#482 - We're Going To Space Camp
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You have the floor is yours. I have to be honest. I, over the weddings I've been to over the last several years, I haven't heard that. Me neither. But I wonder, and I'm sure someone in the comments is going to let us know the story. Like, I wonder if there people have actually objected and not for like a stupid reason, you know, like I object. I love, you know, like a joke, like you got it. Oh, like a legit, like, no, like, I don't think this should go through. I, I've, I mean, see, I don't,

Don't want this to happen at a wedding that I'd actually be at But like like I don't want that to happen to anyone that I know unless it's like a very fringe friend I mean, but then you're not going to go and break, but then you're not going to their wedding though. I'm definitely not gonna not go I how about this how about this? Yes, you know I've been really stressing how business minded I've been lately. What if it's a service and

That you can hire someone to object at your wedding if you don't want to go through with it, but you're just too afraid. You know what I'm saying? So, like, say, like, you and I are getting married, and I don't want to marry you. Yeah, right. Fucking bitch. Yeah, right. Bitch, you would want to marry the shit out of me. You'd be over there being like, oh, no, I have to hire a service? Get the fuck out of here. No, no, no, you're wrong. Don't fucking start me down this fucking road right now, bitch. Which road? The road of anger. Yeah. Anger road. Yeah.

Rocky Road. Rocky Road. Overrated ice cream, by the way. Sorry. Move forward. Yeah. No, we'll get back to that. But you're right. And like you can hire them as a service and they'll just show up to your wedding and object. And you should be like, well, they objected. We need to take a break. Hold on. Everyone chill. We need it. You know what? You bring up some really valid points. Yeah. Yeah. And then just move on. Or just like I'm so distracted. I can't right now. That could be. And they can call them the wedding crashers.

You probably wanted some like trademark stuff. We're okay. We're okay. Yeah. Tell me that doesn't sound like a good idea. I mean, there's something out there, right? You could just also not go through with your wedding if you're not feeling it. Yeah, but also sometimes people have like confrontation anxiety and stuff like that. Sure. So instead of just being that

in the relationship, you can just say like, you know what? You make some really great points, random person I've never seen until right now. Were you nervous on your wedding day? No. Not about like marriage. I'm being like, just like, oh, I mean. It was all backwards with us. We had a really beautiful like little wedding in the backyard, but like I, and Becca and I have talked about this. She was like, so tell me, like, were you nervous when you were going to propose? I was like, no. And she's like,

She wanted you to be nervous. Kind of. She was like, be excited, anything. You're like, no, I was good. It was fine. Well, no, I said that. I explained to her and I personally feel this. I know everyone's different, but I was just like,

I didn't feel nervous because there was no part of me that didn't know that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. Spend the rice. Spend the rice of my life with you. Right. You know? Share your rice. There was no part of me that was just like, oh man, like, do you want to do this? Because like that's, in my head, that's what I equate nerves to. Like I have nerves about something if I'm unsure if I want to do something or I'm unsure of the outcome. It's, yeah. I mean, I...

Also, getting, like, proposing and being not, like, 1 million percent sure is crazy work. Well, I don't know how anyone does stuff like that. Well, some people do it because they think, like, this will save everything, you know? Dude, one of the dumbest things I could even conjure up right now. Guys, listen. But what I think Beck is talking about is not, like, a nervous of, like—

I'm scared to do this or I'm like nervous. I don't know what to say type of thing But just like in it like a like a like a giddy like a butterfly. Yeah, I was I mean I was excited for shows I get like nervous like I'm gonna get nervous see that's the difference is I don't I don't believe those two things are like one in the same I don't think those are nerves. I think that's like an anticipation. Yeah, it's like my anxious. What am I doing? I don't know honestly You're Goku in that shit up right there. I'm going crazy

Just gotta... Yeah, I don't even know what I just said. I don't even know what I said. No, I don't equate those things to nerves. Like, because I also get that before the show. Yeah. But, like, my mentality before the show is just, like... I have no reason to be nervous because it's... Like, the show is about to start. So, like, what am I gonna be nervous about? I just want it to be here already so I can do the thing that we enjoy doing. Same thing with proposing and marrying Becca. It's like, I don't believe it is nerves because...

As an individual, I'm nervous about things that I'm uncertain of or if I don't know, like, the future is clouded. Like, I don't know what's going to happen. Or you don't know where the bathrooms are. Yeah. I hate that. Oh, my God.

Oh my god. God. Can't have that. I gotta say, we did a shoot recently and someone poorly explained where the bathrooms were and I panicked for a minute, okay? Also, I went to the bathroom during that shoot and they gave me the same directions and I walked out and then I, luckily I saw it immediately. The rooftop. I was like, that is so not the directions I would have given. He said, make a left at Produce. The whole store was Produce, guys.

The whole place that we were at was brooded. Yeah. But yeah. So I see that as anticipation, but, but I do, I know there are people out there that, that have nerves like, Oh my God, what is it going to happen if we get married? And then we could, they could hire us for a flat fee of a thousand dollars. Sure. Plus travel and lodging.

Lodging. Yes. You know? Yeah. Yeah. And then we can, we can, we can say, are you saying we like, we're going to go do that? Well, no man is an Island. That is one of the rules of wedding crashing. Okay. Remember that poster that we all had when we were douchebag kids? I didn't have it. I,

Probably did. No, I don't think I did. I know one of our... Did you have a poster in your college dorm of a girl? No, no, no, no. You would have... Honestly, it was the other end of the spectrum of all my posters. Yeah, it was probably like Derek Jeter. No, no, no, no. I can remember my posters very, very clearly. Go slow. Give me one. I'll give you three. Okay. Go slow. Okay. One was a Batman comic book cover. Frank. Frank.

You had a poster in your college dorm room. That's amazing. Okay, what was the other one? Another one was Dexter Morgan putting his glove on. So just so we're all on the same page. Just so we're all on the same page. The girl bending over and grabbing beer or like holding, you know, two beer steins with her fucking cleavage out. So I'm like, I'll have two of those. Those were not on my wall. It was Batman and...

Dexter Morgan. Yeah. From the show. Wait, what was the third one?

Also, you don't have to say this because I already know that your personal sports jerseys were stapled into the wall. They were pinned into the wall. Pinned into the wall. I'm sorry. But his own jerseys were hung up like a Hall of Fame. Yeah. I put my own jerseys in the Hall of Fame. You probably had some newspapers of the Yankees up there. No, no, no, no, no. That was just in your bedroom at home then. Yeah, that was just one entire wall of my bedroom at home. And your Don Quixote posters. Those were cool. I liked those. Yes, yes.

And then, uh, the other one was, I think I've told you this. It was a big one. It was my first year. I can't remember the other years, but it was, um, uh, Pulp Fiction. It was, uh, Uma Thurman. No, no. It would make sense if it was a woman. What was it? It was fucking John Travolta, Samuel Jackson holding the gun at the guy.

Shoot. Did he look like a bitch? Yeah, exactly. Oh, man. That was, you know. That's awesome. Because you only saw my room like three or four times. Yeah. It was very college dorm-like, you know. Like I had like two bowls and three forks that I stole from like the on-campus dining. There you go. And it's all right. It's all good. I have to ask you something seriously here. This is not a joke. Oh.

Someone made a comment to me and I need your help. I think I think you are more in You're more fingering the pulse in terms of like trends and What's so funny fingering the pulse again? Is that not what it is? No, we've gone over this but it's it's finger on the pulse. Okay, whatever Yeah, I'm fingering whoever's getting fingered right our skinny jeans really out of style. I

Yeah. Yeah. It's time, Frank. Because I wore skinny jeans yesterday. Yeah. And someone said to me like, hey, don't let anyone tell you skinny jeans are out of style. And you burst out laughing. Well, the reason why is because before...

You had your phone in your pocket. Yeah. And I could see the cameras of your phone through your jeans. So I was like, dude, we're going to have to size up a little bit. I like form fitting clothing. Yeah. It really like. You could still have a. It accentuates my thunder. And you're. Yeah. Yeah. Stormy over there. Hell yeah. It's a fucking. Damn right, bitch. It's a cloudy thunderstorm over here. Yeah. Here we go. I'll thunderclap it all day. Jesus Christ. Yeah. It's got a little. Thunderclap is wild stuff.

But they're really out of... Yeah, they are. So what's in style for pants? The baggier sort of thing. But you don't have to go baggy. I don't like baggy though, dude. I don't. You're like... I like... Like your pants right now, they're not baggy. Maybe a little bit. They're a little baggy. A little boot cutty. Boot cutty? Yeah, boot cutty baggy. Well, like I can't do like a bell bottom. Like a wide...

I look like an idiot. I just got rid of jeans that I realized were bell bottoms after having them for several years. Did you wear them? Yeah. I didn't see them. I wore them. You know what's funny is I wore them when we went to Austin, Texas for my bachelor party. There's a picture of me and you sitting in a chair. You wore them then? And I didn't realize, and one of our friends commented on it like, is Franky wearing bell bottoms?

That's great. I was like, oh, fuck. Shit, shit, shit. Let's get rid of them soon. Yeah, we'll figure it out. Anyway, there was this thing I wanted to talk about. I just found it on Twitter literally before we started recording. And it's the Department of Air Force. Mind you, I... Wait, the Department of Air... So the Air Force? Yeah, the Department of the Air Force sent out a letter saying,

And I don't know if this is real, but we're going to assume it is because ha-ha-hee-hee. Ha-ha's and hee-hee's, baby. But it says, like, it's been brought to leadership's attention that some individuals are using language that is inappropriate in the work environment, blah, blah, blah. Basically, they made a list and it says, leadership does, however, realize the importance of open, honest communication between members. With this in mind, leadership has compiled the following substitution list. Wait, oh, so basically what they're saying is that, like, people are using words that...

People are complaining about so here instead of those use these yeah, so they have the old phrase and then the new phrase that they want Yes, yeah, so I'm gonna let you come up with something new maybe maybe you like me that yeah, okay And if you do get some right then you know that you're on the same wavelength as someone who works over the Air Force Yeah, honestly when people think of bravery they think of the Air Force and me right? Yeah

The first one just says, no fucking way. That's the old one. No fu- Come on, that's a good one. Yeah. But they want a new phrase. So it's like a polite way to say, no fucking way. No fucking way. Like, go on, giddy up. I think you're misunderstanding the game. I'm gonna be mad at this.

I'm gonna be real bad at this You're not creating a phrase I mean you're not necessarily Creating a phrase You're like What's the appropriate way To say no fucking way While you're at work No way Right no it is It just says I'm not certain that's feasible

I'm going to tell you right now. Yeah, I've never... If someone drops a feasible on me in like casual conversation... I don't like that. No fucking way I don't beat the dog shit out of them. Disgusting. Next one, you've got to be shitting me. These are real good ones, Joey, especially when you're in the Air Force. I imagine you have to say this stuff all the time. You've got to be shitting me. You've got to be shitting me. All right, well... What does that translate to into normal language? Oh, so I would just think like you've got to be kidding me, but clearly they want it to be like...

The, you know, instances that have been brought before us are at a point where they are, you know, seem to be humorous and making a joke and mockery of this entire situation. They just have, really? That's what they have. Then this one. Really? The next one is so good. Tell someone who gives a fuck. That is so good. I haven't said that in my life ever, and I'm gonna. I have to be honest. Tell someone who gives a fuck. Oh, God. I gotta be honest with you.

The moment we, like, as a society, because everything, whatever's old becomes new again. I mean, look at what happened with, like, vinyls. Vinyls came back in a big way. Baggy pants? When flip phones start coming back into the stratosphere, I am going to fucking just emotionally charged hang up on people all the time. Even in the middle of, like, a kind, beautiful conversation, they're getting a, tell someone that gives a fuck.

Bang! Slamming it. Oh my god. I'm gonna bring back payphones so I can flip out on one and slam the fucking phone. I... We've already spoken about the fact that we are in transition into a new studio. Should we get a payphone? You told me... Well, sure. But also, you also told me that a relic of episodes past might be coming back. Maybe. People might be excited about that. That thing is gonna get beaten into oblivion if it does. I'll take that. Tell someone who gives a fuck translates to perhaps you should check in with...

Whoever. Whoever the fuck cares. Then ask me if I give a fuck, which translates to, of course I'm concerned. I'm concerned. Wait, ask me if I give a fuck? Ask me if I give a fuck? But that doesn't line up. Of course I'm concerned. That doesn't make sense. Of course I'm concerned is like confirming that you're upset about something, where ask me if I give a fuck, you're basically saying I don't care. That doesn't make sense. When did the Air Force become no fun? This one just says, fuck it, it won't work.

And then it says, I'm not certain we can implement this. Yo, there is someone. I hope this is real. Why the fuck didn't you tell me sooner? I'll try to schedule that. Oh, God. I got to say. This one just says, eat shit. Oh. Eat shit turns into, you don't say. That's not what those two things mean, Mr. Air Force. Next one. Eat shit and die.

You don't say, please kill yourself. It just says, excuse me. Then it says, eat shit and die, motherfucker. Then it says, excuse me, sir. What the fuck do they want from me? Kiss my ass. Fuck it. I'm on salary. Shove it up your ass. This job sucks. There's no way this is real. There's absolutely no way. Blow me. Turns into, I see. Blow yourself. Do you see? Do you see?

That's awesome. Blow yourself. Do you know how bad I wish? Another fucking meeting. Another fucking meeting. What would you do if you were a professional in the workplace and you got a memo with all this stuff on it?

Printed out immediately sent to the group chat, dude One of my favorite moments when I worked in college was we had to do I think I've told this story before but just in case I'm gonna tell it again we had to do like Conduct hearings where like if people were in like an argument or something or like someone got you know Like written up for violating something depending on the severity of whatever it was. We had to hand out the punishment mm-hmm there was one where like it was like a full hearing and

And someone had to like read the text messages and the person had printed and framed the text message. And it was just like, hey, please stop. It literally to I still have it. It was like, hey, please stop locking the door. And the person just responded like, hey, please stop being a fucking cunt. Wow, that's fire. This serious room of someone having to read this to a room of people. This is not right. This is. Have you ever called someone a cunt?

I'm sure I have. Why are you sure of that? I mean, I'm sure I have. You're a cunt. You've done that? Maybe not to their face. Maybe just like, oh, that person's a cunt. But it feels bad. Cunt is so sharp. You could cut right through a conversation. It really can. It feels like a word that the person can hear even if they're not around. It feels like in 30 years, we're going to look back at this and be like, we said that? You know what I mean? Yeah. You know?

It's kind of like when you shoot a gun in the air. You don't really think about it, but, like, it's got to come down. You ever think about that? Yeah, I quite... Do people die like that all the time? There have been instances. Mythbusters covered that in an episode where, like, someone just, like, randomly shot in the air because it goes up and then it comes down. Hard. Just as fast. Also, is it true if I throw a coin off the Empire State Building, like, I'm going to kill a motherfucker? No, but...

That one is pretty cool. Like I heard it was like if someone throws a coin and you try to catch it, it'll go through your hand. I heard it'll go through the top of your head and split you in half. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, damn. That'd be kind of cool. I mean, not dying, obviously. Not the dying part of it. Right. But I mean, how has no one thrown just a bucket of coins off the top of the Empire State Building? It is shocking that no one's done that. I'm saying. We got people getting shot in Midtown. Yeah. Coins off of the top of the Empire State Building just seems like a no-brainer. And I feel like it wouldn't be hard.

I mean to throw a coin? I'm sure they have cameras up there. I don't want to speculate. Yeah, guys, don't do this. Don't throw coins. I'm sure there's a ton of cameras up there that people would see it immediately. I feel like there's not a lot of change left in the city. You know what I mean? No one has coins. I'm okay with that, dude. Me too. I fucking hate coins. Coins are weird. I don't even like cash. I do like multiple coins. Like...

You like shaking coins? I like shaking coins. Okay. But the minute there's just like one or two coins. What's your favorite coin? Half dollar. That's a cool coin. That's a sick. I still have one from like the 60s. Gold dollar. The dollar coins? Yeah, those were cool. Those were pretty cool. Was that Harriet Tubman on that one? I think it was. I was going to say Sigourney Weaver, but that's not true. It's not Sigourney Weaver. Sigourner Truth, I think? No. Dude.

I'm pretty sure it's Harriet Tubman. That might be, it might be. We should just do it quick. Sure. We should do it. Or, or no, who was the other? I think it's Tubbs. No, no, no. I think there was somebody else. I think there was somebody else and it's going to affect me. Uh,

It's gonna... Golden dollar coin. No, there was... The half dollar is like one of the fucking president... Like one of the... It was RFK. Sacagawea. I knew it was. What? Yeah, dude. The front side of the golden dollar coin was designed by Sculptor. Yeah. Wait, so Tubbs is on something. I don't think Tubbs is on anything. What? Dude, an original from year 2000. I remember this.

Like pre-owned on eBay is going for like 1600 bucks Wow I mean there's also other ones going for like $9 so Someone is getting really crazy with that Yeah no I knew it wasn't Harriet Tubman Wow I thought it was Harriet Tubman Sacagawea You remember what she did right?

She did stuff for sure. And you remember? Nope. You don't remember? She was like the guide for Lewis and Clark. Ah! Yeah. Yeah. They were just like, what is this? And she was like, it's a rock. And they were like, got it, Saka. Thank you, Saka. Thank you, Saka. Yeah, I mean, what an interesting thing. Imagine being the first people to see the Pacific Ocean. Same as the Atlantic. I would say half dollar, quarter, quarter.

Quarters are cool. Bro, I fuck with dimes. I really fuck with dimes. Really? Yeah, I fuck with dimes. I don't care for that. Mad dimes. We can agree. The worst is a nickel. The wackest. The wackest. And it's overly fat, dude. And what is that thing? Pennies I like because they're cool. But they make, they're like. Have you heard the conspiracy about pennies? No, what? Where it's like they're the only one that's not silver because like they were mad at Abraham Lincoln for freeing the slaves and that's why he's facing another direction and shit like that.

I don't know how true it is. I don't know how true it is, but it's possible. No, pennies are just like, I don't know. Because whenever you have pennies, it's like they would step down. They're all fucked up. Yeah, a penny to me is basically just like a pigeon. You know what I mean? Like they're useless. They're rats. But I will say, rats. I will say a fresh penny is up there because they're shiny as fuck. Not only are they shiny as hell, but like they're just like, this isn't a real, like where did this come from? Yeah. You ever think

that like yeah where do we get this who just like puts fresh pennies out there and they're just like go be pennies yeah that doesn't make sense well the federal reserve i believe i know i know but it still doesn't make sense right that they could just print it but they can just get pennies how many pennies are there in the world that are just not being used they're like on the ground like on the ground in a ditch did you think i was gonna have an answer to that yeah

In the United States. I would say a whole bunch. Okay. Give me a dollar amount. Not even just pennies. Okay. Just loose change out there. Loose change? Oh, all loose change. All loose change. Bro, lots. But how much? And I'm not saying within a person's like they have it in like a water jug like your family did. Right, right. Okay. Or like they throw them at their son because he got a 98 on his test instead of 100 like my parents did. Right.

Hold on, let's frame this for a clip. Here we go. Bang! This guy, big, big guy. We're directing now. We? You wanna... Okay, Joey. Do you wanna ask the question? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's changed on the ground? You guys are watching it in real time. You guys are watching this in real time. You're seeing how the sausage is made. Hello, here's our sausage. Here's our sausage. Okay, well... Say that. You wanna see some sausage? Look over at Joe's camera. That's enough. Here's the sausage. Cut to Joe. Okay. Hey, Joey, I have a question. You're not gonna start it like that.

Just ask me how much. No, seriously. How much loose change do you think there is in the United States? That's not like in a piggy bank or like a, like a. Just on the ground. Yeah. Just on the ground in the United States. Like maybe close to a million dollars.

Get the fuck out of here. Frank, are you kidding me? A million dollars? People are walking around on the earth. I'm saying, no, brother, no way. In the U.S. In the U.S. I'm saying $100,000 max. No way. Max, dude. Frank. Max. There's $100,000. I can find $100,000 in coins in Central Park. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no. No way, dude. A million dollars. Do you know how many coins you need? That's a lot. Frank, the-

The country is vast. It's big. Forget about like... What about dollars? What about dollars? I was going to say just the gold coins. What gold coins? The gold dollars. What about those? If we're just doing those, there needs to be a million. Oh, yeah. That's not... That's too much, brother. I know, but Frank, coins... Pennies, there needs to be a hundred times a million. Frank, but coins are never alone. You're not going to find... Yes, they are. No, they're not. They're not.

That's literally what they're known for, being just a loan coin. No one gives one cent back. Like maybe a quarter might be a loan because that's a lot of money. Give a penny, take a penny. Yeah, no one does that. Who, but also why would you do that if you just need a penny? I don't get it. And you have a penny. Nothing happens with that exchange. I think there's, I definitely think there's hundreds of thousands of dollars. I say $100,000, max $200,000.

Think about the amount of just, just like forget about the dollar amount. Think of the amount of coins.

That need to be around. Yeah. A hundred pennies in a dollar. Yeah. Times a million, brother. Right. A hundred million pennies just in the ground? Sure. No way. Frank. No way. And we're not talking like pennies from like 1901 that are like more valuable because they use this alloy. No, no, no. But does it count if like some of these pennies are like just in the soil? Yes, that counts.

Definitely a million. No, no way, dude. Frankie. No way. People are out there with metal detectors finding pennies and dimes and quarters all the time. Yeah. At the beach...

How much money do you think is in the fucking ocean? Whoa, dude. I didn't even think the beach. The beach! I didn't think the beach. There's probably tons of money at the beach. The beach and just other stuff, too. All right. United States. Continental United States. So not Hawaii. We'll allow Alaska and Hawaii. If you give me Hawaii. Easily. But from grass to grass. Fuck the ocean and the beach. Okay, okay.

I think $200,000 max. No, no, no. Max. I think there's more. I think there's more. Well, what do they got up in Alaska? They got bear meat, wolverines, and bones. They don't have any change up there lying around. They definitely did. They're a society, Frank. I know they are, but most of them aren't. That's what I'm saying. Who? Most of Alaska is not. Oh, yeah. It's probably, I don't know. It's just bears, dude. Yeah. Bears and snow. Probs. Now.

How much money do you think is in the ocean? And I'm not just saying, now, I'm not just saying like currency and tender. I'm saying like- Tender? Currency and tender. I'm saying like someone dropped like a Rolex into the ocean. Yeah, bro. There's probably so much of that. Yeah. Crazy, right? Think about this, right? Yeah. Think about how much money-

Or how many things are left behind at clubs? Like at the end of the night, they turn the lights on. Yeah, but people aren't leaving behind valuables. They're leaving behind like chapstick and a fucking broken cell phones. People like their chains may be full of their earrings. Like, yo, you find a lot of shit. You know what I remember so clearly? And you might be the only person for this story. Oh God. Do you remember there was a nightclub in our neighborhood growing up called Remy?

Some people may remember it. Some people probably don't. Most people don't. 99.5% don't. Go ahead. There was a nightclub in Astoria called Remy. And I always remember walking along 45th Street, heading toward like 23rd Avenue from Ditmars, and looking in the window and just seeing crusty dollar bills that had fallen behind the benches and shit that were just in the window. And I always thought to myself, like, there's got to be like $30 in there.

in there, which at the time could have bought me a week of having fun. Now that's not a fucking damn thing. But do you ever see those growing up? No, I don't even know what you're talking about. But I imagine that like that happens all the time. There's like money and shit left behind. I can't, I really wish that someone were to hit me up and they would just be like, I buried a ton of treasure. I want like, I really want to find treasure. Frank. No.

No one's going to hit you up. Do you think treasure exists? Of course. And I'm not talking like... We're talking about Davy Jones' locker here. Treasure. Well, isn't that... I don't think that's treasure. I don't think so either. I think that's like a ghosty thing. I thought that was just like the deep blue sea. No, Davy Jones' locker, I think it was just like a place. I thought it was like an expression of like you'll drown in the ocean. Well, that's probably from where you got it from, which is SpongeBob. But Davy Jones...

Locker is... Did I tell you that when I was in Fire Island that a guy... What? You're right. Right? It's an expression. It's an expression referring to the bottom of the sea regarded as the grave of those that have drowned at sea. Davy Jones Locker. I thought it was like a place for ghosts.

Well, I guess technically. All right. So we're both right. No, that's not how that works, buddy. I'd like credit. What were you excited about? Dude, I don't know if I told you this, but when I was in Fire Island, we were like walking to this place and it was so far, but because there's no cars on the island and I was like, bro, I just like whatever. And this dude drives by on a golf cart.

And I just like jokingly was like, oh, you're going to give us all a ride? And he slams on the brakes and he's like, yeah, get on. And I was like, for real? And he's like, yeah. So we get on. This is the most... I love interactions like that. I can't remember what he looked like exactly, but he reminded me of... You ever see the Polar Express? Unfortunately, yes. You know when the kid goes on top of the train and there's that guy who's like homeless kind of?

Vaguely, yeah. Right? He was like that because he looked like he was covered in soot. And he was driving a golf court and we were all on it. And then he starts having a conversation with me. And then he's telling me, he pulls over at one point and he goes, you see that house? And I go, yeah. He goes, underneath that house, if you go all the way down, that's Davy Jones' locker.

And I said, what? He told me that he knew. And I was like, what do you mean? And he's like, it's there. Like, that's where it is. And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? Did you ever fact check where it is? Did I fact check? I thought that guy was a ghost, Frank. I didn't think he was real. Honestly, you might have been talking about like what he got. Probably. I thought it was an old fisherman ghost.

It just says... He was like, there's Davy Jones' locker. And I was like, I don't even know how to take that. It just says the bottom of the seat. I mean, technically, he wasn't wrong. Yeah, I guess. Right? Technically, he's like, if you go underneath this island that we're on... He literally pulled up to a specific house. He said, under this house, you go down, that's Davy Jones' locker. And I was like, that's kind of sick, though. I know. I was like, what the fuck? Can you go under an island? Do the ads first. Do the ads first. Do the ads first. Oh, my God. Yeah, we do have ads to get to here. That...

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The patreon.com slash the basement yard guys, um As we have said on patreon and in some episodes here We're in transition to a new studio and a huge reason why we're able to do that is because the love and support you guys have given Us on patreon. So thank you guys so much Uh, it is truly truly monumental that you have given us the opportunity to make you guys smile and happy and laugh and all that fun stuff and uh now with the new studio we're getting the opportunity to do that and give you guys more of what you love which is a

We'll be right back.

Get them the gift of the Patreon. It's a cute little gift. So do it. Patreon.com slash TheBasementYard. Thank you guys so much for all the love, continued growth. We appreciate it. And we're excited. Bye. Why am I bye? Why am I going bye? I don't know. But so. Hit me. This is a big water themed episode. It is. Okay. Which I don't hate, but I do not like. Right. The ocean fucks me up. Yeah. Can you go under an island? Like swim under an island? Like swim under... Like...

Maybe not Hawaii, because I know that's all volcanoes and shit. But like, let's think of like an island like the middle of the ocean, like... Bora Bora. Sure. Right? Yeah. Okay. Is it like just like a floating island? Sea? Or is it like a, you can go underneath because, I'll be honest with you... Yeah.

Why we should do that? That would be cool. Okay, two things. I mean, not me. I hate underwater. I was going to say two things. I'm never attempting this. No, yeah, okay. I mean, so I wanted to say that you could if you swam deep enough, but that's stupid because obviously you can't swim under an island because then they'd move.

Like Hawaii would eventually crash into something. I didn't think about that. You know what I mean? I didn't think about that. So Hawaii is just connected to the crust of the earth, the mantle. The mantle. That's it. That's it. Yeah. I think it's just volcanoes. That's what Hawaii is. It's volcanoes. I think all islands are volcanoes. I don't even know if that's true. Long Island is not a volcano. Isn't it? No. What is it? I mean, there are parts of it that certainly suck. Like...

Like volcanoes do. But I don't think... I think some of them are just like they broke off. Or like there was space in between and then it just got flooded because of the rising tides. Have you ever been on an island? Like a real island? Long Island, I guess, if you consider that. It's connected to the gods. Yeah. I mean...

No, no, no. Technically, yes, but not for the sake of this argument. Have you? Yeah, two. Well, I went to Mykonos, so that's an island. You're making crazy noises over there. Oh, yeah. But when I went to... Mykonos, that's a crazy... You've been to the two gayest islands. You've been to Mykonos and Fire Island. Those are very well-known gay attractions. Yeah. There was nothing gay about Mykonos when I was there.

Fire Island was certainly gay, though. Yeah, okay. But I told you when we were walking around with Pete, dudes were loving Pete. Well, duh. It was great. I was like, Pete. They are the kids, and he is the candy store. You know what I'm saying? He's taking his shirt off. I'm like, you know what you're doing. He loves it. He likes to play like he hates it. He loves every single second of it. But...

Shit. Oh, when I went to, I went to Azores in it's in Portugal. Yeah. In Portugal. It's such a weird feeling. And I know you especially would feel this way, but like when you're looking out and you're like, yo, I'm, I'm on a fucking Island in the middle of the ocean. And I can't even do you like when you're looking out,

Right? If you get high enough and you look around you, you're like, there's just water. Nah. It's so weird. Fuck that. It really is weird. I'll tell you, on certain flights we've taken, we've gone, like, whether it be, like, when we flew from L.A. to Seattle or, like, the times we've flown, you know, like, the one we went to Puerto Rico. I can't look out the window. Really? I can't because I see nothing but water and it fucks me up. It ruins me. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, like...

You know, these trips that you have done, like, and I know like when you went to, like you booked your trips like to and from Europe based off like red eye flights. That's the only way I would be able to do it because I would be so terrified of seeing

Nothing. Dude, I saw something recently where it was just like this spot on the planet, you're closer to astronauts than you are to any human on the planet. And I was like, that's crazy. I couldn't, I couldn't, that concept fucking ruins me. Yeah, when I was, when we were there on the island, and the island's like a normal place. Like there's like, you know, whatever. But the idea that I would like,

you know, hurt my ankle or something. And it's like, I'm just on a fucking island in the middle of the ocean. Yeah. Like in order to like get, I'm sure if you hurt your ankle, Joe, I'm sure this Island has some form. they do. That's what I mean. But in my head, I just kept saying like, bro, I'm on a fucking island. Like if I get hurt, I got to stay on an Island. But like, honestly though, but like the, the inverse, like God forbid there was like a zombie emergency or something. That's a place you'd want to be. Sure. Because the Island, it's a finite amount of space.

There is a very like finite amount of people on it. You could kill them all if you have to. Jeez. If they were zombies, that's what I mean. Yeah. You know, like how big was, how big was Azores? Uh, this Island specifically was, uh, I think you can get to like the other, I think there's like a hundred thousand people who live there. If you had to get to the other side, you could kill a hundred thousand zombies.

With enough ammo, yeah. But not even just ammo. And a good lookout point? An axe and a good friend. An axe? Yeah. You think I have it in me to axe 100,000 people? Zombies? I'm a bit tired. Yeah, I'm not saying you have to do it all in a row, Joey. Yeah, I know. You can do like 100 a day. Holy shit, dude. You ever swing an axe 100 times? It's fucking hard. No, I haven't. Me neither. I've swung an axe a couple times. I've swung axes a couple times, not 100 times. They scare me, though.

You know what I never understood about that? About like the places that exist where it's like, let's go axe throwing. There's a bar there. Let's throw axes. How did no one go, maybe don't mix those. Don't mix those things. And they have a very specific way of throwing it because they don't want people to go like this and cut their own head off. You have to go like that. We went to an axe throwing place. Yeah, I almost died that night.

Oh, you were sick, right? Mad sick. Yeah. What's your... Yeah, okay. That was seven years apart. Yeah. Yeah, I wonder what the liability insurance for a fucking axe-throwing...

Is it's so stupid. It's not just stupid. It's dumb. It's date You know There's a difference like things could be stupid because like they don't realize how bad they are then when you're dumb It's just like you have no grasp of reality and don't get me wrong This is from someone that's been to an axe-throwing place. Lots of fun. We had fun and I like danger. I

Not a ton, but a little bit. You like danger? That's surprising. I wouldn't take you as a danger-ful guy. Danger-ful? Yeah. I mean, not a ton. I mean, you definitely don't like danger. I'm not a danger guy anymore. I used to be a danger guy when I was more comfortable in the dark than I was the light. Yeah, you were just lying about being dangerous back then. No. You being dangerous back then. At the lake, we did stuff that was dangerous, but, like, not traditionally dangerous. Hide and seek? Uh...

That wasn't traditionally dangerous. It was called Manhunt. Right. You know. I miss Manhunt. Oh my God. I miss playing Manhunt. Dude. Copyright right now. For a San Agato Studios video. Playing Manhunt? We just do a big Manhunt game. And we put GoPros in all of us. Where? We can find somewhere that does like Manhunt games. In a warehouse or something. Or let's do hide and seek in the new studio. How? Okay.

You see, it was at the beginning of this episode where you were like, you know, I've been having really good ideas lately or something. Let's play hide and seek in the new studio. That doesn't sound fun. 33, 33, 32. Yo, we're going to be 33 this year. You recently brought this up and I don't want to talk about it again. That's so disgusting. It is pretty gross. Did we have this conversation recently? Yes, I just said we had it. No, no, no, a different thing. I was prefacing one. But like...

We're 32 years old, right? But I don't feel that. We just had this conversation. Was that on the show? Yeah. Oh, okay. Because that was like... I'm still thinking about that. Yeah. No, like when I remember being 15 years old, this was the crux of the conversation. Being 15 and hearing someone's 33 and be like, wow, they're old. And then it's just like... Old as fuck. I like...

In some ways feel like an 18 year old more than I do what I believed a 33 year old was. Yeah. You know what I mean? I also remember being younger and being like, bro, that guy's like 23. Like I remember saying that it was funny because like that's old. We would be like, I don't know if this happened in your high school, but like, I remember it was a thing that like there would be girls in our high school and be like,

17 years old And she'd be like She's got a boyfriend He's in college He's 22 And I'm just like Whoa whoa whoa Wait a sec Yeah like There was something up there There was definitely In my high school Like sophomore girls Yeah

Who dated dudes who weren't in the school anymore. And I don't know how old they were, but, like, that's weird. I mean, I don't know what the legality is behind, like, if you start dating at underage and then one of the people is just a couple years older. Like 18 and 17? Yeah, like, say, for instance, like, you and your partner start dating at 16 and you stay together and now one is 18 and the other is 17. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, yeah, I mean...

I think in the eyes of the law that you are doing something. I don't know. Honestly, I imagine that there's some form of like parents get involved and they're just like, this is okay. I've heard stories about that happening where parents didn't want them to be together. It's so funny that we would be like, oh, that girl, she's dating a college kid. Oh, shit. You know? And it's just like, we didn't... At the time, we were just like, whoa. And now looking back, like...

Well, I honestly definitely remember being in high school and hearing stuff like that and being like, that's so fucking weird. I dated a girl that was a year older and I was in high school and she was no longer in high school. A year is like that year I think is not like crazy. Yeah, but still, you know what I mean? Like I also knew like, okay, here we go. Yeah. I knew one of our friends had dated a girl that was like eight years older than us. Than us? Yeah.

And so what is she dead now? No, no, no, no. No, maybe not eight, maybe like six or seven, but like older, like, like when they were 18, 17. Yeah. Do I know them? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. So they were dating someone who was, and you'll remember it, bitch. Fucking remember. You'll remember. Yeah, you will. Interesting. Yeah, it happens. Yeah. Weird. Weird. Have you seen the new fetish?

Frank, you don't know how to transition. You don't know how to segue. What was that? Have you heard the new fetish? Have you heard? Are you guys, are you understanding me, young, you know, youth of today? Yeah. Here it is, the new fetish. Hot off the press. Hey, brother. Hey, has anyone here heard about the new cool drug on the street? What?

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So, as I was saying, have you heard of the new fetish? The new fetish? New fetish. No. Apparently there's a group of fetishists out there. Is that what they are? Are we still calling them freaks or are we just moving on to... I mean, I never called them freaks. That was him. Get him. They're into wet jeans. Yeah? Like wet, like piss? Like, I wet my jeans. Ooh, that's a good question. Like piss jeans? I'll be honest, I hope not. Right. I hope not.

Wet jeans sounds not good. Boy, I would be... There have been some car rides where I'd be the sexiest man on the planet if they're into piss jeans. What is it, a flex? What are you trying to say? That you as a grown man piss your jeans frequently? Not frequently. It hasn't happened. I don't pee in my car anymore, Joey. I tell you this. New car, new rules. All alleged. All alleged.

New car, new rules, no piss. Okay. It has happened once or twice on like an emergency basis. But for the most part, I've gotten my piss under control. I love that you said that. What? It's only happened in emergencies. Like...

That means previously you were just doing it for fun. Wasn't it an emergency? He's like, I'll just do it here. No, no, no. That means before I was just trying to be efficient. You know, I've always spoken about this. You like to be efficient. If I am nothing else, I am efficient. And covered in piss. And covered in piss.

How much did they give you for your return to your car? You gave your car and they gave you money, right? Yeah, oh yeah. Too much. Yeah, a dollar would have been too much. It's a piss-soaked car. You never know. Maybe they're into pee. I don't know. I mean, apparently. So you've pissed your wet jeans before? You have wet jeans? I have accidentally pissed. I got pissed on my jeans. Not like on purpose on pissing my jeans, dude. You ever accidentally piss your jeans? What kind of a monster do you think I am? I don't know.

I'll tell you not. Okay. But in that case, just a little hand sanitizer, just rub it in and all is good. Hand sanitizer doesn't stain your jeans? It wets it, but then it dries. I didn't know if it was stained. I mean, I'm not wearing white jeans like you, you faggot.

No, you're... No, the fucking... The wet... The... Oil or whatever would, like, stain. Oil? It's just alcohol, dude. I don't know. It's not oil. I just... I'm not sure. I mean, I'm not getting, like, Bath and Body Works, like, the ones that have, like, scents in them and shit. I'm getting, like... Not that I don't like those. I have, like, Purell, like, the medical shit. I like the ones that have the balls in them. What? You ever get hand sanitizer that has balls in them? I think I have, but I don't... Not big enough that I'm like, yo, look at these balls. I mean, I'm not, like...

It's not like balls. It's like little balls. Like you ever have the gum that have balls? Those are good. I love when I love those. What the fuck was that? I love when I love those.

This kid's losing it right now. I am, honestly. Yeah. No, I do love the gum with the little balls in it. Yeah. But they have hand sanitizer. It's the same thing. It makes me feel clean. Ooh. I have an expensive soap in my house. Ooh. And it has balls in it. Does it have balls in it? Because it's good for... What's that called? Exfoliating. Bang. So it's not balls. That's just like grit. It's like balls. Former... I don't know what's going on with the ads, but...

I always, anytime I get like Dr. Squatch soap, I get the ones that has grit in it. Oh. I love it. It's like a nice little scratchy. I like it. They got Harry Potter soaps. What's that? They're Harry Potter themed soaps.

And it stinks like a snake? They have one for the four houses. I'll tell you this right now. Gryffindor smells great. Slytherin, really great. Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, I'd rather bathe in shit. Okay? I just want to throw that out there.

Not my favorite. Damn. Yeah. Why? Are they too, like, perfumey? They just, I don't like, like, one of them is, like, vanilla. Ooh, I love that. It's too vanilla-y, though, or something like that. Okay. I didn't like it. And the other one, I don't remember. The other one, actually, if I remember, I think the Ravenclaw one just didn't smell like anything to me. I hope they're not still a sponsor of the show. I don't know. We'll find out. I hope they don't watch this one. We'll find out. But, yeah, no, I like exfoliating.

Should we edit out the Dr. Squatch stuff? What? No, no, no. Are you sure? Yeah, we're fine. All right. It's whatever. So it's good. And we like it. Honestly, I really just don't like two of the flavors. I just don't like two flavors. Like I'm eating them. I'll be honest with you. Yes. Don't. But soap looks delicious.

Yeah, I'm big into, oh, there's two types of videos that I love on TikTok right now. Give me them. Give me them right now. Well, like, I hate that, like, I turn my volume down because sometimes it's like people talking and then they put those really cool videos next to them. Oh, yeah. They know what they're doing. Two of them. One when they're like scraping soap.

And it's like a bunch of cubes. It's like they made the checkerboard pattern in it, and then they're just like, yeah, with the knife. And they're scraping soap. Then the other one, dude, which is my favorite. Oh, I think I know. I think I know. Is it like when it's like slime with like a hard shell, and they crack it in their hands? No, but that's not bad, actually. But it's the one where it's like it's a paint roller, and then they take the thing, and they squeeze all the paint off of it. And it's so nice. I love it. I love it. It looks like this, and then they take this like brain. I know what you're talking about. I know what you're talking about. And then they just squeeze.

Yeah. It's okay. I love it, dude. I do love those videos, though. Because I'm always like, this is how they got us. Like, that's how they get you. You know what I mean? Because I don't care what else is in the video. I care about, you know, what this is. You know, a lot of the times it'll be like, you know, like...

Like people just like a callus and they're just like shaving it. Yeah. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I like that. Get that little dirty bitch. I kind of like that. Or the fucking hoof people. I love the hoofs. Love the hoofs. Hoofs. That one tool that guy has where he's like carving it and I'm like, ooh. Oh, and then it's wet. Yeah, but I like it. I know. You like it spitty and pissy. I do like it pissy because when they get down to the hoof and it's like, this one's got an infection and then the infection just squirts at you. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

And I'm like, that must hurt the horse. I don't want the squirt. No, it's relief. And then the guy's like pressing it and squirting. Have you ever had an infection like that squirt? I mean, when you get it cut or lanced or something. No, no. Immediate relief. Oh, it's nice. Because of the pressure. Yeah. I remember when I, you know, I don't know if you know this about me. I bite my nails sometimes. Oh, I know. And when I was in college one time, I bit like a piece of the, like where the nail and skin meet and it got infected and my finger blew up.

And my nail was white. And I went to the like healthcare services on campus. I was like, what is this? And they were like, oh, you have an infection. It happens when people do this. So they literally just like pull the skin and it just fucking, you know, my, my finger felt like a balloon. Do you cut, do they cut it? They just pull it to like separate it because there's so much pressure under there that like,

You kind of, all you have to do is- What'd they pull? Wait, hold up. What? They pulled, so like they literally were just like separating, like extending it. And then there's so much pressure that it's just like, I want out, you know? What'd you do? I watched it rupture and they gave me antibiotics and they said clean it and put band-aids with, you know, like a Neosporin on it and live the dream. Ew, disgusting. Yeah. Yeah, I hate that. But yeah, I like those videos with the paint.

All those types of videos I think are kind of cool. The ones where it's people and they have gym chalk, lifters chalk, and they spray it with paint water and then they just fucking crotch. Yeah, they crush it up. They crotch it. Or you ever see the one where the guy, it looks like he's dealing with icing, but it's like paint. Maybe it's not paint. It's like...

It's like shaving cream. Like shaving cream? Yeah, and they're in a... Is it a cup? No, it's in a bucket. And he's like...

Oh. Like grout. Oh, oh, oh. Is it like, yeah, it's like plaster. Yeah. In a big bucket and he goes up with that spatula. Yeah. And it makes it two lines and then he goes around like that. Hell yeah, dude. But then he like flows all the poop. Oh, he does. It looks like he's pooping it. He shit it. Yeah. He shit it. And I'm like, what the fuck was that, dude? I like that a lot, too. I do kind of, too, honestly. I like, you know what I really like, too? I like watching men lay bricks. Is it?

And I don't mean that in any sort of way other than how I'm saying it. Okay. I mean, when men are... Can I misinterpret it to mean something different? No, it's when they're making a wall. Is it, in particular, underpaid workers, maybe Hispanic ones that you like? No. I know what you're talking about, though. When they throw it on and then they take the trowel and they just, like, fucking, like... Yeah, dude. And they put it on top and they shunned it. Yeah, when they, like, they just take it and they just, like, flop it on the... It's like...

And then the guy's like, you're going to tell me. You're going to tell me. Sick. You don't want to play with like wet cement. Bro, put me in the fucking truck. Yeah. And roll me around in the cement. That would be good. But apparently it's bad for your skin. Cement? Yeah, I imagine it is, Frank. What is cement? It's just rock and water. No way. It's got to be something else. I'm sure there's like other chemicals in it, but like that's the general idea is that like it's just rock and water. No. No.

I asked the question, you didn't give an answer, and then you're like, I'm sure there's other stuff in it. That's my question. Cement is? It's rocks. Limestone, clay, and marl. Marl? I don't know, but I love that. How do you spell marl? M-A-R-L. Like Jacob Marley? Marl.

How is that the example? Like Marlboro. Other materials. Shells, chalk, shale. Shale? Shale, slate, silica sand, iron ore, blast furnace slag. Blast furnace slag. That sounds sick. That sounds like a hooker's name in Ireland. Come here, daddy. Blast orange slag. What was it?

furnace a blast furnace slag that's definitely a slur oh it's gotta be right it has to be it has to be it's like oh this is my girlfriend yeah she's a whore i didn't know there was that many ingredients oh there's more what fly ash what the fuck is that yeah yeah yeah it's crazy they add gypsum

I'm serious. Adding gypsum, a small amount of gypsum is ground up with the clinker to control how the cement sets when water is added. The clinker? I don't know. I feel like I'm being pranked by an article. Dude, when has AI ever been wrong? Yeah, dude. And then you know there's a difference between cement and concrete. Oh, shit. Wait. What did you look up? Cement. Oh.

Concrete, that's more rock. It's a mixture of cement, water, and other stuff. So that's what you're talking about. So I'm right and you're wrong. What you're saying, where I said it was just like rock and water. I knew that much. That's cement. And I was right. And then the added stuff. Frank, you just added 100 ingredients. Frank, there's... Those are all rocks.

Frank. Shale? You never seen those people? That's good videos on TikTok. The people that find the raw rocks, the round rocks, and they're like, there might be an ammonite in here. And he takes a little, he goes, bang! And it cracks open, and it's a fossil. He finds it in shale? I do like that. You ever seen people hammering shale? Yeah, I have. It's so good, dude. I do. Shells. Yeah. That's a rock, kind of. Shells are not rocks. Are shells rocks? No, they're... What is rock? What is shells? Shells.

Wait, what the fuck is shells? I think shells... No, no, no, no, no. What are they? What is a shell? I think it's just like a part of an animal that's like... Was it always a part of an animal? At one point, I imagine it is, and then it's not.

So shells are just abandoned. They're abandoned homes. They're orphans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of animals. Yes. Well, no, because they're not alive. The shell isn't alive. The animal that was within is alive. So they're like... What about an oyster? That's a shell. You know how you always buy expensive clothes and then donate them because you immediately feel bad about it? That's what shells are. Shells are the donated clothes of the ocean. Okay. If you've ever been... Every shell. There's no difference between a Salvation Army and the ocean.

There's probably one or two. Do you... So every single shell was always home to something? Or is it... Yeah. Yeah. Something living was within or around or near that shell. And then things can grow on shells. Barnacles. I don't like those. I don't like them, but the videos where people crack them off and they save the lobsters. You ever see those? I have. Those are good too.

All the ocean videos are like the coolest, but I don't want to be a part of it. I don't want anything to do with them. I'd like to watch, but I don't want to be a part of it. If I get one, you don't, guys. You know what looks like a lot of fun that I don't want to experience ever in my life, ever? What? When you see a video of like a fisherman and they can like jump up.

And then they're like hovering in the air because the boat is rocking so much. Hell, I don't want to be there, but I like watching it. I would like to. You remember how like when we were kids, if you won on like Legends of the Hidden Temple, you can go to space camp. And it always was the shot of like the kids and like the zero gravity chamber like floating. I don't want to go to space. I want to go to space camp. I don't want to go to the ocean. I want to go to ocean camp. But is that a real thing? Because it's not. There is the zero gravity thing, but it's a plane.

No, they have like zero gravity things, not planes. Really? Yeah. I thought the only way to kind of like replicate that was like the plane that goes like straight up and then straight down or whatever the fuck and you get like zero gravity for like a minute. That would fuck me up. Should we do it? Yeah.

No. I'd be so scared. I can't be in a plane going this way. I don't think it goes down. I think it goes up, whatever, and then when they're doing this part. Still no. Still no. Still no. I'll be honest with you. Still no. Just to float? Fuck that. I'd go to space camp. What's that? Exactly. You can go to space camp, and you can go into a zero-gravity chamber, and you can see stars. I don't believe that that's a thing. How could you possibly not have gravity in a chamber? I don't know.

You could do space camp has been helping inspire the next generation of explorers for more than 42 years. Space aviation and robotic camps. This is something we could do, dude. I'm not going to space camp. It's for 11 year olds, Frank. First of all, yup. I know. It says from nine to 11. Whoa. That's not even cool that they would see that. It's not that they would see that. It's the 9-11 stuff. We're not over it. And the price. How much is it? Space camp is probably expensive. The price is how much you think?

2001. No. Ages 9 to 11, it costs $2,001. And it's run by Osama bin Laden. Honestly, close enough. It's $1,800. Whoa. Yeah. But then you could do a Space Academy, which is for 14-year-olds. And that is $1,900. When do you get to be a cadet? I have seen nothing about cadets. Advanced Space Academy elite cadet.

That just means it's more expensive. $3,000. We're getting up there. For 18-year-olds. I see nothing. Are you telling me an 18-year-old is going to a space camp? Yeah. Time to grow up, Peter Pan. Jesus. Go to college. Adult Space Academy. Learn more. I'm going to learn more. I mean, you're either going... It's $900 a person. On-site overnight accommodations for Friday and Saturday nights at camp. There's dorms? All meals beginning with dinner Friday evening through breakfast Sunday morning.

Dude, I don't know if I can handle that.

That sounds pretty cool. A space mission? What am I saying? I mean, you're doing it indoors, though. You're cool. Then they have space. Oh, that's for educators. I don't care about that one. I feel like there's a lot of math and science that go into this. Adult Advanced Space Academy. Frank, I have a suggestion. Get off your fucking phone. The day that this fucking podcast gets an actual producer that Frank can just be like, hey, can you look that up? So he doesn't have to go to the phone.

But it's what makes us feel like we're real people. Like, we're not just being like, hey, can you look that up? Do that work for me, bitch? Like, we're, like, doing it ourselves. No, you... We're doing it ourselves. We're honest, real people that are... Right. You know...

We're honest, real people. We're honest and real people. People like the show because they feel like they're in on the conversation. And the day that we stop being that is the day that we stop being us. And we don't want that day to ever be us to happen. When you start talking bullshit, it just falls apart. If I talk too much, eventually it comes back around. It eventually just falls apart. Your sentences are made of straw. Yeah, basically, yeah.

It's so funny. It's like, yeah. Damn. Would you go to Space Camp when you were younger? When I was a kid? You would be into that? I don't know, because if it was like, I won Legends of the Hidden Temple, and it was like, you can go to Space Camp, or you can get Nintendo 64 and 18 Skechers. Well, I'd take the 64. I wouldn't hate the Skechers, I'll be honest with you. We should bring back light-up sneakers. For adults? For anything. Copyright. Look at this. We're just continuing...

To fucking innovate. And we've copyrighted all the ideas because Frankie said copyright. Light up shoes for adults. Yeah. Would you... It seems like you would... What are you doing? Oh, he's going to the phone. Yeah. They do exist. Are you sure? Yeah. How sure? Not sure enough that you won't continue to look at it. Light up shoes for adults. Heelys. Yeah. Yikes. Did you ever have a pair of those? My brothers did. I did not. Are they cool?

No, they aren't. And I'll be the one to say it. I'm sorry, Heelys. I hate to destroy your whole campaign. I think they're okay. There's some dudes who do like a bunch of tricks. I know. This looks kind of cool, but like not in high school. It looked cool when you were. Yeah, exactly. It looked cool when you would go home and like, you know.

Watch fucking Disney Channel. Like, not now. Yeah, like, if you're in high school and you're really good at Heelys, and you're like, you could do a bunch of cool tricks, like, that's fire. You just will not get asked. The moment you graduate, the absolute moment you graduate, those things better be in the dumpster. Yeah. Better be. And if not, they're tough. If I saw a pair of Heelys on my college campus, I think I would have lost my mind. I tell you this.

I prefer Heelys over, like, Ripsticks. What the hell's a Ripstick? You know the thing where it's like you move like a snake, kind of? Oh, it's like a one board? Yeah. No, those are way cooler. Nope. Have you seen the ones... These are bad. Have you seen the ones that it's like a scooter, but it, like, breaks off, and you, like...

And it like pumps and it's weird dude. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's weird. I was gonna look it up but I'm not gonna. How do you feel about the motorized one wheel? Hate it. I'm not big on it either. I hate it. I think we need to just like walk. Bro, the guy across the hall from me leaves his in the fucking hallway. Take it. Throw it. Break it. I...

Could possibly one night come home drunk and if it's there being like, I'm gonna try it out. I mean, I think you need a key for it. But also, you don't need a key to take it and throw it down the garbage chute. Down the garbage chute. Yo, they're fucking big. Yeah, I know, dude. And they're like...

They're weird. Like, I remember I've been on, you've been on a hoverboard before, right? Yeah. It's weird. It's tough. Like, you're like, your brain is like, I should fall, but this thing is like, you're not gonna. Right. So I didn't, I never liked it. I'm not big on that. I remember, you remember mopeds? The ones you could sit and it was like gas powered? Those were, like, when you heard a moped in the neighborhood, you knew shit was going down.

I don't know if I told you this, but our friend Dennis got a brand new moped. It was white and it had a handlebars like this and like a chair. You're explaining, you're something I'm very familiar with. But some of them don't have this seat. You just like stand on it. Yeah. This one had like a chair. And he was like, he's like, be careful with the throttle. It's like, it's very sensitive. Very sensitive.

I the first time I went like this the whole thing came out of my hands and just went down the block and then eventually just hit the floor and like spun out and it scratched the fuck out of it he wanted to beat the shit out yeah you imagine he was not very pumped yeah and then I was like I then I've never ridden one again because I was like I recently like someone had like a motorized bike and

Like in the neighborhood and I was like, oh i'm gonna try it out Yeah, yeah, they move they move you gotta be ready for it dude. I was going fast I asked the dude I was like how fast can this thing go? He's like 30 35 or something like that when you're not on something and you're on something this big That's very very fast. I don't like going fast. I don't like it. You know, I I don't know how to answer that question because where the fuck are you going fast who asked you a question?

I don't like going fast. I don't know how to answer that. We're starting to get at each other's throats here. We need to back off. We need to back off and be happy. Frank, where can they find you? FAlvarez885 on Twitter or X. I don't even know. Leave Frank Alvarez on all the forums and social media. Then go check out The Basement Yard. Patreon. Patreon.com slash The Basement Yard. Also...

The basement yard on all forms of social media. If you're looking for us, you know where to find us, baby. Yep. And you guys can go follow me at Joe Santagato. And again, go follow the show on TikTok and Instagram. And that is all. See you guys next time. Yeah!