Shownotes Transcript
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Hello folks and hey bear, welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. I'm Brian Bates, of course, as always, Dusty Slay, and almost always, but returning after being gone last week, the wonderful Aaron Weber. Oh man, talking about me like I'm a deadbeat. I missed one week, dude. Yeah. I'm back. You're back. Back and better than ever, baby. You are. Let's do it. Nate's out this week, but- Thank God. Yeah. Yeah.
We have done several five-person podcasts, and now it's a three-person. So we really slimmed it down. We're still averaging four. Yeah. The last three weeks, we've gone five, four, three. So next week. Five, four, three. Just you and Dusty next one. Yeah. You'll be gone again. Yeah, probably. Yeah. And eventually Brian.
The way you've always wanted. Which is what he's been gunning for this whole time. Yeah. Just Brian alone at a huge desk. Two hours. Yeah. When he got working at Cable News, this is what you wanted. You wanted to be the one guy at the desk. It'd be more than two hours, though. Would it? Oh, yeah. You would go longer with less people. Yeah. I got a lot to say. Oh, okay. Yeah. I got some conspiracy theories out there below your mind. Oh, man. I'm into that. Yeah. I'd like to hear it.
Nate, Super Bowl commercial aired last night. It was awesome. Right in the middle of a great game. Yeah.
Well, they've thrown out every script out there possible except this one. The Eagles win in a blowout, right? Yeah. Was this an option, Dusty? We talked a little bit about it. I think it's the only script that was left. I don't – I sent you guys a thing that I saw on TikTok, and I thought, well, this is interesting. But I don't believe that the NFL is scripted. I believe they rig it through the referees. Yeah. Like wrestling. But –
I feel like a team, the only way a team can outmaneuver is the blowout.
You have to come out and you have to beat the other team so bad that the referees can't rig it. Yeah, that game, even if every call went in favor of the Chiefs, they still are not going to win. And that's what I think. A lot of the Eagles players are Christians, and I think they were praying and they were publicly praising the Lord. And I think he said, you know what? You're going to win the Super Bowl. That's what God does, pick sides in football games. Take that, heathen Chiefs. I think he picks sides in a lot of things. Yeah.
Well, you retweeted Neil deGrasse Tyson. I didn't retweet. I just commented. Okay. He asked, why don't they ever mention God when they lose? He said, blame God when they lose. And I was like, that's a weak take. But I...
You should be thankful. Always be thankful, win or lose. So you don't blame. You don't place blame on God. Because if God wants you to lose, then it's best for you that you lost. Did he say that after the game he tweeted that? I don't know. I just saw it today.
If there's ever a movie that you like or something fun happened and he'll find a way to just be a bummer about it. Well, it's like 10, 15, 20 years ago, Neil deGrasse Tyson was like, seemed like a cool, fun, smart guy, but he just puts himself out there so much now that it's like, all right, you really lost your credit. Him and Bill Nye. It's like, you guys have lost all your credibility and you're just out here
I don't know. Clowning around now. You should be thankful to God for all things. Were you ever into Bill Nye as a kid? Did you ever watch the show? I don't think so, no. We used to watch it a lot at school. Were you Bill Nye? We're the same age.
So, no, I did not watch it as a kid. Yeah, I'm sorry. Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill. We used to love it, dude. He taught us how condensation worked. Important stuff like that. Stuff I'm using as an adult. I mean, on this podcast, thankfully, we've never lost our credibility. That's right. In terms of science. Well, but we never claimed to be scientists. Do you know what I mean? That's the big difference. Yeah. Yeah, this is not Nate the Science Guy podcast. He's like, he's...
I don't know. It's like, I don't know. I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of either of these guys. He's not a scientist either. Did you know he was a TV weatherman? Bill Nye? Yeah, Bill Nye. He has a degree in engineering. Yeah. Which I guess is science, but not the science he acts. He's not wearing a lab coat. He does sometimes. I know, but I'm saying he has no reason to wear a lab coat. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Anyway. Well, Nate's commercial was great.
Oh, yeah. Sorry. It was good. Yeah. We had a little get together at Topgolf. Dusty played golf for the first time. Yeah. He swung a golf club. A few times. Did you get the bug? Are you into it now? Are you going to devote your life to this? My wrist was hurting. One of the most natural swings I've ever seen. Really? I mean, it's like Tiger Woods. A lot of line drives out there. I mean, I was able to hit them all. Stingers. Yeah. But no, I couldn't get any height on it. Yeah. Well...
Yeah. If you actually play golf, it's like you don't care about stuff like that. If you're hitting it straight and forward, that's really all you need.
I just feel like that'd be embarrassing if I went out to golf with people and then I'm hitting line drives. Well, just say it's a stinger and they go, oh, he knows something. I don't know. Okay. Yeah. Oh, another stinger, boys. This wind is whipping up. Stinger Saturday, fellas. You know, I think it's like gambling. I think if I had hit it and it really got some air on it, I might have been like, oh, this is fun. But instead...
you know, I lose every time and I'm, I'm thankful to God that I lose. Yeah. So I'm not addicted to gambling. So you're thankful you're, you're not an immediate. I don't blame God that I didn't win the lotto numbers. I'm thankful that I didn't. Uh,
Well, it was fun anyway. It was fun. Yeah. Had a lot of fun out there. And now football season's over and pitchers and catchers report this week. Baseball's back, baby. Got my Nashville sound set on. That's my team. There you go. I love it. Yeah. Well, you're a Braves fan too, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to get into baseball now, Dustin. You got to. I like baseball, but it's a lot of games. It's a lot. It's 162. Yeah. But. You know, we went to a couple of games, maybe one, and I liked it.
We went to an NFL game together that we both did not have a good time. No, but the Milwaukee Brewers game was great. Really great. And you know who we saw at that game was Sonny Gray. Didn't even know him at the time. Friend of the podcast. Okay. He's done the podcast. Oh, okay. Sonny Gray, buddies with Nate. But I didn't know it. Was he on the team? He was on the opposing team. Okay. He was on the Reds at the time. Sonny Gray. That's a tough name. His parents were like, listen, the last name's kind of dreary. So let's just.
We got to brighten it up a little bit. He's really good, though. All right. This weekend, I think you two losers were at home, but I was out there on the road. Friday night, I was in Marion, Illinois at the Little Nashville Cafe with my buddy Alex Valuto. Sold it out. All right. That's awesome. It's a hot show. A lot of Nate Land folks came out.
Good time. Then Saturday, I was in Quentin, Virginia. That's just outside Richmond. Yeah. Is that where the FBI is? No, that's... Quantica. Yeah. Yeah. It's close. Yeah. And for Laugh All Night, the show went from 7 to 8 p.m., and we had a great time. Yeah, you're like, I'm only doing jokes for an hour. You keep laughing. Yeah.
A lot of Nate Land folks came to that. That's great. Brought us some gifts. And yeah. What about Dry Bar people? Do you ever get people that are like, oh, I just come in here from Dry Bar. I didn't even know you had a podcast. I don't think so. Okay. Occasionally somebody will know me from Dry Bar. You ever go to Utah? You ever do shows in Utah? Yeah. And not when you're out there? No, not really. I mean...
More times than not, I don't know if you've experienced, well, you didn't have a Dunner dry bar though. So nevermind. Excuse me. Let alone two. People will say afterwards, like, oh, now I know where I know you from, from your dry bar.
Well, a lot of people come up to me and Brian and go, I saw you on Channel 4.5. Yeah. For Stand Up Nashville. All right. Circle Network. The now defunct Circle Network. It is. That's too bad. I think so. Well, it's too bad. I was on there, too. I didn't know that. Somebody told me it was defunct. I thought it was growing. I thought they were doing great. I mean, that started during the pandemic, I think. They should have utilized us for more stuff. Right.
A cursory Google search shows there's no evidence that the network is defunct. So I want to retract that statement and apologize to all the beautiful people at the Opry Network. They had Clint Black doing some kind of interview podcast style show. And I'm like, I like Clint, but what, you know, let's let one of us do it or interview one of us.
He was hosting it. Yeah. Let's get some spice up in here, you know? I saw Clint Black do stand-up comedy. Did you? Here at Zany's. Oh, okay. I bet it wasn't good, huh? It was a weird show. I met Clint Black, and I like him, but... This was probably... Was it Clint Black or Mark Chestnut? Clint Black. It was Clint White. Somebody told me Mark Chestnut's a big comedy fan. About 15 years ago...
When reality shows were just popping off, there was one where celebrities perform another genre of entertainment than what they do. Okay. Clint Black chose stand-up comedy. So on the show that night, I think TC co-posted it. Then he's like, we got a special guest set. Clint Black comes out.
does his set that he's doing for the show. He gets off stage. We got another special guest set. Jimmy Fallon comes out. This is when he was about to start doing Late Night. He was just trying to get his chops back. Big celebrity at this point. Oh, yeah. I mean, is Clint Black a big enough celebrity that they cared when he came out? In the 90s, for sure. Really? Was there a pop when he came out? Do you remember? Yeah. I mean, I'm sure maybe not everyone there knew who he was, but most people did, I think. My mom used to call him a poor man's George Strait. Okay.
And then later she was like, oh, no, I like Clint Black. And I'm like, well, you said that. Yeah, it was pretty insulting when you said that. Yeah. I like Clint Black. And then Jimmy Fallon kills. And then Brett Ernst was the headliner. And Brett Ernst is great. And he destroyed. Yeah. He didn't have a hard time at all. Yeah. But he wasn't doing a different thing. True. But, I mean, Jimmy Fallon, people were so excited for Jimmy Fallon. Was Jimmy Fallon singing songs?
No, I think he was there unrelated. Oh, this was just a show people doing stand-up. This was just a hot show. I thought Clint Black was doing stand-up. Jimmy Fallon was doing music. No, I'm sorry. Clint Black was on a reality show where he was doing that, but he was at Zany's just practicing. So he just popped in. Yeah, yeah. He popped in. A guest spot. Yeah, he did a guest spot, and then Jimmy Fallon popped in and did a guest spot.
and then Brett Ernst just headlined the show. I don't think Jimmy Fallon's known for his stand-up comedy, though, right? But he was doing it. Very funny, and everybody likes him, but I don't think he's known for his stand-up comedy, right? No, definitely not anymore. Yeah, but he does impressions. He does a lot of songs, and he would have crushed it. He should have came out and did a Clint Black song. Yeah.
Yeah, you should have. Next time when you guys are on there, you can let them know. Nothing but the taillights. When we are trying to make progress, life's curveballs often feel like taking one step forward and two steps back. I hate a curveball. I was never able to hit a curveball. That's when my baseball career ended. Trouble with the curve. Trouble with the curve, dude. Yeah, I read that movie. I thought it was a... About my life? Flat Earth documentary. It's not? No.
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uh so were you guys both on this weekend uh i i will talk more about the last because i see some comments we'll get into the last weekend when i was gone but i was with kathleen madigan this weekend durham north carolina at the carolina theater two hot shows nice that's very fun uh gosh she just has so much new stuff and it's already yeah she just turns it over so quickly she's she's pretty amazing but i'll say this
I've flown six times since I've seen y'all last. I am six for six on nobody next to me on the plane. All right. Six for six. Wow. Pretty unbelievable streak I'm on right now. I think it's a lot of things. I was two for two this weekend. That's a good feeling, right? Yeah. Well, maybe it's because we've had a lot of plane crashes and people are like, I don't think I'm going to fly.
going to fly. The planes were considerably more empty than they usually have been. But even the full flight. I say let's have a couple more and get some space on these planes. I hope everybody's safe. Of course. But let's let them go. I hope a few empty planes crash. Just to scare some people off. But I had a quote. You think that was a plane in Philly though? It looks like a missile. Have you seen the videos? I have seen the video. I haven't dug into it yet. But I'm sure we'll talk off air about it. Laughter
But I had a quote unquote completely full flight with an empty middle seat next to me. Wow. Exit row, middle seat. People doubled up to not sit next to you. Somebody took a lap. It's worth it. And the flight attendants were like, I'll allow it. We've seen the guy. I'll allow it. I get it. In this case, yeah. I'll get you the seatbelt and stender. The pilot's like, you can sit up here with me. Yeah.
Wow. You can't sit in the exit row with a seatbelt extender. Do you know that? I didn't know that. I'm for that, though. I am for it, too. It's not about the seatbelt extender. It's embarrassing if you get moved, though. I've seen it happen. You might sit in the exit row. The guy back there can't get the belt.
He said he can help, but we're concerned he might not be able to do that. He ain't going to be able to help. Yeah. Well, that's what it is, because the seatbelt extender itself does it. You're not losing time in an emergency with that. You just clip it off like a normal seatbelt. Right. But I think if you need one. You won't have time to get the Vaseline in between the armrests to get you out of there. Jeez. Vaseline.
Dusty is brutal today. Anyway, six for six. I was proud. Yeah. And we'll talk more about everything else in a while. But where were you, Dusty? I was at home. Okay. Let me ask you this. Because I've...
All right. I flew Southwest this weekend. Okay. Pretty empty plane going and coming. Yeah. What do you guys think? How far off the order, A, 1 through 30, 60, B, C, that you would have to be at a line before they'll – when you get up there, that they'll stop you? If it's not a full flight, you probably have a –
five or six before they say something. So you can be, I'm guessing you could be 31 and you go at 25 or whatever, and they're not going to say much more than that. They go, Hey, you got it. What do you think? That's, that's my thinking full flight. I think they're going to be a little more serious about it and strict about it. Yeah. But if everybody, if like, yeah, everybody's going to be able to spread out. It's like, who really cares? Yeah. What do you think? I mean, you're probably right. I think you gotta be a letter off.
I mean, that's all I've seen is, sir, this is A group and you're B. But I just wonder if you're A-22 and A-47 sneaks up there, are they going to, sir, got to go back? I've started to be more assertive about it. I told a woman, you got to. She was like A-21 and she was hanging out at A-16 and you got to.
I was talking about Southwest, but you're doing it yourself. Oh, yeah. I go up and I go, look, this is where the game is played in these few spots right here. Because I want the exit row aisle seat. And you can't, like, that's why I'm here, A16. I've heard this. I was there one time. I had A1. And another guy was like, oh, I got A1 too. And he showed me the ticket. And I was like, I don't think so.
But I just was like, I don't know how to argue with this guy about it. And then we get up there and they go, that's the wrong ticket. To you or him? Him. He had the wrong ticket. He had a ticket for a later flight. Oh, and then didn't he just switch over? I think they let him go. Wow. I mean, that's a pretty ingenious move. Oh, yeah. Just go, oh, my bad. And you're actually C-34 or whatever. I didn't care for it. I respect it. Yeah. Well, it's cheating. Yeah, of course it is. But it's.
I mean, it's pretty smart. I would never have thought to do that. Yeah. I'm not as big of a scumbag to think to do that. Yeah. Anyway. You guys want to get in these comments? Let's do it. Let's do it.
You going to do them, Aaron? Oh, I'll do it. Comments come from, as always, Twitter, our ex. Yeah. Instagram, YouTube, Apple Podcast Reviews, and nateland at natebargetze.com. Or if you see Brian on the street, put him in a headlock and let him know.
Or bring a gift to me at a show with a comment inside. Have people done that? I don't know, but I figure I'll put it out there. People bring me gifts and they'll say, I've commented two or three times. You guys haven't read it yet. I'm like, oh, okay. You're like, well, probably because your comments are like this. You could have came at me with a witty kind of thing today. You know what I mean? Yeah. Really go at them. You got to step it up a bit. We get a lot of comments. First comment comes from Joe Gatto.
I believe we accomplished a hot episode. Thanks so much for having me. Wow. I was so jealous Joe was on the podcast and I was going, I'm a giant and practical Joker's fan, dude. It was a fun episode. Joe Gatto. You ever seen him on that show? That guy's a menace. Yeah. It was a fun show. Dusty proclaimed the show hot five minutes in. Okay. And Dusty's like, and I mean, Joe's basically saying we lived up to Dusty's. Yeah. He spoke into existence. Yeah. It was a hot show. He's very funny. Very nice guy. I'd never met him.
Very funny. Very nice. I opened for him once. Really struggled with his audience. Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. But he was great. Next comment from Mrs. Carlin. We got Joe Gatto, George Carlin. It's crazy. I would say I missed Aaron on this episode. Oh, Mrs. Carlin. His wife. His daughter. Okay. I would say I missed Aaron on this episode, but I'm seeing him everywhere these days. Aaron, congrats on the special. It was hilarious. Great episode, y'all. Thank you, Mrs. Carlin.
Special has been doing well. If you haven't watched it yet, Signature Dish. It's on the Nate Land YouTube. If you're watching it on YouTube, just...
flip back a few videos signature dish 30 minutes it's a hot 30 minutes it is a hot 30 minutes you know i shared it and then it really bumped up i appreciate that i got the dusty ball yeah very funny i was pumped with it and a great tonight show thanks dude i think we got a comment about that coming right up we'll get into it i'd love to hear your thoughts jared bartlett how about that joe gatto mrs carlin and president bartlett
Oh, from the West wing. Jared Bartlett as someone who has never seen Aaron's comedy and only seen him on the pod. I was worried, but signature dish was awesome. Very excited to see his full hour special one day when Nate land is its own streaming service. Keep it up. Hope to one day see the whole band right now. I've only seen the B. So the bar is low. Well, that's what I try to, we're all professional comedians here. It's like, uh,
Some people act like we're Nate's sidekicks out here. We're all professional comedians. We're all doing our own stuff. Oh, I was worried that Aaron wouldn't be funny. It's like, Aaron's great. But I love that people are coming in blind and just go, and let's just give it a shot. So that's good. And Nate did produce the special, so...
Thank you so much, Jared. And who's to say that you might not get, you know, maybe you get an hour on Netflix, you know? That's true, but he's also, Jared's wishing that continued success for Nate Land, too. Right, right. Maybe Nate Land will be the next Netflix very soon. Well, that would be nice, but I, you know, I just want Jared to give you your own credit here. Yeah. Thanks, man. Yeah, I mean, I want to call this guy out. Jared.
And the worried, he's probably taking a shot at me on that. He was. His way underlined worried. Okay. Right there. Gabe Allen, congratulations on the Tonight Show, Aaron. Though I'm sorry to say our distance from the sun does not affect the seasons. It is the tilt of the earth on its axis. That's what I was saying. Yeah.
Yeah, that was Dusty's main point for sure. I've been corrected on this and it makes perfect sense. It is what I was saying. It's something I have not thought about ever. And then once somebody says it, you go, oh, that does make a lot of sense. Though I will make a bold claim.
that I think you're going to be a little bit hotter if you're 3 million miles closer to the sun. I'm going to say this. I don't have a lot of science to back that up, but if you're 3 million miles closer to something incredibly hot, I think you're going to be a little warmer.
That's my thoughts. Everyone came after you on this, but I didn't speak up because I forget. Well, because it's not worth it because that's not how any of it works anyway. Now, here's what I think it is. Well, I was just going to say, I learned this in school. It's the example of something I just forget over time. Yeah, because you're not thinking about the tilt of the earth on its axis every day. And over time, your mind purges itself of false information, and you're like, you forget it because you go, that doesn't make sense.
I think my problem is we're all wrong about stuff on this podcast, right? But when I'm wrong about stuff, I really dig in and say it like I'm right. Oh, I know. And I really act confident when I'm really not, which I think I'm trying to do good radio here. That's part of it. I've also got severe character flaws. So maybe just take that into account.
You know what I'm saying? So we all have them. No, just me. Oh yeah. I read some comments one day and a lady was like, uh, my husband knows a lot about space and he heard me listening to this podcast and he goes, what's that? And she goes, don't even listen. It's going to make you dumber. And I just, it's a funny comment.
Much love to her and her husband. Yeah, I love that. I just love when people go, my husband knows a lot about space. And I'm like, well, you read a lot of stuff. You did read a lot of stuff. He hasn't been. Probably not. I mean, I guarantee it. All right. So tonight's show. Awesome. Thank you, man. Great job. It was very fun. You've done a lot of big things. Bridgestone Arena, Opry, other TV stuff. How does this rank as far as nervousness? Um,
So nervous is, you know, they did such a good job preparing you for the set that by the time I did it, I knew what I had to do. And you don't really have time to you're kind of just like, oh, this is happening. So they just like walk you out.
So I did exactly what Dusty recommended, which is I have the picture here. Here's me running my set to an empty room. Yes. An empty Tonight Show set. There's three. I mean, you see a couple of people there sitting and they were very generous laughers. They were giving me some pity laughs as I ran my set. But I'm going to tell you, that's new.
The first time I did it, which was my best set, I would say, of my Tonight Show, the first one, nobody laughed when I did it after. This time I did it, and they were laughing in the audience, and it threw me almost. I was like, whoa, I was not expecting this. Maybe you bombed so bad that first sound check they made it a policy afterwards. Guys, we can't crash their confidence. Put in the laugh track. Yeah. So Michael Cox of The Tonight Show, he was so great about every variable that you can think of.
You walk out, you point at Jimmy Fallon, then they tell you to point at the band. So we practiced doing that to the point where I thought it was overkill. But then by the time I did the real set, I was like, oh, I'm glad. I'm glad we did all that. One funny thing I'll tell you all is he told me it's about a 50-50 chance the crowd is going to stand when you walk out.
And it has nothing to do with you. It's just sometimes if there's the right combination of people in the audience, they will just, for whatever reason, stand when every guest is brought out. So he said, if that's the case, you have to tell them to sit down before you start your first joke or else the first joke is just lost. Right. So I would never even thought to do that. And if you watch the video, I'm sure I walk out there. I go, all right, sit down, sit down, sit down.
So I told Stephen Bargetzi that last night. I told him that story. And he goes, thank God. I thought you were such a hack. I thought you were doing a, oh, please sit down. Like I got a fake standing ovation. That's what I thought too. No, they were standing up.
I mean, they got, they looked like I really, they knew who I was, but they didn't. Yeah. They were just, they stood up for Adrian Brody. They stood up for Adina Menzel and then me. So it's just a funny, I would never have thought it would come across that way. Well, I didn't think that, but because they, the last time I was there, they stood for me too. But you didn't say it. No, I just, but I always take a little bit of time to get going. Yeah. So. All right. Yeah. So it's not gonna, they'll be sat down. Yeah.
But I let him know, come on, come on. And you also got an energy that you can say, sit down, and it doesn't come across. If I come out and go, sit down, sit down. That guy's going to need Vaseline. Can you even get in your chair? Yeah.
I would never do that. Start heckling them. I don't know why I'm even making these jokes with you. It just seems fun to do. It is fun, but it was a, you know, a very cool experience. It felt like, I don't know. There's me and Jimmy Fallon talking before the show. He comes around. You have like 30 seconds to talk to him in your, in your dressing room. That's a weird conversation.
because other people are watching you talk to Jimmy Fallon. Well, there's a whole camera crew. I mean, look, there's a photographer took this picture. So there's a whole crew behind him. And they were like, we just kind of pick one thing you want to, you talk to him, you can say Nate or talk to him about Zanies. And I was like, I think we're all a little sick of talking about Nate. Yeah. You know what I mean? That guy's enough press. Yeah. So we talked about Zanies for a minute and he told a funny Zanies story about
About Clint Black? No, not the Clint Black story, but about something else. But Lucy was there, too. So I said, this is my wife. She works at Zany's. And then that got him into the Zany story. But just very nice guy. After the set, I went over and sat on the couch with him.
and it looks like we're chopping it up right here but this is like this is a snap i was there for like five seconds and i i i think i'm saying everybody here has been so great thank you so much yeah but it looks like i'm going here's how you're laying it down here's how comedy works jimmy fallon but he watched my set he had really nice things to say he went through like every joke
during the commercial break he was like that joke did he's like that so it was just really cool man and uh a good experience cool thing to do i felt like the biggest thing i've done like people hitting me up like from high school and stuff i've had stuff that uh probably means more to my career like objectively like like jfl something like that or like getting an agent
But this is something people understand. Yeah, they all recognize it. That's, yeah, I mean, the first time that I did it, it was like huge for text messages and people reaching out and people I haven't talked to in a long time. Oh, yeah. Now it's like nobody almost. My mom didn't even know I was on it. Really? Yeah. Well, that may be on you, Dusty. I don't think your mom is required to check the TV listings. She should keep up with what I got.
going on. Yeah, I texted you. Congrats. Great job. Never heard from you. I'm sorry. I was getting blown up. And I knew I'd see you. Yeah. No, I texted you during the podcast.
Remember? Yeah, but I hadn't seen it yet. I texted you once I watched it. I texted you right after I got off stage, basically. One of the first people who texted you. I was thinking about you my whole set, Brian. I could kind of tell. I could kind of tell. Sit down. And I want to thank Christy Johnson at Purpose Boutique for sending me those clothes, sending me those shoes. Yeah, you look good. It was a sharp look. I was really pulling up old photos of you the other day. I mean, you've completely transformed.
Yeah, some of those old pictures are tough to look at. But it was awesome. Thank you to everybody. I got a lot of nice messages from people and stuff. So it was really cool. And the Comedy Cellar was great? The Comedy Cellar was... I was more nervous about that, honestly. That set.
Because Comedy Cellar is an iconic, legendary club in New York, and I've never gone up there. And then when you do this night show, they kind of parade you around and let you hop up on all the shows. And I got to do them. Yeah, that's fun. It was really cool. I like that, too. It was really cool. That's awesome. And yeah, it was awesome. Thank you, everybody. All right. Yeah. Good stuff. Great question, Gabe. Yeah. Thank you, Gabe. Robert J.,
We're back to the comments. Gabe didn't even have a question, Dusty, but go ahead. Yeah, Gabe was actually just correcting my science. Robert J., you guys are so clueless, it's hilarious. All right, let's move on. You guys are so clueless, it's hilarious. Breakfast said gravity is because of magnetism in the Earth.
No, it's because of math. All right. Yeah. Last week, Nate, for the third straight week, did his whole ball in the water thing, which I don't really even understand what he's saying. I don't really know what he's saying either. But I was just trying to say, and I even said right after I said it, magnetism is probably not the right word. But you're so clueless, it's hilarious. Yeah. I'm doing it for Robert. You're so clueless, it's hilarious. Dr. Robert J. writing in.
I was just trying to make Nate understand gravity is not a gas that leaks in. It's a force. And I said magnetism, which is not the right word, but it made it worse when he said, oh, so it's like two magnets that push off. I'm like, oh, boy. It doesn't exist, so it doesn't matter. It's holding the universe together. But it's tough to explain gravity to a guy when there's a picture of him dressed as George Washington right behind him. You know what I mean? The reality is no one can explain it.
Plenty of people can't explain it. Not four idiots on a comedy podcast. No one can. I mean, I've heard it explained. Scientists have explained it. It appealed to you. They've detected gravitational waves. I've seen it. They detected them. There's nothing they can say. Yeah, they detected them. There's nothing they can say that could convince you. I'll agree with that. Uh-huh. They can't...
There's no, I mean, you can go to great lengths to make explanations and be like, but you can't, no one can explain. Tell you what, if you drop a bottle of water and it goes up in the sky, give me a call. Let me know. Well, if the bottle of water is lighter than the air around it, then it will rise. Why? Because it's lighter than the air around it. But why would that mean it would go up? Well, because the air around it would be heavier.
But why would the heavy thing go down? Well, that's just the way it works. The heavy thing. It's just the way. Well, Dusty, you just proved gravity. No. Gravity is not real, but sometimes a bigger thing will make a smaller thing come towards you. So it's all about weight? It's not about weight. It's about mass. But a balloon or a butterfly.
But what about a balloon or a butterfly? Well, they have, you know, they have surface area. And if a butterfly stops flapping its wings, it falls to the ground. So its wings are so strong that it defies gravity.
No, that's not how defying gravity works. I mean, there's air resistance. But it holds me to the earth. Flight is amazing. I'm not saying that. I'm not acting like it's super. But like a balloon, you know, the helium is lighter than the air around it. So it floats. Okay. I mean, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. All right.
Yeah. I thought I saw a UFO on a plane the other day. Did you really? It was just a balloon zipping by. I'm just saying no one can explain it. That's the point. I think people can explain it. I didn't really understand it until you explained it. Well, but a helium in a balloon, it just floats right away. I mean, nothing's pulling it down, but if you put...
you know, just oxygen in a balloon, it falls. The balloon itself weighs the same, right? Mm-hmm. But the helium makes it lighter, so it floats. Right. Yeah. Every week, so many people write in trying to explain it to us. And I would just encourage this. Well, listen. Don't, because we're not going to read it. If you go, you guys are so clueless, it's hilarious, and they're going to lump us all in. Yeah, it should just be me. Yeah. I mean...
I mean, Robert J. is pulling you guys into this, but yet you guys still want to be on Robert J.'s side. No, Robert J. and I are not on the same team. You guys want to convince Robert J. You're like, Robert J., we're buddies. Let us be buddies with you. I want Robert J. to know I don't care. He's the only one who's called me hilarious on this podcast. We're going to jump into the next comment. Brett Bacon, great name.
What does Dusty think about the announcement that NASA is doing a Twitch live stream from the International Space Station this Wednesday? I can't wait. I mean, I think that's going to be something.
Someone sent us a video today of one of the astronauts with a baseball glove, a baseball, and he would throw the ball, not hard, but get it going, and then he would zip past it and catch it himself. Oh, that's cool. Amazing. Yeah. How do you think he's doing that? I don't know, but he's not floating in the air, though. CGI. CGI.
I mean, there's a lot of things, but yeah, I mean, there's so much they can do with video by the time it gets to us. I mean, it's like, it's truly amazing what they can do with video now. I mean, the movie Gravity with Sandra Bullock and George Clooney is really amazing. It's an amazing movie. It's a real thing?
I'm it's a real movie and that's what I'm saying. They make it look so real. Yeah. The next comment comes from Jordan Gibbs, Jordan Gibbs. Now that dusty is into, do you skip that one on purpose? Oh, I did not mean to skip that one. I'm sorry. Corey Crowley, Brett Bacon and Corey Crowley. I don't know if any of these people are real, but I like the names. Corey Crowley. I'm curious if the guys have any funny stories about open micers when they were around them earlier in their career.
I'm still around him. I was going to say, I mean, I might be going to open mic this week. I don't understand this question about just open micers in general, or is he saying somebody you knew as an open micer that's now gone on to do big things? I think he may have tried an open mic and some crazy people there doing some crazy things. Some crazy stuff. Oh, yeah. Open mic is an insane place. I brought my brother-in-law one time.
who's a pretty religious guy. And he went to an open mic in East Nashville with me, Cult Fiction Underground. He was just in town doing some work and he thought, I'll go to the open mic with you.
And, you know, religious, but also, you know, he's been around a little bit. He's heard it all before. And he left that open mic, like, distraught a little bit. About what? Just the content. Yeah. The things people said. Yeah. The things that come out of people's mouths at an open mic. It is so wild. Yeah. But you got to let people try. Yeah. You got to let people try. It's a fun place to be, an open mic.
And I think if somebody, I think when, if the joke bombs, then that's all, that's all the punishment. He was disturbed, not by the bad comedy, but what they're actually saying. Oh yeah. Their lives. But if the comedy would have been better, he would have been less distraught. That's true. That is very true. I mean, just a lot. I mean, that was a very small room. I love that room. That's one of my favorite rooms. It's gone now, but yeah,
You remember it. Oh, yeah. You did a special there. Yeah. Well, my making that Fudge album I recorded there. But it was so great. But it would get wild in there because you're just in a little box. Yeah. And gosh, you couldn't escape it. Yeah. I mean, I still got to open mics when I can. And we've gone to the three of us have gone to thousands of them. So it's yeah, we got a lot of stuff. I met Dusty in open mic.
At the Bobby's Idle Hour. I probably met you at an open mic. I can't remember where specifically. Yeah. I met Brian at Zany's. Oh. Yeah. Keith Alberstadt. That's right. Big time. And I'd already heard about you from my friend Lori Hinkle. Oh, yeah. Went to... Kind of went to high school with Lori Hinkle. She went to a different school, but same town. You know how...
I've had this numerous times. People say, oh, you do comedy? I got a buddy who's trying, you know, and it's never anyone that you've either heard of or they're ever going to be good. She's like, I got a friend from school. His name's Dusty Slay. Dusty Slay. I can already tell by that name. He's not funny. You can't have a stage name, buddy. That sounds crazy. That's hot. And then you see him and you go, oh, that's your real name for sure. Yeah. It was fun. Yeah. Me, you, Chad Ryden on the Keith Albertson show. Yep.
Yeah, I remember that. It was a hot show. This episode of Nate Land is sponsored by BetterHelp. What are some of your relationship green flags? We often hear about the red flags we should avoid, but why don't we focus more on looking for green flags in friends and partners? A green flag would be if they use BetterHelp. That's a great point, Aaron. If you're not sure what they look like, therapy can help you identify green flags, actively practice them in your relationships, and embody this green flag energy yourself.
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Discover your relationship green flags with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Nate to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Nate. Jordan Gibbs, next comment. Now that Dusty is into classical music, can we please get a Dusty Slay's top five classical music song segment? By the way, I totally recommend listening to Finnish composer Jean Sibelius.
It's outstanding. I will look this up. The thing about classical music is, like, country music, I've been listening to it my whole life, right? So it's like I know so many songs. And plus, and they're all narrowed down to a name and an artist. It's like there's so many classical music artists, and the songs are always like,
uh, you know, Sonata 86 in concerto number four or whatever. And you're like a minor D flat. And it's like, uh, it's hard to even remember what song you'd listened to before, but you recognize them when you hear them. Yeah. You should do dusty slays. Top five classic drinking songs, classical drinking songs, classical music to drink to, uh,
No, about drinking. Oh, country music songs. No, classical. I don't know. There's no words, though. So it's hard for that to be. That was the joke. I'll go back to the open mic.
I was trying to be funny. Am I the only one missing? I mean, it seems like everybody. The joke was that. Yeah. I mean, Robert Jay is the only one who thinks I'm hilarious. I know. He probably took that back just now. He's like, maybe it is magnetism. I don't know. Amadeus. You ever see the movie Amadeus? No, but I am familiar. Unbelievable movie. And the soundtrack. I mean, it's about Mozart. Mozart. Mozart.
somebody pointed out I say his name wrong but Requiem he wrote the soundtrack for his own funeral when he was alive and it's unbelievable so that's a fun listen if you go listen Mozart's I once recommended that album Mozart's Requiem yeah yeah it's awesome someone said I say it Mozart
That's how I just said it now, and I had to correct myself. It's Mozart. But you're putting a T. Yeah, you kind of put a little. But before that T, you were saying it the way you used it. I was saying Mozart. Yeah, but you're still saying Mozart. They're saying I was saying Mozart. Mozart. Yeah. Mozart. Yeah. All right. Amadeus. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Yeah. What a name. Chris Berry.
What has doing shows at college campuses been like for you all? I've only done a handful, so I'm going to defer to these other two guys. Well, I've only done a handful, too, but they've all been great. I love them. I have a good time. Those University of Kentucky shows were great? Well...
The gigs that I've actually been booked on by my agent to go perform at a college have all been really good. The old Tom Sobel gigs at the University of Kentucky are some of the worst gigs. They are really bad. But I just...
I think it's different. I think he got some kind of contract to just do weekly shows at the University of Kentucky. So nobody cared about that. But when you, you know, I feel like when you actually get booked by a college to go, I feel like it's a bit of a special event. Still a ton of people don't come. I was with Fortune Feimster, actually, opening for her. I did a run of theaters with her. And these were sold-out theaters, like people paying lots of money to come see her. But we started the run...
by doing a college in New Orleans. What is that college? There's a few Tulane. Tulane. Yeah. And free, free show. Yeah. Barely anyone shows up. And it's like, she's selling out theaters.
But then this free show at a college, barely anyone shows up. Dude, I think about that, but I didn't go to a single thing in college. I didn't even know that stuff was happening. Yeah, and I think that's what's happening. Yeah, I think a lot of comics I know now did shows while I was there on campus that I never knew about. So it's just stuff gets lost in the fray. But I've really only had good experiences with colleges. Even during COVID, I did some Zoom college shows that were fun.
I think what you've probably heard is famous comedians talking about, you can't say anything on college campuses anymore, the environment's too PC, all that, which maybe it is, but I don't think any of us up here are that kind of comic, so we can just do our act and everything's fine. And I don't talk about gravity when I'm doing comedy. Right. He saves that for the meet and greet after the show. Yeah, it's more of a fun conversational thing. I've only done colleges a couple times at my age.
They don't want to see me. I'm their parents age. Did you do? Well, you know what I said? I said to some college, I said, listen, I don't know if you guys are going to find this funny, but I just want you to know your dads think it's hilarious. That's pretty good. Yeah, that's a good line. I'm too old for him. I mean, I'm yeah, I say I do comedy for a lot of old people. That's what I say.
I mean, I was like, if I could do a college now, I'm a, I was a freshman in high school and these kids were born. Yeah. When I was just two or three years in is when Angela Johnson was blowing up with fun, quick, we, and all that. And she did MTSU did a back to school free show. Like you're saying at the Murphy center there where they play basketball and I opened for, and up until Bridgestone arena, that was the biggest crowd I'd ever done. It was like 5,000 people. Yeah. That's a big crowd. How'd it go?
Not great. I mean, it's just so chaotic. People just, you know, it's really hard. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Next comment comes from Ben Blykamp. That's too many L's. Yeah. You need a vowel in the middle there. You want to llama it. You know what I mean? Blykamp.
Like Blykemp. Yeah, but there's two L's. Yeah. So Ben B. It seemed that Aaron had a lot more energy on stage than in his older clips from years ago. Is this something he actively worked on or does it come with experience and confidence? Do you get feedback from other comics? I remember Bill Burr mentioned on a podcast he consciously tried to include more physical acting or comedy in one of his specials. I was on drugs. Yeah.
Thank you, Ben. All right. Um, no, I don't know. I guess now we've all like, it was, I didn't go in and go, I have made a conscious decision to like have more energy. There are small things that I think about and have tried to fix, but I think in general, you just kind of evolve and, uh,
And I don't know. Maybe I am more energetic than I was years ago. I don't know. It's not something I set out to do. I think it's happened to me too. Not as extreme. But you probably were never as low energy as I used to be. Even your first album is so different than you are now. But the comedy I do now, I'm much more energetic. And I don't know if it's confidence, but you just...
I don't know. You just do it so many times that you just feel like, all right, I feel more natural out here. I don't feel like I'm really performing as much as I am. Just I'm natural out here now. We've all done. I mean, Nate is even Nate. He was still low energy. But when he first started, he was even...
More low energy. Same for me. When I first started, I wanted to have like a Stephen Wright type of vibe. Me too. Mitch Hedberg was who I was going for. I wasn't trying to do those type of jokes, but that energy is what I was doing. And then over time, I just gradually... Like the mysterious kind of downtrodden, but I'm just trying to... I mean, you should do a set like that one of these nights. Just like...
There's big jacket on kind of looking down at the ground. I mean, that was my first five years in comedy. As far as booking down with no confidence. I like to think I was doing a combination of Mitch Hedberg and Ron White. That's what I like to think when I started comedy. Yeah. Like I was like always drinking on stage, but doing slow jokes like Mitch Hedberg. I wanted to do kind of one liner jokes and,
that's what I thought I was doing. That's who I thought I was. And I think I did pretty, I think I was pulling it off, but with the overalls. No, no, this was after the, the overalls, you're wearing shoes. The overalls was a forgotten period in comedy for me. And, uh, it's, uh, it was a, it's a real learning curve for me. I had a lot of learning curves in life. Hmm.
Next comment comes from Divalidioti. A classical music composer. Divalidioti, concerto number two. You guys always talk about how good a club is when you talk about your weekends. What makes a club good for a comedian? Also, do you think a clean club that doesn't serve alcohol could work? To answer your second question, no. Yeah, there was one for a while. Gutty's.
I think it could work, but it's really hard. And this is why it's really hard because you're not going to find that many clean comics that – because once the clean comics get very good, then they want to make money. And so if you're not serving alcohol, then you're not – you're giving all the ticket sales to the comic, so you're not making any money. You need the alcohol to make the – to fund the club.
You need alcohol and food to fund the club. That's why I think, you know, I don't know if we're allowed to just mention them by name, but that's why, that's what I think happened to gutties. I mean, they wanted to be, they wanted to be like, we can do this without selling alcohol, but you can't pay people enough. Like, it's like, if I can go make more money at a different club, then I'm going to do that. Mm-hmm.
And, you know, they couldn't afford it because, you know, you need the alcohol sales. It's tough. I mean, we've also seen plenty of regular clubs close. Yes. In our time, too. So I think it's just a hard business in general to keep going. The breakdown's different for every club, I think. But what people need to understand is these are largely clubs
They're essentially bars and restaurants that allow us to do stand up. Yeah. So that's how they're making their money. That's how they're keeping the lights on. That's how they're paying the staff. So once you remove that from it, I mean, even these clubs that we know of them that don't serve food, it's a guy. I don't know how they, if it's just alcohol. Yeah.
And the first question here, I think what makes a good club is if you sell tickets. Well, that does make a big part of it. Yeah. But I think it's does the club care about the comics? Right. Because you can go there. I've been to some clubs where I wasn't selling tickets, and there's definitely some that I think are bad, and there's others that I think are good. When you're selling out, they're all good.
but it's like, I remember I was doing a club one time early on. I definitely was not selling out and the microphone was not loud. I could tell by the first comic that it wasn't loud. So I went to the club owner and I go, Hey, do you mind, you know, turning the mic up? Cause it's not, it's barely on. She goes, you know, I'll get to it. And then as a show goes on, I see that it's like, she's not doing it. And we're about to get
to me going on stage and at that time I was definitely reliant on the microphone right as it you know it's fair to be yeah relying on a microphone as a we all are but it's like at that time I especially was right and I could and I go back to her and I go hey you know I'm about to go up and the mic's still not turned up and she's like I've been doing this for 20 years and it's just like
Yeah, okay. I don't care how long you've been doing it. Yeah. I'm not trying to tell you how to run the club. I'm just asking you, will you turn the microphone up? So we just went to the soundboard and figured it out, and we turned it up. While the comics on stage start messing with the levels. Yeah, we just turned it up. Uh-huh.
There's another guy at a club. He yelled at me in the middle of the showroom because he had like 10 comics on stage before me. And I just went to him and I go, hey, do you mind us not doing so many comics before I get up on stage? He goes, yelling at me, you're not going to tell me how to run my club. And I'm like, I just want the show to be good. That's all. You're paying me to come here. I just want the show to be good.
Yeah, I've talked about this with y'all, but sometimes there's a philosophical misunderstanding at a club where you show up and they act like it's their show that they're letting you do. Yeah. And then good clubs, you show up and they go, oh, this is your show. How would you like it to be run? Yeah. That's the main difference. So that example you just talked about, that's like –
that's their show that they're letting you do. Yeah. So they're like, why would this guy ask about how many comics are on it? Right. He's, he's doing our show. Yeah. That's not really how it works. That's the good clubs. We'll do basically whatever you want for the show. Yeah. And, and that's the difference. And then it's like,
you know, I never will say I'll never go back to that club, but I will actively try. You'll never go back to that club. That's for sure. But I will actively try to never go back to the clubs that don't treat me right. Right. And it's just like, just being nice to me, you know, doing small things. The little things, dude. I think when I did Cleveland,
I sold no tickets to hilarities. Yeah. But I showed up and they had made a little sign on the green room door. And I was like, oh, that stuff means it seems so stupid and insignificant. But you do so many clubs where they don't there. They almost seem annoyed that you're there. Yeah. When you do have a place that is at least acting like they're excited to have you that that's that's all the difference.
Well, Hilarities is a great club and that's why, because the people that work there really care about you. And when they care about you, they also care about the audience. They also care about their club. And so people come there and it's a fun experience. The same way for Zany's. I mean, Zany's from the, from the time, the very first time I did comedy here.
Everyone was so nice to me. With me. Yeah, yeah. Well, actually, my first time, I opened for Pablo Francisco here. Oh, okay. Shortly before the time. Little tortilla boy. In...
Everyone was so nice to me. The club, this club has always been nice to me and it's continued to be nice to me. And it's like, it's like I did a club. I actually did. I don't know if I want to say the club, but I did a club and I had, we booked this deal long ago and I agreed to a certain amount and there was no bonuses in the deal. Sometimes when you go to a club for your first time around, there's no bonuses in the deal. Right. So, but,
But I go there and I sell out five shelves. So the money that I'm to receive is much lower than what it would have been had these
percentage deal's been put into place. Right. But this club, knowing that they didn't have to do it, did it anyway and just went ahead and paid me as if we had, they go, you sold out five shows. We're going to. We'll make it right. And it was like, it was unbelievable. Yeah. And you'll remember that forever. Yeah. You don't want to mention that club? Well, I don't know. I don't, I don't want somebody to be like, oh, I can't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't. All right. Yeah. Yeah.
But yeah, and we're very lucky to have a great club here in Nashville. And they care about the local comics. They're always trying to help. They do a class here. They're always trying to help comics get to the next level. So whenever people really locally begrudge this club, I'm always like,
They want you to succeed. They want to help you. If you just show up and do well, they want to help you. Well, you don't have to do well. Show up and be nice and respectful, and they'll help you get better. They want to help you. Anybody who acts like they're not allowed here at this club or whatever, for whatever reason, it's like,
Just show up and be nice. And, uh, you know, and it's like, but doing well is important. Like I used to do back in the day, I would do like Chad riding and friends and they would not, they would be small shows. They wouldn't be sold very well, you know? And, but I was like, uh, I was thankful to be on the show and I'm like, I want to do well.
So I'm not going to phone it in because there's only a few people in the audience. Yeah. I want to go out and crush. So I'm doing my best jokes because I'm like, I want the club to see me do well. Yeah. You know? Yeah, right. I never phoned it in. Now, I'm at a place now where I'm doing new material Monday. I might be like, I'm working on these jokes. Yeah, yeah. And if they bomb, they bomb. But that's what this is. I don't care if I kill tonight. Yeah. Yeah. But I'm trying this, you know, I'm trying this material out. Yeah. Who was the baseball player?
One of the greats. I can't remember. Cal Ripken. Was it Cal Ripken that said that? Well, there was one where, why do you always...
hustle and run blah blah blah nate always talks about this i can't remember who he does yeah he's told me that before they go it's somebody's first time seeing me today yeah yeah yeah i can't remember which there's some kid in the stands it's first time seeing me with cal ripken wrote about him one of in his biography that he he got thrown out of a game once which is pretty unlike him we got thrown out of the game and some kid wrote him and said this was my
I've been wanting to see you my whole childhood. And then I showed up in the one game I'm at. You got thrown out. And he's like, oh, he thinks about that now. Like, it could be somebody. You should write that kid back and say, yeah, you got lucky. No. Yeah. You got to see a real experience. A rare thing. As an adult, I'd love to see my favorite player get thrown out of a game. Yeah. That'd be the best. Yeah. Last comment comes from Aaron Friedrich. Another classical composer. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
I've noticed y'all have talked about texting each other on multiple occasions. It kind of sounds like maybe y'all have a group chat going. If so, what do I need to do to join? I have an iPhone, so I will keep the thread blue, baby. That's very considerate of you, Aaron. We all have...
A group thread without one of us. Yeah, that's for sure. So we have one with. Multiple threads. I'd say the most active is the one between the three of us right here on the, at the table. There was one. It's just like you would think we were debating a, an entertainer who had a questionable past recently and Dusty was
was like, it was the 70s. Times were different then. And you're like, yeah, but that doesn't give him a leeway to blah, blah, blah. And then Dusty said...
King David. He starts mentioning Old Testament characters compared to the 1970s. He's like, they did it. It was just such a funny argument. It's honestly a more high-level debate than what happens on the podcast. Yeah. We'll get into it. I feel restrained a little on the podcast. Chime in with your thoughts. Sorry, Aaron. Thank you to everybody who wrote in. Write in next week.
I'm sure they will about gravity.
I just don't know when people will, you know, they just got to get it that that's where I'm at with it. And that's where you're at with it. And that's where you're at with it. You think it's magnetism. You think the earth is way farther away than it is. I don't think, I don't even think there's space exists. It's like, yeah, we're all different places. They're all equally not insane things to think. Yeah. Our next sponsor, you know, we love delete me. It's our old pal.
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The only way to get 20% off is to go to join, delete me.com slash Nate and enter code Nate at checkout. That's joined, delete me.com slash Nate code Nate. All right. This week, guys, we're talking about game shows. All right. Which we've done before, but not with dusty. Yeah, we did it about three and a half years ago.
Should we call this Game Shows Part 2? Or how far can you go? It's very funny to put a Part 2 three years later. I think we should do Part 2. When I don't remember anything of Part 1. Yeah, we'll try to get some views on Part 1. Can we do Game Shows Continued? But movies, after a while, it's more like a reboot than a...
Part two. I'm going to do a lot of the same facts that I did three and a half years ago. Game shows rebooted. Maybe something like that. Yeah. Let them know. I like that. Game shows, the rebrand. There you go. 2.0. Yeah. So that was when it was me, you, and Nate. When it was fun. But.
It was just light kind of goofy stuff. It was. It was a different time. You got to spice it up. We made our decision. We have to live with it. I don't think we said the word demon until 120 episodes in. You guys were messing out. You realized that it was the chunk that was messing. That's right. There's some people who are still against it. I mean, once in a while, I'll see people going, I just can't get used to Dusty. And I'm like, well. Well, you've been around for more than half of it. Yeah. Come on, guys.
All right, so I asked this last time. I'm going to ask it again. Your favorite game show host? Steve Harvey.
Steve Harvey would be your favorite. Yeah. Steve Harvey is the best host of any, any reality show game show. He's unbelievable. I mean, I hate to just agree, but Steve Harvey is so funny. And then family feud is a show I've always watched. I've always loved family feud. And for a long time, it felt like it didn't matter what rerun you were seeing, what host it was, uh,
But now it's like, and no offense to Al Borland, but I don't want to see a family feud with Richard Karn. It's Steve Harvey or nobody else. Al from Home Improvement, that dude? Yeah, did I say Al Borland? Yeah. I don't remember his name. That's Home Improvement. Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. Him and then the guy from Seinfeld. Yeah, John O'Hurley. Yeah, yeah. It's like...
I mean, I love those guys. Yeah. They're very funny. But Steve Harvey came in, made the show his. It's nobody else now. Yeah. It's so good. If you watch Family Feud, there's probably 40 seconds of gameplay in the entire half hour. Yeah. The rest of it is him just riffing. Yeah. And he's just so good at it. I mean, if you haven't watched it in a while, just YouTube Family Feud.
Steve Harvey compilation. There's a million funny videos of he's just, he's the best. I used to watch it all the time. You know, it's like similar, but in the reverse, like the price is right. I mean, Bob Barker is superior to Drew Carey. Drew Carey is watchable, but Bob Barker's far superior. Yeah. That show was. Bob Barker was very funny. Yeah. He was funny. And then by the end, it was kind of funny how kind of checked out or like,
It seemed like he was kind of over everything, and that was funny too. Yeah, but he was – yeah, I would be nervous on Family Feud because if I say something stupid, Steve Harvey is going to make fun of me. Even if you don't, you might not even say anything stupid. Yeah, for sure. So, Dusty, you have appeared on a couple of game shows.
Yeah, I've been on Nashville Squares, which aired on CMT. I emailed you some links, by the way. Okay, I'm pulling them up. How many years ago? This was, I don't know, 2019, maybe? I don't know if it was that long ago, but I got to say it was before COVID. Okay, so it was at least 2019 then. Yeah. Could have been older. Could have been early 2020. Yeah.
very early. Cause I did do some stuff very early in that year. Um,
This video is restricted on the Zanies Network. What have you been up to? Who knows? Your YouTube account is blocked on the Zanies Wi-Fi. Well, I don't know. My YouTube doesn't get too wild. I know, but I think it knows. Yeah. Well, I got a video on my YouTube where I break down my time on Nashville Squares. And I explain what happened because, you know, I was on this show and then...
I had some good jokes, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Nashville Squares filmed in LA, first off. And then you have the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders. Right. Which is from Texas. A Nashville staple. Yeah. And then you have Gary Busey on there. Yeah.
our mayor hosted by Bob Saget hosted by Bob Saget. But I said nothing. And when they entered introed me, I go, nothing makes me think of Nashville, like Gary Busey and the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders. It got a good laugh from the audience. It was fun. They cut that. Of course. And then, uh, there was another time I made a joke. I forget what it was, but it got cut. And then there was a little banter in between me and Bob Saget, Bob Saget,
Like my, on the show, I just had the answer. So they go, they asked me the question and I, you know, the idea is that I don't have the answer. I'm just guessing, but I, I reveal the answer. And, and Bob Saget's like, no, I don't, I don't think so. Or whatever. And I go,
No, and I'm trying to not reveal how the game works, but I go, no, I'm pretty sure that's it here. And then we had like a little back and forth and then to the point where he was laughing, we were having a good time to the point that they had to actually kind of step in and be like, no, this is the answer. And then he said to me that I was very funny. And then that was all cut.
So when you watch the video, it's just him asking me, and then I just give the answer, and then we move on. Wow. So they cut all my funny moments. So it looked like, and they just were, I don't know. I felt like they were highlighting other people, and some had funny moments. But overall, the show was very cheesy, and they really messed up. Who won the episode you were on? On that National Squares, I had, I think, the contestant's win.
So we don't win. But I did have one of the winning keys or whatever. And the contestant, because I watched this video, was Mickey... Guyton? Guyton. Was she a big deal then?
I don't think so. I knew about her, but I don't think she was. You know her? Country singer? You know, one of my best friends, Greg Rausch, who played guitar at my wedding, played guitar for her and toured with her all over the country. So I know her from that. And she has a few songs that I know. She's very talented. And she was on that episode with Dustin. She was the contestant. She was one of the contestants. And then there was another guy that I don't know who that was.
But, um, yeah. And then Marie Osmond was the center square and, uh, Marie Osmond was being a little flirty with me. I mean, she could be in her seventies, but she was still very attractive. Dina Carter was there. I called her, I told her I had a crush on her when I was a kid, but I called her, uh, Deanne Carter. So it's tough to be like, I had a crush on you, but also I don't know how to say your name. Um, yeah.
John Reap, our friend, was on it. Bill Engvall. Sarah Tiana was on it and also one of the writers. And the lady who plays Reba's husband's wife in the Reba show. You know what I'm talking about? No. The blonde lady, real goofy. Okay.
I'm sure if I saw her, I'd probably... The TV show Reba, the original. Yeah. She gets divorced from her husband. Her husband remarries and marries that lady. Melissa Peterman. Melissa Peterman. And then there was another guy, Carson... Wentz? No. Daly? Carson... Johnny? Carson? I don't know. Beck? Beck?
Nah, I can't remember his name. He was very funny and nice. And then Gary Busey. Okay. And that was our whole lineup. And it was fun, you know, just kind of hanging. But it was like, it was pretty obvious that the show wasn't going to
So you guys all have the answers, and it's up to you to make it funny? Yeah, and then you try to riff a little bit. You give an answer, and then the contestant has to decide whether you're giving the right answer or not. Okay. So they'll ask me, and I go, oh, I think it's this. And then they have to go, does he know, or does he not know?
You know, and I don't think you have to give the right answer. I don't know. I don't remember. Even though I just that's how Hollywood Squares works, too, which I've just done two episodes. Yeah. The reason I picked it this week is I think your episode airs tonight. All right. That's fun. Yeah. Check that out. CBS. All right. It's going to be great. Here we go with that.
I was on, well, I did two episodes. So Drew Barrymore was the center square. Okay. And, uh, and Justin Long was, uh, next to her who they dated for a while, apparently. And, uh, so they had, you know, that, but I, Justin was very fun. They were actually both very nice and fun. Justin Long's great. Yeah. And everything I've seen him in. Uh. Dodgeball. Yeah. Um, uh. Tiffany Haddish. Tiffany Haddish was on, uh, one, if not both of my episodes. Uh,
uh was she ready uh she was ready she it was i don't know what they'll show but uh jay farrow and her had a real back and forth for a minute in a goofy way in a i don't know kind of started in a goofy way and then they elevated to where i'm like i don't know how much of that they'll show yeah uh and uh let's see who um tyra banks oh man star studying yeah some good squares yeah um
Kevin Nealon was there. Friend of the podcast. Yeah. And other people, but it's been a while. I did this, I don't know, six, seven months ago. So you'll be watching it for the first time too. And it'll be interesting to see. I mean, I don't know how... Hosted by Nate Burleson. Yes. Who was very nice and funny. He's not a comic, but he's a very funny guy. I'm very uncomfortable on those shows. Why? Because...
My whole style of comedy is not to jump in. Uh-huh. Right? Like, I try to jump in here and I get comments of people saying I interrupt. Yeah. Right? I'm just trying to jump in. Yeah. But I'm not. Trying to chime in. Yeah. So, I'm not, that's not my style. That's why I like stand-up. I just get to do it by myself. You're not interrupting anybody. Right. Yeah.
right in fact if i am they shouldn't be talking that's right and so i'm just and then i'm also on there with like movie stars and you know and like one of my jokes kind of was like this the contestants they'll call on you they'll go they'll go oh next the beautiful tyra banks or they'll go you know the very funny justin long and then the guy was like uh
Well, I just watched his special, so dusty slay. And I go, oh, okay. I like how you gave everybody else a compliment. Yeah. And that's fun. That'll be cut. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Exactly. So they'll cut all my jokes. Yeah. But it was really fun. And then I've also, I did a show on it. There was a network called Quibi that was going to be put out just on phones. Mm-hmm.
And then COVID happened. And I think it, I don't know if that was a good idea anyway, but COVID killed it. Yeah. I think they were looking for people on New York subways to be watching this on their phones on the way to work. I think that was their real plan. But I had a show called Nice Ones hosted by, this was so long ago. But anyway, it was a roast show, but it was a compliment battle.
So it was like three of us on there were all trying to out-compliment each other. Was this the Ron Funches show? Ron Funches, yeah. Yeah. And I won. All right. I won that. Is that online? It may be. At least a clip of it from my channel is on there. Yeah. Huh. And then I did After Midnight. Yeah. I mean, I thought about mentioning that. It's almost like, I don't even think of that as a game show. Well, I guess it is. You are competing. And I won.
So it's worth mentioning. Yeah. I guess Sarah Tiana, Sarah Tiana. Yep. And, um, it was really great. It was really fun. Uh, I like doing that show, but again, that's not my kind of show. Um,
None of that is really my thing, but I like doing it. It's fun to go out to LA sometimes. I don't want to be in LA a lot, but it is fun to go out there. You like to poke your head in and go, give me some stuff. Do a little game show. And then I'll go back. Yeah, put me on TV. I'll go back to the woods. You used to do a joke about Family Feud, and you'd ask the audience, anybody ever been on it? And sometimes they had, hadn't they?
Oh, wow. Yeah, I'd forgotten about that. Yeah, I met a family. The joke was, if you watch Family Feud, it's always a cool black family versus the lamest white family you've ever seen. And it's like, they ask the white family, name something you bring to a barbecue. Hummus? It's always something lame like that. And then I think I called them the...
I don't know, like a lame last name. And then somebody said that they were on the show and they had the same last name. Oh, wow. It was like a Polish last name. Yeah, Kowalski or something. I can't remember what it was. Yeah. Something like that. Yeah, I hadn't done that in a while. Thanks. It's a good job. If you could be on any show, what do you think? You should do that whole album that you used to have and just do it again as a special. I thought. And just put it out on your YouTube. I thought about doing that. Mm-hmm. I thought about doing that. You should. Because it's not out anywhere? No.
I don't know. I think it might be on Spotify. It's some of your classic jokes, and it's so good. Some of it's so bad, though. But, you know, it's like I'm sure you listen to your first album, and you go, I would never do that now. But I have pulled from that album and redid those jokes, and I like them better. Well, that might be the move. Yeah. Because you tell them better. Yeah. We all know someone who loves taking photos, but their hundreds of pictures are just wasting away on their phone. Yeah.
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Show the support by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. But what game show do you think you'd have the best chance of winning at? Probably Price is Right, right? For you? I feel like you just know what the cost of flour is. No, I really don't. I can see why you would think that, but I don't. Okay.
We talked about this a little bit on the last game show episode because I went back and kind of looked at what we talked about. I said I would do terrible on Jeopardy because I can't – I usually don't even know the answer, but I would never get in on time. But if you do, you can't get the buzzer working. Yeah, yeah. But when I watch – so when I watch Jeopardy, I do terrible at home. But when I watch Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, I do pretty well because if you give me the correct answer, I can usually –
More times than not, figure it out. If you won, who wants to be a millionaire? Would you quit comedy? What would you do? No, after I won a million dollars plus taxes. Taxes would be $400,000, so you'd lose that right off the top. Yeah. You know what's funny? I thought about this because lottery winnings, the government takes like 40%. So every time someone wins the lottery, the government wins the lottery. Yeah. Yeah.
It's funny how that works. That's pretty amazing. I mean, that's a business to be in right there. The government always wins the lottery. Yeah. That's really funny. Yeah. I've never thought about it like that. Yeah. What game shows would you guys be on? Well, I want to know, who's your phone-a-friend? You're on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? I don't think any of us are your phone-a-friend. And the question is about space. Okay.
I might call dusty just for, just to eliminate some answers just for the clip. Yeah. Yeah. I just need something on my socials. Yeah. That's very funny to go on. Who wants to be a millionaire clip farming? I'm going to get, I'm going to get some reels out of this. Uh,
You phone a friend when you know the answer, just for the clip. You know, I'm not answering your question, but... You go, you know what? I'm not going to go with that answer. I was looking. I've got different answers to this. Can you Google? Can the phone a friend use Google?
And one person said, yeah, it's allowed. I helped my friend win $50,000. I just sent it home and Googled. And then I read other places and said, no, that's not allowed. They even have security people watching the friend to make sure they don't Google. Oh. So your phone a friend is not just a random person. You're not just calling your dad and he's out fishing. No, they make sure. They know you're on standby. Okay. And you can have, I think you have a few people. So if somebody knows something more about history versus other stuff.
So I think for space, you'd have dusty. Anything astronomy, physics, dusty. Yeah. And then I'm... Like food and stuff. Food and stuff. That pretty much covers it. What would a food question be on who wants to be a billionaire? How many ways can you prepare an egg? Yeah. Uh...
If it was like the first five books of the Bible, I would definitely call Dusty. Yeah. Old Testament stuff. Yeah. You'd have him on there. Yeah. But you probably have somebody in your family that's like... Well, if you can Google, I think I got to be up there. I'm probably the fastest Googler in this. Okay. I'll give you that. In the Nate Land universe. I'd have to... I've never seen anybody work a Roku remote as fast as Aaron does. I'm so good. I tried to do a bit about this once, but I feel like I can...
I can hold any remote, and I can just feel where all the buttons are. It's impressive. I think about that. I thought about it this weekend. Every time I'm in a hotel room, and I think about you saying that. Because of that bit, or because of just me talking about it? You've said it before. When I had this weekend, it's this long, I think it was a Dish Network one. But just close your eyes, and you can feel where volume up is. You know what I mean? Yeah, because this is the biggest one. And the Roku's on the side now.
That's right. Yeah. But I can just hold it and I go, oh, I just know where it is. I don't even, yeah. Volume and channel are usually bigger buttons. Yeah. But this was like the callback to the last station and it was kind of funky. Oh, yeah, dude. I mean, I'll turn on subtitles behind my back. I'm not good. Yeah.
I'm not good, dude. Well, I remember seeing it at that old condo at the club in Huntsville. We were all hanging out there, and you were working that remote, and I was like, whoa. Yeah, dude. Page up. Dude, this guy grew up with a remote like that. Page down. I'm so good with the remote. Yeah.
I think it's just ingrained in me. There was a game show called Idiot Test. Do you remember that one? Ben Glebe was the host? Yes. I used to love that show, and he was so funny on it, too. Yeah, I love that show. Ben Glebe was in Richmond this weekend at the Funny Bone, along with a couple other comics. When you were in Quantico? Yeah, when I was in Quentin. And I almost went after my show by the... I don't know Ben, but I almost went by there just to see it. I featured for him years ago at...
Tampa, Sidesplitters. Okay. Yeah. It was good? It was good. Yeah, I liked him. We hung out. That show was great, though. It was really good. Who would you call Dusty? I don't know. Aaron. Yeah. Yeah, it depends on the question. Okay. Yeah. You know.
I got my buddy Joey if it's about guns. Joey told me he knows everything. He said, I can win any argument about gun rights. It's about gun rights. It's about gun rights. I'll call Joey. That's not really who wants to be a millionaire. It works either. Second Amendment questions. It's not a question about you have to argue for gun rights. I just say it. You ask me, you put me on the spot. I kind of want to phone a friend over that question that you just asked me. Yeah.
That's funny. But, you know, but I love game shows. Like, Let's Make a Deal. I couldn't even, I don't even, I remember seeing old Let's Make a Deal, but Wayne Brady, great on the show. Wayne Brady's great. Big fan. I don't mind Drew Carey on The Price is Right, but it's,
Bob Barker's iconic. Yeah. It's impossible to fill his shoes. Yeah. But he does a good job. He does. I used to love the dating shows. There were several, like Chuck Woolery. Does that count as a game show? Yeah. Chuck Woolery. Chuck Woolery had the... The dating game. I feel like he... Or the newlywed game. He had one...
Love Connection. That's the one I grew up watching. Love Connection was great. That's what you watched as a kid? Is this the show where he would just walk up and just like... Yeah, there's not a lot of supervision going on. These old shows, the host of them just like walks up and makes out with all the women that are contestants on it. Yeah, it's not Chuck. Okay, it's not Chuck. Okay, sorry, Chuck. Richard Dawson would kiss every contestant on Family Feud. So weird, dude. Man or woman, he would just do it. Well, that's a good point because his argument was, they said he...
They estimated 20,000 women he kissed. Was he trying to break a record? His argument was that the first time he did it, a woman was nervous and he kissed her on the cheek for good luck and then she got it right. So then he starts kissing every woman on the lips. He's like, just because they're nervous.
But he's not kissing the men. I got to set these broads at ease. You know, you're creeping them out. It is so creepy. He's like, once I've sexually assaulted them, then. Yeah, everything else is easy. Wikipedia says television executives repeatedly tried to get him to stop the kissing. They pull. Hey, dude, this is a family show, buddy. And you're just grabbing the women and kissing them. Yeah. He asked viewers to write in and vote on the matter.
the wide majority favored the kissing. Well, that's sure they were getting trolled. Yeah. Yeah. I favor it too, but not if I was one of those women, you guys don't remember love connection. I did. I did. I never watched it, but I do remember 94. That's probably when you were born, huh?
Ninety-two. Ninety-one. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. I mean, Price is Right, I think for so many kids, including myself, that's the show you watch when you're out sick. Yeah. Or snow day or something. Yeah. You watch Price is Right. Dude, when I watch Price is Right now, I can taste ginger ale. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I just taste saltine crackers and ginger ales because I was home sick from school. Upset stomach? Upset. Faking it sometimes, but yeah. Mm-hmm.
If you could spend, ask this. You ever play hooky growing up? No. You never did? I don't think so. Did you? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I did for sure. Yeah, and I think. My mom was down with it. I think my parents probably knew. Yeah.
Yeah, I did it. I saw it. I do it a lot, but I would do it a couple times a year for sure. Sometimes I would be sick. You put a thermometer up to a flashlight? Oh, no. I don't think. My mom, she was like, all right, if you're sick, then you can sit down. It didn't have to be. I got tested. Oh, yeah. So you would go that far to-
I don't remember if I actually ever did that, but I do remember faking it a couple times. They're finding out right now. Yeah, I think they probably know, though. I think everybody does that. My mom was chill about it. She's like, don't abuse it, but we'll take some days off. It's easier on her, too. You don't have to get ready and go. If you guys could spend the will on Will of Fortune or Price is Right,
If you only could do one, which one would you do? I've always wanted to spin that wheel on the Price is Right. Me too. I get so annoyed when guys don't give it a good spin. You got to get at least a one lap. You got to go up first and then down. I want to get high enough that it lifts me off the ground and then really whip it down. I think they only pick guys that look like they can't spin the wheel good. Well, Bob Barker would make fun of you if you couldn't get it off the ground. He would, yeah. It was kind of great. Yeah.
You should have to do it at least all the way around once, right? It's a rule. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay. But some people try to get a two lapper. Some people try to time it on that. I think to hit the first time. Yeah. The crowd will boo you. I've seen the guy try to do that. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, price is right. Uh,
There's no time in it. My goal would be how many times can I get this thing to go around? Just let it rip. It's not even about what you get. None of those prizes are worth it. That's like bowling and going for velocity over how many pins you hit. Exactly. You want to go straight through. It's so fast that you just knock the pins down right in front of the ball. See, I think I would do it on the first spin, but if I got like 60 cents...
And I got a second spin and I need 30,
Then I'm using some strategy. I'm not just letting it rip. No, I think it's all about how good you look. Like, sure, you lose, but if they show that, if somebody clips that up, you can be like, yeah, but look how good that spin was. We talked about this last time, the guy who bid $250,000 in the showcase showdown. Oh, yeah. And Bob Barker even gave him an out. Yeah. Right? Yeah, he let him, but his out was $60,000. That's right.
And it was like a car and like a desk. I mean, it was something. Have you ever seen that? No. So poor guy. I think he's a, he's in the Navy. Yeah. It's like a car and a trip to, I don't know, Lexington, like Lexington, Kentucky.
It's on YouTube if you want to watch it. $250,000. Oh, no. They go, well, hold on. Think about it now. $60,000. And then the other lady goes, $1. Oh, yeah, because it's all about not going over. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, but a car and a trip nowadays, $60,000, that's a low bid.
There was a nowadays, I don't know when this guy was on that two, 250,000 is very, it was a long time ago. But this, uh, there was a, um, former manager at, uh, Stardome. Um, he took us around. I was with Nate, took us around to do morning radio. And he said, I won this car on the prices, right? And he made it to the showcase showdown and won. Whoa. Yeah. That's the only guy I've known who's actually won on his and won.
Yeah. Here's the video, Tessie. The speaker on my laptop. I dropped, I just remembered, I dropped my laptop on the ground and now the speaker doesn't work. You would think for how much they cost, they could handle a little something. You know what I mean? Yeah.
I completely forgot that. Oh, well. I mean, headphones still work, but the speaker does not work. So there's a whole strategy, make it honest, contest on the price is right. You get there early, you get in line, and they're looking for people enthusiastic, high energy. I would never get it. I would not make it. They ask you your name, where you're from, your occupation, and
They said don't ramble. If you ramble with a simple question, they likely think you'd do that on air when the host is asking you a question. So be succinct. Be enthusiastic, but don't ramble. Yeah. Don't give a one-word answer, but limit your... Three or four. He said, I'm looking for energy, sincerity, and potential humor. It's like the opposite of jury duty. Yeah. It's kind of...
It's 325 audience members. That's about the size of Zany's. Golly, that's small. Yeah. Nine contestants get chosen. Six make it up to contestants row. You get $300 if you get up there but don't make it on stage. If you make it on stage, do you still get the $300? If you don't win your prize, you mean? Yeah. I don't think so. I don't know. When Drew Carey took over the executive producer role,
uh started making the games easier and more people winning because he wanted people to warm up to drew carey and they'll like you more if everybody's winning oh if he came in the new guy and just nobody's winning anything yeah not that would be his fault but still it's just a lot easier and they fired that producer because he was like 70 000 over budget wow
Yeah. Well, that seems about right, though. Yeah. It feels like they were waiting to fire that guy. $70,000? Yeah. I mean, that's nothing to these TV networks. Some people don't even claim their prizes because taxes. Yeah. Which makes sense. Well, you claim the prize and then sell the thing. Yeah. You get the car and then you sell it. Sell it for $250,000. Yeah. If you can get it.
Yeah, but if you can't sell it, I mean, now the hassle's on you to, I got all these taxes and if I don't sell all this stuff. That's what happened when Oprah gave away cars to everyone.
I think everyone either sold the car or ended up in some kind of financial trouble because of the taxes. We talked about this last time. It's more the government. Oprah tries to give out a car and the government's like, but what about us? We didn't get a car. You did JFL or one of those shows with Danielle Perez. Yes. She's in a wheelchair. She went on Price is Right and her...
thing she was trying to win was a treadmill and people online of course freaked out about it but she was really cool about it she thought it was funny i mean she had fun with it yeah she didn't throw a fit and uh you gotta pivot you gotta pivot to a different prize that's very funny that's a super funny clip yeah and it's gonna happen to uh she's a really funny comedian too so
she found a way to make it funny. You think though if she's a comedian they talked about this bit beforehand? Maybe. Because you know maybe they're like let's spice it up a little bit. Let's get her on here offer her a treadmill. Drew Carey's a comedian. She's a comedian. They're like let's make a viral video out of this. We'll start selling some tickets for you. And maybe give that treadmill to Aaron. He's been breaking them out here. Laughter
If you guys were on the family feud, who would be the people you bring with you? Well, I think we should do a Nate Land family feud. I think Nate could probably make it happen at this point. How many? Is there five up there? Five, yeah. Oh, five? We do Steven. Yeah. Okay. Or Abigail. Oh, yeah. It'd be fun. Or Adrian. Yeah. Nah. I was with you, too. Oh, okay. Well, okay. Besides that, if you had to take your family, who would it be?
We've talked about this with my family. I think it's... Oh, y'all already? Yeah, because we talked about it because we have six in our family. So it's like somebody's getting left out and they have to leave out. I think my little brother would just not want to do it. See the one with Purdue? Yeah, yeah.
He's out. He's the black sheep of the family. Yeah. Until Big Ten school. Yeah. No, he's just not. He just wouldn't want to do it. So I'd get him. What if it was you and your dad and all his wives? That'd be fun. Yeah. That would be fun. I think what I would do would be me and my wife. Yeah. Yeah.
My dad, her dad, and my mom. Oh, that'd be fun. I think character-wise, that'd be funny because my parents aren't married, but both very Southern and country. And then my wife's dad, very country, but Canadian country. So I think it'd be really mix it up. And then me and my wife could fight about it.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. You and your wife, your dad, your mom, and Hannah's dad. Yeah. Okay. I think that's what I would do. Now, if it had to be just my side of the family, I think I'd go mom and dad and then my two brother-in-laws that I have. Yeah. Because I think that'd be fun. I don't care. I mean, listen, I think you win $20,000, right? The government takes...
40%. So you're down to what? 12,000. And then there's five of you split that, you know, who couldn't use a couple of grand, but it's not the end of the world. You're covering the flights. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's not a very profitable show. You break it even. So you just have some fun.
Yeah, just have a good time. We'll get some clips. Yeah. Have you ever come up with an idea for a game show? I've tried. Okay. Any that you want to talk about or are you still working on it? No, I never. You're still working on it? I remember a reality show idea you had. I had a reality show idea. I still like it, though. I don't want to share it. Okay. Well, I had one that I shared on my podcast called The Rearranger. You ever heard of that one? No. Where I go, I'm the rearranger. Yeah.
Dusty Slade, the rearranger. Yeah, and so I go into people's houses that are really messy, and I don't bring... I can have tools, but I don't bring anything in. I just take what you have...
and make it better. I make it make sense. You don't take anything out either? Well, maybe I can take stuff out. If there's trash, I'll take it out. But for the most part, I just come in and I go, this is a mess. And then I go, this should go here. This should go here. And by the end, we've rearranged your house and now it's better. Uh-huh. The rearranging. Sounds like the worst show of all time. I think it would crush.
The Rearranger. Just four minutes of dusty moving books on a bookcase. Just pushing a chair. I could bring some tools so I could hang some shelves if you had them. Okay. You know what I mean? No, no tools. No, I can do tools, but I'm not bringing shelving in.
Okay. I got to take what you have and make it work. Use your tools. Yeah. I've done this for a couple of places and I feel like I improved it. I stay, I was staying with my buddy in LA one time. He had a roommate situation where him and his roommate, they didn't get along. So I had to sleep in his bedroom on the floor because he was like, my roommate's not going to like it if you're sleeping on the couch. So I said, okay. And then,
Their living room was just a wreck, just no organization. And so I go, let me rearrange this. He goes, no, my roommate's not going to like it. So while he was gone, I rearranged it. I rearranged their living room. And then he came home and he goes, oh, my roommate's not going to like this. She came home. She goes, oh, this is great. I love this. And I go, yeah, because everybody wants to live in an organized place. That's right. That's right.
Yeah, you want your house rearranged every now and then. Yeah. She just said that while you were there. As soon as you left. As soon as you left, she just, don't invite that guy back. Yeah. I'm the rearranger. They bonded over you. Yeah. Well. Have you had an idea for one, Brian? I'll say this, though. If she liked what they had going on before and was mad about what I did, then that, she's got, she needs better help. You know what I mean? Yeah. She needs to chime in. Yeah. Yeah. Delete me.
A guy who comes to your house with all your leaves and bags them up, and then he just leaves with them. He leaves with the leaves. Yeah. The lever. Yeah. None of this really has the structure of a show, but I like the enthusiasm. The Rearranger's a hot shot. I guess the answer is I don't have, no. I'm glad I said it on Nate Land. This has a bigger audience in my podcast, so maybe I can get a show. You don't even do your podcast anymore. Well, I've taken some time off. Extreme makeover radio.
He's like, I'm remodeling my kitchen. I'm like, how long does it take to take a microwave out? It's taking a lot longer than you would think. Just take the microwave out and you're done. The rearranger over here. We have no microwave in our house now. The rearranger can't arrange his own house. Yeah, this is not a good selling point for your show. This is construction. I'm talking about rearranging. Oh, so you would never do anything this intense on the show. I wouldn't rearrange your kitchen cabinet. How would you rearrange the studio in here if you had to? Yeah.
Take a lot of the Nate stuff down. Yeah. Well, no, you don't have to take it out, but you could put some other things here. Just rearrange it. Put it off camera. Yeah, I mean, you know, I had to fight really hard to get this, and then you got a bigger one, and then so I try to rearrange that.
You got a couple of things. You got a podcast that you don't even do anymore over there. Somebody stopped you. I got stopped. No, the studio's great. So this is not something to rearrange. But I would need a volunteer. I would need someone to say, you know what? My house is a bit of a mess. I'm not talking a hoarder.
I don't want to come over and, you know, clean up. You don't want anybody who actually needs help. No, no, no. A hoarder, you know, like that TV show, that's too much. Hoarders? Yeah, it's too much. Yeah, what's the name of that? Yeah. You need... It's on the tip of my tongue. Yeah, half of the episodes are Dusty showing up and going, it's actually a pretty all right. Yeah, yeah. And it's a short episode. I wouldn't change a thing. Yeah.
Now, I can always find – my family got upset with me because I'd go to their house and be like, you know, if you put the TV on this wall, I think it'd really be better for you in here. And it would be. TV height.
is a big, is an epidemic in this country. And I've been trying to fix it. Yeah. I've been trying to call attention to this on social media. TV above the fireplace is a real phenomenon that I don't care for. Well, that's the trap people fall into is they think for some reason they have to put it above the fireplace. Yeah, I don't like it. But you got to re...
you got to rearrange how you think about the room. You know, at Nate's house, they have that, but they actually have the thing that can lower the TV. When you, if you're going to do it, you need that. It's still a little too high in my opinion, but I'm not going to go to Nate's house and tell him he's doing things wrong. But if I had a TV show called the TV rearranger and I show up, well, I don't steal my name, but that's about to take off. You could do the TV adjuster, the TV adjuster. Oh,
always wanted you guys to come to my house sometime but now i don't yeah because i've seen i've seen how high your tv is you got a high tv oh so high yeah it's over the fireplace he stands on a stepping stool to watch the game yeah we gotta rearrange that i uh i picture you having a neat house though i bet it is really neat i mean it was before we had a two-year-old yeah but i bet it's still pretty neat though as long as the housekeepers keep it
Rosalita, get in here. I'm joking. But yeah, my TV is over the mountain. It seems like the obvious place in our house. I feel like that's where a family portrait goes. Yeah, I think you just... Of you on Netflix. That's your family portrait. A giant photo of you.
Well, you say that, but I mean, if that's what you want to put up at your house, that's fine. I'll put one up at my house. Yeah. Yeah. A Dusty Slate Netflix poster. Yeah, I think you got to... I think it's... Once you have a TV that's low, that's eye level, it's pretty great. Yeah. Just start to think about it every... It'll honestly ruin TVs for you because almost everywhere it's too high. Almost everywhere. Well, the good thing is it doesn't bother us, so...
Doesn't bother you. You seem like you watch a lot of TV though, right? Again, yeah. But before I had a child, I didn't watch more. And you, how do you get a recliner? You kind of lay back in it. So you're kind of looking up like that. Like a planetarium. Yeah. So you'd put it on a, on a stand, like,
You can mount it. A lot of people don't need to mount it, though. A lot of people will mount it too high right above a TV stand. And you go, well, just put it on the TV. You got to stand right there, dude. Yeah. Drop it on. Yeah. But I get it. You want to mount it. You want it high. You want it out of the way. But it's just once it's eye level. But I'm not walking around mad about this all day. Like, I'm just, you know, I'm not.
I'm not actually upset. It's just a funny thing to talk about. I just think that the TV being over the fireplace has replaced a good family photo. I think so. That we used to have, and now we're putting our TV there. Where's your family photo going? Well, combine the two and have an aura frame. Yeah.
yeah exactly that's what i'm talking about put a giant aura frame yeah yeah they do make those flat screens now that look they have like picture frame borders i like that looks like those are pretty nice i like that what's your idea for a game show impractical jokers but raise the stakes dude i want somebody representing themselves in court for a real crime sounds like a reality show well they have court tv
but I want comedians in their ear telling them stuff, but their life is on the line. Wow. But the trade-off is the show will pay for all their legal fees. They'll pay for everything, but they have to do, they got Joe Gatto in their ear.
Wow. They're on trial for murder. They're on trial for... Okay. Well, I think first season will stay away from violent crimes. Okay. Just to ease the audience into everything. Small claims. Well, I'm going to piggyback off that. Okay. Survivor, but you can really die. Okay. You got to sign a lot of paperwork to be on that show. Yeah. Sounds like a bit of a... Stranded, naked, and alone, and you really are alone. Yeah. Yeah.
No camera crew. Yeah. You're just out there. We drop you off. We drop you off in a beaver parachute. Yeah. Do you know that? You don't get that reference. I saw a clip about it. Yep. Damn. Do you remember on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? I think it was the British version. The Scandal. Oh.
Oh, yeah. I watched the whole documentary about it. Yeah, there was a documentary about it. Oh, I got one. Who wants to get out of debt? You do the show. You have to publicly display how much debt you have. And then you try to, instead of who wants to be a millionaire, who wants to break even? That's what you're trying to get. That's a good one. Yeah. And then if they lose, they go further in debt? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You actually go to jail for the debts.
And then in court, you have Aaron in your ear telling you how to plead. Do the people in Jeopardy who – oh, go ahead. A show called Jeopardy, but you're actually in Jeopardy. Yeah. Your life is on the line. My show can be called Double Jeopardy because it's – you don't get another chance. Yeah. If you lose this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Do the contestants on Jeopardy, if they don't win, but they were up, say, $3,000, do they get to keep that? They get $1,000 and $2,000 brought to you by Aleve. What? I think so. If you win, this is how I think it works. You glitch out? Yeah. What are you talking about?
I don't know what's going on. I have no idea what you're talking about. So when you win, you get the dollar amount that you had, right? But I think the two losers get...
one thousand dollars or two thousand dollars and then it puts a little logo for a leave up there so i think it's brought to you by a leave they get one thousand dollars two thousand dollars okay now i get it so i meant like okay it's a set amount of money if you yes three thousand two hundred fourteen dollars no you'll get you'll get if you're in second you get two thousand if you're in 30 get one thousand i'm pretty sure
I don't know what is so funny right now. Well, I guess you thought I did. It was brought to you by a leave thing. Did you think I randomly just... You just went into an ad. Thought, this guy's so good. Yeah. The only way to get 20% off is to... All right, so the scandal on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is they would read the guy question. He would read the four answers out loud.
the contestant and his wife and friend were in the audience. Is that right? And they would, one of them would cough whenever he said the right answer. It's, it's as obvious as the Houston Astros banging the trash can. Probably wouldn't be on this podcast with all my coffee. Yeah. You'd be like, wait, wait, that guy is in the audience coughing all the time. And then they look at him and they go, ah, it's just, he's just the age where that just happens. Yeah.
He would lose every time because I would throw him off. Well, Nate clears his throat a lot, too. We could hide a lot of secrets in this podcast. Yeah, the two guys that don't smoke at all are coughing the most. Clearing their throats. I'll catch up. I'll get there at some point. So, yeah, so that was the scandal. You were saying as obvious as the Astros.
banging the trash cans for off-speed pitches. And you're like, well, once you know to listen for it, it's the most obvious thing in the world. Now, once you know somebody's coughing, it was literally like they coughed twice for B, three times for C, four times for D. Or was it just when it was mentioned they coughed? It was just when the right answer was mentioned. When the person said it. It's so obvious.
I love a show like, you know, like, I don't know, like a detective show. I've seen an episode. I don't know if it was Monk or if it was Columbo, but where there's a game show scandal and they're trying to uncover it. This is Mr. Monk and the game show. I love it. Yeah. I love that. I don't want to ruin the ending, but it's a very obvious thing too. Yeah. Monk.
I want to write a detective show, but just the idea that I would have to come up with these every time. I'm so impressed by detective shows. Because they literally have to solve a case every episode in a creative way. I agree. I guess they go through files and files of real cases. For inspiration. And write around it. I mean, how else could you? I don't know, man. Just get really smart people together and just have them.
try to solve this stuff. I've been watching a lot of Andy Griffin lately. Griffith. Yeah. Andy Griffith. Andy Griffin. Andy Griffin. Andy Griffin growing up. I think that's like black Andy Griffith, but it's Eddie Griffin as the... The Eddie Griffin show starring Eddie Griffin. It's great. He always has to solve a problem. Every episode, a problem comes, he has to solve it. And...
It's a moral dilemma every show. Yeah. Kind of. Yeah. I feel like sometimes, though, I don't have a good example, so I should probably say this. He misleads you a little bit, not to hurt your feelings. Andy Griffith? Everyone thinks it's always the most morally pure show ever, but I feel like sometimes. Well, he often has to, he tries to solve the problem while making it look like Barney solved the problem. Yeah. He's always trying to. He's surrounded by idiots. Yeah. So he's trying to help Barney out.
There was a feminism episode that they just had. And even, you know. They just had? Well, I just watched. Okay. Season one. Years ago. It's black and white. But.
But I'm like, you know, I'm not, I don't get into, you know, feminism too much. But even I was like watching this being like, geez, Andy, like you're like being a real misogynist here, you know? And in the end, it was a- He got canceled. Yeah. He couldn't be sheriff anymore. The final episode of Eddie Griffith Show. They take his badge.
Barney Sheriff. But I'm just, I'm watching and I'm like, you know, take it easy, dude. And Aunt B becomes Sheriff. Yeah. Sheriff B. But they got rid of A, Sheriff B. But they had to, you know, they had to go hard so that in the end, when he comes around, you really feel the impact. Yeah, yeah. You know? Sure. It's just good writing. Yeah. Yeah.
I should wrap it up. There was a, on the dating game, a serial killer. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that was pretty, pretty wild. There's been a few times where someone has identified a criminal on the run on a,
It's almost like the same narcissism that causes you to be a serial killer. That's what drives you to be on a reality game show. Yeah, that's a good point. Maybe you're so good at being a serial killer that you're like, gosh, am I going to have to get on TV to get caught? Yeah.
I mean, come on. I enjoy it, but there's no money in it. Yeah. I'm doing it for the fame. Yeah. Love of the game. Yeah. All right. Well, I guess we should wrap it up. Let's wrap it up. Uh, should we talk about where we're at? Yeah, we should do it. Uh,
This Thursday, I am at Laugh Out Lounge in Winter Haven, Florida. Come to that show. Look, it's Valentine's. Thursday's the 13th. Don't go out on Valentine's night. Never. That's the worst night to go out. But if you want to celebrate Valentine's, go out the night before. Come to my show at Laugh Out Lounge. You'll have a good time. Laugh Out Lounge? Yeah. Okay. LOL. All right. Aaron Weber here. Oh, I'm not done. Okay. I'm sorry.
I'm just getting started. Okay. Yeah, let's do it. And then Saturday, I am in Cocoa, Florida at Lineage Church, another laugh all night from 6 to 7. And then I'm in Mars Hill, North Carolina. I mentioned a couple weeks ago, I'm going to Montana for the first time, Bozeman, Montana. Nice. Love Montana. Last Best Comedy Club. What'd you say? I love Montana. Yeah. Last Best Comedy Club, that's March 7th. And March 12th is my next Brian Bates and Friends here at Zany's. Boom. All right.
We're doing it. This weekend, if you do want to go out on Valentine's Day and you're in the Bloomington, Indiana area, I'll be performing for the first time at the Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana this weekend. Great club. February 14th and 15th. And then next week, I got a fun West Coast run. I'm going to be in Tacoma, Washington and Spokane. So if you're in Washington...
Come see me next week. Bloomington, Indiana comedy addict. Jared really cares about the club. Yeah. He really cares about it. It has a great reputation because of that. All right. Uh, also another Valentine's day show. If you happen to be in Fresno, California, I'll be there February 14th, uh, February 15th. I'm in Sacramento. And then I'm gonna go ahead and just do a couple of weekends. February 21st, Boise, Idaho show is sold out. There may be a couple of tickets. Uh,
February 22nd, Salt Lake City, Utah. And then I'm going to be in the Villages in Florida on the 26th, 25th. Zany's on the 26th. And then I'm filming my special February 28th in Chattanooga, Tennessee. Nice. So these last shows that I've just, this will be me ramping up for the special.
So it'll be hot, tight shows. It's going to be, you know, what you'll see on the special when it's really strengthened it up. So these are going to be super hot shows. You know, my prediction on the New Year's episode was you would do late night for the first time and you would start selling out
clubs left and right. We're already... We're done the late night. I don't know how... Maybe you're selling out the clubs. We'll see. And I said, Dusty would start selling out theaters left and right. I think he said he already was. And I said, your special would be one of the hottest specials of the year. Boom. All right. Well, I hope that's true. From your lips to God's ears, brother. You know, speaking of Tonight Show, though, one time...
After my first time doing the, I know, after my first time doing the Tonight Show, me and Aaron were doing a show called The Dog House in Fayetteville, North Carolina. He's standing out front. There's a lady out there smoking. I'm inside. She goes, this guy any good? He goes, he's in the Tonight Show. She goes, I don't mean, and then throws the cigarette out, goes back inside, starts cooking.
That's great. I've told that story so much. That's unfortunately a story where you have to edit it. It's not quite as good. But you know, I don't mean man throws it on the ground. So funny. I thought about her this past weekend. She's probably, you know, but I got to tell that lady, it does mean something. Of course it does. Yeah. Uh,
And go watch you on the new Hollywood Squares. Boom, tonight. Signature dish, YouTube. 30 minutes. Knock it out. It's good. Thank you all. We love you. It's not lost on us. And have a pleasant evening. Bye. Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the Audioboom platform.
Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.
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