Don't Be A Victim
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A lot of my super successful entrepreneur friends are really good at having extreme ownership, really good at staying focused and understanding everything's happening because of them. It's not happening at them and they're not the victim. My name is Rudy Moore, host of Living the Red Life podcast, and I'm here to change the way you see your life in your earpiece every single week. If you're ready to start living the red life, ditch the blue pill, take the red pill, join me in Wonderland and change your life.

Hey guys, what's up? Welcome back to another episode of Living the Red Life. Today we are going to talk about ownership versus being a victim, okay? And this is one of the most important aspects of an entrepreneur and also one of the most important aspects of managing staff is understanding where people fall, how to recruit around these, and how to be a better entrepreneur as an individual and generally a better individual in life.

Um, you know, a lot of these principles I learned over time from very successful entrepreneurs, many of the greats of the world and from some great books and entrepreneurs such as extreme ownership, the book, um, that you've probably read. If not, you should read it because it summarizes all of this very well and goes very in depth and tells you great stories to actually learn this. But the whole concept around extreme ownership, Jocko, you know, who wrote, um,

book Extreme Ownership Navy SEALs and it's all about you are responsible for the outcome okay and something we try and teach our team and focus on ourselves is understanding that your where you are in life the results of your business the results of everything falls on you as an owner and then what we also try and do is build extreme ownership into our team because the more they have ownership around their projects tasks and the outcome

and the less they fall into victim mode, the better they will be and the more successful they'll be and a better time they'll have working with us and a better time we'll have working with them because we have alignment of vision. Now, the problem for 99% of us is we're brought up in this victim mentality. And most of society, 99% of society are victims, right? Where stuff is happening at them, right? And stuff is happening in a negative manner and they all have the why me, right? Why me? Why did...

I get hit with this tax bill. Why did I lose my iPhone? Why did someone steal my handbag? Why did this employee steal money from me? Why did my ads not work, right? Why did that coaching program and consultant I hired not work, right? And we have a society where most people have this victim mindset. So what happens when most people live that way is it's norms.

right? It's the norm. So now what happens is our children are brought up that way and it just snowballs. So it's very hard to build this extreme ownership mindset. Yeah, I've been studying this for six, seven, eight years and I wouldn't say I'm perfect. By any means, I sound better than 99% of people, but I still fall back into it sometimes and have to kind of

push my, you know, get myself together. And I see a lot of my great staff still fall into it. And some of my executives and other good staff are, you know, better at it than others. And a lot of my super successful entrepreneur friends are,

really good at having extreme ownership, really good at staying focused and understanding everything's happening because of them. It's not happening at them and they're not the victim. So I want you to, you know, obviously I can't teach everything today, but I want you to go forward and understand if you can build this extreme ownership mindset where you're in control of your destiny, you're in control of what happens, whether it's good, bad or ugly, and that everything is happening because

For you know, it's not happening at you like a victim is happening because of you it will change the way you live your life It will change the way you run your business and then especially if you can build that around you with the Surroundings the people around you the team around you the family around you. It's all Hamza's mentality You'll be way way more successful. Generally, you'll be happier because when you go into this victim mindset, it's a lot of negative emotion like negative energy

And it even releases negative hormones from the brain. Whereas when everything's happening because you're in control of it and you caused it and now you also most importantly have the opportunity and the power to fix it, you will become way more successful. So one thing that we try and, like I said, build in with our team, okay, it starts with you as a leader and obviously you as an individual.

And then as you grow it into your team, it's really important because most projects, if you look at your team and your staff is like they work in isolation and then your expectation as CEO is why is this not fully done? And then they go, well, I did this, but they didn't do the other steps. And you're like sat there frustrated and I dealt with this for 12 years.

Right, like, well, sure you did that far, but you didn't do the other part. And then they go, well, I didn't have the information to do the other part. And you go, well, why didn't you ask? Right. So you're probably listening to this and it's like a trigger because this happens to every single entrepreneur and CEO. Right. Whether you've got $7 an hour guys on Upwork or you've got $7 or, you know, 150 grand salaried execs, it's still going to happen in some capacity. So.

understanding and training then to have this extreme ownership is going to be one of the best core traits and core values you can have in your company to stop that repeated problem which is so constant in business. Part of it's obviously down to systems, part of it's down to expectation, but

What will trump both of those is if every single staff member, as many as possible, will live by this extreme ownership where they own every project and they own the success of the projects and the outcomes of the project. So they do whatever it takes to win, just like the Navy SEALs. They do whatever it takes to complete the mission. And what you'll find with 99% of employees is they do the opposite. They do one task. They don't care, understand, or even know about the mission.

right? So your job is to get them to know, care, understand, and then actually own the entire mission. And when you do that, you build this cohesive team that operate like an elite unit, like the Navy SEALs. And that's our constant goal as a company, right? Are we there yet? No. Do we go in phases where we get better and worse and better and worse? Yes. That's

Sadly, the battle of managing teams, building teams, managing employees, okay? But it starts with the person. If the person isn't leading the rest of their life like extreme ownership and they're leading most of their life as a victim, it's very hard to convert them, right? It's like hiring someone that's maybe overweight, right? And you're like, well, you've got to eat a better lifestyle. You're going to have more energy, better clarity, better focus. I need you to start going to the gym. Right? That's very hard to convert someone to that, right?

versus finding someone that maybe live those core principles. And I'm not saying your staff need to do that or whatever. It's just an analogy or an example. It's better to find and actually build in an interview process

to find values and obviously this all has to be done HR-compliantly but to find people that align with your core values and align with that extreme ownership where they're going to take more care. They understand that projects and the outcome of the results is up to them. They understand that if something's failing, they have the power to control and change that but they have to be proactive in doing so and ultimately having someone that lives the rest of their life knowing that they are responsible for the good and the bad and that

Life isn't happening against them, life is happening for them, right? Life's happening for you so you can learn. And the way I live this is like some of the biggest, scariest things in business, right? Big losses and government entities coming into your business and audits and massive partnerships and hundreds of thousands being stolen from you. Every single one of those things has happened to me because I built myself and my mentality and my mental framework

to live with extreme ownership, I see these happening. These things are maybe in this delusional way, but most billionaires and successful entrepreneurs are very delusional, that these things are happening for me to unlock the next level of my entrepreneurial journey and career and life. So it's like, oh, major problem A, I'm not gonna say them all because some of them are very confidential and stuff, but they'll all happen if you wanna try and get to a hundred million or a billion. So it's like, problem A happened, most entrepreneurs would quit, have a nervous breakdown.

fold the company, I'm like, "Okay, great. This is the next challenge of my journey." Now, don't get me wrong, there's a like, "Oh, crap" moment in there where I feel like, you know, "How do we fix this? We're running into attorneys and people, like, what do I do?" But after that resolves, you know, that initial shock, right? It's like when you get in a cold plunge. After that initial shock subsides, it's like, "Okay, this is happening for me because, A, I have to say responsibility that I didn't do this and this, which I should have, right? So I've got to now face those consequences, fix those consequences,

But also it's happening. So I learn a lesson that from now on, those things will never happen again. And it's unlocking the next phase of my entrepreneurial journey. And that mentality that I've built is what makes one of the reasons I'm successful. But it's very hard to do. Most people don't have the mental strength to

or live by extreme ownership where they can turn what most people would consider a catastrophic problem that most would just close down their company and have another breaks down and lose two months of sleep. I can just flip after, you know, not instantly, it might take a day, but I can flip into, I wouldn't say a positive, but the most positive manner possible, right? Well,

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a second. Before we go into the rest of this episode, I'm going to interrupt abruptly and just ask you one big favor. I hope you're getting a ton of value, a ton of knowledge. I hope you're getting some breakthroughs from myself and the guests. And I want one thing in return. What I would love is for you to subscribe and leave a review. The reviews and the subscription grows the podcast. It allows me to bring you even better guests. It allows me to invest even more time and money

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Now I'm working through it and moving on. I want to not derail the conversation, but one thing I have learned in life and business, I'll give you this gem, is nothing's ever going to be as bad as it may seem generally, right? So these like old crap moments, generally once you work through them, if you have the right people around you and you've got all the right stuff set up, it's going to be way less like actually severe as you think. So understanding that you can own it, control it, you're responsible, probably responsible for it,

and that now it's just there to help you progress to that next level in some capacity and there's some lessons to be learned from it, will give you a much better happiness, a much better mental framework, much better mental state. And remember, we think and produce 10 times better

when we are in that emotional state, when we're that positive, I'm in control, this is happening to allow me to go to that next level, this is happening for me, I'm not a victim, right? You're going to function and actually deal with the problem 10 times better than if you're a victim like most people where, why is this happening to me? It's not fair. I don't deserve it. I've worked hard. I'm a good person. I did nothing wrong. I'm just unlucky, right? All those victim mentalities that most people have

when that happens you generally take no action because you feel this can't be real this should be happening to me maybe it will go away and then actually the problem gets ten times worse so live your life right with with extreme ownership create a business with a an employment based system and core values where every single person probably not the degree of you because you're the CEO but every single person is owning their department their tasks their projects like they are

in charge, like they are the founder of that little division and not living the victim lifestyle so if something's not done they're pointing fingers, they're taking responsibility and saying "you know what Rudy, you're right, I understand that, you know, I did this and I didn't think about those next phases or didn't check it was handed off or I didn't ask the right questions and I'm really sorry that happened, I've learned now that I have to see the bigger picture, I have to think three moves ahead like a chess master like you do"

and I'm gonna go away and build a better system and ask better questions the next time I get tasks from something like this to make sure I fully understand expectations and scope, right? That's a much healthier and better employee that you'd all want to work with. The most employees where they're like, "Wow, you didn't say do that and then..." And it's like this Spider-Man point off. Have you ever seen that meme where it's like three Spider-Men just all pointing at each other? That's how most people function in life.

So one of the best things you can do, but just remember all of this starts with you, right? You're not going to be able to find, hire, train and build a culture of extreme ownership if you haven't fully lived through it, understand it, right? And I was fortunate that some of my old mentors and people I hung around with early on got me onto this 10 years ago or so when it wasn't sexy and popular and

And I've always been a very positive, optimistic person. So I fall into that and I've always been a control freak. So I wanna have control of my life and the outcome. So I fall very well into living by those core principles anyway. Some of you will find it harder, right? Just like some people find working out super easy and staying skinny and some people find it super hard, right?

But you will, if you try hard, discipline like anything in life, if you try hard and stay disciplined, you'll be able to shift your mindset and your leadership to that extreme ownership. And when you do so, you'll be able to bring other people with you, people around you, and your team and company will function at a much higher level. You'll actually be helping your own team, company, and people around you with personal development to live their life at a better standard, at a higher standard, at a more productive, positive standard, which is what the world needs right now. It needs more people

controlling their life and understanding they are in control of the outcome and everything can be good or bad. Whereas obviously most people, right, in society see the bad. They see the victim, they become the victim. And, you know, as many famous people state right now, we have a society of victims.

And I see that, right? Hiring thousands of employees over my life, you see the 90% that fall into the victim mentality and the percent that don't, and they are generally way more successful. So the only thing I would say to finish is understand like everything. You know, the famous saying, you're like your five friends, five people you hang out with.

So this should be applied, like most personal development and mindset things, this should also apply into the people that you spend time with. So if you spend time with a bunch of victims, you're going to find it way harder, you're going to become a victim subconsciously, and you're going to find it way harder to have more ownership. If you spend your time with a bunch of people that take ownership, and when you complain and say, I can't believe this happened, their reply is,

"What's the good thing it happened? It happened. Why did it happen?" I always question people, even my friends. I say, "Well, why did it happen?" They go, "Well, could you have done this and this to stop it?" And they go, "Well, I guess, but..." And then they'll make an excuse. "I guess, but..." Right? So if you actually spend your time with people that go, "Well, it's your fault because you didn't do this," and they're very blunt like I am, right? You might not enjoy those conversations, but they're the best conversations. And I have another podcast about why hard conversations are great.

So, yes, in summary, find friends and people outside of the work environment, too, that eat other that function just like this. Right. That have those extreme ownership core values built into who they are with integrity as individuals, not just in the workplace, because the more you surround yourself with success and like people like minded with success, people in control of their life and in control of the outcome of their life.

the more successful you will be. And of course, that will then ripple into your family, future generations, your children, and it will eventually make society a stronger and better place to live in too. So live your life with extreme ownership. Go study from some of the other, you know, the greats out there that,

Teach this super well, like I said, the book's the best place to start, Extreme Ownership. Start training that muscle. And then when you get hit with something bad or when you want to be a victim, just remind yourself of this and then you have a choice every single time anything happens to you. Remember, you have a choice to go down the positive Extreme Owner path or down the negative victim path. And only you have the choice

And ultimately in life, the choices you make every day will dictate the outcome of your life and the success you live and the life you live and the legacy you leave behind. So live it with integrity, live it with extreme ownership. That is today's episode, guys. I hope you go forward and do this because it will change your life and it will make you a better leader and a better CEO. Until next time, keep living the red life and I'll see you guys very soon. Take care. My name's Rudy Moore, host of Living the Red Life.

podcast and I'm here to change the way you see your life in your earpiece every single week. If you're ready to start living the red life, ditch the blue pill, take the red pill, join me in Wonderland and change your life.