8: Second Chances.. To Give, or Not to Give?
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Stay farm and DJ Dramos from Life as a Gringo. No making smarter financial moves today secures a financial freedom for a successful tomorrow. Tackle these situations in stride and of course be annoyed when an unplanned expense comes up, but not let it be something that slows me down. Right. As I did with repairing my credit, you know, hiring somebody to do credit repair for me. That was a gift that I gave myself that allowed me to then, you know, get my first apartment.

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Oh, my lower back. People might say our age shows, but... But they haven't seen me in my back pain. We are creaking and cracking today. Like, I'm having a shoulder impingement problem.

Lauren's having a back problem. I bought a new bed and it still didn't work. I'm going to the chiropractor. I just, I don't even know. Don't judge us. We're 27, but we're old at heart. Have you seen that TikTok that they're talking about in between Gen Z and millennials? Oh yeah. The Xennials? Yeah, or whatever it is. And we kind of just...

make the cut or we don't make the cut. Yeah. They're saying it's like 95 and I'm a 94. Oh, I saw 94 and I'm 93 in the one that I watched though. I saw 95. I mean, it's... I'm on the cusp. Yeah, it's kind of up for debate. But yeah, I just thought that was really funny because...

It is a really weird concept right now where the talk of millennials and Gen Z is just the talk of the town. There's a battle going on. Yeah, and I never realized that we were so different or there's different little pockets. You know, I kind of thought like, oh, we're all just young. We're in our 20s and our teens, whatever. Yeah. But...

No, it really matters. That's quite the range. Yeah. Well, at least we're not the generation that's eating Tide Pods. That's Gen Z. Well, I'm definitely not that. So we're good there. You're close, though. You just said you're a cusper. No, I'm a 94. You almost ate a Tide Pod. Not a chance. But thank God you were one year different. Not a chance. You were saved. I would just like to know what those people...

Like we're thinking like, I'm going to eat this laundry detergent. It's going to taste great. Like why? What was the reason? I don't know. Hmm. I'm not up on those trends. No, but I remember when that happened. I don't remember. I remember it. It seemed like there was a brilliant idea behind it. Yeah.

Let me just cleanse my insides. No, you know, because there was this thing going around where models were eating cotton balls. What? Yeah. To feel full. Oh my God. It's not good for you. It's like, this is not advice on how to feel full. That's like, um, do you remember that show? It was on like TLC. It was like my crazy obsession. And I saw this lady that was obsessed with eating moth balls. What's the moth ball? It's like this.

bug deterrent you put in your closet so moths don't eat your clothes. Interesting. It's very old school. Okay. Does it taste good? No. No. It's like, it's poison. It's literally poison. And this other guy was like in love with his car. He would like get under his car and he was into it. But weird show. But I mean, second chances, right? It's all about second chances. Yeah. Just don't give the Tide Pods a second chance. No. No. No. Are you ready? Yeah. Okay. Let's do it.

After the weekend we've both had, this episode is kind of perfect. Second chances to give or not to give. Okay. I'm kind of scared already. Well, Friday night started out pretty rough. We had a friend, one of your close, close friends reach out and she was having some troubles in her relationship. And so it just kind of, you know, do you give a second chance?

Is it worth giving a second chance? Does it ever pay off to give a second chance? I'm a big fan of second chances. But it's always, it depends on where you're at emotionally, mentally. If you don't think there's any chance in hell that you're going to be able to not hold it against the other person, then...

what's the point but if you think that there's a chance that you can really forgive and not hold it against the person that you love and want to be with and I think absolutely yeah I've given a lot of second chances and sometimes they've worked out and sometimes they don't it's just flip a coin yeah do you feel like you've given uh your boyfriend Justin second chances

He's never really done anything to warrant the need for a second chance. Okay. Yet. Interesting. Okay. But no, he's been pretty good. I think communication is really, really hard. And like something we've talked about this past weekend, like communication is not easy with relationships, friends, family. Setting boundaries and having open, healthy communication is so hard. So I think a lot of the issues we're going to read today kind of stem to that, but...

I think we've had like minor issues that communication and miscommunication is an issue, but it's been pretty, it's been pretty chill. Our, our, uh, a little over two years in good. Well, I know I just ordered that book that you recommended. I read the first, the introduction. Did it already come? Yeah. Oh shit. Yeah. Amazon prime baby for the win.

So this relationship book, actually, even just reading the introduction, I already felt better because after this weekend, I realized there was just issues in my relationship with communication. And they're not like there's not thing. It's not like I can't trust. I can't. So I thought, however, yeah.

There's just issues with communication that makes everything so much harder when it doesn't have to be. We go through these loops in order to get to the same end result. So it's just being able to figure out a way to get from point A to point B without the issues in between a lot quicker. And so I think that the fact that me and my boyfriend, we can get to point A to point B, but it just takes like...

butting head in between so much I think that just figuring out how to kind of skip all the fucking messy shit in the middle yeah I feel that I think you know when I have had fights what like me and Justin Bicker of course like every couple fights our relationship is not perfect no relationship is and I think like when we do disconnect it is literally just we're talking we're speaking different languages and you just like it's hard you gotta how do you not beat around the bush and um

A lot of these stories today, they definitely miscommunicated and they could have just gone from A to B, but they took every fucking Candyland route in between to get there. So I'm curious, are these stories that you're about to tell me, are you kind of right now, what's your feel on them? Are there some happy endings? Like, I don't know if I can stomach...

Every single one. Yeah, every single one being like, yeah. There are. Too fragile. I'm having a rough weekend. There are some good ones. But yeah, there's some that might make you want to pull out your hair and kind of be like, what the fuck? Okay. I'm just going to start this off aggressive today. Okay.

Absolutely. Absolutely. Right? That person's the asshole? Wait. Oh, sorry. No. That person's the asshole.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm like, what the hell, Lauren? I know you like a good party, but fuck. No.

No, why did I hear, like, is he the asshole? For buying a yacht. Yeah. Yeah, so yes, he's an asshole for that. That's not cool at all. No. So, just despicable. I, female 34, am a nurse. I've been married to my husband, Dale, for two years. We bought a small house that we got for a reasonable price. However, the house is in bad, no, miserable shape, and we moved in nine months ago. I've been putting money in our joint account to try to renovate the house room by room.

I was able to renovate the kitchen since I couldn't wait. It cost about $4,500. I'm currently saving up for the bathroom renovation. It's an utter mess, and so far I was able to save up $2,500. His salary isn't much. He can't help with renovations, but still takes care of our daily expenses. Hope I made it clear. Now, the issue. I would be furious because...

When you first read that off, even if he had a good paying job and was contributing like equally or whatever. It's like that's still just not respectful at all. No. To just be like, know that your wife is putting money in there to save for a future for you guys to be better. Yeah. And you're just going to blow it on not even your own birthday party, but your best friends. It's a welcoming party. It doesn't even sound like it's a birthday. Yeah. Like how much do you respect your relationship if that's what you're going to do? None. No.

No, it's like, it's not even your money. And granted, yeah, okay, it's a joint account. Right. But joint account stuff then goes for like stuff that benefits you both. Right. Your home improvements. Or you have a discussion about it before you spend anything over $100 in my opinion. Yeah. 2K is a lot of money to spend without asking your partner. Right. Unless, I mean, obviously it's dependent on how much each person works or like not works,

but like how much yeah their income but I mean with these details it's just an absolute no brainer he's not respecting their relationship no so Dale has a best friend who spent years overseas also fuck Dale dumbass Dale

They're very close. And since his friend told him he was coming home, Dale has been planning on having a welcoming party for him, along with other guys in the group. Dale complained about wanting to do something special to welcome his friend home, but not having money to do it. I gave him several ideas, but he still wanted to do something big.

He asked about the bathroom renovation money and if he could use some of the money. We discussed it and I told him that it's urgent to get the bathroom fixed. Told him I too don't get to buy things I want, but I'm making sacrifices here. And he said he understood. I'm sorry. She literally said no. And he still went and did this. There better be something good. Otherwise, like this is...

I was shocked. I would be livid. I...

would not have a husband. No chance. I would not have a husband. I was shocked. I waited for him to come home and I immediately asked him about the yacht. You waited. How are some people on here? So patient, so calm. Yeah, so calm. You see a $2,000 charge on your joint account. One, she's a nurse. We're in a fucking pandemic. You know, she's working her ass off. So that's a really good point. Grinding regardless

this of if she's in a COVID ward or not. She's grinding. The healthcare system is taxed. Right, she's a nurse. She's seen what's going on with the pandemic and then he's having a huge yacht party. Like, the irony. Fucker. What a little fucker. And he's like, granted, I get he doesn't make a lot so he contributes what he can. But that doesn't mean you can then just fucking spend money. What is wrong with people? Wow, this one has left me heated. Oh, is this the one that you texted me that you want to punch a hole in the wall? No. Oh, damn. Yeah, Morgan texted me, um...

Was it yesterday? Yeah. And you're like, I'm getting heated right now about these Reddit stories. I'm about to punch a hole in the wall. Yeah, no. And I was like, oh, no. You're just scared. Knowing it's coming from me. Yeah. Oh, my God. So he said, yes, he did rent a yacht to use for his friend's welcoming party. Said he picked the cheapest one, as if that makes it better.

What is your wife? Love.

Literally, that's what I'm thinking. Also, does this childhood friend expect him to throw down $2,000 for him to come home? Or does he just expect to spend quality time with him? You know, it's like, if you have the money to do that, that's great. But if you don't, you just look like a dumbass. You look like an idiot. Okay, how many other guys, like,

He said it was a group of guys. Like, if there's other guys then, why aren't they all splitting this? That's what I'm wondering, too. It's kind of like the party bus thing. Yeah. If you and all your friends get a party bus for someone's birthday, like, it's split. Right. So it's like, why is everyone not splitting this fucking yacht? I yelled at him and insisted, but he said I was hurting his feelings and not understanding how important his friendship is and how excited he is to welcome his friend home. How old is he? He sounds like he's 12. Yeah.

She's 34. She does not mention his age. But either way. I'm embarrassed. I'm embarrassed for him. I'm mad for her. So he said he already invited his friends and will be so embarrassed to cancel everything now. The argument got heated. I just packed my stuff after telling him he's unreasonable to spend months worth of savings on one day. And he should be focusing on the house since we live in it. But he kept saying I'm selfish for still insisting he cancels the reservation. Wow.

And told me to be careful because he's feeling like I'm financially abusing him. Leave him now. Run. Literally run as fast. No second chance. No second chance. Like, usually I like to see the benefit of the doubt. No. No. No respect. No respect. No remorse. Totally, like, went against her wishes after they had, like, an open conversation about this. And it's like, I mean, I would, even after this, if he decided that he was sorry and everything like that or...

Whatever it is. I'm sorry. I'll cancel it. You're right. But I would lose trust after that. I wouldn't want to have a joint account anymore. And that sucks. That sucks that you have to lose trust in someone that your partner that you want to be with that you're married to that you love like to lose trust to want to not want to share an account with them because they betrayed you because they did something behind your back.

100%. So I just think that there's no hope for this one and it should just be done. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. This guy needs to have some... I don't know. He needs a wake-up call. He sounds like a complete narcissist. Just only concerned about himself. I'm embarrassed. Sounds like a child. I'm embarrassed. My friends are going to... If I cancel...

You're the one that fucked up, buddy. It's like the TikTok. Like, PlayStation make you dinner. I'd be like, okay, your friends can fuck you then. Yeah. Have sex with your friends. Seriously, have fun fucking the yacht. So the top comment on this one, not the asshole. I'd cancel the yacht. Even if you have to take a hit from canceling, part of 2000 is better than none of it back.

And if you decide to not divorce your childish, self-centered, selfish, spendthrift husband, I strongly recommend you open up a banking, checking, and saving account in your name only and hide the passwords. Yeah, I like that one. That's a good response. Yeah. Sometimes you read these off and I'm like, oh, I wish I had that response. I know, like why?

Wish my brain was so rational. I know, but they also, okay, but give me a little bit of a benefit because they actually can think about it and formulate their words and write it all down. Yeah. Whereas like my, I have blind reactions. It's hard. It's scary. It is. But you put yourself out there every day. I do. The next one, the false accusation of financial abuse is where you have to draw the line. OP. That's a serious accusation to make. And he's only doing it to make you feel guilty for being angry or

That was kind of a cute word. Just gurgling. And he's only doing it to make you feel guilty for being angry that he stole thousands of dollars. Yeah, no, that's true. Yeah. That response is not... None of his responses were okay. What would be okay if he was like, okay...

shit you're right I made an impulsive decision yeah without you and that was wrong I was just so excited I wanted to be the hero I wanted to impress my friends and that was so wrong um however I'll take a huge hit on on like you know I'll only get 50% back and if she's catching it early typically like you have 24 hours a lot of stuff which yeah so that's true hopefully they'd be able to work with her

But or like or at least if he addressed like that was stupid like honestly I just I this is wrong as that was of me. I hope you can consider like still letting me go through with this and I will pay you back faster than four months. I just you know like maybe if he was just like you're right that was so stupid of me like there was no but there was no it was just kind of

And it's like, okay, get rid of him. He's a fucking idiot. Yeah. OP does not comment. There's no update. And the post was removed. She's busy getting divorced. I hope so. I'm mad after that one. I need one that's like, I think they're all going to make me mad. I don't think I ever, I don't think I found a good one. You told me this was a lighthearted one after my hard weekend. Okay, this one might make you laugh. Okay.

Boyfriend conveniently waited until we were engaged before telling me that he has a fart fetish. That's actually amazing. Wait, is this one of yours too? No, but like, how funny is that? I mean, the fact that he held it in, pun intended, for that long.

And he waits until they're engaged and he's just like, by the way. He didn't want to scare her off. By the way, just drops the bomb. Literally. God, okay. Maybe I'm the immature one. My 25 female boyfriend turned fiance, 31 male, have been engaged for just under a month. On Thursday, he divulged to me that he has a fetish for women farting. More specifically, women farting during sex.

No, it's going to be a no for me, dog. I overcame the initial... I feel like I've heard about that before, though. That doesn't sound that crazy. I've heard about people pooping on someone's chest.

I didn't think that one was real. I've heard about that. I thought that one was not real. So I'll probably have him on an episode down the road. But my boyfriend's roommate, Austin... Your boyfriend poops on your chest. No. God, with his bowel issues? No. Never. But Austin, his roommate, he's very open about his sex and sexuality. And he was talking about this group sex experience he had. And he's like, yeah, I got pooped on once. And I'm like...

Wow. Not on purpose, like total accident. Oh, okay. And so I don't know if that makes it better or worse. I mean, I think an accident, everyone's into their own kinks and teach their own. Right, so that's why it's like if it's a kink, then it's kind of like, okay, weird, but that's your kink. Yeah, but it's an accident. Now it's embarrassing. Yeah, that is true. There was no consent to be pooped on. If there's consent, it's a little different. Yeah, that's true.

I overcame the initial shock and managed to hide my disgust for long enough to hear him out. After he finished explaining himself, I made it very clear to him that I am not comfortable with that fetish and will not be doing that for him. He acknowledged that. I'm starting to think I may need to rethink this relationship. If I won't indulge his fetish, then how will he?

Yeah.

sexual compatibility is one of my top priorities. What should I do? I agree with that. Yeah. I think if she knows that's like one of her top priorities is sexual compatibility. And I'm with her on that. You can't go through. She's being really rational. Oh, so rational. And I also think like it is a red flag. If that's something you're into, like he's already waited for, you know, sounds like they did it for a couple of years. So he's already at least waited two years to even tell her that's his fetish. Like why? Yeah. I don't know. I feel like you need to be

really open with your partner especially when it comes to sex and stuff like that so why I think that because it seems like she's using the word manipulation and while that could be true I don't think that's completely fair because I'm thinking that he's probably just really embarrassed and scared and it was probably not until that he got engaged that he was like I'm comfortable enough with this person like this is going to be someone who's not just going to like

Think I'm a freaking weirdo and go and tell everyone and make fun of me. Oh, we're all talking about it. So I think that it's a really scary thing for some people to disclose their fetishes because they are they are very taboo and just kind of weird. And, you know, so I mean, yeah.

I kind of, I think that, but she has every right to be like, but that's not fair to me and, and feel, and feel betrayed by just him not communicating earlier because it's like, you feel like when you get engaged to someone, you're supposed to feel like you really know them like inside out for like the good portion, you know? And so to not know something about that, where he makes it seem like a fetish is something that's important to you. In my opinion, that's not something like if he was like, Oh, it kind of turns me on.

But because he's saying it's a fetish of his, that makes it seem like, okay, that's something that he really enjoys and that's important to him in a sexual relationship. Also, where does he want to be farted on? Like, does he want to be farted on in his face? Does he just want you to fart when you're on top of him? What is the... I need more info. I'm picturing it like from behind. You know what I mean? Yeah. Doggy style? I just like at that point, I'd be worried about getting pink eye. Yeah.

I don't know. There's also an easy fix to this. She doesn't actually have to fart. She could just buy one of those little fart machines with a clicker. Just hide it under the bed. See, I think he likes to watch it happen. I feel like that's more of it.

Based on what I've heard about stuff like that, I feel like it's more of the watching it happen. That's why I was thinking doggy. So I don't think it's the noise. Which reminds me... You know what I mean? Okay, did you see... This was a big thing on TikTok too, where people were talking and they're like, when you're doing doggy, ask your boyfriend, but he's watching your butthole. Ew. Yeah, because apparently...

your butthole pulses. Yeah. So guys stare at your butthole. I hate this conversation now. I'm over it. Let's move on. I don't like that at all. Yeah. So text your boyfriend and be like, do you stare at my butthole when we're doing it doggy style? No, I refuse. Don't put these ideas in my head. Text him. I asked my boyfriend, he goes, no. And I'm like, I just, why are you so normal or are you lying? But I don't think he's lying.

Like, he's just so normal. He doesn't, like, the only fetish he has is, like, tall stockings and, like, garters. Oh, that's cute. Yeah. That's it. Do you, have you ever seen that TikTok where a guy says that they pull the skin around their balls out and they make it into a cup? And, like, when they're in the shower? And then they make a little cup of water in the shower? Oh!

And I, so you said that you asked Justin that and he was like, no, I asked my boyfriend and he goes as my boyfriend. He's like, Oh yeah, of course. How'd you know? He's like, yeah, there's no chance that like not everyone's done that. He goes, Justin's a liar. I know. Justin, do you make water? No, I do it with my boobs. Really? Yeah. Like when I'm in the shower, I'll like,

Like, my boobs are... Yeah, because you have nice big boobs. That's not even crossed my mind. No, so you just like put your arms under your boobs and then just like let it fill up like a little water bowl. Oh. That's kind of fun. Yeah. And then all of a sudden you like bring your arms out and all the water goes splash. I'm going to try that and see if it works with me. It's just weird. God, too much info. I hope my family isn't listening. Yeah, I hope that every day, but it's just not true. Okay, second chance on the fart fetish? Yes. Yes.

I would give this one a second chance. Yeah. I think he's worthy. He's not doing anything evil. He's just like explaining and he's scared. I'm not personally into it, but...

But like, yeah, I mean, if she, it just depends how it plays out. Because if she's like, this is an absolutely no, like an ultimatum, I will never be down to even explore this. And if this is like an ultimatum for him where he's like, he will only be satisfied if this happens. Because it's like one of those things that you don't want him to go off and like look at stuff online to like get his satisfaction. That kind of sucks. That's kind of sad. I mean, it can work, but like it still kind of sucks. I think there's ways around this. Like,

I haven't gotten to this level of comfort yet where I'll comfortably fart around my boyfriend. It's been two years, but I'm just not there yet because I'm not. I don't know. I just remember the one time I like, I've never tried to fart around any of my boyfriends, but one time I was walking and

I was walking. You can only clench your butt cheeks so hard sometimes. And so I farted and he looked at me and he's like, did you just fart? And I'm like, no, it was my flip-flop. And I was like, Minnesota in the summer, wet grass flip-flop. I'm like, it could have been plausible. It could have been plausible. And he looks at me and he goes, no, no, no, you just farted. And so then it was like once you break... Which boyfriend was this? My first high school boyfriend. First one. I'm picturing one of the tree brothers. No, no, no, not one of them. But I got to that comfort level, but

I don't know. It's just like I'm not... I haven't cracked the seal on Justin and farting in front of him yet. I think I have because sometimes I'll like fart in my sleep and I'll like literally scare myself awake because I... No way. When I sleep, I'm just thinking, don't fart in front of Justin. Don't fart in front of Justin. And I'll literally scare myself awake. You know when you're like kind of sleeping but not sleeping? Yeah. And I fart and I'm like... Is he awake? It's so funny. I'm the complete opposite. And like...

This goes back to our first episode when we were talking about the guy who poops in the shower. Silent but deadly or loud. Yeah, no. And how I was just like, oh, if I had that happen, like I would poop back. See how he likes it. And so Jeff loves to fart in front of me like loudly. Yeah. Like it sounds animated how loud it is, but it never smells. So that's good. But however, I just feel like it's rude. Yeah.

And so every time... If he's aggressively pushing them out... He is. He's aggressively pushing them out. I'm like, you didn't even try. He's like, it slipped. He says that every time. It slipped. You have a weak anal sphincter then, buddy. Yeah.

And so I get so mad because I'm like, I'm like, do you not love me? Like, and I'm joking, but like, um, and so then now, now I fart in front of him. Cause I'm like, I hope it fucking smells bitch. Dish it right back. Literally. I'm like, learn your lesson. I'm like, if you want this to stop, you know what you can do. Yeah. My aunt, uh, I think she's been with her husband now for like

20 years 25 years but like married for at least 15 and she has still has never farted in front of him no way has never she's lying to you no he he will tell you the same thing never heard maggie fart oh i don't know is everything okay yeah i mean she seems like she doesn't have any stomach issues my favorite pastime to each their own on that one i'm sure i'll crack the seal i'll

He sends me videos too of these like TikToks that this one the other day. It was like this girl backing her butt up to her boyfriend and the boyfriend being like, I'm ready for your farts. And I'm like, you're saying, you're showing me this shit because I know you hear me fart in my sleep. He's like, no, I promise I never have. And I'm like, that's so funny. I wonder why, like, why...

I don't know, because you're so comfortable with him in every way. I know. In so many ways. I don't know. So I'm just like, it's so funny to me that that is like the one thing that's just like, nope. Because they're, I don't have silent but deadlies typically. They're just loud. They're both. Oh, okay. I feel like if they're. I mean, everyone has had both. Come on. Yeah, but I feel like if they're silent, they smell. And I feel like if they're loud, they still smell. Yeah.

I have some. There's no winning either way, so I don't fart in front of him. Okay. Because you just never know what you're going to get. Yeah. It's a magic eight ball. Yeah.

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Visit Safeway.com for more details. Next one. I don't know. I think you're going to, you could go either way on this one. So we'll see. Am I the asshole for leaving in an Uber after what my husband did at the restaurant? Me, 31 female and my husband, 35 male have been married for 14 months. He's

He's a middle school teacher, very close to his family, loves to help out, but can be firm at times. He adores his one and a half year old niece. He always babysits whenever he's got nothing to do. I help with whatever I can. We haven't gone out for a nice dinner in a while. So I asked if we could go out to a new restaurant and try their food and have a good time together. He agreed. And I immediately made a reservation and took care of everything.

Since I couldn't take the day off, I left work early and went to meet him there at the restaurant. I walked in and saw my husband sitting with his niece in a car seat by the table. I asked him and he said his sister had work and wanted him to watch his niece. His family were out of town, so there was no one else besides him. I noticed the restaurant staff were giving us looks since it's not a child-friendly restaurant and I was worried the baby would cry or something. She was asleep at the time.

I would be so irate at this point. Yeah, I'm like, you know, I'm just like, oh, but that's...

Beeps. I know. But in situations like that, it's so uncomfortable. I mean, people go there to get away from all the noise that we hear that we have to deal with. You know, they get away so that they can just like be in their Zen moment. So it's just like as much as like we want to be accommodating and loving to children and people who have children and situations like that. Yeah. Don't go out. No. Don't put other people through that because that's not fair to anyone else. Like they're trying to really just like

unplug or whatever you want to call it. Relax, focus on their dinner, not think about their child crying at home with their nanny or like whatever they're doing. It's like you can pay for a nanny. Yeah. And I get like trying to help your family out and like no one's available. Yeah. Then or pay for a nanny, like a babysitter for, for your family. If they're just like, I can't afford it. Whatever. Just be like, we have these plans.

So I would be upset, but I also wouldn't be – I wouldn't think he's a huge asshole or anything because he's trying to do the right thing. Like, he's a good guy. Like, he's – you know, like, he's not like – he didn't show up with, like, his side thing. Like, he showed up with a baby, you know? So it's like he's trying to do the right thing. He's just being an idiot like they all are, so. So she goes on to say his noise was, like –

disturbing the whole entire restaurant especially when he started singing you're welcome from the moana movie while swinging her i got up to go to the restroom wait he sounds like such a keeper though like besides the setting great dad like he's gonna be a great dad if you guys decide to have kids but at the same time like dude read the room this is a nice upscale restaurant you're fucking ruining the whole vibe for every other person there yeah

A few minutes later, I heard him arguing loudly. I went to see that he was actually trying to change his niece's diaper on the table. No. Oh, my God. I was just taking a nice little sip of my wine and enjoying it. And then I just registered and I was like, no fucking chance. Yeah. The waitress was arguing with him. I was in shock. The manager came after my husband, said he'd take a minute to get it done. The manager spoke to me and asked me to leave.

I was livid. We left and I blew up outside. Did they pay? They must have. Or honestly, maybe the restaurant was like, yeah, maybe they didn't care. Get the fuck out of here. Like we don't even want your money. Right. Asked my husband. That's what they should do. Cause at that point, like if they're kicking someone out, like who's, yeah. I mean, they shouldn't have let him in from the start. Like that's, that's the issue. Like from,

From a host, they should be like, I'm sorry, no children under 12. They need to make rules like that because it shouldn't have even gotten to that point. No. And you honestly have to explicitly say something for people to really get it. If it's, oh, it's so nice, we're just going to assume no one's going to bring their kid.

No, always assume people will do what they want to do. Like strictly have rules. No kids. Well, I worked at a restaurant in Minnesota and it's called Rosa Mexicano and they have one in New York, one in LA, um,

um which i've never been to and um and then a couple of other places but in minnesota it's like they have these company-wide rules where this is the dress code so if you're in new york it's like you can't have like a cap on you can't have like sneakers on or like i don't know just like stupid things like they were trying to like keep up like their upscale like vision and then they also try to follow it to a t so that they weren't being discriminatory like based off of like well that's

Those sneakers kind of work. Those don't, you know? So it's like, it's one of those things where you just have to have an all over. If you're going to do something like that, you have an all around rule because otherwise it's just like people get heated. Oh yeah. Remember when we went to Magic Castle? Oh my God. Yeah. They have a strict dress code. And one of our friends, it was like for my birthday. And one of our friends was wearing something that just like wasn't cocktail attire. And so they made her tie like basically a wrap skirt. They made a tie around her outfit. And honestly, like,

I thought it looked better. Like it looked really good, but she lost it. She was so embarrassed because it was like, she already was a little bit nervous about her outfit from the start. Cause like, you know how sometimes you get ready and then everyone gets ready and then you, you liked your outfit and then you're like, wait, but I like theirs better. And now you don't like your outfit as much. I try on 20 things before I leave. Yeah. So she had the outfit ready when, and like put it on whenever she was like, like with all of us. So it was like, I think, I think it was one of those things where you're like,

She was already kind of questioning her outfit, but we're like, no, it looks amazing. Like, it looks great. Yeah. And then to like have a hard time with it. Yeah. And then to have people and then like be like, sorry, actually you, I need to talk to you. Like, that's so uncomfortable, even though Magic Castle is just like so strict like that. Kind of embarrassing. Yeah. I mean, this one, like this guy just did it to himself.

So OP goes on to say, we left and I blew up outside. Asked my husband why the table while people were sitting around eating. That's the other thing. If there's a poopy diaper and people at tables are next to you, just eating. That's literally like now I'm... Disgusting. I'm confused because I really liked this guy. But what? Like you don't have no idea how social norms, like social behaviors. Why would he not go to the bathroom? Yeah. That's confusing to me. Yeah. She goes on.

He could have told me and I would have picked a different restaurant that allows infants. He embarrassed me, ruined dinner, and got us kicked out. He started arguing with me like I was one of his students after I refused to get in the car, giving me zero out of ten for my reaction and claiming I picked a bad restaurant. Okay, now I'm... You get a zero out of ten for that reaction. Yeah. Apologize. You fucked up. I don't like this. Now...

I really, really liked him and now I'm just slowly, yeah, slowly starting to hate him. How do you not understand that? Oh, anyway, sorry. Go on. Said that he was helping his sister and I needed to understand that.

After the argument, I took an Uber and went home. He went to his sister's place and called saying I shouldn't have left like that and make him feel guilty for wanting to help. But I didn't respond. I just want to say that my husband is the one who insists on taking his niece. He doesn't consider this babysitting. He just loves to be with her and take care of her.

He said he wants us to adopt since it's our only way of having children. Why? Medical reasons. He obviously adores kids, so I understand his bond with his niece. But the restaurant incident was blamed on me. He thinks my reaction was over the top. And honestly, I have no idea why he thinks people should mind their own business when he's behaving like that in a public place. Yeah. Yeah.

That's tough because it sounds like there's a lot more going on there. You know, like there's so much stuff internally. Like it sounds like he genuinely really wants a kid and it probably just makes him... That's fine and dandy, but you don't... Like your wife, you guys haven't had any like quality time? No, I mean, it's not acceptable. It's not okay. However, I do think that it sounds like he has a big heart and he's just like feening to like...

you know love and take care and like raise like a child of his own for sure but at the end of the day like that's not your kid right that's your sisters and you can help out and be the fun uncle and that's great but you also have a partner don't forget about your partner and don't lose quality time yeah doesn't matter how long you've been together you should still be bringing them flowers you should still be planning date nights you should still be showing that like you care and

And putting effort into the relationship. And so like... That's fine. You want to bring the kid. At least tell her. Give her a heads up. Like she said. Pick a different restaurant. And then... Don't change the baby's diaper at the table. Around other people that are eating food. I completely agree. What? I... But...

in terms of like second chance or not like i think absolutely a second chance they're married i just think that like he needs to recognize that he's in the wrong but he needs to recognize it in a way that he can come to terms with it on his own because right now he just feels like i think there's a lot of other things going on so he's just i feel like he's just sad like well i don't have a kid of my own and you don't care and like i just trying to take care of a kid that i care about that's in my life and like you know what i mean no i think i don't even think it's that big

I think truly in his mind, he's like, it wasn't that big of a deal. Interesting. He's blaming her for overreacting. Can we do more polls on Instagram? Yeah. Because I would love to hear like how people think about taking a baby to a restaurant. Like if they think that that's okay or not. I think you can take a baby to a restaurant. No, a nice one. Like a nice one like that. Yeah. Like I would be... No. And then the next poll is, okay, well...

If it's okay to bring the baby to a nice restaurant, which like there can be exceptions depending on the restaurant and the vibe. Is it okay to change the diaper on the table? That's not okay. That's disgusting. I would love to see how people feel about that. No, like there's places where I go and I know I'm going to encounter crying kids. Airplanes.

If I have a flight, I know with 100% certainty that there is going to be a screaming infant next to me. Well, Morgan used to be a flight attendant. I did used to be a flight attendant. Yeah.

And for some reason, I've lived a lot of life. I'm only 27. I know. See, I do have a lot of experience. Commenter that said my age shows. No, she was nice, though. She was like, I think she probably just enjoyed because she was just like, OK, I have issues with my husband. You're making me like feel like it's just as easy as just like, never mind. Yeah. But she was like she was four stars.

or I don't know what episode she was giving the star to, but she gave four. That's still good. Given the D divorce. But yeah, I just, I just feel like there's certain times, you know, that you're going to encounter crying kids and there's nothing you can do about it. Traveling airplanes, like things like that. But when you're going to a restaurant that say like you're spending a hundred bucks a person, like that's pretty expensive. Even 50 bucks a person is pretty like, it's nice. Yeah. So it's like that you just shouldn't

have to encounter crying kids when you're spending $100 on a nice meal. Yeah, I agree. Kids not having fun sitting in their car seat, like take them to fucking Denny's or Perkins and get them a coloring menu.

That's fine. I was also a server at Perkins, you guys. One of my favorite jobs I've ever had to this day was working as a server at Perkins. What? What about Maynards? No. You didn't like that one? No. I did make good money. I've had a lot of jobs. I was a server at this restaurant on the lake in Minnesota and it was beautiful. And no, people there were snooty. Perkins was so fun. I made really good money.

Did you serve just a bunch of families and happy people? Yeah, it was really great. Saturdays and Sunday mornings were the best because you get all the hungover people and they just came in and they just fixed my problems and left you a nice tip. Why does that sound so nice right now? I'm craving pancakes. Do you have any? Yeah, we can make some.

Second chance. Nine o'clock on a Monday, but hey. But definitely he needs... Never too late for pancakes. He needs some work. Yeah. I think this is definitely not a goodbye, though. No. Yeah. They're married. I think, you know, it sounds like, you know, they're happy otherwise, but he's a little...

He's got his head in the sand a little bit. He's got to have a wake-up call. I liked when you were giving me advice. You went from yesterday, you went from head in the sand to head in the clouds. And it's funny because every time you said that because you switched off a couple of times, I'm like, okay, he's up here. Now he's down there. I'm literally visualizing it because I'm a very visual thinker. So I'm like, okay, where is he at? His head is not where it's supposed to be. Dumb. Oh, my gosh.

Hey there, it's Ryan Seacrest for Safeway. Take care of yourself this summer and save on personal care items at your local store. Now through August 27th, get extra discounts when you purchase participating items like Dove Beauty Bar, Dove Body Wash, Dove Men Plus Care Body Wash, or deodorant, Dove Shampoo, Trace-A-May Shampoo, and Axe Body Spray. The more you buy, the more you save. Catch these deals before they're gone. Offer ends August 27th. Restrictions apply. Promotions may vary.

Visit Safeway.com for more details. I've got one last one. Perfect. Love that. Okay. My 27 female boyfriend, 28 male, is obsessed with my ex, 27 male. We've been together for two years before this. I would say our relationship was very close to perfect. Like, sorry, continue. I was going to say obsessed like he thinks he's cool or obsessed with like looking at him. You're about to find out. Okay.

At the beginning of the year, though, my boyfriend and I were at a grocery store, and we bumped into my ex and another friend. This was the first time they had ever met each other. We made polite conversation before going our separate ways. My boyfriend made a sarcastic comment about how nice my ex was when he was out of earshot. I didn't think much of it at the time. A few weeks after this, I noticed he was on my ex's Facebook page.

When I asked him what he was doing, he shrugged it off and said he was curious because he saw my ex had commented on Luke, a mutual friend of ours, post. He's since friended him on there and claimed my ex was the one to initiate it. He's followed him on Instagram and Twitter too. He comments on a lot of his posts, but my ex rarely comments back. He also somehow got Luke to invite him- Rarely, but he still does. Some interaction. Yeah.

He somehow got Luke to invite him to my ex and his friend's weekly virtual hangouts. I mentioned I found it weird that they were hanging out, but he dismissed it and said it wasn't a big deal. He also started talking about changing his career path to what my ex is doing and makes snide comments about if his dad paid his way for him, he could take me on fancy trips too. Because the accident? Yeah, sounds like it.

He's also become incredibly passive-aggressive towards me and makes comments about how if my ex didn't move abroad for a few years, we probably would have never dated. If I say no to anything, including sex, he comments about how he bets I wouldn't say no if my ex was the one asking. Jeez. He also got really sulky when he realized I still had a gift my ex gave me. What was the gift? I don't know. Dildo. Dildo.

No, but if it's a nice purse, like, you're not going to throw that away. Right, of course not. Like, a present is a present. Yeah. No, I would never... And, like, I also... Well, I just have, like, a good relationship and friendship with my ex. So if he got along with my current boyfriend...

I would be like, that's cool. But I wouldn't, I would not be like, go to a boy's weekend. Yeah. That's weird. Don't go out of your way to like hang out with him or be friends with him. Right. But if they were in the same setting, they get along. Like I would love that because like I have a good relationship with my ex. Yeah.

I would just be scared that they would like talk shit about me. Like, oh, when she's mad and she makes this face. Oh my God. But other than that, I'd be like, you know, it's cool. However, once you introduced all the rest of the things that he's doing, making those comments, because I was like, okay, maybe he just likes the guy. Super insecure. But no, it's like, it's almost, he's,

It seemed like he liked the guy and just thinks he's cool. And it's like, yeah, like he, we had a great conversation when we were at this cabin about like what he's doing. I'm really interested in it. Like all that stuff is like, yeah, it's kind of weird, but throw it all together. And it's like, yeah, this other stuff over the top. This is, that's not good. This is really bad. No. Yesterday we had a massive fight over it because I wanted to spend time together, but he ditched me to go hang out with my ex. Wow. I got so upset. I told him he might as well date my ex instead.

I don't really know what to do now. He's giving me the silent treatment and I heard him tell my ex what I said, which is really humiliating. What can I do to make him stop hanging out with my ex? I just like this is so weird. If their relationship was like if they had a bad breakup. Why is that humiliating? It's just like embarrassing. She's clearly like jealous, insecure, annoyed. Right. And that's true. Like the ex is probably like, wow, she said that? Like why is she so jealous? Like we're just friends. Like sorry that we get along. Yeah. Yeah.

No. We have mutual interests. Yeah. I want to be him. This to me, like this dude is clearly like super insecure. There's definitely more like going on here, but like the snide comments, like you wouldn't say no if your ex was asking, especially about sex. Yeah. Like you should never pressure your partner into sex or guilt trip them or make them feel shitty when you say no. Right. When you said that, that was kind of enough for me to be like, he's just not the one for you. No. He's just not. No. There's too many issues that he has to work through. Yeah. That...

It doesn't sound like he's a horrible guy, but he did befriend and become friends with someone that he is also extremely jealous of. Yeah. And that's just... It's weird. And he's jealous of because of his girlfriend. That whole combination is just like it's going to fail. No matter if he continues down this path, it's going to fail. I don't really see... I think that he could have a friendship with this guy if he wasn't throwing comments like that, especially throwing...

throwing them about sex too, like shaming you for not having sex. That's never okay. And so I think that if that wasn't involved, then they could have a good little friendship going on. But I would definitely say this is not the guy for you.

And it's you can explain to him like how it makes you feel. But at the end of the day, I don't think that there's going to be a future if things continue down this way. No, not at all. The top comment on this one. If you want to be so much like my ex, I will just break up with you, too.

I like it. That's hot. That's really cocky. I'm turned on. I like it a lot. So she gives an update. Okay. So she gave the update nine days ago. This post that I, the original one I read was three months ago. So the update was really recent. Okay.

So after my last post, I tried to take the advice in the comments and suggested couples counseling. And I asked my boyfriend to cut off my ex, but he got angry at me again. He claimed I was the one who needed therapy because I had jealousy issues and that my ex was one of his good buddies and I couldn't dictate who he was friends with. Then a week later, he had another hangout with my ex and his friends where he proceeded to very loudly tell them how I was so insecure and

And I was trying to tell him who he could speak to. He's so done. He's so far done. No second chance for this one. Where even is the relationship in this? Like, I can't, like, it's so hard for me to even picture them being happy together. They were dating for two years. That's insane. Two years. Two years.

This to me sounds like he... What age is he? 20, 28. I was going to say like typically mental illnesses come out in your early 20s and he could have one and it's just kind of coming to surface. But like this sounds like something just... This doesn't sound normal. This sounds like very... Yeah. Just almost like he's... Gone girl. Ill. Just...

This just isn't healthy or normal to become so obsessed. Exactly. And it wouldn't, like I said, it wouldn't look like it's obsessed if he didn't make comments like that. Yeah. That's what scares me. Because that's not okay. If he was just friends with him, it's like, yeah, it's a little bit weird. But like, sorry, if they get along really well, who cares? Who cares? Yeah. And another thing that I would not be okay with is the fact that he's just like,

divulging this like she's so insecure whether that be true or not true or whether he's like like that's not okay no you don't talk shit about your partner and that's especially to her ex-boyfriend yeah it's an uncomfortable situation and that's kind of something that I realized like with like being so you know emotional this weekend and just I mean just trying to figure out communication with my boyfriend and like how we can communicate best with each other something I realized about my friends that I really appreciate and value is that when I'm

or like stressed or whatever about something like a relationship, it's like,

You sat down with me and you just like walked through it with me, like from a very like third party perspective, like you're, you know, you're saying like, this is probably where he was feeling when, when you were communicating this. And this is probably why the defense went up and all this stuff. It's, it's a really good picture, like holistic picture. People talking to their friends being like, they're so insecure loudly. Like that is so not okay. No. And there's a difference between like venting and trying to like talk about something and

rationalize it with another person. Talking to your friend and trying to be like, I just don't understand where he was coming from. Like, what do you... What's your take on this? Like, what do you think? And then you're just throwing your partner under the bus. Like, you're truly shit-talking. And I think maybe sometimes you do need a shit-talk or vent or something, but then do it to someone that isn't so involved in, like, what the issue is. Yeah. Because that's...

that sucks you know like do it like talk to your mom about it and be like oh she's so insecure I'm so frustrated like something like that but like to talk to the person that you're like claiming that she's insecure about like their friendship yeah that's not cool he's fishing for attention from this person right like he's fishing maybe he's for the ex maybe he's gay

Something. My ex and Luke, who's the mutual friend, had to tell him to stop, which he didn't like at all. I should have just broken up with him at this point, but I was stupid and still clinging to the hope. Wait, the ex told him to stop too? Yeah. Wow. The ex was like, shut up, buddy. Yeah. That's when you know it's bad. That's when you really know. That's when you know it's bad.

I should have just broken up with him at this point, but I was stupid and still clinging to the hope of my boyfriend going back to how he was. After this happened, my boyfriend was constantly making jabs at my ex and Luke, and then he would still contact them and pretend to be friends with them.

Then he became super interested in what my sex life was like with my ex. Oh, my God. He was constantly asking me who was better between the two of them. And he would ask me if I'd done this or done that with my ex. Damn. I could see him like in a different scenario if all this wasn't the case. I could see someone being like, I want to do something with you that you've never done with anyone before. Yeah. You know, I could see that. This is crazy. Yeah. I read this to Justin, my boyfriend.

I got to this part and he's like, well, I don't know. I've asked you about past partners and things you've tried or if there's anything else you're interested in. And I'm like, you're not asking me in a way that you're curious about my...

Or it's the whole layup of this. Yeah. Like there's other, there's so many other factors here. So many factors that makes this. If that was the only instance, if he was just like, am I better than your ex? And like that's the only comment and that was the story, then it's just kind of like, okay, whatever. Yeah. But it's the combination of all of these things together that makes it kind of. He literally wants to be the ex. Yeah. He wants to be him. Yeah. I feel like we see movies about stuff like this. Like that.

Beyonce movie obsessed or whatever it was oh I never watched that but I did hear about that yeah she goes on to say I kept telling him I didn't want to talk about it and to stop asking me I then find out from my ex and Luke that he has been asking my ex directly the same questions wow wow how does the ex handle that like what how does he respond doesn't really say

And that he has been bragging about our sex life to his friends. My ex said he was telling me because my boyfriend made a comment about loaning me to my ex if he ever felt like recreating old times. That was the final straw for me. And I broke up with him and moved out. They were living together? Yeah. Damn. Two years. I mean, that's a good chunk of time. I just didn't know they were living together. But I guess that makes sense. Yeah. How old are they again? 27 and 28. Wow.

My now ex-boyfriend didn't take the breakup well, and he went on a smear campaign. He even contacted my family and my ex's family to tell them we were apparently having an affair and that he had no choice but to break up with me. What's wrong with him? It's been almost a month since we broke up, and he keeps getting new numbers to text and call me. Yeah. I really think this is like a mental illness. Absolutely. Like, this is not normal. And like, I think it's gotten to the point where... I'm scared of him, honestly. Yeah. Like, no, she... OP needs to get a restraining order or...

Some sort of protective order because this is not normal. To then like lie and manipulate and like totally change the situation and call your ex's family. And not only just your ex's family, you call that guy that you're obsessed with and you've been trying to be friends with and basically be. Unreal. I just, obviously there's a lot of other details, but, and it's way easier said than done when you're in a situation, but I just can't even imagine her staying with him for as long as she did because I'm

I would have been done after the first. But it's hard because she has like what she was saying. She has these memories of how he was before. And now it's just like she's just waiting for that to come back. But it hasn't come back, you know. It's really tough. And so what is she looking for? She just looked like what she just thought was just an update. She just. Oh, OK. Yeah. The first the first. Oh, because you said that it was like three months ago. Yeah. Yeah. So it took like three months for them to break up.

I'd be scared. It's hard because I'm picturing him just being this little punk-ass bitch, but you have to remember that there's other things that he does too. He's probably been sweet some other times or like, I don't know. Well, I think she was just like she said, kind of holding out hope. Waiting that he would be himself again. Yeah. Which again, like,

How do you just flip a switch after two years and become obsessed with someone like that? That's crazy. Like if it was the beginning of their relationship and he got really insecure, like right after he met this guy, but like after being together for that long and then deciding to, I'm surprised the ex like wanted to be friends with him. Like I'm surprised he didn't see some other red flags too. Seriously. Really, really strange.

Well, I'm glad she got out. Me too. Didn't give him another chance. Restrain order. I would change my name. Go to the witness protection program. I get scared with people like that. Well, that's all I have for you on this episode of Two Hot Takes. I'm out of wine and stories. So until next time. I'm out of blind reactions. Lauren's back is hurting. My back is hurting. But weigh in, you guys. We would love to hear if you guys think that some of these stories warranted a second chance.

or if we were on the money or if we were wrong and you would run the opposite direction. Or if you agree with Morgan or me because we have differing opinions. Yeah, we want to hear from you guys. So we'll have to post some polls on Instagram, definitely about the one who changed his baby on the table because that I just find repulsive. So we'll see. We'll see what you guys think. But until next time. Adios. Bye. ♪♪♪

Hey there, it's Ryan Seacrest for Safeway. Take care of yourself this summer and save on all your personal care favorites. Now, through August 27th, save up to $3 or more when you purchase participating personal care items like Pampers Wipes, Gillette Razors,

Metamucil, Crest Toothpaste, Secret Body Spray, and a Swiffer Power Mop. The more you buy, the more you save. Catch these deals before they're gone. Offer ends August 27th. Restrictions apply. Promotions may vary. Visit Safeway.com for more details.