Shownotes Transcript
Don't miss Good American Family. We have a little girl here for adoption. She has dwarfism. Starring Ellen Pompeo and Mark Duplass. Something is off. She's just a little girl. You think she's faking it? She has adult teeth? There are signs of puberty? Inspired by the shocking stories that tore a family apart. I don't know what's going on. How old are you? You should get a lawyer. You have no idea how those people hurt this girl. Don't miss Good American Family.
The Hulu Original Series. Good American Family. New episodes Wednesdays. Streaming on Hulu. One of the reasons we love watching Bravo shows is for the luxury. I mean, come on, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Most of the time I can just watch it for the shots of the gorgeous city and the houses. And let's not forget Lisa Barlow's $60,000 ring that she lost. Oh, heck yeah.
If you're looking for a way to experience luxury for yourself, try Virgin Voyages. Over $1,000 in value is included in every sailing. Everything they offer, from their menus created by Michelin star chefs to their cabins designed by top international firms, is the pinnacle of luxury.
of luxury. Virgin Voyages cruises are kid-free and catered to adult tastes, and they have some incredible destinations. We're talking Caribbean escapes, Iceland and the British Isles, Miami, New York. You can even live out your below-deck med fantasy with our Lux Voyage in the Med.
I am so excited to go on my first Virgin cruise. You know, the idea of a kid-free ship is very appealing to me. And all these menus, it's like definitely a boat made for Ben. It looks like a giant, gorgeous club with fabulous rooms. I cannot wait to go. Book now at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor. I just love Wayfair. Can I just say that? I love Wayfair and I have been reading
redoing my podcast space in here to become more of like a video podcast studio. And I've been using Wayfair to get, I got some beautiful chairs that I'm using right now for on camera that are great. And honestly, we're going to spread the joy to other rooms in the house because I think I'm going to get some new chairs for my dining room and I'm going to use Wayfair to get the chairs. Yeah, it really works for every room. I even did a patio. I did my whole patio on Wayfair stuff and it looks amazing.
Fantastic. Yeah, they just have so much cool stuff. They've got like, you know, furniture and decor. They've got cozy couches and side tables and artwork and all sorts of cool stuff. But they also have like storage and organization and kitchen essentials. They really have everything. Yeah, it's super convenient because they really do have everything. All different kinds of designers, all different kinds of styles.
the huge selection made it easier for me to just shop for everything from there. I really got a lot of stuff from Wayfair. I'm constantly surprised by the things that I can actually find in there too. They just have such a wide and deep catalog of things. It's perfect for everything that I need. Head over to Wayfair.com and find something that's just your style today. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair, every style, every home.
Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap,,
Hi, everyone. Welcome back. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. So that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that. Let's get right back into the episode. So then they all start to gather around. They're doing some more shopping and stuff. I like this line, though. She goes, I just want to be a Barbie tonight, okay? Just pretend that I don't have an IQ of 140. Okay. Mm-hmm.
I'd be dumb enough to hang out with you idiots. Then Kyle goes up to Boze and she's like, are you okay? She's like, I cannot with that situation. She can't hear any form of criticism, says Kyle Richards. Well, so what does she want to do? Does she just want to pretend like nothing happened? That's going to be very awkward, isn't it? If we all are just sitting around pretending nothing is the matter, how are we supposed to have fun with that? I mean, the only thing that could be more awkward would be if we all put on enormous wings and had to sit around a tiny table together.
Yeah, Boze is still doing that thing like, "What? How can women hang out together and not get along?" Okay. So then, now they all start to sit at the table, and Kathy asks for bags of ice to put under her armpits, because she's so hot. And Dorit's like, "Well, you know Sutton's mind goes to 'We're colluding!' Because that's her type of behavior. That's the kind of shit she would do."
Yeah, that's a good one. So then Sun's like avoiding going to the table. So she's like loitering at a vendor and the vendor's like, here's some sexy oil for the bedroom. I think I'm good. I don't want to put a lot of oil on me. You know what?
I just realized, I think I'd rather sit at a table with these women than be talking to all these poor people selling trinkets. So goodbye, sir. I know. I love Todd and Archie West. Sexy oil for the bedroom. Does it make a bed? Then get it the fuck out of my face, poor person. Have some respect. So Kathy gets her ice and then they're all sitting there and they're like talking. It's like, it gets like quiet at the table. It's awkward, you know? They're all staring at Sutton. Like, is she going to do something? Is she going to do something? So she's like, well,
Place cards are the best thing that can ever happen, because then my options are not to sit across from someone who thinks I kick women when they're down, or next to someone that obviously does not like me. So they change seats, so that Sutton doesn't have to be in awkward seating. So that's how it's starting, where Sutton needs the seats changed. So Kathy's like, oh, wow, look, Barbie's here, everybody. I got Barbie to smile. How's your vagina working, Barbie? Hmm.
And then a cute waiter comes to take their orders. And then Kyle's like, oh my God, Garcelle, you're like, hi, what can I order? Your eyes were like. So they're like laughing at Garcelle. And Garcelle's like, look, my dating life is, I'm not on the apps. If I meet someone through a friend or at Whole Foods or outside my house in Oxnard, which I don't know if you know this, I built a house in Oxnard. You know, I'm open. If he's cute enough, I may have a little fun. But if he's not cute, I'll just have to say no.
Yeah, I'm on the apps. I'm on Instacart because they show a picture of your shopper and I'm on TaskRabbit and I'm on DoorDash and I'm on Uber, of course, you know, so I'm just hoping that it's kind of, you know, you just kind of hope. Yeah, you never know. One of these days it'll work out. Keep on dreaming. So then I'm just looking for a man to say,
The brownies aren't here. So instead, I'm going to get you some Little Debbie's instead of the brownies aren't here. So I'm refunding that part of your order and just pretending the brownies aren't a necessity. Yeah. You know, that's not my soulmate. You need someone who knows who knows that shop for you. So Kathy excuses herself to go to the bathroom. And then it's just more awkward silence. And then Kathy comes back and now she's in like a little dress. She goes, everyone, I have a little secret.
I tinkled in my shorts. They're like, what? Yeah, I tinkled. Tinkled in the shorts. God damn it. Sit your ass down. Oh, my God. So now they start doing impersonations of each other. Kyle does a pretty good Jennifer Tilly. And Garcelle does a good...
And Carl's good at imitations in general, by the way. She should lean into that more because that's her most enduring side is when she does imitations. Yeah, she does good ones. So she did a good one of Jennifer Tilly and then Garcelle does one of Erica. Hers is just really deep. She's like, Tom's car went over a hill. It snows in Pasadena. I'm going to come for you, bitch.
And then Jennifer Tilly starts doing "Son." She starts going, "No, ma'am. No, ma'am. No, ma'am." And Dorit's like, "Ooh, I spent another long time thinking about this." She's trying to do her Southern accent overlaid over her pan-European accent that she has.
And it's both Erica and Dorit just going with their Southern accents at her. And it doesn't really work as well when you don't like the person, you know what I mean? It makes it less good natured. So Sutton gets mad and, you know, she looks like an idiot again, because you can't even take it in good fun, you know? So instead she's like, "Nobody talks like me, so cock, nobody talks like me."
And then Kyle's like, Sutton is like really bringing such a negative energy to this. It's like, it's like Dorit and Erica's birthday. Like hopefully we can ignore Sutton in the corner and just enjoy ourselves. But like, once again, Sutton wants to be, make this all about her. I'm like, well, because they're mocking her. Yeah.
Yeah, but she can still lighten up, Sutton. Oh my God. All she had to be was like, "Oh, that's hilarious, girls." But instead she's like, "What a terrible accent!" So then Sutton could always lighten up. Let's be honest. It's not just at this table. But then we wouldn't have the Sutton that we know and love. Yeah. So then they sing "Happy Birthday" and they're like, "We hopes you get some tonight. We hope you get some tonight. We hope you get lovely presents. Hope you get some tonight." Like, oh my God, that is hilarious. That is hilarious.
So then they get some cake and they find out it's yellow cake. And Sutton's like, I don't want a piece of yellow cake. Sutton, you're going to lose me now. And so, but she's, she just doesn't want the cake because she's protesting. She like doesn't want to contribute to the celebration of these two women that she hates.
So Bo's the same that there'll be some activities tomorrow, et cetera. And they all pretty much just get up and go. And Sutton's like, I did the boat. I showed up for the dinner. I got made fun of. I've had enough. They just like to kick me down or up. I'm being kicked by these women. That's fucking bullshit. Which is funny because she's basically taking Erica's criticism of Sutton and now applying it to them. She's like, they are kicking me when I'm down. Yeah. So now...
People are back in their rooms getting ready for the next day. We see Jennifer Tilly and Garcelle preparing. You know, it's like, let's get clothes on. Oh, my God.
So then Jennifer Tilly's like, look at my ring. Scarper Ellie looks like a jellyfish, doesn't it? It was $9 million. It's my vacation jewelry. I know. Like, well, you better not lose it. She's like, oh, this thing, this is a cheapo. So then over Kathy and Kyle's villa, Kathy is, you know, she greets the resort staff as they bring in breakfast and everything. And then,
We see Boze and Sutton, they arrive at it. They go to a chocolatier because this is going to be an attempt to bond a little bit. Because Boze is saying how Sutton always thinks that there's always distance between them. And she's like, I do believe that Sutton has made a narrative in her head that I am Team Dorit and nobody else. When the truth is, I'm Team Dorit and...
And now a little bit Tim Kyle, but mainly Dorit. So she's a little bit incorrect there. So to prove her wrong, I'm going to have a chocolate making scene where I take everything that she says and take it to Dorit.
So see how this works. Yeah, precisely. So then we go to Jennifer Tilly and she's like, oh, wow. Did you guys order some food? I mean, we've got sunscreen. Wow. This is living and having such a great life. I've gotten to a place in my life where everything is fabulous. And Kyle's just like, I hate you. Apparently somebody doesn't have a chair to move from the living room to the dining room.
I know. She's like, oh, are you our waiter guy? Okay, I hear piña coladas are good for the heat. So can we have some piña coladas and also the pulled pork sliders and some fish tacos, please? And Kyle is like horrified that anyone ordered this amount of food on this show. So Garcelle's like, well, Kyle, have you posted your thirst trap yet from Oregon? There, I said it. She's like, no, no, I'm not feeling that thirsty right now.
Well, my first trap is heading to 100,000 likes, and I really figured out what Instagram likes. Nipples! So we see that photo, and Kyle's like, well, last night was really interesting. And Garcelle's like, well, should we start off in the sweet? She's like, well, first of all, we're all the closest to Sutton, and we love her so much. Guys, don't we love her? God.
I have to say, I love Sutton so much. So now everything I say going forward comes from a place of love automatically. Okay. But like, I need you guys to be open-minded that she's a fucking bitch and she's awful and she's like really needy and she's stupid and no one likes her. But I love her so much. Yeah. So Garcelle's like, well, you know, look, this sounds weird, but in Sutton's story, you're the hero. Why?
I don't know. I've been on your show for five years and I still can't figure it out. She's like, but I mean, like none of us said anything. Like why am I being singled out here? Like my God. She's like, well, I think when you don't do it, it hurts more. But why?
I don't know. It's a question for Sutton. It literally makes no sense. I mean, look, Jennifer is an Oscar nominee, which is pretty, pretty cool. And she's also incredibly wealthy and I'm famous in my own right. And still that's not enough for Sutton. So we don't get it. And honestly, at this point, we don't care. Yeah. And she's like, so Kyle, I wanted to check in with you also, you know, we're talking about Bo's calling you and seeing Mo. Does that make you want to do something like, I don't know, like a vagina? Yeah.
Well, I don't see the benefit of rushing to get a divorce, at least not before the knot decides to run a cover story on us again. And Garcelle's like, well...
you're not even rushing to get any information at all? Like, what's, what information? And like, where do I start? Like, all that stuff. And Jennifer's like, okay, well, I'm going to tell a story that's going to make you feel really poor. Okay, so I have had lots of friends who've been married to lots of wealthy men, Sutton included, and they're like, oh, been the nicest people in the world. And then all of a sudden, the lawyers come in and they do this and that. And my ex, who I loved very much, much the day he died. And like,
When we got divorced, we had $700,000 in the bank and he's like, I'm going to give you $250,000. And then someone said to me, Jennifer, I think you need to get a divorce lawyer. Well, did you end up getting more money than the $350,000? I got a piece of the Simpsons. I mean, come on, I'm not buying diamonds on jockey money. The jockey money just pays for my snot.
so brilliant it's so amazing you know some people are like well now that garcelle's leaving make jennifer full time but and then i saw someone else on twitter say don't make her full time because jennifer's position is friend of as someone who's outside and comes in and makes commentary and then drops moments like this is perfect and i fully agree i don't want jennifer i don't want a situation where jennifer
We may have to comment about Jennifer's life being boring, or I don't want to have to be in a situation where people are ganging up on Jennifer. She has a bad season. I love Jennifer as she is, and I just want to preserve her in this state. Yeah. Well, I don't think she's ever going to have...
I don't think she's going to get away with people not turning on her. I mean, that's just housewives role. You know, she'll do, there'll be something where she'll say something where people like, Oh my God, I can't believe I ever liked her for at least six months, you know, that's true. But, um, and also, you know, she's too popular for Kyle and the group not to turn on her. So,
Yeah, they'll be trying it with her. And we see them trying, we see them testing the waters in this very episode and it doesn't really work, but we'll see. So now Dorit and Erica are having breakfast and Erica's like, wait a minute, is that a waffle? She goes, no, definitely not. Okay.
And she said that literally in your accent, your Dorit accent. She was literally like, definitely not. I was like, wow, she's been listening. So Kathy is just putting creams and potions all over herself and trying to get the mirror to talk back to her as she does. So we go back to the chocolatier and they're learning how to make all of these little chocolates. And then we get to the discussion. So Buzz is like, so what are your thoughts?
And it's like, well, you know, I love that Jackie Kennedy answer. If I told you my thoughts, it wouldn't be my thoughts anymore. What it? She goes, oh, wow. What a bitch. Jackie Kennedy was not joking around, huh?
Well, you know what? I heard what those women said. Oh, with no agreement or disagreement? You just heard? We've had a lot of discussions. You know, Eric and I have been really getting along, and she showed no animosity to me, and it seemed to come out of nowhere. Oh, really? Because she said it to me before. And then we see flashbacks. She's been talking about you this whole season. Yeah, she's been talking shit about you behind your back. Let me see footage of that.
you know flashbacks etc so boze is like so i thought it was actually maybe good that she said it out loud oh well that's great i'm i'm glad she could get it out i thought about what she said and i also thought erica herself was down and and uh in in and to read and kyle did the same thing that i did and asked questions the exact same thing and their husbands even made fun of erica and then we see flashbacks that scene where mauricio and mo are making fun of erica
Yeah. That there was no repercussions. It's like there is a strange double standard or triple standard with these women, you know, and both didn't understand our history. So I need to explain it. And so Sutton's like, I've apologized and I'm not doing it again. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.
Finding a therapist you trust shouldn't be so complicated or cost you a fortune. That's why today's sponsor, Rula, was formed. Rula connects you with high-quality vetted licensed mental health professionals that are suited for you. And here's the best part. They take most major insurance plans.
That means instead of paying hundreds out of pocket, you could pay as little as $15 per session. Rula also supports you every step of the way from finding a therapist to scheduling your sessions to tracking your progress and dealing with insurance. They make it happen. I can't tell you how much therapy has helped me. It is at its lightest. It's kind of like a nice mental scrub at its best.
most heaviest I am like working through issues and I feel like it's really helped me grow as a person and get through the day's challenges. Thousands have already trusted Rula to support them on their journey towards improved mental health and overall well-being. Head over to rula.com slash crappins to get started today. After you sign up, they ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you.
Go to rula.com slash crappins and take the first step towards better mental health today. You deserve quality care from someone who cares.
Looking for a weight loss solution that actually works? Weight Loss by HERS provides access to GLP-1 medications with personalized care to help you hit your goals. HERS is transforming women's health care by providing access to affordable weight loss treatment plans delivered straight to your door if prescribed. After submitting an online intake form, a licensed medical provider will determine what plan is best for you. If prescribed, your program includes medication, ongoing care, and online support.
All at one low cost. Weight loss plans are more affordable through hers with compounded GLP-1 injections starting at $1.65 per month with a 12-month plan paid up front for new subscribers. No hidden fees and no membership fees. Start your initial free online visit today at forhers.com slash crappins.
That's F-O-R-H-E-R-S dot com slash crappins for your personalized weight loss treatment options. For hers dot com slash crappins. Hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required. Restrictions apply. Wigovi and Azempic are not compounded. Actual price depends on product and plan purchased.
The days are getting longer. The sun is out more. I just went up to my garden box and she is blooming and it made me realize spring produce is now here and I am so excited for cooking with fava beans and fresh herbs.
Whole Foods Market has what you're looking for with great everyday prices. At Whole Foods Market, you can save every day. Look for the yellow low-price signs that help you save money without compromising the quality you expect from Whole Foods. Find responsibly farmed Atlantic salmon, no antibiotics ever, ground beef, and boneless, skinless chicken breasts. Plus, more throughout the store. Yellow really means savings at Whole Foods Market because their sale signs are also yellow. So basically, whenever you see yellow, you know you're saving money.
I use Whole Foods all the time for little parties that I have to get, you know, charcuterie plates put together. They have the best ingredients. I just love this place. Save on the best of spring with great everyday prices at Whole Foods Market.
We've both been on a decorating journey lately, so we're just like really happy to have found our sponsor, Revival Rugs. Revival's founders didn't want to spend thousands on a new rug, but they didn't want to settle for mass-produced cheap alternatives either. Revival is a global company with teams in the U.S. as well as weaving regions in India, Turkey, and Morocco. They blend traditional techniques with
contemporary designs. And let me tell you something. I got a revival rug and I actually decided to put it in the bedroom and it's under the bed right now. And I absolutely love it. It had been hardwood floors all this time. And to actually put my feet out of the bed in the morning and have them touch that beautiful, beautiful rug. It feels so luxurious and so lovely. I am beyond thrilled with it. Oh,
And the ordering experience, the shipping experience, I mean, everything was just so easy and fast. If you're in the market for a new rug, check out Revival Rugs. Visit RevivalRugs.com slash WWC and use code CRAPPENS20 for 20% off your first order. That's RevivalRugs.com slash WWC, code CRAPPENS20. One more time, RevivalRugs.com slash WWC with code CRAPPENS20.
NS20 to save 20% off your order. So then back at the resort, Erica's like, "Oh, we were just so silly last night, wasn't we?" And Dorit says, "I was just so frustrated. You know, Sutton is not consistently a beach. Susan is not consistently mean-spirited. She's not, you know, sometimes she's a decent person. Why do I have black teeth right now? Nobody knows."
Yeah, she's been... That was weird, right? I was like, were you brushing? Maybe she was doing charcoal? Maybe she was doing that, like, charcoal thing. Yeah, that's what I was wondering. Yeah, and Erica's like, you know, because the moments when she's absolutely great, and you have the moments, then, you know, and then you bring it to the table, but, like, I brought my thoughts to the table, and instead it turned into everyone's being mean to me, it's a pile-on, this is a gang-up! And then Dorit's like, ooh, that's her, yeah. Yeah.
My problem with Sutton is that even when she's apologising, it's performative. And I feel like it's a sucker punch coming right around the corner. A sucker punch! Um, uh,
So Dorit's like, Sutton is lacking sincerity, but now it's gotten to a degree I don't trust most of the things that come out of her mouth. You didn't have any problems with Rinna. I mean, look, Rinna was like probably one of the least sincere people, right? Like, how are you? It's so good to see you. You know, um...
Well, it's also Dorit saying she lacks sincerity when Dorit is sitting there in like a hundred thousand dollars worth of fake clothes and brands dripping off of her. She's in a house she's pretending to own that is owned by some other company that is now kicking her out because she's bankrupt. I mean, she's one of the fakest people who's ever been on the show. Girl, you're saying this line with 10 different accents that aren't yours. Could you please stay away from insincerity allegations, ma'am?
So back to the chocolatier. Lady who got $10,000 stolen from the home goods. I mean, the dollar store. I mean, the best buy. So Sutton's like, back at the chocolatier, Sutton's like, I've had to have a come to Jesus moment. With who? Yourself? Yes. Me and Jesus. And guess what? Jesus pummeled me. And that's it.
And I had to say, look, this is hard. I had to remember that both of those girls have gone through right now. And then I have to look at where I am in my life, a lady who has a tiny boutique that may or may not be open somewhere in West Hollywood. And that must be hard for them to look at.
So we see, let's see, what do we see here? So she's like, I'm done. Sorry, I was in a different part. She's like, I'm done. And yeah, when she's like, it's just so difficult, you know, where you've got these people. And I just, I just think, look at these poor women who can never be me. That must be hard on them. And Boza's like, uh,
I don't think so. Yeah. I don't know that they're jealous of you. She's like, what wouldn't they be jealous of? What would they? Name one thing. She's like, oh, yeah, I'm done with this conversation. I just think the allegiance from Kyle goes to those two and always will, to be honest. So it's like, yeah, you see it sudden. So stop chasing it. You know where Kyle's loyalties are and just...
You, what you have to do is have a moment where you say, fuck this bitch, fuck this fake bitch who acts like she's going to have my back. And she never does. And at the end of the day, she's always going to be, you know, you get nothing for nothing. I'm sorry I did it. Uh, but at the end of the day, she is always going to have those two, those two women's backs. And so stop trying to chase it and just make your own happiness.
So then back to Eric and Dorit, Eric is like, "Well, whatever you're going through, she's going through." "Okay, fine. Well, what made me angry was when Miss Jennifer Tilly said it was coordinated." And Dorit's like, "Oh, she felt like it was coordinated, really. Just a bunch of excuses. So you should say something tonight, you two." "All right, let's do it." "Not coordinated at all." "Not at all!"
Okay, I'll stop and then you come in and then if you're going too long, I'll butt in and I'll say something and then you say something also. And I actually wrote out some note cards and you can just study those. And if things get really bad, we can bring in a teleprompter. Great. So now they're getting ready for carnival and Bose has arranged for them to all have these crazy outfits, you know, big feathered showgirl outfits for carnival. So they're putting them all on. And this part was so fucking funny watching all these ladies put these on.
The most horrific part was when Dorit's hairdresser tells her to twerk and Dorit does it.
I've never seen an ass clap that little. I mean, I've never seen that happen. Was it? Like, I'm not even sure if it was an ass clap. I mean, it was just kind of like, it was just like she was just doing like weird squats or something like that. Yeah, she did some squats. It was just like an up and down. It wasn't really a twerk. It was more like a blurk. It was just, it was not good. And this is why you never trust your hairdresser because her hairdresser was like, oh my God, yes, Icon nailed it.
So Bose is saying that they're celebrating Carnival tonight, you know, because it's such a huge thing in the Caribbean and beyond. And so they're just going to celebrate it, which was, and so they're all putting on different outfits and different levels of undress, depending on how comfortable they are. So Erica was basically wearing bare minimum and she looked fucking amazing. And then Kathy was funny because she basically had like a, like a caftan on and she had her, but she had her wings on at the same time, but it all worked. It actually was all kind of great. And, but they all didn't,
They were not in a space that was made for the wings because they all had to walk sideways through hallways and through doors. And they were like, how do we do this? That shit was so funny when they all walked up to the dinner table and they were like, how are we going to sit down? But they did. And then they all sat down and they just showed what the table looked like from the outside. And it was just pure feathers. Like walls of crazy feathers.
You know, the producers were like, we're never doing this again. We cannot get good shots because they couldn't shoot through people's shoulders. They just had to stick a camera at the one end of the table and just like hope for the best. So funny. It was amazing.
Oh, yeah. Okay, so they did that. And then Jennifer, let me, I'm just fast forwarding to get to it. I know, me too. I'm like. Okay, so they get some rum punches and they're cheersing to their final night and all that. And Jennifer is complimenting Kathy on her rhinestones. And she goes, well, you need to take those feathers to the next Rockefeller Ball or something. And Kathy goes, actually, I don't know if they approve.
Like, wow. So the Rockefellers are anti carnival or. Yeah, there was something sort of there was a there was a there was a subtext there that I think that maybe we all picked up on. Right. Yeah. Or like they do they shoot birds? I mean, what's their deal?
I'm not sure. So, um, uh, I'm still, by the way, I'm still scrolling through so much of this Feather shit. So Erica's like, well, everybody, so everyone's getting along. So Erica's like, well, it is the finale. We're in Feathers. Let's fucking do this. Right, bitches? Okay. I have a question. I heard about Dorit and I planning this thing on the boat.
Who sang it? Is it you, Jennifer Tilly? Or is it you, Garthel? Oh, boy. I was like, oh, Erica, what a badass. Wow, you're really going to get somebody to confess to something horrible. So Jennifer Tilly's like, um, well...
Listen, if I feel bad, if it means you feel bad, Erica, you know, yesterday people were saying what's going on with Sutton and, you know, we were just sort of, here's how it appeared. That's all I meant to say. She goes, well, when I went to it today, it was very calm, very adult. I was like, sure. No. And then Erica's like, but because of our history, because I want to sincerely move on. And I believe you do too. Because Erica's doing the intense articulation thing.
I believe you do too. You want to move on as well. So it's like, yes, I do want to move on from this table. All these feathers are very agitating to me. But also, this is kind of unfair because Erica's confronting her about what happened last night and being like, how dare you say that?
And then she's saying, well, Sutton didn't feel that way. Well, Erica went to see her today and we see a clip of Erica going to visit her and saying, oh, well, your friends, Garcelle and Jennifer, said that we did this to you on purpose. Is that true? And she's like, well, I can speak to what they said. And she goes, well, I'm asking you right now. Did you know that, do you know that was being said or not? Like,
what kind of mystery is this Erica? It's so stupid. And Sutton's like, no, I didn't know that at all. So Sutton's not really standing up for her friends either. But Sutton should have said, yeah, my feelings were hurt by that whole thing. And I told them and they went and stood up for me. It's not that big of a deal.
But also, why is Erica being so aggro about this point? Why doesn't she just sit there and say, listen, I want to talk about yesterday. I know that some of you believe that what Dorit and I did was a coordinated attack. I know it may have looked like that. And I just want to let you know it was not coordinated. And even if it were coordinated, I wouldn't even be embarrassed about it being coordinated because we both feel the same way about the same thing. And it's okay for two people to
feel the same way and I said something about how I felt so I just want you to know that we were not coordinating to try to make her feel like shit I was just saying my piece well she can't do it that way but she's
She can't do it that way because that's what she does. No, she makes it to where you're questioning something else. It's not about what she said. It's about what people accused her of how she said it. Or it's not about the crimes Tom committed. It's that people questioned her. So she's always changing the framing of it to yell at somebody else for her own bullshit. But Sutton's not helping here either. Sutton's not standing up for her friends at all because she just wants Erica to be nice to her. So she's like, I have no idea why they would do that.
Fuck off Sutton. Sutton's not a good friend. I'm sorry. It is kind of wild that they would not show a whole scene with Erica and Sutton because they had a huge fight and clearly this was maybe a moment to make amends and they just only show the clip of it in the flashback. It's a little odd.
So Erica's like, listen, I don't care where it came from. I don't care how it resolves. It's important that you look at me and you hear what I'm saying. That was not a coordinated attack. And that's all. And thank you for listening. My TED talk is over. Gosh. So Garcelle's like, well, let me just say this.
Erica Jane, you and I are building our friendship and I appreciate it. And we've come a long way. And you said, you don't believe, you don't believe it, but we have. And Garcelle's basically saying how she's trying to focus on having better relationships with these women. And obviously that doesn't really work out because she's like, bye, leaving the show. Yeah. So she's going to concentrating on not only being friends with Sutton this next year, which is out the window already. So Boze is so proud. And she's like, I feel like we're about to take wedding vows. Ha ha.
and erica's like clearly i'm not ever doing that again i love you but no listen is this a toxic sisterhood yes but at the end of the day we can come together we can have laughs we can be silly and support each other no matter what and then we can also realize because it is a toxic sisterhood why the fuck are we here goodbye everyone goodbye america i'm out and so we see them party at carnival and dance in their outfits and stuff
And Trixie is singing, "Watch me go, go, go! Watch me go, go, go!" And then, um...
Kyle starts, there's fire dancers and then it starts raining. And Kyle's like, I love the rain. And I love you guys. It's just all like so happy and sisterhood. So here are the exciting things happening in people's lives. Garcelle continues to call the shots on her sets, but her favorite new role is grandma to Oliver's new daughter, Valley, which why, you know what?
I just feel like Valley is a curious name. Like, you know, you know, the phrase peaks and valleys. Yeah. You know, it's like you're a better part of that phrases. Have you been to also, it's kind of like Los Angeles, you know, kind of a defeatist name, you know, especially if you give them a sibling and name it peak. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, okay.
So then we see her as "Bose has started her fertility journey with Keely, choosing the natural route. Girl, I will eat an ice cream sandwich if you ever get pregnant with a baby on purpose with Keely. This is not happening. I'm not buying this for two seconds. And I refuse to even pretend anymore. No." And Keely finally said, "I love you." So that's nice. Wow. A full like four months after you started trying to have children for him. Yeah. Great. Yeah. Great. Sounds great.
Hey, I've learned something. I've learned that I can be kind of a jerk. I can be a better friend, a better daughter, change anything from this year. It would probably be, if I would change anything, it'd probably be my relationship with Dorit. I wish I'd handled it better. As in, I wish I'd called her a fucking bitch instead of just a bitch. Oh, well. And her wrap up is Sutton and Dorit's remains, their relationship remains on ice. It's so chilled that Sutton actually drank it. But hey, she's getting along with her mom, so that's good. Yeah.
When I get home, I just know I have so many. I have to have a conversation with Mauricio and decisions will have to be made. And if I'm not going to be married to Mauricio, I have to have a great life with someone. I don't know who it is, but I'm going to stand in the wings of a concert until I figure out who that lucky person is. And this is all bullshit because she does not break up with Mo either. Kyle and Mauricio continue their stalemate over their next steps and Kyle remains open to love in her life while hopefully avoiding the paparazzi that she calls. Mm-hmm.
And then we have Dorit's big wrap-up. Dorit, take it away. Uh, well, I'm a hell of a lot chiffer than I thought I was. I want to focus me attention not in places filled with toxic energy, not in friendships, and not in mummeridge. I want peace. I want a penis. I deserve it. And I'm going to fight for it.
Dorit and PK currently have no plans to rekindle their relationship, but they are working on co-parenting better. And Dorit is considering filtering PK's emails to her junk folder. That was a nice season finale. And then it goes one month later. I'm like, what? That's how we roll now. We can't just pick it up the cameras. So now we have the most. Listen,
I enjoy picking up the cameras when there's a real scandal, but now this is, this is not a pick up the cameras moment. This is something that can be covered in the reunion. So one month later, so Garcelle, actually, I'm glad that this happened because something very great happened. So first we see Garcelle with Oliver and the kids, who cares? And then we see Bose doing yoga, who cares? And then most importantly, Sutton goes into her backyard and there is a dead rat lying
lying by her pool in the most dead rat position on its back, like, "Ew!" And she's like, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
So amazing. I was like, okay, it was all worth it. So then we go to Erica's house and she's like, look at me. One of you now.
Poor tiny little house eating ice cream like a poverty stricken hooker. Here we go. Watch me eat some ice cream. And then she reads on her phone. I'm August 27th, Tom Girardi. My husband was found guilty of embezzlement. And then she looks away and it's supposed to look like she's emoting, but she really does look like a robot with spinning beach ball in its eyes. Like, boop, boop.
I would never. Could never. I never saw this coming. Really? Do you not read articles or see headlines for four years? Or check your own pocket of lawsuits, you fucking weirdo. I mean, I'm assuming she meant like previously in her relationship. She goes, Tom was loved. He was admired. Yeah.
All the judges paid for his meals. They just loved him so much. And he was accomplished. And this is how his story ended. I don't know that I will ever get over that. Yeah. Oh, well. I'm so sorry, Erica. You thought you'd get away with it, sucker. And you did, actually. She's kind of the hero of the story because she actually got away with everything. So then Kyle comes in and she's like, wow, this place is so nice. This place is so cheap.
Wow, wallpaper. That's great. So cool. So Kyle says that Erica has proven to be a loyal friend time and time again. So Kyle is saying, I knew this would be a hard... Kyle's so dumb. She goes, I knew this would be a hard day for Erica. And, you know, as soon as I heard about this, you were the first person I thought of. It's like, really? When you heard about Erica's husband going to jail, you thought about Erica? Wow, you really...
The way your mind works. I wish I could get a tour of it. It's just, it's amazing. I saw that headline and I immediately thought, "How is Jamie Lee Curtis dealing with this?" So, she said to bring you a wind chime. Hope you like it. So Erica's like, "Terrible! Right before the verdict, I was doing so good. You know, I was looking at wallpaper, thinking about wallpaper."
talking about wallpaper and I was feeling so good about it and then the next day it was like I just I just wanted to sleep I didn't want to go back back to that dark terrible place when these walls didn't even have wallpaper on them I realized if these walls could talk they'd say please stop singing inside and that hurt that hurt it hurt me deeply but you know I've gone into all signs of depression I'm eating one bite of ice cream at a time I'm sleeping late
I'm trying to fuck cannibals in my neighborhood again. All the self-destructive things that I was doing back a couple of years ago. And it made me think, wow.
"What are times?" And then she keeps looking off into space and trying to cry, but she is just ice this chick. She is just ice. And it's hilarious that they're like, "Hey, let's end this season by having Erica be vulnerable." She just can't do it. Can't. It's like, actually, it winds up being a deeply uninteresting scene. She's like, "My drink and my medication. It was all this pressure and I thought, 'Oh my God, it's happening again! It's happening! I feel like I'm being dragged down the underneath! Oh God!' But I'm actually fine."
So anyway, he was convicted of four counts of wire fraud and it's like 80 years or some shit. I don't know. He doesn't even have 80 days in him. Good luck, motherfucker. I mean, I'm sad. He's now being represented by public defenders and she doesn't speak to him. And you know, this whole thing, like we give Erica so much shit, but I have to keep because you won't even call Tom or go see Tom. I mean, I know there's legal cases and stuff going on, but that man kind of stole all the money and funneled it into your stuff. The least you could do is like check in on him.
I mean, Jesus Christ. Yeah. Or maybe she's just saying this because he's, uh, she doesn't want to get in trouble with, I mean, I don't know, but I mean, look, I will, I'm not going to be, I'm not going to be a total dick, even though I'd like to be a total dick. Put it on me.
No, but look, you're in a relationship with someone for 20 years. You know, I will acknowledge that it is sad to see this person that that was like your life. Now they're just sort of this is this is like their epilogue. It is sad from her perspective to see it.
For the rest of us, like, whatever. He was a fraudster. So it is what it is, you know? But so she's like, that's not over for me. And it's not over. I still have shit in front of me that he put me through. This experience with this man. Well, it was great. The ending is not okay. And for many reasons, my feeling of sadness, my feeling of being overwhelmed, my feeling of loss, those were very real. And I don't have to apologize for my feelings because no one lived in that house but the two of us.
There were good times. There were bad times.
She's doing that whole thing. And so Kyle's like, "I hope you know that I'm always here for you, as long as you keep yelling at Garcelle for me." And she's like, "I do know that. I do, Kyle." You know who we're talking about again? Who is this? I know, Kyle does like a look, because Erika keeps doing these monologues of like, "The best of times, the worst of times, I had it all, it all fell. There was a wall, there was a wall breaker." And Kyle, you just see Kyle staring off into space like, "I wonder how bees are made?"
Kyle being a shitty friend is one of my favorite things. Just not listening. Wait, you never told me that you were married.
She does that thing all the time. Wait, you never told me that Tom was in trouble. Yeah. Wait, Tom's in trouble? Who's Tom? Did you tell me this? Who's Tom? Are you sure you told me? You never told me that. Erica's like, well, the hard part is over. And Kyle, I want to tell you this right now, woman to woman. You and I have a unique opportunity to be a different version of ourselves right here, right now. We've had to walk through a lot of pain, a lot of heartache, a lot of lesbianism. I'm all right. Sorry, I had to try it. Kyle's like, wait a minute. Okay.
Yeah, she basically is like, now we can reinvent ourselves. It's a safe space. Are you a lesbian? That's what this is about. We'll be back with that, Tom.
And she's like, "I'm gonna have some fucking fun. We deserve to have some fucking fun." Actually, you don't really deserve to have some fucking fun, but I have to credit you for having as much fun as you've had over the past few years, because I think that could have killed. I think what Erica went through, whether I believe it's partially her fault, I do, or not,
I think that the getting caught and all of that, I think that would have killed most people. But Erica's like, fuck it. Let's do a show in Vegas and go back to Broadway and party your fucking asses off, you know? And I have to credit her for that resilience because not everybody has that. And you know what? She's right. It is time for her to have some fun. You know, after all that, the misery and the boredom and the lack of joy that was in St. Lucia or before that when they...
went off to, I don't know, to London or... All these international trips. What a drain. Time to have fun, right? All her day-to-day activities, having to go to her...
not nine to not five job. When is she finally going to be able to have fun? I know. That's just what Erica means. Just a relaxing, fun life. So Kyle goes, yeah, you know what I mean. You know what? The world is our oyster, Kyle, really. Now you're just leaving yourself open. And then Erica goes, the world is literally our oyster. No, the world is literally not an oyster. It's figuratively an oyster. I'm just going to say that right now. Don't emphasize that it's literally an oyster because it's disgusting. We all have hepatitis now.
I love that Kyle just left us with the most lesbian imagery of all time to end the season. But don't talk about lesbianism, please! The world is our Clambake. The world is a pink taco. The world is a Georgia O'Keeffe painting. All the world's a stage at Lilith Fair. All right, everybody, we sure love you. Thanks for being with us this season. We'll be here for the next month doing the Festivus of
Best of us. Festivus, best of us reunion episode. So join us for that. Join us on Patreon for White Lotus recaps and airport snaps, airport recaps, and also videos. And come get tickets for DC and Philly this week and all of our shows coming up in the next couple of months over at watchwhatcrappens.com. And we'll talk to you next time. Bye. Bye.
Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Put your hands together for Carly Clap. Catherine DiBernardo has our heart-o. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. Dana C. Dana Do. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Etcho!
We never miss her call, it's Diane Call. Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trick-a-less. Jamie, she has no less namey. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Hava Nagila Webber.
We could all learn from Jennifer Kearns. She's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trach. Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Mannock's door. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock. Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey Bee. Rigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay Dee. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox.
Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg. This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian. I love-a-ya Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson. She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes, we can-a, it's Sedana. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. The Bay Area Betches.
It's our queen. It's Queen Penland.
La Ifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Know Your Worth with Jason Kerr. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish. She's not harsh. She's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Junie. My favorite Murdo. Karen McClure.
She gets an A, it's Kelly B. We love him madly, it's Kyle Pod Shadley. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it, it's Lola Alcalani. The incredible, edible Matthew Sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rhodes.
Give him hell, Miss Noelle. She's the queen bee. It's Sarah Lemke. Shannon out of a can and Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plain. She ain't no shrinking violet cootar. We love you guys.
If you like Watch What Crappens, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey. Introducing Instagram teen accounts, a new way to keep your teens safer as they grow, like making sure they've got the right gear for writing. Knee pads. Check.
And helmet? Done. See you, Dad. New Instagram teen accounts. Automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see. Have you ever wondered how a circus performer could become the most powerful woman in the Byzantine Empire? Even the Royals is a podcast from Wondery that pulls back the curtain on royal families from ancient empires to modern monarchs to show you the darker side of what it means to be royalty. Be
Before she ruled an empire, Theodora was a teen sensation in circus shows featuring dancing bears, burlesque performers, and blood-soaked chariot races. But when her star came crashing down, she clawed her way from rock bottom to the very top, using everything from comedy to espionage to get there. Empress Theodora didn't just survive. She revolutionized women's rights across the Byzantine Empire.
like changing laws to let women divorce men, own property, and bring abusive men to justice. For all her work in pioneering, she's remembered as the most powerful Byzantine empress in history. Follow Even the Royals on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Even the Royals early and ad-free by joining Wondery Plus.