#2765 RHOA S16E02 Part One: Grilling the Hot Dog Man
55:33 Share

One of the reasons we love watching Bravo shows is for the luxury. I mean, come on, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Most of the time I can just watch it for the shots of the gorgeous city and the houses. And let's not forget Lisa Barlow's $60,000 ring that she lost. Oh, heck yeah.

If you're looking for a way to experience luxury for yourself, try Virgin Voyages. Over $1,000 in value is included in every sailing. Everything they offer, from their menus created by Michelin star chefs to their cabins designed by top international firms, is the pinnacle of luxury.

of luxury. Virgin Voyages cruises are kid-free and catered to adult tastes, and they have some incredible destinations. We're talking Caribbean escapes, Iceland and the British Isles, Miami, New York. You can even live out your below-deck med fantasy with their Lux Voyage in the Med. I am so excited to go on my first Virgin cruise. You know, the idea of a kid-free ship is very appealing to me,

And all these menus. It's like definitely a boat made for Ben. It looks like a giant, gorgeous club with fabulous rooms. I cannot wait to go. Book now at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor.

Behind every BP fill-up, thousands of people across America go to work every day. People producing energy offshore. People turning it into products at our refineries. People doing R&D to make products that are better for your engine. People trading and shipping fuels to their destinations. And the people who help you at one of BP's growing family of retail stations.

They're part of the more than 300,000 jobs BP supports across the country. Learn more at bp.com slash investing in America. As you write your life story, you're far from finished. Are you looking to close the book on your job? Maybe turn a page in your career? Be continued at the Georgetown University School of Continuing Studies. Our professional master's degrees and certificates are designed to meet you where you are and take you where you want to go.

At Georgetown SCS, the learning never stops, and neither do you. Write your next chapter. Be continued at scs.georgetown.edu slash podcast. ♪ Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap

It's been like an hour and a half.

It's been 90 minutes. I mean, I feel like we've crossed borders together today. We've been in different countries today. We're super cosmopolitan, guys. We've been all over in one day. We were just in Canada this morning, and here we are back at home to record three shows. We're super excited. We had the most fun this weekend. We went to so many places. We went to Cincinnati, Minneapolis, and Toronto.

We were honestly worried that that last show in Toronto, that was a classic recap of New York. And we thought, oh gosh, this is our third in a row. We're a little rusty. You know, a couple of years have passed. I've got...

Yeah, I haven't fixed my Botox. It's like, are we even going to remember? We had so much fun. The audiences were so great. It was so amazing to hug you guys and get to know you guys and just, I don't know, hear you. You know, we talk to you all the time, every day, literally our whole lives. But to get to see you and to hear you is just such a treat. So thank you for everybody who's coming to see the mounting hysteria tour. We are continuing. We're on a tear. We're going to be going this week, next week, this week.

This week? This week. To Charlotte, Atlanta. We're going to be doing Southern Charm finale in Charlotte. And then Atlanta, we're going to do a classic episode because that's a Sunday night show. And we just, you know, we really love doing classics. Bring me some Shannon Bedore classic, okay? So we're going to Ireland. We're going to be doing...

season. I don't even remember the episode number. I don't remember the episode number, but today is St. Patrick's Day, which is all you need to remember because we are going back to Ireland. We're recapping the classic Ireland trip. When we were in Ireland, we recapped the first part of it. I don't remember the episode number. I'm sorry. That's super unprofessional, but you know what? Go to our Instagram and look at it. We'll also announce it the rest of the week so you guys get it, but it's posted on our Instagram, so go look at it there.

And then after that, we are going to be going. By the way, what I was going to say is for those who are trying to remember what the episode is, what I was going to say is that it is the second part of that Ireland trip where they get Kelly wasted and then there's a screaming match in the van late at night. And also Megan goes and asks people, are you a no tool? So look forward to that one and we'll get the name up and the episode number fairly shortly. Yeah.

Yeah, it's on our Insta, so check it there. And then we're going to be at the Lincoln Theater in Washington, D.C., Philadelphia after that, and Boston, and then Detroit, Chicago, Austin, Dallas, and Vegas. So go get your tickets over at WatchWhatCrapHands.com.

People are asking about the meet and greets. They should be available as an add-on at the end when you're purchasing. It's like an add-on thing. So thanks to everybody who's been coming out. We also did one of our favorite things this week was an airport snaps, which is where we recap people in airports.

This was the Cincinnati airport and we just sat in the food court and judged the fuck out of people. It's so much fun. Go check that out over on our Patreon. If you want to catch up on Traders Recaps, those are over there. We'll probably do another Airport Snaps coming up this week. And then we're trying to decide what the next show to cover on Bonus is. Will it be Secret Lives of Mormon Wives? We don't know. Will it be Love Island? Will we wait for that? We don't know. So give us your ideas in the comments.

How about that? Yeah. Ask for stuff. Yeah, exactly. And the episode of Orange County is bringing up old ghosts. Season 11, episode 16. Thank you, Ben. Thank you. Ben is prepared.

Well, I wasn't that prepared, but there was enough time for me to go onto our Instagram and pull up the name and the episode. I can make myself useful at the very least. I'm a little flibberty-driven, okay? I just got back from the airport. I didn't even take off my jacket. I haven't even peed, okay? But I did get a Starbucks. So let's do this. It's Real Housewives of Atlanta, season 100, episode 2. Fun episode.

i thought hot dogs and hot mics that's the name of the episode so we actually pick up uh where the last episode left off which is that shamia is having this birthday party and the entire cast is upstairs they've taken the elevator up to this random room and now they're all talking and basically uh there's confrontation about drew uh working with music icon dennis the hot dog guy and is this a violation of girl code

And it's really cool because his label, he's just going to add an exclamation point to the end of hot dog. So instead of like the hot dog king, it's just going to be hot dog. Yeah.

So Shamia's like, okay. She's like, well, three people have said that they've seen you. Like, cause they're wondering if Drew and Dennis are dating. And Shamia's like, well, three people said that they saw you at the club and you got to look like, you look like you guys were all booed up. And she was like, Oh God, stop playing now. Of course not. And, and they're like, yeah, they said that you were even matching. She's like,

What? Not matching. No, not me. But of course, this Drew is like a pathological liar. I don't believe a word she is saying. And I think that Drew is either getting down with hot dog man, or she's at least happy to fan the flames of that gossip because she's just excited that people are talking about her.

She is at least blowing hot dog guy. There, I said it. I believe it. And then we see a picture. Someone has a picture on their phone and they're like, we saw the Instagram picture and we only see hot dog man's arm, but it is matching. It is the same color as her outfit. And you know, Drew's line because she does this thing when she lies where she squeals all of her words. So they're like, are you having sex with him? And she's like, stop.

And they're like, okay, but you're matching. She's like, not matching. She does this really high squeal thing, so you know she's a damn liar. And she's lying in a Patsy Stone wig and a Vonna Trump wig, so it's not going well for her. I have to say that the hot dog thing on Bravo right now is very real, and I just have my latest update, because I feel like now I'm updating with any piece of hot dog news I have in my life, is that I went to a very fancy restaurant last week,

And the first course was basically, it was like a cube. It was like a cube of like gelatin. It was like, it was like molecular gastronomy and had little bits in it and was served on a postcard that had like a picture of like Chicago hot dogs. And it was like, this is this little cube of gelatin. It has the flavors of a Chicago hot dog. You just eat it in one bite. And I was like, this is crazy. And I took a bite. I swear to God, I,

It tasted just like a hot dog. I am blown away. So that is my latest hot dog news, which is that I had a cube and it tasted like a hot dog. So how can you eat like an actual hot dog that is flavored to taste like a hot dog? Cause you know, that shit is flavored, right? It's just like, it's like,

nose cartilage that's ground up and then they put flavoring and coloring and everything else in there so God knows what it even is and they flavor it to taste like hot dog and then everybody's like oh my God that's so unhealthy that's so processed that is such processed fear I can't believe you're eating that it's like the worst thing to ever happen to the earth that's why the earth is eating us

and then somebody makes a piece of gelatin that tastes like hot dog which is the most processed and people pay 500 for it and i'm like look at me i ate a piece of gelatin that tasted like a hot dog i'm fancy like it's unfair

There's a lot to unpack there. And we'll just, we'll let the food scientists in our audience do all the explaining. But what we can say is that hot dogs and Ben Mandelker are having a moment right now. We are in the thick of the hot dog-ness. Okay.

So then we oh, by the way, we saw Tim Hortons at the airport and our friend Caitlin gave us gift certificates to Tim Hortons. But it was on the other side of the fucking glass and we couldn't. It was on the other side of the American quarantine glass. Talk about flavored something that could be flavored like a hot dog. I wanted to go over there. We couldn't do it. Sorry, Tim.

Okay, so Cynthia's still here. So she's like, well, I better not find out that anybody's booed up with Peter Anthony Thomas. Well, don't worry about it. Isn't he in prison? I think if he's booed up with anyone, it's with a very, very large man with teardrop tattoos. Yeah, and not in a hot way. So then Angela...

I don't know, with Peter Thomas. Even Peter Thomas can't make like hot prison porn hot. Like he just can't do it. So it's just sad. It's like, no.

Um, so then Angela says, um, she's like, I know they didn't do the prom matching outfit. So they're all just commenting on the fact that Drew and Hot Dog Dennis were matching. And Cynthia's like, I'm going to need them to not even be boot up with James Michael Hill with the matching outfit on. Please find someone else to match with and boo up with. Okay, Cynthia. All right. It's nice that Cynthia's back, but I'm going to need, I'm going to need some better content from her.

Well, you know, she's trying. They're not letting her do much. And it's Cynthia. You know, she's not really here to do much. She's just here to show us her kitchen counters and make a comment every once in a while. I think she's just there to provide some familiarity with the audience. You know, because there's a reboot and people would be like, oh my God, new people. What do I do? They're like, okay, here's Cynthia Bailey. You're safe. Everything's okay. Cynthia Bailey is here. Everyone's like, okay, I can do this. It's true.

It's true. And also they had to cut their budget a lot, you know, so they're getting Cynthia because they fired Cynthia already. So she's cheaper now. You know, she's like, OK, five dollars. I will do it. I need to pay for, you know, the

Bailey Lake or Lake Bailey, Lake Bailey, right? What's it called? It's like when you go, yeah, yeah, Lake Bailey. It's like when you go to, it's like when you go to the supermarket, they've got like day old bagels or something. It's like, well, it's cheaper, but you know, yeah, but it's still comforting to people, you know, maybe a day old bagel, but people will still buy it because it's comfort. So that's Cynthia, our day old bagel with a, you know, with a John and Kate plus eight wig.

So she's doing that. And then I think Shamia asked the better question. She's like, so you've been in the industry. How long? And Drew's like, well, because Lord knows no one needs to hear that answer because it's going to be crazy, you know? And she's, she's like, well, why Dennis? So if you know the industry so well, why would you be with Dennis? And she's like, well, you know, Porsche and I, we talked about it. And Porsche was like, no, she's like, no, we did. She's like, no.

She's like, I mean, I was talking to Dennis about something about Pilar last minute, and he was like, oh, you can come to Drew's birthday party. But I had just, like, wiped off my face, so I didn't go. And then the next day, you posted a picture, and we see this, like, picture of Drew not looking amazing, looking kind of like she... You know when people say you look like you just saw a ghost? She looked like she saw, like...

like an army of ghosts. She was like very like, oh my God. So, uh, you know, Portia's like, you know, just like you weren't looking like yourself. You just look very washed, like washed out. Everyone's like, oh my God, not washed out. No, she didn't even say washed out. She said washed. I died. She's like, she's like, ah, washed.

And they're like, yeah. And they're like, why are you saying that? Why are you saying that she looks washed? Drew goes, well, you know, she's right, everybody. I didn't have any makeup on. And then they show a picture of Drew looking washed. And she has so much makeup on. I don't know what she's fucking talking about. But it's true. So it's a lie. And she's like, well, I said washed. Okay. So anyway. And Britt's like, well, I don't know about that.

I don't know about anybody else, but I look good with no makeup. Britt, whatever they did to your nose, sue them. At least get some straws put in there. I mean, that girl has a roadblock in her nose. What did she do? I don't know, but if she has a roadblock in there, I hope she got it insured from her own company. So then, of course, she's like, no, no, no. Your nose insurance. And your nose looks great, but you cannot speak. I cannot listen to Britt talking. It's not even a cute name. Because, you know, I'm a fan of a...

nasal voice. And my favorite voice on Bravo is that really? But what do we do? Like, I love that kind of a voice, but she's not even that it's just like they hacked off part of her nose and now she just sounds like that. And it's just operator. It gets a part of my brain. It hurts a part of my brain. She's doing Lily Tomlin, you know, as the operator. So Portia's like, no, no, I wasn't being mean. It was just a stress, you know, like she's like washed from the stress going through divorce and I had

And I understand that because like I've been through divorce. So I understood. I called her up and I brought up Dennis and you were like, and Cynthia's like, so you didn't know they were working together. She's like, I didn't. So I called. She didn't even say anything. Do not say a single thing to me about them working together.

Yeah, and she's like, and listen, I don't even care about that. And Britt's like, it seems like you care. And Portia's like, well, I was just scrolling, and I saw something about somebody in the studio, and I just made something for dinner. Because, you know, I have nothing to do with that. Like, I'm not dealing with that. So then we see headlines. Atlanta streets say Drew and Dennis are smashing. And Portia is hot and bothered. Hot tea. Is Portia's baby daddy sleeping with Drew Sedora?

And then we see a clip from Drew's new song. Oh, I'd love to be in Oscar Mayweather.

So Shamia's like, well, somebody said that you guys came to the club together holding hands and then we see a photo of them in the club. And that's why I wanted to ask you myself. And Drew's like, um, can I talk? Can I talk? Cause I, can I just put this to bed? Can I just put this dog in the bun? Okay. Cause it's very simple.

I had reached out to you many times, Portia, and you can tell that they all know Drew's lying at this point because she's doing her I'm speaking rationally voice, which is also another tell. She both squeals and then she comes down from the school to be like, I have a very clean voice.

for why this crazy situation happened. - Yeah, and Portia's like, "You didn't contact me. You sent me texts, honey." - Well, that is contacting you. This is 2025. Ain't nobody got time to call, okay? That is contacting you. So she's like, "That's a text." And then Britt goes, "That's not something you text."

Oh, okay. Thank you. Let me connect you over the phone. If your texts are not going through, then please let me help you with the AT&T wireless network. So Drew's like, oh, no, that wasn't something I was going to text. So let me just tell you from the beginning.

It all started when I was opening for Superstar Tamar Braxton. Oh, yeah. I'm not doubting that. I love that she wedges this in here. Guys, when I was opening up from Tamar Braxton, winner of Celebrity Big Brother and sister of the Braxton who has bigger singles on the radio. Tamar. I suck. Um.

And Dennis reached out to my management. So my hairdresser put down that wig he was about to clip into my hair and he said, hello, Drew's management. How can I help you? And he wanted to do the official after party. So, you know, I said, Tamar, how do you feel about hot dogs?

And she said, unbreak my dinner plans. And so I said... Unbreak my buns. Slip a hot dog in. Squeeze some radish. Good or no? About hot dog and some mustard and ketchup. Unbreak these trusadora lies. So she is like...

I was just, I was ready. Honestly, I was ready to just keep singing that song because it's such a fun song to sing. Why didn't you? It's a duet. I passed it over. I passed you the baton. You know what? It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crapin's commercial.

Looking for the ultimate night out? Experience the action from a luxury suite at Capital One Arena. Watch Ovechkin chase history as the Capitals hit the ice or catch the Wizards take on the NBA's best. Rock out with Disturbed, vibe with Mary J. Plage, or dance the night away with Kylie Minogue. Premium seating, VIP service, and unforgettable moments all under one roof. Book your suite now at CapitalOneArena.com slash Premier. Capital One Arena. Watch in style. Live in the moment.

Today, the beverage aisle looks a lot different than it used to. America's beverage companies are working together. We're delivering the options everyone wants. In fact, nearly 60% of beverages Americans buy have zero sugar. You'll find more variety than ever, including more of your favorites, now available with zero sugar. You'll also find more sizes and clear calorie information on the front of every can, bottle, and pack.

We know when it comes to finding balance, the more choices, the better. You know, it was one of those things where I became, since you mentioned baton, it's time to address them. We have to. That pinged me too. I was like, who cares why I didn't finish the song? We need to address this because we are podcasters and this needs to be addressed.

Last week, Ronnie brought to my attention the story of the track runner who bopped someone on the head with her baton. And we complained, like, why doesn't she have a nickname? And so I called her, I think, Batonerella or something like that. And I think we just sort of settled on that.

And it was just a total nadir of our creativity because it was sitting right there. Someone actually had to message us and say, what about Batania Harding? It's all right there. And I don't know how we, yeah. How do we miss that? I was so disappointed in us. We actually had to have a meeting about it. We actually, we actually had like a very serious moment. And this is like, Ben, we need to meet up and talk about how we've just been slacking the fuck off.

Okay. I know we're busy, but there are things that are just slipping through our fingers. We are not the same. Get it together. Like a baton handoff. That didn't go well. You know, this is we next time. Leave no pun unturned. If we are not satisfied with our pun, we are not going to stay. We're not going to stick with baton. We will do it till we get to baton. You're harding. Okay, everyone. Yeah. So thanks for the help, guys.

- Thanks. - So basically she's like, yeah, he reached out to management. He wanted me to do an app. He wanted to do an after party. And then at the after party, he did a whole professional pitch guys about working on my music, you know? And so that's when I told Portia, remember Portia, I told you on the phone, remember? I said, Dennis has been my angel on earth. Dennis has been a crutch to a lady with broken ankles.

Dennis has been the breath to a drowning person. Thank God for Dennis. Yeah, but when you say to Portia, Dennis has been an angel...

Porsche is just going to hear, oh, Dennis donated hot dogs to an after party. So of course it's like, oh yeah, no, he's great. He really helped out your after party. That's not the same as saying, oh, he donated hot dogs to my after party and then I decided I was going to work with him on music, which by the way, does not make sense in real life. Like that is not a leap that happens in real life. You know, it's like, oh, I'm an actor. I'm an actor. I think I want to be a director. That's a leap.

Hey, here's some hot dogs for your after party. I think I would be your music producer now. Not a leap.

So she said, "Well, I'm so excited for you to hear this." And I did ask Dennis, I said, "Portia, Portia, one of the best people in the world, one of my dearest friends of all time, she's not gonna mind, right? You're gonna talk to Portia, right?" And I asked for her, he said that he asked for your blessing and you gave it to him. And she said, "Uh-uh." Portia's just like, "Uh-uh, stop lying. Stop lying to each other about me."

And she's like, nope, Dennis has been like a brother to me since, you know, we all hung out. We all know what happened to Ralph. Poor Ralph. But still, love for him in my heart. And every time I pass that stairwell in the kitchen, all I hear is...

You know, Dennis is so important to us that every now and then I let Ralph out of the basement so he can say hi. It's very special. So Kelly is like, I didn't sleep with him. I just, Portia, I mean, she didn't raise her voice, not one time. And I'm like, say something, say something. Did you sleep with him or not? Tell that girl, like, why, like, why?

Basically, Kelly's like, could you give a straight answer? And the answer is no, it's Drew Sidora. So what you're going to get is stories about how Dennis was an angel and how he advocated for Drew and Ralph, as if that means anything. That actually speaks more to his bad judgment. Like, I would never hire anyone who advocated for Drew and Ralph. Yeah. And then this is so Drew, too. She goes, and then that's when he really nailed the pitch. He looked me deep into my eyes and said,

I need you to record this song. This song right here. Because this song is for me and Portia. And when we were in the studio, he cried. He just started bawling. It was a little hot dog with tears streaming out of it. He said, let's not go out to the movies. Let's not go out and have some fun. So Portia just goes, ah.

Like totally not buying any of it. She said, well, and I have stayed out of whatever you guys have going on. But let me tell you, that man loves you. He loves you so much. He said, I don't want to have a music career with Portia. I want to have a music career with Drew Sidora because she's going places. And I don't want you to ever think for one second that I would ever be dealing with your baby daddy, even though he does advocate for me and Ralph and is producing my music and we go out to the club together. I have had nothing to do with him.

Yeah. And Portia this whole time is just going, oh, that's so nice to hear. Oh, OK. Are you done? And she's like, oh, wow. The posturings, the posturings. So she's like, OK, listen, I don't give a shit about Dennis. Fuck him, marry him, kill him. I don't get throw him in the basement with Ralph. OK, I literally don't care. But I have rooted for you. Do you understand that? I have rooted for your hair.

I made you a hair ambassador for Go Naked. I said, come be an ambassador for Go Naked. The things that I do for other people.

And Drew's like, and we, she goes, I did all of that. And Drew's like, and we did, we did do all that. She goes, and all of that was because I care for you. And my problem with you is this. You are a low down, dirty individual. And you know what I'm talking about. I was like, whoa, what's going on now? Okay. She goes, since, you know what? Since that phone call that you're talking about, you know what?

Like you told me about Dennis and all that and you some, you're some low down shit to me. Very fucking low down. And I'm here to tell you that you got the wrong one. You're fucking with the wrong one. And you know everyone sitting there was like,

Are we missing something? What is happening here? There's some element of the story. I think the whole audience is thinking that, weren't you? Because she even says, you told me about Dennis and all that. So you're saying that she did call you and tell you, but now you're deciding to be mad about it. I didn't get it. She kind of explains it later in a better way where I understand it. So, well, now she says...

is there a producer here? Can I break the fourth wall? And they're like, yeah, go for it. And so Drew's like, well, what did I do? So she's like, okay, we're on a TV show and we have our family and we have friends and we have, we have to support, we have our own support systems and you've been trying to go behind my back to do something dirty by asking Dennis to film with you.

So it's like, whoa. Yeah. Well, Dennis is a low down dirty one here, too, because Dennis went to her and pitched this whole thing so he could stay on the show, even though you're you left us a long time ago and you can kick him off whenever you want to. So I think that was, you know, he at least gets some of the blame for this.

I think that like, I don't know if Portia brings this up, but I think Portia just had to say, how would you feel if I started shooting scenes with Ralph? So she's like, you're just trying to get him like, well, oh, well, you showed me the text message with Drew. So the producer is saying like, is Drew sneaking around? Is this upsetting you because she's actually a friend that you care for? And Portia's like, no, it's not even that deep.

I just got pissed because the bitch was trying to film with my baby daddy on the show. And I don't know how many times I've got to say, don't do that. Yeah. So then, um,

Basically, now they're all like trying to kind of figure out what's going on. Right. So Kenya is saying, I mean, she's a whole married woman. And Portia's like, well, I don't give a shit about what else you got going on. And Britt's like, I mean, I get it. She's married, but that's her baby daddy, too. So we don't really know what's going on so far. So Portia's like, well, look, the second part was that she called production and told them that she was setting up a photo shoot for my company, Go Naked.

So it still sounds like, why are you mad? Because she's setting up a photo shoot for your hair to publicize your hair. Well, because it's like, okay, so, yeah, it was weird. I mean, well, I mean, I understand because it feels a little bit like Breaking Girl code to be like trying to...

Well, you know, I think a lot of things that Real Housewives seem to talk about is like keeping yourself relevant on the show. And so people get mad when like other people are using your tools. Like Dennis is part of Portia's storyline and that's going to keep her relevant. It's like, wait, you don't have anything to keep yourself relevant on this show. So you're going to take my guy to or one of my tools to make yourself relevant. And that's not fair. Although that was the way I interpreted it at this moment. Later on, like you said, Ronnie, she does sort of

explain it a little bit. I think a little bit better, which is basically like, if I have a falling out with Dennis, then he gets to still shoot with you. And then he can air his side of the story and it gets used against me on my own show. And that's, that's, that's bullshit because I'm going to brought him onto the show. She's basically like, I don't want him to turn into Peter Thomas. Right.

Right. When she explained it that way, I kind of got it. She's like, okay, she's basically taking something that can be used as a weapon against me, and she's giving him an opportunity to shit talk me on national TV. By the way, and I would be annoyed if Drew set up a photo shoot for Go Naked. Drew is not the creator of that company. She doesn't get to just authorize photo shoots for a company, even if it is publicity. You can't just do that. Yeah.

You were hired to promote it like under like... Like Porsche has the...

Portia controls the brand. You don't do that, Drew. Yeah. So Britt's like, is this about Dennis or is this about the photo shoot? And Kenya says, well, I think she's mad about Dennis, I think. And she's like, well, if you want to lie, Drew, you can lie. So then Shamia's like, do you guys want to have cake? She's like twerking in the background. She's like, you want cake? So then no one really knows. And Cynthia's like, well, Portia is saying that Drew is lying and Drew does lie. She's lied once or twice.

Well, three times. Drew's lied more times than I've been married. Drew's like, I don't lie. I just really connected with Dennis after he lost 45 pounds in one week on Drop It With Drew. That's it.

My plan just makes people so sexy. He became irresistible. So she's like, I'm taking it back. I'm just confused. I mean, is it Drew? Is it Dennis? Is it to go naked shoot? It's just like, oh my God, she wants to be mad at me. So she's mad at me. So let's go watch Drew. I'm going to start saying things now. Real, real housewives. He like, if you look up upset in the dictionary, you'll see Portia's picture. Yeah.

So then Shamia, they go outside and Shamia is like, "Okay, everyone, it's time for the real turn up." And Shamia basically says that she's had this awful year. You know, her surrogate has breast cancer, Shiloh had complications and everything. And she's decided that this year, last year she didn't get to have any cake, but this year she wants to have cake and she wants to get wet, literally and figuratively. It's like, oh, okay.

I think those would both be literally right. But it's figuratively wet. I'm figuratively wet right now. So they basically, she's like, okay, everyone. I want to get wet in two literal ways.

I want to get abstractly wet. So then she's like, everyone, we're going to jump in the pool because it's going to be wacky. And they all have to jump in the pool in their nice dresses. And I can't imagine anyone was happy about this. Yeah. And then there's also a, there's like a bubble party too. It's like a foam party and a pool party.

It's like a lot of stuff happened outside during this fight. You know, like we went outside. The party was totally different. I felt bad for the girl who is fire dancing with only her fingers because that's a weird fire dance, right? Because normally people are like swinging around big balls on chains with fire or a big fire stick. And this girl just had a couple of little birthday candles on her on her index fingers. And she's like, does this mean I don't get a tip? Fuckers with the fucking wet.

So now we go over to Angela and Charles Oakley and Charles is cooking. Charles, I don't think we ever got an answer to this, but he is like cooking an enormous amount of food. He has like a, like a, a giant pot, like a, like a stock pot full of,

Like a thousand corn cobs. Yeah. But the thing is this, I don't think we ever see anyone come over, right? He's clearly making like a cookout or something, but no one comes over. So it just sort of looks like he's just cooking an enormous meal for three people. A lot of Brussels sprouts. I think that Charles agreed to do this show to make his cooking career happen.

I think he's probably going to be like cooking at home with Charles. And if you want to learn, you know, since this is our grumpy ass husband of the new cast, which I'm grateful for it so far. I hope he's just grumpy and not downright like abusive and evil. You know what I mean? Like emotionally abusive because this is real housewives. You never know. But so far he's just grumpy and I like it. She goes, you want some wine, babe? And he's like, I don't drink white wine. A man shouldn't have sweet wine.

Unless maybe he's overseas or out of the country or something. Cooking with Charles.

Overseas or out of the country. I like this. Like you get like a hall pass for sweet wine in a different country. Like in America, they can't see you. They can't see a week like that. Yeah. You can't tell the gays apart over there. It's fucking Europe or someplace. Fuck that. Yeah. He goes to, he goes to Germany. He's like, I see Spumanti sparkling wine. Yeah.

So we get to meet her daughter, who is Amari. And so they're talking about he's mad that she didn't clean the kitchen. She's like, but I did clean it. And he's like, well, I'm just saying I don't want to come home dirty. You know, it's dirty. If I'm cooking in the kitchen is dirty. You can do that shit in Europe, but it's not going to pass here. Go overseas or out of the country or something.

Maybe you were drunk on that fruity wine you enjoy so much in America. P.S. Don't ask what happened in Luxembourg. Rhymes with easeling. But he's like, but clean this kitchen up. So Angela's just like laughing at his face. And she's like, no, my husband, Charles, he played in the NBA, mainly with the Knicks and the Bulls. And Charles cooks. He cleans. He's like a dream come true unless you want to have happy hour with Pinot Grigio. So.

So no kidding. Unless you don't want to be gay bashed for having a fucking glass of wine. Jesus Christ. I know. Sorry about the diverse, the minor diverse demeanor. So Angela is saying that they have four beautiful children. It's like I identify as beer slash whiskey. Unless it goes to Thailand.

Did you catch up on the White Lotus, by the way? No, I'm saving it because I'm back home in LA now. So I'm just, I tried to get all my Bravo on the plane so that now I can like relax tonight and watch my severance of my White Lotus. Parker Posey is really on one this episode. She like, she just really gets to Parker Posey it up. Like it's not a spoiler. She's just is like in full, like, you know,

she's just going for it and it's it's it's amazing so excited so great so we've talked about angela and charles and they met at a at a party in chicago like 10 years ago or something i don't know a long time ago and then he didn't call her for 10 years but then they happened to become neighbors in the same condo and so then he was like okay and she's like i think

I feel like fate brought us together. Let me tell you what brought you together. Convenience. Okay. My husband too. It's going to be a neighbor or it's going to be somebody who just like comes to sell me something because I'm not making any effort. I'll tell you that it's going to be an Amazon delivery person. As we've talked about before, a task rabbit. Yeah.

She's like, well, at first I was offended when I heard that he was into me because someone told me that he was asking about the hoe down the street. But it turns out he was asking about the HOA. So I got a little confused, but it's all good.

unfortunately brittany started calling him it wouldn't stop for a while so are you interested in a timeshare so we find out that angela's thing is buying houses and remodeling and selling them but she's got five at a time right now which sounds like a crazy workload and we see them and they're huge houses so i'm not really sure that's a lot of funding

It's a lot. But it seems like she's like... I don't know. I've...

Okay. This may be a classic Ben naive moment, but I feel like she seems legit. Right. I don't think she does. Yeah. Like, cause you know, there's some people like Drew Sedora, who's like, we've started a new mortgage company and we've already funded 45,000 homes across the USA. And you're like, um, okay. So you have a pyramid scheme. She's like, I'm literally selling pyramids across America. But, um, I feel like Angela, I feel like she, she just seems like someone who's like on top of her shit, you know?

She does. And I think that if you buy five houses, then you're doing something. You know what I mean? It's not like it's not some pie in the sky thing. Now, we don't know. We haven't seen the houses. I hope she has an episode where she goes through and shows us three models and stuff because, you know, I love that shit.

So I hope we get that. But yeah, I agree with you. So far, she seems real. So she's basically gossiping with her daughter and her husband. Neither one of them care about any of this shit, but she's trying to get them interested in her new job. You know, so she's like, these girls are so messy, you know, and

And Drew's music, you know, she's doing it with Porsche's ex-boyfriend who apparently sells hot dogs. But, you know, I don't think Drew should have done that. But, you know, she has a reason. So I kind of see both sides. I mean, who's going to turn down a hot dog? Am I right? He's like, not any man I know. That's for sure.

Charles is being so ridiculous because she's trying to have her little scene and he just is clanking. He's like washing pants, like, "Pong, pong, clink, clink, plonk." She's like, "Could you please stop doing that during my scene? Could you wait?" He's like, "Sorry, I can't." As he's sitting there with his bandana around his head, like he is working in Benihana. Yeah.

And he's like, I don't want to hear this story. And she's like, well, I'm saying that she's doing work with her ex-boyfriend and that's a problem. And he's like, well, you did work with your ex-boyfriend. And she's like, okay, Charles. And he's like, yeah, well, it was fine then, right? Oh, well, what? It's always some well with some water in it. A man said that. Don't you forget it.

Better not be a well with some white wine in it. That's what I got to say. And he goes, don't let them talk about you. Don't talk about them. Don't be a follower. Be a leader.

She's like, okay. So she says the secret for loving a man like Charles is just letting him be who he is, which is someone who bangs pans, pots and pans around and has strange views on white wine. Just a man who could benefit from a few soul fights. All right. Just a man who walks around the kitchen a lot saying, yes, chef, because you saw season two of The Bear. Congratulations.

So their other kid comes in and he's like, are you Bruce Lee, dad? And he goes, now, why would you say that? And he goes, your stupid bandana. And he's like, oh, you got jokes, huh? I don't have jokes, but your bandana is making me laugh. So now we go to lunch with Portia and Kenya at a place called Divan, which is funny because is this a restaurant named after a type of sofa? Yeah.

Is that a sofa? What's a divan sofa? A divan is like, it's like a, I think it's like a sofa that's sort of where, you know, the back, I could be wrong. I'm going to double check, but I think it's like where the back is like not, it's like you have half of a back, like the first one half, the sofa has a back and it sort of swoops down into like no back. Oh, like a fainting couch kind of thing. Yeah. You know what? It's like the sofas they had at the, at the, at the hotel we had a Wednesday that in Toronto. Yeah.

Oh, I didn't notice. Did you notice the sofa? I was out of it. I'm sorry. Did you notice the divans or a divan? Yeah. It's like, yeah, I guess it's like a fainting couch. I don't know. I think it's like,

I think it's basically like a sofa where like, if, if you sit back on the sofa and the wrong place, you'll fall off of it into the wall. Okay. Yeah. I don't like this. So, um, someone named a restaurant after it. So it was very fancy. Cause if I went to a restaurant, it would be named like Ikea sectional. Yeah.

Oh, Ronnie, I forgot. We have to wrap up this. I have a reservation at Futon later. Oh, my God. I'll be a beanbag chair. Come say hi. It's right down the street. We're going to Devon this weekend.

This new year, why not let Audible expand your life by listening? Explore over 1 million audiobooks, podcasts, and exclusive Audible Originals that'll inspire and motivate you. Tap into your well-being with advice and insight from leading professionals and experts on better health, relationships, career, finance, investing, and more.

Maybe you want to kick a bad habit or start a good one. If you're interested in learning how to master your emotions and hearing scientifically backed advice for using your emotions as a tool, may I suggest Shift by psychologist and bestseller author Dr. Ethan Krause? Trust me, listening on Audible can help you reach the goals you set for yourself. Start listening today when you sign up for a free 30-day trial at audible.com slash wondery. That's audible.com slash wondery.

Thank you to our partner, Mentos Gum.

You ever feel like you're just going through the same motions day after day? We've all been there. Staring at brake lights in traffic or a stuck-in-along meeting? Not anymore with Mentos gum. Listen up. This isn't just your regular gum. We're talking about a whole vibe refresh. Think of it as your personal reset button. One piece, and suddenly that traffic jam becomes your private concert venue. That meeting that should have been an email? It turns into a full-on fiesta.

From flavors like fresh mint to bold strawberry, Mentos Gum transforms ordinary moments into fresh possibilities. Whether you want to switch up your route home or keep your mind fresh in a meeting, refresh the everyday with Mentos Gum. Yes to fresh with Mentos Gum.

So Portia comes in her Rolls Royce and it says Mandarin seats gifted by Simon in 2022. And then it says Kenya's is her Rolls Royce that she bought herself. So it's like the competing Rolls Royces. Whose is more valid?

Those are some big ass cars. I know they're very expensive and everybody's like, oh my God, I'm so fancy. My Rolls Royce. Here's what I think. Don't fucking park next to me in the Whole Foods or the, you know, the Ralph's or whatever, because I will purposely ding your car with my car door because you're taking up two spaces and that's not cool. No one needs to be driving that bus. Get that shit out of my way. You know, get like a Hyundai Elantra. Okay. It'll do just what you need. Okay. Get a Kia. Okay. I wouldn't go that far.

I'm not anti nice car in general. It's just like, does every car have to, you know, remind me about your penis? No. Get a Mazda. You know, I just don't know. You don't need these giant ass cars that look like enormous sneakers, right? Just get something that like fits in the parking spot and gets you from where you need to be. And it's not going to put you into debt because that's what's going to happen to both these women.

Well, those are expensive cars. Oh, my gosh. Okay, so Porsche, they talk about how they've had a love-hate relationship. And, you know, we've done this for years with these two. Right now, they're friends. And we see their fights, their best of fights. And now I'd like to introduce Miss America 1993. She's like, uh, Miss USA, I'm sorry. Bye, Ashy. Bye.

That was the origin for their entire feud was that Miss America comment. I mean, for like 10 years. But now they have 10 glorious years. But now they have to be friends, mainly because it's like death becomes her where they realize, oh, we've been at each other's throats, but we need each other. Because if we like one wrong move and these new girls are going to replace us.

So now they're just like, they're friends now under the guise of that they both have daughters. So that gives them perspective. I'm like,

since when does having children mean that that adults can't fight have you not watched any of the other real housewives well especially this we've already seen it on this show remember the first year they both had kids they're like oh my god look at us we both have kids and kenya came to pilar's you know what was it baby shower not baby shower but like first birthday party it was a princess party and they were like oh my god we're gonna be best friends and like two weeks later they're like die i hope you die yeah

So... And they're basically like, God, we're just too old to fight at this point. I'm like, again...

many other housewives shows, Tamara and Shannon. There's a lot of evidence against that theory. So, um, Kenya, this Porsche has a cold and she's, Ken is like, you have a cold. She's like, yeah, when you left the party, she made us jump in the pool, um, which is probably not where her cold came from. But I feel like this is a little Easter egg to a future feud between her and Shamia. You made me jump in bubble water. I got sick. Um,

so um kenya's like yeah i remember drew a couple of days before and she mentioned dennis in the music and i said dennis in the music and porsche was like well he did do um a kid's out he did do a kid's album for my daughter and then we see the cover art for this album and it's called all star kids and you know written in crayon now this i believe this is a resume this doesn't make it better this doesn't make it better though drew sidora's like well

Clive Davis rejected me, so I've decided to go to an off-brand Kidz Bop producer who couldn't even do Kidz Bop. I mean, this guy doesn't even have as many credentials as whoever it was that made the songs for Danielle Cabral on New Jersey last season. Yeah, it's pretty bad.

So I like that Portia's trying to stick up for him, too. She's like, well, he has a children's album. So, I mean, it's not like he's nobody. Okay. So Drew's she's like, look, Drew makes shit up in her mind. And I don't know what she's about to say or do, but I root for her and I just go with it. But then finding out that you're trying to film with him on here without telling me, that's not cool.

Yeah. And she says that Dennis, she's like, Dennis is my co-parent and we have a great relationship. And when it's good, it's good. And like, when is Dennis the menace, you know, and petty pee, it's bad. And we see flashback from the spinoff with Portia and Dennis yelling at each other while his mom is watching or participating. And Portia's like, I don't want him to film anything that's going to compromise the growth that we have had. I don't think it's about compromising the growth. It's that again, she just doesn't want him to have a chance to,

to talk shit about her with Drew. Yeah. And Kenya says, yeah, I think he's just trying to have his cake and eat it too, which is a bad thing to say with Dennis because Dennis is always going to have the cake and eat its cake. The man knows how to enjoy cake. You know, I don't really like that. I want to have my cake and eat it too, too. I want to have it, swallow it.

I always liquefy it and rub it all over me. I'll have cake any way I can. You know, I don't want to be judged about it. So for this, I stand up for the hot dog guy. I have to say, I've never liked that expression just because I think it's confusing. Don't you feel like by eating the cake, you're having the cake?

And I understand it's supposed to be that having the cake means that the cake is on your plate. But then when you eat it, you don't have it anymore. But I kind of feel like when you eat it, you've had it. So I think it means like it's since it means the same thing. You're trying to you're trying to have it twice. Like you're trying to have it both ways. You're trying to have both questions because when you have your cake, you have your cake. And when you eat your cake, you eat your cake. And it's like, well, you can't have it. Like, you don't need to have it both ways. You already had it one way. You greedy fuck.

Well, according to Wikipedia, the proverb literally means they say that's the direct quote. The proverb literally means you cannot simultaneously retain possession of a cake and eat it, too, because once the cake is eaten, it is gone. I'm like, no, it's in my stomach. I think it should be you can't see your cake and eat it, too.

does that make me wrong i still don't understand it you see that's the thing about that i like your i like your i like your interpretation of it i don't know if you're the traditional and orthodox way of using it but i think it's a nice way of using that phrase i think it could work and guess what you know why it could work because we can see our cake and eat it too we can have it both ways yeah

So, of course, she's like, well, our family right now is very, very vulnerable. Okay. And so Drew should be trying to protect her the way I've protected her.

Did you not mention go naked hair? I go, okay. So Kenya says, yeah, you know, well, I see you spinning around the block with that little Rolls Royce that your estranged husband took from you. I'm like, wait a minute. How do you have that car? And she's like, oh, you saw his post. And she's like, what do you mean? I saw his post. He does like 50 posts a day. Instagram is only him doing posts about what a shithead you are. Yeah.

Yeah, and we see all these things where he posts these stories like, Question, is it appropriate to exchange expensive gifts with an ex while legally married to someone else? Hashtag inquiring minds want to know. Here we go again with Underground Railroad cornering herself with why an experienced car enthusiast at 14 years made a strategic business decision to conduct multi-million dollar car rents. Stay in the Mercedes-Benz. I bought your name. Okay, he needs a social media manager. That's just not good shade. Those are not good shady stories. But it's a good hashtag. He just needs to tighten it up.

Because he says, hashtag ignorance is a decease. And his last one question, would you rather cry homeless in a Rolls Royce or in a Honda Civic? That's actually a pretty good, that's actually an interesting question. I have to say, I take it all back. What would you rather cry homeless in? Isn't that a question for Bethany? Oh my God, I'm homeless. I'm homeless. I'm homeless. Because I feel like if you're in a Rolls Royce crying homeless, people would just be like, just sell your Rolls Royce. You can literally buy a house.

Or live in the rolls. They're big enough. Just double park, homelessly, in your rolls. So Kenya's like, "How did we ever get to this place?" And it's so weird seeing Kenya as just a backup, like, supporting character. I don't know if it works, I think. I think it actually works because she doesn't, she hasn't had anything to offer seriously in a few years.

And so having her as just someone who can kind of like be there and then be shady when she needs to be, I think it works. And for some of these pros, these pro villains, you know, like I think Vicki Gunvalson was also, is also pretty good as a plug and play friend of who can just be mean when you need her to be mean. Uh, we don't need to have a whole story about what's going on in their lives. So I think this does work with Kenya, you know, it's not going down quietly. That's for sure. She's been tweeting. Um, Oh really? I'm the one put on pause. Well, look, I'm the only one trending from this show. Hey,

It's funny. Kenya not going down quietly. That's exactly what she said about Brit, I think. Sorry, it took me a minute. Think about it. Think about it. My name is Gina, and I want to say, think about it.

so kenya is asking her so how did we get to this place porsche you and simon everyone thought it would last forever and porsche's like well i didn't know he was lying about certain things you know because we were on a jet and then we got surrounded and there was police every place and fbi and homeland security and terrorists it was crazy literally everybody was teaming up against him huge and i was like what's going on here and then he said well

Well, one time I was in this car. I didn't know the car was stolen. And, you know, you can't do that when you have a green card because they get real mad if you do anything with the green card. And Kenny's like, oh, yeah, that's true. That's true. I mean, let me tell you, the amount of people that I've known sitting in a stolen car with a green card. Trust me, I know we're good. You're right. So I would better watch out these days.

So Kenya is like, it's so true. And so Portia's like, well, so when the judgment got released into the press about him being married, you know, some scamming in the past, some credit card fraud, being deported and this and that, I literally was like, wait, what? What's all this? I would be just like,

I'm leaving you. I mean, she did. But it's just funny, like, you know, when it came out that he was a complete fraudster and a con artist and scamming people and we'd already been surrounded by police officers. I was like, huh, that's weird. It's just so understated on her. I'm like, oh, you know, we were on a jet and then we got surrounded by, you know, every agency, every letter agency in existence. But he explained it away, you know, and I got it, you know.

Homeland Security is totally here about the sitting there in a stolen car thing from like 20 years ago, I'm sure. It's no big deal. I would really like an explanation from Bravo why they did not have cameras running. They just should have had them there even if they didn't have a show ready yet. Just keep the cameras on Portia at all times. Yes. So Kenny's like, uh-huh. So you were his fourth wife? And Portia, you see Portia try to decide what she's going to say here. And then she's like, fuck it, I'll just say it. She goes...

Fifth. Fifth, actually. Kenny's like, fifth? Yeah, because there was another marriage and that was fake. So, yeah. So I filed for divorce and then I'm at my mom's house and then my phone beeps and one of the cameras is still on in the living room and he's got women in the house. Can you believe it? A man who was already in trouble for sitting in a stolen car 20 years ago.

I can't believe this person who I found out was a complete faker and has scams left and right actually had girls over at the house the first night I was out of there. I can't believe it. Yeah. So then she tells us her love story. She's like, you know, when I really knew Simon was my person was because I wrote a book about being treated badly by men. And he said, I read that book and I'll protect you. Portia, nobody read that book.

People may have bought it, but nobody read that book. - No one read it. - Sorry, they just didn't. - I didn't even know she had that book, did you? - You know, not really. Maybe I knew it at one point, but it's like, Portia's single, Portia's book. I feel like a lot of her creative endeavors sort of get forgotten about. - I love Portia. Now listen, I'll buy some Go Naked hair. Maybe I'll show up to Atlanta in some Go Naked clips. - Is that what Go Naked is? It's that you, their clips?

Yeah. Why is it called Go Naked? Well, my head is naked and she sells hair, so I figure it should... Go Naked by putting something on. I think there's a branding issue. Did Drew Sedora come up with the name? It can't be that. Not a terrible point, actually. So she's like, I just wanted a man, a man who was honest, a man who left his wife for me, basically, after I flirted with him at a pool. Portia!

I can't feel sorry for Portia. I'm sorry. And also Portia has a way of telling stories like Drew Sidora tells stories where she's just leaving chunks of information out. Like we don't all have the Instagram Portia. Come on now. And even Kenya is Kenya's like, listen, I need someone to shoot with. So I'm going to be nice to you this season. Kenya is just looking like she wants to rip into this and she's not letting her. She really does. She really does.

Hello there. This is a two-part recap, okay? This is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two. Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice and King. Our way is the Amber way.

It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp. Catherine DiBernardo has our heart-o. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. Dana C. Dana Do. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. It's her.

We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Erin McNicholas. She don't miss no trickleless. Jamie. She has no less namey. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Hava Nagila Webber.

We could all learn from Jennifer Kearns. She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trach. Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Mannock's door. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock. Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey Bee. Rigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay Dee. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox.

Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg. This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian. I love-a-ya Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson. She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes, we can-a, it's Savannah. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. The Bay Area Betches.

And our super premium sponsors. She's the VIP, it's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. She's got a leg up, it's Beth Ani. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neil. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. It's our queen, it's Queen La Ifa.

Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Know your worth with Jason Kerr. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony, Junie. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo. She gets an A, it's Kelly B.

We love him madly. It's Kyle Pod Shadley. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron. She's a whiz. It's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it. It's Lola Alcalani. The incredible, edible Matthew Sisters. She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rhodes.

Give him hell, Miss Noelle. She's the Queen Bee. It's Sarah Lemke. Shannon out of a can and Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plain. She ain't no shrinking Violet Kutar. We love you guys.

If you like Watch What Crappens, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey. Have you ever wondered how a circus performer could become the most powerful woman in the Byzantine Empire? Even the Royals is a podcast from Wondery that pulls back the curtain on royal families, from ancient empires to modern monarchs, to

to show you the darker side of what it means to be royalty. Before she ruled an empire, Theodora was a teen sensation in circus shows featuring dancing bears, burlesque performers, and blood-soaked chariot races. But when her star came crashing down, she clawed her way from rock bottom to the very top, using everything from comedy to espionage to get there.

Empress Theodora didn't just survive. She revolutionized women's rights across the Byzantine Empire, like changing laws to let women divorce men, own property, and bring abusive men to justice. For all her work in pioneering, she's remembered as the most powerful Byzantine empress in history. Follow Even the Royals on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Even the Royals early and ad-free by joining Wondery Plus.