143: #143 the Bible & Recycling
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Shooting stuff happened, and we didn't really know what was going on at first when we recorded, so we didn't get to say anything. But obviously our hearts are, I mean, just broken by what happened. I don't think we had anybody very close in that school, but it's like Nashville is such a small city that you have a friend of a friend, a teacher, or a...

One of the kids, they're in the school, and so it's obviously hit extremely close to home. And yeah, it was just brutal and just praying super hard for those families. I can't imagine going through what they're having to go through. So just continue prayers for everybody at the Covenant School, and yeah, we love you. Hello, folks.

And hey, Bear, welcome to the Nate Land podcast. All right. Hello, folks. Hey, Bear. I'm Nate Bargetti with Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, the old Dusty Slate. All right. Yeah, he's back. He's back. Yeah. Welcome back. You weren't here last week, were you? I don't think I was gone. No, you were last week. I was here last week, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm back, though. I mean, I am back. Yeah.

Well, we're glad to have you back. Well, I'm happy to be here. Yeah, it feels good. There you go. I'm pumped. That's all we can ask. Yeah. We had a, yeah, I'm excited to be back. We did, I got a week, you know, somewhat week off. This week, I do have a week off this week.

So, yeah, it's nice. And then our old Bridgestone show. Those shows you did this past weekend looked unbelievable. Yeah. Those photos. Look at that. It's nuts, dude. That was the Pittsburgh. That was Raleigh, I believe. Wow. And I was in Youngstown and Charleston, West Virginia. It was, yeah, this weekend was, you know, I posted about it, like saying it was the first big boy weekend ever.

But it's the, I mean, it was like, it was all arenas. And two of the arenas, it's the most shows I've ever, most people I've ever performed in front of. And it was like between eight and nine, almost 10,000 people. So crazy. Yeah, they were, it was surreal. Is that surreal? Surreal. Surreal. That's how he said it was so real. Yeah, surreal.

Surreal. Surreal. Surreal. You're not supposed to stop after the surreal. Surreal. It's one word. Oh, surreal. Yeah. That's better. You can just say wild. Like a real that you really respect. Yeah. Yeah. Surreal. Surreal. Yeah, it was beyond... I mean, it's unreal. I don't even know. Could have just got to that. Yeah, no, I could have said that. It's unbelievable. Dude, it shows...

It was something, yeah, I don't, I mean, it was, it's crazy. It's absolutely insane. When we go there and, I mean, it's so many people, dude. And you honestly, when you're up there, I can tell you, you feel, you're like, I don't, can I entertain this many people? I don't know if I'm, you know, you have that moment of like, I don't,

A, you definitely, you know, I've talked about it before in here, you always have an imposter feeling, like who they're here to see. Well, you have it the most in that. I bet. With that many people, you're like, I don't know what's going on. Because you just can't imagine that anybody would, this many people. It is wild. You know, the first time I saw you live was at a bar. What is it called? It was that real smoky bar over there. Spanky's? No, not Spanky's. It was at the roof was caving in. They had the-

Springwater? Springwater, yeah. That's the first time I ever saw you live. I know you were already doing better than that, but it is funny to see you there and then now see you at this. Are you saying this is a different type of show than the Springwater Supper Club and Lounge in downtown Nashville? Yeah, a bit. A little bit. A few less people, but it's...

Yeah, it's – More people in the front row here than it's pretty much. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it went all the way back. And, you know, I would love to do some of these arenas like Nashville we're doing in the round. Like if you can get to the world of these arenas, I'd love to do a lot of them, some of the round. I mean, the people are at the top. It's just insane. It's absolutely insane. Yeah.

And when you walk out and everybody's so nice and they're so great. And, you know, I was saying, I said it this way, I was like, I don't think I could ever pay back everybody that came to these shows. That's how much they mean to us. To me, you know, my dad's with me. Like, I love my dad being with me because he's,

we, we, as a family, we've all, we obviously know how great he is and how funny he is. And so for, for us, for people to get to see that we get, you know, now I get to show them off to this many people and they're all blown away by it. And, uh,

Yeah, I was curious. Your dad, I mean, he's so great at close-up magic, so I was wondering how a giant arena that would translate. But I've gotten so many emails from people just saying he stole the show. Yeah. I saw some great comments about your dad, too. Yeah. Well, they have the cameras. They have the screen. And so, I mean, it actually helps. It's even easier than the theater because you can't really see the theater. But you at least have the option of a screen here. Uh-huh.

And, you know, I think it's a lot about like, you know, these are such big things. I know people, you always watch the screens and stuff, but it's about just being together with people. Like it's, you know, someone, I thought someone said, like people were just nice in the parking lot. Like, oh, I had someone, a friend text me, Scott, and he said,

Had his family in Youngstown. And so Youngstown is right next to East Palestine where they've had that train derailment and all the water and all this crazy stuff. And so they've just gone through a lot. And he just said something about it. He's like, man, it's like I had a bunch of people get that show. And they said everybody was nice in the parking lot afterwards. Everybody's just pleasant. And they've been through a lot. So it's like they just need...

They just want to have fun. That's what's insane. There's this many. It's crazy to me. There's so many people that just are like, yo, dude, I just don't want. I just want to have a good time. Yeah. I just like, can we have something that's a good time? That's how little you see is like entertainment to be. They're not. No one's giving that. It's crazy. Like, like, how do they not thinking about that? Just be fun. Just be fun. Get over yourself and be fun.

That's what you should do. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I've had, I mean, people have said that to me at comedy clubs. They say it's like people that work at clubs will say, it's just so nice to see someone that's just like telling stories and being funny and not like telling us something. Right. Yeah. You know, I feel like so much is people just, I gotta, they're just telling you something. You can't think that you're smarter than all those people. Yeah. It's just impossible. You just can't.

You're talking to a lot of people. I have to be in the low bottom half of intelligence in those.

If they got us all together and rounded us up, I'm not going to be near the top. Which means there's four to 4,500 people there that are smarter than you. Oh, maybe more than that. Even at the halfway mark. Yeah. And nobody comes going, I hope I learned something during this. It would be funny if they did. They rounded them up by intelligence, and then they're like, why are we all here? And they're like, well, you're not going to see them from right here. But way, way, way in the back, there's a guy. And-

He was pretty funny. He was back there going, man, this is surreal. He'd go, man, this is surreal. We're just chanting, surreal, surreal. Can you believe they rounded us up by intelligence? So it's, yeah, it was, you know, I mean, it's, you try to make it as good as, show as good as you can for that many people. And, you know, we have the Nashville one coming up, which is going to be more than that.

And it's, you know, man, when you, yeah, they just are, people are awesome. It's just an awesome group of people. And yeah, I think everybody goes, has a great time and people are nice to each other. And it's just a nice, you know, that's what we're doing.

Got Mike Vickie on special. You can go check that out. Been great comments on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. People have loved that. It's what we're doing. We're doing Greg Warren's special. It'll be coming out in April. Then Joe Zimmerman's special. We got another thing. We're planning on shooting with comedy. You know, introducing a lot of people to comedy. There's a lot of kids that come. I had to go over. Oh, there's a very funny... So there was a kid...

If I see kids, I'll try to, if we can. I mean, it gets hard and it gets crazy. But if I see a kid, I'll try to come up and say hello. You know, talk to the kid. I always want to talk to the kid. Like, sometimes a kid might come up to the front of the stage when I'm done and say goodnight. Hopefully I can see. If I ever don't come up to you, I can't. It's a lot of times, sometimes the spotlight's in your eyes. I mean, I can't even see if someone walks up to the front. I try at the end to make it where I can see because you want to –

just, you know, see some people. And so when the kid comes up, I'll say something to the kid. Cause you're a lot of these kids first shows. And, and then there's this one kid. So right when I got up, he saw me before the show. And then I was like, I waved at him and I saw him after and I waved and I went over just to meet him real fast.

But then he realized like, well, that was then a lot of people came over and I took a picture with a lot of people, but it was like, it was going to be kind of impossible. I'm just like standing in a corner and people are trying to get out too. So it was like, we had to kind of,

After a minute, it was like, all right, we kind of got to go. And so Graham's behind me. And it was very funny. Graham texted me very sweetly. Dustin Chapin, Graham's with me too. Everybody's destroyed. Dustin's got a Dry Bar comedy out. If you watch Dry Bar, he just put a Dry Bar out. So go check that out. It's been doing good. But if you're able to support this world and the comics we have in this world, it's just –

It just helps us bring more people to this world and more people

and stuff for you to watch. But Graham, this one lady came over and just was, you know, so sweet. And she went through cancer and she was saying that how they listened to my stuff when they, you know, when she was going through it and her family, they meant a lot. It was very, very sweet. And we took a picture and I got it. It was very nice to get to meet her. But right when I do it, so Graham does not hear that, but it's becoming like, it's already become kind of a problem, me staying in there. That lady's...

starting to cry a little bit. And then Graham, just over the back of it, he goes, he just, he just, I'm backing away from the microphone. He just goes, he's got to go folks. Cause he was like trying to get, so all weekend, that's all we did was just, he's got to go folks. This lady's like, I have cancer. It's just, I'm going through. So, Hey lady, he's got to go. Wrap it up. Wrap it up. And you're like, he didn't know that was happening. So,

So it was funny too, Graham didn't realize what he was getting into this weekend. Like, you know, cause when I bring openers, we go through it and we kind of decide, you know, you kind of pick where everybody's going to go and what we're going to do and, you know, try to get people. Mike is from Youngstown. He couldn't, he had a show this, this past weekend. So he couldn't be in Youngstown. You try to get people if they're from there, like, you know, you want,

And so Graham was just on this one. And then he didn't, he did, it's so funny. He's like, I don't think he just realized what he was getting, what this weekend was. Yeah. And so then we just show up and he's like, it's where, you know, he's from Canada, so a giant hockey fan. Yeah. And we're just at where the Hurricanes, the Canes play. And then we go to where the Penguins play. And he, you know, and he's in front of, you know, almost 10,000 people. Right. And he's just like, yeah, I wasn't.

I don't know if I was... His head wasn't wrapped around what he was doing. How many people are at these places? Audience members? It was around 8,000, 9,000 at the Raleigh and then close to 10,000. So he probably wasn't even expecting that too, right? 9,000 people? Not in a show, no. I mean, no, because a lot of times we're doing two... You're doing anywhere from...

2,000, 1,800, 2,000, depends on the venue, and two, you can do this. Yeah. So it's like, and it's a mix. Like, coming up is like, we have some big, we have like Bridgestone, then after that, like there's a mix of like I'm going to go some other places that are smaller and we've added shows and whether like 2,000, and I think every, we've all kind of done those. But I've done some, the Youngstown and the Charleston, West Virginia, those two, yeah,

that we did are like kind of hockey arenas. They're like, so, uh, I've done a few more of those though. You do a lot of probably hockey arenas. Cause it's usually around four or 5,000 people. And like, uh, so I think there's a lot of hockey arenas and hockey arenas are, you know, nice. They're a nice size. And, uh,

I mean, it was insane to go to the hockey arenas after this. After you go to the Penguins and you go... You know what they were saying where you're just out there like, oh, this is a little show we got tonight. Just joking. But it was... It's just such a different... It's...

Just such a different kind of thing. I was with you at the Pittsburgh Improv not too many years ago, and we met up with Impractical Jokers afterwards, and they had just done a show there, and we went in there and looked at that arena. Yeah. And we were like, this is unbelievable how big it is, and now you're filling it up. Well, I think I remember that night you said, you'll never make it here. Yeah.

I think I did. I think, yeah. I think that's what, this is a Brian you don't see. He goes, take a look because this is the last time you'll ever be in this place. And I go, what if I bought a ticket? He goes, you ain't going to be able to afford a ticket. Yeah. I was like, golly, Brian. I'm brutal on the road. Yeah, just brutal. Yeah. That's why I call him a cow because I'm just trying to, because he's a bully. Yeah. Because he's a bully. I remember one night, I hope you don't mind me telling this. We were, this is back when you were still drinking. Yeah.

But we were, you're looking at me like, oh boy, where's this going? But after the show was over, you never were a crazy drinker. Yeah. But you said yourself that it allows you to do so much more and do so many more things. And you said, we were driving by where the Indianapolis Pacers, Indiana Pacers play in Indianapolis. You said, you think I'll ever do an arena like that someday? And I was like, I don't know, maybe. And you said something like, I just got to get, I got to get,

it makes it sound like you had a problem, which you didn't, but you said to him, whatever, get that under control. And then you did right after that. That was, I don't know, how many years ago was that? That you've been, hadn't had a drink. 2019. Yeah.

February, maybe. So four years? Yeah. Something like that. And now here you are doing arenas. No, that was it. It was a problem in the fact that it affects your life. Like it was, you know, it's, I never was hiding alcohol. There's like, there's different, that's the thing. Like someone quitting drinking, there's different. I heard Rob Lowe, I had an interview with him and he talked about it. There's different levels of it.

So some people will think, well, I don't have a problem because they look at a problem as someone that is hiding liquor, drinking in the morning or all this kind of stuff. Right. That's what you tend to think. And then, but your problem could be, I

I just like when it's time to drink, I just go a little too, I go too far. Right. And I don't know how to turn it off when I need to. The same problem I have with food. Like I can kind of be, I'm having the same issues with food. I can be okay. But then you hit a point of just starving and then you just, and then it just goes, and then you eat a hundred things that are bad. They say like certain people's blood have like an allergic reaction to alcohol. And when they drink it, like it's,

And that's what happens to me. Like two beers and I'm like, you know, people go, let's go have a couple of beers. And then I'm out the rest of the night. Yeah. Because I'm like, oh, yeah, two beers gets me ready to go. I think we were the same way. It was just, it was just, it was that kind of, it was that. I'm like, I'm almost drunk. Let's do shots, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Let's get into this. Yeah. I got to be home soon. Let's get it. Let's get going. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was never a big shot guy, but it was...

Yeah, that was, that was, yeah, it would be, it would be fun. Yeah, that was not a bad thing to say. It was, you know. We're having a good time. Let's do some shots. Then the anger comes. Yeah. And then you're like, we flipped a switch. Yeah. I'm blacking out. Yeah. Let's get some food. Yeah. Try to come back to reality here. Took a turn. Yeah. Yeah.

Why am I bleeding? Yeah. You light a cigarette off the house that you burned down. Yeah. And then you sit there and go, I'm going to get it together. Yeah, it gets in your way. And I can look at food exactly like that. I don't know if I have. I am down. I've lost weight. But I'm trying to spin it positive. You did overcome it, and now you are selling out of ringness. Yeah, yeah. And then, yes. And then I might be going to that place.

I don't know. But it's... Yeah. I should have saved that story for then. Well, we'll see. I can't remember. But it's... Yeah, it's a positive. Yeah, it's a good thing. I mean, even then, that's the other part when you know, I don't want to be doing this. I shouldn't be doing this. It's keeping me back. And then...

You know, that's another part where you do realize you have the, once you start, you know, they always tell me, no one's going to quit until you want to quit. You got to want to quit. You got to know this is not, I can't, I don't like this. But you just are still like, all right. You don't, you almost like don't know what to do. Yeah. And then you're able to stop it.

Yeah, because you never drink. I mean, you would barely drink. Yeah, and I could have one and be done or two or whatever. Yeah, and three, four. I had a problem, actually. Now think about it. I could always stop, but I was like, look, I'm going to do 10 tonight. So I went out and I did 10, but I stopped at 10. Yeah, exactly. Why should I stop? You have no control. You have all the control. I wasn't trying to do arenas, so live it up. I still drink every night. No, I'm joking.

Yeah, food's like that too. Yeah, food's going to become. This week I did good. I've been at 1,800 calories. Going back at it. Going to get down. Going to get down. Cigars are like that for me too. Like nicotine is really like that. Like I went like, I don't know, almost a year without a cigar. And then I was working with Aaron and we were in that West Nyack. And I think I had my first one in like a year. And then I had probably five that weekend. I'm like, it really opened up.

Yeah. Oh, that was good. Yeah. We'd sit outside the hotel till like three in the morning. Yeah. Just talking nonsense. Yeah. Yeah. It's the time for it. Yeah. Well, it's like. You could do that on the podcast. Yeah. It's talking. Maybe, yeah. Maybe I'll talk more. Get a cigar. Maybe you have a good time. Yeah. Well, cigar, it does change a social environment. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, you're committed.

To talk. That's a big part of it. Yeah. There's not a, you got to go? Are you trying to get out of here? I mean, you're both. This is a 45 minute commitment. Yeah. Not when I smoke cigars with Dusty. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Brian takes off early. It's earlier than normal. He's like, I got to get out of here. I can't get this thing lit. If I can walk. Yeah. I'm going to go back to my room and throw up.

Where were y'all at? I was at the Grand Ole Opry Saturday night. Great. I mean, every time I'm there, it's such an honor to be there. Everyone's so nice. And I mean, that's 4,000-something people. So it's just amazing. Don't try to top me, dude. And hundreds of thousands on the radio, too, dude. Yeah. Don't top me. Yeah, you're right. I was doing an open mic. Yeah. Yeah. You were.

You weren't even broadcast. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Not in his private. He'd go, everybody can do a private show. Secret show over here. So I did Grand Ole Opry Saturday night. That was great. And then last night, Sunday night, I was at Stand Up Live in Huntsville, headlining there. A lot of folks came out. Yeah. That's awesome. A lot of folks came, met a lot of folks, and it was great. That's awesome, man. I was in Syracuse, New York, at the Syracuse Funny Bone. Wow.

Good shows. Two. It was supposed to be three. They said, hey, we'd rather do two good ones. And that's fine with me. They were two good shows. But I had a major victory. I mean, three out of four flights this weekend, nobody in the middle seat. Wow. Three out of four. We ended on one with somebody in the middle seat. Would have been nice to end on. Was that a layover? Yeah, it was with a layover. Where was the layover? Baltimore. Oh, so pretty. It was pretty packed. Baltimore coming back to Nashville. It wasn't like an Atlanta to Nashville. No.

But it was a two-hour flight. Three out of four with an empty middle seat is like, I mean, I might never get another one in my life. Yeah. Southwest? Southwest. Oh, yeah. You get the exit row or anything? No. No. That's strategic. Exit row, it's always going to be full. Yeah. If you're choosing middle seats, people are going to pick the exit row first. So I always go typically right in front of the exit row in a regular row, and that way the middle seat –

We'll not get taken that often. You take the window? I take the window. Yeah. So you'd rather more distance wide than long. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. I would take, I'd rather, yeah, I'd take a foot off a leg room to get a foot to the left. Oh, you'd move it. If you could trade like inches between leg room and hip room. Yeah. I'd take the hip room all day. It is nice to not touch arms or legs. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And I'm like, if it's a small person, I'm like in front of the person next to me too. Oh, yeah. If we're packed in there. So they're like behind me, you know? You like to do that? I like to get in behind. No, I don't like to do it. It's just how my body works at this point. I like to wedge in behind. You get behind them? Yeah. I don't have the luxury of that. So I'm kind of in front. I would get... No, I just take my seat.

I just stay messy. I don't know. What do you get behind them? I like to get a little bit of the armrest behind, you know, so that way it's just more comfortable. Yeah. So they can get the front of the armrest? Yeah. Okay. I prefer the back of the armrest. Yeah, I'd prefer the back too. It's their call though, don't you think? I do think so, but it just depends on the person. Sometimes I'm like, I'm going to go ahead and just do it. You think you can bully the person? Yeah. Because it could be a nice old lady that's not going to fight. Right, right. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll lay on her shoulder. She's probably got her hands on her purse anyway. Yeah, exactly. She's like, this guy's going to go through my purse. Yeah.

Yeah. In a second. I offer to watch the purse just so she'll hold it. Do people think you're getting relocated a lot on a plane? Well, I get upgraded. Like going to Florida, they go, oh, it's happening. They're flying you to Florida. I get upgraded a lot, and I think people think I'm not supposed to be there. One-way ticket. I did have the Admirals Club. They gave me the Admirals Club for American Airlines as a perk, and it expired forever.

on April 1st and I didn't realize it. So I got rejected going in very embarrassing. And you're like, ah, April fools. Yeah. I was like, but I was like, ah, I was like, nah, I knew it'd run out eventually. They're like, do you want to renew? I'm like, nah, I'll just go. I'll just go back out where I belong. Yeah.

And then there was a TSA agent out there who was like, hey, Dusty. And I thought he had seen some of my tweets or something. I thought I was in trouble. But ended up being a nice guy. He had been to my comedy in Dallas. Yeah. TSA agent. So I'm making some friends. Yeah. That's nice. Yeah. Yeah.

Where were you at this week? Comedy Works, Denver, downtown. Hot club. Legendary club. Five sold out shows. Wow. Hot shows. A lot of podcast listeners. A lot of people wishing me Happy New Year in there. Oh, really? I'd come to the stage. People are like, Happy New Year. That's awesome. And I'd say, Happy New Year. I was like, a lot of these people are not going to get that job. Yeah. They don't know what's going on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I have a lot of hay bears and-

Hello, folks. And yeah, it was nice. You met our intern. Oh, yes. Yeah. Yes. It was very nice. She pulled a, of course, everything Seinfeld related for us. But you know how on Seinfeld when Kathy Griffin's character sends Jerry with

with some gift. And then even though she's about to see him herself, she emailed me on Friday and said, could you wish Nate a happy belated birthday for me? I'm like, sure. So I'm like, great. Now I got to add this to the list of things. Then she sends me a picture on Saturday with you guys at the show or whatever. And I emailed her back and I said, why didn't you just tell him happy birthday yourself? And she's like, oh, I forgot. Yeah, I told him or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She told me. Yeah, it was very funny. Yeah, yeah, that's funny. How often do you relay a hi to somebody?

Somebody says, tell him I said hi. Do you ever actually do that? I say I will a lot. I don't even think it's about that. I think it's just... It's just about recognition that we know somebody mutual. Yeah. Because what else do you want out of that? But I do it a lot, too. Tell him I said hi. No.

I got to have dinner with Sandler. Didn't we talk about that? Mm-hmm. He said hi to Henry Cho. Did you relay that to Henry? No. That's one worth relaying. That's one I would want. Yeah, that's worth relaying. Henry. Henry might like that. Henry, Adam said hi. Yeah. I meant to text him, and Henry actually just texted me. It's like I did not mean to not text him, but it was like he said that, and then we were eating, and then it was late, and then I drove home, and then you just end up

I think about it every day. If it's one that I know, I do think about it every day. I go, I got to do that. And then I don't, I won't not think about it. I got an email I've been thinking about for about a year that I'm like, I got to email this person back. Do you think it'll happen at some point or is it...

I think I'll eventually email him back. Yeah. I did that. I had a guy that I went to high school with, but I wasn't really friends with him. Sent me an email just that he had been watching my comedy. And like, I didn't really know him that well. And he was like older than me. And I was like, it's still like, even though he's like, you know, now I'm like the celebrity kind of thing. He's like emailing me.

And saying, hey, I've been following you. But I'm still like, oh, this was an upper class button. I still feel weird about the email. And it took so long to email him back. And then I finally did. And then he never responded. And I thought, now I wish I had not sent it. Yeah.

Now I'm back. I feel like I'm back in the lower position here. Right. He said hi to Foxworthy too. Did he really? Yeah. So I got to do it. You got a lot of work. I got a lot of good stuff going on. You know, he might be able to reach out to some of these people too. I think he could, but I mean, it's like, you know, they're not like connected, you know, really. Yeah.

Yeah. A lot of times I feel like I'll be the connector of some, especially the older guys that like are like in their real lives and career, like, you know, whatever. And then as you're coming up, I'm still just meeting. You start to meet, you become friends with these people and you kind of are, you know, loose friends, but you get to meet them. And, uh,

hang out and it's awesome and so you just end up being the younger one you sometimes end up being the connector right but you're not doing a good job of it i'm not uh so i need to go and in in the audacity that i think how insane it would be that i wouldn't relay a message from sandler to foxworthy and like who do i think i am you know who you could hook them up with who zoc doc oh

Oh, look at that. Oh, that was weak. Come on, Jeff Foxworthy. We were talking about anything medical. Well, Jeff and Henry, they're probably going to need a good doctor pretty soon. They need one. My dad said something funny this weekend because we were talking about when we get home. He's like Seinfeld's dad where they're like, just book him a late meeting. He goes, these old men get up at 5 in the morning. They're wiped by 5 p.m. Yeah.

So dad's like, doesn't tell me. We're getting home today on the bus. So I always get home late.

The way I look at it, I'll get home at like, I'm not a big get home at like 6 in the morning. I want to get home at like 11, 10, 30, 11. I want to just get a full night's sleep so when I get off the bus, my day here is usually we're doing a podcast. I'm like rested. Otherwise, I'm going to sleep four hours and then get up and then try to sleep again. You'd be all messed up. Then dad doesn't tell me. Dad's like, I got a doctor's appointment tomorrow at 9 a.m. I'm like, Dad, we're in...

You know, Youngstown, Ohio. I'm like, we're not getting home at 9 a.m. He's like, all right, I'll get mom to move it. And I was like, why don't you tell... I was like, I told him that. I go, I want to get home at 11. I want to start my day and do my work day. And he said, well, my regular work day involves a doctor. Pretty funny. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Every... Just a normal day for him. Oh, yeah. I think that's how doctor stuff is going to go. Like that. Not in person? Yeah. It's going to be...

You know, it's, yeah. Like, it's just, I feel like it's a, you know, I don't know. I think doctors could just go that way. Just Zoom with me, get me the pills, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And I've always wanted to invent. Oh, boy. Some kind of, I mean, I don't even know if this technology exists, but I would like to just, let's say I hook up to you, Brian. So you just feel, even if it's for like five seconds, you just feel whatever I feel. Yeah. Yeah.

You ever think about that? Yeah. So then a doctor could diagnose you. Because then they know right away. Because it's really hard to describe what you got going on sometimes. Yeah.

That poor doctor, though, he just got to feel that all day. It's like John Coffey. Green model, yeah. Oh, gosh. Actually, I got bad news for you, bud. Yeah. He just goes, all right, go ahead. Get me out. Get me out of here. Stop it. He's like booking you way out. He goes, I need a second. He comes back. He goes, I don't know what that was, but I can't do it again. Hey.

I had no idea you were dealing with that. He was all day long walking. Yeah, can you imagine being a doctor and having to feel everybody's pain? Yeah, it'd be crazy. That's a lot to throw on them. But I bet there'd be a lot more accurate diagnoses. Yeah, but you're throwing a lot on the doctor. Like, you're going to have doctors then just be like, I mean, who's going to want to be like, I want to feel a spasm in my lower calf? That doctor would be wanting to get you fixed for the follow-up. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, that's brutal. Yeah. That's a pretty tough thing to invent as saying something you want to invent.

Most people want to invent like a spoon, like the spork. Yeah. Not people are inventing. You're trying to send a power over to another human. And you said, I don't know if this technology exists. I hope it doesn't right now. Yeah, but I bet it will at some point. They hook up to your nervous system. Because I've had stuff where I can't describe it. Then I feel like I'm an idiot the way I'm describing it. And I'm not sure they understand what I mean. If I could just zap them with it. Yeah.

The foot thing's a great example. The gout. The gout.

The gout? Yeah. Yeah. Remember when he went, they couldn't figure out what. It was on this podcast. We diagnosed you with gout. Yeah. Yeah. You have his gout. It's like, you know, sometimes I burp all the time, right? So I saw this like gastro, whatever they call them, like a gastro person. Yeah. Right? It was supposed to be like this. Entrologist? Yeah. It's supposed to be like, all right, this is finally it. I finally got the appointment I want. And the guy prescribed, he told me to get Gas-X.

I sat there and talked to him for a long time. He told me to get Gas X, but he used whatever the ingredient on Gas X is. So it sounded like he was really recommended something great. And then I couldn't remember. And I asked the front desk, I go, what's that he recommended? She goes, Gas X. And I'm like, okay, so this appointment has led you to an over-the-counter gas.

thing that I've tried. Tones. Essentially. Yeah. The appointment has led you to go, there's a gas station right over here. They have two gas section. I just gave you real problems going on in my life and you recommended gas, as if I'd never tried gas. Is this it? Some methacone? Yes. He's like, yeah, get you some some methacone. And I go, oh, okay. Well, that might help. That does sound fancy. Yeah. That is funny. Gas X. Gas X. Gas X.

I never heard from that guy again. It's like, you did not fix the problem. Did you go to that doctor and the office is gone? Yeah, I mean. He moved. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, he was in a hospital. I don't know what they're up to. He goes, Betty, wrap it up. They're on to us. Yeah. Pack it up. He's like, ginger ale? Like, what is this? And then I went to like a,

whatever you call like a natural doctor kind of thing. People would say that they're like kooks, you know, I went and saw them. They were like, the lady goes, oh yeah, this is it. And then it fixed it. Now I don't have that problem. And like, so they're like, what was it? Well, she said, it's like a hiated hernia is what she says. If you have too many stomach problems, your stomach can actually lift,

in your chest cavity and cause the thing that traps in gas that it won't close. So there's like a move you can do to where you like push it down. So I started doing this move all the time and it like fixed the problem. Do you have to keep doing it every day? I haven't done it in a while. Okay. What's the move? You know, you lay on your body and you just kind of, you like really dig in there and you push down. But it worked. Whereas, you know, she didn't go take some gas X

Here's some Tums. Get out of the office. What's your insurance? She moved your organs. Yeah. Yeah. She goes, you just need to rearrange those organs in there. She had him do it. Yeah. You just got put together wrong. Just go ahead and push. Yeah. So it's amazing. If you could be your ideal weight, but –

Yes. No longer have any interest in food, but be healthy. But somehow there's technology where you never want to eat again. You'll stay your ideal weight. You'll be healthy, but you'll never enjoy food again. Would you do it?

Yes. Do I still find joy in other things? Yeah, just food. I still live a fulfilled life. I still have passions and dreams and aspirations. Yeah, you don't feel hungry. You feel just, you're super healthy. My younger brother's like that. He does not find enjoyment from food. He eats these like just powders that are just meals called like smool or something like that.

He, that's how he eats and he gets no joy from food. Hmm. And it's a great thing. I mean, I'm jealous of him. Yeah. Yeah. He's at a, he's at a good weight. I do it. Purdue grad. Yeah. That's my younger brother. Oh yeah. See, I don't have any weight problem. So I would say no.

But there's a lot of – yeah. I beg to differ. I mean, like I like food and I – Yeah, your stomach's too high, dude. What are you talking about? Yeah, I'm not saying it always treats me right. But yeah, I don't really gain too much weight. Do you feel full faster because it just gets to it quicker? I guess so. I mean, it just –

It just feels like it goes in there and then just doesn't digest. And then I just burp it all out over time. And it's like, I've been on stage before. Before I go up, I go walk around and just burp a bunch. And then I get on stage and I feel like just the whole time I'm up there, it's just building up inside of me where I can't wait to get off. So I just burp again. You ever let it out on stage? Only small ones. Okay, off mic? Yeah, off mic. Okay. Sometimes it's funny on mic.

I don't think people would think that mine are funny. If you need new material. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you know, he'd burp a little bit. Well, I do talk about it. You got a stretch. Do you talk about burping? Yeah. You could have a good-timed burp, a well-timed burp in your act. I just don't think people would like my burps. They're not like a fun, like you remember Revenge of the Nerds? You remember that movie? They had that character named Booger. He would burp, and that was fun, right? Mine aren't like that.

mine are not fun mine are like are you okay yours are medically concerned yeah I had a guy featuring for me one weekend and he goes he had featured for me a bunch but he goes if you die I'll be like well he was burping a lot because it was pretty intense yeah yeah it gets wild there's foods I have to avoid you know things that are hard to digest a lot of breads real hard to digest our bread's not good

in the world out here. Well, in the country. I don't know about the world. Yeah. Our bread's bad. You ever look at the ingredients on bread? There's a lot going on in there. I don't think we need all that. I was like, I thought it was grains. No. It's some methicone in the bread, probably. Yeah. Whatever. Gas X. Yeah.

Let's talk about gas sex. We're going to get them. All right, we're getting some comments from you guys. Dave Pierce, I'm a 61-year-old blind man. I listen to the Bible instead of reading it. In Genesis 10.24, there is a name spelled E-B-E-R, Ebert.

I guess. In English, it is pronounced hay bear. Oh. All right. I thought that was pretty cool. Also, being blind, I struggled to find things to come to my 27-year-old son. We can't go hunting, fishing, or even ride motorcycles together. Your podcast gives us something we can talk about. That's great. That's what I love to hear. That's cool. Who do you think reads the Bible on audio, an audio book? I do it sometimes on a plane.

Let's do it. No, what kind of voices? Oh, it's like an old school-like, powerful kind of voice. Oh, okay. James Earl Jones type? Like that type, yeah. Does he do voices for the characters or is it all pretty straight? There is some where they'll do the New Testament where it'll be characters. And it'll be different people, though. It won't be the one person. They kind of act it out. The British?

Like British gives it a little bit more authority. Yeah, British sounds official. Authenticity. Oh, totally. Yeah. That's not our Bible, though. Yeah, that's true. The British Bible. From their own little stuff. King James, that's American. Yeah. I like a real Southern accent on the Bible. Yeah. Yeah. Taco Nacho.

Nate, at 44, you should be riding a bike, not running. Trust me, I'm two years your senior. Those knees and shins are shot.

Good advice. Yeah, but what if you'd not been running all this time? Your knees and shins might be pretty fresh. They might be fresh. They might be fresh. My wife's dad is in his 60s, and he runs miles every day. Wow. Miles. I don't know how many. Yeah, it's going to be like that. I think I would like riding a bike. I just don't like riding on the road. I'm annoyed when there's bike riders, and then I don't want to be that guy. And I'm scared. It's dangerous. Yeah.

Yeah. In the full Lance Armstrong outfit. Yeah, I tell you. In the lanes. Yeah. And I mean, you see some of those bodies out there riding those, wearing that tight stuff on. A couple dudes, you're like, good night, dude. You're like, I don't know, wear shorts and a looser shirt. I don't know if that stuff does make you feel better, I guess, to wear the tight stuff, but-

You want to go, like some of them, you're like, it looks like a walrus riding. There was a comic I used to know. Comic I used to know back in the day, he would say, they're like a human can of busted biscuits. Yeah, it looked like he's swallowing the bike. Christy Pickens, can we get Dusty's dad on the podcast? He sounds like a character. Dusty, would you like to meet your dad? Yeah, if you can find him, I'd love to have him on here. Yeah.

Now, my dad is a character, but he doesn't, whenever I've tried to get him on my podcast before, my dad is like, he doesn't really do a whole lot of technology stuff. So when you put a microphone in his face and set him in a room, it changes a bit. He's not, he's like, he doesn't really. That's probably, yeah, it's a good trait to have, I think. Yeah.

What about when he met Jeff Foxworthy and Leanne Morgan? Well, he's very excited about it. I had a call with Jeff Foxworthy and Leanne Morgan, a Zoom. And then when we were about done, my dad was at my house. When we were about done, I texted my dad and told him to come into the room. And so he came in and talked to Jeff Foxworthy and Leanne Morgan. Very exciting. Yeah. He loved it. That's awesome. Yeah.

Yeah. We had... You tell them Henry Cho said hi. Yeah. Yeah. You should have said something. I should have. Why does Nate have to do everything? Yeah. We said this weekend at a funny... It was going to come off mean, but it was pretty funny because...

Chase, our assistant, and then Dusty. Like a lot of comics, they have some, usually a lot of them have some, their dads are not around or whatever.

And so we were all throwing football, and I was throwing football with my dad at Riley. And then I told them, I was like, you want to get on here so you can feel what it feels like? Well, you're Chase's dad. Yeah, Chase is my assistant now. So if you don't see him out there at Merch, that's where he's with me now. I still never told him that we had told people to go say that. We did pranks last week, and we never even mentioned that one. Yeah, yeah, that's one.

So in Raleigh, North Carolina, the day that I was there, I got it. It was declared. It was Nate Bargetzi Day. Whoa. Yeah. So it was a pretty big day. We have a video of it. I'm going to end up posting about it. But Sarah Crawford, y'all have met her. Yeah, we met her in Raleigh. Yeah. So awesome, super nice. And so she gave us pins.

to give to y'all. She's a state representative, right? Yes. North Carolina House of Representatives. Yeah. So she gave us all pins for you to have. This is to commemorate Nate Bargetzi Day. Does this get us out of tickets and stuff? It might. I mean, if you're part of Nate Bargetzi Day. All right, if I get in some trouble in Raw, I'm pulling off this pin. She did tell me, Dusty, yours has a microphone in it. They're listening, Dusty. Yeah, they're listening.

She goes, it's all working now. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, very cool. Thank you. Really cool. All right. Ethan Runnels. On April 1st, 1974, the residents of Sitka, Sitka, Alaska, woke up to see the dormant volcano they lived by was spewing thick black smoke.

Many people panicked and called the police, and eventually a Coast Guard helicopter was sent out to investigate. When the Coast Guard pilot approached the volcano, rather than seeing any lava, he found a huge burning pile of old tires. The words April Fools were spray-painted in the snow beside the tires in 50-foot letters. Wow. Wow. That's pretty funny. That's a big prank. Yeah. Also, isn't that pretty bad for the air? Yeah.

Yeah. I think his email goes on to say, this guy apparently did not care about the environment. He just wanted to play a prank. A guy who had access to that many spare tires. Yeah. Well, 1974, no one's caring about the environment. That's true. I lit a tire on fire one time, early 2000s and in the trailer park. And I mean, here we go. I used to build fires all the time. Right. And we had a couple of old tires out there and I just, they always say don't burn a tire, but I didn't really know why. So I wanted to see what the big deal was about. So,

So I threw a tire on there and started burning it. And it is thick. I mean, I never seen anything like that. The fire department showed up. I mean, I didn't get in trouble, but people were just like, they kind of were just shaking their head. Like you can't do that. Yeah. Just black smoke. Yeah. Just thick. Just a, just, I mean, I've never seen anything like it. I mean, I've built fires all the time and this was wild. We were kind of freaking out. Yeah.

And then, yeah, what we thought would happen happened. People showed up. Yeah. Your dad's a prankster. I bet April Fool's, did he do anything? On this one, our friend Everett, his magic friend Everett, him and his wife have been coming to my shows forever. Forever.

I feel like I've met them. Yeah, they were my, yelled at by clown taping. I mean, they've been coming and driving to stuff. And so, you know, so it was very nice to get to see them. And they got to see one of these big shows. And they're just the best. But he told them he got his car towed.

And so on April Fool's. And then he had a security guy going with it. He goes, yeah. He goes, I got the number of the thing. You got to call him. Go down there. It's like, call Ted. He goes, well, it's parked. Because we said they could park by the bus and all this kind of stuff. And so he did like that. I know he did that one. And then I think that was it. Yeah. He might try to do something else. I don't know. He messed with your water once on stage, I remember.

Yeah, what did he do? I think he just put his finger in it when he was out there before you. You didn't see it. And then later on, every time you drank, everybody in the crowd would be like, ah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anna Chernchenko. My friend's brother had the best senior prank. He and his friends brought three chickens to school and numbered them one, two, and four. So the whole day people were looking for the third chicken. That's very funny.

Yeah, we got some. People said they did that with pigs. Same thing. They would leave one number off, so you just keep looking for it. Yeah, that's very funny. Yeah. Who's got all these pigs out here? We only need three. Yeah, but it's like... Three that you don't mind if they go missing. Where are the pigs at? They just bringing pigs to school? I imagine these are some...

like, you know, outside the city. Yeah, some rural areas. Yeah, I don't think it's going to be MLK downtown. Yeah. You know? Like, where there, I think it's, there's going to be, there's pigs and chickens. People got a lot of pigs. Yeah, we went to Cooper, Robertson County, Cooper Town. I went there from, my dad taught there, and I went there second or fourth grade, and that was out, you know, where, like, kids would miss school for tobacco season. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They had pigs. They could get pigs.

Jared Taft. I lived in an off-campus house my last year of college, and one night some girls decided to roll our house. To get them back, my roommates and I gathered up bags of leaves from our neighborhood, snuck into the dorm rooms, emptied them all over their bedrooms.

We felt like that was an appropriate response. However, the unintended consequence of this was that there were crickets inside the bags of leaves that hid in their rooms. The girls had sleepless nights for weeks due to the crickets chirping at night, and it nearly ruined our relationship with all of them. Oh, man. Worth it. You don't think about that? Mm-hmm. I bet they didn't roll the house anymore, though, huh? Yeah.

Yeah, that's true. They learned their lesson. They learned their lesson. Yeah, it's like. Yeah. They needed a good pesticide salesman friend to get rid of those crickets. You would have got rid of them. Yeah. Yeah. We would have fogged that place up. Yeah. Their dorm room. Yeah. Do you go clean them up after? The foggers? No, the crickets. The dead crickets. Oh, no, you let them go. That's their job. Yeah, sweep them up. Oh, you sweep them up? Yeah, you let them sweep it up. Oh. I mean, if you find a dead cricket, just go ahead and get rid of it.

Yeah. But as a service, you don't then come in and- Well, I didn't actually spray. I sold pesticides. I wasn't a pesticide man. I just sold it to people. I told them what to do with it in their own home. Okay. Okay. A lot of people think that, that I was a pesticide sprayer. What do you call that? I wonder why. Yeah.

An exterminator? Yeah, I was a salesman. I had my shirt tucked in. But you understand why they made that leap.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I get it. Could you have done it? Yeah, I could do it. I had a buddy that was an exterminator and he had to go under the house a lot. I don't really like that. I'm not into crawling under the house. He would come to my house and he was supposed to go do a job and he would just come to my house and hang out. And then he needed to get rid of all the chemicals so it looked like he did the job. So he would just let it go in my yard. Right.

I mean, who knows what happened to that guy. But why would he tell the people at the house? I don't think he cared, really. I think he would just tell his boss he did the job. But wouldn't they care? I mean, it went out of business, that company. He didn't work for Terminax. Yeah.

Seems like they would know he didn't come to their house. Yeah. I mean, I didn't ever got behind his logic too much. I just know he would go, I need to get rid of some of these chemicals. Yeah. Yeah. You could have done that for sure. Yeah. I was just renting. So I was like, yeah, dump it out, man. Spray the house. I mean, I lived in a trailer with no insects. I'll tell you that. Yeah.

Y'all sprayed it a lot. Yeah, it was crisp. Yeah. And it was not that clean. Well, y'all are under direct fire. Yeah, burning tires. Yeah, your house is in the woods. Yeah. Yeah.

Rachel McCartney, as someone who has worked for men's warehouse for many years, we are a part of lots of practical jokes that gruesome men like to play. My favorite was when five grown men paid hundreds of extra dollars to rent outrageously wrong wedding tuxedos just so they could prank the bride at the rehearsal dinner. It's usually fun and I'm totally here for it. That's funny.

Oh, the bride just has a meltdown. Big money pranks. Yeah. Christina Marshall. My husband was close with friends with his...

My husband was close friends with his RA. So the last year they lived together in the dorm, he ordered 1,200 ladybugs off of Amazon and then dumped them in the RA's room under one of the beds. After a while, the ladybugs began to spread out all over the place. My husband looked on with delight while pretending that his RA was exaggerating the situation. You can buy ladybugs? This surprised me too. But yeah, you type in ladybugs on Amazon. There are a lot of options here.

I also see that you could buy the Rodney Dangerfield classic ladybugs. It's 1,500 live ladybugs for $5. And they deliver it? They deliver it. And it's got a thousand rating. It's got a, like the reviews are a thousand. Yeah, you can order it. I ordered some dormant bees one time. Why? Well, you know, like, you know, they pollinate.

You know, they pollinate your flowers and vegetables and stuff like that. And so you just shook them out of a bag and let them go in your yard? You keep them in the fridge and they stay dormant in there. And then you set them out and they start to come alive and just. You just set them out on a flower? Yeah, you kind of set the package, whatever they came in, just set them out. And they just, as it starts to warm up, they come out and then you get your little pollinator boxes. And then they start to, you know, put bees in there for next year, whatever they do.

You have a lot of bees. I don't know how well it worked. Yeah. I might have kept them in the fridge too long. But some did come alive. I saw them come alive. This guy said 80% arrived dead. This one says about 50% to 70% were alive. And he gave them five stars. Yeah. Or she did. It's Michelle. So that's pretty good. I mean, by 1,500, you get...

What is it, 800 that are alive? Yeah, I don't know why you would do ladybugs. I feel like they just eat your plants up. This Julie Keller, who said 80% arrived dead, said purchase these to get rid of spider mites. Okay.

Apparently ladybugs will just wipe them out. I had no idea they served any purpose. Except for good luck. Are they good luck, the ladybug? They say if a ladybug lands on you, it's good luck. Oh, I've never heard that. Yeah. That's what they say. It's like how 80% die before they get there. Yeah, that's why she only gave it three stars. Still, three stars is great for, you know, basically she's being like, she got...

What is... She gave an update. A few days later, most of the bugs that were alive are now dead and clogging my pool filter. Yeah. And I still have a ton of spider mites. Right. And I still have a ton of spider mites. So the purchase was not worth the money or time. Still three stars. That's an honest review, though. Yeah. That's the review that you want, where it's like, she still gave 30 stars, being like, look, I get some should be dead. I thought a little more should be alive than it was. Turns out I made the mistake. Yeah.

They were all dead when they arrived. It was worth the money had they been alive. What's it cost? $5. Okay. But shipping was $10, I think. $5 for even dead bugs is not a bad deal. Even better. Feed the spiders or something at least. Yeah, $5 and $10 delivery. You can buy $54 for $9,000? Yeah, $9,000.

I'm about to order some ladybugs. I didn't know you could get them for five bucks. They are general predators that feed on a variety of slow-moving insects, including aphids, moth eggs, mites, scales. I've never heard of any of these. Mealybugs? These sound made up.

Live ladybugs are good bugs, great for kids, birthday parties, and school projects. What kind of birthday party bringing out the ladybugs? 80% of them are dead. You just throw them on the table. And the other 20% will be dead if you bring them out at a kid's birthday. Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. Learn something every day. Yep. Tyler Baker says,

Aaron, I can totally sympathize with the furosity of parking garages asking for a tip. As a native Houstonian, I'm familiar with this faux pas. That's right, right? Fox pas. Hakeem Lajuan owns a large majority of our downtown parking garages. Wow. So please don't blame our wonderful city. Blame one of the city's biggest icons and its greatest basketball player of all time. Thanks, and keep the good times going. He is one of the greatest. Definitely.

He owns a large majority of it. And they asked for tipping? I don't know if it was his company, but it was in Houston where this happened. That's so crazy. Pier Lizit. SpaceX has two kinds of rockets. The one Nate saw was a Falcon 9. It takes off from Florida, but in the booster, what you guys call rocket, lands far off land on a ship in the Atlantic Ocean. So Nate couldn't have seen it.

Even if you have waited nine for nine minutes. The other rocket SpaceX has is the Falcon Heavy. And these boosters come back down to Cape Canaveral where it launched from. But they only use it once every few years. That makes me so happy. Oh, yeah. Because it was, yeah, that makes me very happy. Because I was like, how did I not, how did we not see it? Yeah. Yeah.

It feels like what you would say if it doesn't land where it's supposed to. You go, ah, this is the other model. Yeah. It lands in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I like that thinking. Lands on a ship. Yeah. I wonder why. Ship with no cameras on it. You're like, oh, no, this was the Falcon 9. It lands in the ocean on a ship. I wonder if you just go to Elon when you go, but why don't we just do it where they... I mean, if you have the other one, like, why are we...

Right. You know, you're either going to go to the ship or you're going to bring it back here. Why are we doing two? And he's like, ah. He's like, let me put a chip in your brain and I'll tell you. Eric Phillips, just wanted to clear some things up about the discussion about SpaceX rocket launch. Ah, here we go. The Falcon 9 rocket, when launched in Florida, will land on a barge in the ocean. On the West Coast, though, they can land the rocket back on the launch pad. The difference is due to the rotation of the Earth.

Quotation mark. Yeah, yeah. Also, these rockets have stages. So only the first stage lands back and another rocket fires up and continues to push the payload further into space. Hmm. Looks like it contradicts a little bit, doesn't it? What the first guy said? No, he's saying on the West Coast they have... Doesn't rotate over there. You got to be honest with you. I don't know who I'm going to believe, Pierre Lizette or Eric Phillips.

Pierre sounds like a guy that built the rockets. You're like, well, that guy's a scientist. And Eric shows up and you're like, hey, come on, Eric. You do this every time. Maybe he owns the battery. Maybe he's a family of the Phillips. That's true. Or the screwdriver. It could be big money. Yeah. Yeah. Phillips screwdriver. Yeah. Yeah. So he could have his hands into it. Yeah. That's true. Grady. Grady.

Anytime Brian goes five minutes without saying a word, you know he has an advertisement in the chamber. Oh, yeah. And the satisfaction that briefly goes across his face when he gets that perfect opportunity to plug it into any conversation is in itself comedy gold.

So this week, I asked Amelia, our intern, when I saw her, if she knew what we were talking about. But I think she's on next week or something. Yeah, usually she would know and you wouldn't. Yeah. But this week, I told her just to take a week off because we had a couple in the chamber. Yeah.

We're talking about recycling. Ooh, getting to the bottom of that. And the Bible. Oh, both together? I thought I, you know, last year we did Easter and taxes. Yeah. Two things that Dusty doesn't believe in. But this year we're going to do, you know, it's Earth Day this month and it's Easter this week. This year only one thing I don't believe in.

Yeah. Well, I know you don't celebrate Easter, but you celebrate Passover. Yeah. So I guess my question is, do your neighbors complain when you kill a lamb in the front yard and paint his blood on the doorpost? Well, you do something like that, people don't really ask a lot of questions. They're like, keep the bunnies away from that guy. Yeah. No, I don't do it like that. Yeah. You don't do Easter though? No, I don't do Easter. I do Passover. Yeah.

I just, you know. So what do you do? You eat a Passover meal? Yeah, I just do a very simple thing. I just read like, you know, Exodus where they talk about Passover and then I, where Jesus has the last supper and, you know, talks about, I mean, a lot of people, they don't know for sure, but they speculate that the last supper was a Passover meal. So you just eat lamb, bitter herbs, vegetables,

I do grape juice, not wine, and then unleavened bread. And I just read that stuff and then we eat that. And that's really about it. Let me tell you something about

leavened. That's what makes bread good. That is true. I don't know what leaven is, but unleavened bread is not good. That's true. But they have the matzo crackers and that's what, so then after Passover, you have the feast of unleavened bread. So for a week, you don't eat any bread with leaven in it. You just eat the unleavened bread and, uh, and they're good. I mean, the matzo crackers, you do some cheese, you do some peanut butter and, uh,

I don't know how to make this, but the matzo crackers that I buy are just like, it's almost like saltines, but a big square. Yeah. Where do you get unleavened bread from? Well, you get them any grocery store as matzo crackers. Yeah. It's more like this one with the- This one? Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

That looks like a pizza crust. And you eat it all week? Yeah. Yeah, no bread. So you're on it right now? No, no, it's the Wednesday. Well, it will be today, tonight when the podcast comes out, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's cool. And until when? A week after. Oh, for a whole week? For one week, yeah. You feel different?

I like it. I mean, I've been doing it for years. I mean, people, I mean, none of my family does it, you know, I mean, not my immediate family. My wife does it with me, but I mean, like, you know, so, you know, most people think I'm crazy for doing it, but I like it. I think it's fun. Yeah. You know, it's good. Do you think it plays a role in why your stomach's upside down?

I don't think so. But I used to do it even when I was on the road. I've done it in hotel rooms. I did it at a condo at the Grove one time, that cabin in the woods. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Me and Dan Whitehurst. Really? He was like, I'll do it. I don't know what we're doing here, but I'll do it. I'll go along. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. Well, the Bible was the first book ever printed. We're starting with the Bible. Was

Was that all right? Yeah. We'll do that, and then we'll get into some little recycling. Okay. A little fun there at the end. Yeah. The printing press, the Gutenberg printing press, was one of the greatest inventions, I guess, of all time. The Bible was the first thing printed, so that allowed everyone, the masses, to be able to read the Bible and not just the Pope or the people that Aaron chose to read.

To read it. Right, right, right. People that know what it is. Yeah. I'm just kidding. You mean Aaron here or Aaron from the Bible? Well, I was talking about- Moses' brother. Well, maybe I was named after him. I bet you were. The King James Version is the most popular one.

That's my favorite one. And why is that? I don't know. I like it. I feel like there's more fun stuff in there. In King James, they talk about dragons and giants and some of the other versions, they eliminate a lot of that and really kind of water it down. They just change a word here or there. It's not like they leave out whole verses or chapters. Some of them do. Some of them do. Well, okay. No.

I mean, some of them do. Like NIV, you can read some, and I don't have the specifics. Yeah, NIV, we got three more books. Yeah, you can read, and it'll be like, you'll go like verse 18 and then verse 20, and then 19 will be gone altogether. Oh, okay. Yeah, NIV's got some wild stuff going on. So the Bible's got some...

artifacts that are, you know, some people think are still out there. In Raiders of the Lost Ark, he was looking for the Ark of the Covenant. And in the Bible, it said when the Israelites had the Ark of the Covenant, they'd go into battle with it and they could wipe out anybody that they encountered. If someone touched it, which someone accidentally did because it was just to stable it, they died on the spot.

And then Raiders of the Lost Ark, when the Nazis got a hold of it, they wiped them all out. Indiana Jones is okay because he shut his eyes. So there is real debate about where is the Ark of the Covenant. And there's a church in Ethiopia who claims to have it. And they won't let anyone see it. There's one monk that guards it year round. He's the only person who can see it. And he dedicates his life to guarding this Ark of the Covenant. When he dies, someone replaces him.

But supposedly it's at a church in Ethiopia. How did it end up there? I don't know. Over years of years, years of it being stolen and passed down and things like that. This is the guy, huh? Yeah, they say Ethiopia has, their Bible has the book of Enoch in there too. The Ethiopian Bible has that. So they did, so the, like you can go look at it or look at the building. You can't look at, yeah, I think you may just look at the building. I mean, a lot of people obviously question whether

There's anything in there, much less the actual Ark of the Covenant when no one's allowed in it to see it. Yeah, but I bet they're like, you know, you're like, well, just prove it's there. You're like, well, if I prove it's here, then you're going to just come take it. Take it away from us? Yeah, like a military, an army is going to. And why would they lie about it? Is it like a tourist attraction?

Are they charging money to look at the building that holds it? I don't know how many people are fond of Ethiopia. Yeah, that's what I mean. Like, why lie if they don't have it? Well, they could also not be lying, just be mistaken. Yes. I think they have it in there, and it's not, you know. Yep. It's the Ethiopian Orthodox Church, and it's been there for a while, but one guy guards it. So the other ark, the Noah's Ark...

Some people think they know where it is. So in the Bible, it stopped at Mount Ararat, which is modern-day Turkey. And there's some explorers who over the years have claimed to either gotten close to it or seen it, and then the government comes in and stops them.

So there's a guy, Richard Carl Bright. He's an art seeker and explorer. He says there's a multinational government conspiracy to hide the truth about the Ark. And Turkey, Russia, and the U.S. all know where it sits, but they keep people out from getting it. Yeah, like they say the Smithsonian will do that. It kind of swoops in and will scoop up everything and then take it. And then speaking of Indiana Jones, at the end of that movie, the first one,

He donates whatever he finds. I forget. I just watched it, but I already forgot. But whatever he finds in that, he donated to them and then they put it in a crate and then you see them store it away in the deep depths of this giant warehouse. Yeah. It was the Ark of the Covenant. Yeah. Okay. And yeah, he comes out mad because he's like, they don't know what they have and they just store it. Yeah. Like you said, in some warehouse. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I think maybe no one would know what it's, you know. Yeah. It's almost like you couldn't know. That's what I think. It's like buried under that. I think they think that's it. Oh, really? This picture we have pulled up. Yeah. It's like the calcified arc. Doesn't look like it to me.

Yeah, there's people who claim to have seen it. It's usually snow up on the mountain, but occasionally when the snow goes away, they'll see little bits and pieces of it. They'll have to fly over it. They'll have to do satellite images. Oh, like they can't get to it. Yeah, it's very hard to get to, I think. What makes it so hard to get to? I don't know if the Turkish government makes it hard, but I think just the terrain. It's very remote, rural, snow-covered. It'd be like...

Maybe similar to hiking the Himalayas. I mean, you would think they would go figure it out. Yeah. That's what's crazy. Like, that's what I don't understand. Like, that's either you just think, so no one's going to go see? Why would you not go see? Right. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. I think they know. Yeah. I think people, and they're like, oh, it's a mystery. Yeah. Or there's nothing there, so there is nothing to go see. Right. Or they just let you, yeah, they want you to think it's there. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, really, it's like, I always think about that, right? They go, oh, Mount Ararat, it's modern day Turkey. It's like, but do we really know? I mean, who knows? I mean, someone's told us that that's what it is. But do we really know? Maybe it's not. Yeah. Maybe it's, you know, the Smoky Mountains in Gatlinburg, for all we know. You know what I mean? That could be Mount Ararat. It could be. It could be. Who knows? We'd be able to...

Now that you're home, you're going to be able to go to an Easter service this Sunday? Yeah. Sorry. You sound like my mom. Yeah. It did. Very accusatory. Just went right into that. So, Nate, are you going to be able to find time for your family this weekend? Yeah. Are you going to be able to find time for the Lord? Yeah.

Well, there's also some gospels that did not make it in the Bible. There's four gospels, of course, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. There's the Gospel of Thomas. Doubting Thomas. Yeah. Yep, yep. He's like, I doubt this will make it in. They found that in 1945. I never make it in. Yeah. They go, Thomas, you're so down. He goes, you'll see. Yeah, you'll see. Give it some time. Yeah.

The Gospel of Mary Magdalene. Yeah. Gospel of Judas. Even Judas had his own book. Yeah. These are the Gnostic Gospels, right? Yep. Yep. They didn't fit the canon creed. It didn't seem like it fit. I think it was the Gospel of Judas. There were depictions of Jesus electrocuting people. He had like...

Crazy. Superpowers? Superpowers, essentially. Yeah. And the Catholic Bible has more books than the Protestant Bible, right? Three more. Yeah, yeah. Maccabees 1 and 2, and then the Book of Wisdom. I think you'd leave that one in, huh? I've read a little bit of Maccabees. Yeah? Yeah. Just exploring a little bit? Yeah, I got a book with a bunch of those. Enoch and Joshua. I thought it was seven books. I don't lump Maccabees in with those. Yeah. Those, you know.

Yeah, I do. Just cover all your bases. Yeah. Yeah. See what everyone's talking about. Just read them all. Yeah. The Book of Wisdom, would that be Solomon? That would be a book he wrote? I don't know. Okay. Not real familiar, huh? It's not one of the more popular ones, but it's in there. It's a B-side for sure. Book of Wisdom. I'll get to it. I'm smart enough. You might ask about recycling. Was there recycling in the Bible? Well, kind of. There was a garbage pit.

Called Gehenna. And in Jesus' time, he even referenced it. And it was outside of Jerusalem and people took all their trash and they burned it. And they kept the fire going around the clock to keep people's... They would take dead animals, dispose of bodies that didn't have tombs and things like that. And they would burn it in these garbage pits. It was kind of referenced in comparison to hell. So even in Jesus' time, they had some type of trash system.

so to speak. I'm segwaying now into recycling. He's getting right into it. That was pretty good. Yeah, so the Bible's done. Well, I mean, I didn't feel like there was a lot of momentum here going through. No, no, no. I've got multiple pages, but... Yeah, I hear you. But I didn't feel like there was a lot of momentum here. There's a lot of phrases. I'm going to go back to the Bible now.

Yeah, let's go back and forth. I'm into it. Just go back and forth. I'm having a great time with it. I mean, there's so many phrases we don't even know. We may take for granted it's from the Bible. Reduce, reuse, recycle. The three R's. I was going to keep trying to juggle back and forth. Well, that's not one, I don't think. Scapegoat. Scapegoat. Oh, yeah. What does that mean? Apple pie.

What a scapegoat is? I know what a scapegoat is, but where did the phrase come from? That's from the goat of like, they would put all the sins of the community on that goat and then push it over a cliff. An actual goat. Yeah. Something like that, right? It's from Leviticus. A goat chosen as the scapegoat. Yeah. And I don't know if they pushed it off a cliff, but they killed it to kind of make it as a sacrifice. I like to think they threw it off a cliff. Yeah.

Good Samaritan, we've all heard that. That's the most humane death you can think of. I like to think that. If that goat has all the sins, let's go ahead and throw it off this cliff. Just make sure it's dead. Make sure. Yeah. The earth, I mean. Someone just runs there and goes, hold on, hold on, hold on. All right, go. No good. I had one more I wanted to tell you about. Yeah. Just throws it in. Hold on, two seconds. Oh! I got one more here. Yeah.

The Bible even predicted a lot of things. A guy does his own goat. They push that one goat off, and the guy does his, too. And you go, what are you doing? He goes, I needed my own goat for what I got going on. I needed a hole. You don't even want to know. That goat's got a lot of weight on it. Original goat couldn't handle. Couldn't handle. It's like that doctor where you transfer the pain. Oh, yeah. You need a whole goat for just this guy. Let's get another doctor in here. ZocDoc.

So back during biblical times, most people thought the earth was flat and that outer space didn't exist. Long time ago. The Bible, there's some verses that makes you think they knew ahead of time that the earth was round and there's space. I'd love to hear them. I'd love to hear those too. Yeah. In Isaiah, he talks about God and he sits enthroned above the circle of the earth. Oh, the circle, huh? Yeah.

Well, everybody thought the earth was flat, so why would he call it a circle? Well, I don't know. I mean, if I did a circle right here, what's that? Flat? I mean... It's flat. I mean, that circle is. Yeah, right. But what is a ball? A sphere. Oh. Well, maybe that's what he meant, a sphere. Okay. I don't know if that term had been invented yet at the time. Maybe not. Dusty was ready for that one. All right. All right.

And then outer space, he spreads out the- I'm just saying. I just think about these things. I'm not saying- I know. I'm not saying it's flat. We're having a good time. We are having a good time. Everybody's having a good time. Yeah, we're having a good time here. You're doing flat earth stuff. I'm just doing a bit here. You know what I mean? We're just being a good time. We're just doing a bit. Everybody, there's no outer space. I ain't hurting anybody's feelings. Just doing a bit here. I watched that rocket go up at Elon Musk, and it took a hard right. I'm just saying. I'm just saying.

I'm just having a good time. I know it's in space. It's in there. Why did it go right? Just go straight up. Yeah. Back to your circle. We're just having fun. This is great. I love this. And then for outer space, there's a verse where he says, he spreads out the northern skies over empty space. He suspends the earth over nothing. Well, that is interesting. It is interesting.

Yeah. So that could be. Is space nothing though? Would we say it's nothing? Well, it's not held on something. So there's not, it's not like a mountain that it's sitting on top of. It says in the beginning, you know, God created the heavens and the earth. So he just kind of created it out of nothing. So it's not really sitting on anything. Ex nihilo.

What's that? I don't know. This is how a Catholic contributes to biblical discussions, just throws out a Latin phrase they know every now and then, ex nihilo, out of nothing. Oh, wow. So the Bible's been used in court since the beginning of courts, 13th century English court, made people swear on a Bible. And in the U.S., we say, so help me God. But in England, they say, by Almighty God.

But if you, some religions, Christian religions don't believe in swearing. So you can say, I affirm instead of I swear. Oh, interesting. Or if you're atheist, you don't have to do it. My grandma used to say that. You should never swear. Mm-hmm.

Like, she didn't mean cuss. She meant like swear. Don't even say, I swear. Yeah. But it doesn't have to be on the Bible, right? It can be on anything that you want. It can be on the papers you're holding right now. It doesn't have to be. Same with sworn in oath of office. Most presidents or people sworn in do a Bible, family Bible. But I think there was a Muslim congressman that sworn in on a Quran. Right. So you don't have to. But I could do it on Sports Illustrated. You could? Yeah. Yeah.

You could. I'm sure they're heading that way. What about this one, Aaron? The Four Horsemen of Notre Dame? Oh, yeah. That came from the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in the Bible. That's right. You know them? Because it was the end of the world for every team that played us, dude. I like that. I don't know what they are. What are they? Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Death and destruction. Despair. Yeah. I don't know. But you knew that was from that.

I think so. I know mostly it's kind of transcended the other thing in my eyes. When I hear the Four Horsemen, I think of the four Notre Dame football players. You don't think about Ric Flair? I don't, no. I think about the Four Horsemen. Arne Anderson, Ole Anderson. Is that what they were called? The Four Horsemen, yeah. You ever seen this iconic image right here, the four football players on the horses? No. Really? That was them. 1924. 1924.

It's a big year. And they had to ride horses to games? No, I don't think so. They were just called the Four Horsemen, so they did a promotional shoot of them on horses. Promo stuff back then. Yeah. It's all fake. Media Day. Media Day. So those were the four. 1924, they had Media Day. You go, where are you going to put this out on? And just go, for the room. For the room. I'll hold it out. Yeah, yeah.

Those are the four-star players for Notre Dame, right? Yes. But do you know why they were called the horsemen? Last four they've had. I think it was just what you call just a group of four that are really good. Like the Yankees had Murderer's Row. Okay. And then you had four stars, right? Well, they're the four horsemen. What else would you call four people? Four musketeers. Quadrant. Actually, it would have been pretty funny. The quartet. Yeah, there you go.

Barbershop. Yes. Football quartet. Four square. Yeah. It's a game. All right, now I'm transferring back into recycling. So the very first public waste was actually done, system was in Athens, Greece in 500 B.C. They made everyone haul their garbage out at least a mile out of city limits. And by 320 B.C., they were telling people, don't dump your garbage on the streets.

So even in Jesus' time, they were telling people, pick up your trash. Don't be littering Jesus. When I was in Europe, they had like a canal. The canals were like so bad because everybody would dump. I think in Amsterdam, they would just dump the trash. Or maybe it was actually Brussels. It's a road now. But it used to be a river in Brussels, right in the city. And it got so bad because everybody would just throw their trash everywhere.

In that river, just because that's just what you did. Was it the Seine River? S-E-N-N-E? I think so. Yeah. Yeah, it became a dumping ground for industrial waste during the second half of the 19th century. Yeah. Sure. I hear there's a trash strike in France right now in Paris. Yeah. And it's really like piling up. The average person creates almost five pounds of trash per day. Wow. I believe that. Five pounds. But I'm using this, this, this.

What have I done today? I've just done this and this. Does that include body waste, too? I don't know. I don't think so. It's like sometimes when I'm on the road, I'll go to the grocery store for the weekend and just eat in my hotel. And it is amazing how much trash. That is true. I mean, you get the bags, the packages, the, I don't know. If you're eating fruit and you got all these rinds and peelings and-

It is. Well, that's all biodegradable. That's fine, right? It is. Just bury that in the park. Well, at home, I compost it. I just put it in a bin and it just breaks down over time. But in a hotel, you throw it in a bag. You don't take your trash home with you and do it there? I don't. I would like to sometimes. I'm like, I got all these eggshells. But you put it in a plastic bag and then it never breaks down. I don't feel like you can get pulled over having a bunch of fruit trash in the back of your car. Yeah. I don't think that's going to go good.

When I used to drive, I have kept stuff like that, and I would just drive it home with me. Yeah, but it would look weird. You're right. Yeah. What do you got all this fruit for? Oh, I like a compost. Yeah. I'd tell him that I'm powering my car with it. Oh, that's good. Yeah. I'm Doc Brown. The big recycling push thing now is single-use plastic bags. So it takes them 1,000 years to decompose, they say.

uh, one single bag and some States have already eight States have already completely banned, uh, single use plastic bags. And then some companies are starting to do it like Walmart in three States have done it. Then you got it. So then you got to start using reusable bags that you can buy for 10 cents or 75 cents or whatever like that. But now they're starting to pile up.

Because a lot of people have it delivered to their home, and then they got all these bags to their home. So now they've got 100 and something bags stuck in their house. So they got a new problem. A new problem that they're getting to make a little money off of, though. A little bit. What do they go do with those? You got to recycle those? Yeah, eventually. Yeah. I mean, they're reusable. It's still a good thing, but now people got new bag problems piling up. I don't even know what recycling. What do you go do with it?

Yeah, you can take them to the grocery store and they have bins outside where you can put those plastic bags back in. But that's what I always think. What are you doing with them? Yeah. Well, they're reusing them, right? But like how? Like how are you recycling those? Yeah. All this relies on, there's not like a, you know, some authority that you're like, well, I trust that. It all relies on people that are getting paid minimum wage.

And you're just going like, no, we put it in there. I think you just, it seems like recycling is all just like, well, I don't want to talk about it too much, but put a tube there that goes there, done. And then they walk away. Yeah. And you're like, well, I'm the guy that cleans that tube. Like, what do you want him to, is he a doctor? Like, it feels like you'd have to be like a scientist. Oh, yeah. Like, you know, for the recycling. Like, someone's going to have to be super smart. At some point, that bag has got to get to someone else.

Extremely smart. Yeah. We used to just burn it. I mean, styrofoam just disappears like that. I mean, it is gone. I mean, that seems like the way. Tires, not so much. Tires are tough to burn, but plastic and styrofoam. But you know, that matter's not gone. It's just different. No matter's created or...

Matter's never gone. But it doesn't matter to him anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not my matter. It's gone for you. It's gone. Like I put, one time I was trying to put, I couldn't get the, had a safety gas can and I couldn't get that, couldn't figure out how to get the gas out of it. So I thought I'd put it in a styrofoam cup and then pour it into the lawnmower. I poured gas in it. It just ate the cup up. Yeah. The gas just ate the styrofoam. Whoa.

I tried that in college. I ran out of gas one time, had a styrofoam cup, put it in there. It did not work. I just saw it wilt away in my hands. But like it does, it's got to get, where's it going to go? I feel like it's got to get to a facility that's got some real, you know, someone that went to school for this. Yeah. Recycling plant where there's

engineers and such. Now Greenpeace did a study last year that showed only about 5% of plastic actually gets recycled. 5% total or 5% that's given to recycling? Just 5% of total plastic? No, I think given to recycling, only 5% actually gets recycled. Whoa. They said there's seven types, different types of plastic. And if you look on a plastic bottle, most of them have that little symbol that

which I think you said earlier, recycle, reuse. Reduce, reuse, recycle, yeah. It's like a little triangle. I don't know if you guys know what I'm talking about. Usually there's a number in that recycling symbol. It's one through seven. Okay. And if it's a one or a two, they said it usually can be recycled. Three through seven, it usually doesn't. Meaning like? Like plastic bottles, I think, are a one or a two. Maybe that'll say what it is.

Two's a milk bottle or laundry detergent. So it can't be recycled. One and two usually can be recycled. Yeah, one and two, it says usually clear plastic used to bottle beverages, salad dressing, cleaning sprays. It's one of the most easiest plastics to recycle. Two, stiff plastic bottles, milk bottles, laundry detergent containers. And then three to seven is just like, good luck, dude. We cannot recycle this.

grocery store bags, dry cleaner bags, plastic bottle caps. So they can't recycle plastic grocery store bags? It said this is almost never. I mean, I think it's difficult. I think they're working on it. I mean, at the Publix, they have a little container where you can go put your plastic bags in. And that's what I always do after it fills up so much under my sink that you can't possibly get another thing under there. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, Laura tries to bring those bags with her. Like, she does that, you know. But, I mean, I never remember to bring a bag. No. I think she leaves it in the car. But, yeah, people are doing the thing where they order now a lot. You can order your groceries.

And then, so if they do that, then it's like. We ordered groceries today. It came in paper bags. I'm okay with paper bags. I'm like, just give me the paper. I'm okay with it. Give me some good handles though. You know what I mean? Yeah. Paper bags, we turn them into book covers for all the kids at school. I think we did newspapers like that. Newspapers. I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. What school did you do this for? Yeah.

What do you mean? That's how all the kids that got our book covers, you know? You could have the- Oh, you as a kid. As a kid. Yeah, yeah. I didn't provide this for kids recently. I thought you were doing it for kids. No. Like, y'all school was like, you know what? We got a school right down the street from us. They don't have book covers. Yeah. Just cut the pages. So-

We go and take our trash and then we make it their book cover. Yeah, we drop our trash off at the local school. We drop it off and we go, you're welcome. Yeah, here's some book covers. Yeah. Looks like trash now, but you can work. Yeah, yeah. I think I remember making book covers out of that. And you could draw on it then and do whatever you want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could really have fun with them. Just.

Just wanted to go through something. You know, this weekend was a lot. It was like doing a lot of big shows. So you're like, I don't want to get into like a new movie. Let's just zone out. Zone out. And so I had Peacock. So we had the Peacock app because Laura's watching Yellowstone, I think. I think that's on Peacock. And we got it for – Oh, Paramount, yeah. No, I think it's on Peacock. I think she can watch it on – I think it's on Peacock. Okay, okay.

So we got it for that reason. And so I was like looking at it. Like I'm not watching Yeltsin. I'm not a big Western guy. And so I watched John Wick and it was like, oh, they have all three of them on there. And I was like, oh, look at that. Like I'll download and watch it. And I mean, I'm paid for the thing with no ads. It all has ads. Wow. Yeah. I don't know. Like, yeah.

You're like, why do you, but you're like, I'm paying for the thing that has no ads. Did you pay for reduced ads or was it no ads? No, no, no. I paid for no ads. They're killing us with ads. YouTube is full of ads. Even iTunes, like the people will do an ad that I know is on the podcast, but then it'll be like an extra ad that iTunes has just put on it. Yeah. Well, you hear due to streaming rights, a small amount in programming will still contain ads. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like they're- A little fine print here at the bottom. I'm at the gas station getting an ad. I mean, everywhere you go, there's an ad. I've tried your thing, hitting different buttons to stop the ads. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I pay for YouTube, no ads. It's great. Yeah, me too. I mean, we're saying this, we just read an ad, so I'm not trying to- Love ads. Yeah, we love ads. Ours is, the podcast is free. That's right. That's the difference. The difference is- And when you have funny people reading the ads, the ads are funny. Yeah. They're fun.

Yeah. Yeah. You're supporting this, supporting all of us, supporting the world. And these great segues. Segues are fun. So it's like, yeah, not trying to make fun of ads, but it's the idea that you're like, well, I'm paying for no ads. And then you put the main movie that you know everybody is going to go watch.

Because the new John Wick is out. So everybody's probably about to go watch one, two, and three again. And then you put ads in it and you're like... And then it'll be like on a lot of those streaming networks, it'll be the same ad every time. Like you're watching a movie and they keep... That's like, give me a new one at least. Whopper, whopper, whopper, whopper. I mean... Yeah. Well, and sometimes for kids like Miss Rachel or Cocoa Melon or whatever, they'll put up a...

an advertisement for a show that's kind of scary for a kid that'll be watching Cocoa Melon. Yeah, some ads are getting, they're very inappropriate. Yeah. Where I was watching some of the Harper today, and you're just like, this is like a kid's, you're like, this is, this is, you're doing a commercial. You're like, what are we doing? You know? It's, yeah, that stuff's crazy. We pick our ads according to what, like there's a lot of ads I wouldn't do.

Because of whatever reason. I try to advertise on here, our website. I don't want to represent that. Yeah. It's got a certain set of standards. Yeah, your website's wild. You got a lot going on. You don't have to pull that up, Aaron. Okay. Pull it up. Let me see what his website is. BrianBatesComedy.com. That's not a bad website. No, you just redid it recently, right? You should almost have...

That about that picture be that picture up there though. So that's why I didn't want to bring it up because you guys are immediately going to pick it apart. Yeah, yeah. But you should... That one's like... That whole image right there should be the top of your thing because that would be a cool... You know, that looks like...

You know, it's like I'm going to go see you talk at noon. A cash for gold seminar somewhere. I would do. I think it's a good pick. I would do noon comedy. It is a good pick. But the pick right below it is awesome. Thank you. Nice action pick. And that's a great picture. What's going on? And you got the, well, it's probably wider too. Fit like on the wide back. Maybe, yeah. But I do like the white.

Do you know, here's an interesting question. Sometimes I'll see jokes from my act and I can just tell exactly what moment of a joke that picture's from. Do you know what that's from based on your motion right there? Could that be anything? I mean, I could guess. He's asking the people to get into it. Come on, guys. Why aren't you laughing? Is this thing on or what?

I mean, you get a little animated, but that looks like a unique kind of moment. I mean, I could have been fake just for the camera. Yeah. That was after the set. I feel like I could almost pick it. I'd have to think about it. I could pick where it's at in your act. You're a little harder to do that for. Yeah. He's standing there with his arm behind his back. Yeah. Could be his clothes. Could be, yeah. I'd stay in ovation right there. I don't know what's happening. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't even know how we got off on that. Dusty, you strike me as the kind of guy who knows the trash person. Well, we know you've gotten in a fight with the trash guy, but even the dump, you probably know the lady who runs the dump. Well, you know what? I found the dump in Nashville and took some stuff there. And I went down there and I read reviews. Apparently, there were a lot of reviews for the dump. And I had no idea. People were like even reviewing it going, I can't believe I'm

leaving a review for the dump, but they were like, but the lady was just so nice. And I was like, how nice could this lady be really? So I took my stuff down there. I had never been. And she was so helpful. She was so nice. She came out of the, she came out of the booth, was showing me where to go, showing me what to do. I was dumping all my things. I was like, like, and,

And we left and I was telling my wife, I was like, that was an amazing experience. I said, I got more trash. I think I'm going to go back there later today. And she was like, well, I'm not going with you. So I loaded up more stuff and I went back a second time, same lady, way different experience. She was like, what do you got back there? And I was like, well, I got some trash or whatever. She goes, well-

If you had it in a bag, I wouldn't charge you. And then I had to pay her like 10 bucks. She was telling me not to dump. She said the cardboard thing's full. And I had a bunch of cardboard. That's really why I was there. She's like, it's full. And then so I'm like over there by the cardboard thing. I see it's not full. People keep coming and throwing their cardboard in there.

there. I'm like, what's going on around here? So I go over to the lady. I'm like, I'm not trying to break the rules here, but I can fit my cardboard in the thing. And she let me do it, but she gave me a lot of attitude. It really changed. I was going to leave a review, but I decided, you know what, at best it would be three stars. So people leave reviews about dumps? Yeah. In the Nashville Davidson County dump, there's a lot of reviews. It's probably about that person. Is it because you came twice?

Like, I mean, she could have just been like, all right, dude, like you're doing too much. Maybe, but I, you know, I mean, you should have saw the trash people were bringing there. But if people are bringing trash to a city dump, I would imagine, shouldn't that be encouraged? Like, isn't that the point? Like, you're like, oh, for recycling and for not having trash everywhere, we want you to bring it to the dump. And then you're like, don't bring it to the dump. She's like, the cardboard thing's full. And I'm like, well, that's why I'm here.

Residents are limited to two visits a day, so you were pushing it. I was pushing it. You were pushing it. But it's like you should have saw the trash people had out there. I mean, I got cardboard and a little trash. I'm not. I bet they got some. You could have felt like a guy, this guy's going to come every day. And he's going to be. And that could be it. Yeah. But I didn't mind giving her the $10. I don't even know. It just seemed like that was. She was just like, go ahead and give me $10. Yeah. What's the $10 for? $10.

I guess because I brought some trash not in a bag. I had it in a cardboard box. Yeah, but where does that money go? I don't know. I think to her, yes. Do taxes pay for the dump? If it's a government program, yeah. That's how it's funded. So what is the $10 for? I think for her lunch. Oh, I would be fine with it, honestly, if it went straight to her. Yeah. I don't think it does, but there's an infrastructure around it. That's what I mean. I honestly would be like,

You know, I mean, it'd be a place of tipping, but if she was like, well, it's not in bags. And so, you know, just being like, since you didn't want to put it in bags, I'll let you do whatever you want, but you got to give me $10 and I'll keep my mouth shut or something. Like, then you're like, okay, if it goes to you, I don't mind buying your lunch. I had that oil. I had peanut oil for two years that I was going to do a Thanksgiving. It's just been sitting in my garage and there's nowhere, you can't take it anywhere, but they had a place for old oil. And I'm like, well, it's new oil.

But I'm still going to dump it in there. Dumped a lot of peanut oil out there. I got rid of a lot of stuff. Like, where is that oil going? The ocean.

Yeah, they say they're recycling it, but where? A lot of it goes to the ocean. But what do you do? You literally pour it into something? Yeah, into a big vat of oil. Just out at the dump? Yeah. They bury a lot of it, too. They have glass containers. They have cardboard. They have all kinds of stuff. Yeah, I feel like if you really got into recycling and you just asked questions, because you'd be like, okay, you asked that lady-

You get to the farthest question that she's going to know. Then you go, all right. You go to the next person, next... I mean, it's just going to get to like... Someone's like, I don't know what happened. Right. And it gets so spread out. That's like, well, we ship it to Atlanta and they have a facility that takes it to... Right.

I think along the way, they call you dumb for asking all these questions. You just have to power through that. You'd have to power through that and go, well, we're not called, you know, you can't talk to that guy. You're like, well, I would like to talk to that guy. And that's that way with everything. There's no answers out here. Except.

In the Bible. Yes. Well, that's true. That is true. Transfer back. You know, there's been pictures people share. I've never seen this myself, but there's been pictures people shared where they'll show, you know, like a container and it'll have two openings and one will say recycling, one will say trash, and then you lift up and it's all just one bag. It's one big trash can. No, that's Elena's Airport. Yeah. I've said it on here. I was trying to do it as a joke too. I don't know what to do, but go to Elena's Airport.

Anybody's listening to this, you might be in Atlanta's airport. If you're in Atlanta's airport, go look at their trash where it's separated, where it has the three different circles on the top. If you look in, it's not that. It's just a flat one, and it's got the three things. And if you look inside of it, it is all just one bag. It's not that.

It's like just the plastic, I guess, goes to the right, and then this goes left, but it's in the same bag. And I can't imagine someone's doing it. I don't even see where there's at. Unless they just changed them. I'll look for Atlanta specifically. Yeah, Atlanta's airport is all that. And you look in, you're like, what are you doing? They don't have the separations they have. It's on the top. It's the ones by the gates. Yeah. Yeah, go back up. Go back up.

There to the right. It's kind of that kind of thing, but it's that size, but it's got all three. It's like this one, but... Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But it doesn't look like that, but it's exactly that. Yeah. Like where it's just one trash can. And it goes in the same thing. Yeah. I tried to find where trash in the airport goes, because you've asked that question before. I found one article, Seattle Airport, talked about where the trash goes. It's...

It wasn't still clear where, I mean, not crash recycling, where it goes. It just goes somewhere else and then somewhere else. Somewhere where you don't have to worry about it. Things like that. Other people do. Yeah.

Yeah. Not much of it gets recycled. That's according to Greenpeace, and they would be the ones that I would think would get to the bottom of some things. It just makes people feel good. That's why I don't get into it. I mean, I would love to be able to be like, all right, I'm saving these cans. These cans are going to this place, and they're going to turn it into more cans. Amazing. I think cans are – I'm sorry to interrupt. It's one of the things that does get recycled pretty easily. Well, we used to save cans when I was growing up, and you go get money for them.

After you get so many cans, you could recycle. You get like 20 bucks for a giant bag of cans, but it's like, it's something. Yeah. And I'm into that, but I'm just like, I'm not into doing all these things for nothing. Yeah. Laura's a big recycler. Like Laura, like she likes it and-

She and she, I do it by just because, you know, you got to hear it if you don't. And you got to boom, boom, boom. You got to ring. Well, I hate littering. I hate littering. It's a good thing. Huh? I think it's a good thing to do. No, I know. I'm joking. I'm just saying. As a husband, you don't do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just do it because you got to boom, boom, boom.

right behind you. All right. I got to take the bottle cap off one and put it here and do this. And then she'll just come in randomly and be like, we're not doing that anymore. I'm like, well, I've been doing it like I'm supposed to. It's a good thing, but it's not a good thing if you don't, because there's a point where you can go,

A lot of good, a lot of little good things mean nothing if it's not a bigger thing. Right. So like, who cares if you're like, you get to feel better, which is almost, you could be like, well, then there's no, I mean, you're like, so what? Like, you're happy that you do it. And then you get to go, you know, I'm saying that you like personally, like you get to go like, well, it just makes me feel better. You go, yeah, yeah. But you're, it's going nowhere. Yeah.

And there's nowhere for it to go. And there's no solution to it. And it's getting worse. Shoot it to space. Shoot it to space. Burn it. Shoot it to... What if it would just disappear in space? Mm-hmm. It can't... Elon Musk, he's just sending up these rockets and sending them back. Put it in there. He says Saturn's like gas. Like, go throw it at one of these other planets. Yeah. Shoot it towards Mercury. Yeah. Let it burn up. Yeah. Yeah.

Let's build a giant trash slingshot and get this stuff out of here. Slingshot it up. Why is Elon Musk not working on the trash rocket? Well, actually, somebody should say that because next episode, we have a comment from someone who sent us an article about a slingshot that we could send trash to outer space. Oh. So. Well, let's do it. About time.

Get some solutions around here. Yeah. Yeah. You could go ahead and pull that up if you have it since you brought that up. Yeah. There is a, it's called a spin. There it is right there. A revolutionary space catapult receives funding for first launches. And it's huge. Yeah.

It's hard to tell how this works. I can't wait to live near that thing, and it doesn't quite make space. It comes back down. What's it throwing up there? I was learning satellites. Yeah. SpinLaunch, which already has the backing of NASA, so you know it's legit, announced its latest funding round this week, bringing the total amount raised to $150 million they've raised. It's the world's first kinetic launch system.

capable of delivering satellites into orbit in a way that's cheaper and less environmentally damaging than conventional rockets. Oh, so they're not shooting trash up there. Well, but I'm saying in theory, well, if you once you got this in place, let's throw some trash up there. The person who sent us this...

That's what they were suggesting. We've talked about this before, sending trash in the space. But they would do, like that's the part where they say it's cheaper and less for the environment. You're like, I don't know. Then rockets. You're like, you can't tell me rockets are the problem when we don't know where this trash is going. Like you said, there's something in the size of Texas. I think it's mostly about the cost. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. No, I know, but they still say the environment. They still mention it, yeah. So that person says environment because then they get to go and everybody just reads that and goes, ooh, well, that's good. They're going to try to find – these rockets are really bad. And you go, well, there's the size of Texas trash in the ocean. Yeah. So until – the size of Texas, right? Isn't that what we said? What if we put trash – The great pit that just goes in – Essentially, yeah. Trash in volcanoes. What about that? Open volcanoes. Fill them more. Just put the trash in there.

Because it's still, first of all, well, you got to logistically, how do you do that? Trash around volcanoes. Around volcanoes. So then when it erupts, burns it all up. So that way, if there's an eruption, well, there's a silver lining here. Exactly. At least that trash is gone.

It makes it feel 10 times more. At least now there's a bunch of toxic fumes all over the place from this burning trash. It would just cover it right up. I would imagine that recycling is a very profitable business. Yeah. And so then that's why there's not a giant solution. And it's going to eventually get to someone that goes, I don't know.

Just throw it over there. I can't talk about this right now. We have this big project over here. So I'm dealing with that right now. We're trying to get all these people. Just throw it over there. We're trying to figure out a new way to launch satellites because we've got to make up for Elon Musk launching rockets for no reason. Because rockets are bad for the environment. You're like, that one rocket that I only see in Florida, but there's a trash the size of Texas floating in the ocean.

And it's like, well, that's fine. It would build a trash island out of trash. Yeah. Well, I'm almost, you know, do we just leave that trash there? That's what I say. And go like, all right, well, if the ocean's that big, no one's near it, I guess that's where the drain's at. And that's why it all gets to there. Because why would it? Spins around. Yeah. Well, it would be funny that there's a point where the trash is just going to. It's where the currents meet. It's where all the different.

Yeah, that's the drain. Yeah, yeah, like the drain in the middle, is what I'm saying. Yeah, it's the drain. And so then the drain goes there, and then everything goes there. So we just go, all right, well, let's just maybe block that area off even. It should be the size of America. Yeah, build it up. Maybe we can move there. Start doing some farming out there. You know what I mean? Do a little compost on top. Starts turning into some soil. All right. These are all solutions. These are all –

Yeah. I mean, because I was thinking about what's the web thing you use? Brave or something? I use Brave. That's the browser I use. Yeah, I was thinking about using that. Because then you said they accept cookies. You can just always accept them. Oh, yeah. They don't mean anything. You can just block all that. Well, you can block them or do you hit accept? I thought you did accept. So you have that VP. No, I mean, yeah, it'll ask you when you go to a website. So like Yahoo News, I'll just accept the cookies or whatever. Because it's going to.

Go away? And I'll just wipe them all, whatever. Yeah. Oh, I thought you accept them because it doesn't matter if you accept them because of the Brave or whatever, the VPN. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I'll accept it so that I can use this website while I'm on it. Yeah. But then when I quit and reopen the app, I'm starting over. Oh, yeah. So you don't have to go delete them. No, you can set it to where you'll just automatically remove. I use an app called Firefox Focus.

on my phone that's just you open it up and then it's it's almost like a disposable browser it's like when you close the app it's just like done doesn't remember anything doesn't save anything it's pretty awesome yeah yeah i need that yeah you get express vpn there you go that's the first step

So you mentioned- You use any of this stuff? I don't use any of that. Yeah. I mean, I just, you know, I figure they're going to find what they're going to find out here. All right. So say your email- I'm not really doing anything sketchy. Say your email and password. You just do a circle, flat circle on the page. You're not doing anything sketchy? Yeah, I'm not doing anything sketchy. I'm just watching things. What did you say? Say your- Say your email and password.

I got a lot. Why wouldn't you? Well, I wouldn't want someone to steal it. Well, there you go. But he's saying no one's going to target. Why would they go? You're just saying. Well, if nobody's going to target it, go ahead and just say your email and password. Nobody's going to log in and look at it. But then you're drawing attention to it versus he's saying just no one's looking at mine. This whole thing makes me nervous now. I'm just saying. I was talking to my brother about this. My brother's very into this stuff. And I said, I don't care. And he goes, well, just go tweet your email.

address and your email and your password tweet it it's a pretty good point never i wouldn't do that yeah so i care a little bit about privacy i may download this right after the podcast yeah uh our friend alex valuto just moved to nashville and he just put out a drive you ride drive our special and in the special he gives out his phone number in the specials real phone number

Just to see how many people are watching the column. Wow. And he hasn't got that many calls he's had. Really? No, he's gotten some. He's gotten a few. I was at lunch with him the other day, and he was getting calls from random people. Oh, that's cool. So that's a bold move to make. Yeah. For sure. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, that feels lonely almost. You know what I mean? You're like, give me a call. Well, I haven't seen the joke, but he told me. You got to hope people call. Yes. That dude, Dude Perfect, they do some things. So Harper and them, I like to do Perfect guys. They're great. And Harper and them watch all of it. And they told me that Cody, who I met, he came to a show. But he had to give his number out. And then, so it was fun. Like Harper and them were like,

You know, it was like texting them. They were nervous about texting them. And then so I texted from my number that it just went green. I mean, I think he's got bombarded. Like we called it. It just went to void. Like it was just too many calls. Yeah. And it was like so crazy. But it was like a funny story.

Yeah, you do got to hope. Like, I did a radio, and they go, caller number 10 to win free tickets. And I was thinking, 10? How about caller number 2? You know what I mean? Because I'm sitting right here. Yeah. 10 people did call, thankfully. But it's like, you know, you're like, caller number 10, we're live on the radio. What if eight people call? What if we don't get to 10? Right. Yeah. What if he goes, he goes, caller number 10, and you're like, dude, I don't know if you need to go that high. He goes, no, we're going to give them all tickets. You need. Yeah. I think that is probably what they do a lot of the time. Yeah. Yeah.

That was not what was happening. They go, you could use 10, 20 people. Yeah. They could use, you needed people in that crowd. Yeah. We sold out. You couldn't see. I want you guys to know. Could you see the phone lines? Is that this weekend? I had a corporate gig. I'm just kidding. Yeah. I had a corporate gig. I'm working. Well, he was sitting right there. He goes, are you calling number one? They would hang up on him. You're calling number two and they would hang up on him. Oh, live on the air. Yeah. Okay. So there is no getting around that. I was going to say, if there's a producer back there, they could just lie and say, you're calling number 10 when you're really three. Yeah. Yeah.

Was it quick? It was quick. Was there a long wait between six and seven? No, no. Thankfully, it all flowed. But I mean, I was like, oh man, 10? I remember doing that too, where they would do that, if you call or whatever, and you're like-

You're like, well, who's going to even call? But people want free stuff. Yeah. And so people will call. But I remember, I know what you're talking about. Like where you're like, it's very nerve wracking to be like, I don't know, it's going to be so embarrassing if they go, well, it turns out number four, we'll just give you tickets. Yeah. Yeah.

You're call number four, but you're the winner because the lines are empty. The lines are, yeah. Matter of fact, you got some friends. Try to bring them along. Yeah. Well, it's like that. I'm having flashbacks to the Wilson County Livestock Association auction when they auctioned off not one, but two of my CDs. That is my favorite story of all time. I mean, I've sat through the first one, then they did it again. It is my favorite story of all time. I want you to tell it to me every day. Yeah. Do you remember when you told it?

What episode or anything? It was, I think, probably during one of the stand-up comedy episodes. Yes, I think it was because we did two parts. Two years ago now. And I think it was the second one. I was going to say, so yeah, so if people want to go listen, if they haven't heard it, it's an unbelievable story. When you came and told me that story, I mean, I wanted you to tell it every time. I cannot. Yeah, I think I was crying when you were telling it to me. Yeah, it is. Unbelievable. Yeah. Yeah. Good.

Good times. Just because you're so nice and you went and sat in the audience. I would have left. I would have been like, mom, I'll pick you up in a bit. Yeah. My mom would have been like, I'll just go ahead and go with you. Yeah. There was nowhere to hide. I know. It was just an outdoor picnic pavilion. Yeah. I had to squeeze in. I'd take a walk. Yeah. Yeah. It was hard. All right. Let's end on that.

All right, everybody. Well, again, thank you for all the shows and all the support you show us. It means the world. We love you, as usual. Oh, y'all, where are you going to be? I'm home this weekend. Home this weekend? I'm home this weekend. This weekend, I am at Comedy Off-Broadway in Lexington, Kentucky. First time headline in there. Great club. Very exciting. We shot Greg Warren's special. That's right.

Yeah, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. All right. Come on out. That's a great club. I'm home this weekend, too. I may... No private? No anything? No, I may pop into a New Material Monday or something at Zany's, but I don't know that, but I may. Hey, y'all slacking off out here, dude. I'm the one out here grinding. You're the only one working.

I'm opening for Kevin Nealon at Zany's. Oh, that's fun. Oh. But I think that's tomorrow night, so this podcast. That was last night. I just want people to know I'm out here working. I'm living in the past. I'm doing stuff. Well, I did a corporate gig today. You did? I did today, yeah, before this podcast. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, wow. At 1.30 p.m. Huh. It went pretty good. Yeah. For that kind of time. Where was it at? Oh.

The Grand Hyatt Hotel in Nashville, downtown. It's a nice hotel. I opened and I said, it's nice to be here. Usually they don't let homeless people in here. And it did not go that well. It was for a homeless shelter. The rescue mission. All right. Yeah. We got Bridgestone coming up. A lot of dates. All right. Yep. We love you. And listen to you next week. Bye. Bye.

Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me, Nate Bargetze, and my wife, Laura, on the Audioboom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.