Voice notes are seen as a form of personal connection, evoking a sense of intimacy and immediacy that typed texts may lack.
The speaker had a dream where their foot hurt, making them believe they couldn't walk, which influenced them to silence the alarm in real life.
The speaker would prioritize safety and comfort over extravagance, opting for a secure, gated community rather than a lavish but potentially less secure residence.
The speaker purchased the arcade machine on impulse, influenced by a desire for a cool, nostalgic item that friends could enjoy, despite its lack of popular game titles.
The speaker finds cold showers uncomfortable and impractical, questioning their effectiveness as a mental discipline tool compared to more established methods.
The packaging for Wicked movie dolls mistakenly included a link to a corn-related website, potentially exposing children to inappropriate content and leading to a recall.
SeatGeek provides transparency about ticket prices, indicating whether a ticket is overpriced or a good deal, which helps the speaker make informed purchasing decisions.
Stamps.com offers convenience and cost savings by bringing postal services online, allowing businesses to manage shipping needs efficiently without visiting physical post offices.
The speaker prefers crackers that are crunchy yet soft inside, disliking those that are hard and potentially damaging to teeth.
Cotton candy packaging is efficient, providing a generous amount of product without waste, which aligns with the speaker's preference for value and minimal excess.
Welcome back to the base- Welcome back to the basement yard. Frank, how's it going? Livin' it up. Tedem. Yeah. Apple Watch. Is that a new Apple Watch? I've had this. I've had this for a while. Remember I threw it on stage when you gifted me the Rolex? That's right. This was the one I threw. I got it back. You picked it back up. I picked it back up. Did it crack? These things are pretty durable, dude. Do you have an Apple Watch? No. You should get one. Why? Um, I don't know. Yeah.
I don't like it. It's good. It is good. It's good at tracking steps. Do you talk into your wrist and text back with it? No, no, I do not. Okay, because my mom does that, and I want to strike her down. She's like, yeah, Shan, I'll be back with the gross. I got to say, this whole, like, and you're kind of part of the people that I want to yell out right here. Surprise, surprise. This new movement. Welcome back, baby. Yeah, by the way.
New movement of people just sending voice notes instead of texts. I like voice notes. Fuck you. Write to me. Why? I want to feel like that was a form of love back in the day. I'm still texting. No, you're not, though, because then you're not.
No, you're not I don't cuz Joey will do this thing my whole set of fucking 90 second voice note I won't do that so that I'm against that I'm with I'm with and I know where I know where this started and I want to see if you say it before I call you out for it What are you talking? It's fucking business efficiency Greg big fucking big no balls boy. No well he does yo, bro This kid the other day. He sent me four in a row. I called him. I said, what are you doing?
Because like one of them is just like, he'll start talking like, oh, I fucked this up. I'll, I'll, I have to redo this. And I'm like, one, why are you saying that? Just delete it. And then you send it to me. So I call him and I'm like, what are you doing? We have lost the art of communication and you're part of the brain. Like reason that I want to get mad about this because you do that. Also, I'll respond to you and then you'll do like the response where you like on iMessage where you hold down the message and you, and you just like heart it.
That's not a response, Joey. Well, it depends what you're saying. Or a thumbs up or thumbs down or like question mark. Because if you just ask me a question like, yo, a yes or no question, yes or no. Just say like, yeah. Just come on, communicate. You are part of it. Communicate. Frank, I'll text you. Four days go by. He'll pick up the conversation like you were in a car ride. One.
One, don't make me parse through my text to make sure if that's true because there are plenty of times where I text you and you don't fucking text me bitch. Two, we're both people that have our own lives. Sometimes we see something, we forget it. No, sometimes, I'll fully admit, sometimes there are times where I see something and I say, I'm going to respond to that and then a day goes by and I forget and I'm like, oh, well fuck, now it's a day. Now I have to wait another day in order to respond and say, I'm sorry I did that. But like, that's the way that the world works sometimes. Don't you dare, bitch, bitch. Hold on, one time me and Greg texted Frankie about something.
That had to do with business. Four or five hours? And then he responded back with, sorry, I got tied up at hockey practice. And I'm like...
This kid better go to the NHL with a five-hour practice. Not only that, when we go to hockey practice, I'm with Ruby, and Ruby just runs back and forth and gets in an elevator, and I need to fucking chase her. In an elevator? She's a big elevator kid right now. She just loves elevators? Dude, she loves elevators. I kind of like them, too. I'm not going to lie. Everyone had a good old fun time pressing buttons on elevators. Escalators? Fire. I love escalators. I get scared of escalators. Of whom?
I'm now realizing it might be bullshit because my dad told this story. Tell us about this Colombian myth that he made up. No, I don't think it's a myth because there have been instances of this happening. Someone got sucked down? He said that he saw someone's shoelaces got caught in the teeth of an escalator and it ripped their foot.
No way. I mean, I think that actually has happened. The chances of my father having witnessed it or saw someone is very slim. That could probably happen to like Stuart Little, but I don't know about a Hume. But I mean, I'm with you there.
there. I don't like getting on or off of escalators because I'm always stepping over it. I jump. I jump. I jump. I never step on like the crack. And I also lift my like because I usually use them in airports. I'm not really escalating all the time. But like I'll hop my bag over it even.
Really? Yeah, I don't know why. Oh. Maybe super stir. You think it's going to pull your fucking Gucci bag into it? I don't have a Gucci bag. I'm sorry. What bag do you have, though? Go ahead. What bag do I have? Your YSL travel bags. I don't have YSL. I'm sorry. Your...
You got nothing. That's it. That's all I got. I know. Because it's 2009. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Your Ed Hardy FUBU bag. I will say, though, that you, as someone that is active as you, like, this is really good at tracking steps and calories and stuff like that. I have a watch where...
But it's just... It's not like an Apple Watch. So it's just for, like, that kind of shit. But it's not like... Oh, it's like a dedicated workout one. Yeah. Like, Apple's not... It's like full smart tech integration. Yeah, because I would never... Like, I can't think of a reason why I would wear that. And I don't want my text messages popping up. My fucking headphones now do this thing where it reads my text messages when I'm listening to music. It drives me...
You can program it so it doesn't do that. I tried. I can't figure it out. I will say something that's cool that this does is like if you have like Google Maps or something open and it's not like, you know, hooked up to like CarPlay. What is it called? Yeah, CarPlay. And like say you have like your hand on the steering wheel, it'll pop up like make a left in 100 feet or something like that. So that's pretty pretty pretty. Doesn't CarPlay sound like porn? A little bit, honestly. Or corn?
Don't say the P word. That's it. Now you're done. We're corn boys. It sounds like corn, though. Get in my car and play. We're using the word corn in place of corn. Right. But when I say we're corn boys, meaning that we're just because we use that, not like we are. Oh, yeah. We're not doing corn. We're not doing corn. Yeah, no, no.
Eating corn though. Yeah, I love corn. Love is crazy, but I'm cool with Mexican street corn now we're talking yeah, and I'm talking about the food because of the action Now he's a Mexican street corner like a hold on listen. They're outside doing that Algorithm you fucked with our ability. Yeah now say corn now. I can't even talk about corn now people think that we're talking about The corn that involves a lot of
That doesn't even work either. I was going to say juices, but there's juices in corn too. Is there? Yeah, wet corn, dude. I mean, if there's butter. And just corn is just naturally juicy. Is it? Yeah, I'm eating some juicy corn. Like real corn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, like CarPlay, it's like, ooh. It sounds like a genre. Yeah, exactly. I can almost guarantee that it is. Foreplay, CarPlay, CarPlay.
Yeah, like, oh, we were feeling each other out before we got home. It was a little car play. Exactly. You know, it does sound a little dirty. Maybe that's why they named it that. Who knows? I could almost guarantee that's not why they named it. I also agree that it's probably not. Yeah. But, yeah, I actually, I got, behind the scenes, I've been talking to Joey a lot about...
Like trying to remain active and get my steps in and stuff. I got a treadmill. I finally got like a treadmill. A secondhand one. More marketplace, baby. Live it up. FB Mark? Yeah. Which... Did you have to like go to someone's like garage and grab it or something? House. House.
Oh, so you met a stranger. Yeah. And you took their workout equipment. There were three strangers there. Three? It's funny. Oh, they were protection. I pulled up. No, they, like, they, I guess, maybe. But, like, look at me. My picture is, like, me in a Hawaiian shirt. What are you protecting against? I don't know, dude. You're in, like, rural Pennsylvania. Maybe they saw Alvarez and they were like, we better have backup. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, it is entirely possible. No, but, like, I showed up and I was just like, they could fuck me up if they wanted to. And, like...
But like there's a way. What a weird way to try and like rob somebody though. Like, oh, let me come buy your fucking treadmill. I think people have been doing it forever. Was it a giveaway or did you cash? Venmo. Nice. You know, we did that whole bad boy. But was fully, I don't know if I told you this. I was fully ready. I was just like, all right, I'm committing to like waking up at a certain time each morning and just walking on this treadmill. Just to get some steps in. Step it up. You know? But my brain convinced me not to.
And not in like, so this is an interesting excuse. So here's the thing. I'd like to start exercising, but I got a thing in my brain that makes me not go. No, no, no, no. Like my, I gaslit myself with my dreams.
You can imagine what the human experience is like for us on the real... Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You're gaslighting so much that it's now like... Now I'm a victim of my own brain. You know like Harry Potter where it's like a spell accidentally bounces off the wall and hits you? Yeah, and it hits you. And then it's like Gilderoy Lockhart just like, who am I? You know? Like that's...
I got Gilderoy Lockhart. Yeah, exactly. What happened? But so I set my alarm to wake up at 5 a.m. So I can go and I can do my thing. But I had a dream that I couldn't walk. But do you know why? Was it just a dream thing where it's like my feet aren't moving? It was a dream thing where like my foot hurt and I had like a ball in my foot and I couldn't walk. A ball? Yeah. Yeah.
And I remember in my dream being like, I have to not walk at all. So I silenced my alarms. In real life? In real life, silenced my alarms because of what my dreams were convincing me. This is some sci-fi shit.
This is like dreams bleeding into reality. What is he thinking about before bed? Where you're like, oh, no, I probably shouldn't do that. And your body's like, I got you. But, like, I go to sleep, like, fully, like, yeah, I'm going to do this. I'm excited to do this. I have a whole routine. But there's another person in there going, no. But the little man inside me that got in there is just like, I had a dream that I couldn't walk and all I could eat was prosciutto. Let me...
We also say this, there is no little man inside me. Just want to also make that clear. Yeah. But the, I, my brain in its dreamlike state convinced myself to,
To not wake up and do this. What a bastard. Yeah. Bastard. What an absolute bastard. So you had to have waken up before five and then you just like, you shut off your alarms. I remember shutting it off. Cause I wore my watch because I don't. So I put my alarms on, on silent. So they don't wake the rest of, you know, so they don't wake Becca. What does that vibrate? It vibrates. Yeah. So it'll vibrate on your wrist. And I remember being like, Oh no.
But it was in my dream. Right. You weren't fully awake yet. I wasn't fully awake. And I, it was like, I fucking, I woke up when Maeve woke up and I was just like, oh fuck.
I'm such a little bitch. Now you got to battle yourself. I mean... Your dream self. That's a classic battle. You know, like you versus yourself. Right, yeah. You know, yourself. That's a motivational poster right there. The only one in your way is yourself. That's right. But they're not mentioning that it's your dream self. Exactly. That it's shutting off your fucking alarm. It's the Freddy Krueger version of myself that's trying to fucking...
Erase my ability to be accurate. Right, not gonna kill you quickly, just making sure you don't exercise. Slowly, yeah. There's no knife fingers here. There's just an absolute filling up artery of fucking... Yeah, exactly. Wow, okay. Well, how do you combat that? I don't know, dude. Double alarm? Are you a double alarm? I am, so I have a double alarm, but I guess both got silenced.
Oh, so you double shot. My dream self took my alarms behind the shed and put two fucking bullets in the back of their skull. Wow, so maybe you're going to have to trip alarm then. I don't know what I'm going to do, honestly. This is something I thought of this morning. I was just like, I need to... You're going to laugh at me, but I was like, I need to strengthen myself. Elaborate. What do you mean by that? Mentally, right? Mentally. Right, so how do you plan on doing that? Just like... Yeah, talk to me, sensei. You're like, I have to spend time just...
Controlling my thoughts. I'll tell you where it's going to possibly end up. I did see a TikTok this morning that was just like, do 10 seconds of a cold shower. Then do 20 seconds of a cold shower. Okay. And then maybe that's how I strengthen my brain to not be a douchebag dream version of myself. I don't know if that's going to work, but I'm optimistic that maybe it does. And I've tried to do the cold shower thing before. Oh, you have? Not... Yeah. I'll tell you this.
I wouldn't qualify what I did as a try. What was it? Yeah, I'm just like, ew. Like, why would I? Like, I get why people, and I know like the ice baths and that kind of stuff. Like, that's different. But just like, not shower time. I can't. Ice baths, I don't know how people do it. I've done it. The bathhouse that I went to with Greg before, they have a freezing cold. We all heard that, right? Yeah.
I just want to make sure we've all heard that. I almost died in the fucking bathtub, I was going to say, in the bathhouse last time. Way too much time in the sauna. But they have a cold plunge pool filled with bleach or chlorine because it stinks like chemicals. Oh, well, yeah. But I got in it, and it was like 40 degrees, and I did like 45 seconds, and I was like, I'm the coolest guy in the world. And I get that, but a shower where I'm like...
Or when people say, just get in the shower and turn it on. I'm like, this is stupid. This is crazy. Don't do that. I'll tell you, I am in equal parts impressed and equal parts hate that guy that in some part, it's like North Dakota. It's just like, good morning. And it's just a big ice bath and he just breaks the ice on top. And he's like, we're going to sit in for three minutes today. And he sits in and he's just like.
The world is not about against you. No, so that guy... The world is about being in support of your hopes and dreams. And I'm just like, fuck you, you're Ice Beth. That guy, I think, is... That guy, actually, I talked to him. I wish I could remember his name. I'm glad you don't. He followed me, though. So I was like, dude, I've seen your TikToks. So there's a chance he follows us?
Fuck you. I just want to just like, fuck you, dude. Yeah. That guy's skin must be like the tightest little tight. Yeah. But yeah, it's like, he's like today. Good morning. It's zero degrees. Three degrees Fahrenheit out here. And today we're talking about gratitude. Yeah. He breaks the ice and he gets in. He's like,
It's not your dad. It's you. Yeah, exactly. He gives a speech. I'm watching you do something I hate. I don't need to hear you fucking awaken like some like trauma in me. No, he's a cool guy. But so the reason why I like talk to him because then he started doing this thing where he would break a piece of the ice off and eat it. But then he started using hot sauce. I was like, Oh yeah, you told me about that. You told me about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you sent him everything bagel hot sauce on ice. Good on everything, friend. Uh, but, uh,
When I eventually own a home, definitely get in a little tub. Oh, like a cold plunge tub? Yeah. And a sauna? I'm going to ask you some questions offline about your house because I'm very intrigued. What? Just put it in the backyard. Yeah, no, no. I know. I'm just confused as to where your budget is going to end. Are you going to commit to that $40 million house you sent me earlier or a $40 million house? Yeah. I don't know how I'm paying for that with IOUs.
That ain't happening. You owe no one. Everyone owe you. I don't have $40 million. Yeah, it's all right. Do you remember when I posted? Because there was an article that said, here's Joe Santagrara's network. It was like $293 million. And I posted it. And I was just like, Dan, they got me. And people that I know in real life were like, yo, congrats. And I was like, are you an idiot? You're an idiot.
I was like, I don't have $293 million. - Can I ask you a serious question? - Oh God. - If you had $293 million, I know you are, you're a lot of people that knows about you. You're big with discipline. Like you internally like to be very self-disciplined and you do, you're very smart with your money. You're always giving financial advice to the people that you appreciate in your life.
At what level of wealth would you just throw that all out the window and just be just just commit to being a fucking dumpster bitch? But what is a dumpster bitch? 30 million dollar house where like to get to your bedroom you need to take like a ferris wheel. Like I'm talking like, alright I'm going to bed. Yeah. Um, uh, I mean a 30 million dollar house. I'll tell you this.
You would probably need at least $300 million. Your watch collection would know no bounds. That would be a big issue. That would be a big fat issue for sure. Yeah, no. I mean, I don't know. Like...
A part of me, like, because I do like looking at that type of content, like seeing like rich people's houses. And then like, it'll be a random whoever who owns like a $40 million house in the Hamptons and like all the shit. Like, I like looking at that stuff. But in reality, I'm like, what the fuck would I do with a house like that? Dude, I've been watching a lot of Shark Tank. And Mark, I saw like an interview with Mark Cuban. And he was just like, I bought a $25 million home.
And there are rooms I have not been in in years. Yeah.
Why? Like, that is wild. Like, there is a certain level of, like, over the top. Like, that's ridiculous. I would... If I had $300 million, I'm sure that I would find a really nice house, but it wouldn't... I don't think it would be $30 million. Like, it would be less than that. But I feel like a $5 million house would probably be where, like... Depending on where it is. If I had $300 million, I'd say $5 million is going into a house, and then I would have...
a couple $5 million houses across the country. I would be more... I think I would pay more to be like...
In a gated community of like safe... Safety is kind of what I would pay for at that point. Yeah, that makes sense. Because I don't need a fucking $30 million apartment. Like, that's crazy. Yeah, to be in a skyscraper where you are basically just like... There's one like underpaid doorman who is just protecting you from whoever wants to come up. Yeah. Like, some shit like that. I don't think I would do. But I would buy stupid shit. I mean, when I started making really good money, I spent $3,000 on an arcade machine that I used...
No, you used a lot. We used it. Five times. You've probably used it more than I did. I probably did. And I gave it away. To? A child that lived on the same block as my mom. Do they still have it? I assume. I'm not keeping tabs on his stuff. I'm going to go ask him for it. I'd like it. That was a cool arcade machine. That was, by the way...
$3,000? You bought that in like 2016. Yeah. That's too much. Oh, it was. Way too much. And I don't even know. I think that I was just like, I want to get something. And it didn't have like... I was like, what the fuck? It didn't have like Super Mario Brothers on it. It had like the... And it didn't have like the big name brand games. There was Frogger on it though. It had Frogger. It had Galaga. And it had like... Did it have Galaga? Alien Invaders. But like...
It didn't have like Super Mario Brothers or like other like Donkey Kong. It had like Donkey Kong 4 does math and 1942 part six where it's like you're a tank now. Just the games that no one was playing. Yeah. That they were able to emulate and get on this thing without facing legal action. Yeah. I don't know. I just got that because I was like, oh, I'm going to get something cool. And I think back then I just didn't. I didn't. I didn't even know what I liked.
Yeah. As a person yet. So I was, I don't know how, bro, I don't know how I thought of that. Or I just thought like it would be cool for people to come over and be like, oh, there's an arcade machine here. That's pretty cool. It was. I mean, I'll be honest with you. I was, I was that. It was really cool. I am the sucker for that where I went up there and I played hours on that thing drinking. What year did you say that was? 2016. Frank.
That was almost a fucking decade ago. I know, isn't that crazy? Eight years ago. We're a thousand years old. Yeah, and we're slowly falling apart. I just woke up this morning and my ankle hurt. I've done nothing. I've done nothing. Dude, it's great. My teeth hurt sometimes. I wake up, my teeth hurt. I think I'm grinding those motherfuckers. What the fuck? I don't know. Teeth. My neck. My back. Pussy and my crack. Frank, demonetize. Porn. Porn. Fuck. Porn, you idiot.
Watch it. What are we calling? Badussy. That's got to be way worse. I don't know. So it's corn. And this? Unaliving. Kitty cat. Meow meow fun time wet cave. I'm not using that.
I'm not using that. Too many words. All right. Wet cave. Speaking of corn, by the way, did you hear about... Did you hear, you know, like Ariana Grande, the Wicked movie is coming out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You must be excited for that. I'm hyped, bro. Yeah? You're going to go see it? I love Wicked. I've seen zero things, heard zero songs. I've never been a consumer of Wicked. I've seen on TikTok...
I don't know the other actress's name. Cynthia Erivo. Cynthia Erivo. But I've seen them being interviewed. They're just crying. They're crying all the time. All the time. But I like watching people crying for nice reasons. Not like that. All right, relax. I want to feel something.
And fucking Joey puts his hand on the pulse and just wants to see people cry. No, I like when people are so happy that they cry. Or like, because there was an interviewer who was saying really nice things about them. And she was just like, I just want you guys to know that you did it. And they start crying. And I'm like, fuck. Dude, this whole press tour...
for the Wicked movie has just been Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo crying for each other and then other people making them cry. Like I saw one interview and it was, that's theater, baby. God damn it. I forget the actress's name, but she was in the Mean Girls movie musical and I think the musical, Renee Rapp. And she's just like making Cynthia Erivo cry and then she's crying. It's perfect. And then it's just like, everyone's crying. I'm on board with a good cry. Me too. But,
It does, like, after a certain point, it's just like, promote the movie. Yeah, yeah. We're crying a lot. No, but I thought it was cool. But, yeah, I'm super psyched about Wicked. Definitely got to go see that. Is that where that song, popular, I'm going to be popular. I've only known the TikTok song version of it, but is that where it comes from? Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay.
Defying Gravity? I've never heard that song in my entire life. Shut your fucking stupid face. I'm defying gravity. I've heard that, and then I don't... You've never heard Defying Gravity? I unfortunately have not. Frank, Frank, get out. Okay.
Of the earth. Leave the planet. Leave the planet. Like spiritually, like... Frank, physically. Like unaliving or... Not unaliving. I mean, launch yourself into space and whatever happens, happens. Bad things will happen. I'll tell you that. Also, for good. That's a banger. Are you just going to... Can I ask you a serious question? Mm-hmm. Do you have Apple Music or Spotify? Spotify. How quick is that album going directly on your Spotify? It's pre-ordered. Yeah. All right.
It's not pre-ordered, but I have Defying Gravity on my running playlist. Really? Bro. It helps you? If you listen to it,
Near the end of the song where they start belting shit out. I guess I gotta get into it because you know I... People... It's funny. I posted a TikTok and people are just like, Frank likes Hamilton and it's like, have you not watched any of the show? Frank won't shut the fuck up about Hamilton. I'm pretty sure that he could do the show. So far, I've gotten the first six songs down pretty well. Yeah. But...
I guess you gotta go. I'm gonna I'm gonna buy you tickets and you're gonna go thanks. That would be sweet Um, cuz I'm sick of this. Are you gonna babysit the kids? No. Oh, we're gonna figure that part. Okay Everybody's going got oh the whole kids are going. No, they're not too expensive miles He would really get a kick out of that out of Hamilton. Yeah, I think so I don't know they were in the car one day and he's like Kiki Do you mind if I play DJ he probably would respect you less if he saw how excited you were during the song Oh, he enjoys it. We were in the car one day. He's like in the crowd. Oh
You're right.
Yeah. You know. What the fuck did you just do, by the way? Because that looked choreographed. It was, maybe. Yeah. You know. We were in the car one day and he was playing DJ and he's like, I got a song for you coming on next. I'm like, I'm so pumped. He played You'll Be Back, the King song. Fire. So sick, dude. Banger. Which is one of the best songs in that. I also have to get to a point. But the Wicked movie is coming out and they have obviously like merchandise that they're putting out and stuff like that. Why did you say merchandise? Because I was going to say merch. Merch and dice. What's dice? What's dice?
They've merchandised Dyson vacuums. No, but the Wicked movie is coming out. They have merchandise. And then they have these like dolls or whatever. And on the packaging, they put wicked.com, which is not the right website. Wicked.com is hello, corn. Wait, what? Corn. Yeah. Wait, wait. I'm going to go. Wicked.com, corn, baby. I'm not talking corn. You're not talking corn. You're not talking corn. You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying? So you're not talking the corn you eat sideways. You're talking the corn you eat long ways. Exactly. So the corn, what am I saying? So I went to look like corn. So this is wicked.com. This just looks like it's a, well, no, no, this is definitely corn, but it's like movie corn.
You know what I'm saying? Like, I'll be honest, this whole corn versus corn thing, it's kind of confusing. No, it's kind of confusing. There's no food corn. It doesn't, like, so I'm looking at your screen. I see nothing grotesque. Yeah, there's no, because, look, they have a movie. They make movie posters, like something the asylum would make. Yeah, like, this one's called Reckless, and the poster looks like a...
like Fast and the Furious, but it's a corn. So I'm assuming they're racing cars and... Wait, why would you call a knockoff corn version of Fast and the Furious reckless? Call it deep and moist. How is that a play on words? Rapid. Rapid and sensual. There's so many better. Those so far are both worse. The ass is curious. What? What does that? What does that even mean? Starring Vin... Vin Gasoline.
Because he pumps you full of gasoline. Okay, you just get horrible. It's crazy. This one says blast from the past. That's a pretty good. It's a real movie. Oh, it's about a what's the one Michael J. Fox?
Back to the Future. Oh, I thought you were saying someone in it has Parkinson's or something. No, no, no. No, Blast from the Past. I think Blast from the Past is a legit movie. Is it? Unless I'm mistaken. It's starring like... Well, he's got a flannel and a vest on, so I assumed it was... Well, yeah, it's probably Blast from the Past. Oh, if you scroll down, there's... Yeah, Blast from the Past. It's Brendan Fraser and Alicia Silverstone. I knew it was a real movie. Does he have a video camera? Christopher Walken's in it, so...
Pretty close to being sensual. Yeah. A naive man comes out into the world after spending 35 years in a nuclear fallout shelter. I guess. Well, these people make actual... Nope, there's a girl spitting on each other now I'm seeing. All right. That's different. See that?
I mean, it just looks like their tongue is out. I don't see any... I mean, what's that? That looks like it is now... Their tongues are out and there's spit connecting their tongues. So this website was on the packaging to like their dolls? A doll, bro. Like, for the Wicked movie? For like, yeah. It's like Alphaba and motherfucking Korn website right on the front there.
How many kids do you think went to this? I will say this isn't a bad. This is not. I mean, it's not the worst corn site ever. They can go to which would be.
I don't know, something XXDeepImpact.com or something. I don't know. Some shit like that. It's also a movie, Deep Impact. My dad's favorite movie. My dad loves When the World Ends. Deep Impact or Armageddon? Which one are you watching? Armageddon, dude. Steven Tyler. You hate the love story in that. Are you kidding me? Bruce Willis? Liv Tyler? Don't want to close my eyes? Animal Crackers? Matt Damon. Ben Affleck.
Owen Wilson. Matt Damon's not in it. Ben Affleck's in it. Yeah. Steve Buscemi. Steve Buscemi. Owen Wilson. Michael James Duncan. Michael Clark Duncan. Michael Clark Duncan. When they get into it where he's like...
I don't wanna miss one smile. I don't wanna miss one kiss. I just wanna be with you, right with you, just like this.
That song is crazy. A lot of people, this might be a little tidbit of trivia. One of our first videos we did together was pantomiming that song, like doing a performance of that song. You're on the drums and I'm on the guitar. Yeah. And you at one point actually hit a cymbal and it scared the shit out of me. There's a clip of that in the promotional tour before our first show. And I think during...
Think it's been used in other pieces of promotional like the the maybe like the radio the radio city like getting it like when we oh Yeah, yeah, yeah, look at that man. Wait, so kids were just looking up corn because of wicked Yeah Mattel's packaging for its latest dolls came with a wicked mistake the ink the link printed on the back of the toys box led to a corner graphic website prompting dolls all over the country to be pulled from the shelves and
Big, big mess up, Mattel. Big mess up. Wait, what's the... I mean, there are certain conspiracy theorists in the middle of West Virginia that are like, you think this is a mistake? You think it's a mistake? Balenciaga! Damn toys, too! You think this is a mistake? And guess who's running it? Hillary motherfucking Clinton. That bitch is bad. That bitch is bad. Lock her up! Dump her! This is crazy, though. You don't do that. I mean... Wait, what's the real website? What's the real website? I don't know.
Like that's I mean that is oh, it's it's wicked movie.com. It was just was just sound like close You know what? That sounds like you close. It sounds like you know what they shave at that move. Yeah, that's your wicked move Well, it sounds like a Boston like website where you could illegally watch movies like you know wicked movies or it's just like the most Boston person you've ever met that's like a movie reviewer and they're just like welcome back and
I got my Cruella. I got my Duncan. We're going to watch this wicked movie. Wicked movies. Yeah. Come watch us. That sucks, dude. Yeah, not good. Not a good thing to be doing. So, you know, leave the pornographic stuff off the toys. Yeah. Oh, big lawsuit coming. Unless it's an adult toy. I will say this. I will say this. Whoever bought those dolls, they're like instantly collector's items now.
Yeah, if you're a freak. I mean, people do that shit all the time. Also, if you're that website, you're probably like, where did all this traffic come from? What is going on? Whoa, big uptick. Now we can make our next 10 Batman porn movies. You idiot. You're getting fined. Where it's called The Hung Man. I'm not good with my... Frank, we can tell. We do have some sponsors for...
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What do you think that lawsuit's going to be? Big lawsuit. Big ol' lawsuits. Yeah. You know? Yeah, dude. Yo, you know what has just been inundating my feed lately? You ever seen Legal Eagle?
Who? You don't know the legal eagle? Legal eagle. Legal eagle. Eagle. He's like a guy that does like, he's like a lawyer influencer, but just like breaks down like different laws and stuff like that. No. Dude, I feel like I've gone to law school now from watching this guy. This is, by the way, the freest of free plugs. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. You know? When he just talks about like, here's the law. He's just like, oh, so-and-so is suing Joe Santagato. Let's break it down. And like, why? And it's just like, this guy's fucking... And it makes me... Because you know me. Yeah. Blind confidence that I can do anything with little to no training. Right. Or connection to reality. I now feel like I can be my own lawyer if I needed to be. Hopefully you dream about that tonight instead of shutting off your alarms. That was bad, dude. Yeah. Now I have to commit to... Like, what if my dreams tell me to like...
Go home and just eat a half a pound of prosciutto. Mm-hmm. You know? Mm-hmm. What do we do then? I don't know. I hate those dreams. I hate those dreams too, right? Yeah, yeah. You getting ready for Thanksgiving? Oh, yeah. And this is it. Thanksgiving is great because it's prime charcuterie board. Dude, we're doing a little thing at my sister's house for our side of the family. Becca makes a fucking charcuterie board. She charcoots the pants off me. Your sister makes a good one too? What the fuck?
Fuck. Listen. You're surrounded by boards. Listen, the women in my life understand the value in a good charcuterie board. It's so good. Guess what? We're doing a Greek one with Greek cheeses and olives and some tzatziki shit on that. You can throw the olives over your shoulder. I will. Over the shoulder, back around into my fucking mouth. I hate olives. I love olives. But this is prime trying to eat like garbagunk season. You know what I'm saying? Garbagunk. Garbagunk. Wait, so what would go on a Greek-
charcuterie board. You got some fruit, you know, you could throw like, you know, like dates on there, some fresh figs. I mean, you're just describing a charcuterie board. What makes it Greek? Greek cheeses. Feta? Feta, Cassetti, Caffa Lo Graviera. Oh, I don't know what any of that is. Exactly. One of them is kind of like almost like a Parmesan, but it's like a hard, stinky little bitch. It's a dupe? It's a dummy dump of a cheese and it's fucking fat and good.
Damn, is he going to put some fucking lamb on there or something? Maybe we'll get some lamb. That's good. Maybe we'll get some lamb. Can you do that? Why not? I don't know. Make it and put like thinly sliced lamb on some crackers?
Whoa, dude, that's fucking crazy. See what I'm saying now, right? By the way, charcuterie boards, I don't like the crackers usually. I don't mind crackers. Melba toast? What the fuck is that? Like bread? Oh, the little ones? Yeah. But I don't like them when they're hard like croutons. I like them when they're crunchy, but then you bite into them and it's pillowy and soft. Like a good... Yeah, like that. But I don't like when I bite into this little piece of bread and it's like, oh, this hurts my teeth.
Yeah, well, maybe just strengthen your mouth. It's not about strengthening, okay? They're bones. You do have a pretty baby mouth. What are you saying? Like, it's sensitive. I have a sensitive mouth. Yeah. What's making you even say that? You always say, like, crunchy stuff bother your mouth. Like, you recently said, like, oh, Crunch Berries, like Captain Crunch and stuff like that. Captain Crunch is, like, infamously known for cutting people's tops of their mouths. Strengthen your mouth.
I can't strengthen my skin. You know what it is? You haven't worked a day in your life. There's no calluses on those hands. And clearly there's no calluses on the roof of your mouth. You ever bit a bagel bite that just destroyed the roof of your mouth, bitch? Of course. It was worth it. Or like a Hot Pocket. Those are fucking dangerous. How have they not been sued?
Oh, you have all those. They have all like the warnings. Yeah. Like they're fucking, it's like a scroll, you know, on the fucking sleeve. I like that shit. I like that it comes in a little sleeping bag that you put in with it and then you slide it out. Well, I don't think it's to like comfort you. I think it's to just like evenly distribute the heat. No, it is. But I think that's cool. I like that. It's like. Damn, it's about that time of the year where I need to have hot pockets and ruin my evening. There's no part of the year where you need to have hot pockets. I think that's just something that you're telling yourself.
Hot pockets on a charcuterie board. Don't disrespect the board. Why? With a fucking hot pocket. Why not? Because. Also, I want to say something about hot pockets. Uh-oh. You got to put more in here, Chief. More pocket in your hot. You got to more. It's all hot and not that much pocket. No, well, the pocket needs to be stuffed. Stuffed your pockets. Stuffed your pockets, dude. But there's like balls of fucking mozzarella cheese, a lot of sauce, and one pepperoni. Yeah. What are we doing here? I will say, I will say, hot pocket.
Pepperoni that bench. Yeah, shove shit in there! You've got a pocket! Shove your whole shit in it! Fill the pocket. And we're not talking corn. Yeah, we aren't. We're talking just good old classic American ingenuity. Yeah. You give us a bread pocket, I'm shoving that thing until it's stuffed with meat. Also, like, you know how they always say that about bags of chips? We open up a bag of chips and you're like, "Bro, I'm paying for fucking 75% air!" I'm gonna say this: Chips, you've had your chance.
Fuck you. Goodbye. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Lays, you're out, bitch. Fritos, they might be controlled by Lays. Wise, you're done, dude. I hate when chips have been fucking around for too long. You had your chance. Honestly, you had your fucking chance, chips. You're done. 2024, enjoy it. 2025 rolls around. Chips, you're gone. We should all take a page out of the book of Cotton Candy because if you ever open up Cotton Candy, right there. He's right there. You open.
The bag of cotton candy? It's right at the front. Like, bro, right here. Eat my shit. We can all learn something from cotton candy. They say, we have a bag. We're going to shove 40 years worth of cotton candy into this little fucking bag. I could fill my pillow with the amount that fits in this amount of a bag. Joey, this is why, like, we have moments like this where we're so in tune. We're in tune. You're so fucking good big business wise. And like, yeah, chips.
You you're done dude. You're done. You're fired. You're gone. You've had your chance fool me once shame on you fool me twice I'm not eating another fucking Dorito. Okay time to time to go like old yeller behind the shed That's the second thing that's getting killed in the behind the shed this episode did old yeller get shot in the head I think so. I don't even know what that is is a bird a dog I'm not gonna tell you I'll let you figure it out for yourself. No problem. I
What was I talking about? Getting cotton candy. Cotton candy and chips and shit, right? And gum. I haven't eaten a chip out of a bag in a while. I eat them out of bowls at like parties. But where do they come from, babe? Yeah, I know. But I'm like, I'm not seeing the bag. So I'm not frustrated. Because the bag angers you. Yeah, yeah. All these brands, they don't fuck around. There's no waste. Gums. Think of gum brands. There's no fucking jokes in a gum package. It's all gum, bitch. Listen, hold on. I do have a gripe with gum.
Orbit. Forget Orbit. Everyone. I open up this little thing and there's a lot of gum. I'm excited the fact that you filled this whole thing up with gum. Are we gluing? I'm trying to pull it out. You're taking the whole inside. You're ripping this thing. Your pink sock in the gum packaging. Exactly. What's that called? I'm prolapsing the anus. And we got to monetize this now. But I'm prolapsing the packaging.
But what can we say for anus that doesn't like upset people Greg Lou gain a Greg Lou gain is left Stop just destroying your Greg Lou gain is or there. I don't want to do it. I'm a good I'm a good man. I like order I like law and rules and respect I don't want to have to absolutely just let this thing have to just walk sideways for a week. I
Because then I'm just, then I'm this. Then Greg Louganis is getting double fingered in my pocket. Also, I'm the type of person that like, I like little things like that to be neat. And now you're forcing me to take it from the middle and it looks stupid. You know what I like? I just want to take it in order. You know what I like? You know what I like? And you're going to, I hope, I hope.
Dear God. Are you praying to a Lord? Finally. Please. Hope that he's on board with me here. I don't smoke. You know that. I don't smoke. I've never smoked a cigarette. Same. You've never smoked a cigarette either. No. I'll tell you this. When Sofia Gigante opened up that metal case and there was neat cigarettes in there.
I won. Almost got me. Yeah. You see what I'm saying? I was right there on board. And I said to Becca when we were watching the episode of The Penguin, go watch it, by the way. Phenomenal show. Phenomenal. I said I was like a vengeance smoke with a neat package cigarette. Oh.
I've never smoked a cigarette and I've never killed anyone, but you could bet your bottom dollar if I've ever killed someone I'm opening up a metal pack of cigarettes and crushing three and guess what when I open it and I see law and order we're Americans We don't know what's gonna happen in this country over the next four years We need some consistency and law and order in our life. So give us that Packagings of gum give it to us. Also. I love that like I
For some reason in movies when it's like very evil people who like kill for no, but if you pull out a cigarette They're so polite. They'll light it for you Like listen, I'm not a serial killer, I don't know why I have to say that but if it's not a pan that's us but but the way that they're so neat like I would be a good
I probably can't say cereal. What do we say for that? Greg Louganis corn. Unaliver. Cereal unaliver. Like they make it look very neat and that's appealing on some of us. I just want to just. Wait, what are you talking about now? Just like. What looks neat? They'll just sit down and they'll be like.
And they'll open their napkin and they'll pick up their fork and their knife and they'll just like... Oh, and then like eat someone's heart. Yeah, like bro, Hannibal Lecter was onto something in his neatness. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hannibal Lecter did a lot of crazy things, but I guarantee he had a nice apartment. Oh my God, dude. Tell me...
Do me a favor. Just think about how organized this guy probably was. Yeah. And then tell me that minus all the cannibalism and stuff, which is big. It's up there with very bad stuff. Very bad, bad. Tell me you didn't want to at least see his study. We didn't want to see his floor-to-ceiling bookshelf and how organized it was. Yeah, yeah. All the pages of every book in his library were like perfectly crisp. I want to see his car. I guarantee there's not a fucking speck of dust in it. Oh my goodness gracious. I...
Orbit, you can do this. We just jumped back to gum. You can do this, Orbit. It's not that hard. Yeah, stop gluing the fucking piece of gum to the side of the packaging. I'm sick of that. Gum packaging is... Let's look at one of my favorite gums, Bubblicious. That's bananas. All right. Let's look at one of my favorite gums, Big League Chew. And you know...
Bigly chewed. That's a bad example. No, it ain't. They just stuff. Actually, they stuff. I will say that. This thing has no waste. You get your money's worth.
You know exactly what you're getting out of Big League Chew. Joey, they were making fun of me. We went golfing. I had a Costco-sized box of Big League Chew in my car. I'm ready because why? The brand knows they have consistent standards to live up to. Consistent. No. Yeah. And not like these dumb chips. I hate this gum, but you know that gum that comes in like the metal little pimp? Like you pop it open and there's gum in there? No. It's like zebras on it.
Oh, it's disgusting. It was from when we were kids. It was called fruit stripe. Oh yes. Yes. That gum is not whack. Not good. Not good. But I liked that. It came in a little metal thing. Get playful gum.
Get some metal. Get some play. How much does it make to... I'm so angry now. I know. How much does it cost? So afraid to cutting into margins. Oh, margins. Oh, our margins. Gum used to stand on fucking business. It used to come in a beeper, bitch. Gun used to mean something. I used to have a pack of gum that people would be like, oh...
You have band-aids? No, bitch. I'm a kid. It's gum. It looks like a band-aid. Now... For some reason, that was weird, to be honest. Now I pull out gum and people are like, what do you have there? A matchbook? I want gum. Frank...
Now that we've brought up band-aids, that's a lot of fun. I love stuff that you stick a part of it on and then you peel the other one off and it goes on at the same time like a little fucking magic trick. Love that. A little too niche. A little too niche for me. You're being a little niche right there, bitch. But you don't know what I'm talking about? I know exactly what you're talking about. I just don't care to contribute to this part of the conversation. Also, how you open a band-aid, love that. We were like, oh,
And you split it apart You feel like it You feel Alright you got me back You got me back Alright You win bitch You open a bandaid And you feel like Jesus You're just like I'm gonna heal so much Oh I feel like I'm like shucking corn Where you're like Oh here's the corn Back to the corn Back on corn Back on corn Corn is everything The food Technically corn is In like everything Technically you know what But not Not High fructose corn Fructose babe What's wrong with you
Come on. Why did I say fructose? Fructose doesn't even sound correct. I don't know why. It doesn't. And like, I don't even know. Like, you should know that that's not the production. Fructose. Yeah. I said fructose.
Fruc-toast. I'll say this. Fructose sounds like a 90s kid's breakfast. That sounds awesome. It comes frozen with strawberry jam on top. It has carcinogens in it. What the fuck is happening? You're completely gone. I'm falling apart. You're completely gone. Yeah, I can't. Come back, baby. I'm here. But I do like to open Band-Aids. I'm fine with Band-Aids. And a big fat Band-Aid. I like those too.
The ones that are like circles? I like the band-aids, the like waterproof ones that are like foam. They're see-through? Yeah. Yeah, bro, those don't go anywhere. I know, dude. You ever put a band-aid on like your Achilles and like a week later you're like, oh, fuck. Yeah, I forget band-aids often. That's so disgusting too because I would almost not – I would almost rather find a log of shit in a pool than a band-aid. Finding a band-aid on a pool is disgusting. Yeah, dude. Yeah, absolutely. I'm with you there. You're like –
I will say this. A while ago, we did a Bean Boozled video for San Diego Studios. The worst one, people would be like, oh, the worst one is puke or dirty dishwater or spoiled milk. The worst one was used Band-Aid. By far the worst one. I ate the puke one and that one's pretty bad. No, you didn't have the used Band-Aid. I remember it was either pomegranate or used bandage. I love pomegranate.
It was not. Do you like the smell of Band-Aids? A little baby bit. I don't. But I wouldn't eat it. You know what I really like? Ace bandages. I used to wrap my arms up for no reason. Joey did do that. I remember that. I used to just grab it and be like... With no... Like, just no scientific, like... No. Reason or knowledge on how to properly... It was probably damaging. Let's be honest. I remember I legitimately...
When I got my knee surgery, I needed like a spandex. Yeah. Like that. And I had like a big one. This thing was like a carpet. Yeah. Okay. And I remember I was, they were like, you know how to put this on? I was like, yeah. And I went to put it on and they, they like stopped me like quickly. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Like I had my finger on the nuke button. Yeah. And they were just like, you're supposed to wrap.
Like if it's your knee, you're supposed to wrap above and below it. Yeah. Not your knee. Going across the knee. Because then I'm just crunching my knee together. Yeah. Oh man. I used to love doing that. There was always that kid in high school that would show up with like an ace band that was like hurt, you know, just for sympathy. They had crutches and they were just like, oh,
Slid too hard. You know people that were faking injuries with crutches? Not faking injuries. It's a thing that people like... Everyone knew that kid that always had like an ace bandage or like... I imagine we were out of high school at the point this came out, but like kinetic tape and stuff like that. Like they were always hurt. I did do that once with a brace on my hand. What? I forgot. Like I like...
I don't even know if this is an actual injury, but it felt like I jammed my wrist. Oh. Because I fell and my wrist was hurting. So I was like, oh. And so I had my mom take me to the store and I wore this brace that keeps your wrist straight. I know what you're referencing. So I used to wear that in school and just be like, I don't know. I'm just hurt. Oh, I had legit braces for legit injuries. Yeah, I know. Dude, I was- You were crutched up. I was the king. I had a key for the elevator in my high school.
I was living it up, baby. Did you ever give anyone a free ride? I'm sure I did, knowing me. Just knowing me. You're like, girl, I'll just be like, yeah, I got this. Don't walk. You shouldn't walk. You're too pretty to walk. I can only be a gentleman this way right now.
What does that mean? Like I couldn't walk them to class. But I'll elevate you to class. Were you like... I'll walk you to class? Yeah. Did not have time. Oh, really? I had a really... It was a big high school. My junior and senior year, I was so like in close with all the staff at my school that like I could be in the hallways with other people and maybe get in trouble and I'd be like, cool. Crazy. I walked into... It was my junior year of high school.
There was a girl that I liked and I just, in the middle of her class, just walked into the class and handed her a lollipop. The teacher was just like, what are you doing? Handed her a lollipop? What are you, Willy Wonka? The fucking,
Did you say anything? I found out one thing about her, and it was that she liked a very specific lollipop. Which one was it? You remember. I know you remember. Strawberry blow pop. That's a good choice. She's got good taste. Is that the best one? Watermelon. Watermelon. Watermelon, cherry. Strawberry's up there, though. Watermelon, cherry, strawberry, grape, green apple. I didn't love that. And then there's the big fat ones. Remember that they had? They were like the... Double pop. Yeah, it was like... Double chunk. Chunky pop.
I wonder if he does that. If the Costco guy's dad, it bleeds into the rest of his life. He's like, honey, are you feeling all right? You've been in the bathroom for a while. He's like, I got a double chunk chocolate shit. Chocolate poopy. Yo, the Rizzler liked our video. Did he? We're in. I mean, we're in, dude. Yeah, we're locked in. To the Illuminati, because that's where he's going. Is he? He has, he must. Where are you going to go? I mean...
He's just, it's too hot. Let's get him in here. We'll give him the pieces necessary to defend himself well against Baby Gronk. He's got a father, so I think. You know they're not related, right? Baby Gronk and Baby Rizzler? No. Well, yeah, I think you're. Also, when we post that, there were so many people in the comments like, I don't know what's going on. Yeah.
But no, the Rizzler kid is not related to... The Costco guys. Yeah, I know that. I'm very tuned into the Costco-verse. Okay. All right? I know about everyone. I know about Jersey Joe. I know about all of them. Jersey Joe. Okay? Jersey Joe. Yeah, Mama Justice is in there. I'm very keyed. I'm dialed into the Costco-verse, okay? Honestly, shout out to Jersey Joe, man. Honestly, just going to say this, borderline insulting, we haven't been invited to at least dip our toes into the Costco-verse.
BOOM! Dude, you know how big a boom that the basement boys would bring? Boom the roof off that whore. What boom? A basement boy boom? You nuts? A double basement boy boomerific boom! Yeah. That's mad funny. Dude, we would be... Yeah. We have talked about... I haven't even been to Costco in years. We've talked about this family too much over the last four weeks. By the way, just to clue anyone in...
We don't know them. We don't know them. But they're like, there's these two kids. They're like 11, 12. Yeah. And they make videos with their dad. Or one of them makes a video with their dad in Costco and they like write stuff in Costco. Yeah. And it's like kind of wholesome. But there is this. For now. We're waiting for the 30 for 30 to come out. Yeah, yeah, exactly. We're waiting for the Demi Lovato produced documentary about it. Did you watch that? She made a documentary? About child stars.
Might want to watch. Might want to watch. That was a hard pivot there, buddy. Was it about her? It was about her. Christina Ricci's in it. Kenan Thompson's in it. Christina Ricci? Yeah. She was a child star. I know. I just, I didn't. Is it about like the dark side of? There's some stuff in there. There is. There's some stuff.
Hollywood's a horrible place Keep the Rizzler And uh Fucking Yeah protect the Costcoverse Yeah yeah You know We don't need Costcoverse We don't We wanna protect it It's pure When was the last time You went to Costco Not that long ago Within the last calendar year I would say I I I haven't been in a long time Well I'm not allowed I'm not a member
Love Costco. If I had to go buy a TV, I'm going to Costco though. Okay. I mean, or go and get the abundance of other stuff that they have. Yeah, I know. They have everything. Really cool business model too. Chicken is a loss leader. Gets people in the door. It's good quality chicken. Chicken is a loss leader? Yeah, chicken is. There's something in the retail world known as the loss leader where basically they underprice something in order just to get more people in there. And then while they're in there, you can increase basket size and stuff like that.
God damn. I remember baby target boy. I'm coming back. I'm coming back. I my eye doctor was there. That's sad It's crit. How is that sad get a real eye doctor, dude? Well now I don't I still don't actually where do I go? Oh, I have my bro. I am in my 30s If I need more contacts, I gotta call my mom like take me to costco. Oh So we got a nice little plate. No, but you know what? Don't don't your mom probably likes that a lot She probably likes and when you're there does she offer to buy you stuff?
No. Yeah, you're too rich. She's so smart. Liz, you're very smart. Buy me shit. She saw your $40 million house that you sent her. That's why. This is a new rumor that you want to start that I'm looking at $40 million. You have a $295 million valuation. Yeah, I wish. That'd be nice. That would be really nice. That would be nice. Why am I just repeating that? That would be nice. It would be nice to have Washington on your side. Oh, see, I don't even know that song.
That was good, though. Gotcha, baby. But yeah, man, shout out to... Yeah, that was so funny you said Jersey Joe, though. Is that like a hometown hero for you guys? No, fuck... Well, I don't know. I don't want to talk shit. He could dance really well. He might beat the dog shit out of me, too. The guy could... He could move. People that dance that well probably can also fight well because he can do like a split and like Johnny Cage punch me in the nuts. Have you ever watched the UFC? Like, I don't...
There's like, bro, I got to, I'm telling you, man, they're, they're, he's got it. The Costco verse though. They're, they're growing, man. They're like the NWO at this point in time. They might fucking. Yeah. I feel like, uh, but isn't it crazy how the internet can just create these stars now? Yeah. We're like, you know what I'm saying? For like a niche thing. Did you see fucking Hawk two, like hard launched her boyfriend and he's like, what? Blowing up now. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Yeah.
That's great. We are truly in the end of times, folks. The sentence you just said. Dude, Hawk 2 just hard-launched her boyfriend, Pookie. Yo, dude, did you hear that? Hawk 2 hard-launched her boyfriend, Pookie. Yeah. This is what...
I'm interested to hear what fucking the Costco verse has to say about that. Yeah, right. You know, and now... We give Pookie a... Oh, no. Oh, maybe they do give him a doom. I don't want to give him a doom. I don't know the guy. But you're being the AJ, you know? Boom. I'm just telling you now, man. Crazy. Just look out. We've spoke nothing but good things about them. We have maybe suggested that maybe there's a little bit of darkness there, but everyone's got a little.
You know? He's a pro wrestler too, you know that right? Current? He was like an indie wrestler and like he's gonna be- Oh yeah, you told me that. Yeah. Dude's gonna be wrestling. He'll fuckin' hit me- he'll- Definitely put him on like WWE. Well no, he's doing a match with AEW. Oh. Yeah. Wow. Dude, and then bring out the Rizzler and just uh- The Rizzler like fuckin'- He's like- And he's like- Yeah. That's it, that's it. That's all you need to do. That's all you need. That's the move. Man.
I'm exhausted. The double chunk chocolate moonsault! Yeah. Yo. What a world we're living in. It's fun. I'm just saying now, if we don't get a call from the Costcoverse, we're starting our own. I mean, you put it out there. The bait's in the water. The bait is in the water. Can the shark smell the blood is what we were wondering.
We don't know. We don't know. We don't know, but we're going to find out. We shall. But thank you guys for hanging out. I assume we're done, right? Go check the show out at The Basement Yard on all forms of social media and on Patreon at patreon.com slash The Basement Yard. You get more of us. You can get more of us early. You can get more of us. We're planning to do some stuff. Joey dropped some little hints. If you're a patron, you might have heard something that's a little big at one of the end of the episodes. So go check it out. Thank you so much. You can find me at FLvers8085 on Twitter for...
As long as the world continues to turn, I guess. And then me, Frank Alvarez, and all the forms of social media. Love you, babies. And you guys can still go get some of that tour merch at tbytourmerch.com. So get it while you can. And you guys can go follow me at JoeSanagato. And go follow the show at TheBaseMirror on TikTok and Instagram. And that is all. See you guys next time. Boom! That kind of scared me.