like the inklings of other stories kind of put into one. So it wasn't like...

Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? But I loved Late Night with the Devil. I got to see it. And we just, if you go to our Patreon, you can hear an interview with us and the directors of Mind, Body, Spirit. Which is also a really great small found footage movie that I absolutely love. Mind, Body, Spirit? Yeah, it's great. Evil Yoga. Evil Yoga. Ooh, okay. That makes me think of In a Violent Nature, but we don't need to bring that up. Oh, yeah, that's right. It's good. You've got great talent. All right, so go out there.

You know, go live life. Go live every day knowing that there's another horror movie for you to see. And love the fact that you can see it with your family or tell your family to go fuck themselves. Go watch it alone in the garage. Or in your car. You can bring a laptop out there and you can watch it in your car. Just make sure the garage door is open. And if your pants are baggy enough, you can sneak in a Jersey Mike's. That's the key. Or, like our buddies did...

Our friend Adam Neumann, they all went to go see the stupid Garfield movie and they all brought in lasagna. Yes. You'd be surprised what you could bring into a movie theater. Make it your home. They don't stop you. All right. Honestly, it makes me laugh your way to the back. Do you see the guy that was watching Love Lies Bleeding that people took pictures of him because he had open pornography, a bottle of fireball, some joints, and he's passed out with his dick in his hand watching Love Lies Bleeding.

I mean, you've got to watch pornography when these beautiful women are up on the screen. They're acting. What is wrong with you? I wouldn't need the porn. That's for damn sure. Well, everyone's different. Thank you, guys. Join the Patreon.com slash podcast on the left. You can watch us talk and perform. Go on Twitch.tv slash LPN TV and you can go and see that that is where we do our Twitch streams. I can't understand you. It doesn't matter if you're plugging. They are very good.

Go to lastpodcastontheleft.com to buy tickets for all our various live shows. And then go to, what else? Page 7. Page 7. You can come check out page 7. It's an unbelievable show, page 7. And also, what's going on with, you're done with Court of Thorn and Roses, right? Yes, but we are starting up with Crescent City Deep Dives. And what is that? That's a New Orleans? It's another one.

It is not, has nothing to do with New Orleans, no. Really? It is, no. Even though it's called Crescent City? Correct. No, it's been a thing in our home. It's Fae. No, it's the world of the Fae, but it is another series. Yep, it's another series from SJM. And we're really excited about that and come hang out with us. Yeah, good, good, man. Sarah Jessica Marker? Mm-hmm. All right, fuckers. See you in hell!

Also, I'll see you at the Side Stories show on September 13th in Chicago. Oh, hell yeah. Have a great time. We need to plug our show. Have a great time, guys. Carl's Jr.'s Big Carl fans know nothing beats the layers and layers of flavor of a Big Carl. Nothing beats that charbroiled beef, American cheese, and tangy Carl's classic sauce. Nothing except getting a second Big Carl for just $1.

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