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David Spade found out about his role as Hunter Biden on SNL just a day before the show. He had to scramble to get to New York, get a wig and suit, and rehearse the sketch, which was a challenge due to the tight timeline.
Sarah Sherman's portrayal of Matt Gaetz was described as terrifying and funny, with her using a big forehead and a twig-like appearance to create a memorable character.
David Spade suggested trimming the sketch to keep it tighter and more focused on quick jokes rather than long diatribes, ensuring it stayed within the show's running time and maintained its comedic impact.
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There's two people that rely on our voice. This is our job. Stand up this, whatever. Zycam is great because if you feel a cold coming on, I have Zycam in my bag. If you're on the road, give it a couple of squirts because your throat's sore, sniffling. That's when I go for it because it's sort of...
If you're already in the throes of it, it will speed it up. It will shorten. It will shorten the cold or reduce the symptoms so that the second you start feeling, because sometimes you go, oh man, am I getting a cold? And that's when you hit a Zycam. Boom, boom. Yeah, nail it. And it's kind of fun too. They have rapid melts, medicated food drops, a lot of flavors, you know. Nasal swabs. Nasal swabs. Those are fun. Sprays. Yeah. So you can get it in a lot of different ways.
If you feel a cold coming on at the first sign, reach for cold shortening products from Zycam, the number one cold shortening brand. And for best results, use at the first sign of a cold and continue to use until the symptoms completely subside. Pick up Zycam in the cold and flu aisle. Visit Zycam.com to see where to buy online. Our next one is fracture, Dana. Let's just...
We're going to go through this. So every year, Dana, I think this is it. This is the holiday. I killed it gift giving. And then somehow...
You get socks. I send you socks. Oh, Dave, it's socks. That's basically a cry for help wrapped in cheap cotton, partner. This year, you're leveling it up with the no fail jaw dropping gift. Everyone will love. Wait for it. Fracture. Fracture. That sounds something like I did to my ego in the 90s with when I read reviews. What is it?
It's genius. Fracture. No, listen, listen, listen. No, listen, all kidding aside. Listen for a second. I'm not joking. Fracture takes your favorite photos like that one of you rocking the bullet
and brings them directly on sleek modern glass. Hear me out. Hear me out. The colors are so vibrant, so stunning. It's like your, David, Hollywood memories all aglow. So any photos of me with the mullet on that lives in glory, that's...
That's like a hall of fame. I'll take that. Exactly. You starting to get it. Single, single prints, gallery walls, frame frameless. They've got it all. I'm telling you, I'm here to tell you, David, just upload your photo and boom, you're gifting like a pro. There's no effort required. That's good for you, which is perfect. So I don't need a toolbox because I have one screwdriver in the house.
And then you have one screwdriver right before dinner. It's a slippery snorkel. No, you don't have to lift a finger. They come ready to hang. No hammers, no extra holes in the wall. Just sleek, stunning glass prints that make people gasp. Even Aunt Barb. And she's a tough crowd. Barb. All right. I love it. So this year, no socks, no oven mitts, no candles, just fracture.
Thoughtful, personable, unforgettable. Fracture is, I'm going to just say this, whatever people think. It's the no fail gift that makes you a holiday hero. We both said no fail. Yeah. No fail. We're just going out on a no fail limb. All right. Well, finally, my mullet saves Christmas. What's the kicker? You get 30% off at fractureme.com with code flyfracture.
making bad gifters great sense whenever they started. Wow, you locked in and we are recording. Welcome to another edition of Scooper Fleek. Of Stupid Fly. Mm-hmm. Dana, Dana. Mm-hmm.
We should have a segment called Fly Swatter, where we just criticize movies and people. Welcome to Fly Swatter. Welcome. We'll take you down, and we're not afraid to take you down. We'll spray poison on you. There you go, Patrick. I just gave him a little face. He goes, does this count as something good? Do you want a clip? The only thing that happened to me funny today was...
I was at crunch gym in New York city and it was 18 degrees out. So it was, the walk was real interesting. My head was swollen up and stuff, but, um, they go, Hey,
Hey, listen up. Listen up, crunchers. There's a voice of God over the whole gym and he calls us crunchers. He calls us crunchers. Listen up, you crunchers. Please, please put your weights back in a quiet manner. Enjoy it. All right, crunchers. Keep crunching. Keep crunching, crunchers. I go, who thought of this?
But it was awesome. Were you doing crunches at the time? Yes. I know how to crunch my abs. People like to work out their... It's nonsensical. When people work out, they work out their strong muscles and work around their weak muscles. So if their back is weak, they're doing the lat pull. They just whip it back with their arms. If they're trying to do a stomach crunch, they just sit on the thing and they just make their neck go like this.
And I'm not talking about when I saw you at Crunchers, but you are a Cruncher. Nestle's is Crunchus. You would come in back in the day when we were on SNL. Prescriptive Fitness. Yes, and it's the same gym. Everything's the same. It's been expanded, but it's the same gym.
Oh, that's where you go? Gary Prince. Yeah. Now it's Crunch Botted from Gary Prince, my friend. God rest his soul. For real. That same spot on the way to Esnal. Yeah, and all the stairs as he built it out and went up. But I remember you would come in and you would work your biceps pretty good.
which is kind of the show muscles. We don't even need our biceps that much in life. No. Compared to our back and shoulders, but lats, quads, bleeps, sweeps, but you know, the Nick city dancers worked out there too. They get, he let them work out there for free. Oh yeah. I'd always see them. Then I'd go like this. You using these? Can I work in?
Want to do some dips. Yeah. Gravitron. I ran into Tony Danza in New York coming out of a hotel. Hey. It was someplace like a workout. So I said, prescriptive fitness. Tell him I sent you. Jeez. And he worked out during his Broadway run. I'm sitting down. Nice. So let's talk about the show was fun last week. Let's unpack it. But for the people who don't know.
Next time we'll make that really cut it close. Oh, there you go. People yell at me on the comments. You look amazing. Fucking comments. Dana, you got your jacket. Is that your warmest coat in New York? No, this is my indoor cool guy jacket because I stole it from the New York magazine thing. Oh, that's where you got it? I just walked out with it. Because I've been in stores...
Where I tried a jean jacket and it can go South so fast. Real. It can ride up. It can be too short, too big, weird collar jean jackets or not. So I, this works. So I stole it. The tag was for $98. I do not shop. I shop Amazon essentials. I don't care if that's a conflict of interest with our sponsors. We have to take that all out. Yep. $59 is my winter coat. You know, if you try something on, on a movie or on a TV show and it fits, it's,
You get something that works, you got to take it. Yeah. Yeah. Like hopefully. It's too hard to find. Yeah. I mean, so, so basically for people who didn't know, I've been doing some things on SNL like Biden and stuff. And then I always thought it'd be funny if David played Hunter Biden. I don't know why. There's some reason. And so that's what happened last Saturday night. And it happened on Friday at noon.
I was in the kitchen in my house in LA, cooking away, cooking stew for dinner. And then you gave me a heads up, said, hey, I think they're going to call you. I think you're in this cold opening. If you want to roll out, I think they're going to say come out. And then I went to eat at McDonald's and then Gervin's called. Hey, put the quarter pounder down. You like money? Yeah. Want to go out to SNL? Hey, handsome.
Landscape has changed. All the catchphrases. Landscape has changed. No one's getting any money out there, by the way. There's no money left. Not a drop. Oh, no. They don't get those deals. That's all smoke and mirrors. That's the old deals. They don't get those anymore. They don't get those deals. You want me to call back, see if there's another drop, try to get another drop out of them, squeeze them? I said, yeah. So I said, I should have just said, what's the least amount of money I can get for us now because I saw my contract. But-
Anyway, I went out. So I go home. They go, he goes, can you get on a 330 flight? I go, well, it's one and I'm at McDonald's. I don't think so. So I had to scramble to, and Heather rallied and we went out there, got in at 1 a.m. And then I call you my liaison and said, because all I know is really Dan Bula. I don't even have Higgins's number. So I said, hey, Donna. And you said, I just rehearsed it.
We're working on it. And then tomorrow we'll do it tomorrow in the evening. So, okay. My, my little, those 36 hours for me was because normally I come in, I do Biden and then I rehearse it Friday. But so I was fine in Thursday and then found out when I got off the plane or something,
church lady. I was like, holy, holy. Church lady of all things, yeah. Holy lady. So then, by the time I put, okay, who's going to be in it? You know, it was Marcello as Juan Soto, the baseball player. And it was, um,
Sarah Sherman as Matt Gaetz, of course, and he was Hunter Biden. So they're working backwards trying to figure out what to do. But then Friday night at midnight, we just ran a really rough draft, just sitting with the writers a little bit on Friday. And then
It was a little... Needed some work. Yeah, and I've never been that behind the eight ball when I would do a church chat. I would start on Tuesday and then work with Bonnie and Terry Turner or others, and then we'd go read through, do another rewrite, another rewrite. So I was glad it turned out as well as it did. You were great. Just had a funny take on Hunter. So anyway, so then...
it's Saturday. I get up early and I'm writing any joke I can think of to try to insert. You're just trying to recover. Tell us from your point of view now, what happened? So I'm just rotting at the hotel. And then, uh, I just say, they'll let me know. So I walked down 57 to see the big Louis Vuitton building that I thought was a, uh, CGI and then film something for my Instagram. Uh,
And then they said, oh, we'll send a car. I still haven't read it. They go, we got to get you a Hunter Biden wig and get you down here and get you a suit. So I went down around 3.30 or 4 and saw the old SNL. I remember this. Did you just kind of-
Where was your dressing room? Where was Adam's? Where was everybody's compared to what they had? That's always fun. It's all exactly the same. And I had a dressing room next to Dana. And that was Maya Rudolph had occupied when she was doing Kamala. Kamala. And you had a couch in yours. I did not. I had a couch. Who cares? I don't want to. It didn't matter. I wasn't paying for it, but I had a snack box or you want to call it.
And you would walk in about every 45 minutes and grab little chips. They weren't big chips or whatever you were grabbing. You'd look around, you'd grace without talking and then walk out. No, you wouldn't say anything. You were rehearsing and I'm like, yeah, I'm just looking at my script. You know, here's something interesting inside baseball. So I want to get there. They said, come in at four 30. It's basically dark. Times Square is lit up. I get in the car. I got very, very nice drivers. We're going to have to go around Mr. Cobby.
So as he's telling me, as we're going down toward Times Square, we got to make a left because it's thousands and thousands of people in the street. Nice weather Saturday. He goes, look, I'll be honest with you. If we can't go left here, we got to go all the way around. It's going to add one more hour, one more hour of travel. Fucking shit. Yeah. We got to go around Manhattan and Staten Island. We got to go around. So what I did and I never do it.
And I can hide in plain sight with this mug and this face. I put it out. You jumped out. Shut the fuck up. I didn't. I put the window down. There was like hundreds of people. And I was just hanging out, out the window, looking kind of like this. Just going, isn't that special? With the pump you up and all that stuff. So they started taking pictures. And the police woman noticed. And I said, can we go? I got to get to Saturday Night Live. So we were able to go down. Oh, my God. What a great idea. Yeah.
Good Lord. Face ticket works sometimes. Doesn't always work. Face card to the rescue. Yeah.
I did the same thing. I rolled it down. I said, isn't that special? They said, yes, Mr. Carvey, you're back. I said, I had to run out. I'm coming right back in. Well, that helps me a lot. If I was dressed as Garth, they would have sent a helicopter for me. Hey, I'd like to get by now. I'd like to go down 51st Street. What was funny is they had to put, you said that wigs are easy. They put, you know, Jodi's very sweet. She puts the, yeah.
saran wrap over my head. Then they go, it's like they're wrapping a present. It's just tape, tape, tape, tape, pushing me down, making me shorter. You know what I should have had you say? You should have said when I came out, Oh, Hunter, you look a little shorter than I remember. And I got, I got the weight of the world. Yeah.
You didn't look short. I mean, I'm shorter than Hunter probably. I'm still 5'12". So anyway, tape, tape, tape. I had maybe 30 straps of tape. And how many pins go right in? Oh, and then it was fucking pins. The pin store went out of business. It was like. Oh, yeah. Then they draw lines on your head. You know, they draw your shape. Then they go make the wig in seconds. I don't know how they do it. Mm-hmm.
And it's really my hair, but it's blacker, which makes me want to do my hair darker for the movie. I kind of like it black. And, um, and then I go and, and then they have to pin my little mullet back here up and then they go, shave your beard. And I go, I don't think I can cause we're starting. But you trimmed it. And they said, can you trim it? I think it was Lorne. And, uh,
I said, you tell Lauren, I don't fucking work here anymore. That little fit you threw just spread all across 8-H. Crew guys, who would spade it upstairs? What the fuck? I saw Marcello going, what the fuck? By the way, is it Marcello, Marcello, or Marshmallow?
That's funny. He's so sweet. He's a marshmallow. Marshmallow, but he is. Hey, marshmallow. Marcello. He is. Yeah. He's got a great attitude about this show. Great ass? What did you say? Attitude. Oh. He's got good fluffy hair. Your words, not mine. Now, when I said attitude, your ears heard assitude. Attitude.
You have any comment on that? Let me read this back. You tweeted this. This is a tweet from you. Can we pull it up? This is a tweet. A tweet. A tweet. From you. Your personal verified Instagram. Yeah. So it was fun. Go ahead. What do you mean it was fun? And so I got my wig. I got my... Then we did a rehearsal. You got the suit. Then we do a little tighten and brighten.
And then Marcello made fun of me because when I walked off, I pulled out my cigarettes and he goes, don't add stuff. That wasn't the script. Such a bust. And he goes, and when he said, you said the laptop adds, takes away two inches. You said, bye-bye. And I, and I get up and I go, maybe three. And he goes, added a line.
Pulled out cigarettes. That wasn't the script. Was that the dress show? That was dress. Yeah, that was dress. Okay. So that's funny. See that, but he can, he can do that. He noticed that, which was funny. Yeah.
He's good. He's, he's, uh, he's just fun, man. We got to get him on Suba, whatever our show is called. Whatever. One of our shows that orientate around an insect. What, what about Sarah Sherman looking like Matt Gates and terrifying everyone? Well, that's why the look, I don't forget it's Matt Gates or anything. Just her in that,
whatever it is it's funny whatever it is it's just and then she puts her chin down and does the smile with the big forehead she's such a fucking twig too and then she comes out later and she plays like every girl in every sketch
She goes, I'm barely in the show at all. I go, you're in 5,000 things. What are you talking about? I'm barely in the show. Everyone's got, I'm not in the show-itis. It's true. We all had it. I'm hardly in the show. There is something about a slight woman and she's very cute and in a suit playing a man. Because I've never felt more manly. Because you're playing a girl.
Well, that was the meta thing I didn't want to point out. I'm a man playing a woman. She's a woman playing a man. That never happened before in the history of skating. Even the great Milton Berle.
Never had a meta man, woman, woman, man talking, going toe to toe in that comedy, comedy atmosphere. Your words, not mine. I'm going to take another look. So Mr. Mayorkas. So that we do the dress show. So people don't know. So the dress show is pretty loud. I mean, it's a pretty fun. This is the eight o'clock two hour dress show.
So you do that. How, where's your comfort level coming off the dress show? That's, that's why you brought up for level was I got it. Fuck. I'm on a crush. I said, I don't, I go to you and also the writer people. I don't remember their names. They're very cool. And I said, uh, it's a young lady and there's a young man. And I said, thanks for putting me in this. I said, I don't want to be the sketch hog. This is Dana's sketch. But I said, I actually never do this, but I, I would like to be in it less. Yeah.
I said, you were very nice. You gave me a lot. But if it's just talking, there's not much of a good impression there. I would rather just hit the jokes and not have a big diatribe about Trump or this. I go, let's just Biden back and forth. I said, let's just get Dana laugh, me laugh, a couple laughs. And you've got the cold open shouldn't be too long. So funny, Dana.
Sarah as Matt, me, and then Marcello, and then get out. Did a little dance. And it turned out it got a little tighter. I don't know if your stuff got tighter, but you might have said the same thing. Oh, no. I mean, basically, as far as the show, Inside Baseball Alert. Inside Baseball Alert.
So there's a running timeline of the show and what Lorne thinks he can keep in the show based on sketches going long or short. So probably Friday night, that thing was 13 minutes.
All better. 14. Which is an eternity for a show, for TV. Yeah. And then it gets down to 945 for that dress show, but it needs to be under eight. Yeah. Still a little chubby. Little, little chubby. So there was a lot of trims and I look back at later, you know, I always have sketch regret of like some of those rhythms. I would have got into it differently as the church lady. I was a little bit rusty.
But well, isn't that special? Well, isn't that special? Well, I wanted to do that. I wanted to do like a monster voice. Hello, I'm the church lady and welcome to church chat. And then go, whoops, I'm sorry. I had a little sweat. Satan, get out of here, Satan. Usually I have a fist fight or I play the drums or some kind of weird thing. We did have the song at the end, which I heard you were harmonizing.
Satan had a good year. Satan had a good year. So that was twice as long at the dress and they asked for trims. Oh, Heather was trying to record me and then she got bored of me and she just drifted over that one foot gap and went into your dressing room and you guys were like, Satan had a good year. I know. I wish she'd done more of it. I would have posted. Yeah, here we go. Oh, there it is. Look at that.
The election, sure. Oh, I wish he'd gone longer. Mike Tyson. I know. I was a little bit, but I think they made all the great choices and great cuts. No, they did a good job. They did. We're not saying it was too long.
On their fault, it's just you put everything in and you usually have a read-through to figure stuff out and you tighten. Right. But we didn't see it until that night. And so, you know, okay, now Spade's in. Now he's here now. So let's see how it all goes. Now we got the costumes on and we got wardrobe. And then it's like, okay, tighten and brighten. As I said, the cold opening is so important. I would say vote to put it in read-through because I know they try to keep it very topical for Friday. Yeah. Yeah.
But I do think the song, I was happy with the button of the song. That really was. The time all nine of us were going, saying, you know, it's very good for the cold opening. The one thing that you and I tried, and it was just too long, it didn't quite work, was, you know, your pardon goes retroactive to 2014. So Church Lady starts to quiz you over what you remember.
Do you remember 2014? No. 2015? Not really. And then finally, 2013, a little blurry. Yeah, I see colors. What about 2019? I see some colors and shapes. A little aqua. I see some shapes. Yeah, some aqua, some purple. I remember pops and noises, buzzes and beeps. If we'd had that, we could have honed it and worked on it, but it didn't quite land. So it was one of the first...
things we lost. So you're hearing the inside baseball. The song was cut shorter and because it needed to be. And one less church lady dance across and back. I wanted to do two. You know, the superior, I wanted to go bump, bump, bump.
bump bump live from New York. Instead I went bump bump live from New York and with Satan had a good year and I would do Satan had a good year then another and I do this so I miss that rhythm but I feel like they made great cuts and they wrote some great jokes so I thank you too. It was fun to see and Heather liked this. Thank you to those guys. Sorry to cut that off. No not at all.
And Heather was excited to see like update rehearsing in the hallway or by the dressing room and just see how the whole inner workings, even I was forgetting how chaotic it is. Did Heather see the Saturday night live movie?
I have to finish it. Oh, okay. Yeah, no. So you saw some of it and how would you compare that? She has to finish it. She also has to start it. I love the movie and I want to see it again because I told Heather, go watch it because Jason Reitman meticulously made that exact studio. Right. And he tried to get a vibe of the whole history of SNL because it's a...
There's a lot of just hanging out, you know, in the end of the day, there's just a lot of rooms. It's kind of quiet. There's wig people coming in, knocking a lot and there's writers coming in. So we're going to cut this and cut that. And so people know with live TV, you do the dress show. You have a lot of things are cut and pasted, which is normal. So it'll just be on the cards. You don't ever get to really rehearse it. Not in specific. It's, you know, so it's, that's why the live show is exciting. Yeah.
Jason Reitman is on, I think, flying the wall next week to talk about it. Yes. Yeah. He, in 90 minutes, was trying to really capture the zeitgeist and the vibe. I think it worked because... I thought it was extremely fun and interesting. Yes. The chaos that, you know. Yeah. Christmas Day, he comes out. I want to watch the Esmone movie so badly now that I've already been. Oh, yeah. Heather wants to see the movie now that she's seen the behind the scenes. Page Desk, she really liked. And...
Oh yeah. She sat in with notes with Lauren. Remember I made him say it twice. He goes, and you know, he sits there and everyone waits and he goes a little too much blue in this. Don't put up the lights here. What are we waiting? Sarah look to the camera G on this, you know, just like barking out while everyone's going on. And then he goes, David, I believe, I believe you were. Yeah. You got the biggest compliment. I believe you were a hundred by five.
And then I go, huh? And he goes, I said, I believe you a hundred by night. But, um, I actually didn't hear him because Sarah was yapping about something. Oh, but anyway, I thought, uh, shabluzy was good. Jacuzzi, um,
The musical guest, his name was Scooby Dooby Doozy. No, that song is a catchy song. That's a real toe-tapper. That guy was cool. Looks like Derrick Henry. Big, huge, tough guy. Big guy. Super nice. But super sweet. And Paul Muskell, did I do it right? Paul Muskell. Was super enthusiastic, incredibly nice, and he...
I saw him at the after party. It was chatting for a while. I met his parents. Um, cause you left early before the cool stuff happened. No, I know. And he was going to come and then he had that corporate gig. And then I think it went a little sideways. So he didn't come. And I was, uh,
I was wiped out because Dana had a couch. I didn't, so I couldn't lay down and rest my beautiful head and my hair. Yeah, but my couch, it's not that comfortable. It's for goodwill. I may throw together another church chat this week so I can interview Chris Rock. Another one? Just a quick one, like a quick one where I interview Chris Rock about that corporate date where he stormed off. Wow, wow, wow.
We're getting paid to do a professional performance, but we storm off the stage. What if in his monologue he sees the cameras and goes, I didn't know there was going to be cameras here. And then he leaves the monologue. He leaves. And then Paul Muscala is going to be there this week, by the way. Oh, he is? Yes. He's going to just hang out this week. So then he goes back and he could go back and host if Chris storms off.
It's a double win. If Chris does storm off, then Paul will be there. It's even better rating. So you can use it. Calamity. It's called trending. Yeah. I might go to watch Chris. Remember I said I was going to, I told him I'd come out and then I didn't. And now I'm thinking of going because A, it was fun. And B, I said I was coming that weekend. He goes, so now you're not coming.
I go, well, it's not a knot. I'm just a fragile little dandelion. And so my throat is still dry, but it'd be fun. It's always fun, even though you're just walking around and
Well, one thing I can tell you, and I don't think you do this and I won't say who they are, but sometimes I've had friends come, uh, this fall to SNL and they're sitting, they're standing right in my line of sight, like right over my cue cards is their face. You don't want that, right? Chris Rock doesn't want to see you with a big smile. No, I wouldn't try that. Right next to the camera. You would, you're too smart for that, Dave. No, I wouldn't want to, I just sit in this dressing room or something, but, uh,
I remember the 40th I went out and watched and it was fun because that was just packed with everybody. We should get to, I think we've patted ourselves on the back enough for my two minutes of screen time. Well, mostly it was like the people that are interested in Saturday Night Live. Yeah. I agree. If you fast forwarded through this segment, we don't have any issue with that. Yeah.
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We will return 100% of their stake back in cash. BetMGM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly. BetMGM and GameSense remind you to gamble responsibly. See BetMGM.com for terms. 21 plus only. This U.S. promotional offer not available in Ontario. Gambling problem, Dana? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. Available in the U.S. for New York. Call 877-8-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY.
467-369. For Arizona, call 1-800-NEXT-STEP. For Massachusetts, 1-800-327-5050. For Iowa, 1-800-BETS-OFF. For Puerto Rico, 1-800-981-0023. Subject to eligibility requirements in partnership with Kansas Crossing Casino and Hotel. David, for lunch today... It's almost lunchtime, yeah. Do you have any... What are you going to do? What do you do? You know, sometimes I really just want to...
have fun i would get like um a really good turkey sandwich with avocado or if i really want to say the same thing really turkey i just had it yesterday yeah and maybe a few baked chips and then you'd want an ice cold pepsi which i don't what i like to do with pepsi is i fill the whole glass to the brim with ice and then i slowly pour the pepsi in and i make what i call a super pepsi
Yeah. Because the cold is great. That's a super Pepsi. It's not that super, but yeah. Well, I think if I say it's super, then it's kind of, it's closer to super. Well, in your head it's super. Because it's great. It's a super Pepsi. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Pepsi's been around our whole lives. It's not a regular situation. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I was flying this week and Pepsi on the plane, all Pepsi products.
The casino I just played, every restaurant and everything, you throw one in with lunch, dinner, and get a little caffeine going. You get the fizzy bubbles, and it's fun. And, you know, you share it with people. An Austrian friend of mine once said to me, quote, and you know what enhances those flavors and really makes them pop? It's an ice cold Pepsi.
I said, thank you, Austrian. So he gives it a pop. Yeah, he gives you a pop with the Pepsi pop. It's better than a regular pop.
Get a fizzy Pepsi in you and a pepperoni piece of pizza. You know, I've done that so many times. Well, yeah, I would say pizza and a Pepsi. They sound alike. They go together. You will lose your mind with pizza and Pepsi every time. Grab a Pepsi zero sugar for your next meal as food deserves Pepsi.
I will tell you one cool thing Dana did. You want to hear it? Of course you do. I don't think I did anything cool. So we're, we're, you know, with a page desk, as you see on TV, our dress rooms, if you're coming out of eight H to the right is music and the host to the left is where they make the cue cards and update hangs out. And then it's me and you, right? With those two dress rooms. So,
We're not too far off the stage. And they're like, 20 minutes till dress or air or whatever. Yeah. And then I got my wig on and we're just bullshitting and talking and I'm stealing stuff from you. And then they go, and I hear go four minutes to, no, they go five minutes to code open. And I start to get up and you go, you gone already?
And I go, well, I mean, how close do you want to cut it? A full five minutes. Yeah. We got a full five minutes to go and hang out. So I was like, well, I feel we should probably be around. It was maybe four minutes. You know, we can hang for two. And so-
We went out there and then I was like nervous. But it worked out. Well, that's Jenna, by the way. Jenna, who does all those casts. Cast to the hallway in 90 seconds. Everything has time in it. Even if you're not really nervous, it's just a sense memory of feeling nervous about 10 minutes till you're going to go online and download.
30 seconds. 30 seconds. Go, go, go. And then they're finally just pushing you to go shake Lauren's hand, Lauren Michaels hand. Oh yeah. You walk in and it's like a basketball game. You say hi to the coach. Number 32 playing Hunter Biden, Don Spirito, David Spado. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't want to give it away that I was in there because
People figure it out usually when you're in the sketch. I see the crowd go like this. Oh, it's this fucking guy. I thought he wasn't on the show anymore. But guess what? Here's my last comment about that night. So even with me, when you came out, you had the beard kind of dark. Whatever you did with the beard, you had the hair, and you had the suit on. I thought to myself, yeah, he looks really good. And then Paula, my wife, unsolicited, said, David looked very handsome on that sketch. So I'm sure you saw the comments.
You mean I went on and liked them all? No, I did like it when you said that. While you were taking a bath? I said I joined you two just so I could give it a thumbs up. But it is always a cool look. The suit fit perfect. The hair's back. And I was looking serious. I wasn't acting too goofy. I could have gone a little bigger with it, but no one even knows what he sounds like. He never talks. He's always...
Right to remain silent. I understand. It was, it was fine. We got, we got laughs. We got out. Oh, super fun. People enjoyed it. All right, let's go to the, go to the table. Anything this week. Oh, there's a funny one. I was going to show you.
Oh, yeah, this girl. Now, let's hear what she says first. This is a new niche. Here's a woman. Let's just hear it. Y'all, I just farted for the first time ever and sold it for a six day. I knew you'd like this. All I had to do was toot into a bottle. It was so stinky. I know he's going to love it. Follow for more? This isn't a joke, Dana.
I like the first comment. I don't belong on Earth anymore. Bro. I don't belong on this podcast anymore. Look, the sad part is this isn't fake anymore. Why would someone buy a fart in a jar asking for a friend? That's all funny. Farts in jars, I guess big biz. Humans have way too much free time. The robots are doing all the work. And money. My God, the monetization. You know what?
Guess what? Robots can't fart. That's the big hook, I guess. That's the last thing they'll take from us. Elon went like this right now.
Wait, that's a challenge. I'm Doc Mega. You can love my farting robots. Farting robots. Tesla goes up another billion when they introduce farting robots. By the way, he touched $400 billion. He went over $400 billion. He nicked it. Maybe it's up to $450 billion. Doc Mega, I'm basically a half trillion. He's going to land on his feet. Good for him.
So I think these girls are farting a jar. What a good part-time job if you work at like Lady Foot Locker and you want to make some extra cash. All you need is a can of beans. And who's buying the jar? Dard eyes. I don't know.
They don't find the people. Is it one particular person who's buying these jars? Remember that room you wouldn't show me in your house? Yeah. No, I'm the one that does the farting in them. It's like cameo. It's the new thing. You know, she farts in the jar. First of all, way too upbeat about it. What happened to being embarrassed? People be embarrassed a little bit.
Shame. Can I say something? And you try to top me. What is the most sort of kid-like, but fun way to talk about that activity? I'm going to nominate a windy pop.
They windy pop into the jar. Oh, I see. Windy pop is kind of, but I don't like the other word. I like windy pop. Heather? Come with me as I windy pop into this jar and sell it to some pervert in Wisconsin. Unless people go, what the hell is a windy pop? I like the wife going, babe, what's a windy pop? And why did you order 200 of them? Does Heather know what a windy pop is?
She's figuring it out. I think, well, anyway, this lady is skipping along and the music is funny. She's skipping into like,
you know, mailboxes, et cetera. And she's tapes up her windy pop. She puts an address on it. It's like a whole shenanigans. It's, it's so weird. And then she's like, that's a wrap today. I worked. Now I'm going to take five and relax. Yeah. How do you know when you're working? When I hear this sound. Yeah.
It's a car. I don't know, NASCAR, Wendy Pop. The guy goes, she goes, this guy requested a bubbler.
That's a little more. Has any podcast ever literally, can we get canceled on, I mean, can they get canceled in the middle of an episode? For being too stupid? Let's go on to our second one. Yeah, let's go. Sorry, we did enough. No, that was a good one. Okay, here we are. Oh, here we're in the same. This is what it says. Should I say it? Yeah, you read it. OnlyFans model Sophie Rain says she's a Christian and a virgin. Don't have to give yourself up to everyone. Okay. How about anyone?
But she's the one that's 20 that she said, I like they always reveal to puff up, but she made 40 million last year. So my shock to this reading it is I feel like it's one or the other. Are you an OnlyFans model or are you a virgin? Maybe it's true, but I thought they do P-O-R-N. I thought so. I thought they did Korn, but I don't know if they do Korn.
Right. OnlyFans is not... I guess she's flirtatious and friendly. It's just Instagram. In my head, what is different? If you're not doing...
Well, I know that it's more built economically for Venmo or subscription-based. Say you get a million horny men globally. The digital audience is $5 billion in aggregate potential for her. You get a million horny men that just like you, want you to be their surrogate girlfriend, and they pay you a million a month. Now, what is that per year, David? That's $2 million.
12 million. Here's the other thing. In olden days, the tribal elder, the grandpa of the tribe was 28. People were having kids at 8, 9, and 10. So nobody was a virgin at 20. That'd be grandma. Grandma already had two batches of kids. But in today's sexed up, crazy world, a 20-year-old virgin...
Steve Carell has to remake the 40-year-old virgin into how funny it is that he's a 20-year-old virgin. That's how decadent this world is. 20-year-old virgin is funny. That is funny. And you think in this biz, like Catch Me Outside girl, who of course I'm business acquaintances with. Catch me outside? I always have to say, not to be rude, I was shocked it wasn't either full nudity or full corn because...
What is everyone paying for? Just, hey, here's me. I'm going to the Grove and hang out at the mall. She's just sort of friendly and stuff. Yeah. I mean, she's perfectly cute. This girl is perfectly attractive, but 43 million on her first year. That blows my 12 million. We are definitely in the wrong business. 100% in the wrong business. Okay, moving on. Seems like a lovely lady. It's a good wrap up. But she seems great. Yeah. Good for her. Seems cool.
Good for her. It's hard for me to make half that much. Oh, this is a big story. Your girl, Hawk Tui. Yeah. I call her Hawk Tui. I guess it's Hawk Tua. Because a church lady said, instead of worshiping Hawk Tua, you should go to a church. Go to a church. It was a tough line to land. You should go to a church. Go to a church. That was good. I like that phrasing. She did, I didn't even know you could do this.
She launched a Bitcoin about herself. I don't know. I know you could do this. Why aren't we doing this, Dana? And then rugged it. It doesn't mean rigged. I think rugged it is when you pull the rug out. So she did see that little chart. She does a Hawk 2E, some sort of crypto alt horseshit. And then she puts it out to her fans. It starts to go up. God knows why. Save us. And then someone buys it. Why? Yeah.
on god's green earth and then they pulled they sell and so it's just a typical you buy a hot two oh you get stuck with your taking your hand now yeah there might be somewhere that i don't know did she does she hawk two on each coin that would make it worth more she goes like this it's a genuine there you go there's one package it up
I won't be gross, but I don't know how this works. She seems like a lovely lady and Bitcoins are like fake air. So there's not really physical ones to do that too. But I do. And they say she ripped everyone off. I feel like she gets, I heard a phone call between all these people online and they were all talking with real Bitcoin sharks and the guys that rep her that are part of it. I think they probably just said, Hey, do this with us. You'll make money.
And meanwhile, they don't know what, she doesn't know what they're going to do. And they just do it because they're talking about all this lingo back and forth and arguing. One guy saying, oh, you ripped everyone off. She ripped. And they're like, no, this is blah, blah. And they, I was like, oh, these guys know what they're doing. I love this new world. I can't wrap my mind around it. It's just, you know, member one was ETS. Didn't Justin Bieber buy like a smiley face? Oh yeah. NFT. For like NFT for 3 million. Yeah.
Well, ladies and gentlemen, what happened to ETFs? Now, who would ever believe that a monkey wearing sunglasses in a photograph wasn't going to be worth $80 million? A digital picture of a monkey wearing sunglasses. It's a giraffe on a skateboard.
And he snapped it up. I paid $11 million. And somehow it went down to $80. And then the giraffe on rollerblades went for $1.50, and it was cooler than what I paid $11. So I don't know what to say. We have a theme on the show. We have SNL behind the scenes, and now we have digitization of monetization of sexuality and absurdity.
Yeah. That was a good way to put it. Thank you. We should tell Chris to be Chris Rock Tui. All right. What about Chris Rock? That's his real name is a great name. Chris Rock. Chris Rock is, he said it once at SNL. He goes rock and spade. People think we made them both up for showbiz. I go, why would I make it? I would never think I'd be in the showbiz. I got, I just got lucky. My dad,
gave me a name and took off but he did do gave me a good name okay so we should talk about the uh the killer luigi the the guy with the ceo it's such a huge story this week i think you guys will probably do something you know emil emil he should play that kid yeah he could he should play him or one of the menendez brothers just without going too dark just it occurred to me
occurred to me. So he maybe makes a, a, a play gun. He 3d models, a gun. So he knows that he's a, he's a Yale grad or he's a brilliant guy. And he, he knows he has probably, I'm going to say top five globally of intensity of eyebrows. So he knows cameras are in the Starbucks. And so there's a picture of those eyebrows and he's a man on the run.
Yeah. Usually when people, well, usually when people are on the run, they get into a cheap motel and they shave what look. So you shave the eyebrows off. Yeah. The giveaway. You're right. You put glasses on, dye your hair red or something, but he's hanging out there. So my question is, did the young man want to get caught?
Right. She should have called you because he could have shaved his eyebrows off and then drawn on little skinny ones like- Yeah. And then wore glasses. You know, the cashier, El Pollo Loco. Yeah. And also wore a fake beard. And then just anything. Anything. Fake beard beforehand. He could have put on my Hunter Biden wig. He also, you know, he looks a little like- No, I can't say. But I think-
By the way, every girl's in love with this killer because he's good looking. Good looking always wins. It just gets you out to be a killer and he's getting more clicks on Tinder. Well, it was weird. There was a strath of humanity that did a Robin Hood deal on him. Like he's justified. It's a Robin Hood move.
that's a little, little bit too far for me. It's a bit of a stretch because if you're allowed to kill people, you don't like, of course, I mean, you are judged jury and executioner. You decided you, I mean, if it works both ways, if you can just always just go around and kill people that are, yes. Oh, that's Heather's theory is he's trying to eat.
Heather's asking if he's trying to get healthcare in prison. I'll see if Dana knows this answer. - Is he trying to get healthcare in prison? - Like he couldn't get it. They said he hurt his back and he couldn't get healthcare. And so he's trying to get in prison. There's a news story just out that his family owns nursing homes and they're under the gun for ripping people off. I'm like, wait a second, that doesn't make any sense.
Right. There's a whole lot of ripping off going on. Because he's supposed to be Robin Hood. Yeah. But the other thing is, was it too easy to catch him? That is a good question. Well, you got caterpillar or a double, triple caterpillar eyebrows and you're just going around. Yeah.
You know how many times Eugene Levy got called in? They spotted him around town. Eugene Levy had to go into hiding. But I would say they could have an eyebrow off for charity before they put him in prison. An eyebrow off. They could sell his eyebrow hairs to women and make them. But they released the call of the elderly lady at the McDonald's. Hi, I
I think I know who the killer is. He's sitting right over there with triple caterpillar eyes. I swear to Jesus, that's your man. And the cops came in. That's right. And he had one picture, like the best picture he's taken in his life. He's got the hood on. He's smiling crooked. And every girl's like fucking, you know, Splash Mountain. You know what I'm saying? What?
There wasn't a dry seat in the house. Yeah. You know what I mean? It was like Katrina down there. You know what I mean? That's not true. Women don't like- Every girl on TikTok is like, how can I date this guy? It was the please fuck me killer. And all they cared about is how good looking he was. And I'm like, this is- You shot someone. They always skip that. I know. They go, ah, that guy's not good. Well, he let it-
The gentleman, I don't want to say his name, but he also had Superman abs. So it's caterpillar, triple caterpillars, and then basically Superman abs that he conveniently takes a picture of. Washboard. Yeah, and then he was super smart. So that's a sex trap for...
Yeah, but he also on his manifesto, like the girls are like getting a little less horny when he's too similar to the Unabomber. They're like, oh, and he has a manifesto that always looks good on the res. I have a manifesto and one of them was, he said, should I just bomb this whole convention?
of these bean counters at the, where the CEO was going. So if he did that, I think they'd be like, nah, that's a little, well, what's, how do you, when does just a public note become a manifesto? What are the rules? I mean, you went to state school, right? What's the definition Webster definition of a manifesto, sir? I give it to you right now. You have 10 seconds. It's a big word. And, uh, you know, I'm going to tell you, you tell me what it means. I'll tell you if you're right. Yeah.
That's better. I guess just in the modern times, modern parlance, it's someone who wants to reorientate society with a public statement. And the manifesto will include what is wrong with the current society and what should be changed. Right. Here's a couple of easy fixes. I think you're right. I think you're right. Usually they try to keep it to under 600 pages. You can't make it too long because no one's going to read it.
You know what I mean? If I send Sandler a text that's over a paragraph, he's not reading it. You know what I mean? You got to be kind of... So manifesto feels like it's got to be long. It doesn't have to be. Not in the YouTube or Instagram age. Just one paragraph can be a manifesto. This is an ad for a new...
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It's the future, right? It's horrible when toilet paper fails you. And you've used the restroom and then your significant other says, did it please you or did it fail you? And you just go thumbs down. Total fail. Yeah. Also, they're making it skinnier, I think, toilet paper because...
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Which reminds me, TikToks are getting long. Oh, let's talk about also the space orbs over New Jersey. Have you seen them? I have. I mean, I've not seen them. I haven't gone on the roof of the hotel and looked out toward New Jersey. I mean, it's too cold. It's too damn cold. I should have done it during the heat wave in late September. I guess aliens aren't that cold. Well, what is the theory? What are they? What the fuck? What do we pay taxes for? Orbs.
From where? Orbs. No, they are just, you know, it's just orbs.
I like how everyone says orbs like anyone knows what that is. But there's a congressman that thinks it's from the Iranian mothership is releasing them, but not explaining what a mothership is. You know who has motherships? UFOs. Not frickin' Iran, right? Yeah, not a small mid-eastern country does not have a mothership. That's Star Trek Next Generation. I feel like my real one is there's a mothership alien ship under the sun.
under the ocean and they shoot out because there's so many out of the ocean and it's so much closer than Mars. He wants to fly that whole way. It's like pop out of the ocean, beep, bop, boop. You're right here. You're in New York. If it's something to do with the Mothership Comedy Club in Austin, I'm not the first to say it. Oh, maybe that's it. That's a great ad if it is. Joe Rogan might be doing this as sort of a comedy, a meta sort of public comedy.
You know, like a David Blaine thing, you know? Right, like a Kill Tony promotion. Kill Tony, David Blaine. And I do think it's real. I do think it's spacious because even the mayors, even the governors, we're trying to find, we don't know what it is. We fly planes up there. We can't catch them. They fly away. Well, do we have good high-tech video of the jet chasing them? Do we have that to look at?
to look at. And they got a close up of the pilot going this slow down. Cause every time, I mean, we have these three dimensional, incredible cameras. We can see the moon and 3d color. And every time it's UFO, it's like a greenie black and white. And the camera's going like this. It's like a camcorder from the eighties. I call,
bullshit. We got to get Dr. Stephen Greer. I'm calling a challenge to him. Let's get him on next week. Come back on Superfly and tell us what the hell is going on over the skies of New Jersey. I think he's going to say they're ours or some are ours, but I think we do not want to keep shooting him down. Do you really want to trifle with these men? Well,
I don't know. I mean, I see things that other people don't see. So I looked at the picture and I sort of just with my finger just sort of spelled, you know, connected the spaceship dots. Right. And it said Dr. Greer phone home. And I don't know if that's real, but that's what the words that I saw spilled in the in the New Jersey sky. Can you sing a song called the New Jersey sky? Yeah.
I talk about E.T. in my new special. I talk about all the hot subjects. Going back to 82? What the fuck? Yeah, I don't know. No, it doesn't matter. Louis C.K. had an incredible bit about Good Will Hunting last year. And I thought, wow, that's cool. Oh, he's funny. I'm going to do more movie reviews on my special. Okay, what about the... Oh, I won't talk about Jamie Foxx. Okay, do the next one. Let's see what the next one is. Jamie. Okay. Okay.
Brooklyn's first luxury building for dinks starts leasing. Childless renters have mixed feelings. Okay. A dink is what? It must be couples without kids. What does it spell? Did I not...
Kids? Oh, dual income, no kids. Oh, dual income, no kids. Okay. So there's a 13-story high-rise on 655 Union Street. That's by you in Brooklyn. Uh-huh. So are you allowed to say no kids when you sell something? That's a really good question. Legally, I wonder if you can do it. A wink and a nod, maybe you could do it. This is kind of for...
You know, people with two incomes, no children and not even a dog are just called happy people with a lot of freedom. They're just called people with no problems. People are just like trying to think of what's fun thing to do right now. But love kids and love dogs. I don't know. I want to I want you to follow up on this story. No. What if you get knocked up while you're in there dinking it up? And then what do you do? You get kicked out of the club.
Well, this was made famous by Jimmy Durante in 1951. He would say, I think... Let's look at a clip. I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... He did. You can find it. I think... Jimmy Durante... That's Green Panther. I know. The melody was off, but he was a rough-voiced crooner, a funny comedian named Jimmy Durante. Look it up. I remember. I think...
I think, and that's how he would sing. And he would say, dink. Did he say dink? I'm my memory. My old memory says he said, I think, I think. And then he went on to, I think. Okay. Keep going. Let's see the next one. Anyway, just one of no person. Okay.
All right, President Trump manhandles French president. Meeting right after. Trump manhandles French president Emmanuel Macron with one of the most dominating handshakes I've ever seen. That's the funniest thing. Look at him. Take that, you motherfucker. Oh, and his elbows up and everything? Oh, way up like this. That's hysterical. Shoulder way up.
Don Trump. He just threw out his clavicle. Donald Trump, look at my shoulders. I can pull on your dinky shoulders any day. You're a dink. You're totally a dinky dink. Dude, he pulls on his shoulders. Then he has an extra padded shoulder pad. He's like this.
Well, he's a Batman villain in like a long penguin coat. That's hilarious. He's going around Gotham City with a big orange hair. You know, he presents with the lifts and the thing. He's like 6'5", with his giant head. McCrone's about our size. He's 5'3", weighs 99. He pulled him up with his shoulder. That's like a hard move for his age. I hate to say it. It's kind of a dick move. It just makes everyone look like a pussy. And you see it coming. It's usually the corkscrew. He goes in. Grrrr.
And then gives him the saw. Yeah, that's tough because the guy's like, oh, he says, is he like a peaceful? Oh, see, let me get out.
Dude, the rest of the meeting, the guy's like this. What? Yeah, go ahead. He's the leader of one of the greatest countries in the world, France, Paris. He's like, I am feeling so little right now. I can't believe those giant... And they say Trump has little hands, but not so much. He's got French hands. That's like a Theo Vaughn kind of observation. I figure like French...
People have like little hands. It doesn't make sense, but it's funny. Like a little raccoon. Like a little raccoon, a little French. Raccoons are French. You know where I say that? The way they speak. All right, next one. I want another handshake one. Okay, here we go. That was funny, though. Okay, oh, this is a slap off. This is Dana White's. I think it's Dana White's. Who else is slapping? Slap is... Oh, this show. I know. The beast.
Dana, look at that. What? What happened? That's not real, is it? If your ear comes off, he's got a fake ear. Fake, yeah. He's got a fake ear, but it's a prosthetic. But why are you getting hit on the side with the ear? To get this fly off thing. That tattoo is pretty cool. I have to say on his face.
Everything's cool about it. And what, per the theme of our little show today, he's going to monetize us. We got Hawk Tooey girl. He can be ear gone guy. And he's going to have a million digital followers. Just talk about. Dude, I have to say, if you're here, I would want it to stick on at all times. Like don't hit it as hard as you can. You're in the wrong biz, dude. Go into farts in a jar. Actually,
There's another story I didn't tell you about because it's all a little, you know, base for you, as my dad would say. I'll go there. But there's an OnlyFans girl that I saw today in the paper. She's feeling slight regret after breaking the record of sleeping with 100 guys in one day. 100 folks. And she goes, I cried after. Obviously, I would cry during. And then she said, but I am going to try to go for 1,000. I'm sorry. Mm-hmm.
So I don't even know how it works. Mental health is an issue today in America. Is it an all time low? We, uh, we've got issues as a society, um, way too much free time, but, um, yeah, I don't know. I just think it's, I saw that story too. And, um, it's another attention getting, like, it's a great way to get, you got to get people to your only fans. Like I was saying the other day, and this is a bad example, but I saw this thing on the Dodo, this Instagram where it's like a dog, uh,
is out like at a carnival or something or it's out, you know, and then someone sees it as a ski resort and goes, Oh my God, is this dog alone? And then they take it and give it. And you know, the dogs in the shelter are going, just do it the right way. I'm doing it the right way. I'm in a shelter. This dog goes out in some weird spot and then gets all the attention. Of course gets,
adopted right away. I'm trying to do it by the book. I go to the shelter. I wait. I sit in a little square. I act cute. No. So that's the OnlyFans girl. There's just a diamond. There's a lot of them. All right. I'm going to make an announcement. There's a lot of them. And then they go, I'm going to be different. I'm going to do whatever. She's different. She's fucked 100 guys. Different. I caught my attention. I'm going to say this phrase for 24 hours with maybe just
two bathroom breaks, horn dog. How about a hot dog? And I'm going to say horn dog. How about a hot dog over and over again for a record or 24 hours and see if I can monetize that. Well, if you would go on Twitch or some sort of live stream and say, just send me money.
And I'll keep saying it. And then people would, we got to do something like this. Well, it's a cameo cameo, but they only give you 150 bucks. If you do a, you know, an advertisement for, you know, Leo's, uh, use card dealership in Des Moines, you know, Hey, this is David Spade. Hey buddy. I know we would never do that. Meanwhile, in about five seconds, we're going to read an ad.
we would never sell out never we sell anyway here's a word from our sponsor here we go bob our friends that's they are okay what's next we're almost done but what's next let's see we really covered a lot data i know really excited oh this young lady does a bunch of trick shots and i think they're all pretty good i think we saw her before right
Okay, more tricks. Oh, yes. That's hard to do. To hit it with a baseball bat? How many? Put the number of misses. I know. Look at that trick. Number seven. I couldn't do literally one of these. Is there one you could maybe do? Not that one. Too hard. Maybe a thousand tries? I don't know. Number six. Maybe...
Maybe this one I could do. But even one is... I can maybe do that. I made a drop kick half court shot. No joke. Ooh, it's like a bunt. She is strong. She barely... She's got a lot of coordination. She has the same reaction. I think we should mix up the reactions for her. Golf? With a golf. Oh, okay. Number two. We're going. She keeps saying, let's go. We're going. Great. And that...
I can do the first one. Number one. I'm blindfolded in this shot. It looked like she more had a mask on her mouth. What they don't tell you is she started that segment in 2017 and she finally hit them through the power of editing. No, she's got an actual coordination. She does look good when she does it. If you're a trick shotter and that's your biz, and now there's AI. Now there's AI, so people just go yawn.
No one knows if it's original. No one knows if anything's original. All we can say is, are you not entertained? And I was entertained because of her celebration. I look at fishes in the ocean. I was actually going to show you some today. These fishes that when they're like, we went to the bottom of the sea where the fish have no light. It's like prehistoric. And of course, there's shining light on them. The fish is like.
And then they go, never seen light. They're in light as we speak. And then they're the most scariest looking fish, large mouth, lunker bass. And then some have teeth. And then someone in the comments on one, I keep liking these and I keep seeing more. And then someone goes, oh, I think these on this one are AI. And I go,
I remember as a kid watching Jacques Cousteau. You remember Jacques Cousteau, The Fish in the Sea? And it'd be at the bottom of the sea and there'd be this thing like it's a half inch long and it's got antenna and a big bug eye and all it, it's a whole existence just at the bottom. It lives in a little area. It's like, yeah, I don't know.
And even as a kid, I would think to myself, what is the point? Why are you living? You look ugly. Why is that a lot of fun? And then he goes, I think I'll have kids. Sometimes he goes like...
You want another one of these? Then it looks over at a little shell for an hour and then goes back. Looks at a rock. So boring in the bottom of the ocean. What is the point of that existence? No, I would not do that. You could monetize that shit today though. Woo! If you just showed me the bottom of the ocean and the fishes that float by and go...
And I would just be mesmerized. The ones that are like three inches long seem like behemoths. Oh, did I send some? All right. You go off and I'll hit you later. Thank you, audience. Thank you for. Oh, yeah. Come see me and Dane at Fantasy Springs in Palm Springs. We're going to do a gig. Let's pump that thing, man. I want that thing. I want that thing clean. It's filling up. I already checked. I want that to go clean.
Yeah, we're going to bring it. We're going to do Q&A. We're going to do stand-up. Yeah. All right. Bye, guys. Mm-hmm. This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly. It's executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro, and Greg Holtzman. Hope you liked it. Mm-hmm.