142: #142 Pranks & Practical Jokes
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Hey, I'm Ryan Reynolds. Recently, I asked Mint Mobile's legal team if big wireless companies are allowed to raise prices due to inflation. They said yes. And then when I asked if raising prices technically violates those onerous two-year contracts, they said, what the f*** are you talking about, you insane Hollywood a**hole?

So to recap, we're cutting the price of Mint Unlimited from $30 a month to just $15 a month. Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. $45 upfront payment equivalent to $15 per month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Taxes and fees extra. Speeds lower above 40 gigabytes. See details. Hello, folks. And hey, Bear, welcome to the Nate Land podcast. Welcome, everybody. Excited to be here. We're here. We're doing it. Kind of, yeah.

I feel like we're rolling. It's already started. We're in it. I got to get it together. My mind was, you got to get it together. But it's, yeah, we're doing good. I had a good weekend in Florida.

Well, it's been a month since we've all been here together. Yeah, that's true. So it's going to take a few minutes to get back into the swing of it. Yeah, yeah. People just, can you imagine someone listening and they go, and someone's like, I want to turn it off. He goes, no, no, you got to give them. They could fast forward it. Give them 15 minutes. But he goes, give it. That's how our, and our podcast is that, where they tell, don't people say they're like, you got to give it a.

Yeah, Dusty, what do you call your comedy sometimes on stage? Oh, crockpot comedy. Yeah. Takes a while to heat up. Yeah, yeah. You know, at first you don't even know if this thing's on or not. Before you know it. You got a pot roast. You got a nice meal, yeah. Yeah. You got to start it a day early. You got to think about it. Yeah. Know what you're buying.

Yeah, I – well, I mean, that's where we would be the most like Seinfeld. Seinfeld was like that where you're like, you got to watch it. If you watch it, you're going to love it. Yeah. FAU, which is in the Final Four in basketball, they released a hype video put together with Seinfeld clips. Oh, really? It's very funny. It's like showing Frank Costanza when he called –

uh jerry's dad yeah and said i'll be all over that yeah shuffleboard court try to keep us out try to keep yeah that's great yeah oh look at that so you find like they're they need to hire a younger social media person you and i are the only two that like it like they're yeah people are like what is that social media guy you're like i'd imagine is he 43 years old and he go yeah how'd you know that well

Who would? He's never got a chance. Nobody thought FAU would go this far. So they're like, just let Harold do it. Yeah. That's funny. You had a big birthday. I had a big birthday. 44-year-old. 44 years old. Happy birthday. Thanks. It was in Tallahassee at Florida State. Basketball. Their arena.

And they did nice things, and they had some stuff. And when I went out, I had a lot of people yell, happy birthday. Oh, wow. Which is a sign. I took it as a, you know, because I've gone on, I've probably done shows almost all my birthdays, if they're at least Thursday to Sunday. And before, I almost want to say last year, I'm trying to remember where we were. We were in New York.

I don't know if anybody yelled happy birthday last year. I'm just saying no one would know. It was a down year. It was a down year. Like no one. Made some major moves though. Made some. Yeah. And.

And maybe someone yelled at it in here, but it wouldn't be an overwhelming happy birthday. And before that, you usually have to tell the crowd, it's my birthday. You got to fish a bit. You got to go. He goes, I don't know, man. I'm getting older. Today's my birthday. You just got to slowly let it slide. To go, no, no, no. You got to sit down. It's my birthday. This one was a giant surprise.

yelling of happy birthdays. So it was very, it felt, I mean, they make it, every audience, and it's what I love. Everything feels very warm, and I just like to picture that they're all, everybody's just nice to each other there, and we're just having a wonderful, just a good time. So it was very sweet. And then I ate, I mean, just...

They had ice cream cake, cupcakes. I was mixing the ice cream cake. I mean, I was like, I had ice cream cake before I went on. Florida State, the Donald L. Tucker play. That's the name of it, convention or whatever. Civic Center? Civic Center. Donald L. Tucker Civic Center. So everybody that worked there, they brought me all this stuff and then –

Is that you on stage? That is me. Yeah. No. While people are yelling out happy birthday, get your arms raised. Oh, yeah. Bring it in. What you don't see is I'm going, the screens behind me go, guys, it's Nate's birthday, everybody. On three. And I'm like, guys, quit it. Quit it. Now, there was no acknowledgement of my birthday that I know of. Maybe someone said it before. I didn't hear Julian or Justin. I don't think they would have. But yeah.

It was, yeah, it was very nice. And then, so they had, as I was doing ice cream cake and then Outback, who's our promoters, not Outback Steakhouse. A lot of people think that. It's a company called Outback. And so they are the promoters. They got me something and they got me these cupcakes and the cupcakes were awesome. And we did a little Elaine, the muffin, top of the muffin thing.

Top of the muffin to you. We took it. I mean, the top was unreal, unreal. And so then, and then we had like, after we got done, we went to this hotel. What'd you do with the stumps? Uh, I would then kind of get after the stump a little bit. I did a little bit of stump, but I mean, they left them in there. Okay. You know, and we gave them to a homeless guy. So, uh, no, we go to this. He was so mad. Yeah. We go to this hotel, uh,

And afterwards, Travis, my tour manager, and they set up like a fun, you know, you're usually working on your birthday. They set up a very fun night. We went to this hotel and like they had a room that had like a pool table and like we played cards and just had that cake. And we ate at this steak restaurant before. So it was a nice thing. And then people just got married in this room. Like this hotel has a room that like you can rent out for rent.

I guess like a wedding or like a reception or something after. So then they, uh, you crashed it. No, no, but they left. We booked it after them. So they, they had to leave, but then they, I think they were big fans. So they came, I met them and then they came back in and we took pictures. They just got married, which was fun on my birthday. I always remember.

Their wedding anniversary. Yeah. They'll always remember your birthday. They'll always remember my birthday. I hope so. Maybe they forget. And you're like, dadgummit. You go, well, I got y'all something. So this is awkward. And then, so yeah, we went there. Ricky, our bus driver, broke the door to the hotel. Yeah.

We walk into these glass doors and Travis is... Because you go into this steak restaurant. The steak restaurant was in the Don Chula's. You know, like a Don Chula? Yeah. Like his restaurant? Yeah. And so...

You go in there to the steak restaurant, and then it's a glass door. So Ricky comes in and just – I mean, the door – it's a 400-pound glass door that just comes off the hinge, and Ricky just – he's like got it up against his face, like just holding it. And Travis just looks at him. He's like – because his door is broke. Yeah.

What a strong guy, though. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Then Travis went over and helped. Then his kid came. That's who you want driving the bus. That guy can handle things. Oh, yeah. Ricky can do it all. Yeah. And so then they had to like hold the door. Then that entrance was just shut off for the rest of the night. So we put a stop to that. He didn't break it. Something was wrong with it. But yeah, it was fun. But-

I've officially got my, I'm back to my starting weight, almost back to when we started. I'm 185.

All right, we can start over. Start over. Yeah, we can start over. I'm starting today. Yeah. You're back in it. I'm back in it. What are you at, Brian? 185. Okay. Oh, look at that. I mean, I never moved. Were you at 185 back then, too? Yeah. All right, we're back in it. All right, here we go. Round two. What's the race to? What are we racing back down to? Mine's going to fluctuate. I mean, at least I'm going to go back to 160. I was 160 when I shot the special. Wow.

And I might even go below. I'm going to go and see what my body does. I can't believe you gained that much. Doesn't look like it. No. I have. And it's tough, man. It is such a letdown. It breaks my heart. I know. It's so sad. Yeah. That's the hardest thing.

I mean, I, and I'm at a point where I'm like, I'm not going to, you know, have Eric on the road with me. Even if you can have someone, you know, you'd think I'll just have someone on the road with me that does this, but he doesn't, you got to do it and understand it on your own. Right. Cause it's like, then we get off the road and then I come here and I eat a 32 ounce granola with yogurt. I mean, I'm eating like a full pizza worth of yogurt and granola. It's like, how do you even get these things that are healthy? Yeah.

Combine them to make them unhealthy. It takes work. It takes a lot of work. I don't know that granola is that great for you. They really sell it. They really push it on us like it's good for us. And I don't think it is. Oh, it's so good. That's why it's not. It tastes good. You put all that sugar and honey on it. Oh, man, that is.

fun. I ran into Shea the other day and I didn't recognize him. He has totally changed. Shea Mooney, Dan and Shea. Shea was on the podcast. Go look at that podcast and go look at Shea now. Shea, we just golfed last week and he is tiny. Tiny. He weighs 140, I think.

Wow. Look at that picture right there. You've got a before and after right here. Look at it. I'd like to say I started all this because I lost weight before he did. Looking like Bert Kreischer. I got down and then he started doing it. So I'd like to say I was the start of Shea. I'd call him fat a lot to his face. He's got a Bert Kreischer before body. That is very effective. It's a very effective strategy to have your friends call you fat to your face. Yeah, yeah.

People are against it, but I can tell you it works. Yeah, Shea looks crazy, dude. He looks so good. I mean, just looking at him.

And yeah, I'm back to that Shays body before. I wish my nipples looked like that. You know what's tough is scrolling through your phone and you have a bunch of before pictures like that that there was just never an aftertaste. Because you were like, here we go. And you take the picture and you forget about it. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to go. I'm making a big, I got to, my mindset's got to change to be like, I'm starting to run.

So I want to be a runner, and I want to be...

I just want to be able to be healthy and be like your... I think your mind, dude, gets... With food, your mind gets all foggy and you're just not... And you think... It's the same way when I stop drinking. When you stop drinking, you think, well, I'm going to lose who I am and what makes me a comic and all this kind of stuff. And so you feel like an identity with food, too, that you go, well, I'm not going to go to McDonald's. If I'm not going to McDonald's or stuff, am I even the person...

You think, hey, that's real, man. Yeah, you do. You believe that. Oh, I know. What do I do with my nights? It is true. Yeah. I've gone through that with drinking, cigarettes, food, all sorts of things where you give it up and you think, oh, well, I'm, yeah, now I won't, what will I even joke about? Yes. How do I make jokes if I feel good all the time? Yeah. But you go do more stuff and you're just trying to like,

Not, you know, your body's just, it's just so hard, man. We're so addicted. I am so addicted to sugar. It's insane. And it's frustrating to be like so, like, you know, I mean, dude, so my plan was I have a before picture from Red Rocks.

So when I started losing this weight, it was February of – so my special 22 – was it February of 22? February of 22. Yeah, my special came out this year, 23, taped it in 22. So it was February of 22, and I was doing the Paramount Theater in Denver. And so we drove to Red Rocks just to go see it. And it was the day I started working out, so we took –

We took a before picture, a before body picture that day. And we're like, all right. And I was like in my head, I'm like, all right, you know what? Next time I come here, I'm going to have an after body and I'm going to be playing Red Rocks. Yeah. Wow. Well, I'm going to Red Rocks in May. Sold out. 9,000 people. And I am back to my before body. And it was,

Breaks my heart. But if you had to choose one of the two to have come true, it's like the right one happened. Maybe meant to be. Yes, maybe meant to be. But it's the letdown in your own, like to go, you can't even control the easier one to control.

The harder one might be to get the tickets to sell the tickets and become good enough to do that. Yeah, that's definitely harder. But the one that's like just don't. That's definitely harder than losing 20 pounds. Yes. You can just have a cardboard cutout when you're at 165, put it on stage, and mission accomplished. Dude, I would have been, there's a chance I could have been shredded by the time. We still got two months, man. Yeah. Don't sell yourself short. I mean, I have to go on.

I mean, I just basically can't eat. Maybe double down. Be heavier. Go 225. Yeah. Go big. That's true. Yeah. You know, you're like, I sold this out. Who needs to lose weight? Yeah. Yeah. That is true. Yeah. I can do it. We'll all do it. Let's do a weight gain challenge. Oh, I like this. Yeah. Let's switch it up a bit, huh? Started off with a Krispy Kreme challenge. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, look, I like eating all this stuff. I don't think I'll ever not eat McDonald's. But it's just your relationship with food's got to be much different. It's got to be you know what you're doing and the mindset's got to be different. And I want to be able to get into that stuff. It is sugar, though. Sugar's the death. It's crazy, dude. Sugar's... I did a show Friday night. I was listening to Dusty's podcast.

in the car on the way home. I was in a McDonald's drive-thru while Dusty talked about how McDonald's is poison. It did not deter me one bit. Well, I don't talk about it a lot on this podcast because I know this is a very favorable McDonald's podcast. So I don't talk about it. If anything, it made me want to get it more. I don't diss McDonald's when I'm here. Yeah. Yeah. Good. You know where your bread and butter is. You're not on this side of the table anymore. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's tough. It makes it where you do want, you know. And look, I do think about that a lot. Like, I don't know, what if I do get healthy? And like, I'm not trying to say I want to be like, I don't want to be jacked. I'd like to be where you're that in shape where you just look good. And like, you can't even really tell when you have a jacket on stage. But I think I can do more if I'm healthy.

In that shit, you know, like sometimes people like, you know, people too, they're like, oh, I liked it. I liked Fat Nate was funnier and like all this stuff. And you're like, but you're like, dude, I'm trying not to. Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to go to the cities to come do shows. Like I can't, I will have to quit. Yeah. You have to go. I can't physically do it. It's so, when you're on the road so much,

It's brutal, dude. People that are listening to this, there's probably a ton of people that travel. A lot of truck drivers listen to this. You know how hard it is for those guys? It's impossible.

Because you just are like, what are you going to, you're bored. You got to go to a lot of gas stations and all this stuff. You just, you know, it's insane. Yeah, and gas stations, even the truck stops, are not bringing in a lot of healthy options. They're not, they got a lot of hot dogs on the roller. Yeah. I mean, you have to like do a lot of things. You got to make your own kind of thing. And so it's like the mindset has to be healthy.

Like, you got to just, you know, be like, all right. You know, we were reading something to Eric this week, and there's a book called Atomic Habits. And I was like, I started reading, and then I told Eric about it because I was trying to basically be like, why don't you read it, and then we can talk about it. So I don't have to.

But a lot of it is like the minds – some of it's a mindset. Like, you just got to be like – if I'm a – like, if I want to start running, I just am like, I'm a runner. Like, if you ask me something to go do, I'm like, well, I'm a runner. I got to run today. I'm a guy that runs. And you just start saying you're this guy. And you live like that guy. And like, so it's – instead of being like, I'm trying to start running. Mm-hmm.

Because then you're like, well, now you've already, I won't do it. You've given yourself an out a little bit. Yeah, yeah. I'm talking a little bit of this on stage at the beginning. But it's like, yeah, I can find, I'm not saying that I'm a runner thing. Like, I'm not just starting with super positive. I go, let me tell you something, guys. Look at this crowd, and I don't want to look like you just make me so mad. No.

They're all super healthy and everybody's in good shape. You know, you see, I've never been healthy. I've never done it. 44 years, never worked out, never, you know. I mean, I did it for the special, and I had the motivation for that special, and then I hit it, and it just slowly, I just couldn't stop the old me. Mm-hmm.

I didn't go like, all right, dude, we're now 160. We're a body that's 160s, and that's what we are. And now let's work out and keep it going. I just slowly went the other way. Specials in the can. Specials in the can. Welcome back, Nate. I think you argue there in one time on this podcast that keeping it off is not as hard as keep going. And I would say most people would say keeping it off is the hard part. Yeah.

I think they're both. Yeah. They're both very hard. Yeah, because it's easy to feel good about your progress that you made and be like, all right, I did it. That's why they say it like AA, right? They say you get a chip for the – when you go in, you get a chip for the first month, you get a chip for the second month because the second month is where people start to convince themselves that now that they've quit drinking, now they're like, oh, I can quit anytime. Right.

I've already quit. I've accomplished this. So now I can go back to drinking because I can quit whenever I want. Maybe don't give a chip the first month then. Well, I think you get it, you know, you get a chip for coming in and you get a chip for 30 days and then you get, you know, the second month chip is like, all right, you've made a, you've hit a milestone, but don't turn back now. Right. Yeah. Well, that was like the drinking, uh,

It's just understanding what this stuff is. And that's the same with food. It's like just understanding what it is and just being like, you know, there's, you think you're like, you just feel like you're, you don't, you don't have, you don't have any energy and you don't have any like drive to go do anything. And you just feel like you're like, the world's trying to keep you like that just to be like, you don't, you know, achieve anything. And then if you grow up any, you know,

Where that's not New York or like, you know, and now, especially growing up when we grew up, I mean, there just weren't restaurants. There wasn't, you know, all these like new restaurants or new places to go eat or all this. You had to go to like, either you went and made stuff at home or you went to McDonald's or you went to, if it was like a big trip, you get to go to O'Charlie's or something like, you know. And then, but there's no...

You weren't, you know, they didn't have, I can't think. Applebee's was a big deal in the night. I mean, I know you worked there, but yeah, the 90s, I mean, it was a nice restaurant that you would, you know, it'd be like really fancy to go to. Yeah. For my family, it was. We had a place called Ryan's. Oh, yeah. I know where she is. That was a big deal. I tore up some Ryan's, man. Yeah, Ryan's was great.

Ryan's Golden Corral, Western Sizzlin'. Yeah. Is it Sizzlin' or Sizzler? Well, there's the Sizzler out west, but in Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee, there's the Western Sizzlin'. Little apostrophe at the end. No G. Sizzlin'. I like Sizzler better. I've never been to Sizzler, but I worked at Western Sizzler. I've done the name. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Are they the same person? I don't think so. Wow. I think we would call it the Sizzler sometimes. It does have a cool name, the Sizzler. It's easier to say. Western Sizzling is kind of difficult to say. The Sizzler sounds like a drink to me. It's like an icy. Let's go get a Sizzler at the 7-Eleven. Oh, yeah. That's what it sounds like to me. Like a lot of, yeah, like 7-Up. I think I associate it with Western Sizzler too much. What about Ponderosa? Ponderosa.

I've been to a Ponderosa. Yeah, that was good. Lebanon had a Ponderosa and a Western Sizzling. Well, that's money. If you have money, you go to Ponderosa. Yeah, yeah. So we went to Western Sizzling. Yeah, yeah. But then they passed liquor by the drink, I think, in the early 90s, and we got an O'Charlie's and Applebee's. It was a big time. Yeah. But we didn't go because we protest. Oh, because they're drinking? Yeah. We went to an – I went on like a –

retreat with my dad, like his, his company, he won an award and they got to go to a trip and it was a bunch of people from his work. And we went to an Oh Charlie's one night and like hamburgers were like 10 bucks. And my dad was not broke, but he got really fired up about it being a $10 hamburger. And it was a big deal. A fight happened.

The next year, same situation. My dad refused to go to O'Charlie's. So me, him, and my stepmom went to a Shoney's and ate a $7 hamburger to avoid the $10 hamburger at O'Charlie's. We ate alone as opposed to eating with the group. We saved $9. Yeah.

Yeah. And yeah. And yeah. Wait, so y'all left? We were like, they were all like, we're going to O'Charlie's. And my dad got mad. He's like, I will never go to O'Charlie's again. I still don't eat there now because of this. Yeah. I mean, I'm with my dad. It's principal, but it was, it was kind of like, I was like, I'll throw you the nine bucks just so we can eat with the rest of the people. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I mean, it was, I mean, O'Charlie's, it is uppity. Uh, I talked to a guy, uh, this weekend, uh,

Who doesn't – Steak and Shake, I guess, has a thing where you order – it's not people coming to your table anymore. Oh, yeah. Oh. And so – That was part of the charm of it. It was like a diner. Yeah. And so he just went in there and he goes, oh, I went in there and told them all I got. These are taking people's jobs. And then just like lost it. You know, not like angrily, but like just like to his wife's like, oh, gosh. And he's like – and he couldn't – and they left. He goes, we won't eat here because he goes, this is –

You're just having these computers work for people and you're taking people's jobs. I don't like that that's happening. I saw somebody just do that at McDonald's. Yeah. You could only order on one of those mobile screens at this particular McDonald's. And this older guy, he was just like, uh-uh. I'm at it. I think he was just mad that he couldn't order. Probably harder to order. He's like, yeah, just tell somebody. Yeah, you just want to sometimes go, I don't want to go –

I like it sometimes because it's like I'm going to be no one. I'm going to do all these like no things. So you like to kind of do the screen because you're like, I don't feel bad about doing it, telling someone. But I do understand too when you're like, yeah, dude, like an older person going in or I'm going to be that older. You know, you're going to be like, I don't know how to do this. Yeah.

So Steak and Jake spent $50 million to eliminate table service at its restaurants in favor of self-service ordering. And it kind of worked for them. They had three years of losses. And since then, they've posted profits of $11.5 million, $13.5 million. They also closed a lot of stores, too. I mean, I just physically saw them disappear. We lost the one in Hermitage. Oh, yeah. Whataburger showed up. Yeah.

I just ate at the one, Darrell Walter Ponda. When I go there, I go across the street to that Steak and Shake. And yeah, you got to order on the screen and then they just yell your name. You go up there and get your food. Is it no tipping? I'm sure they still want to tip. No, I think I...

I think I paid there at the thing, and I don't remember. Yeah. Give it some time. The machine will want a tip. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Well, I had that parking machine ask for a tip. It was the craziest thing I've ever seen. Where? In Houston. I had a parking garage. It was like $30 a night, and then I swiped my card at the end, and it asked for a tip.

For a machine. I didn't interact with a human being the whole time. Yeah. I was furious, dude. I put $0 tip. Oh, yeah. Got out of there. I had a guy at a car wash do that to me. Like, it's like a self-serve thing, but he came up to help me. And I'm like, it was irritating to me. I'm like, I got it. I know how to work the car. And then he goes, do you want a tip? And I go, well, what do you do? He goes, oh, you don't have to tip if you don't want to. And I go, well, no. Well, what do you do? Yeah. He goes, oh, we just, you know.

He didn't really... I was like, well, no, then. I don't... He didn't even... We just help out and... I was like, I go through a machine. Nobody's washing the car. Yeah. Well, yeah, you're tipping for like the... You're like, well, we have to like shut the building down tonight. Yeah. Like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Like that tip to the, yeah, that one, the parking thing, you want a tip to go like, I'd like to follow this bunny. Where's that going? Yeah. Who's getting the money for this? Yeah. Because I did not see a human being in this parking garage. There's AI in there. He's like, tip me. Yeah. Chat GB too. Yeah, yeah. I feel like sometimes they have this setting like from something. Like, I wonder if it's like, you know, like a setting from, you're doing like a restaurant thing.

check system that has a spot for tipping and then you're like... And they just haven't changed over? I think they just go, let's just see if any idiots actually throw a tip. Just leave it on there. And people do, I bet. Oh, yeah. I probably would get caught. Like, you just...

Anybody can make you tip. I mean, a guy could walk up like that, like that gassed, you know, unless you're going to be confrontational, like come from the slaves. This is what they do. They're used to people walking up and being like, oh, I'll talk to you about it. But most people, you know, or some people, like you could just feel pressured and be like, okay, yeah, $2.00.

you know you something and they're like oh thank you know and then you just feel uncomfortable yeah yeah i mean that place it's like there's a thing where i do the stuff and the guy's coming up to the window helping me and i'm like i don't need help here i need you've made it more touch the yeah so you've made this more complicated for me i just want to pull up here and you're out here taking my card and asking me what car wash i want i'm like just let me look at it yeah all

All right. I wonder if they already go and start doing, they do tipping where it's like you're just not, businesses like, well, just don't pay the minimum of the workers or something. You know, a model I've seen a lot, I see it on mostly with software. Like I'll download an app or something and it has variable pricing where you just choose how much you want to pay for it. It'd be like $8, $24, $38. Yeah.

And a surprising amount of people don't pay the minimum. They're like, I actually like this product. I'll just pay more for it. Wow. Wait, what is it? Oh. It's variable pricing. You download the app and then you decide how much you want to pay for it.

For what? For like, I had this old, they're like web development apps that I used to use that were variable pricing. Huh. You just got to choose how much you paid. Yeah, it's not for like a shirt or something. No, no. And no matter what you pay, it'll be the same thing you're getting. Yeah, it'll be the same thing. You just decide.

Yeah. That's interesting. And if you're genuinely like, this is a small company that makes this app, I want to support them. I'll pay a little more for it. Yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't do it, but some people did. Yeah.

Yeah, that kind of stuff. You know, there was a coffee shop in Opelika that I went to one time and I ordered a cup of coffee and I was like, what does it cost? And they go, whatever you want, just pay whatever you want. And I'm like, I don't like that. Was it a Christian coffee shop? I don't know. They didn't seem overwhelmingly Christian. They weren't really putting it out there. Yeah.

But then like pay whatever you want. I'm like, don't do me like that. You know what I mean? Because now I feel inclined to pay a little more so that I don't seem cheap. Right. Yeah. You know, I'm paying $5 a cup now because I'm like, well, I don't know. I feel weird about it. Coffee shops, there's no music. They're just, it's quiet. You're staring right at the person.

Yeah, I thought of it this weekend. I bought some new golf balls, the Pro-V ones, which they have a new one that they came out with. Pro-V is the most expensive ball.

And I haven't like completely, I mean, I always play like, I've played Callaway. I played like a bunch of different golf balls. But like I started thinking about it. Some reason it hit me. I was with Justin Smith meeting him riding around and it just, it hit me as I had a ball go, you know, a lot like into the rough stuff. And I'm like, this is $5 a ball. Yeah.

And I don't know if it's like I'm getting, it's almost like I made my 44 year old showed up and it's never showed up until right then. And I thought this is $5 a ball. Yeah.

And you're like, am I even good enough to even know the difference or all this stuff? And then you're like, these balls are so expensive. Do you still lose a lot of balls when you play? I mean, how many balls would you lose in a normal round of golf? I mean, it can, you know, I'm like. I'll burn through 20 or 30. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. You lose that many balls in a ball? Oh, yeah. I can be. It's been what I'm doing. Like, if it's not going, I could easily lose.

Five, six balls. That'd be $100 or more for that. Well, I'm not. I'm hitting balls I stole from the driving range. I'm not. Yeah. I don't have tireless V1s out there. Yeah, yeah. But it makes you go like, oh, yeah, if you're having whatever rounds, you're like, maybe I need to just use some other. They're so expensive. $5 every time you hit that thing.

Just for some comparison, Aaron's saying he's losing 20 to 30. How many are you saying you're losing? I mean, you would hope to – it depends on the day, the course. At least, you know, I don't know. I could have some – the other day I played, I didn't lose – I lost one. Okay. But then I've lost like three. But, I mean, I can easily lose like – I've had days recently where it's just I'm not – I'm just –

It's not together, and I've lost like six. Yeah. And that's 30 bucks on top of – So a bad day for you, you lost six. Yeah. That's a very bad – I've played with you where you've not lost any. Yeah. Okay. So I just – well, I never golfed, so I just want to get an idea. 10 to – or 20, 30 is – Yeah, some important context here is Nate's a way better golfer than I am. Yeah, yeah. Just keep that in mind. But it would be – yeah. But it could be that. It's that. But, you know –

And you can lose a ball in the fairway. You can lose it. I get so impatient. I'm like, if I don't see it right away, I might as well just drop another one. I'm not keeping score anyway, dude. I go to Walmart and just buy a giant bag of balls, and they're like mixed, just different. And you and I were playing one time with Henry Cho. Yeah.

And he needed a ball. And he's like, give me a ball. And I tossed him one. And it was like a Wilson. He's like, I'm not hitting this. He made me go get him a real ball. He threw it back to me. What makes...

You know, what really – what's the difference in a Wilson? Not even like a Titleist, the best. What's the difference in a Wilson and a – You can feel if it's a really cheap ball. You can just feel it. It gets marked up pretty quick. I mean, a cheaper ball will break a lot. It gets scuffed up. It gets scuffed up, and, like, you can have cuts in it pretty quickly. Where, like, a Pro-V, that's the thing, though. Besides losing it, if you're not losing it, a Pro-V, you can hit it a lot longer, and it's not going to –

It's supposed to go farther, faster. Yeah, they're doing a thing where they're trying to roll back the balls for the pros. Okay. Like they're trying to make balls that are not going to go as far.

Because everything's going too far now. Like the wooden bat with the baseball. Yes. Or tennis. There's been talk about going back to wooden tennis rackets. Really? Because they're hitting too far? Because they serve so fast that there's not even a lot of volume. It's just, you know, power. Yeah. They think it'd make it more interesting. Power's pretty fun, though. Yeah. Yeah, but it's after like three, you'd be like, okay. Somebody returned the serve. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.

All right. We still do you guys comments. Madison Hill. I would have bet my life that we would never get a guy on this podcast more well-versed in the subject matter than Greg Warren and his grocery store products. I stand corrected. Corrected.

The confidence in which Mike spoke about the mafia was mind-blowing. Never once was he stumped or stuttered on any response or question that was put his way. He could easily be an adjunct professor in a mafia class at an elite university. That is true. He was very good at what he does. It was something because it was like, you know, I wanted to like throw in jokes, but I'm like, Mike really knows what he's talking about. There's not really a lot of room for error. Yeah. Yeah. It's interesting. Interesting.

Matt Budd, I'm not sure how I feel about having a guest who is actually knowledgeable about the topic. Can we go back to summer interns and people who work with Nate's sister? That's true. Yeah.

Mike was too much. He knew too much. It is better if he'd know less. Like, that's what I thought coming into this. I'm like, I know nothing about the mafia. This will be fun. I had no idea Mike was a real expert. I would like to check in with Mr. Giada at some point, see what he's up to. Bigfoot expert. Oh, yeah. We forgot his actual name. Oh, yeah. We call him the Bigfoot guy so often. But I think about that guy a lot. Yeah. How's he doing? Yeah. Yeah.

Michael DeLazer. DeLazer. DeLazer. We absolutely need a part two. The fact Lucky Luciano was barely mentioned and Al Capone was completely left out as criminal. No pun intended. Yeah, another great show we didn't talk about. Boardwalk Empire. Yeah. Both of those characters in that. Which friend of the podcast Nick Novicki was on. Yeah. Yeah, he was at our house.

when he was doing it. Oh, really? Yeah, he'd stay with us. Michael Mitchell. I've told that story about going to that after party, right? I think so. I think so, yeah. Michael Mitchell. Instead of searching for the actor in Black Mass, I'm pretty sure Dusty was just watching some YouTube conspiracy videos.

The responsibility distracted him so much. He is so much more involved when Aaron does the web searches. Yeah, I'm telling you. The computer is too much pressure. Yeah. It is too much pressure. Well, people get mad. I see comments all the time. They go, they're sitting there talking about stuff that Aaron can just look it up. Well, that kind of just kills the conversation. Yes. You can look stuff up right away. It's a balance. Yeah, you don't want to look up stuff right away. You want to have the conversation. Josh Foote.

Footy. Foot. Foot. Which is probably Josh Foot. Probably. With an E. They put an E. I think that's how Shelby Foot. I think that's how he spells his name. You know Shelby Foot? Uh-uh. He's a historian. Oh.

Why would I know? He's in a lot of the Ken Burns documentaries. I've never listened to anything about Ken Burns. I've never listened to Ken Burns. Well, you would watch him. He has documentaries. I've never watched any of it. I always hear about him. I've never read any Ken Burns stuff. Yeah, I'm sure he wrote. He wrote a book? He probably wrote a book. Not that I know. He's famous for documentaries. You'd watch it. I bet he wrote a book. But there's a guy, Shelby Foote, who might be related to Josh Foote. Mm-hmm.

I feel like it's when your last name's Foote and they're like, we're getting destroyed over here. They go, we're throwing you at the end of it. You got to church it up a bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Shelby Foote. I mean, doesn't that look like a guy that you'd want to hear history from? You don't recognize him at all? No. No.

I don't even know what Ken Burns looks like. That guy looks like everybody I've ever seen. Well, Ken Burns has an interesting look. Yeah, Ken Burns is odd looking. Where would you watch Ken Burns at? PBS. So y'all all watched him a lot, Dusty? I never watched him. Yeah.

College educated watchers. Yes, yes. That's exactly. I watched the one on baseball and one on country music. I hear he did a good one on country music. I would like to watch it, but I've never watched it. I think, yeah, it's a college thing. Yeah, I think so. The educated. Yeah, you guys wouldn't understand. I like a documentary made in a basement somewhere. That's my style. Yeah. I like some rough cuts. I want a guy that, your documentary needs to be this.

The FBI is probably about to knock on his door. There's a chance they're outside. Yeah. You want a made-up iMovie. Yeah, you got to watch it today because it might be deleted. Yeah. Oh, Josh Foote. For about a 48-hour period in 2003, the world thought that Jimmy Hoffa had been buried in my aunt and uncle's crawlspace in Bay City, Michigan.

A guy who's writing a book from prison about the old Teamster boss claimed that he hid Hoffa's body in my family's home back. What? In my family's home back? Home back when he owned the home. Oh. I'd say when you look at some words and then it's almost like I just forgot the context of the sentence I was in. And then you're like, well, that doesn't make sense at all. The old Teamster boss claimed that he hid Hoffa's body in my family's home back when he owned the home.

I did not expect another home to be in that sentence. He should have went with house on that second one. Right. It's not a great sentence, to be fair. There wasn't... He's like... This guy's like, I'm typing in a comment and I'm not writing a book. You know? And...

Guy that can't get through it. We're like, all right, let me clean this sentence up. Yeah, it's your fault, Josh. Josh. There was, in fact, a body in the crawl space wrapped in a garbage bag, but it was not Hoffa. My uncle and cousin would regularly go in the crawl space to put mice in pest repellent and had no idea they were right above a victim. Wow. We got video of this. Oh, man. Got some. What do they got growing there, Dusty? Maybe some grapes?

Muscadines? Yeah, some muscadines. Muscadines. All right. Yeah. Pretty crazy. I don't know if we get to watch the entire night. You're like, you started with that weather of that night. Watch an entire news show. It's a one-minute long video. Yeah. It's a minute 40. A minute, you know. We got 20 seconds in. Yeah. We made it 20 seconds. Yeah.

And we're just moving on from it. Like, that's funny. You'd be like, let's watch it. And you go, all right. All right. Steven Vitry. Vitry. My mom was a hairdresser in Haworth, New Jersey. She had this one customer who came in twice a week for a blowout. And even though she came so often, her husband always came along. So my mom built a relationship with both of them. One day, my mom was watching TV and sees a...

This guy's face on the screen, her customer's husband was the Iceman. That's wild, dude. Yeah, I mean, if the husband's coming with the wife every hairdresser appointment, there's something going on. Yeah. They don't just have that good of a relationship. Yeah.

There's something going on. Yeah. That's crazy. I mean, that's got to be. Not that Iceman. That's got to be such a. He was like. Yeah, like it's cold in here. Yeah. It's fun. I bet she's glad she was nice to him. Yeah. Man. Yeah. Just see that later on. Be like, you're just with pure evil. Yeah. Yeah.

I wonder if you could tell. I wonder if the wife kept coming in for the haircut, though. I bet you look back and things make sense. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you never think that at the time. But once you find out, you're like, maybe he did act a little weird that one time. Well, even like Dusty said, the fact he comes every time with her. I don't know what that means, but something's weird. I've not been with my wife one time to get her haircut. Yeah. Almost wouldn't even know where she got it. Yeah. I don't know where mine goes either. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

So every time, you're like, this guy doesn't have a job? Yeah. Mike Vecchione shaves his own head, stands over a newspaper, and does it in his house. So that's maybe the opposite of... Stands over a newspaper? Yeah, so the hair doesn't get everywhere. Oh, okay. Yeah.

just shaves his... To the middle of his living room or what? Yeah. Yeah, I think he takes all his clothes off and stands over a newspaper and just grinds it in. That's impressive. He is... I'm just saying, he's the opposite of this. Yeah. He's the Iceman. He tells Katie to leave while he does it. Yeah. His girl goes, I'm also there when he gets a haircut. And you're like, because he's a psycho. He does it...

Brooke Bonano. Hey, folks. Direct Mafia dissent here. Ascendant. Oh, descendant. As soon as I saw the topic of the podcast this week, I immediately knew Nate was going to butcher my last name. I've heard it said a million different ways, but go Nate for keeping it original and dyslexic.

Usually it's annoying, but this time I couldn't feel more honored. I absolutely love you guys. Thanks for making a hard week better. All right. That's one of the five families. Bonino. I think it was the Bonano family. Bonano. Yeah. Bonano. Wow. That's crazy. It's crazy. Yeah, you really don't even want to make fun of this guy's comment because you're like, well, you've really given us some information there at the beginning. Brooke might be a girl. Yeah. So you're in trouble, Dusty. Well, I know a guy named Brooke.

Do you? I do know a guy named Brooks. Yeah. He doesn't spell it with the E. Yeah, I think that probably distinguishes it. Yeah, it's probably a pretty big difference. Garrett Moore, Two Thumbs Borghese is a perfect mob name. I agree. Yeah. I agree. Josh Fox, hey, Bear. I'm glad Dusty's back. All right. I grew up in an RV park in Florida and then lived in a trailer park in Georgia for years.

Good to have someone on this pod for our kind of people. We're having a good time here. Well, that's true. Although RV is pretty fancy in my view. See, I would have thought that'd be moving up to go from an RV park to a trailer park, but you think it's the opposite. Yeah, I think that the RV being so mobile. I mean, like I know that they call a trailer a mobile home, but it's not that mobile. No. You're there. Yeah. The police can come get you. Yeah. RV. RV.

You can move your address quick. Yeah. I mean, you can be out of town in no time. Abby Wainwright. Dusty basically said, so I went to this place called Cookie Dough Magic.

And I was shocked to see they served me cookie dough instead of ice cream. Well, it's true. That's true. It's a fair point. There's no justifying it. But when I typed in ice cream on Google and cookie dough magic came up. And then I went there and they had the cooler set up like it was ice cream. But inside was cookie dough. And you look at this. I mean, that looks like cookie dough. I mean, that looks like ice cream. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like...

But you put a spoon in there and eat some of it, and you're like, this is warm. Well, I think that particular picture we're looking at is cookie dough in ice cream. But if you look at some of these other, I mean, that's pretty clear. Do they serve ice cream at all? They did not at the place I went to. And it also closed. It looks like they're doing pretty good now. Where's the – Trussville, Alabama? In Huntsville, Alabama, they did not care for it. Yeah, smooth as cookie dough you could imagine.

The roughness is what I always had a problem with. Try our cookie dough in a cone cup milkshake or sundae. I'd eat cookie dough. It's not smooth enough, dude. They have dough cream. So that's probably the dough cream.

Yeah. But it's cookie dough magic. I mean, it's being like, hey, we're doing cookie dough here and that's what we do. I mean, it is true. I mean, they let you know. That is my mistake. How do you feel about doing a free sample? I always judge people that do free samples at these places.

It's like part of it is you just, if it's, you know, you might not like it. Yeah, but I think part of it is the fun of like, let me try that. You know, you want to go holding up the line for 20 minutes. I think you're allowed one or two free samples. I would say one or two. But if you're doing all of them, it's too much. Yeah, just the whole one or two. Yeah, that's good. I'll do it.

I could never do that. Let's try the Rocky Road. I'll have vanilla. That's delicious, but I'll have vanilla. Well, you're a guy that's going in there like clocking in, clocking out. You're there to do work. Most people are treating it like a vacation. So yeah, I would be annoyed too. Let's go. You're walking in there like it's your job. Doing four or five samples. You're like, enough. Enough. I need...

I mean, they should just have you, the usual. And they just hand it to you and you walk out. You're there for business. They're there for pleasure.

That's the difference. Yeah. And I would understand the frustration of, I've gone to places and you're frustrated with everybody being fun. Yeah. And you're like, I've got a problem here. Right. And so I'm here to fix this problem. And I know what I want. I want chocolate. I want to eat out of my way. And I want to get about my day and go eat this in my car alone and order a large and act like I'm giving it to other people. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Chandler Rapper, I guess. R-A-P-E-R. Man. We stopped it there. I mean, how is anybody not saying it that way? I don't know. Could be. Give that E to it. Rappier. It better be Reaper or something. Yeah. Rappier. Maybe it's Rappier. You hope it is. You hope it is. That's a tough last name. Man, what a life. Yeah.

Vincent Dufrio was in Full Metal Jacket, The Breakup, Men in Black, and Law and Order. And Dusty went with, he played the Thor guy in Adventures in Babysitting. Classic Nate Leonard.

Well, I thought it was fun that he ended up in another superhero TV show later. And then so back in the day, he played kind of a Thor character in that movie. But you're right. That's a good point, though. He has a lot of great movies. And I went with this one bit part when he was very young. This guy's great, though. Yeah. Card Ye West. Card Ye West. I'm an artist who does smaller scale stuff.

I've recently found enjoyment in creating using artificial intelligence. So I made this recent card I call the Bright Future Set. Photo attached. There it is. Oh, wow. We've got the Nate Lynn crew as babies. Wow. That's crazy. I love how Brian is not really a baby. Yeah. Brian.

Brian's got a little... He's got a Benjamin Button situation going on. For sure. I do like... I love these. Yeah. They look very cool. That really does look like you. Yeah. I bet if you lined that up with one of your childhood pictures. Well, your dad commented and said it looked nothing like you, but... Oh, okay. I look Asian in there, I think.

I think it looks most like Nate if you just said, guess who these people are. Right. I look like Augustus Gloop. Yeah, I don't really think it looks like you. Yeah, do you got a little stuff on the side of your mouth like you just ate something? I do. Yeah, you do. Got a little cookie dough magic on the side of the lips there. Yeah, it does look like you. What kind of hat are you wearing there, Dusty? I don't know. It looks like a fish. I look Asian. I got like a fisherman's hat there. I'll tell you what, I'm on board with all of them. Yeah. I think they all look great.

I'm ready to man a boat out here. Baits is great. Yeah. Those are a lot of fun. Those are fun. That's awesome. This week we're talking about pranks and practical jokes. This Saturday is April Fool's Day, so that'd be a good time to talk about it. Dusty, I think a few weeks ago in the podcast, you kind of identified the origin of April Fool's. Do you remember? Yeah.

Well, I mean, well, my belief, I don't know if it's true, but my belief is that, you know, April used to be the first month, at least in a sense. That was when the new year came in. So, and it makes sense when life is new and things are springing out of the ground and things are coming back to life. So they changed the calendar from April 1st being the new year to January. So anybody that kept celebrating April 1st as a new year was called April Fool's.

That's the most popular theory. They went from the Julian calendar to the Gregorian calendar. We all know that, right? Everybody knows it. A lot of people didn't get the word. So April 1st rolls around, they're celebrating New Year's and people would make fun of them. Like, you're a fool. Yes. They put a fish on your back.

And it makes so much more sense that, did they put a fish on your back? Yeah. Like your real gin, just a guppy. Oh. Goable. They'd walk up and just put a fish on your back? Yeah, like slap it on your back. Like a kid would put like a sign that says kick me? Yeah, I think so. I think so. They'd just slap a fish on your back. Because the new year was April 1st? Yeah. What a weird reason to bully somebody. When did they change it?

1582. Did it make a big announcement? Like, how could you back then? Yeah. Yeah, so I mean, how do people even know? I just think it makes sense, right? It's like when things are coming to life. I mean, January 1st. I mean, it does not feel like a... Yeah, it does make sense. It feels like a real dead time. Yeah. Yeah. You want to go back to the Julian calendar. Yeah.

I mean, that's how I do now anyway. I don't yell it out loud. I don't want people to fish on me. You really? You shoot fireworks? Yeah, but I feel like, yeah, I mean, I like that. I like to go with that. Saturday's going to be a big day for you. Yeah. I mean, you know, I'll be alone, but, you know, I'll be doing comedy, but nobody will be celebrating with me. You think you're dressed a little better? Yeah. Yeah.

Maybe so. I'll be at Comedy Works in Denver. I don't know that anyone is going to celebrate with me, but I may come out and pop a confetti balloon just to see if people- Friday night? Happy New Year's. Do a countdown so he joins in? Yeah, just see if they'll get into it. Yeah. Happy New Year's. Yeah. So do you have a favorite practical joke or prank? Because I found-

I'll go ahead and tell you. I found an article from last year from LA Magazine where they ask you and your dad. Yeah. Do you remember this? Yeah. Do you remember what you said? No. Lotion and conditioner? Yeah, yeah. I did Kurt Metzger. We were on the road years ago, and I was opening for Kurt. And back when you didn't, I would open. It was like Kurt would be headlining, and I'd be opening. We would have to share –

hotel room. And so we were sharing the hotel room. And then, so we were going to go do radio and then Kurt walks, uh, A, Kurt kept calling me his opener all weekend. And like, Kurt's, uh,

older than me in comedy, like about, you know, not much, but he was above me in the scene, but not like, I mean, I was like, like he was with Big Jay and like, so I was like right below was like me, DeRosa, Mike Vecchione, like the newer guys. And then there was Jay and Kurt.

kind of they were right above it. So we, I'd opened for Jay a lot, opened for Kurt a lot. And so we go out and we're doing, we're in like, the whole time he's like, he'd be on the phone and he'd be like, what? He's talking to somebody. He goes, no, it's just my opener. And I'm like, Kurt, we're, A, we're friends. And... That person knows me. You could just told him my name. Yeah, yeah. And then he goes, and so...

We're going to do something. And he was like, hey, where's the lotion at? And I said, it's in there. It says conditioner. He just asked me like the hotel. And he got to go, it says, I said, I go, it should be in the bathroom. Then he goes, is it the conditioner? I go, yeah, yeah, like conditioner for your skin. And so I just said that. And I wasn't doing too crazy. And then I walk over and I mean, he's just rubbing it all over his body.

all over his body. And I was like, that's not it. And he was so mad because we had to leave because we were late. So he just couldn't change or anything. We left and his whole body was sticky. And it made it super funny.

And that, like, Kurt would, yeah. Conditioner for your skin. Oh, yeah. It's ridiculous. And then Kurt had- Well, the question, I mean, even him asking you, is it the conditioner at Psyche? I just take advantage of, like, a situation is what I would do. Kurt would be, like, Kurt was, like, a guy that was, like, I mean, just a real, like, a genius as far as a joke writer. Yeah.

And was one of the comics when I first saw, when I moved to New York, that was, I, I, I was, I just was like, really couldn't believe I was like seeing someone that good. That was, that was us. That was nobody. Like we were all just starting, but it was like, like Jay was always the funniest person I've ever met. And then, uh, Kurt was like, cause they were coming together. They just, you know, from Philly and,

then Kurt was just like the jokes he was saying it was like he just could I was like this is crazy dude like this dude is and like he's extremely dirty like all you know like everybody I don't have a everybody I'm friends with is nobody's really clean except the guys here but uh

But it's like he was just brilliant. And I just was like, I couldn't believe how good someone was. That's how I felt. Shane Gillis was like that now. For the same way I felt when I saw Kurt is when I watched Shane and I was like, golly. It was the exact same. Much different in the fact that I've been doing comedy. Now I'm an older comic. But seeing Shane Gillis was like that where I was like,

I was like, this dude is still, it's, it's just different. Uh, but yeah, that was my big lotion print. And then your dad's was the wheels and I mean at the wheels and doors, sorry, the different debate, the doorknobs and the, yeah, I'm saying that on stage. Oh, so we should get into that. Uh, yeah, right now. I mean, you know, uh, another one he did was, uh,

Well, you guys, let me just say, if you Google, I mean, you've got a lot of pranks that you've played. You talked about in your act. If I just Google it, the most popular one is the McDonald's taking the bite out of the burger. But then you've done numerous to Nick that you've talked about on stage. Yeah. The wolf. The wolf is good. The wolf is good. And I mean, you watched a prank.

Like the Greatest Average American, we showed a prank. Oh, that's true. The Betsy Kerrigan. That's one of my happier moments of just being able to truly show you. We show you, because at the end of it, we show you when it happened. Yeah. Because we were filming. Yeah. And then we thought of, and then I just kept it that way. And then I was like, the first time I say that,

When you see the joke with Nick, the first time I say that is on that stage. Because I was never able to tell that because he was with me the whole time. So, Dusty, you've never seen Nate's comedy, but he has a bit about – That's my favorite running joke. He doesn't know. He's pretty funny. How long have you been doing comedy? You do comedy too? Yeah.

It was when we were on the road doing the drive-in tour, and I can't remember who texted me, but I was outside the bus, and they texted me and said, we're all lying to Nick Novicki and telling him we've never heard of Nancy Kerrigan.

And Tonya Harding and that whole thing. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we've never heard of it. And I remember I walked in and he was like in a fierce debate. Y'all haven't heard of this? I mean, my God. Yeah. We're all just pretending. We were like, wow. That's a crazy story. It's a great thing because it's – on the surface, it is figure skating. So you'd be like, Nick, why would we know figure skaters? Yeah, yeah. But obviously, it's so much bigger than that. So that was a great one. We played one on him while we were on the road. Yeah.

And now you and Nick have been friends for so long and y'all are so close. And we were walking around. I think we were in Dallas. This is Austin. Austin. Okay. We were walking around and you bet Nick, could you ride your bicycle all the way down to the certain location? It's pitch black at night out in this drive-in. And Nick's like, of course I can do that. And he takes off and then you tell everybody, everybody go hide. And we all take off and we go hide.

And I knew – I've known Nick for a while. I think that was the first time you'd really been around Nick much. And to show how good of a person Aaron is, he and I were hiding together and he said –

I don't really feel comfortable doing this. I don't know Nick that well. You come back and remember Nick's blind and it's night. Yeah. So he comes back and we're watching Nick like look around for us and we're all just hiding behind bushes. Yeah. It shows you're a good person because you felt bad about it. We watched him get on the bus and look for everybody and see nobody was there. Then he comes back. Yeah.

We hit for a while. Yeah. Oh, it was great. I do remember that now. It was all in the parking lot. And he thought we were in the bus. We saw him go in. Yeah. Yeah, that was fun. Yeah, it's all – look, I do a lot of pranks with Nick. Lewis with the rollerblades. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, have I not told that? Lewis J. Gomez, whose birthday is April 1st.

he was uh i was weird for gary veder's wedding uh we had to get tuxes at like you know a men's warehouse and so i was there in the city getting a tuck getting fitted for and so lewis calls me and i said he goes where you at i go i'm at men's warehouse and he's like all right i'm gonna come by and i told him i was like all right i'm at this one i told him where i was and then he

calls me and he's at the, he goes, I'm here. I don't see you. He's at the wrong one. I go, they know you're coming. Just ask for Nate. And then I hang up. And then not knowing that Lewis is on rollerblades and,

And so when he first gets there, he's in front of the window, like, rollerblading, like, trying to be funny because he thinks I'm out there watching. And then he comes in with rollerblades, starts rollerblading through the store, and they're like, you can't rollerblade in the store. They're carpeted store. And he goes, it's fine. I'm with Nate. He's in the back. And he's just in there like, we don't know what that means. There is no, like, I don't know, you know, with who. And then he goes, why would he lie to me? And then he's like, well...

He would lie to me about this. And then, yeah, he didn't go. That was my big – I like to let stuff happen. If something's about to happen, like Nick – hiding from Nick at the thing is I don't always do it like that, like where it's like, you know. But I let – like if you're going to do something, I'll let you do it. And then I'll go from there. Even if you know it's not going to go great, yeah. Even if I – yeah, it's like it doesn't make sense what you're doing. But if you're going to –

If, yeah, if you're like, Lewis calls me and says he's at the wrong store. You're like, I'm not going to go, you're at the wrong one. I'll just go, yeah, okay. Well, come on in. I'm here. And then I just hang up and just know it. And then I just picture the, you just having to talk to people and they don't know what you're talking about. And like, you know. Because you told the other story about somebody getting in a car. John F. O'Donnell. Almost got in the wrong car. Almost got in the wrong car and I stopped it. And I always think about that.

He was about to get in. I was on the phone with him. And he goes, is this you? And I go, no, that's. And I was like, and his hand was on the handle of a wrong car. Yeah. So I was like, why did I stop? You should have just let it happen. Yeah. It's like, and it's usually like I'm telling the person I'm like, I'm in a white car and like, like, you know, and they're just, they're just not really thinking. And so then I just let it.

If you're not being aware amongst yourself, I'm going to let you not be aware. I'm going to let you walk into something. Yeah. You know, I enjoy that. Uh,

You guys do pranks or been a victim of one? Well, you know, I was the son of a high school principal my entire life. So it was every year senior prank was a pretty big deal. Yeah. Things would happen to our house almost every year. The house would get egged pretty regularly. We'd get rolled. We only had two trees in our front yard, but they would get rolled and the house would get rolled. I remember one year was actually a problem was they paintballed our minivan.

Like just lit it up with paintballs. And so where it was like dents and stuff. So that was a problem. Would you doubt this? I think he was probably mad about that one. The other stuff didn't bother him that much. Well, my mom, what my mom started doing is she realized that these kids, they trashed the house, but they wanted to see it in the daylight. So they trash it at like two, three in the morning. And then once sunrise, they come back.

to maybe get pictures, but to see what they'd done. So my mom would clean it up between those hours. My mom would sit there in the living room and watch them through the window do this to the house. And then when they leave, she'd go out and clean it up. And then she'd stay awake, get a cup of coffee, and watch them pull around to look at the house, and it was all perfectly clean. She did that for...

I mean, 20 years. So your mom would know when they were coming to do it? Yeah. It would be like, there would be something happening that she would know. Or she'd hear it out there. It was just, you kind of hear it and you're like, oh, it's the time of year where this is going to happen. Yeah. Yeah, you just go out there. I like that she did, took that approach rather than just being out there when they show up to have them not do it. And just scare them off. Yeah.

That's a lot of work on her part. Yeah, yeah, it was a lot. I didn't help at all. She stays up all night. It's probably satisfying, though, to sit on the front porch with your cup of coffee and watch them come to see their work. Oh, that's why she did it. You know that you foiled it, yeah. That's why she did it. She was like, that just felt so good for them to be so disappointed. It's all gone. Yeah. But did you guys do senior pranks when you were in high school? I feel like we rolled somebody.

Yeah. That's like, no, I never was into drugs. That's one that you do and then you're like, what are we doing? You're just making someone clean up. Because I feel like my house got rolled. Because that was a big thing to get rolled. I don't know if that still is. But like you would roll, you could get your house rolled or someone else rolled. When I was in middle school, it was big. Not since COVID. Now you got to save that time. Oh, that's true. Yeah, I didn't even think about that. Yeah.

It was a big thing. Yeah. You ask from stage, don't you? Senior pranks. I do. I had a bit where I talked about it. Yeah. And ask what people do. Yeah. My school, and I think this is an approach that more schools are doing, is it's sort of a school-sanctioned senior prank. It's where they allow it to happen. They understand there's going to be some kind of senior prank.

So what we'll do is we'll kind of, we'll allow it, but we'll just make sure it doesn't go too crazy. That's how ours was. Like a teacher was there with us when we were doing stuff to the school. They let us in, but a teacher's there to make sure we didn't light the building on fire. You know, but I think we took all the desks and chairs out and built this huge pyramid on the front lawn, did a bunch of other stuff. A common one is taking red solo cups and filling them up with water and then just

like paving the floor with it where there's just thousands of solo cups full of water. In the yard? No, like inside in the school. Like in the hallway. In the hallway of a school. So like you just can't even take a step without. No, you mean you have to individually empty all the cups. You can't just flood the school floor with water. Yeah, so the pranks are just making someone do. Yeah, making the janitor's job real hard. Yeah, well, my school, it was the kids would come in and the other kids would have to help.

fix all this the younger kids yeah yeah the underclass so the kids that called in sick that day yeah they're the ones that did it no this would be a school night we'd do this man okay so right right so the next day when somebody's like i'm sick today they're like oh you did this but they know it was us it was like it was like approved by the school oh okay and so the yeah and then you just know all right juniors have to go do it or something or every year yeah

Because then it gets cleaned up probably pretty easily. I think ours, it was like, it took like three and a half, four hours for them to where they could resume school. Does someone have to run it by the administration to make sure it's safe? I don't know. There's probably more of that going on than they let us know about. But we had like a cool teacher that was like,

I'll just make sure it's not crossing the line. Yeah, we didn't have those kind of cool vibes at my school. You know what I mean? There were no school-sanctioned pranks. Yeah. That I'm aware of. Do you remember? Did y'all do anything? I don't know. A statue didn't get stolen? I don't know. I'm like you. If Nate had been like, go hide, I would be like, well, I'm on tour with Nate, so I have to do what Nate says.

But I don't really want to hide from Nick, you know? I was the guy, when we would go roll people's house in middle school, I was always the guy that was like, come on, guys, let's, I was the lame guy. Yeah. Like, guys, come on, let's get out. We don't know. We'd do it to strangers' houses. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it always made me so uncomfortable. Yeah, I didn't like that either. I never liked, yeah. I mean, the pranking thing is like, most of mine is just, I let it happen. Yeah. If it's going to happen, then I'm going to just let it happen. And like, that's.

I don't like doing – I don't like necessarily doing something. I forget why I would have did – like that one when Nick was like – It was just right place, right time. Yeah, and it just happened where he was riding his bike. We were in a parking lot. He kept making – I don't think he said that. He just kept –

riding it like way off and coming back. He might've been making circles, but then you bet it. Could you go all the way down there? Yeah. Which is a crazy bet. Yeah. Yeah. Obviously I could ride my bike to the end of this paved parking lot. And he comes back and yeah. But yeah, I don't, I don't necessarily like lying to someone's face. Like I don't, you know,

You don't premeditate, though. A friend is different, though. I've always – a friend is different. Strangers, it makes me so uncomfortable. Dude, I watched – I was watching a video on Instagram, and it showed a kid that's like, I duct taped my parents' house. And he duct taped his – and like his dad flips out all the time. And you're like – you see these kids, and you're like, you're just doing it to be –

Like, what is this for? I don't know. It's for a clip. I don't know. And it's just constantly like he does stuff. He put peanut butter on all his parents' kitchen.

Does he live with his parents? Yeah. And so there's a point that it's like, you know, but it's like some of them, he had some views that were like 4 million views and then some were like 150,000. You're like, is it worth it? I mean, my dad would not play that. No. If my dad came in and there was peanut butter everywhere, I wouldn't be living with him anymore. I'll tell you that. Yeah.

Yeah. There was a case here in Nashville just a couple years ago. They were making a YouTube video in Hermitage, Earl Hickory, at that Urban Air trampoline. You guys know that place? And they pulled butcher knives on some people in a parking lot, and one of the people didn't know it was a prank. Yeah. And he had a gun, and he shot and killed the guy. Wow. Really? Yeah. Wow. Wow.

They were just making a YouTube video. Yeah. I don't know why I'm laughing, but if you're going to pull a knife on somebody as a prank, you got to be- It's so dumb. Just a prank, bro. Yeah. It's so dumb. I mean, the guy obviously wasn't charged because- Yeah. I mean- One of my guilty pleasures is this guy on TikTok I follow, and I'm not proud of- I don't like what he does. I'm against what he does, but the videos are so funny. It's just him. He's got a GoPro on, and he just walks up to people at Walmart and just-

picks fights with people. Oh, I've seen some of that. Out of nowhere. And the guy's looking at steaks. And he just walks up and he goes, yeah, you're not the only one getting steaks tonight, buddy. And the guy's like, what? And he goes, move along, pipsqueak. He keeps calling people pipsqueaks. And it's so funny, but I don't like it. But it's so much fun. And do they fight him? He just eggs them on. Don't get into it with him. Yeah, but most people are just so...

by somebody walk. Imagine somebody saying that to you. Yeah, yeah. You're not the only one getting steaks today. There is that guy that would do, he did a bunch of different things, but he would go, would you look at that? Would you look at that? And he would always, he would get real close to people and he did a bunch of different things where he would go, he would go try to buy cars and he would kick the tires and stuff and he'd go, yeah, that's pretty good. I forget what he...

I forget the guy's name. It's great, though. Yeah, that stuff, though, is... So your talent is you are just... You don't care that... I know. So you're doing something awkward. You have no talent. The talent or whatever, what they have that I don't, is that ability. I could never do that to a stranger in public. Yeah, yeah. So your talent is like you're a rude person. Totally. Yeah. Totally. So you don't care. And I don't approve of it, but it's just... God, it's fun to watch sometimes. I don't like...

yeah, so I, there's some of it I could see laughing at, but some of it I don't, I don't like if someone's, you're making someone that doesn't want to be a part of something be, like, feel bad, which I, like, you could argue I do it with Nick, but I mean, we're, me and Nick are buddies and like, we, I would never, uh,

I just do pranks on him because he falls for it. But there's – I love Nick. Yes. I like – Yes, of course. Impractical Jokers is about as far as I can go. Yeah. Because it's mostly them. Obviously, it's them that has to do the dumb stuff. Yeah. I still sometimes feel bad for the people around them. Yeah, yeah. But it's really them. It is. Impractical Jokers is weirdly the best show on TV.

I never am like, I want to go watch Impractical Jokers, but if it's on, I can watch it for 18 hours. Well, it's on TruTV around the clock. When I opened for Dusty at Levity Live, where is that?

In New York? West Nyack. Yeah. Remember the green room had a little TV in the corner that was just stuck on Impractical Jokers all weekend. That's part of the weekend. And we would just sit back there. When you're first, you're like, ah, God, I don't want to watch this. And then like 20 minutes go by, we haven't said anything. We're just like, this show's pretty great. It's great. I've hung out with them a couple of times with you. They're like rock stars. Everyone knows them. Mm-hmm.

Do you know, like, I don't know how they're still pulling off pranks without everyone being like, let's obviously Sal or... Well, I mean, stuff moves on. And then, I mean, I think you could... I think it's become a lot harder for them. I bet it has. And they have to do maybe some makeup or when they did the movie, they had to do... You have to try a few more times where someone's not going to... You know, but you're still... Even if you're the biggest show on the planet, like...

still like a million people are watching, two million, five million people are watching. Like it's not...

You'll still find people. Yeah, you're still going to find people. But I think it became very hard for them. Because they're always in a mall or something. There's a lot of people. Like Sasha Barra-Cohen, he had to basically stop that because he couldn't get away with it anymore. Yeah. Sometimes his were – it was very funny, but some of it I thought was very mean-spirited. And that's how it's coming off to be like –

It's very funny, but you're trying to make someone look dumb. And some of that, I'm like, I don't really find that to be fair. It just doesn't feel to be fair because you're like, you're really...

You're making money off that. The first Borat I thought was so great. And then later I went back and watched it and I was just like, the only reason this is working is because all of these people are nice to you. Yeah. They think that they're dealing with a situation where you don't know better. Right. And you're making them look dumb because they're being nice to you. Yeah. Because they're talking to you and being nice.

So one of the first original pranksters was a Roman emperor named Elagubulus. I guess that's how you say it. He was a teenager when he became emperor, and he loved playing pranks. And he, for his pompous dinner guests, would put a whoopee cushion in their seat that made a farting noise. He's the first known person to use a whoopee cushion. Wow. Farts are timeless, huh? Timeless. Timeless.

But he did some crazy, crazy stuff. Like if his guest got drunk and passed out in the room, he put a bear in the room with them. They just wake up with a bear in there. Just a harmless prank. Just a harmless prank. Really escalated from a whoopee question. Oh, it gets much, much worse. He did some terrible stuff. He would...

He would do like a lottery system or a raffle where he would give away prizes, but you never knew what you'd get. He'd give away like gold and stuff, but he'd also give away a beehive or a dead dog or something like that. Or he would have them catapult gold all over the ground. Everyone would be scrambling to get it. And then he'd catapult snakes on them. Wow.

So you'd be fighting snakes. This doesn't feel like pranks. This is torture. He was a terrible person. This is an emperor? Yeah, teenage emperor. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a teenager. He was a

A lot of pranks are, you got to think about them when you're going, this sounds better. It sounds, you want to hear someone say they did it. Like being like, you wake up with a bear in the room. You're like, that's hilarious. You're like, I just need to hear it. It doesn't mean everybody needs to go do that. But that's very funny when you hear it.

A lot of pranks, like, they sound good, like the plant. Can you imagine if a guy woke up with a bear in the room? That's all, like, that's all it takes. You don't need to go do it. Yeah. But, like, Jackass, like, when they, like, I love, their stuff is very fun. They're doing that to each other, and they're assigned, like, it's, you know, they have, I think Bam, they put him in with a cobra. Yeah.

that's one of the all time great sketches yeah yeah but at least like he's in on it he may not be in on that sketch but you know what you're in for he signed up to do the movie yeah yeah yeah

But he sent him to the movie, but that's like his... I feel like that was like the line. He actually was very afraid of snakes. Yeah, he's like... He thinks he's filming another sketch and then he falls through the ground in a pit of snakes. Wow. Well, that one or the one they put him... They locked him up with a king cobra. I think they must have messed with him a bunch of times. Yeah. Yeah, they did a lot of crazy... They were... It was... Their stuff... Their stuff was always very funny, but it was... You know...

It's obviously some of it's very. Now, Richard Branson, billionaire Richard Branson, he played a prank. I guess he's been rich for a long time because this was in 1989. I couldn't find video of this, but he somehow he and his buddy took a hot air balloon and decorated it to look like a UFO and flew it over London and on April Fool's and people freaked out and like, oh my gosh, there's a UFO and police and everything. Everybody came.

And then they land it and police like surround it. And somehow they opened the door, a hot air balloon. I'm not sure how they did that, but they had like dry ice to make it just like you see in a movie with the smoke, everything. And his buddy dressed up as ET and walked out. And he said the cop that was approaching him freaked out and ran the other way. He's like, you didn't get shot, but they ran the other way. but,

But he said that's his favorite April Fool's prank. I'd say so. Yeah, that's a pretty impressive one. Yeah. Or maybe that's how Richard Branson actually came to Earth. That was how. That's another theory. He is an alien. Maybe. He's like, oh, it was just a prank. I've been here the whole time. But no one knew him before then? Yeah, I don't know. That's how he got there? Maybe so. Maybe so. There was the Great Moon hoax.

The New York Sun, don't start Dusty. The New York Sun ran an article about a scientist, a astronomer who had found pyramids and vegetation and humanoid creatures living on the moon. This was 1835, so people again believed it and they went with it. Problem is all these things, it takes a while for people to figure out it's not real.

This is just a few years ago in Alabama. Still not sure. That last one's not real. In Alabama, on April Fool's, there was an article that said, state of Alabama, the lawmakers changed pi from 3.14 whatever whatever to just three. Because there's like three is a good solid number. It's in the Bible. It's a lot easier. Not all those other numbers. And then they issued a press release saying NASA scientists and Huntsville were all upset about changing pi. It was not true. Some New Mexico...

paper, I think, wrote it. But it makes Alabama look dumb, you know, like they're doing this. But a lot of people bought into it and believed it. I think it's kind of overestimate. They assume we all know what pie is. You think they gave Alabama more credit than they deserve? I think for this joke to work, you'd have to first explain the concept of pie to a lot of people. Yeah. And then be like, it's actually three.

Yeah. I couldn't tell you why Pi is 3.14. I just know what it is or what that means. Oh, he saw the space thing. We saw an Elon Musk rocket go up in Melbourne, Florida. Really? Yeah. When it came back down and landed? No, no. When it was taking off. Oh, I thought... They were doing a launch. Okay. Where'd it go? I thought the rockets come back down. Yeah, I'm sure it will. I saw the beginning. I don't know what conversation we're having. I watched the launch.

Where did it go? So you're like, well, why didn't I see the end of it? My understanding was that SpaceX, one of their big innovations was that the rockets were reusable. And they'd launch something, and then the rocket comes back down and lands where it took off. I'm sure it does in a couple days. No, no. This is like at the moment. So it didn't happen. That's all I wanted to know. Oh, in the moment? You left it there soon. Yeah, it comes right back down and does it. I don't think that's right.

Is it? I think eventually it comes back. Yeah, I think it... I thought it was up there for a while, taking payload or whatever, and then it eventually comes back to Earth. Maybe. Like, where does it go, though? It hits the dome. I got a joke about it now. Because when you... I opened with a joke about it. I almost see if it works everywhere. But, like, yeah. That rocket takes a hard right.

Yeah. Yeah. It does. Yeah. I mean, it's like, I got a very, I got a joke about it. So I don't want to do it because it was very fun. It's very fun to talk about. Yeah. Just being silly. Maybe it is not instantly. Yeah. I imagine you sit next to Elon and the whole time you're like, but it doesn't come back. He's like, I mean, you're not impressed with what's going on right now. And you're like, well, I just was under the impression that,

I've read The New York Sun, and they said that it comes back immediately. So I guess... It's like when someone tells someone, when they're like, well, I read this other thing. When someone's realizing that they're wrong, and then they have to... You have to kind of wrap your head around, and you're like, well, you were just wrong. And then you just... I'm not saying this is just a good point. No, no, I understand, I understand. And then you see the person, they go, well, I read it. I read it. That was what I was told. Like, they're, you know...

You're not just going like, yeah, but you could be wrong. I'm admitting. I'm pretty good at admitting. No, I know. It's pretty wrong. It just made me think of when you have to just go, yeah, I was way wrong. Well, yeah, I just would be curious about what the point of the rocket is. What? I mean, especially if it just comes right back. Is that a prank? It takes something up.

Yeah. Whatever it's taken up detaches itself from the rocket. Now, traditionally how rockets have worked up until now is that rocket then dies. Yeah. Crashes into the ocean. Crashes into the ocean or whatever. And it's tremendously expensive. Yeah. So this idea is that rocket will then comes back down and lands right where it was. Yeah. So that's what's happening. So you could be throwing stuff up there all day. Yeah. It's like a volleyball. Just goes up there. Just like, zoop, and then comes back down.

Just launch stuff. Yeah. Yeah. All right. But the piece that doesn't come back, where is it going? To outer space. To space. You did. We did see the fire thing went away. You see the fire thing, and then it does go away, and I don't see the fire. So his rockets are just up in space right now. Does he have any video of it going from Earth into space? Yeah. Let's see. That'd be amazing. Yeah.

There it is landing. So it took whatever up, then it comes back. I think it takes like satellites. That seems like just they did the video in reverse. That's true. You don't know that they didn't do that. But the smoke is still billowing? Yeah. Even in reverse? So that with, I did not see that. Maybe I didn't pay attention to that. So maybe it did come back. So maybe you're exactly right, Aaron. Because where would that part go? I think it comes back, but just not immediately. Okay.

Well, what's it doing? It just hangs out where? Well, it takes a while to get up there. I don't think it's just 30 feet in the air. No, I know, but then it's – I wonder how quick it comes back.

Yeah, I can't find the answer to that. That's what I've been looking for. Nate's like, why is everyone still hanging out here? It's almost like, hey, you could, if you'd waited 10 more minutes, you'd have seen it come back. You're like, why are y'all still hanging here? Let's go. Let's go, everybody. It seems like seeing a rocket land would be more exciting than seeing it take off. Yeah. Well, it is these days. Yeah. We've seen a rocket take off. Yeah. But you don't see it land too often.

Have you ever seen a rocket take off? No. Okay. You said it like, you're like, I don't even know why I even bother to go outside. Like you go, hey, this rocket's about to take off. You're like, I'm good. Who cares? I think you could find kids now that would be like, hey, this rocket's about to take off. And they'd be like, I'm good. So I finally found the answer. The whole thing takes about nine minutes from takeoff to landing. Nine minutes. All right. I guess I'm all right.

It's pretty impressive. I guess I have to admit that I'm wrong. I feel like, yeah, well, I was right. So we're looking at about four and a half minutes to get to space then. No, no, just to get to whatever on top of the thing is.

Yeah, but if that thing's, it just shoots off, but it's got to have some force behind it to get it on into space. Well, it probably comes down a lot more slowly than it goes up because on the way up, it's literally a rocket being launched. So less than, so two minutes to space. Yeah, probably. Yeah, probably less than that.

I'm confused. The rocket goes up for a couple of minutes and then the payload or whatever it's taking keeps going? It detaches from the rocket. And how does it keep going to outer space? Well, it's got a pretty good amount of acceleration and momentum because it's been attached to a rocket. That'll be enough to keep it going. It'll just keep going. Hard work. Practice, practice, practice. Puts in the work, huh? Yeah. All right.

That's the biggest prank of all, huh, Dusty? Well, we've still not seen the video of the end going from Earth into space, but...

Well, they were talking about – I'm sure it's out there, though. Is there a video of it? I'm sure there is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, there's a video of this. Just look up a video and just show it. When the Cowboy Stadium opened – gosh, how many years has that been now? Ten, maybe? Yeah. I don't know. In Jerry's world, they would – the punter sometimes, if they kicked the ball too high, it would hit the dome, you know? And they had to – they were talking about – The score –

Oh, yeah. It hit the scoreboard. Yeah, you're right. The scoreboard. And they were talking about how you had to adjust for that. And that didn't happen anymore. And I was thinking about Dusty, how these rockets, you know, you can only go so high or might hit something and bounce back. But they've learned to adapt to it. Yeah. So. Yeah. I'm not saying it hits anything. I'm just wondering. I just would love to see it. Okay. All right. What's the next one? Well, we talked about when Nick was here, because we did hoaxes once before. Sid Finch. Yeah. Yeah.

Sid Finch was made up stories. The baseball. Sports Illustrated did an April Fool's issue about a guy who could throw 168 miles per hour. Wow. And he was an orphan and just all these crazy things he could do. And people bought into it. Henry Rowan Gardner. Yeah, kind of like Henry Rowan Gardner. People bought into it and a lot of people believed it. And they really played it up. Lenny Dockster, who played for the Mets at the time, was being on it. And-

I think Nick halfway believed it when he was on this episode. Oh, yeah. That was one that, yeah. Yeah. So we just redid that one to catch Dusty back up. You get all these people listening and you're like, everybody, we want to tell Dusty this stuff. Well, it's interesting. If you're going to play a prank like that, that's like way too high of a number.

Yes, I agree. 168. I agree. I was thinking that when I read that. If you told me a kid threw 120. Yeah, I was going to say like 112. That's still unbelievable. Yeah. But like that high, you'd be like, whoa, but 168 is crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. But they're – who was – I watched some of the World Baseball – what was it? It was awesome. World Baseball Classic. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and they had –

At the end of it, that Ohtani and Trout. I mean, that was the whole thing was that matchup, and it came down to two outs, bottom of the ninth, Ohani versus Trout. Wild. Insane that that worked out. That Ohtani guy is – He's probably the best baseball player ever. Yeah, I mean, he's Babe Ruth, but now –

And to be Babe Ruth now is insane. Babe Ruth back then, I feel like people pitched and batted more and stuff like that. But he only did both for two years. Only two seasons he pitched and hit. Oh, really? And then after two seasons, he just became an outfielder.

and just hit. So Otani's already done more than Babe Ruth ever. You're saying Babe Ruth only did it two seasons. Yeah, did I say Otani? No, you said it right. Okay. Yeah, Babe Ruth only did both for two years. So the comparison's not even fair to Otani anymore. Yeah, yeah. And also back then, what were they throwing?

I mean, max, maybe low 80s. Yeah. Which was crazy at the time. But it's like, you know, Otani threw 100 miles an hour. Otani threw the fastest pitch of the entire tournament and hit the hardest ball in the entire tournament. Insane. Insane. Yeah. Nobody's done what he's done. Yeah. It's crazy. Crazy.

All right. There you go. Here's the rocket coming back down. You've been watching this whole thing. Yeah. I mean, still, yeah, it's not a good video. You're saying you're watching USC. What do you want? Like a first-person GoPro video? I'd like a video attached to the rocket. And it's almost like giving you a lateral, like a, I don't know the view, but like you're looking out at, you can see people watching the rocket take off. And then it takes off.

And then we go way high. And the next thing you know, we're entering space. I want to see them go through the atmosphere. I want to see it all. I want to see what it looks like. I feel like I've seen what you're talking about. I feel like I have too. I've never seen it. Point of view, POV. Here's a good one. NPR did this back in 2014 on April Fool's. They posted an article entitled, Why Doesn't America Read Anymore?

And people flipped out with all their comments and sharing their opinions and stuff like that. But if you open the article, it tells you it's an April Fool's joke. So they proved their point about America not reading because no one read the article. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. So that's a pretty good one. Yeah. Wow.

When was that? 2014. That's like the old test they used to give us in school. They would say, you know, read all the instructions before you take the test. And then if you read all the instructions, the instructions say, do not take this test. And you knew who didn't read it because it'd be filling in the blanks. And that was me. I don't know these instructions. I don't know how to take a test. I would just not take tests and just hope it works out. And one day it worked out.

Well, you want to be like, well, why does the last step override all the other steps? Yeah. Yeah.

You know? Yeah. That's the argument I remember making. Here's literally a video from GoPro of a GoPro attached to a rocket being launched into space. Let's see. All right. Let's see. All right. Well, all right. There's people. There's people waving down there. Oh. Okay. So we've already cut away. So we've already edited. Okay. Yeah. It's spinning real fast. Yeah. It's going to spin. It's got to go quick. It's got to get this motion sickness here. Yeah.

Well, we'd have to show, you'd have to watch it on your own to be like, yeah, like go, go like a, can we fast forward a little bit? Yeah. Well, I want to get to the exact moment when it comes in. Now, now it's like, it's look how high that is. Okay. It's very quick. Oh, now, oh, now we've hit something. I bet you would imagine you hit space. Yeah. Something. You've hit space and it's calmed down. Oh, so then we add it.

And now, okay, now we're in some kind of weird CGI moment here. Yep, now you're in space. Oh, that's when they let that rocket go. Yeah, see? Now if it were SpaceX, that would just come back and land. All right, so GoPro, they're working the fisheye lens. I know that feature on there. Yep, there it is. Now you're in space. There you go. Okay, well. That's the rocket that's there.

Yeah. It's obvious to me what happened. GoPro, in an elaborate attempt to sell GoPros to rocket companies, did this whole video. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, that didn't do it for me. I mean, I'll be honest with you. I mean, I was ready for my mind to be blown. I was hoping it'd be just one continuous shot, too. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I imagine they have it. Yeah. I mean, they're trying to make it watchable. This is trying to be watchable for people that are not dusty. But the dusties are like, I need to...

I need to see the guy with the GoPro. Yeah. I mean, I want to see him hook up. I want a straight view hook up to the space station. Because people can go to space now. If someone said you can go to space, would you do it?

Yeah, I would do it. Yeah, just to be like, let me see where we're going. Of course, yeah. I mean, and if I'm wrong, that'd be great because I'm like, I'm in space, guys. Yeah. That'd be awesome. But what if you're right? What happens? Well, they probably kill me right now. That's what I'm saying. So that's the tough part. Yeah, yeah. So do you, yeah. Yo, you don't want to go on that trip, Mike, because once you find out –

You ain't coming back. Yeah. In 1996, Taco Bell ran advertisements in newspapers nationwide that they, to help the national debt, they had bought the Liberty Bell and they were renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. And people lost their minds over it. Oh, that's great. Yeah. People thought it was real. That's a great way to, it's a great marketing tactic. I think we've talked about it before. Remember when Omaha Steaks was,

The big story was that Peyton Manning was going to, when he said Omaha pre-snap, he was going to get sponsored by Omaha Steaks. I don't remember that. Saying that. Completely fake story. Yeah. It got a ton of press for Omaha Steaks. It was never real. And then the other one I remember was Spider-Man 2.

A big story was Spider-Man 2 was going to put their logos on the bases in Major League Baseball games. Totally made up. People got furious about it. It's the exact same thing as this. Taco Bell buys the Liberty Bell. Yeah, I feel like you're maybe not far from some of that stuff. I think some of that stuff could happen. Similar, Burger King ran an advertisement for Left-Handed Whopper.

They said all the condiments would rotate 180 degrees to suit the left-handed burger connoisseur. People believed it. And the next day, everyone was lined up at Burger King asking for the left-handed Whopper. Right-handed people are saying, make sure your mind's right-handed because I'm a right-handed person. Yeah, see, I'm left-handed. That seems like a cruel joke to the left-handed people. We're already –

you know, dealing with issues out here. Do you buy any or have you ever bought any products designed specifically for left-handed people? Only baseball gloves. Yeah. Oh, interesting. I never can play catch with people just that have gloves because there's rarely a left-handed person out there. And if they are, they need the glove. Right. You know, but somebody will have some extra gloves like you want to play catch and have to catch and then take it off to throw. I was wondering if they make like spiral, like binders or spiral notebooks. Yeah.

Backwards for left-handed people? They may, but you still have to drag your hand all across everything you're writing in or do like this. You're still working against what God did to you, yeah. And all of the desk in school have the right hand. Oh, that must be tough. And then we didn't have that. Yeah. It's hard out here. Yeah. It's hard out here for left-handed people. It's tough. I'm sorry, man. I'm a lefty too, but...

Isn't there some languages that... Yeah, we talked about that. Makes sense, dude. Because in baseball, everybody would have to shift. Yeah. And then I would strike out. And they're like, why do we even move? Just go back. The first time up, people would shift. Second time up, they're like, just stay where you're at. It doesn't matter. Just move in. Yeah. Shift in.

The BBC pulled a prank in 1976 where an astronomer told people that Jupiter and Pluto were going to be in alignment. So for one minute, there'd be a slight reduction in Earth's gravity, allowing people to briefly float. And sure enough, at 948, people...

People were saying they felt themselves get lighter, even though it wasn't true. But a lot of people were saying it really happened to them. That's the mind. The mind can – you can make yourself feel that. You should almost thank them for doing that. Yeah. Thank you, BBC. Yeah, for doing something that's like just unites people for a second. Made us forget about all the real – what atrocities were being committed while that was happening. Yeah. Yeah, it's nice. Yeah. Yeah.

Boston TV station told people that there was a hill outside Boston that had erupted as a volcano. This was a few days after Mount St. Helens. Wow. And they ran footage of Jimmy Carter talking about it, even though they'd just taken footage from the Mount St. Helens thing and put it together and used footage that was also from Mount St. Helens telling people it was a hill outside of Boston. And of course, people freaked out and lost their mind and

And, you know, the governor had to issue a statement telling people, calm down, take it easy. I think the producer of the TV station got fired. But, you know, they always put April Fool's up somewhere, but it's not blatant enough. Yeah. Yeah. They put it up at the end, but by then people already panicked and ran out in the streets. Yeah. Yeah. Makes it – yeah. Yeah.

People, I don't, I mean, we said none of us really like it, but they're always like, oh, you fell for it. Well, we trusted you. You seem like you're an honest person. Yeah, you lied to us. I'll never make that mistake again. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's like the being nice is a lot of times a prank. Someone being nice. Yes. And going, yeah, okay. Nick is the nicest. Yeah. Yeah. So it's someone being very trusting. I mean, I had a good friend who sent me a flyer and said, do you think this is a good flyer? I've been working really hard on this. I'd like your opinion.

And I didn't, I'm not that gullible. Poor Dusty spent all day trying to help him. Well, I got the, yeah, I got the same one too. And I was like, I was like, yeah, I tried to point out a couple of things that I thought was wrong with it. But, uh, yeah. Aaron made a flyer for a show.

Right? Yeah. And Aaron's like a graphics guy. He's made flyers for me in the past. So who am I to question Aaron's ability to make a flyer? Well, I thought it legit made you upset, Dusty, when I sent that to you. No, no, it didn't make me upset. Okay. But I was like, who am I to question? Aaron said I've worked really hard on this. And then he sent it to me and I'm like, well, I don't really like that microphone in there. And he's like, well, I want people to know it's stand up. And I was like, oh, okay. Can't argue with that. Yeah.

I don't know if you saw it, but... We talked about it. Hindsighted, it's not a good-looking flyer. But I, you know, I don't know his genius. Yeah. You know what I mean? Who am I? In 2021, The Atlantic ran an article about Nate Bargatze calling him the nicest man in stand-up. A lot of people fell for it. Until a few weeks later when he called me a cow. And then people knew something's not right here. Yeah.

But Opie and Anthony, when they worked for a station in Boston, they broke in and said that the mayor of Boston had died in a car crash in Florida. And they had soundbites from people talking about it. It was just a made-up thing. They got fired for it from the radio station. Oh, that's what ended it.

For them. I guess. Yeah. Really? Because they were in New York for years, right? Yeah, yeah. But before they came there, this was in 1998. Did you ever do opening anything, or was that before you were? No. No, I never did opening anything. No, I was there during it. And we wanted to get on it, but we were never. I was like, I knew, I think DeRosa got on a bunch of

uh guys got on but i was at i was at the level of like you know that was like a patrice burr like yeah those guys were all in there doing it and so i was like kind of the class under where i thought like maybe i'm gonna get on hopefully i'd get on and then i just never got on i've done jim and sam now but a bunch obviously but like they're but yeah i was never and then it went away so

Your dad told me that one of his favorite all-time jokes or stories is Josh Wolfe. And I guess a prank he played on his buddy at a bachelor party. Do you know this story? No. His buddy asked him to get him a stripper for his bachelor party, and he hired some woman wrestler.

And I guess she came out and she did strip, but she also starts picking up the guy and just body slamming him and just wearing the guy out. And his buddy gets mad and tries to fight back and she just destroys him. It's a long... I watch it on YouTube. You hired a hitman. Basically. But it's a prank you play. It's got millions and millions of views, but your dad says it's one of the funniest stories he'd ever heard. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I haven't seen it. I don't know if you did it justice. I did not do it. I did not do it justice. Yeah. Well, it's a little dirtier than what you're showing. I was trying to edit. You're cleaning it up. Edit on the fly. Yeah. Well, you did it when you said stripper. I tell you, yo, movies I watch, this is not this, but I watch, you know, I always have some movies I've watched.

Last night, had a little class that up American graffiti. Oh, great. Love that movie, which is, uh, Ron Howard. And, uh, I've never seen it. It's a classic. I know. Yeah. It was just on, it was on same guy that did star Wars, right? It's, uh, George Lucas. Yeah, it was on. And then there was part of me that I was sitting there and, uh, I did nothing yesterday. I had a nice laying around day. Uh,

Harrison Ford's in it. And then, so I'm just, I was like, all right, let me, it was on and then Laura's in there too. And then she fell asleep two seconds. It's always her use, no matter what time it could be. She's going to fall asleep. And then, so I'm just kind of watching. And I was like,

Kind of intrigued with it. Then I thought, some of me, I was kind of thinking, you know, we're shooting specials now. We're like, you know, I'm kind of like, I need to maybe watch some stuff and see how stuff is shot, see what it looks like and see, you know. I don't know any of that stuff. I never grew up, I never watched any of this. So I just kind of watched it and then finished it. And then when I was done, then I went and watched The Italian Job.

I remember that movie. Yeah, that's a good movie. Yeah, and that was very fun. I think that's Harrison Ford's first main role. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, it was... So, yeah. That's great. Yeah, I did a gig outside of Modesto, and that's where it takes place, right? Modesto, California? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That was like they graduated high school and it was their last night in Modesto before they went out to college. Yes. Yeah. But it's rated PG and I don't know if it would be rated PG. No.

It'd be rated PG-13 now, probably. But it's crazy with the times how it was so much looser with the PG rating back then and stricter now. You almost would think some stuff is getting like you're seeing, you know, the kids are seeing more stuff than they've ever seen quicker now. But it's supposedly a stricter. I bet the rating matters less to how much the movie is going to make. Well, there was no PG-13 back then. Oh, it just went to PG to R? Mm-hmm.

Yeah, just parental guidance. It's like, all right, watch, you know, watch your, don't let your kids watch this unless you want them to see it. Yeah. You know? Yeah. It also makes sense. It's closer, it must be closer to PG than an R, right? I would say so. Yeah. Oh, you're saying PG, PG-13 is a less harsh rating? Yeah.

Well, they are. I mean, someone moons someone in that movie. And someone moons someone. PG-13 didn't exist when this movie came out. But I'm saying like if it's PG, it's saying parental guidance. If it's PG-13, it's saying parental guidance unless they're 13. Unless they're 13 and up. Yeah. Yeah. Unless they're exactly 13. Yeah. Well, even if they're 13, you would be like, it's not bad for the parent to be. Yeah. Yeah. Like, let me check it out.

I could never see any movies growing up. I couldn't either, but it's like, yeah, I would think, yeah. Yeah, I wish somebody would have. I mean, it's interesting to see all the cars, to see all the, you know, I've read about it too. It was George Lucas.

directed this. Yep. And they, and Francis Ford Coppola? Ford Coppola came up and said, hey, I want you to make like a coming of age movie. And he's like, all right. And then he made this. Wolfman Jack? Yeah, people say this is George Lucas' real masterpiece. Yeah, Dusty mentioned him a couple episodes ago when you were talking about the guy with the gravelly voice. You were trying to say Tom Wait, but you said Wolfman Jack. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't know Wolf, and then when I watched last night, I looked up Wolfman Jack

Yeah, again, back in my day, he was a big deal. People used to say I sounded like Wolfman Jack. Yeah. Do you remember listening to him on the radio? I just remember not so much the radio. He was around. But he would be on these late night talk shows and stuff. He was kind of like Ryan Seacrest or something now. New Year's Eve, he would be one of the hosts or something like that. I mean, half of those people on that list, I know Cindy Williams was on Laverne and Shirley and

You love seeing those names. Oh, yeah. I did Mackenzie Phillips. Candy Clark. I don't know Candy, but... Bo Hopkins. I don't know Bo. Richard Dreyfuss. I think you guys know him. Yeah, I know Richard Dreyfuss. There's a lot of people. I mean, my daughter's now watching Sesame Street. I don't know half the puppets because they've come along since...

There was no Elmo when I was a kid. Elmo's been around for 40 years, but there was no Elmo when I was- You know, the Elmo song that I saw on Sesame Street the other day, I pulled it up. It's a good jam. Yeah. The Elmo song with Big Bird and the elephant guy. Yeah. Mr. Snuffleupagus? Yeah. Yeah. That's a jam. Snuffleupagus. How did they make that name? Snuffleupagus.

I don't know. It's all, I mean, it's all, yeah, it's all fake. I hate to ruin it, but well, it's April fool's episode. So yeah, it's a good way to wrap it up. All right. All right. Well, happy April fools. Uh, Oh yeah. If you want to say you're going, I'm going to, uh, try this weekend. Uh,

This week, big shows. Pittsburgh PPG Arena. Penguins, where the Penguins play. Wow, that's sick. And then Raleigh the day before that. Raleigh, North Carolina the day before that, where the Hurricanes play. And then where the Penguins play. And then Charleston, West Virginia as well that weekend. Something else. There's maybe something else.

I think there's some, oh, then Covelli Center in Youngstown, Ohio. And then, yeah. So that's where I'll be at this weekend. Go and go watch Mike Vecchione's special. It did great. A lot of people talked about it and they loved it and how funny Mike is. And, you know, that was the first step into this Nate Land world where we can give you TV clean content, I think.

That's basically it. Yeah, it came out great, man. Came out great. Super funny. It was awesome. So, yeah. Excited for Greg Warren's. And we're off and running. Go subscribe to Nate Land Entertainment on YouTube. Dustin Nickerson has a new special out. Dustin Nickerson has a special out. Very funny. Runs in the family. Yeah. Dustin Nickerson.

Dustin, who we have not been able to have on the show yet, but Dustin comes out with me on the road. And he's written a book. We talked about his book. He's got a podcast. I mean, this is a dude that grinds it out. And hopefully I can do a special with him one day. But he's very, very funny. Talks a lot about family. He has a great family with kids and that kind of stuff. And you will really enjoy Dustin. And yeah, I mean, he truly works very hard.

Yeah. And I opened for him on this special taping. So if you're watching and you're like, man, that crowd's hot. I'm the get. Just know it's that was Aaron. And it was also Taylor Tomlinson who went up after me. She got him going a little more than I did, but I had a pretty good set on those. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

This Saturday, assuming it's not April Fool's joke, I'll be back at the Grand Ole Opry. They could be playing a prank on me. But I'm going to show up and see. I'll be at the Opry this Saturday. And then Sunday night, I'm headlining Stand Up Live in Huntsville. So please come to that. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll be at Comedy – oh, sorry. I thought you already went. You were talking about things. No. The show was so hot. I'm sorry. Yeah, I got in a rhythm here. I'm sorry.

But I need this. I'm in Syracuse, New York this weekend. Oh, yeah. At the Funny Bone. Two shows.

Come on out. It's a great club. I always like going there. I haven't been there in years. Now I'm back headlining, so I'm excited. And then Lexington next week. Hopefully the 20 people that come see me will come out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That'll be great. Awesome. But no, it is great. I like it there. You're going to have fun. And I'll be at Comedy Works Denver this weekend, April 11th.

whatever the month is now to April. I don't know. I'll be there Thursday, Friday, Saturday. I don't know the dates. Come a ring in the new year with Dusty. Yes. Yeah. On Saturday. Happy new year. Champagne. The real new year. Yeah. The real new year. All right. We love you. Thank you. And we'll see you next week. Bye. Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetze, and my wife, Laura, on the Audioboom platform.

Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.