250: #250 School featuring Derrick Stroup
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Hello, folks, and hey, Bear. Welcome to the Nateland Podcast. I am back, Nate Bargetzi. Just reintroduced myself. Brian Bates. Okay. Dusty Slay. Filling in for Aaron Weber, the other Aaron Weber. I didn't even realize it until right now. So you didn't know it? Yeah. Derek Stroop. Hello, hello. Thank you all for having me. Hello. Hello.

We're back. Show you some Nate Land stuff. Steven Rogers' hour special, Half of We, is on the YouTube channel, Nate Land YouTube channel. Go check it out. Don't sleep on air. And Werba's special signature discs are Nick Thunes. They're all on there. My book's coming out May 6th. New Nate Land merch, if you have. Then we got another podcast. And I'm bringing back season three of Nate Land Presents. Pretty fun.

The showcase tickets are on sale. If you want to be a part of that June 22nd, 23rd and 24th at the lab, you know, that thing did better than like, it's fun. Yeah. Cause it was at first when the first season I was like, ah, I was like, I, you know, I was like, I want it to be a value for the comedians that, uh, we use. And, uh, but a lot of people, yeah, a lot of people, uh,

I've watched it and a lot of comics and it's like, you know, it's a place for, you know, like we had live at Gotham. Did you have any, were you doing any, did you have anything? No. Was it already done? Comedy Central, was it,

I think basically was done by the time I got it. I mean, I did the Netflix half hour, the stand-ups. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. AXIS TV had that show. Oh, yeah, yeah. Gotham. Yeah, Gotham. Gotham City Live. Yeah, yeah. I came in at a time where all that was done, but there was also not Dry Bar and Don't Tell yet. Yeah. Yeah, Don't Tell's around, so that's a good... Yeah, Don't Tell Comedy's...

One that's out there that's good that a lot of you did don't tell. I did, for sure. Weird time in social media when we were just posting pictures of ourselves doing stand-up with a small joke written on it. That was our reels back in the day. Yeah, I remember. Stand-up shots. Like Vecchione would type in jokes on Twitter to see how they do, and then that's almost like it'd be where you were trying. Yeah. And now it's just put crowd workout. Yeah.

You try to do it on Twitter. You go, hey, what's up? Where are you from? Yeah. People do do that. Do they? I think they call it engagement farming. They find some way to get people to – some rage bait. Yeah, yeah. Engagement farming. Wow. That's where you post something that you know is just going to get – Your girl does? Is that where you're going with? No, I wasn't. It's where you just – you post something that you know is going to fire people up just so they comment a lot.

Yeah, no, that makes sense. Yeah, trolling. Yeah, I see that. I've done that. You've trolled. No, no. I've done some engagement farming, I'm sure. Where should I go? Kansas City. Where should I eat? Exactly. Y'all point me the right direction. Yeah. Hello, Daytona. Your boy's in town.

Where should I get some good spaghetti? That's right. And then it's just nobody. Nobody. That's the funnest part is to go see when someone does that and nobody responds to it. Yeah. But nobody knows that. Like I was in Toledo. I said, y'all send me to your best sandwich spot. I can't wait to check it out. Nobody sent me to their best. I found my own spot. Yeah, because there is no sandwich spot. Then you go, thanks for the DMs. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.

You guys, I think you guys want to hear about how my sandwich stuff went. A lot of messages I got. No messages. No one's asking. That's me seeing someone post that. I've been getting a lot of questions about what I do, my routine. No one's asking. Nobody has ever. Yeah.

Somebody requested this joke tonight. Yeah. Toledo. Yeah. I don't... People used to do that at open mics. Yeah. And like nobody. No one. You're just doing an old joke at the open mic. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's not going like you thought. Somebody asked me to do this. I mean, I still work with comics that'll...

clothes on it they'll say people always ask me to do this if i don't do it so here we go yeah i know this joke's 14 years old but uh it's requested a lot yeah david telly says this joke sold it can vote oh yeah which is funny to have jokes that you know you can have jokes that'll be 18 years i've i'm 21 right 22 years in geez yeah

I've just got jokes that are talking back at this point. We're not quite voting yet, but they're getting an attitude. They're getting an attitude. They don't like where they're at. At 22 years in, imagine you're still doing a joke from that original set. Well, it would have to be old enough to vote. So I don't know if I... I don't think I have one that I use. I don't have one. I don't even have one that I would remember. But I mean, I have one from... Huh? I can remember yours. Yeah, but that I would still use? Like it would be...

Sorry I didn't bring my compass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry I didn't bring my compass today. Northeast directions. But I mean, those jokes, that's old. Yeah, it's a joke that could go. But now, like you are bringing your compass. You have a phone. Yeah. So now it's stupid. Yeah. Now it's stupid. That's the point. Yeah, it's stupid. That's what you are when you're 18 and you vote. You're stupid.

That's the message Dusty's sending. That's not the message I'm sending. Dusty, I think everybody heard it. I think. Yeah, I mean, you know, maybe the 18-year-old joke doesn't need to be heard all the time. I had a very funny thing last night. Or was it? Listen, we were talking about. But like a conspiracy. Oh, Eric was. I was talking to Eric. Barber trainer.

Let's just say barber. Now we're back to training. We're lifting weights. All right. Boom. How's the donut challenge going? That's what he said. He told me that. Oh, yeah. The donut challenge is, you know, let's see what happens. Okay. But we're headed in a direction now. Okay. You got to do move. I got to look something. Yeah. I don't want to be embarrassed.

And I wouldn't be. It would be, or I myself would be embarrassed of myself. Yeah, but you got to create some new before pictures at some point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I have 20 years of them, 30 years of them. But you got pictures that people will share. They'll go, oh, look at old Nate and now new Nate. So you need new befores. I have all of them. Yeah. I have every in between, every whatever. But somebody was saying a point about,

He was saying, I forget what we were talking about. He was saying something. He's like, you know, that, oh, there's molecules. If so many molecules in the world, there's more than planets in the space. And he's like, you know, I mean, he's like, if there's planets in the space, if you believe that.

And it was just very funny to think like, I know, but it's funny to think you have to go be politically correct to conspiracy theorists now. Like if you say you're like, I could see forever if the earth was flat. I mean, if you think the earth's flat, then I'm not stepping on your toe. It was just like the very funny, that's gonna be a pretty funny sketch idea to do a sketch

Where you have to apologize, like you have to... For the most ridiculous things. Political correctness, it's not the most ridiculous, it's just the idea that political correctness has gone so far. Yeah. That you're now like, you know, I think JFK was not the best, if you believe this, you know, who killed him, killed him. But...

Does that make sense? See, I feel like that's the conspiracy theorist way of putting out some feelers, letting you know, are you going this way? Because if you're going this way, this can be a different conversation. Yes. If you're a normie, if you're just a normie out here, then let's stop it now. Look, I'm not trying to start a thing. I just thought it was a very funny idea. No, no, you're getting into it. I know, but it's just a very funny idea. Like political critics could go so far. Bestie doesn't believe in molecules, so...

Yeah. Well, it's like – That's not true. Yeah, but it's – Yeah. Don't start – I don't want to make everybody –

I shouldn't have even, you know. But I do think that's how people put feelers out there. Yeah, yeah. There's a lot of planets out there if you, you know. Well, Colin Quinn, I think Colin Quinn used to have a joke about it like in a car, like you just, are you, people start talking about the person that just got out of the car. Yes. Like when you drop someone off and then you're like, what about that guy? And then all three of you bash that guy then the next person gets out then you bash that. And then at the end you're like, well, I don't want to get out of this car. But,

But it's like, you can do that where you, I used to say, when you go on the road with a comic at the beginning, you'd be driving together. You'd start mentioning names, like, who are we comfortable trashing? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Comedy is very much gossipy, rumory. We start making fun of someone. And so you kind of go like, what about this guy? And you're like, I'm pretty good friends with that guy. You're like, okay, okay, not that guy. What about this guy? And you're like, eh, that guy's been good to me. What about this guy? You're like, I don't know if I like that guy. Okay.

Boom. And then we just jump on board. Yeah, I feel like you got to accept. I feel like I've accepted this, that I have friends that I trash talk a lot of people with. And I have accepted that when I'm not around, that friend's probably trash talking me. And I'm okay with it. Yeah. They weren't trash talking friends. Well, like four years ago, I woke up and realized that I was in no group chats anymore.

and it gave me cold sweats. Because if you're not in group chats, you're in group chats. Yeah. I go, I got to get in some group chats. Yeah. Because I'm out here floating around by myself, and you got to find some groups to get in, or you'll be part of the conversation. I'm not in a lot of group chats. Me, I'm not in a lot. Now I'm in a few more, but you don't want to not be in any. Yeah. That's dangerous. Yeah, we have a group podcast. We have our group chat. And I got some where I'm like, God.

somebody else will get added in or whatever. And I go, well, this is not going to be the same. Yeah. It's tough. It's tough when someone gets added in a group chat where you're like, what are you doing? You're like, even though we haven't mentioned that person by name, their essence is what we're talking about. Yeah. And you're like, and you just made it too personal. Yeah. And now it's like not fun. Yeah. People it's, uh,

I imagine like group, that's with the workup settings. I imagine everybody does it. Oh, yeah. And you have group, now that I'm in the group chat world, which I love, you have different group chats for different things. Like just what you want to talk. You have a golf group chat. You got some family group chats. You got some other, you got the comedy talking trash group chats. Yeah. And so you get to bounce around a little bit, you know, and that's fun. Yeah. Yeah.

I like Instagram where you find, you hit share and then people just pop up. And then I go, this person, this person, this person doesn't need to see this one. That is so real. That is so real. That's so funny, man. My Hispanic friends, if I get anything about Mexican food, I go, they'll love it. Yeah. I'll send it to them. No one believes you have Hispanic friends. Just said that for no reason. They're getting less and less by every day. No reason.

All the people of color in my life, they're like, Derek, get out of here. That dumb accent. I have color in my life. Yeah. It's by Gregory? Yeah. I said Greg. Today's his last day, so there you go. Greg, damn it.

Tomorrow will be a different... That's why I'm not going to be on the podcast next week. Because I refuse. That's why Aaron's not here today. Yeah. Because Greg's here. I go, look, it's a lot of stuff. We got to balance. We got to balance a lot of things. Dusty, when it comes to spinning something...

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Yeah. So I guess we say where we're at. Haven't been here. So it's been a minute. Happy to be back. Sorry, I haven't been here. It's been crazy. I know I'm going to be gone a lot too. Yeah, I don't know. I've been just doing, you know, I've been out there, man. Went to Europe. Yeah, there's some comments. Oh, yeah, yeah. Perfect. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So I can talk about where I've been. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They ban knives in the UK, is that right? Was it hard to find knives when you're there? I wasn't looking for any knives. I got given a knife today.

Tell me to keep it under my seat. Don't let anybody find it. Is that cool? Yeah. I mean, that's a good old-fashioned Southern gift to me. I collect knives. I got some under the seat. Under that seat. It's like Dwight. I have some knives, but I don't ever carry them. But I got given one today. And then, you know, yeah. We were joking. We had – did we talk about knives? Travis –

My buddy Travis on the road, we went to the Spy Museum. He had to hide his knife. Did I talk about that? Maybe they didn't ban that. He did it at the Laker game too once. Holy smokes. He had his knife with him, and so he goes and dicks it in the dirt, and then he looks up, and there's just free lockers for people's knives. Right.

He's got dirt all over his hands. He's got dirt all over his hands. He's got to remember where it's at. He's got to now go out there afterwards, look like the other people just digging in dirt. You know, because in L.A., outside the Lakers, there's probably a lot of people digging in the dirt. So you've got to be like, do you mind if I jump in here and get my knife out of here? That's outside of a Lakers game. People are walking. He's digging into the ground. People are walking past him.

And it's hilarious. He gets a stab with a needle. It's not like he went off to the side. No. He's like, there are people as close as me and Bates are just right. And they're just like going, that guy's putting that knife in that dirt. Everybody just sees it. Not to blow up a spot. You know, see Travis out. You're going to know. But there's a knife in the dirt around this building. Yeah. If you go search around the building. It's not a tough read.

This weekend, I was in West Bend, Wisconsin at the Bend Theater just outside Milwaukee. Fan brought me this brewer's hat. Thank you very much. Great crowd. A lot of folks came out. Look at this. What's a brewer? Like somebody brews beer? Yeah. That makes sense. I never thought about it until right this second. Look at that. How awesome is that? That's from Jasmine Lozano. That really looks like real beer.

Like the faces and stuff. Yeah. Can you design the faces or something? I don't know how they do that. Hmm. Hmm. Am I the gray hair? That's you. Yeah. Oh, that's silver? Man. They got you full on gray. Got me full on gray. Yep. Yep. Very cool. That is cool. Had to haul that thing back on a plate. Yeah. Easy. Easy. Yeah. How'd you do? What'd you do? Keep it...

She, well, Aaron kept tipping over, but I just put it in the middle seat. They've seen a lot of guys like Brian trying to protect Legos on flights. I promise you. They go, come back here, man. They go, peanut allergy, aisle three. Yeah, you're right here.

Before I even brought it out, they're like, Lego guy? Lego guy? He goes, let me guess. Fragile? Come on back. It's him and that. Everything's fragile. I'm fragile. That's fragile. He doesn't need to be bumped into. Correct. Everybody else got water. They gave him apple juice. No, you're going to be fine. All right, that's too far. All right. What boarding group were you? B. I'm always B. Yeah.

You haven't made it to the... I guess you're driving everywhere. B is not bad, I don't think. I get the seat I want. But C, as they say, C stands for center aisle. Oh, that's funny. Yeah, that's pretty much true. Center seat, yeah. If you're... You used to be able to get C and you could get lucky in the back and find a window or an aisle. I feel like you used to be. I think it's out of control now. Like where it's like once they started...

Pre-boarding and all this, it's just – and then when they have them on from another flight, nothing more frustrating than that. You get on, you're like, who are these people? And they're already in the seats that you want. Oh, yeah. And they're like, well, they came from – they're staying with us. Yeah. Well, nobody pre-boards more than Southwest. Yeah.

I mean, they go through everybody. Then they start going, anybody else that's not on this flight that would like to join before the A group, would you like to come up? They're begging for pre-boards. I mean, they want more and more. And then when you get on the plane, they go, please fan out and move to the back of the plane. I want to go, no. The thing that attracted, I can sit wherever I want. Have y'all ever had them do that? You try to sit in the first or second. And they go, please spread out. And I go, I'm going to sit wherever I want.

That's the point. Yeah. You got to pay for that ride. That's my ride. You can't tell me what to. And when handicapped people that are in the wheelchair to get on the plane, then sat at the aisle seat. And I'm like, I got to get in there. Can you get up? Yeah. I mean, are you going to get up for me? So if they can't walk, they should be forced to sit in the window. Yes. Yes.

That's what you crammed in there. Dusty Airlines. Yeah. And if they have to use the bathroom, they got to really think about it. You know what I mean? Or in the cargo hold. Did you go to the bathroom? You would make sure you would ask them before they sit down. Yeah. Did you go? Yeah. Yeah. Go before you board. Yeah. Go before you board. Yeah. But anyway, it was a great show. Thanks for everybody who came.

Awesome. This past weekend, I was out with Mr. John Crist. We were in Fort Myers, Tampa, Florida, and then Pensacola. So yeah, hot shows. Love doing comedy in Florida. So we had, you know, the weather's always good, you know? Is it nice for him to perform where the crowd has the same jeans that he has on? Yeah.

And it's pretty good. I don't even know really what that mean by that. Yeah. But I kind of. Yeah. Yeah. No, he wasn't the only one with paint splatter on the denim. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like the pockets got a big design on it. Oh, like, oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah. Tom Hardy's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I used to wear those jeans. Yeah. Yeah. I had some. What is something? No, we all used to wear those jeans, but we're older now. Yeah. Yeah. We've changed. Yeah.

But yeah, great weekend. It was hot shows. He sold them all out. It was a lot of fun. That's awesome. Yeah. Okay. Well, I was off too. I say too. Yeah, nobody else was off. I was off. Aaron was off. I was off. But I did a couple of shows at Zany's. Did a couple of things at the lab. I did the Zany's Comedy All-Stars. And then I did the Dark and Dirty show. Oh, come on. Yeah. I just got on it. And I just...

I did some old jokes that I used to do. I didn't really get dark with it. Vaguely dirty. Vaguely dirty. Just for fun, you know. Yeah. You gotta let loose sometimes.

Let it out. Out of all the stuff you stand for. Well, you know what, though? You get sucked into peer pressure. Well, mainly I talked, well, I wanted to just get out there. And mainly I talked about children's books, like the old school children's books, and some of the words that they use that we don't really use anymore. That's a fun premise.

That's an old joke? No, no. That was my new one. Oh. But then I did some old ones. Yeah. That are vaguely dirty, but, you know. I mean. Yeah. I've lived a wild life. Yeah. I mean, growing up. Children's books. I've lived a wild life. You're growing up in Trailer Park. Like, you're not. Yeah. You're going to be both things. It's amazing. Yeah, yeah. You're going to. That turned out the way I did. It's amazing. It could have gone so many directions. Yeah. So many. Mm-hmm.

It's wild. It did go a lot of directions. It did. Look at your picture. Yeah. Well, that guy's okay. It got worse. Yeah, but I mean, look how he looks. That's a different direction. Yes. That is true. Yeah. Yeah. That was a hot look, though. I'm going to be honest with you. Eminem was popular at the time. He was. I'll be honest with you. I did this before I even knew who Eminem was, though.

Wow. That's the most Dusty thing I've ever heard. Most people would have been like Eminem had bleached hair. That's when Dusty goes, I had no idea about Eminem. I just did it on my own. Yeah. That's impressive. How quick did Eminem come? Well, I was working at Western Sizzling, you know, and somebody said, told me about Eminem. I had no idea. So, you know, his first song had just come. That was probably, I don't know.

2000 or something. Yeah, 99, 98, 99. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Eminem. You just felt it. Yeah. All right. We'll start. Do you guys comment? Hank Hooper. Brian seems to look down on Dusty and doubt everything he says. Correct. Lame.

Dusty holds to some far-out stuff, but his gardening opinions seem pretty reasonable. Brian sounds like he believes everything NPR reports.

That was NPR. NPR. What did I say? NPR. NPR reports. Well, I'm not sure what he's referring to here. I get a lot of this, though, where they go, he's got a lot of crazy stuff, but on this subject, he's right. We talked about gardening last week, Derek. Really, I'm right on all of them. I don't know about the moon, but his composting tips are really good. Yeah, that's basically what he's saying. Yeah. And nobody knows about the moon. I mean, that's the thing. Are you into gardening? Yeah.

Me, I mean, not living in New York City, but I love to garden. I grew up with a huge garden. When I first moved to Colorado, I had a raised bed garden. I had a couple of them. So, yeah, I can't wait to have a garden again. What'd you grow? I had tomatoes, peppers, onions. All right.

I had some hanging cucumbers. Cake. I grew up in a pickling family. I want to pickle stuff. You know what I mean? I love that. Yeah, I'm into it. You grew pickles. Yeah, well, eventually. Eventually, yeah. Did you grow your own dill?

No, we didn't grow our own deal. No, we had... You remember those old... They used to come in like a packet and you just rip it open like the bread and butter and then you'd like drop it in the packet and then you can it. But yeah, I mean, we had canned... I mean, canned everything that I could... Canned tomatoes, canned anything you can... We had peach trees, pears, plums, cherry tree. We had seven apple trees, blueberries.

a little bit of everything grew up like on a gentleman's farm essentially just grew it for herself never sold it wow yeah that's what that's called yeah it's essentially gentleman's farm is going to be somebody that's going to grow stuff that's going to have all kinds of different produce but isn't doing it to make a profit they're just you know eating what they grow and kind of living off the land a little bit yeah we we bought the home like that when we showed up all this stuff was planted already so yeah it was fun okay

Beth Vedder. Thank you for a great show in Paris, Nate. I've been listening to the podcast for four years and was thrilled to have you finally come to Paris. It was great to see Nateland well represented by your openers, but was sad that the whole band wasn't there. Any chance we can get a live taping of the podcast in Europe sometimes? I would also love to hear what Nate thought about Paris and if you ate any snails while he was there.

Yeah, we could do a live podcast tape. All right. I'll just come out of pocket for that. Do it for Beth. I barely sold tickets. We had 300 people sold out in Paris. Unbelievable. It's crazy. Paris was awesome. Paris was – I was really excited about Paris. I always wanted to go, and I just thought it was like an awesome town. You're in that middle. It just feels so old and like –

It's because it is old. Everything there is like... The joke I have, everything's old, but everything's like a thousand years old. We went to Duluth, saw the Mona Lisa, and everybody... I had no idea that picture was so small. It's not as small as... Everybody says that. It looked like it in your picture. I know, but...

He was far back. No, but it's a good-sized picture. It's as big as this George Washington thing behind me. It doesn't look that big in the picture. It looks more like one of those little ones. You would think. That's what I thought. I thought it was going to be that small of a thing, but I think it was like that size. Everybody just says it looks small, and everybody says it's small. I don't know what everybody thinks it's going to be.

Well, that's what I would think. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I think that's what I thought –

I thought it felt like that. Maybe it's like framed. It's like in a window. Well, it's on a giant wall. Yeah. That's huge. Maybe that's it. There's no context to any of it. You're not allowed up near it. You're staying pretty far back. So when you take pictures and everything. But everybody just says it's small. That's like one of those things that you're like, everybody just says that. And you're like, I think we're all just saying it because that's what everybody says. And almost that's become more popular than. That's like when you go there, someone's like, if you say you want to go see Mona Lisa. Yeah.

I feel like they're like, eh, it's smaller than you think. Like, you know, it's almost like it's not worth it. You're like, no, no, I want to know that. Like, let me go decide if it's not worth it. I still, it's still Mona Lisa. You think that's the real one or that's a replica and they have the real one back in the back somewhere? No, I bet the best place to put the real one would be in front of everybody. Is this in a glass, is it in a glass case? Yeah. Yeah, there's guards. But I mean, I would think the best place to put the real one is that obvious of a place.

The back would I'd be more worried about because you're like, that's where people can get into it. Yeah. If you wrote a movie though, I'd have it in the back. Yeah. And go, it's not the real one. How do you know? How do you know? Yeah. Like you ever see the Mr. Bean movie? I think they messed up the, uh, Mona Lisa and he tried to repaint it. Yeah. Uh, good movie. Yeah. I remember those movies.

Thanks for jumping in, Derek. That's about all I had to say about Mr. Bean. I hate to break it to you. Mr. Bean's great. Andrew Copesy. My wife and I went to see Nate in London in 2023, and we're at the Manchester show this year. I think Nate's new hour is the funniest hour of stand-up I've ever heard, and what a surprise to have Greg and Mike on the show, too. Thank you so much for coming back to England and bringing some top Nateland comics with you.

uh thank you very much very very nice of you uh manchester was a awesome show they were fired up yeah how many people were that one uh eight hundred a thousand something like that oh wow uh yeah it was good london london was like two shows four thousand probably and then paris was the smallest at 300 two in dublin all the rest were probably 2000 2000 in oslo yeah it's crazy

Yeah, it's insane that people are there. You don't get used to it. You don't just walk out and go, you're just like, I can't believe anybody's even remotely here. But that Manchester show was awesome. They were on fire. That was a crowd. You could tape a special with that crowd. They were just fired up.

I mean, they all were, but it was like, they were, you know, I don't know how many people go out to Manchester. Maybe not. It's not, it's not London or it's not like whatever, but, uh,

Yeah, the show was great. Man, the show was cool. It was the least amount we got to spend in because we were not there long. But we walked around and stuff a little bit downtown. It was fun. How was the food? Yeah, food was all great. They get a tough review. We had fish and chips, and they were good. But we ate some good places. Nice. Yeah, I did not eat a snail in Paris. Okay. I tried to think. They have a big one. They have fried pig's blood, and they call it a...

It's black. They call it something. Yeah, you definitely shouldn't be eating that. I had a bite of it. It's called something else. And then Mike Vecchione ate it every morning. That's disgusting. Yeah. Yeah. Every morning. He's a health nut. He should see an exorcist, I think. Yeah. He's been different since he got back. Fried pig's blood every day. He's always slept upside down, but now...

Takes hot showers now. Yeah, he's the opposite. He doesn't even feel, it all feels hot to him now. You're like, nah, it's cold water, Mike. And he goes, nah, it's burning me. You're like, well, I think that's that. Fried pig's blood? Yeah, but it looks like a hockey puck. So I'm sure there's some other stuff in it. It gets worse as it goes along. Larbean Allen.

Mr. and Mrs. Bean's wife. Yeah. Or this was his sister. This was his sister. Laura Bean. Yeah. We all know Laura. My parents are on a trip to Ireland, and my mom texted us tonight to tell us that she had to take my dad to the hospital in Dublin for some health concerns. A doctor came in, and after examining dad, said he was interested to hear we are from Tennessee and asked if we had heard of Nate Bargetze. Nate did a concert in Dublin, and the doctor was there. I know that connection cheered my mom up.

Very, very nice. All right. Yeah. That's, you know, bringing, look at that. I'm glad they, yeah, and the doctor came to show. What's this? Black pudding. That's it. Yeah. That's what they called it. Gross. Yep. Yep.

Where was this? France? No, I think they did it. Where did they eat it the most? London. We were in London. They did it. But I think it's all Europeans eat this. Blood sausages. I don't know if they all eat it. Oh, yeah. I have heard that. Every European that's ever lived this would eat every morning. This is the only thing they eat is pig's blood. Wow. I had no idea. Yeah. I never heard anything like that. I have not either. But I have now.

Black, or Blake Brian Blackwell. We're talking about black pudding. B, B, B. This guy's got a lot going on here. There's a lot happening right there. I started 75 hard with Nate on February 3rd. Yesterday was day 75 and I finished 75.

Thanks, Nate, for your inspiration. Your three days of commitment to the program inspired me to go the distance. He lost over 15 pounds and did not have a single Sour Patch Kid the whole time. My body fat percentage dropped from 36% to 28%. This is basically my body. I could have had that body. And no happiness.

No, he's extreme. He's got the explanation points. Yeah, yeah. He's very happy. You think so? Black Byron's pumped. You think he's happy now? He feels great. Look at that. Well, he's happy now because he's done and he can eat those Sour Patch Kids. Yeah. Yeah.

Let's get that body of 5% back up to 36. This next guy's eating this. I was about to say, this next guy. This is what I would have been at. Yeah. Maybe I have Blake stand in for me. For your movie? No, for my donut challenge. Oh. He's closer. A fit figure for your stand in. Well, they do need one. What are they at? There's an ad in...

I assume in Atlanta. In Atlanta. Yeah. They said they need to, I needed a stand. They put like an ad saying, neighbor, I got you shooting a movie in Atlanta. So if you like, you know, if you want to be a stand in or something, looking for, it said fit. A fit figure. With silver hair. They did go pretty hard on my hair. But yeah. It was an. Everyone just says you're quitting standup.

Yeah. Okay. All right. Mike Perman. No, Brett Bacon, right? Brett Bacon. Wow, look at that. What a name. That's a good name. That is a good name. You know, and everybody's like, are you related to Kevin Bacon? And then he's got to be like, ah, it's a pretty common name. You go, is it Bacon? I'm curious on what y'all think of how they are now three dire wolf pups that have been born from old genetic material slash DNA.

The company claims this will help keep endangered animals from going extinct, but also they plan to bring back other species like the woolly mammoth and Tasmanian tiger. Where does the line between scientific advancement and playing with God's creation need to be drawn? This is the podcast for that answer. They're probably not doing it. They just told us that they did. Well, that's them. It's little dogs. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, it was the last 13,000 years ago since they were around the earth. I mean, where do they have the DNA from? They just throw out a lot of numbers. Yeah, but where are we the ones to draw the line here? Where does the line between scientific advancement and playing with God's creation need to be drawn? I'm just saying, I mean, aren't they talking about, yeah, the woolly mammoth, Tasmanian tiger? I don't think there's anything. If they have the things to bring back these animals, I don't think that...

You know, I mean, the woolly mammoth, that's kind of wild. Let's get a woolly mammoth. There was no reason they went extinct, right? Let's get a bunch of woolly mammoths up in here. Yeah. I'm excited for it. I want them to bring back the Tyrannosaurus Rex. That's what I want them to do. And just to see if it was ever real. Let's bring it back. Yeah.

It says the three dire wolves are actually gray wolves. Yes, that's what I'm saying. They're not even... They're a bit close. Okay, but where's the line drawn? We have machines that if you're dying and your heart is stopped, we will electrocute your heart and start it again. So how is that any different than creating another heart and creating... You're dead. You're gone. You're back. I said get rid of the machines. I support it. I think I got a point that's tough to argue. Yeah.

I say get rid of the machines. I'm with you. Your voice, I mean, you sound like an Alabama sports radio guy. All right, we'll be back with Auburn Rob on the phone. I've always said you missed me. Him and Alabama Bill are going to go out at about –

The matchup this weekend in the SEC baseball. Derek's true calling. At a Red Bay. We got War Eagle Eddie on the line. What's going on, War Eagle Red? This is your true calling. Do you think they should bring back the Dire Wolves? Because yours is slow? Because it's baseball. It's SEC baseball season. So you're like, you know, we're waiting until signing day before we can really get into things.

what isn't dire mean something like it's a nice and urgency yeah yeah yeah dire straight uh but you i always said derrick is a definitely a football coach i mean yeah the way he moves yeah you could just photoshop his body onto the side of a football field and you would be like that that fits yeah yeah we like talking about sports radio i mean bates always talk about sports radio uh

And, but we, I told him one, I just remember the, I was listening to the day. There's, did we tell the Keith, did I tell the Keith one with me and Keith Albers that we're on the radio morning radio a long time ago, maybe, uh, me and Keith Albers that we're on doing morning radio, uh,

at a restaurant promoting, I think our show at Zany's when we used to do a show together. Yeah. And then, so we're on the radio and then I remember we're just talking like this and then Keith goes, are we on the radio? Are we on the air? Are we on the air? And the guy goes, I don't know. I have a real moment of like, I mean, we were just all talking and he's like, Hey, are we on the air? He goes, I don't know. And then he just looks at it. And,

And then there is another one I heard. This guy is just talking and they, you know, you do an ad. So they go to put an ad in and, you know, so they, like Bates would do it. You just sneak it. He used to do it. They sneak it in, whatever. So they're just going on and on. They're talking about whatever. Then a guy goes, out of nowhere, they're talking about foreshadowing.

football. And out of nowhere, he goes, you like Long John Silvers? He goes, not really. He goes, well, they got a pretty good deal at Long John Silvers. And you're like, so what's an ad? And then he goes, well, that sounds pretty good. He had to change it. But he was so on another... He wasn't thinking about...

It was in the moment. It was just so funny. He goes, yeah, you like Lon Jon Silver's? He goes, not really. Well, they have a pretty good thing going right now. Three for one. And he goes, well, that sounds like a good thing. He has to get back into it now. It's live radio, so there's nothing you can do about it. Yeah, live radio. Don't just out of nowhere ask. I mean, I think I told it. I remember Lady...

And once I did a morning TV show, and it was a guy and a woman, and they were the two anchors. And the woman was gone, so the guy had his wife come.

And so she just sat in and filled in and she just wasn't good. And there, this woman's on there trying to sell jewelry, you know, like a morning radio shows, they bring something in and this woman's like, Oh, here's jewelry I got. And then she goes, and then the husband's like, Oh, would you, you know, you'd buy something like this. And she goes, no, I wouldn't. And you, and that was, and you're like, you go, just say you going to buy it. Yeah. She goes, I wouldn't. And they go, well, you would buy this. She's like, I'm not going to, I wouldn't buy this. We have this at home. You're like,

Like this woman, you're like, no one's going to make you do the transaction on A. Just say yes. Just say yes. Just say I'm going to buy this woman's stuff. And she was like, I'm not. And then she kept going. She kept saying I'm not. And I remember watching it. I was watching it live, just sitting there. And you could see the husband's like, all right. Just yelling at the teeth. Say it! All right.

Let's do Brett Bacon's question one more time. Brett Bacon! Dr. Katie Dieter. Dieter. Dieter. Dieter. My mother passed away, and I felt so much comfort when listening to Nate Land. Tonight I was listening to episode 109, Time, and Dusty says that he loved the movie Interstellar even though he doesn't believe it.

And Nate says, I don't believe in Jurassic Park. I laughed so hard and felt so happy. Nate's comment, coupled with Dusty cracking up laughing, and eventually agreeing with Nate, really made my whole week. Well, thanks for sharing that. I don't know why you say eventually. I don't know. I didn't listen to the episode, but I feel like I would agree with you right away. Her mom passed away, so maybe just let her have it. Okay. Good night.

Come on, Katie. What's your problem? Listen closer. Okay, I'm sorry, Katie. I'm sorry, doctor.

The fact that a doctor even listens to something you're on is impressive. Dr. Dieter. Sounds like your kind of doctor. Maybe a doctor could be, you go, I got a doctor. Sounds like Brett Bacon would be your patient. Yeah, Dr. Dieter. Who are you working on today? Brett Bacon. Trying to get into some Brett tofu, if you know what I mean. His wrestling name?

Are you ready to win Mother's Day and cement your reputation as the best gift giver in the family? Absolutely. Give the moms in your life an Aura digital picture frame preloaded with decades of family photos. Mm-hmm.

You know what? I like to read these sarcastically, but I do like Aura Frames. It is really good. I gave one – I'm not saying – but I like – it's fun to read it sarcastically. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I do like them. I gave one to my mom, one to my dad. Yep. And –

And I just put pictures on there, and it's really the only way they see their grandkids, and it keeps them up to date on what's going on. You should put pictures of your moms on your dads and picture your dads on your moms. Yeah, I should. Yeah, just to –

Yeah, just mix it up a little bit. Yeah, I should do that. And I, well, that's, I like to think I'm a good gift giver, but honestly, it's easy to be a good gift giver with Aura Frames. Aura Frames was named the best digital photo frame by Wirecutter, and it's easy to see why. It's not just pictures. You can upload videos up to 30 seconds long, and your favorite live iPhone photos will play right on the frame.

The embedded speaker can play audio on demand. Wow. So you can, you know, if you want your parents to hear something, you could put your, you know, say some stuff. Yeah. You know. It's a good way to break some news to them. Yeah. They're just watching, enjoying the photos and then boom, I dropped out of college. Yeah. You know, something like that.

Aura has a great deal for Mother's Day. For a limited time, listeners can save on their perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com to get $35 off plus free shipping on their best-selling Carver matte frame. That's A-U-R-A frames.com. Promo code NATE. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Malia Tate.

Malia. I'd say Malia. Malia Tate. Derek Stroop and I are living the same life. My birthday is the 24th of December. In the last two years, we've gone to Texas Roadhouse for my birthday.

What a life to share. Was it the Christmas episode you were saying you go to Waffle House? Yeah, yeah. Waffle House and Texas Roadhouse. I'm a huge fan of Texas Roadhouse. I can't remember which one I mentioned, but both of them are near and dear to my heart. Texas Roadhouse I talked about is like white people go to Mexican restaurants for their birthday and Hispanic people go to Texas Roadhouse and we both do it for cultural reasons.

We go to a Mexican restaurant because we want them to dance around us, throw a sombrero on our head. That's not what I do. Okay. All right. I'll turn this way. Okay. And then Texas Roadhouse, they go. So some woman named Tammy says yee-haw and throws peanuts at them. We're both doing it for the cultural reasons. So anyways, I thought that was a sharp observation. Fell flat. But-

yeah texas i feel like you just go because you that's that food i don't know like uh you go to like mexico for culture reasons i don't go to the well i'm saying okay okay not just cultural but for birthdays when i go to texas roadhouse it seems like hispanic families are celebrating birthdays when i go to mexican restaurants i don't see hispanic families you know clapping around cheese dip i will say my dad goes to a mexican restaurant near his house on his birthday yeah put the sabera on his house oh you left him out the

hang and your dad does it I said that's not why I go but my dad does it and then they put cake on your face yeah and they put it on your nose yeah and then you wipe it and you get kind of and then they'll do it again and they take a picture and everybody's like oh look at him it's a good time it is a good time they bring out fajitas you know I forgot about that you're right my dad

does do that yeah you turned that around yeah i did i did but that's a i mean that shows you kids you work hard yeah some stuff can still work out like that joke that's right uh

Is your birthday Christmas Eve? It is not. December 10th is my birthday, but we're both December babies there. All right. But yeah, me and Leo. Not necessarily the same life, though. Not the same. Yeah. Come on. I don't think everybody that goes to Texas Roadhouse is living the exact same life. Maybe. Is Texas Roadhouse where you throw the peanuts on the floor? Is that Logan's? No, no. Texas. Both of them. Both of them. Yeah. What's the difference in Texas and Logan's?

You know, I don't go to Logan's. I only go to Texas. What if I knew the exact difference? That'd be so... I'd go, one of them has a brown butter, and the other one's kind of a plain butter with the rolls. Get one that has cinnamon butter. Something right there. That's crazy. It is weird you go to a restaurant like that. They both got good rolls. I think Texas Roadhouse might have...

They remind me of O'Charlie's back in the day. You remember the O'Charlie's ones? I used to press them together. Did y'all ever do that with the Beast? He says it's crazy. O'Charlie's, it's unbelievable what they did to their roles. They were the best. They were. What did they do to them? O'Charlie's, and not everyone has O'Charlie's, but O'Charlie's had roles. And growing up, it was unreal, dude. They were the best roles I've ever had in my life. People would go to,

You're going there for the rolls. They bring you one basket. You'd be like, that's not enough. You go just bring... I might eat five of them. That's why they changed them. And then they changed them, I think, to cut cost. And they just are not good. Yeah. And so now it's like...

I mean, I'll even go and still get them. They have like the same... They look and feel like they're going to be the old ones. I wouldn't say they're bad. They're just not as good. I'm not saying they're bad. And I imagine once the me's of the world move on, we don't... They're going to be like, it's a long game. Yeah. And... But...

The younger generation that's going now doesn't even know. Oh, Charlie's is hanging on. Ruby Tuesdays, Applebee's, they took a dip. Oh, Charlie's is hanging on. I don't know. Why did Ruby Tuesdays take it? Why did nobody... The salad bar at Ruby Tuesdays should have never dropped off. Yeah. Yeah, I thought Ruby Tuesdays felt fancy to me. So I think that's why. I think we feel like we might have talked about this too before. It's the 250th episode. We've talked about everything. Yeah, we've talked about it. Yeah, 250th episode. But yeah, Ruby Tuesdays felt like a...

I don't think we went to that growing up. Like it was, that was a, no, no, I didn't either. I did it until later. Yeah. I was older. And then I found out about Ruby Tuesdays and I was like, Oh, I wish I would have known. But Shoney's is where the salad bar was. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Shoney's was a hotspot. Yeah.

It was. I went to a Shoney's in the middle of West Virginia not long ago, and it was still pretty hot. West Virginia, I got to say, Charleston, West Virginia, home, birthplace of Shoney's. Oh, I did not know that. Yeah, I used to, born in Charleston. A lot of my family lives in West Virginia. There's a Shoney's that was like the original downtown by the river, the Kanawha River. We used to go to it growing up. Loved Shoney's. A lot of core memories out of Shoney's. Yeah, I was at that Shoney's, and there was a guy that worked there. He was picking the loch.

on one of the game machines because they lost the key and I made a joke to him and he goes, yeah, they lost the key and now some of my lesser good qualities are coming out to help. Shoney's...

Headquartered here. Nashville, Tennessee. Wow. That's awesome. Never been in West Virginia. It was the first one ever not in West Virginia. No, it says that. Okay, I was about to say. Bowen Alley, Charleston. Yeah. Have I been allowed to? You speak big boy. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and I've seen the big boys. I have too. Such a good name, Shoney's. Their burger maybe still is called the big boy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Shoney's. They're still good. They're still going.

Yeah, they're hanging in there. They're fighting. That's a good way to put that one on Donald's bike. It's fighting. It's trying to hang in there. Yeah. Bonnie Paragoy. Has anyone noticed that Dusty says Bar-got-see, and yet Nate pronounces his own name as Bar-get-see. But in fairness, it probably should be Bar-got-see. I feel like everyone said Bar-got-see.

Nate Bargatze. I feel like that's what everyone says. I said that until I heard Nate pronounce his own last name. Bargetze. And so when he said Bargetze, I go, well, that's how I'm saying it. But I agree. I'm not so confident. No. You go the other way. Whatever Nate says, do the opposite. Yeah, Bargetze is probably how it should be. And then our southern accent has turned it into Bargetze.

I say it like with an A. Bargetzi. Bargetzi. Yeah, Bargetzi. So not even how she. So Bargetzi. That would be Bargetzi. Is what I should be saying. Yeah. Bargetzi. Bargetzi. Yeah. Someone gave me a way to say it, and I was like, oh, yeah, that's good, and I forgot. I'd like to tell someone. So it seems we're all a little confused. Go to a bar to get a Z. Yeah. Kind of petered out there in the end. I don't think that's the one. I should have thought that through. Yeah. Yeah.

Mike Gatzema. Mike Perman. Throughout the years of the podcast, I've heard you guys talk about your various comedy specials, which usually includes discussing the length of the special.

I was wondering if there is a target length you feel is ideal for a special and why? You know what? I've been saying the word ideal more. Have you? Yeah. And what reason? I don't know. I just, I've been, I don't know. I started saying it. Never said it ever. And I've been saying it a little bit more. Ideals, maybe like that. Feels good. It's like a taste of, you know, education. Could you use it as sentence? Not right now. Yeah. But...

I don't really know I'm going to use it till I'm there. Yeah. And then I'm there and I'm like, and then I use it. Yeah. And you can go ideally. Yeah. You know, that's, that's fun. I don't know. I don't go that. I've not done that yet. Yeah. Ideally. I'd like to. Ideally. Yeah. Yeah. That could be the next step. I think I would say ideally. And so then it's like. Ideally. Ideally. We're not going to go over there. The Bargetti family stays over here.

Yeah, I don't know. The length should be an hour. And it could all vary. It depends on when you're doing it. We do half hours. Half hours are great. 45, 50 is probably a good amount too. I like an hour nine. That's what I like. Yeah, I like 20. Yeah. I think it's, yeah, 20. I mean, it all just varies. Again, this is the thing we talked about earlier.

It really depends. I think if you're putting a special out, you're trying to grab the audience and they don't know you, it's like, I don't know if you necessarily need to put out an hour

but that's why we had, we have the showcase. You see comics that are doing eight minutes and then some hopefully go to half hours, then hours. And you go until you want to start seeing more from that comedian. But so, yeah. Uh, so it can, it can all, you know, it all just depends. Uh, but you're where you should do it. I think an hour is good. Uh,

rough somewhere in that world yeah i think so i actually like like 59 because it's an hour but when you see the time it looks less than an hour i agree that i think it should be but i did mine's my thing my new one's like an hour nine because i don't know what to cut i like all the jokes yeah yeah too good all the jokes yeah no hour nine is is uh uh flex

because you could stop at an hour and you've really fulfilled it, but another nine minutes of joke, joke, joke, joke, joke, joke. You're like, I had an overflow, and I didn't dislike any of them. Yeah. That's nowhere to put it. Yeah. And when they're all funny, it works perfect. That's what I'm saying. But that doesn't work for everybody. So I agree with Nate, since I know y'all get a lot of questions about what I think about this. But I agree with Nate on it does depend on the comic, too.

If they're seeing you, I mean, some comics would benefit from just doing a 30-minute special or 45-minute special or whatever. I think if someone's telling you to do an hour, I think ideally, man. That's good. That's where you would... Come on, man. Look at that. Ideally, you would...

do i said 52 sounds good yeah i was like some of our specials that we're making you know it's like you like that 48 i can be talked into 52 feels like doable if someone that can do an hour you're like let's just make it a nice tight yeah that's a good point and then the half hour it's like yeah you'd be under under a little bit yeah 27 is nice

That's 27 minutes special. It feels like, again, yeah, I think people want to watch that. And when, yeah, if something's over an hour, sometimes in your head, mentally, you go like, like you think, I don't know if I want to invest in that much time. It's like a whole movie. Weirdly enough, even though if someone says, yeah, it's 52 minutes, you're like, I was just looking at, listening to some podcasters the other day.

And it was like, it's 44 minutes. And I was like, oh, yeah. I was like, you want to listen to that. We've had that with this podcast. We thought people want to go like, oh, I'll do that. And there's another one I saw was four hours. You're like, well, I'm not...

gonna like it feels like it never ends and ours is two we tried to go down i don't think i've come back up ever listened to a full joe rogan podcast because it's like three hours i'm like i never at least no you would i think people listen it's either yeah people are seeing clips so there's or they listen to it over a week or if you're like yeah yeah i think that's what it is or if you're working and you don't have to

You can listen to whatever you want. And if you listen to Joe's whole podcast, you wouldn't have time for an ice bath. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's true. That's what it's about. Yeah. It's about getting to that ice bath. Yeah. Do you do ice baths? I don't. No, I bet he does. I can't handle the cold. Do you have to? I couldn't have put the sarcasm on any thicker. No, I was joking. Oh, then I missed yours. Sorry. Yeah. I can't do it. I said Derek does it because he has to because he's to cool himself down.

he was been doing it for a few years no before it was he just because now he runs hot yeah oh yeah oh yeah you get it no i get it okay all right okay i thought that was a pretty solid fun yeah

That's fun. No, yeah, the ice bath, sir. I've done it, but it does. I'll tell you what, you get out of it, you feel terrific. You really do feel you have the most energy. I get the idea of it, but it's hard to get in it. They say your body feels like it's going to die when it's in an ice bath. So when you get out, you get this endorphin rush because you lived. And I don't know if that's good for you.

Yeah, well, I think you decide for you and other people decide for other people. But I'll share an opinion though. Yeah. I just, because I think it can't be good for your body to think it's going to die all the time.

Yeah, I agree with that. That's not why I do it. I don't... I'm not going to... You do do it. No, I don't. I would never take an ice bath because I hate cold water and I've hated cold water like everybody my entire life. We have charities where people jump in the water to raise money for fundraisers because cold water is so terrible. Yeah. So if I can find other options...

you'll catch me walking, drinking smoothies or trying salads before I jump into an ice bath. Yeah. Uh, that'd be last resort. If I go, I can't get fired up and they go, well, this is the only option, but I, uh, yeah. I told you ice bath worked like a Zimpy. You don't think you would jump in. They,

They go, the longer you're in there, it's like you just start toning up. Yeah. I tried Ozempic for like three months and lost nine pounds, and that was it. My doctor was like, you're the only person that's ever beat Ozempic. He's like, we're not really – I'm not joking. He's like, we're not getting anywhere, and he's like, you don't really – we're not seeing the results that we – You're gaining weight on it. Yeah, yeah. He was like – and I was lying to him. He's like, is your eating habits changing?

Because I wouldn't eat all day. Then at night, I would catch up with everything. Yeah. But anyways, yeah. You lost nine pounds. Yeah, yeah. Three a month? That's not... Yeah, I mean, I guess. I mean, I could have done that probably. I think it's supposed to be more than three a month. Yeah. Everybody else seen it. It's supposed to be extreme. Extreme. Oh, gosh, what happened? Yeah, I mean, look at Billy Gardell. I mean, yeah. I mean, everybody that has had those NPIC, look, I mean, it looks like, you know,

I mean, they have lost a lot. I mean, nine pounds in three months. He gave up on me. He was like, you can keep- Billy Gardell looks like an oil baron or whatever now. I feel like he has a mustache and he's real thin. Yeah, he does. I mean, good for him. I'm sure he feels great, but-

Yeah, I mean, but he does. He looks like an oil tycoon or something. Yeah, yeah. Well, to take it and not work is pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. Talk about it on stage. Not on stage yet. Yeah, yeah. I'm definitely... You should start talking about it. Maybe Ozempic will send you some money to kind of show you. Yeah. Yeah. No, they go, we got a dose of the work, Bubba. You're going to hear from a goby. I like that. Give us a shot. People donate to charity if you jump in the cold water. I like to think that there are people with so much money, they're like, yeah, I'm going

I could just give it on my own. Yeah. But I want to see the poor people jump in the cold water. And we'll call it a polar plunge. Yeah, go jump in the cold water and then I'll donate some money. Go run over. But it is for a good cause. I've done a polar plunge. Yeah. But the money could be donated without you having to jump in the water. It does make it more fun. Everything, but I think it's like, yeah, it's a weird kind of thing. Charities, that's why it's kind of, charities are tough because it's like, yeah, you're doing a bunch of stuff that could be

Yeah, you're like, just give the money. Like, I don't know, you know. The challenges, where you're doing all the challenges. Like, I think a challenge is probably going around again. Ice bucket challenge, I think is going around again. Yeah, it's like, you know. I mean, it's like the young people could do that. But the ones that we did it the first time, you're like, I'm not doing it. You're not challenging ice bucket again. Nah.

You're like, this is a new. Get a new thing. It's got to be more extreme. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Boiling water challenge. McDonald's hot coffee challenge. Yes. Oh, that'll be a good one. Alex Tucker. My wife and I were at the early show taping for Tennessee Kid. We got there just as the opening comedian told his last joke and exited the stage, only to come back out and be cut off by a production team member mid-joke.

I now know that the opener was none other than Breakfast Bates himself. Are there any other production-related issues or problems worth noting that you guys have had to navigate doing stand-up? You had helicopters. Yeah, yeah. The helicopter thing on my other special that was for real. I mean, the helicopters came. I don't know. It's like, yeah, yeah. You just have like... You could have... Some is like...

I mean, you do get called off stage like that or, you know, you might have to. I think I've only done it like once or twice where I've repeated a joke, maybe in a taping where I didn't set it upright. Then I kind of said it again. But I only did that maybe once. But I've been very early to like my live at Gotham or something.

That one, it was very, it was something like a fan was blowing something in the background. You were about to walk out. Yeah. And they sent you back out there. Yeah. It was something very simple. I, uh, I one time on stage was telling a joke and, uh, nobody was going with me.

And I could tell that there was like some talking that kind of started in the crowd. And I got upset and I started to kind of not like really turn against the crowd, but note that they were not liking the joke and how they were in the wrong. And I kept rambling and eventually somebody in the front row went, there is somebody having a seizure in the audience. And I was up there going, and that's why I'm trying to tell her. And they are just emergency crews. And I mean, I had missed everything.

completely what was that that's one that i always remember and i was opening for burke chrysler in arena and my mic went out um and i just tossed the mic down and had to yell the rest yeah well it's the perfect two that come out of cut his mic yeah yeah i did show him bowling alley i might have told it on here but with uh opening and uh

We were performing in front of the bowling lanes. I was opening for Big J years ago right outside Detroit or something. And so you perform. They had bowling going on at the other end and comedy going on this far other than where we were at. So you just hear bowling. Yeah. And then so the stage is up. I'm on stage. Light goes out. So now I'm in the dark. So the guy's got to go get a ladder to climb up to hook the light back up. Well, the ladder couldn't be farther. It's a big bowling alley.

Ladder is so far away. So he goes and gets the ladder. So I'm doing 25, 30 minutes. 20 minutes, I'm just in the dark. So you just have to figure that out. He puts the ladder up there, gets it, turns the light on, comes back on.

Takes the ladder back to where it belonged. Comes back. Light goes out again. I mean, last probably, I do probably five more minutes, light goes back out. And you see him go, he's got to go get that ladder. And I remember just thinking like, just leave the, let's maybe just leave it over here. Leave it set up. Leave it set up. And then I had to sit. And so my set, my 30-minute set, three minutes of it was in light. Holy cow. And the rest of it was non-light. So yeah, you deal with that stuff.

And you just got to, that's stuff to figure out. Yeah, that is. Back-to-back weekends in Huntsville where lights went out.

At the club, lights went out. I did my last 30 minutes in the dark. And following week, I was with you and you in Huntsville. Oh, that's right. And the lights – then the fire alarm went off and the lights came on while Julian was on stage. Yeah. Just kept going. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he handled that great. Yeah. I was in Detroit a couple weeks ago and doing a show. It may not have been going great. And the guy sitting right down front pulls a book out. Oh. And then I see him open it. Oh.

Are you reading? I haven't even heard of that. He pulled a book out? Yeah. He pulled a book out and he opened it.

That's the only way Brian's audience, the age they're at, they know how to... They tell them to get off phones the old way. So you can't read. Because they're old school. It's all older people. Get off your book. There you go. You better not pull that newspaper out. You better not pull that newspaper out. A book? Yeah. So you said, are you reading? I said, are you reading? And people did laugh at that. And he flipped it over, and it was your book.

big dumb eyes. And then I said, get the, uh, I don't know. Tell me. I think I might know. And then I said, well, why were you? Cause he was writing something. He said, you're mentioned in the book.

And I was like, oh, really? What did it say? It was just nothing. Like, we do a podcast together or whatever. But it was Daniel Rucker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think Daniel told me. His childhood friend. Yeah, who's in the book. I talk about Daniel in the book. Smartest friend of yours. Smartest friend of mine. So did he pull out the book to get your attention? He was making a note while he was thinking about it. Oh, okay. He wanted me to sign it there. Gotcha, gotcha. Yeah. Yeah. Very smart guy. I think just, yeah, not intentionally, but like...

Yeah, doing it to honestly, probably honestly make a note. Yeah, yeah. That makes perfect sense. But he could tell Brian needed something to go on. He helped me. I'll say that. Yeah, yeah. He goes...

But yeah, so I know I said not great at segues. And I didn't read it for it. Yeah. Yeah. Taking notes. Yeah. Dusty. Yes, Brian. What if I told you the most important part of your spring cleaning routine is your sock drawer? You got a good sock collection going? Yeah. I'm into socks. Yeah. Well, it's time to ditch any mismatched tired pair and refresh your collection with some fresh Bombas.

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I don't get it. We're talking about school. We're about to talk about school. And he went to school with this guy. Yeah, but school with Daniel Rucker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. You all seem to go, yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. We were just talking about Daniel Rucker in the book and that he went to school with him. Okay. I didn't know that you mentioned that you went to school with him. Maybe I did it. No, you did. Okay.

We're taking over from here, Dusty. Everybody welcome Dusty Slade. Dusty Slade's watching it like y'all guys are watching it. A few weeks ago while you were out, Dusty mentioned that in school he played Foursquare and Aaron ridiculed him saying, what are you, from the 1920s? Yeah. But people came to Dusty's defense saying, no, kids still play Foursquare. Aaron didn't go to the same kind of school I went to. No. He went to...

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty high level. Yeah. School. Yeah. Where they probably didn't do four square, but he watched, he would watch the help do four square. Yeah. So. Exactly. It's, we do, we do, I did four square. My daughter still does four square. I said, I learned it from Harper. Yeah. I didn't know. I was about, I have played with you and Harper four square. Yeah. That's, that's great. I think it was that same weekend. Yeah, it was. Huntsville. Yeah. You know who loves four square? Nick Novick. Wow.

Wow. Yeah. Yeah.

Loves it. Were you a big game player growing up, Derek? Yeah, of course. All the, all the, you know, the classics. I mean, I feel like most of them were banned in school. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, all the classics sounds like a response from a guy that didn't play. Yeah. Yeah. All the, you know, class. I mean, I talk about, I talk about this on stage, so I'm trying not to, I mean, dodge ball, all those games. It'd be nice if you had something. I,

I loved it. I mean, especially, you know, back then, we didn't need much to entertain ourselves. And our, like, friends weren't broke up into social classes. Like, you didn't have to have a certain electronic to hang out with somebody. We just, if you were all in the cul-de-sac at 6 p.m., you could play the game. So there was, like, you know, I mean, there's so many games. Freeze tag, dodgeball. Kickball. Jackpot. Were you the roller in kickball? Um...

Yeah, I would be sometimes. I feel like you would be... Like a power roller. Yeah, it was obvious Derek's team would be the roller. All-time quarterback. I think you would...

be the one organizing a lot of the games. Oh, absolutely. And also, I mean, I played a lot of these fun games, but I loved like the core game. Like I loved basketball and football and baseball. And so some of these other games, I mean, I might've, I mean, tug of war. Y'all remember tug of war? I mean, at my school tug of war was huge. Yeah. That's from like the Romans did tug of war. Uh, um,

Say it and I'll bet I'll come to me. Describe it. Yeah. Well, you had like at the end at our school, you have like the big loop. Yeah, the anchor. The heaviest guy in the class. Yeah, everybody. Not at your... This isn't like at your... Harvest Alabama. Everybody. Everybody knows. Tug of War at everybody's school had that loop at the end and I was the anchor. When I got into the loop, we'd like at the whole school, like in the gym, you go...

And they go, they go, Miss Thomas' class. Miss Johnson's class. And we go, ah!

And then you'd go out there, and I would step into the loop. When I got into the loop, because I was a big kid, I don't have to sell y'all on that, and I would pull the loop up. The gym would go nuts. Yeah. Because, I mean, I'd get settled into it, and I was fixing to drag Miss Johnson's class. By yourself. No, these kids, I mean, I'd be, I mean, backing them down. Tug of War was like, that's a core memory for sure. So you won a lot?

Oh, I won. There was one other guy, David Brown. And when me and David Brown, when Miss Cantrell's class, Miss Thomas class, he was twice my size. But I would get lower and use my leverage. He was just a lot bigger than me. And he would just kind of let the weight kind of hold on. And I'd try to fight again. I'd try to use my leverage to kind of pull. But when you would watch the kids all collapse on each other, and I would look at all the, I mean, I felt like a Roman glad. I'd go, ah!

And they'd all look back at me. Ah!

I mean, it was the best. I want David Brown to come. He's huge. He won for Alabama Crimson Tide. He won a rib-eating contest at the Music City Bowl in Nashville in 2005. Okay, that's a credit. Wait, did he play for them? Yeah, he was a walk-on at Alabama's offensive line. All the Brown kids. There was four of them. And that's the thing he's known for? That might be his biggest credit still. Yeah, yeah. No, but they were playing Minnesota. And, yeah, he won the rib-eating contest. But anyways...

Did you go down there and see him? I think I might have. I like to picture you were the size you were, I'd picture just your whole life. Yeah, pretty close. The height has, I've been built like this. I mean, I was always the biggest kid for a long time. But yeah, tug of war, that brought, sorry, I got fired up. I love that the audience would cheer for you when you put the loop on it. Oh man, I mean, I would pull it up around my waist and...

I mean, the kids, I mean, I can remember the pandemonium. What grade is this? This is like fifth grade, third, fourth, fifth, like right in there. Yeah, for sure. They loved it. Oh, man. It was the best. David Brown ate 16 ribs in three minutes. Wow. You know what's so great is that you fact check this immediately. And, you know, and that is, isn't that impressive? It is.

The world we live in that we have Google? Yeah. So David Brown. Yeah, because he had to slow down. So David Brown would beat you at tug of war now. Yeah, he would. I mean, his brother, Dawson Brown, also played for Alabama. The Browns were all just giant kids. Their dad was a big dude. And then their mother, Beth Brown, was a tiny, tiny woman. But they were all, since we were little kids. You go over to their house growing up, their pantry had snacks. I mean, it looked like a Costco in there. Just huge kids, huge humans still.

What was the one game? Jackpot? What did you say? Jackpot. Jackpot. What's that? You take the ball and you throw it into a group and you go 500. And then whoever catches it got 500 points. And then you throw it and you go jackpot. And whoever catches the jackpot gets to be the thrower now.

Y'all never played jackpot? And then why would you want to be the thrower? I think that just means you've won. You're the king of the castle. What if you never say jackpot? Do you just get to throw the rest of the time? You just keep throwing it, yeah. Yeah. And I'm probably missing some of the details on this. And would you just make up the points? Yeah. Is there any system? No, there's really not a system. You go one million. But then when you say jackpot, I mean, the ball could be in the air. I could shove Brian to the ground. Yes, you could. And grab the ball. Yeah. Yeah.

You're just waiting on that jackpot. I'm waiting on that jackpot. You wouldn't even bother to catch it for the points. Yeah, I mean, I guess you would. Just kind of like, you don't remember how... Warm up. Because who's keeping track? Only you're keeping track of yourself's points. Yeah, but I'm just competitive to the point to where I would just want to catch every one of them. Yeah. Might as well. Did you separate anyone's shoulder in Red Rover? No, I didn't separate anybody's shoulder in Red Rover. But, I mean, I was a physical kid. When you were running, though...

At somebody's hands. They let loose a little bit. You know they did. You know they did. It never mattered where you ran. No. You just ran straight. Yeah. And I mean, this is where I accelerate. Y'all remember the fitness test we used to have to take?

That's what really exposed me. I was an athletic kid. Presidential. Pull up, sit up. I mean, there's nothing more embarrassing than being stuck. I mean, you know, where you shake and you're stuck. You know what I mean? But no, I was an athletic kid. I was running around out there tackling kids, you know, having a good time. Yeah. I bullied the bullies back in the day. You know, that's how I was. Yeah.

Yeah. Did y'all like school? You went to school in Alabama, right? Well, you moved there? Yeah, yeah. I went from West Virginia, second grade, and then I moved to Alabama in the third grade. And it was quite the difference. The first day I came home, my mom said I was crying. And I told her that they wanted me to bring my lunch in a sack. And I thought a sack was a pillowcase. And I didn't understand what they were asking, just learning the Southern language a little bit, you know.

But yeah, I didn't like, I love the social part of school. It's very relatable to Nate and how I struggled. I went to summer school every summer of high school. Really? Every one of them. Yeah. And see, I would imagine, I'm just picturing you walking in with a pillowcase full of food and it looks full. It's not some little, it's not like, it's not like what you think it would be. Mom, he said bring it. It's like Santa Claus. You come in and go, all right.

I mean, I'll bring my food in. I love that the guy when in tug of war is in summer school every year. I mean, I love that. Yeah. You're like, oh, you're in tug of war. That's your time. Yeah. Not in the classroom, but in tug of war. Oh, King. It's a price you got to pay. Yeah. To be good at tug of war. Yeah. The Eagle be doing school all year round. You know what I mean? I needed an extra month every summer to learn math. Yeah. Everybody got it during the school year. They needed to. Yeah. I needed to hang out a little longer.

What was your clothes game? Carhartt? You know, I was a little preppy back in the day. Like, country preppy, but like... Tucked in. Well, you look snappy. Tommy Hilfiger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had some Tommy. I was definitely wearing... Nautica. Some... Yeah, I wore boots.

jeans, polos, kind of the preppy country look. What was some of the stuff? The belt with the loop. Oh, braided belt? Braided belt that hangs down. I would never in a million years have a braided belt that hangs down. I had a braided belt for a time, but never hanging down. Mine did. I had a braided belt, but never hanging down. Mine hung down. No, not a chance. But I'm older. Yeah, true. Yeah, but mine really hung. Huh? Yeah. Yeah.

They didn't even have braided belts when he went to school. We braided them. They ain't got that far. But it's the, yeah, we would, yeah, mine, you would put a loop through it and let it hang down for a little bit. We had one clothing store in Lebanon, Goodies, and you go there and there's a good chance you show up for school. I remember Goodies. There's going to be a bunch of people wearing the same thing. Yeah. Did you go to a shoe carnival?

I don't know. Okay. I know that I went to Bugle Boy Outlet when that came around, and we had a Duck Head Outlet. That was when I felt very fancy. Duck Head, I just talked about them. That's a good little store. Yeah. That was like a fancy. Probably went to Shoe Carnival, but I don't, I mean, wherever, you know, I would get like one pair of shoes a year. Shoe Carnival used to do the wheel where you could win. Yeah, you could go in and there'd be like this money blowing in the little box. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, never went there.

Yeah. It was like a car. It's exactly what it says it is. I wore a lot of American Eagle. Oh, American Eagle. Yeah. Yeah. American Eagle. That's money, right? When I got to high school and got a job, I had some American Eagle. American Eagle, it's not Abercrombie. Yeah. If you had Abercrombie, it was like... Mm-hmm.

they didn't make abercrombie for people built like me no no no they really didn't no like the jeans the thighs they had a certain size yeah the abercrombie was like i feel like the the kids that have some money american eagle was like you're in between where you're you know you had still getting it at the mall you still get them all this is at the mall yeah so no one's doing great bugle boy is not at the mall no no i'm

I'm saying that's strip mall. Yeah. Regular mall is where you're getting some good stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So strip mall is where it's like, and it's true. Mall's different now, but back then it was, I feel like I wore American Eagle to some TV tapings. Yeah. Like even like, that's what I thought when I would do TVs, like, well, I need to go buy something from American Eagle. Cause it, so it looks nice. And then I think I do remember going into Abercrombie much later in life. Cause I was like,

you know, wanted to go. Cause I never could go. And then that song came out. And then I find out they don't have, then they, I'm like, y'all got 32s. And they're like, nah, 34s or whatever. They're like, beat it. You remember the song? I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch. Yeah. Yeah. And they'd come play a tuba as you walked out.

Wow. Ain't that crazy? That is crazy. Yeah, but you grew up in Nashville, a little fancier here than... Yeah, where did you grow up? I grew up outside of Huntsville. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Outside of Huntsville is still pretty country. Oh, Harvest is for sure. 20 years ago, for sure. What year did you graduate? 04. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

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Did y'all, like, we still had chalkboards. Yeah. Did you transition to whiteboards? Yeah, for the most part. By 04, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm a 2000 graduate, and we didn't have any really chalkboards. I think there was one. I think the science teacher had a whiteboard and a chalkboard, but that was it. Everybody else had the whiteboards. I went to, I grew up in a school that had corporal punishment.

So we got paddled and we would get paddled even in the hallways. We got paddled all the time. You get paddled for your shirt being untucked, for having, for chewing gum, for running in the hallway. If you were an athlete that was late to class, you would get paddled. Paddle happy. I mean, a very strict school. I mean, our administrators did not play games. I don't mind a little paddling, but that seems too much.

Yeah, I mean, one time I was late for class, I had on wind pants. And he was like, Stroop, you know that's three licks. He's like, we can do it right here in the hallway. And I go, Coach, I got on wind pants. And he goes, I know what wind pants are.

And he gave me three. I mean, I was bruised all the way down my legs. I think the idea was just that it's always around. I think that it wasn't a matter of what you can speak for. It's the threat of it always around. That just seems like too much. I know, but you're just like, it's just always around. It's the order in the school that we're going to, you just...

You never know. It's like getting a speeding ticket. All the cops, you're like, yeah, you can speed, you can run this light, but you might be getting a ticket here and there. So you just- What if they were like, ticket or paddling? See, I think if you were fighting in school, a paddling would be good as opposed to being suspended. Yeah. Because all suspended does is send you home and you get zeros on your stuff. I'd be into that. When I got suspended a couple of times, I would have taken paddling.

Yeah. But late to class, let's take it easy. No, very, very strict high school. Yeah, but they would just show up on time. And so I was going to say this. Yeah, but there's other, I mean, I don't know. I don't get licks for being late. I know, but you're a guy that's been suspended twice, so you're, we're just, this is, you're already gone. Stay out of this one. Yeah. You're already, yeah. Yeah.

To you, you're like, showing up on time was not even, you don't even consider that nice to do. You're like, that's not even in our, we're in a trailer park. Your bus is probably late anyway. Yeah. Because y'all, we're probably late to pick you guys up, right? How late were the bus to go to the trailer park? Was it always late? I don't know. I don't even know. I don't even know if we had time. You know what I mean? Like, do we even have watches? I don't know. Yeah. This sounds like someone that, yeah, you were probably a pretty big problem in the school. Yeah.

Paddling never sent anybody the other direction, though. I've never heard anybody be like, well, Tim was a pretty good kid, but you know they paddled him a bunch in high school when he got into drugs. It helped the people that it should help, but they figured me out. They had to smoke me out. So I would come in there and ask for a paddling every time. I'd go, just give me a paddling. And eventually they'd go, no, you're going to write this report.

And you're going to go to detention and we're not giving you an option for paddling because it doesn't work. And that's what you want. So they learned that isolating me and making me do these things drove me crazy because I wanted to get back to the show. There's third period. Amanda's in there and I got some more zingers to send. And so if you could just paddle me and we can get this over with, I can get out of here. And they put an end to that.

And we're like, no, no, no. We're going to. And once they started sending me to once they started to isolate me, I was they had they had me in a headlock. I could not handle that because I wasn't a bad kid. I just was not going to miss the I was going to do what was funny, regardless of how. Yeah, I would agree. These paddling doesn't.

It doesn't make you do drugs, but it does show you which kids do do drugs. It's a way to know that's who's getting paddled. Yeah.

Is that, is that, I mean, like, but do you think it helped people? Like you think there were people that would have done drugs had they not gotten the paddlings? No, I think they just got in trouble. I don't think that the drugs had anything to do with it. I think that it taught us like respect and accountability and consequences. Like for me, it taught me that if I was, if I didn't follow the rules, then there was, there was consequences. And so for me, I think it was great, but I handled it, you know, uh,

Uh, I think having that the type of administrators we had worked out for me, they made me walk a tighter line than I ever would have, would have walked. So I, I do like it. I wish, you know, my kids one day I would not be against. They used to call my mom. It'd be the quickest phone call you'd ever seen in your life. They go, Hey Stacy, thank you. And they wouldn't even have to ask her. She'd go wear him out. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's yeah. Everybody would. Yeah. Everybody could paddle everybody back in there. Yeah.

But this is not even that far back. They weren't doing that in high school. Same state. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But... Well, was yours a private school? No. Public. No. Oh. No. Well, it was yours. Public. Public, yeah. Yeah, they probably would have paddled me for that haircut. I was going to say, I'd like to think the paddling made some difference. You know what I mean? Yeah.

What'd you get suspended for, Dusty? Fighting one time and well, I got, you know, a girl stabbed me with a pencil and I had pushed her head before that. So I got an in-school suspension. I don't know if you know how to tell a story, but you start with you pushing her head and then she stabbed you. Well, it even, she stole something from me. I'll see you again. I don't think you know how to tell a story. Because now we're getting two. Well, alright, so that's it. She stole something from me. I went to get it

I tried to get my hand in her desk. She pinched me, so I pushed her head, and then I went and sat down. I never got the thing. And then she came back there, and I stood up, and she stabbed me three times with a pencil. Where? Once in the arm and twice in the back. And this is where lead poisoning is number one. This is your— This is a number two pencil. Yeah. This is— Back then, you think about lead poisoning like you think about cancer.

You're like, this is how you're going to die is lead poisoning. Like the last thing you want is to ever get lead poisoning. And then when the teacher came back, I said, I stood up and I said, she just stabbed me. And I went to end school suspension for a day. And then I never saw her again. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. That ended dark. Yeah. Ended great for me. Yeah. Yeah.

You made some calls and got rid of her. No, I didn't do anything. But I think there's a threshold. And there were a couple other guys in my class that were like, yeah, she stabbed us today too. But they didn't say anything. See, I'm like, oh, no, you're not going to be stabbing me in here. Yeah, and not say anything. There's a lot I'll put up with, but not stabbing. Yeah. And so, yeah, I think enough people were like, yeah, she stabbed us today too. They were like, we got to send her to a different school. Mm-hmm.

One where they allow stabbing. Yeah. One where so much stabbing is going on that's not even an issue. Where they go, how is she? They go, she's good. They go, she doesn't stab anybody. She goes, no, no, no. That's what the old school they're sitting in, they have to say, she's not stabbing people. No, no, no. Why would you think that? I don't think anybody's ever done that. She's a great girl. I'm glad you guys have her. I imagine they have to call and trick them into taking her.

Would y'all get excited about back to school supplies? Loved it. Stuff like Trapper Keeper. All of them. Loved it. Do you have a Trapper Keeper? Oh, for sure. Ones with cool baseball that was on fire. Oh, yeah. Like this kind of thing. Boom. Look at that. Classic. I can smell the cigarette smoke on that thing. It's still in good shape.

This has got... Look at this. If you're listening, Dusty brought his Trapper Keeper. Yeah. Look at that. Still in good shape. The rings hold up. Still in good shape. Trapper Keepers really helped. I mean, organization-wise, it's tough to beat. You can just stuff everything in it. Yeah. Close it, and we're gone. And you're cool.

School shopping for clothes was like the most exciting thing ever. I had some stickers on it. What do you keep in there now, Dusty? This is a letter from the mayor of Chattanooga. I saw that. Is that the only thing you got in there? Yeah. And some other stuff. Crackers? Well, I meant to bring this one time, and then I never did because the mayor of Chattanooga wrote me a letter, and it was very funny. Yeah. We talked about it, but then I never brought it. What did you say you got excited about shopping for clothes? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was the best. You'd have your outfit laid out the night before. It just...

so fired up i mean i cared a lot about what i looked like in in school even if i was you know even if it was like a flannel jeans and boots i didn't like wrinkled clothes or anything like that yeah i didn't like that either this is exciting did you ever have one of these triangular rubber oh of course man there's a lot cooler options than that that was those are cool though by 2004 you probably had more other options but

I was all in the 90s. What year did you graduate? 2000. Did you play Pitzel Break?

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry. That's a dumb question. Did you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're probably better at it than I was. No, I bet y'all's pencils back when you were in school were tough. That's real oak. That's real oak. By the time mine got, mine was probably, you know, a bunch of particles, but yours, you could have built a boat out of y'all. Real deal. Yeah. Go for wood. Yeah.

Go for wood. They'd watch a tree disappear. Did you do some pencil fighting? Oh, yeah. I got kicked off the bus for throwing. I was about to say the bus was a good pencil fighting. So you're fine with throwing them. Yeah. Because that could poke someone's eye out. Yeah. Well, I think that's why they kicked me off the bus. I mean, I got to come back, but I had to be a week off the bus, which was really just a punishment for my mom. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah. That's so true. So you're still blaming the school somehow, though. Yeah.

yeah well everybody threw pencils you know it's like i just got caught yeah

We like to sit. I like to sit. When I was a younger kid, like really young, we would sit in the back of the bus. And I remember one day we would sit right there and we were flipping people off in the cars behind us. Yeah, out the back. Yeah. That was really fun. There was some older girls in a car one time. And I remember they started laughing and they flipped us off back. And it was really fun. We had a great time with it. Yeah. That's like getting a trucker to roll the horn. Yeah. The back of the bus was a whole different game. Your kids go out to walk a...

fine line with, I feel like, because they're, you grew up pretty wild. Yeah. But then they're going to be raised to be, don't be doing that stuff. Or you think you would let your kids do this? I like to let them get a little wild. A little wild. Yeah. Yeah. But they're, I feel like you're my, my parents, or I would be raised by you. Yeah. Would have been like, if my parents grow up, yeah, they go from,

Being probably a little wild to the most Christian. Yeah. And I feel like that's how you... Yeah, I mean, I want to keep them within... I want them to be respectful. Yeah. But I like to let them get a little wild. For sure. I like to let them run around, jump on stuff. Yeah. Get into it, dig in the dirt. Yeah. You ride the bus? Flick off...

Well, I hope they're not like that. Yeah. I don't know where I learned that from, but I hope they are not like that. Well, to Dusty's credit now, he did the Kid Rock show a few years ago, and they did a group photo at the end where everyone flipped the camera except Dusty. Yeah. There's like 12 people. I don't like that either. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. People tell you to do that all the time, and you're like, no. Yeah. I used to always, you know, I was like, I like was annoyed that I had to say no. You're like, why are you making me feel bad? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

School bus? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I rode the school bus. I thought it might have been because your dad was the teacher there some, right? Yeah. So when I went to DuPont Elementary, I'm trying to think if we rode the school bus. I rode my bike to school.

in junior high that's not a ton of school bus but i i rode it so really but i were right yeah we were an old hickory so i went to dupont i mean when i went to cooper town which a girl came to my show and uh i don't remember his i think maybe dublin or london i don't remember exactly but somewhere in europe and she went to my cooper town in springfield wow i was there from second to fourth grade she had my dad as a teacher that's where my dad was a teacher my dad was the paddler

So he was the one. So the kids, he had them all sign the paddle. He was the punisher. Because I always think like, you know, kids would be like, you know, no one wanted to get paddled by my dad. You're like, well, I'm, you know, I'm in it. I'm in it with him. Yeah. Yeah.

But he had a big wooden paddle in Robinson County, and he could paddle, and you could paddle then. And he did it. But a girl went to the school. But yeah, we took, I would ride with him because we were not, we lived in Old Hickory, and the school was in Robinson County. That's where he taught. So we went to school out there, and then I went to DuPont Elementary, DuPont Hadley, middle school, public, whatever. And then we went to, then I went to DCA for high school. You rode your bike to school. How long did that take?

uh not too long i mean old hickory like you'd go to real main roads uh well you could just ride it straight down we got rollerbladed to school yeah once or no no daniel rucker would roll yeah daniel rucker yeah never again i didn't you know because we never had daniel rucker rollerbladed and i would ride the bike but then i got rollerblades and they weren't ones that would go up above your ankle

And they're brutal, dude. Yeah, I mean, you need ankle support with rollerblades. Oh, yeah. And they would just be at the level they would cut into your ankles. I thought they just looked worse. It's just about your ankles. Oh, it was. It's all of it. It seems like you would just twist your ankles all the time. Oh, well, you would lean. You would use your ankles a lot to lean.

Here comes Nate. Here's Nate. Nathaniel. I remember once riding them. We got them for Christmas, and my parents bought the one rollerblades that are just the worst. Because you would see, you're like, well, the other kids, theirs goes up around their calf. Yours is like a regular shoe.

Oh, yeah. And so you would, and I remember one time we got them for Christmas, and so I was going to ride them pretty far from, if anybody's in Old Hickory, but Old Hickory Village to across the railroad tracks to my buddy Ryan's house by Old Hickory Country Club, which for the people that are from Old Hickory, they can reference it. So we would ride it pretty far, and I remember riding it, and I remember just like,

you know, really getting them out on some distance. Cause if you did them a little bit around the house for a little bit, you wouldn't really notice it around the, you know, but for, if you had to go some long one, it was like, I, I mean, I barely made it across the railroad tracks. Then I remember just taking them off and walking. Yeah.

The rest of the way, because, I mean, they hurt so bad because that plastic would just, they were plastic too. So just the top of the plastic would just cut into it. Oh, goodness gracious. Yeah, yeah, it was tough. Are these real Tums, by the way? Can I have some of that? I was still shocked that your dad was the punisher. You know, did I mention the last time I was on here, I have a paddling story where I went into the office and I kept telling my principal, I go, I don't have my 500-word report. I didn't write it. I didn't write it. I go, it's at the house.

and I forgot to bring it. And he drove me to my house to go get my... Yeah, true story. That's great. And he calls my mother. He calls Stacy. And he's like, hey, your son's here. He doesn't have his report, but he said that he left it at the house and he promises me he's telling the truth. He goes, do you mind if we swing by the house?

We get in Mr. Brown's truck. I'll never forget. We drive down. I lived about a mile and a half and I've never prayed for an accident so much of my life. We get to the, our house. I walk in, he parks in the driveway. I walk into my bedroom. I'll never forget. I sit down at my art table and I start writing and I'm sitting there and I'm writing for about a minute and a half. And I go,

I'm never going to be able to do this. So I go over to my underwear drawer and I start off with the smaller underwear to the boxers and I put on every pair that I have, probably 10 pairs. And then I put my jeans back on and I walk back out. I walk back out to the truck and I go, I can't find my report. And so we go back and he takes me into the principal's office. He goes, man, I had a feeling you didn't have your report. And he goes, I'm going to have to give you three licks.

And I bend over and he gives me three licks. I'll never forget. I walk out and the secretary, Miss Rita, she goes, that didn't sound like any paddling that I've ever heard before. You know, 10 years later, I run into Mr. Brown at the driving range in Madison, Alabama. And he comes up and he goes, man, I'll never forget, Derek, that time I drove you to your house and paddled you for not having your report.

He goes, I do a conference in Mobile where I speak. And he goes, I'll tell that story. Because he goes, I brought you to your house. And when we got back to the school, you bent over. And it looked like an ever-stopping gobstop. He goes, there was 11 different colors going up your backside. He goes, I saw every bit of your underwear. And he said, I just respected what you did so much that I just went ahead and gave you the licks anyways. But it was so fun to run into him again. Full circle moment. I thought I got away with it.

But he knew exactly what I had done. And yeah, I was fighting for my life, being a little rascal back in the day. I just don't understand, though, knowing that you're going to get this. These seem to got you seem like you got a lot of paddlings. Yeah. Yeah. You not just do the report. Yeah. I absolutely hated to do anything until this day that I did not want to do.

And so I would just, I just homework, anything like that. It wasn't, you know, I look back and, you know, and I'm sure I've heard Nate talk about this, but I beat myself up about being dumb in school and all this. It just, the format and how they presented was not built for me and how to learn and how to go about things. It was too tedious for what I wanted. So anyways, I don't feel like a lot was built for you.

I feel like you said that a lot. There's a trend here. Recliners work. This shirt wasn't built for me. Barely. I like, too, though, that you also were going to do the report in the house, and then you go, no, I'm never going to get this done. But you knew if you just do it, you wouldn't get the paddling. Yeah, but do you know how shocking? You know not to get caught.

Brad, but how are you not going to get caught? You have to turn in the report. Well, you hope that he goes like, all right, we'll turn it in Monday. And you go over the weekend and you write it. But it's like you just got to write it anyway. Let me tell you, I once heard an administrator. You were flicking people off. But I would write the report. Yeah, who are you? I would do the report. I once heard a vice principal in a break room as I was walking by. What terrible fate. I heard him go, Derek Stroop doesn't see tomorrow coming.

And as I've gotten older, now I've gotten away, they're so right. So what they were saying is like, I didn't think about tomorrow. I didn't think about if I wrote this, I would get out. I go, I don't want to do this. And then you're really on your heels when your principal drives you to your home. I couldn't believe it. I mean, I remember walking in there. I was like 12 thinking, can I call the cops?

Like, what is happening right now? But back in the day, that's it. It just shows the 12-year-old mind. Because if the principal is calling your mom and your mom's like, yeah, paddle him, you got to know they're going to drive you to the house.

They're going to get you. How long of a drive was that? Oh, just 10 minutes. Yeah, but that's almost a perfect saying. He's going to think about tomorrow. So it's like you just think, I'll get through. All I'm doing is get through today. That's right. So you're going to take some paddles. Yeah. Which a lot of 12-year-olds want. That's the price you pay. Yeah. If you're living in the moment. I'm the kind of guy, like, my parents didn't spank me very much, but, you know, I learned-

When they did, I was like, all right, I'm not doing that again. Whatever it was, I'm like, all right, I'm not doing that again. I'm not pushing them that far because I don't like that. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I don't feel like I was really pushing, you know, I was kind of living in this Dennis the Menace world. I don't think you're wrong. He's making you feel bad. Yeah, well, I was trying. This is coming from some hobo over there that was throwing pencils on buses.

But for some reason, he's taking it hard. Slamming girls' heads against each other. I should have said what I was thinking when Dusty was talking and gone. I would have never flipped off a stranger as a kid. No, I would have never done that. Ever. You got to learn how to navigate it. Losers. Dusty would call us losers. Why don't you write your paper? Yeah, we're on your side, Derek, and Dusty lived...

A life we don't know. I just, I'm so shocked that both of you went to school with paddling. Did you go to school with paddling? I'm so shocked. Why would you think? No, they, the first run of stopping it was with Brian. I wanted him to be included. Yeah. I appreciate that. Paddling. It wasn't even being talked about. Should it be out of the schools when he was just a new idea? Actually. What if we heard him? I would take it in lieu of suspension, you know, but cause fights are sporadic. You didn't know that was going to come.

I don't think you'd be paddling a ton in high school. It was more like elementary. Middle school was my high school. Middle school was like, that's kind of where your paddling is, where you're like, yeah, you just got to, that's the only chance. High school, you're getting into suspensions, you're getting into that kind of stuff. Because you can't hurt the kids then, because the kids are big. So...

I remember my mom paddling me and one day it didn't hurt and then it's like, well, wait till your dad gets home. Yeah, yeah, that's it. But it's like, I remember laughing. You gotta fake it. Like, cause you're like, your mom just can't hit you that hard and then, but yeah, then you're like, well, now he's gonna come home. Oh, Stephen can. Did you ever do the knuckle thump?

I didn't like the pain. You know, like quarters and stuff. I mean, I saw the lunch tables that did that, but that wasn't my crew. I didn't play those type of games. I'm not a hard thumper. People would do BBs. They would say they do BB fights, BB guns. And I was like, I know. I did that a little bit.

Yeah. Probably have some in you, right? I do. I did get shot in the chest. We'd put on, you remember those old leather jackets that had the map inside of them? Oh yeah. Yeah. We'd put those big heavy ones, zip them up and we'd, we'd shoot at each other. Yeah. I went first through eighth grade, same school, smallest school in Wilson County, about 150 students total. And then I went to the biggest school in Wilson County for high school. And I did a show in Lebanon with Derek and,

Remember that? Yeah, last summer. That brewery? Yeah. Upstairs in the round. We were prepared for it because we do arenas. There's 50 people there. And I... Did you ask them to all come on one side? Yeah, the round, there's like a row of one person. Yeah, yeah. No, it was a packed room. And I had a hot show, man. You did? And I walked off thinking, follow that, wild boy. And he...

After two minutes on stage, they couldn't even remember my name. Derek just blew the roof off. That's very nice of you, Brian. So he's a killer. Thank you. That's very kind of you. What does that have to do with what we're talking about? Well, we're about to wrap up, and I wanted to compliment Derek because I feel like you've been picking on him. Yeah, you're so nice, Brian. Thank you, buddy. I've not been picking on Derek. Dusty's been picking on him. I've been confused about some of your decisions when you were younger. Shooting birds off the back. And then he goes, I was.

would have wrote the report where he really got wild was when he was like I just wouldn't have done this to my parents yeah I cared enough yeah all the stuff he said I think he deserved to be stabbed yeah probably I'm on the girls side who was probably spanked at her new school I think we have to wrap it up right yeah

Yeah, yeah. All right. Yeah, I think we wrap it up once we ask, do we got to wrap it up? I think that's a good time. That's a good indicator. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, that's cool. Yeah. Thank you all so much for having me. Yeah. Always fun coming to join you all. Glad to have you. Thank you. Especially, well, I guess we're about to do where we're going because this is a good episode for me for this. All right.

Oh, yeah. Okay. All right. Nice. I can't wait. Well, because I'm going to Denver, so I feel like this might be an episode we get some people from Denver, Colorado Springs to watch this episode. Yeah. I'm going to Denver on Friday, Colorado Springs on Saturday. Yeah. So this will be good. Great time of year to go to Colorado, really. Yeah.

That's a perfect time of year. Yeah, I'm excited. Last week, leading up to the NFL draft, I said, if you got drafted into comedy and you had no – just like these players, you don't have a choice. What city would you go to? And we all had Denver pretty high on the list. Oh, yeah, great comedy city. Oh, I love the Cam Ward pick. Oh, yeah. Good for y'all. That's a – Pumped, pumped, pumped. He looks like a class act kid, doesn't he? I love it. He's got his head on straight. Yeah, zero star, the number one pick.

They should have talked about it more, but it's a love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. That's awesome.

Yeah, I got nothing coming. I get married in two weeks. All right. So May 10th, I get married and so excited. We're getting married down at the beach. So for the next two weeks, I'm off and hanging out. Out of my city? No, not my city. A lot of beads at the wedding. Our honeymoon, we're going to leave with two spray-painted T-shirts on a Frontier flight. All right.

Yeah, the invitation, I guess, is just going to come pretty close. I've not got mine. No, this is a pretty small get-together. That's what they say. I'm in it. We'll see the pictures. I'm his best man. Yeah, there's 350 people. Pretty small. Yeah, I guess, can we just show up? Yeah. Oh, yeah, absolutely. I would love that. Yeah, y'all just stop. Well, you should know that the reception, there's going to be some good food.

I mean, I've got quite the... Pimento cheese sandwiches? No, but I do love pimento cheese, but not... Pimento cheese sandwiches, I wish had some more texture, but the cracker with pimento... Anyway, I'll shoot you an email, but yeah, y'all show up. I'd love to see y'all. I've never heard someone say the bread is what ruins the pimento cheese sandwich. It's too mushy. A club cracker gives it some crunch. Yeah. So I like... If I'm going to eat pimento cheese, I want some texture. Yeah. So...

Okay. Anyways. All right. Well, my daughter's birthday's a party's on May 10th. We've invited Brian. So you may be invited to my wife's too. He's invited, but I, uh, so we won't be able to come. Oh, that's tough. Yeah. I think we just sent out yours. So that's weird, but yeah, that's okay. This gives me, this gives me a reason to miss this birthday party. So thank you. Uh,

- I'll be down there working anyway. Where's it at? Where, beach? - You know what's so funny? You know what the joke is, ladies and gentlemen? People hate wedding invites. So if I really would have invited everybody, everybody would be like, "Ah, oh my goodness." - Save the day. - But it's so fun to not be invited and go, "What, is there no space for me? Can I not get in?"

No. I wanted to come. Yeah. I have that day off. I asked for that day off on the hopes that I thought one of my friends would be getting married that day. I did not know which friend, but I knew. He canceled the show. I canceled the show. I had a big time show for charity. Yeah, big time. You're in a cold. So we go, what about a polar plunge? I go, what if I just come to a show? And now they go, well, I guess we're going to have to do a polar plunge. So now they're back to the polar plunge. And this is all over me getting married. Yeah. Yeah. Ice bucket challenge. Hmm.

May 9th, I'll be in Madisonville, Kentucky at the Ballard Convention Center. But I can still drive straight there. Oh, yeah. He'll make it. I'll make it. Madisonville, Kentucky. Yep. May 16th, 17th, Wise Guys Comedy Club in Salt Lake City. Yeah. Come see me there. Great club.

uh yeah my tour is starting up so we're about to be hitting the road yeah yeah uh so come out dropping in yeah yeah yeah i know i'm sorry again i apologize uh not being here but we're gonna start shooting the movie uh it's gonna be uh very fun got the book coming out movie uh whole whole thing so everything nate land we're gonna

We're getting it moving. That's exciting. Just, you know, I enjoy, yeah, when I'm not here, this is what the podcast will be. Just for you guys, we're a fun Nate Land podcast. It's beyond me. We're all professional comedians here. Most people like it better. Nate Land's the ideal. Yeah. Nate Land's the ideal of what it is. It's just, we're all from Nate Land. We're all just a bunch of idealistic people here.

Ideally. Yeah. Yeah. It's a great, yeah. We're all professional comedians here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're all having a good time. Yeah. All right. Perfect. So, yeah, that's it. Thank you. All right. We love you. I hope you have a great week and, yeah, we'll see you next week. See y'all. Bye.