#75 Jon Reep (And a little North Carolina)
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Hello folks. Welcome to Nate land. Uh,

I am Nate, that's Brian, Aaron, and we have a special guest in with us, my buddy John Reap. Thank you. Super excited. Yeah, everybody went crazy, dude. Everybody said, what? How'd y'all get him? And I go, it wasn't easy. We had to get him. We flew him out here. Yeah.

Thank you. A helicopter from downtown. He goes, I won't drive. Well, I like that you have a landing pad up here. Well. So very convenient for guests. I had to do it just for you. Most people are willing to drive, but you were. High maintenance that way. Yeah. Yeah. I drove to the airport in Nashville, but then I needed the helicopter from that airport here. Understandable. Yeah. Understandable. You know, we want to make you, make you happy. Thank you. All right.

I made it through those. That's what I got a lot. I read those correctly. You did great. Yeah. I mean, I did. It wasn't as good as, you know. You did great for you. For me. Yeah, not great in general. Just bills is the only thing. Bills. But that's just because you stopped. You know, my daughter just said it. How would you say, like a football –

Or a soccer... Like, what's the... A soccer team? No, where they play. Field? Yeah. Field. What did I just say? I think you said field. Field. Now that I'm aware of it... Field. I call it... It's a pitch, technically. Oh. Yeah. Yeah.

You're going out to the pitch. Would you play alone because you're in Alabama and no one knows what that means? A football pitch? I'll meet you at, I think, soccer pitch. He goes, you're in Alabama. You're going to go, boys, you're going to go to soccer pitch and y'all just be at two different fields. Because they would be like, what is he talking about? A pitch is baseball. They come out there with their baseball gloves.

And they're like, what are you talking about, dude? How do you kick this little ball? It comes from old money. It's like, you might not know. I never knew it was called a pitch. Yeah. Well, he's high. He's high. That's what the field's called? I think that might just be rugby, actually. I know rugby's called the pitch. I just went to my first soccer match. Nashville has a team now. Oh, yeah. And I knew nothing about it. And we were winning two to one. I'm watching the score, the clock countdown. Game over. I'm like, all right, let's go. And then they're like, no. They

They put more time on at the end. Yeah. After it's, I did not know this. Yeah. Yeah. How much time? I don't know. I couldn't find anywhere to even see how much time it was, but the other team tied it up during this. In stoppage time? Stoppage time. Yeah. Ooh. And then the game just ends in a tie. Oh, see. That's where. I don't like that. They should put that for y'all, for your age group. If they're trying to get y'all, they should put.

The explanation of that next to the weather. You think that's an age thing? I think your age relationship. Y'all are always checking the weather, and they should put it right below the weather, and they know 15 above is going to be like, oh, I get the game. Overtime? No, just because they want to see the rules of it. I knew that soccer did that.

But, I mean, I'm not the biggest soccer fan. But did you know that there's an overage time? Yeah. I think a lot of people know that. I don't really understand it so much. If I really studied it hard, I could figure it out. Well, it's always, is it like, do you even see that time? Or is it like a secret? I couldn't find it anywhere. That's what I. That's not so crazy to me. Oh, so you're saying it doesn't show up on a scoreboard? No, it just shows zero up there on the clock. So who's keeping track of it? I think it's, is it secret? Do y'all know? Yeah. Why is it so secret? I think it's odd. When you watch the World Cup on TV, it'll show like five minutes of stoppage time.

Yes, I think it says that. Well, it's stoppage time. And then they add stoppage time to the stoppage time, too. You can do it again. Oh, yeah. Wow. That's a lot. You get home late, you're like, man, the game ended two hours ago. And then you're like, but it was stoppage time. I'm not going to say it's a 50 and older thing. You guys know maybe this much more than I do. I know that. Yeah.

I go, Stan, I'd just love to see you up there in your seat. And he goes, hits all zeros. You go, all right, everybody. Let's get out of here. I did. You're passing people. Excuse me. Can you get by? And everybody's like, the game hasn't even started yet. I thought John might actually have. They stopped us at the time. I asked John how old he was before the show because I got excited. Yes. I thought I might have somebody that, but he's just. I'm 49. I'll be 50 in March. March what? March 26th. I'm 25. I'm 25.

You're 25 years old. I'm 25 years old. You're 25 years older than me. Oh, we have the same? Oh, okay. Listen, I'm trying to plan something. I just got engaged, by the way. Yes, congrats. Thank you. Very excited. And my fiance has never been to Nashville, and she wants to do like a 50th birthday party for me in Nashville. So I'm pulling out as many freebies as I can. Are you going to be around March 26th? Do you want to hang out with me? Oh, of course.

I actually already think I'm, I think I'm in, uh, do you know where you're in Durham? I'm in Durham. No, you're not. I swear to you. Are you really? I'm almost positive on my birthday. Can I go to your website right now? See if on his website, if he's in Durham, March 25th. It actually says wide open, be at home. Why would they put that on my website? Out of Nashville. Nothing to do. Not in Nashville. Right.

We're typing it right now. Slow down. Don't go that fast. So what are you- No, look, I'm in Atlanta. Oh, Duke. I'm honestly impressed that you know that that far out. Only because of my birthday. That's the only reason. Oh, right, right, right. I couldn't have told you anywhere else, but I could have told you. I don't know if I told this story, but I remember meeting Brian Regan for the first time. And I told him he was coming to TPAC. I don't know if I've said this. He was coming to TPAC in Nashville. Mm-hmm.

And I met him at Caroline's. It was so funny. Big Jay was opening for him. It was obviously not the cleanest comment. And so we're back there, and I just hung out with Jay. And so we meet Regan. And then I asked him, I was like, oh, you're coming? Because this was his last comedy club he did. And then he was going to theaters. This was years ago. Yeah, okay. And I go, you're going to be in Nashville at TPAC.

on this day. And I remember he was like, oh yeah, I think so. I don't, you know, it's hard for me to keep. And I was like, how do you not know where you're going to be? And I get it more than, it took me borderline 18 years to understand that he didn't,

know where he's going to be. How far out was it when you were asking him? A week, two weeks? No. Six months? I don't know if it was six months. It might have been somewhat close. There's times you're going, I don't know where I was last night. I'm like, where was I? How far out do you think you could go these days?

I know. Oh, I don't think I could. I know the first one's back, I think, is one Chicago. Go to January. I think it's Chicago. I go to Vegas in December. So I know like this weekend I go to Pittsburgh and Cleveland, and then I go to Vegas next weekend. Then I want to say, to start back up, it's like Chicago.

So you go all the way up to January? Cincinnati. No, Lexington. Sorry. I'm messing, I'm blowing the whole thing. Yeah, so I've, all right, two shows in Lexington. Yeah. Then Cincinnati and then Chicago. I'm the same. Like, I will get out to about,

mid-December. Yeah. If you ask me right now, I'd go mid-December and it's after that. After that, you're like, I don't know, somewhere. I'll just go look it up. Yeah. You tell me, I don't know. It's in your phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what they always ask you. That's too, the other thing that people always ask you, like, they're asked what time the show starts. Oh my God. It's just so, I had someone ask, they go, what time do you go on actually? And you're like,

Dude, we're not a band. Like, I think it's like a band, you could do that. Oh, right, right, right. Like the opening act. They want to skip the openers. But in a band, I think that's a little more asked because it's like the openers might play for 40 minutes or it might be...

an hour and a half before you go on. But for comedians, it's like, we go on 30 minutes and then I'm on. So what are you trying to say? Go see the opening act. Yeah, go see my friend. Yeah. I've invited my friends to come and he'll know that. Well, what time does Nate go on? Ha ha ha.

My buddy just went and saw John Mulaney at a theater, and he got there kind of late. And he's a comedian who opens for people, so he goes, I want to get there and see the opener because I've been that guy. So he's trying to get – there's a big line outside, and the show starts, and people start freaking out. And the concession stand lady goes, everybody, don't worry, don't worry. It's just the opener. The show hasn't even started. Oh, no.

The openers have it. It's hard. When you're an opener, it's... I mean, it's still great because you're in a theater. Yeah, it's still awesome. It's still awesome, but it's like... And you try to... I tried to make it very... As normal as you can make it. Just because I was... Obviously, we all opened forever. And so you try to make it as normal as you can, but it's just very hard. Because the show starts... I mean...

People don't get there. I feel like the fans are usually up close. They're most excited that they're there. So you're at least like, we try not to start. They always ask the percentage. I feel like how many you're in. I want to say it's like you try to get like 70% or something.

Like, you don't want to go, you know, if it's 40, you're not going to go up. Don't you think most theaters start kind of on time as opposed to clubs where they're like... I think we start usually, it usually ends up being 10 minutes late. I mean, there'd be a couple nights... Mm-hmm.

Where you're like, yo, everybody's here. We can go. It's a matter of the audience. The theater would like, everybody wants to start on time. But it's a matter of when people can get there. And sometimes there's traffic with COVID stuff. There's a whole thing. And then, so we try to start 7-10, 7-15. In LA, we started at 7-40.

and the show was supposed to be at 7 but LA is like you gotta go drive downtown and it's just a night I mean people don't even have a shot of getting in before 740 yeah but were they doing like COVID testing or something they might like LA does but

But they might have done that stuff. But it's just the parking down there. We went to the car show down there, the L.A. Auto Show, and the parking was insane. Where was that? At the convention center right next to Staples. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Yeah, that's a madhouse. Yeah. That whole area. Yeah.

There's like 18 interstates that go right through there. It seems like, right? Yeah. Every road seems like an interstate, right? They're on top of each other going different ways. It's like if you've got GPS, it's where you're like, well, I'm just going to get off the wrong thing. Because they'll say like turn left and then you're like, but they all... And it can't keep up with how fast you're... Actually, we'll slow down to like 15 miles an hour on an interstate just for my GPS to let me know. Oh, no. Oh, construction. We weren't ready for that. We weren't. Sorry. Yeah, it is.

Well, sometimes they'll show you the number, the name of the sign. Yeah. And then it's, uh, you know, it's like, it's good. It's like, go West. You're like, all right. So you start going West and the West is just to get you to go over there. Then it's like East. And you're like, you said West GPS. Well, how would you lie to me? Yeah. Yeah. Uh, so, uh, yeah, we've had, so yeah, it's been a fun week. Uh, I did have, I know a lot of people responded. Uh, thank you for the Grammy. Uh,

Thank yous or the Grammy stuff. You're very nice. Can we clap on here? I'm excited for you, buddy. We will. Congratulations. It's crazy, man. Looking at this list here. Look at this list, brother. Lavelle Crawford. Killer. Yes, one of the funniest dudes ever. I heard you, and I've quoted you saying this so many times, heard you on a podcast where you called Lavelle Crawford the triple threat. He's a triple threat. What does that mean? Because...

Well, he looks funny. You look at him, you start laughing. He's got a pointy head. Yeah. His eyeballs bulge out. He's a big dude. Yeah. He sounds funny the way that he talks. He could say anything and you'd be kind of laughing. Just, just call it away. Talk it out. He's just loud and he hits the words, you know. And then the things he says is actually funny. He's actually got good jokes and good material. That is a triple threat. It's a triple threat. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, Chelsea Handler, Louis C.K., Louis Black, me, and Kevin Hart. Yes, buddy. Very surprising. Congratulations. Do you get that midnight phone call? Like they always, you know, like it's an Oscar. It's like, oh, I was asleep. It was 2 a.m. and I got a phone call.

Is that what happens at the Oscars? I think so. Really? Did you see that story on Tonight Show's, the actors in there? And they're like, when did you know you were nominated? And they're like, oh, I was asleep. It was two in the morning and I hung up on it. I thought it was a joke. No, I think that's, the Oscars announce it just like the Grammys, but oftentimes they're in Europe or something. Oh, is that what it is? So it is the middle of the night when they find out. Yeah, that's probably what I'm thinking then. Yeah.

So when did you, yeah, what was your deal? It was the next day. And then, so I was in LA. So, uh, it was, they were being announced at nine and I, so I, they asked me not too long ago to come, to come announce some of these. So I was having to, but they said, you can't do comedy cause you're where I was submitted for, uh, everybody gets submitted. A lot of like being submitted is the Tennessee kid was submitted. Uh,

If you're Netflix, they make it. So it's an album, and everybody's asked about the album, but it's like they make these vinyls, and that's basically what gets submitted to here. People have. I've signed. I've autographed some vinyls.

Actually, the first time I ever saw the Tennessee Kid vinyl was someone asked me to autograph it. And I was like, I don't even know how you got it. I go, where did you get it? I pressed it myself. He goes, I like you. He goes, it was just him recording his own voice on it. He goes, Olivia. And this is when people laugh. And you're like, oh, he's into it. So is this just an album record?

I mean, this is album of the year, so is there no video for this? Not for this. It would be... An Emmy would be for the special. Right, right. And who decides this? But you can't do both. I mean, you can't have...

I mean, you could take the audio from a video and just say, well, that's an album. Yeah. So this is not just audio. This is audio from the video. Yeah. But it's like, I didn't record this separately. Okay. It was my special, and they just take the audio the way they play your album series. Sure, sure, sure. And so they just take it, they make it in a vinyl so they can submit you for a Grammy. Yeah, okay. Good deal.

Because otherwise, it would be just straight-up albums. Right. Who decides this? I had a big say in it. You paid them off? Yeah. They said, I mean, whoever the Grammy voters are, they vote. Are they the same people who will vote for the winner? I believe so. And, you know, one thing that is good, there's a lot of Grammy voters in Nashville. Oh, really? Because, I mean, there's a ton.

Because this is where music. Yeah. Which probably helped me. And then...

Yeah. So I found out, so I, so I did the thing where I read the names, which I made it through it. Yeah. I only had to stop a couple of times. I mean, I was like, what was, when was this again? I'm sorry. This was so before the first thing I got asked to do was come read like five categories and then the names who were being nominated. In LA? In LA. So they flew you out there? Well, I was, I was doing a show in LA, so I was there and they're like, can you just stay the 22nd or 23rd? Where did they film that? Uh,

At the Grammy Museum. Okay. Just curious if they're doing like a live thing with audience. No, there's no audience. Okay. So this was just, some people did it. You could do it by, I mean, some people did Zoom or something. Yeah. But I went there. Did you do it all in one take? I stopped. I think you do two takes. We did two takes just through all of it. Yeah, yeah. And then the second take, they would stop me and be like, I would say some stuff. Because some of those, I watched it. Some of those, they would come up and I'd be like, oh, man.

Because one of the categories was like best classical composer, you know, production. And it's all these foreign words. And I'm like, oh, man, here we go. But you nailed it, man. But they did not give me... I think they knew. And they gave me some... Everything was like... Tom Smith. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it was like...

Basically, very... You had some hard words, and there's no way he didn't practice that for days. There's no way. No, I don't get those names until then. You named that on one look.

I get, they hand them, when I open it is when I see the name. Really? You don't have time to practice? You've been sandbagging on here then because you don't have time to, they don't give you time to practice? They send me the categories I'm doing, but they don't send me, I only see, I open it like the way you, oh, the people on the stage open it. Wow. And you go, it's that envelope and I open it and then that's when I see the names.

But I'm just reading. I didn't read any of their names. I just read... Yeah, but still, that's a part of it. Do we have it? Like a savant. Oh, I'd like to see it, actually. If that's possible. I think I'm towards the end. There's no way you can play this. You're around the 30... Oh, yeah, for...

30-minute mark. For copyright stuff? I can't imagine. Yeah. You think, right? Yeah, yeah. No. Well, I mean, sometimes if you talk to him, you do like this. Yeah, you try to distract him. Hey, hey, I'm talking about something else. Yeah, so who was it that notoriously just met with it?

John Travolta butchered someone's name. Didi El Azizim. Remember that one? You didn't pull one of those, did you? No, no. You got through it pretty good. I did not have to say anybody's name. I would be nervous if I had to say someone's name. I think that's a different one. And I would be like, I would want to be...

If I had to say someone's name, I would want... I don't know. You'd want to go see... But you don't see any of this stuff until they're... You don't need time to practice that. Just make that person upset. The hard part for them is the stuff they thought I would mess up, I didn't. And then it was like I said... Instead of recording, I said recording. Yeah.

And they were like, they're like, what'd you say? And I was like, yeah, y'all thought I was going to mess up on the other stuff. I go, I concentrate on the other stuff. It's the word. I go, best recording album or something. I don't remember what it was. So you're like, look at some of these. Look at some of these nominations. Best historical album. Etching the Voice. You look good, mate. Oh, man. I styled it up. Etching the Voice.

Emile Berliner. See, no way. And the first commercial gramophone disc. You nailed gramophone. Well, I slowed down. I mean, I was at a full stop at a four-way stop, and I let every other car go. And I go, no, y'all go. Everybody get out of the way. And then I go, gramophone.

You had to read all of that? Excavated. I mean, I was like, there was a pause. I mean, you just got to realize, on here, if I speed up at all, we're in trouble. That last one, you... Les Miserables. I think I said that. I did. I go, Les Miserables. And they go, no, it's just Miserabob. Miserabob. I thought it was Les Miserables.

Les Miserables. That's what it is. It's Les Miserables. That was the only thing I questioned whether you got it right or not. Well, that was the one that I think they probably said, that's good enough. Baccarat. I would say less miserable. But I was saying like Baccarat. No. And that guy's been out. Burt Barak. Burt Barak.

I go, Bertie B., congratulations. You and Stevie Sates. Skater. He got some stuff. Webber's Cinderella. We should have gotten Webber's wrong. That would have been great. Andrew Lalloy. Best musical theater album. Can you see what the other things were? Yeah, best compilation. Best compilation was a tough word. Oh, my goodness.

Schmigadoon. Schmigadoon. But they told me that. They go, it said schmigadoon. Sometimes it's that weird of a word. Now, if I just saw that word, that lady said, it's schmigadoon. Okay. But this one was Dear Evan, like Cruella, the United States versus Billie Holiday. I just talk really slow. Because it is. It's very embarrassing. Look, it's very fun, funny on here. Sure. But you're looking at like, these are real people.

I consider all of us, and even you listeners, none of us are real people. We can all just make fun of each other. But you're like, I'm in the real world now. Yeah, plus we're always having to combat getting made fun of with our southern accent. You're like, no, I want to prove to you. My daughter made fun of me last night for the football field. Because I said field. She goes, it's not...

Field. It's filled. And like she kept saying that, I go, field? Filled? Field? Filled? Yeah. I had some lady, I was doing Zany's this weekend, and I do a bit where I talk about, remember that diet candy in the 90s called AIDS? It was a square piece of chocolate. And they called it AIDS? Swear to God. Look it up. Yeah. He knows every candy. So the joke was, you know, they were doing well. This is why Corona changed their name. Yeah. Because the beer company.

Put pressure on them. Be like, hey, we saw what happened to the AIDS candy because of AIDS. So we're trying to learn our lesson here. But I was asking the audience, do you remember this diet candy? And this lady goes, I knew it was called AIDS. I said, it's AIDS. So the joke went away because of the way she was pronouncing it. AIDS. And they spelled it with a Y. AIDS. I was like, I don't remember the spelling, but now she's right. It was A-Y-D-E-S. Reducing AIDS.

Yeah, Diet Candy. I'd love to make fun of her, but there's a great shot I would set it like that, too. I'd be like, she's right, John. I'd be in the audience. I'd go, Mr. Reap, she's correct, A-Yids. It's two syllables. It's four letters, A-Yids. A-Yids. Go back to the Grammy thing. I want to see. There was one I thought. I did say recording was. I said recording. Recording, yes. And that was the other one. But that was the.

It says Graham, or what is that thing? What was I? Oh. I lost it. Don't worry about it. I don't care. There was an episode of... It's the highlight of my life. There was an episode of Friends where Joey, who's, you know, he's an actor on Days of Our Lives, and they go to the soap opera awards, and he loses...

his category but then he has to present and he's just furious because he's so mad about it and I was just thinking about you if you didn't I mean you weren't even expecting to get nominated for album of the year but go to the next with the thing no is it the recording package yeah yeah this is it so I said best recording package for recording package the nominees

American Jackpot. Yeah. American Girl. Yeah. You don't have to play this whole thing. Because Carnage. But so then, I didn't have to read the names. Right. So they just, I just read the top thing. Right, right. Just mute it. Or you can't even show it, can you? I don't know. Sometimes if you just minimize it and you move it around, I think it's all about the time. But Serpentine Prison, I did Zeta and Zeta. But they, but I said best...

And then they, and I got through all the names good. And I was like, huh? And they go, I think, did you say recording? And I go, maybe. And that's when I told him, I go, guys, I'm going to mess up the words y'all don't expect me to mess up. So just wrap your head around that. Yeah.

Some of these words you're not going to, you're going to think. Yeah. Maybe you're going to second guess yourself with the pronunciation. Maybe I'm right. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes if you look at the word, it says, there's different pronunciations of the word. Yeah. You say record and best record recording. How else would you say it? I would say recording. Recording. Or field. Aids. Aids.

Congrats, dude. Seriously. That is amazing. When do you find out? When does this happen? That night of the Grammys. January 31st. January 31st. So we got to go to the Grammys. What will you be doing? You're going? You'll be there. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you get to go. Yeah, that's right. I got to take, I bought two tickets. I thought, well, I'm a nominee. Might as well scalp some tickets. You know, see what happens. See how it plays out. That was a dumb question. Are you going to try and do a show while you're out there or just going to go out there for a couple days? That's such a comic.

That's such a comic thing. I'll probably go do a spot later. Pop in the store, try to pop up. I'll pop in the store. You do always... Oh, we're booked, man. Sorry. If you win, I feel like I always did have a fantasy of...

and then going to do a spot. Oh, see. Like, that did always happen. I always thought about that. Like, you know, when you think about, like, if you ever won an award, you're like, then go, be like, go do a spot right after. Wearing the makeup and the tuxedo. Yeah, with the tone, yeah. I'd have to see, I think you go to, like, after parties and all that stuff. I mean, I'll be... Gonna watch the sunrise at Liza's? Yeah. What did you say? He's like, you're not gonna bring me down, I'll just watch the sunrise at Liza's. Minnelli? No. No.

yeah I mean you would I think you're out you know I think it'll be out as long as you want to go out it'll be cool to I think the night probably just like goes very fast I mean I think you're there and it's going to be so incredible being the first time I've never been to something like this yeah and then uh this was a lot are they doing it at the where will the actual ceremony be Staples Center okay and then uh

So they, yeah, so they, I think you just, but I bet the night goes quick. Like you're just like going to different parties or whatever. I mean, there's a whole thing. Cause I was like, how do you get invited? You know, like, how do you, do you have to like call them? Like, can I go to this? But it's your publicist like does all that stuff. I didn't know that. I was like, I thought, you know, it was like certain people. I mean, I don't think everybody gets invited everywhere. I think he was like, if you win, I think you can go anywhere. And then otherwise your publicist like has to get you in all the parties.

You know, and it says, what about this? Can he come? Yeah. Is it an award they actually do during the actual TV broadcast? I don't know. I hope so. I think they used to. I remember. I don't know. I feel like this is the first time. You look at all those comedy albums. Those are straight stand-up specials. That's a pretty interesting group. That's all. You know, usually it's...

I feel like we used to have spoken word. We used to get mixed in with, we'd be up against Michelle Obama reading a book or something. And you're like, well, what are we going to win? We're not going to win that. And so this is the first, am I crazy? Yeah, it's like spoken word. Yeah. What was, look at like the last couple of years of comedy. I feel like,

The last few years, we were always mixed in with spoken word. I believe we are in a boom in stand-up comedy. Yeah? And I absolutely do. More people are aware of stand-up than they ever have been. With TikTok, there's a ton of people doing jokes. Your jokes, my jokes, all of our jokes. Like, Vecchione has that one joke. I mean, it's all over. So, like, all these people...

Stand-up is being watched and consumed so much. And with Netflix, it's never been more popular than it is right now. Yeah, and the audiences are getting more sophisticated and aware of techniques, of jokes, and everything else. So you can't even...

I don't think we've ever had a light on us and I think we have a light on stand-up now. And so people, you know, because it's like music, everybody's always found. But now, like, you know, I think open mics sometimes have more crowds than they used to and people want to see...

people moving up and stuff. So it's, yeah, it's interesting. Well, maybe it's his own category, spoken word. There is a spoken word category. I mean, can you not see the nominations? Yeah, they're all comics though. Who won last year? Is it just those four were nominated? In 2019. We go back to 2014, like Weird Al had a, you know, his music album was nominated. Oh, yeah. Maybe, all right. So maybe it is. Maybe I'm completely wrong.

But to your point, there has been something where comics are thrown in against... With spoken word. Is it the specials? No, the Emmys? I don't know. Well, wasn't there like, was it the Academy Awards? I forgot what it was. But like that... Movies we've even... Yeah, like that. So if you're up against that,

That stuff's completely not fair either. Like Fallon's, even though I love Fallon. Oh, right. You got Fallon and Tenacious D. You're like, well, those are musical things. Right. Right. Okay, yeah. So all those that you're with right now, that category is all straight stand-up, no music, just straight stand-up. I mean, that's what like... So people ask me, they talk about Bo. Bo's the nominated. I think I read the nomination that he was in. But...

Bo Burnham's special. But it's a little bit of like, I mean, you know, his special was like him doing, I mean, it's unreal. Bo Burnham's one of the most talented people I've ever met in my life. I think he'll be one of the more talented people that I've ever met. I mean, there's just no one like him. He's great. I've seen him since he was, I mean, he did New Faces when I did, or no, he went to Montreal when I did New Faces. Oh, really? He was 16. God.

And I remember everybody just, it was 2008, and everybody was just going crazy about this kid. And he just blew up on YouTube. But I mean, that dude is on another planet with how just original and stuff he is. But it's like he sings songs. So it's like there's a, you know, it's like a tricky kind of... Yeah, it's different. It's different. Yeah. So it's nice to see just straight...

stand-up comedy having its own category for once. Yeah, we were always lumped in. I thought we had something with spoken word, but it's cool. There was some award, and I forgot what it was, where there were movies that weren't comedies that were winning Best Comedy Pick.

Oh, yeah. For a minute. I forgot what that was. The Golden Globe does comedies and musicals in one category. And so sometimes, you know, La La Land or something will be beaten out. I remember The Martian qualified as a comedy in the Golden Globes. That's not a comedy. It was kind of funny. It's got funny parts, but I wouldn't say it. No. It's a great movie, but yeah, it's not a...

Unbelievable movie. Congrats. Thank you. It's a good Thanksgiving. Can I vote? Is there a voting app we can do? I'm going to try to. If everybody put in promo code Nate, go to Grammy.com, promo code Nate, and vote, and we'll get it all voted up. Let's read a couple of these ads, and then we'll do some of these podcasts.

All right. Let's read some of these comments. We haven't even got into this episode, and this has been, you know. Oh, that's the dude from the World Series who caught the ball, huh? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's the Cubs. As I told everybody, y'all, I think it'll be in everybody's best bets that I don't win this Grammy.

Because I'm going to show it to everybody. I'll put it here. You should. I won't even be on camera. I'll just have the Grammy on. With the mic pointed at it. What does it look like? What does a Grammy look like? Is it a globe? It's a gramophone, I'm pretty sure. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm trying to think of how you could just put your face on there somewhere.

Like you just have a cut out of your face and stick it inside the thing. Oh, yeah. Or if you just make it to where it'll play one of your bits when you hit the button. Yeah. This is what like... When you go on stage, just put that on the stool and hit play and walk off. It's like you're getting one of those bass fish that sings. Take me to the river. You can buy a legit one.

Not a real one, but you can buy it. I'm sure you can buy it. A replica. Tons of replicas of those things. Probably on Broadway if we walk down and get one. Right outside. You get it. All right. The 2010s episode comments. Matthew Deans. Demez. Demez? Demez.

Completely agree with Nate about Bartman. Steve Bartman was the guy. In my opinion, he was just a fan trying to catch a foul ball, as were about six other people. Like everyone has tried to do since childhood. Been a Cubbies fan my whole life, and what happened to him is unforgivable. He has taken the ultimate high road, never did interviews, never tried to monetize. He just wants to be left alone.

Moises Alou made the whole situation worse by acting like a baby. Everyone forgets Alex Gonzalez making an error on the next play, an easy double play that gets them out of that inning. But just know it wasn't all Cubs fans, just a very loud minority. Cue up the great good work with Aaron and Bernans. Man, I felt bad for that dude. He got tons of death threats. Oh yeah, I was living in Chicago during that time. That was when we talked about it. It makes me furious. Yeah.

Samuel and Adamic. Adamic. This is a fan base that hadn't even been to a World Series in a lifetime, finally getting close, and when they're counting the outs on one hand, this guy and others around him, it wasn't just him. This is the singular thing you cannot do in this situation. Millions of sports' longest-suffering fans have their souls crushed yet again, and I'd say at least justified in being more than mad. Not just by throwing things at him and sending him death threats or making it impossible for him to live in the community by any means.

I mean, you can be upset, but I'm complaining about those things that you said. That's the problem. They did all of those other things. But anyone with any sense can forgive the fans for exhibiting quite a bit of vitriol. Vitriol? Vitriol. Yeah. Almost sounds positive.

It sounds like a medicine. Yeah. If you're like, Oh, there's a lot of vitriol. It goes showing a lot of vitriol out here. You're like, Oh, that's a pretty good parade, huh? No, no. You walk out just beating people with bats. You're like, I don't know what vitriol means. You said, ask your doctor about vitriol. Of course the series was blown because of a litany of mistakes on the Cubs part. So it wasn't all him, but the idea that he's just innocent is also not true. He is just innocent. And, uh,

I mean, Moises Alou, I'll be honest with you, that picture looks like he does have a... But that's even, I think, after it bounced...

I almost want to say that's after it bounced. Yeah, you may be right about that. I don't think he had that good a shot. Well, he's looking at the ball. He's not looking down to see if there's a player there with his glove in front of him. He's not reaching over. No, he's just like, the ball's going to hit me or I can catch it. Yeah, I think the ball was farther in and then he can do it. But, I mean, like this guy says, like, look, I understand being upset about it. A, Cubs have a problem with they won 100 years ago and they act like they're –

supposed to win every year. You're not that. You might be that now. You're working towards that. But quit acting like you're the Yankees and you're like, we're owed this. You're not. You haven't been good for a hundred years. Right.

And you act like y'all every year. You're like, well, Chicago, and I don't want to get into all fans. Chicago Bears has that. Yeah. They're fans. They think they're the Cowboys. Like, you won in 85. Right. And, like, you haven't won. They've got good sports history, just not sports courage. The Bulls are garbage, except for the Jordans.

So you get lucky. The Blackhawks are the only one that's like, they deserve it. Like they are, they are in, I believe this is me going off the top of my head, but I believe they're in the Stanley, they're in the running every year. They've won a lot. Yeah. But these other ones, like you're like the Cubs, you're like, who do you think you are?

Like, what are you talking about? You're like, we've been suffering for a hundred years. You go, what are you? A hundred years. There's no more suffering. You don't get to go. You get to suffer if you're on like a 40 year stretch and you, and you have someone that remembers both. Right. Right. There's eight people. You're just not good. Yeah. There's eight people that were alive that were even could be like, I was around for both of those. Maybe. I don't know how many people, they would have been a baby. I got a White Sox fan said, don't blame us for.

Those Cubs fans. I don't blame the White Sox fans at all. Who were they playing in that game right there? The Marlins. The Marlins. Who went on to win the World Series. I look at a problem with the Marlins. When the Marlins were crying about Derek Jeter trading all those people in Miami. And I remember Dan Levitard was on there crying. You're like, y'all won your first year in Miami.

In the MLB, like the Heat win, the Dolphins haven't won, but you want to go once. You want to go like, chill out, dude. Like they've won, I think, two. And they've been around for maybe 20 years. And he's like, he's bawling. Like, my team, we've been struggling so long. And you're like, now there's a new thing with these. That's why these people, they feel like they're owed all this stuff. And I can speak for this as a Vandy fan. We don't get anything.

We're luckily getting college baseball now. You don't feel like you're owed anything. But I'm not going to act like if we lose, like you don't understand how long we've been suffering. Like people talk about suffering. They've been suffering for 20 years. You're like, well, give me a break. That's a blink in the eye. Be a Vandy fan. Wake up. I don't,

I wouldn't even wake up for that. I mean, that's just us winning an SEC game where it takes us 20 years. You just stretch it out. You're like, oh, yeah, just woke up, feel great. I say that to him. We were suffering in the 70s, buddy. Was Vandy the only team in the SEC that didn't make a bowl game this year? I saw that. Yeah. And we're the reason all the other teams did make a bowl game. But we're all right. Look, Vandy's been – no one cares about –

I know there's a lot of people listening. I actually am excited about Vandy football. I think they... I like Clark Lee, the coach. Yeah.

I think we actually scored some points throughout the year that looked good. We had a couple games that were close. No one's expecting anything out of us this year. The people that are expecting something, Vandy fans, some of them need to come back to the realization we are not what we think we are. I don't know what you think we are. Franklin came in. We thought we were great, but they're redoing the stadium, the renovations. That's the stuff that we needed.

to happen. And then we can go, but let's build up to that with football, baseball, where obviously good basketball, that's what was close. It needs to get, I want basketball to keep getting better and it should be, I think it is, but I think basketball, we should be in the top five, three to five in the sec every year. Uh, but for football, it's like, let's relax.

Like, you've got to believe in this dude, and let's see what he can do. I mean, I'm not saying he gets to go be a coach for however long he wants to be a coach for, but let him build these new things, build this city, and, like, I'm actually kind of excited about the Vandy. So how do they do this year? I've been paying attention. Vandy this year. Two and ten.

But last year we were 0-10, so it's an improvement. Were we 2-10 or 2-9? 2-10 this year. 12 games. This is a brand-new coach, last couple years? First year. This is first year. This is first year. Yeah. Well, yeah, you've got to give him a couple years. You've got to give him a couple years. Vandy has a hard time with that. I mean, that was like the thing with, you know, people didn't like James Franklin when he first came. And then when he left, and you're like, well, we've got to hire, like, you know, Mason didn't work out. But when Mason was hired, he was like one of the top dudes. Mm-hmm.

You know, stuff doesn't work out. It doesn't work out anywhere. Everybody leaves and gets fired everywhere. So it's just a tough. I think people are getting, coaches are getting fired too quick. Oh,

I mean, I remember it used to be like these guys would hang around five, ten years with mediocre losing records before they would bounce. And they would always be like, well, you got to give them a couple years to get the system worked out and the players they wanted to get in there. Nowadays, it's like a season or two and they're gone. There's too much money. And the money is pure insanity. And they're just paying these dudes. You shouldn't be allowed to leave. Right.

Like, they should have to sign a contract and be like, you got to be here. Like, you know, I like the buyout thing for the coaches, but then the coaches are like Lincoln Riley just left. Like, you know, it's like you can't leave, dude. You can't, like –

it's insane. Like you guys are just doing whatever you want to go do. I mean, are you got to let the players do that? If you're going to do that, do that. But then you're losing any home team. Why would I even, you're never going to be, you know, uh, like rooting for you're like, that guy's been here for a vein. We used to have guys. You're like, you felt like they were there for eight years. And nowadays it's like, you look at like Duke basketball. Yeah. You don't know these guys. You know, they've been there. College basketball. I don't know.

It's going to change, right? Because...

These kids are going straight to the pros. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So one and done. It's Vandy because we stay the same. And then the smaller schools like that, well, we don't spit them out after one year. We had Darius Garland. He played four games and got hurt. He's at 26 points the other day against the Cavs. You're one of the few people anywhere, Vandy fans, who actually saw him play for Vandy. Took my daughter. Saw him on LSU. We lost. Bensimons at 30 points. All right.

The reselling teacher. I mean, Nate was talking about books and said, and by the way, I don't know if any of this is true or not. I thought that pretty much sums up this entire podcast. That's what this podcast is about. What happened? What was that? I don't even know. He was on a rant about books and movies and then in the middle of it, he's like, I don't know if this is true. Yeah. Right. That's just your opinion. That's what the... Right. This is not an informational podcast. This is an opinion. This is just you. No, we are listed as educational. Educational. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, you say like under the, uh, yeah. Spotify. That's how we're categorized. Comedy too. Right. Yeah. But educational. We've had people write. I got to do that for my podcast. I got to get it under educational. Yeah. You sneak in the back door, you know, I was thankful we were ranked. Have you heard of the world podcasting federation? No, we were just, as some, they ranked stuff and we were, there were algorithms where we were just ranked number two.

Wow. According to the World Podcasting Federation. Country-ish with John Reap and Hefron and Reap. That is a URL that I bought and ranked myself. Oh, okay. Yeah, me and John came up with that idea. There's no rules on the internet. You can do what you want.

So we just made up our own. So now when you look it up, it looks like I guess they're doing pretty good. And then, of course, he's third. We can put you guys up there, any spot you want. Well, four and under. Heffern's got to stay up there because it was our idea. So this will be four tomorrow. Yeah, thank you. Thank you. We'd appreciate that.

I love that. World Podcasting Federation. Ranking the best podcasts of all time from around the world. The World Podcasting Federation is made up by a consortium of podcasts and media specialists from around the world and is committed to ranking the best podcasts available on the internet. Rankings are based on many important statistical algorithms and calculations that are too complicated to explain here. Yeah.

That's such a good way to end it. It's just, well, what are they? It's just a lot. Yeah, you won't get it. It's too much. Just trust them. We don't even understand them. We don't even understand them. How many numbers does it go?

Oh, I think it just goes to... So I actually put the Nate Land podcast on here. Oh, the hacker, hacker. You hacked in there? No, I just edited it on our end there. It just went in there. How do you even do that? Dude, when he was sitting here doing it, I'm like, how did you do that? How do you know how to do that? This guy's good. Yeah.

We almost gave the computer back to Brian. Oh, really? Because when Jay Cutler was here, he was... Oh, yeah. What was the problem? He doesn't look stuff up. What happened was I couldn't read Jay Cutler's mind, and that really got in the way of Googling stuff. You know, start trashing Jay Cutler. At one point, he just reached over and grabbed the computer and was like, I'll do it. Oh, yeah. He was great. That's a quarterback for you. Just give me the ball.

ACC bigs. I agree with Nate's point on them not advertising or distributing movies well. But I chuckled at the no one watches the Oscars. Everybody watches the Masters. The 2021 Masters was up in the ratings with 9.45 million viewers on average. The 2021 Oscars was drastically down with 10.4 million viewers on average. So they were still better than the Masters. Yeah.

Sometimes it's like you feel that. Sometimes you just go off, and I always think about it. You go off what you feel like people are talking about, that you're in your world. So you're not like the comedy world, but I'm in Nashville. You're like, all right, and maybe it's going to change.

But that's what I always kind of go off where you're like, well, but it could be I have a lot of people that are golfers. Right. And they watch the Masters and all that kind of stuff. And then the Oscars is like, I'm not going to have that many, you know, just like because I'm back home. Mm-hmm. You didn't watch the Oscars. That's not your bubble. That's not the people that are around you are watching it. Yeah. But everybody watched the Grammys. Mm-hmm.

Nick, Grammy's one of the best award shows in the history of Earth. Yeah, this is going to be the best one ever. I'm going to start a website. You need to start one of these. World Grammy. Yeah, best Grammy nominees of all time. You're number one. Number one. Biggest snubs of Grammys. And I go, number one, neighbor gets it. It's embarrassing. Nick Braunwell. Nick Braun Brown. Brownell? Brownell. Brunell? Brunell.

I've never wanted to pat someone on the back as much as I did for Aaron when Graham called that decade the aughts. What would you call the 2000s and 2009s? Did you call them the aughts? That's a good question. I just go 01, 02. Oh, you mean like the whole decade? Yeah, the whole decade. You know what I do is I go 2000s.

Without even thinking, I just go $2,000. That's what everybody does. But I've heard people say oughts. Yeah, they're usually younger. I kind of like it. Huh? I kind of like oughts. You hear it right when they take something from your wallet. Like, you ought not do that. They steal your... You ought not do that. You ought not do... They should not do it. You got to the pitch, and then you... Head out to the pitch, and then the oughts. You go, I built this pitch during the oughts. And everybody's like, well, I don't even know what you're talking about, man. It took you 10 years? No one has ever nodded their head in such...

vindicated satisfaction is Aaron at that moment. Let it be known that Nate land will net for now on referred to 2000, 2009 as the odds. Yeah. Y'all can, y'all can call it the odds. You don't like it. You don't like the odds. You know what we should do? We should do a poll. Yeah. Yeah. No one wants to do this. It's fun that just a listener just makes a decree like that. Like let it be known. All right. We'll take your word for it. Well, we will do a, uh, we'll do a poll about it. No one likes our polls. What do you mean? You do,

I did a poll. He doesn't like something. If I don't like it, then I'll... It doesn't matter. We did a poll. Didn't get the results we wanted. Nate goes, let's let everybody think about it for a week. Then we'll do the poll again. Not a week. An undetermined amount of time until he convinced everyone. Yeah. You got to let me convince. I don't remember what it was. I want to know if it was Let's Go Folks. Let's Go Folks. It's their main thing. It was this. Let's Go Folks and Hello Folks.

So we say hello, folks, to stop. Yeah, hello, folks. To start the podcast. And then we start saying, we make fun of people that say let's go. Because let's go is getting, people use it everywhere. So we now say let's go, folks. But because of this, it's come into, it's an awesome thing. So when I go on stage, would they yell hello, folks, to you? Yeah. So they yell hello, folks, when he goes out. And they yell let's go, folks. Because they know you don't like it. Because, yeah. Oh.

And so it's like a very, yeah, it's a fun inside thing. So Let's Go is getting old. I mean, it's, you know, let's go. Like a game or something. Let's go. Yeah. Well, now they use it everywhere. They use it everywhere. There's this one redneck Panther fan. Well, there's many of them.

But this one guy put a video of him doing this theme song. At the end of it goes, let's go, let's go. So now we say sometimes, let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go is let's go. Let's go. I think I like that better. Yeah. Because it just sounds different. Yeah, let's go. Speaking of rednecks at Panthers games. Yeah, do you see the dude that got kicked out for dancing in the end zone with the mascot? Yeah. Yeah, I saw that. That was in 1995, 96. Wait, this just came out? That's me. Yeah.

Oh, is it? Yeah. That's me the first year the Panthers played in the NFL. I'm doing the moonwalk on grass. It's not easy. Michael Jackson crotch grabs. I'm singing what I like about you. And I used to break dance, so I thought I'd do the worm. And I'm doing the worm, and then the refs come out behind me. I didn't see them, and then it's a full-on wedgie.

And then this other guy comes over to defend me. That's Dale Earnhardt. And then you've got this dude who was with the Sir Purr mascot. That's our mascot, Sir Purr, to defend me because I was already dancing in the stands making people laugh. Now, look, I was already in that side of the field. They could have kicked me out. They marched me 99 yards. And

It's the longest walk of shame. And these people are throwing beers at him, screaming, let it go. I like that. You're throwing them at you for sure, throwing at them and not you. Oh, 100%. You got it. Oh, yeah. And he never let go of my pants the whole time, 99 yards.

I put my arm around him at one point. I felt like, well, let's just hold each other. But yeah, that was the first year of the NFL. You have that belt. That's when I wore my belt like that. Your belt hung down. The braided belt. The braided belt. Wrap it around and stick it down. That was so cool. Yeah. It's so...

You're just talking to them and your pants are just all the way up. I'm trying to reason with the guys. Like, dude, I was invited out here by the mascot. You didn't see the... And they weren't hearing it. And they're like, we've got to kick you out. It's an NFL rule. And he was kind of mean. Sir Purr invited me out there. Yeah. That's how you got on the field. Yeah. Yeah. I was already having a good time. And we learned together in that moment that Sir Purr does not have the authority to invite people onto the field. He didn't know it either. It was the first year with the NFL. Yeah.

And we learned a lot that year. Well, you're playing on a college field right there, right? Yeah, it's Clemson. So everyone still has a college mentality. He's like, yeah, come on down here. Yeah, exactly. And a player was hurt, so they were working on this player for like 10 minutes. Yeah. And they're just playing music. This is during an injury time. Screw that guy. I'm having a good time. That guy's paralyzed. They take him off the field. Yeah, he didn't make it. Look at you. Yeah.

Did they ever get it, or they just got you out? They just kicked me out. And then they sit out there, and they ask you all kinds of questions. And they got my ID. Well, it's like a week later, I got all this free crap in the mail from the Panthers. Oh, that's awesome. They realized they screwed up. It wasn't my fault, technically. And so I got a sipper bottle, a key chain, coffee mug.

I mean, that's like they just grab stuff around the office. They hear a senator. They go, who's got stuff? They go, God, I don't know. I think they thought I was going to sue them or something. Yeah. I found out later that the guy in the mascot,

His name is Tommy Donovan. And I used to pretend to be mad at the surfer, like, I'm going to find out who that guy is who got me kicked out. And I reached out to him, and he does comedy now. Oh, really? Like, he opened for me not long ago. Oh, wow. In Valhalla, South Carolina. That is awesome. And he's actually pretty good. He's a pretty cool guy. Yeah. This all worked out. Yeah. Did he know you? No, I wasn't even doing stand-up at this time. Oh, yeah. No, I hadn't even done stand-up. I had been talking about doing it, but at this point, I hadn't.

Yeah, that was like in 23. But why did he invite you on the field? Well, I was already dancing in the stands. So every time out, I'd get up and start dancing to make my friends laugh.

And so there's like 10 of us and they would be like snickering or whatever. Next time out, I'm up again. Now it's not just my friends, it's people around them. So slowly it turns into a thing. Every time out people start and it grows, right? So third quarter, my buddy Marty, he said, you got to get on that grass hill behind the goalpost so the whole stadium can see. I was like, you're a genius. It was a great idea. So, cause Clemson had that grass hill. Anybody could just go sit up there.

And so I make my way over there, you know, and that's when this guy got hurt. They're playing music the whole time. And I would just do what is not on this tape is the best part. Yeah. I'm literally got like, I don't know, 50, 60,000 people listening and why I'm conducting them because I'm behind the goalpost. I do one dance move point like that. They go, God,

And I'd cut them off and do the Hulk Hogan hand behind the ear to the other side. Like it was huge. And so the mascot who's doing his own thing is kind of like, no one's looking at me right now. They're looking at this kid. And so he walked over and just said, come out here and dance with me. He wasn't even thinking. He just waved me out there. And then my friends just threw me over the fence. Get out there.

And that's when the tape kicks in. Yeah. After the invitation. So people who see this, they think I was just some drunk idiot who ran out there, but I was invited. Yeah. And this is on your YouTube channel? Yeah. John, if people want to look it up. Who filmed this for you? There was a freelance photographer.

Who was standing there. That's a great wedgie. I give these cops credit, man. I mean, they do it perfect. Like the back of your heels never touch the ground. I mean, you go like the timing. That's the best timing. It's the best timing I've ever seen in my life. Go back to the beginning. I've never seen timing like this. Watch. His heels don't touch the ground. They kind of waited for it to get there. They go. He's on his toes.

The timing is... I mean, if you told me everybody was in on it, I would believe that. Like, it's unbelievable. One minute, I'm having the best time of my life. This is the best thing I've ever done. Next minute, bam. I'm like, what's going on? I was like, hey, take it easy. Why are there three of you? Yeah.

I don't understand what you guys are meaning. Why are they yelling at me? You have no idea. Everything's great. Bam! It's your belt. Pause it right there. This is, I love this dude, the third cop.

I tell people that's Dale Earnhardt. Because he looks just like Dale Earnhardt right there. Because I've told this, I've showed this on stage and dissected it in front of an audience before. So I used the Dale Earnhardt joke there. And if you go a little bit forward and pause it again when that third guy comes in, bam, now this dude's got a sweet blonde mullet. Yeah.

And he was actually... He's on your side. He's on my side. He is with the mascot. Yeah. And he was trying to explain to the cops, no, no, no, we invited him, we told him, and then they argued for a minute. But, yeah, that dude, he was actually letting the cops have it. Like, he was throwing around F-bombs and everything at these cops, and I was like, whoa. Yeah.

But here we go. And then they turn it off, turn it back on. Now I'm getting kicked out. Who's filming this? It's a freelance photographer who was just recording it. My brother and my friends were standing next to him when this was going on. And my brother grabbed him and said, hey, did you just record that whole thing? He's like, yeah, I guess what do I got to do to get

that thing. Yeah. Oh, man. And he gave him his card, my brother's card. And so my brother got this card unbeknownst to me and he called the guy and paid that guy like a hundred bucks for a copy of this. Yeah. And it was like, because this was around the holidays. This was in my stocking for Christmas. Oh, that's so good. My brother got it for me. Oh, that's so good. And I'm like, oh, I'm going to keep this for something. And now it's this. This is before standup. Yeah.

That's crazy. That's so great. That's so great. My buddy Marty is the one who convinced me to get on the grass hill. He's the one who convinced me to do stand-up for the first time. Oh, yeah? Yeah. After this. Yeah. Marty Coulter. You might as well go and do stand-up. That's what he said. He said, at least go up there and tell this story. Yeah. Because I've been talking about wanting to try stand-up for a while.

Well, it's good to go tell this story, which has led you into all the other stories. Like, you know, I always tell you, your dad fixing the swimming pool. Yeah. It's one of the best stories I've ever heard in my life. Thank you. Yeah. We used to meet, I would listen to it, we would cry. You ever heard his? Uh-huh. Yeah. That's like my free bird now. Yeah. In fact, I just performed at Zanny's. If I don't, I've actually had people mad at me for not telling the story. Yeah.

So now I'm almost feel like I'm obligated to do it every session. You should. It's, it's, it's, you know, you have, you definitely have stories. You can tell when you have stories that you don't,

want to retell but that one i just is funny every time i hear it which for me too is like if it's i see this happening in my head every time i start telling it and it kind of i get joy out of it that way because i'm remembering that dad that thing that happened his face all the crap he had on his back and the hose yeah like i see it and i'm just start i start giggling and

And I think that helps the story. But it's one of them stories too, though. Like if the crowd's not on board in the beginning and you're like halfway in, you're like, oh, I've got to fit in. Checks are coming out. Oh, yeah. Maybe half listening or whatever. And then it's like, what did I miss? And now you're doing all this stuff that they don't even know what started, you know? So I got to try and do that not during the check drop. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's almost like you just do it.

It's like when the checks come out and then just you close on it? I can. I have. Yeah. I would almost be like that. I'll tell the story and I'll get out of it. Yeah. It's almost like just a thanks for everybody coming. It's such a good story. And so we're posting. Do you have a thing you do for check drops or do you try not to get to a bit when you think that time is happening? Yeah. I mean, yeah. So check drops, I would do...

You know, you have to do it. That's the worst part about headlining. It's unreal, dude. It crushes you. And I would usually just try to battle through it. When I recorded my first album, Yell That By A Clown, I had told the Davy Street story, if anybody remembers. But I had this big, long five-minute story. And so when I told it, I told them, I was like, just don't drop checks during this because we're recording this album. Because it's a long story. The beginning is not that funny, but it's setting up.

And then it gets really funny. Yeah. And then, I mean, right when I, so I was like, well, then I was like, what time are y'all dropping checks? Yeah. And they're like, we're probably dropping them at like 35 minutes or something. So I was like, all right, so I'll just do it before you drop.

And then, I mean, I would start it and they'd be like, well, we just dropped it 30 anyway. I go, that's good. It's hard to time that. You know what I mean? It's not that hard because you want to go just drop it 835 and they're like, well, we just decided to do 830. I mean, for you, if you don't know, like if you're like trying to look at the room. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's what it was. It is hard. Yeah. And so he was just trying to like, because we were recording that album and then, yeah, it was brutal.

We're posted. You had that clip posted. Which one? Your pool. Yeah, it's out there. Yeah, yeah, because we're posted. Go to my YouTube. Tons of stuff there. Yeah, go to his YouTube, subscribe. All right. Paul. Oh, wait. No, Tim Agee. No, Will. Will. At the top. Yeah. Will Wilson. Oh, boy, hang on. Oh, okay, go ahead. I was going to take turns with that last name. Okay, I'll go. Who sent you?

That's a bubble gum, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Hewson. Truett. Truett. See, that's like two different... Truett, fruit, Truett. Hewson Truett. So that's like two different people. Like this guy is either Hewson Truett or if he's Hewson Truett...

He might live where you live. Yeah, he could. You know what I mean? Yeah. There's a lot of Truitts where I live. Yeah. I don't even like all the Truitts. Yeah. The Truitt family? Most of them are bullies. Yeah. I played Finnish baseball for about 10 years ago, and it is easily the most confusing sport. The best players are the fastest ones. You hit the ball and can run as many bases as possible before the fielder

gets the ball back to the pitcher. If you don't think you can make it to the next base, you can stay put. Multiple people can share a base at a time waiting for the right hit to advance. Last but not least, if you hit the ball too far, you're out.

Whoa! I've never heard of this in my life. So the story behind this, John, is somebody came over when baseball was just being invented, and they watched it, and they're like, I'm going to take this back to my country. And they go back, and they completely botched it. But it's blossomed into a pretty popular sport. Wow. That's a little different from baseball, obviously, but still essentially the same thing. I would love to watch this. Yeah, I'd love to play it. I bet it's a fun one to play, like when you're just playing with friends. Mm-hmm.

So you can share. How many people can be on the base? As many as you want. As long as they're touching it. As long as they're touching it. Stacked on top of each other. But first base, you run by, where's home? Home is where it should be. Home is where it should be. That's where the heart is. So first base, if you listen to this, first base is just short of third base. Oh, wow. I'm just now noticing that. It's a little bit left of the mound. Yeah. So the pitcher stands that close?

The pitcher, I think, just kind of throws it up like a soft pitch. I mean, look where the catcher is. Yeah. The catcher's where the first baseman's supposed to be. What the... So the pitcher just lobs it up in front of the guy. Yeah, yeah. And he just whacks it. Yeah, I think it'd be fun to play. Like, it's kind of crazy. It'd be fun to play with kids. That's true. And I get the idea. Like, I understand this guy goes back, he's like, that game's great. I mean, don't, like...

you know, you don't get to write stuff down. You can't look stuff up. And by the time, by the time he goes from here to, was that Finland? Yeah. By the time he goes to here to Finland, it's like seven months later. And he's like, oh, golly, almost forgot. I got a new game for our country. Yeah.

And he's like, I think, where was first base? He goes, it was over there. And they go, are you sure? Because it doesn't seem like. Yeah. And he goes, no, no, it's over here. It's over there. Don't even, I don't want to talk about it. First base, done talking about first base. First base is right in front of third base. Let's go to second base. Where's that? He goes, that one was pretty far away. And so then he points out, like he goes, I mean, just imagine him like trying to remember all these rules. Oh, there's supposed to be a catcher.

Where did that guy go? I just put him out there. Yeah, like he's catching the ball that the guy hits. So that's amazing how deep the field goes as well. Yeah. So like the outfield is bigger than the rest. Yeah. I mean, it looks like

It's a big square. It's infinite. Yeah. Like it just keeps going. But it's too far. But that's what's funny is like, uh, to, he goes, you know, like he goes, how far back does it go? And he just walks and he goes, but right here, this feels right. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Anything longer than this, then you're just showing off. Yeah. Don't hit it out of the park. I love it. All right. We get a Thanksgiving episode coming.

Oh, boy. Tim Agee. Only the Nate Land podcast would include a 30-minute discussion of the Friday the 13th films on the Thanksgiving episode. We just went through all those. Oh, nice. Yeah. I'm going through right now, going through Olympia Has Fallen. Olympus? Olympus. Yes. Olympus. I talked in Olympia Has Fallen, and it wasn't coming up, and I was like,

Is it Olivia? That was a guy who just spilled a beer. Yeah. Olympia? What is that? I think it's a beer. Olympia is a beer? It's in a city in Washington. It's that as well. Oh, it's not like a... That's a much lower stakes movie than Olympus has fallen. Yeah, Olympia has fallen. I thought that fell years ago. It's been. Again? He goes, again? Yeah. My cousin used to drive to there. I think he got shot. So...

Yeah, Olympus has fallen. Now, wasn't there two of those? Oh, there's three. So I did London has fallen last night, and I'm going to do the third one. Angel has fallen. I'll do the third one tonight or tomorrow. And Angel has fallen? Yeah. It's just fun. They're just dumb and fun. Wait, that's a real one, though? The Angel has fallen? Yeah. I heard about that one. Yeah. I'm just trying to find. Was London has fallen? Was that about the Queen? No. No mention of the Queen, actually.

On the Royal Family episode, we talked about when she dies, the code word is... I thought it was London is falling. Maybe it was London Bridge Down or something like that. Yeah. London Bridge is falling down. The oldest person alive has died. That's what they're saying. Just say who it is. What's her name? Who's the old lady that lives in that building? Yeah.

Yeah, she's dead. Okay. What's your Friday the 13th then? I mean, you're talking about those. Oh, yeah. We talked about space. When he goes to space. Oh, God. I actually make sense. I forgot about that one. Yeah. That's great. It's one of the most plausible ones. Like, where you go, all right. Everything that goes on too long needs to go to space. That's how they should all end.

Yeah, metaphorically and literally. Yeah, just get them out of here. Get them out. Paul Antonio, this is the Jason Movie of Podcast. It takes almost all two hours to get on the topic of the episode, and viewers keep coming back to the lake knowing full well that we're going to witness some well-understood topics get murdered by undead ignorance. Ignorance. Like...

Well, yeah. It looks, the word ignore is in that. Yeah. Ignorant. That's a really funny comment though. That is a very funny call. Good job, Paul. Someone gave us one star review because they said it takes us so long to get the topics, which I love the fact that someone actually listens to this to learn information about a particular topic. I want to hear about Thanksgiving. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, it says you're under informational category, right? Educational. Educational, that's right. There's some in there. It just takes a little bit to go to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stick around. Yeah, stick around. Just hang out for a little bit. What's the rush? Yeah, what's the rush? Where you got to go? Yeah. Is there a lot of this? Yeah. Oh, we need to kind of go through it? We got nowhere to go. Okay. Parker Cook.

You're doing that on purpose, though.

John, I swear I wish I was. It's when I get a big word at the end and then we start that second sentence, I'm still, pasteurized is still in my head. And then I'm like, which? I don't even think about it. And then I'm in like L minutes and I'm still kind of un-pasteurized. Then I'm like, any? And I'm like, oh. Almost like I'm trying to come out of water and I'm looking for land. And I'm like, where is it? Where is it? Oh, there's some. And then I just start swimming to it. You still recording? Recording.

Yeah. I mean, you made it through pasteurized successfully. Long sentences are hard. And then you're like, oh, that was great. I made it through pasteurized. It's easy sailing now. Then here comes eliminates. I know. That's what I mean. That's what these people didn't understand. The Grammys, they were like, how is he messing up? The easy ones. Because you're celebrating the success of the hard one. Yeah. And you're not thinking. I'm not thinking.

I'm not thinking. Any bacteria present before it's churned, and secondly, any water in the butter that may contribute to bacterial growth is surrounded by butterfat, which is... That's what your name should be. Butterfat, which is impenetrable to bacteria. Just like ketchup. Butters, I've already lost everything. Just like ketchup, butter is recommended...

to be refrigerated for quality as the butterfat will turn rancid more quickly at room temperature. I like this topic, though. Yeah. I don't like going to restaurants where the butter is too cold and you can't actually spread it. Yeah. So you got to get there early and set it out so it melts a little bit. You know what I mean? So if I got a reservation at 9 a.m.,

I go like, can I just be there at 7 and just take the butter out of your fridge? Just get it out. And just put it on the table. I'll come back two hours later. Yeah, I'm not eating now. I'm just putting the butter out. We don't have you until 9 a.m. I know, I know. I still want the 9 a.m. But... Where's your butter?

Where's your, yeah. Where's your, can I go back to your kitchen? Yeah. Yeah. Cause I can't spread this on my toast. It's breaking the bread apart. Yeah. It destroys your bread. Yeah. But my mom keeps it in the fridge. I don't know if I've ever made a reservation at 9am before for a place. I don't know either. I don't, I don't want to go anywhere at 9am. Yeah. Ever. But there is something to like keeping the butter out. Do you guys, do you put it in the fridge?

We keep ours in the fridge. Yeah, I do too. John Heffron's lady keeps it out. And I was like, oh, can you do that? I guess so. I guess so. I wish you could. Nate leaves all his condiments out of the fridge. Except butter. But ketchup I don't put in the refrigerator. I'm cool with that. Yeah. I like it better that way. You don't use it. You don't use ketchup. The only time you have cold ketchup is at someone's house. That's true. Yeah. Why do we do that? Because...

That's how mama did it. Butterfat. Yeah. The congealed bacteria. Nate Knight. I was raised on a refrigerated... Is that a real name? Nate Knight. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good name. It is a good name. Nate Knight. I was raised on a refrigerated margarine. Does anybody say margarine? I would walk out of your house. I think he... I left out any unnecessary comments to make it shorter, but I think he said he couldn't afford real butter. Oh. And margarine... I thought margarine was more expensive. It was cheaper?

No, margarine is the cheap alternative. Oh, and I guess we had margarine. We just called it butter. Am I right? I think you're right, but I think we just all call it butter. I call it butter, but we were definitely buying margarine. So technically, yeah, you're right, Nate. It's like a nickel more. Yeah, I don't know how much, yeah.

Yeah, how much he goes up. How much he's saving a year. Was that, yeah, your family? That would be very funny. Your family, you're like, what the line was drawn with the butter? You're like, if y'all want two cars in this family, then we're going to be eating margarine. Right.

If you're fine with one car, we can do butter. Yeah. Do you want to go to college? Yeah. It's margarine for four years. Now's the time to say you're seven. Now's the time to decide. Do you want to go to college or do you want butter? Yeah. Right. For your rolls. It's going to be cold. It's going to be cold because we need it to last as long as we can last it. Or we can do margarine. Everybody goes to college. Yeah. Everybody decides it's a family. Yeah. Hmm.

I was raised on a refrigerated margin, but when I started living with my girlfriend, I took one look at the butter being left out in a container on the counter, soft and always ready to easily spread. And I thought, that makes sense. Never turned back. Highly recommend leaving butter out. Life-changing. Nate Knight, hero. Nate Knight. I agree. Well, I bet Nate now, dude, like if you grow up eating just the poor, that's like the stuff that you remember, but...

having to buy because no one had money you didn't have money when you grew up is the stuff that you're like well I'm buying the real like it was like soda like you're like well I'm going to drink Diet Pepsi I want name brand because it was like sometimes we'd not have to I don't think we could always have you know sorry Diet Dr. Thunder yeah you're like no no there's a point I feel like we always had some like but like yeah I'm trying to think I always liked that with syrup

Yeah. My mom always bought K-R-O syrup. K-A-R-O syrup. I guess it's fine, but I found out later that's like the cheap syrups now. Like when I saw, you know, yeah, see that? You guys eat that? Oh, that's crazy. K-R-O syrup. Diet Coke bottle. Yeah. Yeah.

so that's what we had on pancakes and waffles I thought at the time it was good and people tell me that's the cheap crap so then I'm like oh what is this buttersworth over here I'm getting that now so from now on I'm like to your point I get the good stuff you go I want the good stuff I'm stepping up no more K-Road for me yeah that's good congratulations thanks man uh

Do Aunt Jemima now? Sure. Yeah, I don't think you can. Whatever. Oh, yeah, if it's still there. Canceled. Yeah, canceled. I had nothing to do with that. That was a trick question. That was a trick. You're done. You're done, John. I put it on my Uncle Ben's. Yeah. Nate LaPierre. With margarine. With margarine.

Margin sounds like you're an aunt. Margin's coming over. Aunt Margin. Aunt Margin's coming over. Here we go. She's always got a migraine. Aunt Margin. Can y'all turn the lights off before she walks in? Turn the lights off. All right, we'll get them off. Nate Lapierre. Lapierre.

Jelly is made from the juice of a fruit and jam is made from the fruit itself. That's the difference. That's a big difference. I like jelly. I don't like jam. What about a cranberry sauce? I don't even know. Why is that called a sauce and not a jam or a jelly? What's the difference? Because it's not a sauce, is it? I don't know. Is it in a can? I don't really do it that much. What about preserves? Thank you. Now we've got four. We've got preserves, sauces, jams, and jellies. See, I like just the... I like the juice. I like, you know... Yeah, which would be the...

Which one is that? That's like a syrup. I don't like when you go somewhere and they're like, we make our own syrup. And I'm like, I'd rather you not. Yeah. I've had yours yet. I know what's good. I know what I like. I know what I like. I don't want to go when someone's like, we do our own kind of syrup. And they just think everybody's going to like that. And you're like, it's going to be, it's weird. Yeah. I was, I really, I love pancakes. You've ruined them for me.

It's like, can you bring both over? Let me just, so it looks like you're trying it. There's a place I was at, and I would ask them, they bring the ketchup. I joke about ketchup, but they have real fancy ketchup. And I'll be like, do you all have Heinz back there? And they would bring out little bottles of Heinz. I'm like, you should be just giving this out. Yeah, this should be the default. Don't be, I mean, it's like chunky. It's like, what are you doing? I ate at this place this weekend, and I was like, I got a Diet Coke. And they go, we actually have it. We have our house-made ketchup.

And I was like, God's take water. Yeah. House made soda. Yeah. Who's making their own soda? Yeah. Some places. Oh, wow. They go, they do. Yeah. They do their own. And you're like, you're like, I don't even want to be here. Like,

Yeah. Like, at least give me something I've heard of. Yeah. I'm about to eat stuff I don't know. Right. Yeah, this is our version of Coleslaw. Yeah. I hate our version. Yeah, our version. Our take on it. I know what a club sandwich is. Yeah. I don't know what your version of a club sandwich is. It needs to have these main ingredients. You get something you don't know you're supposed to ask off. You're like, well, I didn't expect to have to ask that off. You know? I forget, like...

get uh trying to think of what something that sounds would be like if you had bananas on your pasta and you're like what dude i would have said no bananas i didn't even know you could i that was out of my there are a million things that i have to think of to take off of this thing so what do you you have to ask every time now yeah i had it dude i stayed uh when i was in la

when I got Grammy nominated, a lot of people, in case y'all weren't listening at the beginning. That's right. But they, when I was in LA, I ordered a kid's, for the hotel, I ordered a kid's sundae. I'm trying to

Be like, I want the most basic, like... Was Harper with you? No. No. No. That's for you. I ordered a kid's sundae and I get them to throw a couple extra scoops on it. Sometimes in these hotels, and it'd be like, you end up spending like 30 bucks and you're like, you're like, what are we, what are you doing, dude? Like how, yeah, I'll just go buy my own.

And then, so they bring it up, right? Ordered kids sundaes, no whipped cream, no cherry. I don't like any of it. I just like vanilla. I'm very plain with my ice cream. I love ice cream, but I'm pretty plain with it. And so vanilla, chocolate syrup, they bring it up, fruit under it. No mention that they were even going to do that.

So I'm like, dude. Sabotage. I didn't order adult dessert. Like adult dessert, you have to be like, don't be fruit. Don't be weird about it. But with the kids, I thought for sure they ain't going to throw fruit on it. Because I had an adult one one day and they had fruit. And I was like, whatever. That's just par for the course. That's what they do with adult stuff. That's what I call a parfait. Parfait. Parfait for the course. Parfait for the course. Parfait for the course. But the kids, I was like, what are y'all doing? This was the night before the –

Because the next, I ate that and then announced those Grammy things. That's what I did. That was my, that was within eight, like basically within eight hours of me eating that and being pretty upset. I told them about it. Well, it's like they tried to hide the fruit in it. It's all just, yeah, the scoops were all under the fruit. Yeah. So I eat just ice cream and I leave all the fruit in there to like send a message. Yeah.

to be like, don't be doing this. Don't be throwing fruit. Let them know. Don't throw fruit on a kid's Sunday or say it. Yeah. By the way, we have in LA, it's like y'all live in that made up of a world. You think we're all just eating fruit on our ice cream everywhere we go.

No one's doing it. They're trying to sneak passion fruit in the tea out there. I never liked that either. Yeah, you're like, what are you doing? Passion fruit is. I've never seen that in my life. Where do you get the audacity? That's what you say to them. How do you come back here and look me in the eye and set that down and don't think I'm going to say something? I'm a little assaulted. Mark Kelly, ketchup has vinegar in it, so it can be left out, but ketchup in the U.S. does have a bunch of sugar and other stuff in it, so it's more fresh if you keep it in the fridge. In the U.K. and Australia, most people keep it out. Interesting.

Have you ever had Vegemite? Yeah, I have. Yeah. I went to Australia. Yeah. So you've had, yeah, I've had some just recently. Yeah. Not as bad as I thought. When I hear people say Vegemite, they go, oh, it's the worst. I don't know how they eat that. It's just a salty, nice little, you know, it's pretty good. Yeah. It sounds not good. It doesn't sound good. Like vegetable. Yeah. Vegemite. Yeah.

Jessica Turner, I literally love you all so much, but I hope nobody seriously takes food safety advice from Nate. I hope they don't either. It's a public service announcement. Food safety. Guys, do not be. She was losing sleep. Finally, Trent Stewart being raised in a preacher's home. The rapture was a hot topic. One day when I was about 12, my mom hid behind the shower curtain while I was searching through the house for her, calling for her in a worried voice. Finally, what felt like hours, she came out from behind the curtain and she told me she was making sure my heart was right.

Now I do this to all my daughters. Good times. Oh, my gosh. My heart was right. Did you ever have any rapture worries? Did you grow up? Oh, yeah. It was a big Southern thing. Yeah, of course. I'm sure everybody had rapture. But it was a big thing where if you just walked outside, you're like, where is everybody? You're like, did it happen? Right. Yeah, it just happened. I didn't know about it. Or you didn't get picked. Yeah.

Oh, there's that. Yeah. So that was, that's what I understand. His heart was right. Like if he didn't get picked, it's too late. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, yeah, I don't know. Can't get a, it's just fun. I think it's fun. I don't think it's, you can redo the rap. I think it's fun. Yeah. Well, maybe it's saying like, that's what it's going to be like. If your heart's not right, you're going to be alone. So maybe that's like, get your heart right. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll try it tonight. Uh,

So, John... Oh, yes. We got these. Oh, yeah. Bait Nargetsy. Oh, I just now noticed that, dude. I think you've noticed it, yeah. I've been staring... I didn't even notice it. Yeah. Does that happen a lot? Why does... I think he just... Yeah, they just did it to be funny. The joke is that you have dyslexia, so you... Oh, that's true. That's right. That's a great joke. I didn't even get the joke. That's perfect. That's unbelievable. I'm actually... This is... That's hilarious. If you didn't know...

If that weren't your last name, I mean, Bargatze. Yeah. Could you read it and get it right? No. No. That's why I don't, if someone says it wrong, I don't read it. You just don't get mad. Our standard is, would the guy turn around? Yeah. If you're walking down the street. So if you're walking down the street and you say a name, would he go, what's that? Or would he turn around and be like, that's all you need. All right. It's enough. No, but you're probably the level. I said, John Ripe. Yeah.

I think that's enough for you to go. It would be. I wouldn't turn around though. But I would go like, hmm, someone thinks I don't know this person because they got my name wrong and I don't want to talk to them. Oh, yeah. So that probably happens to you though. You probably get recognized and people, you're trying to get from point A to point B really fast. Yeah.

And someone's like, hey, babe! And you know... Or they're going, hey, hey, hey! They're not saying your name, but they know it's for you. You know it's for you. And you're like, no time for this guy. That's not my name. I call. I'll let them... I'll talk to them. Even if you're in a hurry to get somewhere? I talk to everybody. I get just... I mean, if I was just running somewhere, I would tell them. I'd be like, oh, man, I appreciate you. And if I had to run somewhere, but... They did...

I get called Nick. Nick. So the people call me Nick. I recently had a corporate gig I did. The guy goes like, he goes, Nick, that was so great. And I just go, thanks, man. I appreciate it. And I just let it go. Yeah, because then it's like you're making them feel... I don't want to make them feel bad. I don't... What do I... You have nothing to gain out of that. I don't care. I don't care.

And he called me Nate later. Yeah. So then he figured it out. Then you're like, he doesn't say anything. I like knowing it because it's kind of funny for them to call me Nick and then come back and call me Nate. And I know someone talked to them. And they go, I met Nick back there. And they go, it's not Nick, it's Nate. And he's like, I called him Nick. And he's like, maybe he didn't hear you. I like thinking all that went on. Go call him Nate a bunch. Because we'll call Nate a bunch. Nate, Natey. Nate, Nate, Nate, Nate.

There's a guy at Planet Fitness I work out at who called this one guy, his name was Brad, called him Stan for a long time. And I'm working out on the treadmill. He starts talking to me. He's like, oh, look, there's Stan over there. And I'm like, what?

What are you talking about? Like, Stan. I'm like, that's Brad. Yeah. And he freaked out. He goes, I've been calling him Stan for like the last couple of years. Yeah. I was like, he probably did the same thing. He just didn't want to correct you. What does this encounter is not enough for me to correct you all the time.

Yeah, you're not like friends. Yeah, right. You just call them that. If that happens, you got to just go, dude, I'm so sorry. I've been calling you Stan for some reason. Yeah, you just have to own up to it. You just have to own up to it and be like, it's my fault. But you don't want to make them thin to you because you're like, I don't want them to feel bad. Yeah, exactly.

Because it can come off like you don't care about the person. And so you don't want it to be like, I do care. Just moving forward, that's FYI. No biggie. No biggie. It's John. Yeah. Just as we head forward. In case we ever hang out longer. Yeah. The janitor at my high school, he's like the facilities manager. I always knew him as Ken.

Ken Bilbrey. And I found out that like 12 years ago, the principal started calling him Ken by accident. Wow.

And it just became his name. And now, if you meet him now, he introduces himself as I'm Ken. I'm Ken Bilbrich. That's just what he goes by. I mean, this is... He changed his name. What's his real name? I don't think he legally changed it. I don't know his real name. I've known him for a while now. He's just Ken. Yeah. He's just Ken now. He almost... He might like it. Like, you know, like separate... Like, I could see someone being like, yeah, man, it's kind of fun. He's a witness protection. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

you know there's a ken doll it's supposed to be good looking yeah yeah sounds like a strong name uh so y'all have breakfast baits aaron aaron the gal weber this is a guy logan hamsley who's a podcast fan he made these uh by hand for us wow they're very cool that's very cool it's very nice that's awesome what do we got here oh yeah yes yeah they just made i love this fan art

How to Get Into Comedy, a pretty good movie. Oh my gosh. How good is that? That's very good. Oh, wow. This is from Brandy Coy in Raleigh, Indiana. Wow. How good is that? Yeah, that's great. Are you going to put that up anywhere? Yeah, yeah. We'll frame it and we'll put it up. Trash can? I might actually let my... I'm going to see. I might let my dad...

That's pretty cool, for real. No, it's awesome. Because that's your dad in the picture. Yeah, it's because my dad in the picture. So I might give it to my dad. You might be a Christmas present. We have on my podcast. My dad will see this on your podcast. We've got these two interns. Tell them not to watch it. And we have a fake wall behind it. It's a wall. It's called a fan art. I call it a fan art wall. Anytime people put stuff, send me stuff, I just put it up there. Yeah, we need to do that. We might do some of that here. Yeah.

I need to try. I'm loving this. I'm loving this wall. I've noticed I'm in two of the posters that you got over here. Yeah. So I'm going to take one. Oh, the comedy festival. So my first TV credit. So we're here with John Reap. I,

I mean, we're kind of blown past. I'm assuming a lot of people know you. He's got a podcast, Countryist with John Reap and one with John Heffron. John Heffron. Heffron and Reap. Heffron and Reap. And number one and two podcasts in the world. Yeah. I just saw Heffron in Royal.

Royal in Detroit. Oh, he told me that. Yeah. Yeah. He was playing near you. Yeah. And then, uh, Bert was not far. It was in town. Burr was in town. It was crazy. I didn't see Bert. We ate with Burr the next day. Yeah. Uh, but yeah, everybody was there. And so my first, uh,

TV show that I ever got was the CMT Comedy Stage. The poster's there. We taped it at the Belcourt Theater in Nashville. And John Reap was one of the comics on it. And it's a very... It was fun. It was fun. I remember... So when I did it, people...

Everybody thought I just worked for CMT. I remember you telling me this. It's funny, dude. It's very funny. Because what you were wearing, it didn't look like you were dressing up. It looked like you could have been a stagehand. It was like a lot of dark on dark color. Yeah, what was I? I think before you put the button-up shirt on, maybe we were hanging out.

Yeah, I don't know. And you're not like a loud, boisterous, over-the-top kind of person. No, no. I said, well, y'all knew each other. So at this point, I've been doing comedy, 2007. I've been in comedy four years. Right. And so like, and y'all all knew each other. So I didn't know everybody. Yeah. And yeah, so I just sat in the corner. And I mean, I remember when I went up, I think it was very funny. They were like, oh, I thought he worked for CMT. Look at you, man. Yeah. Wow. How old were you when you did that? That's when it happened.

2007, so I was born in 79. 15 years ago, so you would have been 27? 27. Okay. Well, you look, I like the beard. Yeah, it's gotten better. Do you, I mean, you didn't always have the beard, so what made you, what was the choice? When did you decide to go beard? I don't know if I could have grown one back then. Oh, yeah.

I guess I could have a little bit. I never tried. I always liked shaving. I never minded. So why do we have the beard now? What made that? I just grew it. It was like a kind of certain thing. And then I lost weight. Exhibit A. Yeah, it was not good. I was kind of floating around back then. Well, I remember like... I looked like I was always just like...

You're like, you filled up, buddy? I just always look filled up. When you're just always bloated every day. Does it ever get out of you? Not really. Keep it up here in the face. It was all that. That's what I did. I covered it up. You just do it that way. That was our first time I met you. That's right. Greg Hahn was on that episode. That was the highest energy dude

I mean, I haven't seen him in a minute, but he's like too much energy. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's crazy. Yeah. He's, I mean, very funny. Yes. And he did, he's like a very fun comic to watch. Like it's just, it's crazy. But there's, yeah, I mean, it was a great, you know, Vic Henley comic.

Rest in peace. Greg Warren, Gary Mule Deer has been around for it, Mike Armstrong. But that's all the comics that was on the series or whatever. But we only did, we were on, it was me, you, and Greg, and who was the other person that was actually on our set? Maybe it was...

Adam A? Maybe it was Adam A. Oh, no, John Wesley Austin. I remember meeting him. That's right. It was John Wesley Austin. Yeah, yeah. Because this was back when Bob and Tom, like a lot of comics here were on Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom was huge. Yeah.

And so it was a great... I mean, I knew everybody because of Bob and Tom. Because at that point, I was listening. Bob and Tom was what I was listening to right when I was about to start comedy. So I would hear all these names. And I was like, I can't believe I'm getting to meet these people. And I got to do it in Nashville. I got to stay at the hotel by Vanderbilt. The one that looks over there. I've never been... At that point, it was... Even though I lived there, you were like, oh, I got to stay in the hotel. Definitely. I've never...

You know, that's going to be crazy. And it was like, when they went to my parents, I think, went to the taping. It was fun. I remember my set coming off stage and Melissa Peterman was interviewing people. She was the host. Very funny lady. And she does a lot. She's good at improv. Yeah. So she was like cutting it up. But I heard, like during my set, I heard a loud noise go off. Like just a big bong, like something happened. Yeah.

But I ignored it. I was like, well, this is TV. Just keep going in case they cut it out. When I came off stage, she was like, got the mic in my face. I'm like, what was that noise? So when I go back and look at this, I'm like, dude, I'm so rattled.

Like in the interview after my set. But she was just trying to like, oh, I don't know, I heard a big... And she went with it. I felt like, is she in on this? Did you make this noise? So she was so good at improv-ing, I didn't know that she didn't have anything to do with it for a minute. But that's what I remember from that. She's great. Did you drop this? What? On purpose? Did you try to sabotage my set? Yeah. That is like you get... We had, in LA, we had a woman that was...

Had a lot to drink. And just would not quit talking in the front. And so loud. And that was like... You can lose your track because it's like she's talking. And I try to usually just talk over it. And then usually that calms it down. But she was just so...

you know, out there that it didn't, nothing mattered. Like, uh, she shouldn't have been there and they, but so she did it, but you start like your male mess, your whole joke up. Like you'll be like, cause you start the joke and then you can't stop hearing her. And then you can only hold off for so long. Then you're like, I don't even know where I'm at. Yeah. You know, so I'll do a thing. If I, if I feel something happening, um,

And I'm like, well, it's not to the point where I have to address it. It's just sort of like, maybe it's just bothering me and not the whole room. Yes. But it's enough to bother me that it ruins even my set. And I'm like, okay, once I get that light, I know I'm like, I'd like to get the light around 35, 40. And I feel like, okay, my time is over. And then if it's still happening, I go, what's going on? And I'm like, I'm going after this table now for 10 minutes because it's been bothering me. Yeah.

Yeah. I do that too. I get a light around that. I would always get a light at like, uh, 35, 40. I like a light like that. I do too. You do an hour. I try to do less than an hour. Yeah. Yeah. Less than hours. An hour at the most. I've done longer, but I don't like doing that. Yeah. Yeah. I'd rather just do the time and leave them wanting more if you can. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's usually, uh,

Plus, I'm worried about the staff. They want to get out of there. Yeah, yeah. An hour is great. And then, yeah, I would always get a light. If anybody doesn't know, they light. So a lot of times they light comedians from the back of the room. It can be, sometimes it's a bulb. Sometimes it's just someone flashing their cell phone in the back of the room. There's signs. Some places will have a sign that clicks. I think one place had, didn't one have a streetlight?

Yeah. Oh, that's Last Laugh. No, was it Ernie's? No. Erie, Pennsylvania. Last Laugh. Junior's Last Laugh. Junior's Last Laugh. I think that's what it is. Dude, I just had a smirk. And they all sounded like comedy brothers. They probably all exist. Oh, yeah. They're all on the old circuit. What was it? Last Laugh? No, it was Ernie's. Bill's.

You know what? Cheetahs. It was cheetahs. And you're like, all right. My friend's prank called my mom and dad's house when I first started doing comedy. They called and left a voicemail. And then I came home and mom goes, you got to listen to this. I think you got something here.

And it was my friend. He's like, oh, yeah, my name is so-and-so. I work over here at the Chuckle Hut up here. He left this long voice of big opportunities for me. And I came home because mom was like, you got to hear this. I was like, I've never worked in New Jersey. And then she plays it like, that's Wes. Chuckle Hut. Is there a Chuckle Hut? I don't think so. I feel like there shouldn't be. That's the one that everybody says. The Erie, Pennsylvania. I have a great...

Juniors, right? Juniors. Yeah, it was a cool... When we went there... Because you have to be clean. And then they... I was with Soder. If Soder ever comes on here, I'm sure he'll tell this again. But I was with Soder. Soder was opening for me. This was forever ago. So we go and we do the show. And so the first night, the host...

is just a person they draws a name out of a hat. They get a host to show. So you can put your buddy's name down as a joke and put it in there. And they call him and go, you won. Do you want to host this show? And then the guy's like, all right, yeah, I'll do it. And so the guy came and did it. So I didn't know this. And the first night, I mean, this is when you're, and I'm not trashing juniors. Juniors was great. But it was like very just funny. I don't even know if they still do this. Yeah.

But it was, they would do it. I didn't know, like no one's coming to see me. You know, we're just names. You're just a comedian. And so we get there and I'm talking to the host and I'm like, all right, how long have you been doing it? He's like, once. And he goes, and I was like, you've done it once? He goes, well, tonight. I'm going to do it tonight. And I'm like, tonight's your once? You've never done it. Tonight's your first time? He goes, yeah, pretty nervous. And we're like, you're hosting this show? Yeah.

So he goes up. He's got to bring Soder up. He goes up and does, I mean, I don't know, three minutes. Murders. No, no, no. No, like three minutes. And so the point of that is you're supposed to be clean. Well, when you put someone new, they're not going to be clean. So, I mean, he's just filthy. And he does three minutes and he goes, Dan Soder's coming up next and...

And he walked away. That's what he introduced me to. He usually goes, please welcome your next comic, Dan Soder. He just goes, your next comic, Dan Soder, he's going to be coming up here. And, uh, all right. And he just left. Then Dan goes up there. Then Dan goes up and he goes and sits down in the front row with his family. And then Dan's doing like 20, 30 minutes. And now he's drinking. Starts heckling Dan. Oh my God. Starts heckling Dan. Really? Yeah. And then, uh,

And then he goes, then Dan's like, all right, when he's done, he's like, all right, you got to come back up here, man, because you got to bring up, you know, Nate. And he goes, oh, okay. And he didn't know. And then so he comes up and now he's drunk. And he then does 20 minutes. Wow.

of just who knows what just he's loose now he's confident he's confident three minutes the first one he's like well I'm not gonna he goes I won't drink you know because I won't take it serious and he just goes in there and bombs for three minutes and then he goes and drinks for 30 and just pounded him and then he's like hey y'all

do and it does 20 more minutes and it brings me up like the same way Nate Bargetzi's coming they say your name first before Nate Bargetzi he's been on stuff alright Nate there's something yeah there you go when do we clap here you just gotta go up I hate that yeah alright uh

North Carolina. That's going to be... See, that's going to be... We're going to call this a North Carolina? Yeah. Come on and raise up, take your shirt off, twist it around in your hand and spin it like a helicopter. Yeah. Know that song? Yeah. Petey Pablo? Yeah. Google that. Yeah. It's an African song. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's a popular song. It is, yeah. I met that guy once. Oh, really? Yeah. Petey Pablo, baby. Raise up. That's it. Yeah, I don't think we could. No, you don't want to. You can't really play. I think North Carolina is the first state I ever visited from Tennessee because my family, we'd go to the Smoky Mountains on vacation. And one day we drove into North Carolina and I was blown away. I'm in another state. Yeah. Yeah.

I just heard about it on television. Now I'm here. Mama, we did it. We did it. Just mama. You tell me we left. We ain't in Knox County no more. We out of Knox County and we're in North Carolina. I like the way you said it. We all went to Cherokee. Oh, yeah. To the casino? Cherokee, yeah. Before the casino. We didn't go to the casino, but we were in Cherokee. Yeah. All right.

That's where everybody would go. I never went to Cherokee, but I remember everybody would go there at 18. I didn't know you could go there then. I didn't know anything. I mean, the casino has not been around that long. The last 15 years or something. Oh, really? I thought it was when I was in high school. I don't think so. Oh. No. I mean, it's kind of new. Gambling wasn't always allowed in North Carolina. That just kind of recently happened because of, you know, it's an Indian reservation. Yeah. Yeah.

But, yeah. I've worked there many times at Cherokee. Oh, yeah? Yeah. I used to know the chief of the tribe. There's a guy named Michelle Hicks. That was his name. Yeah. He came to see me in Atlanta and other places. Yeah, I got to tell you this story, man. It's going to sound bad. Do we have time? Yeah. We just got started on the title of the show. This has to do with North Carolina. Yeah. It's the chief of the Cherokee tribe. Michelle Hicks. Michelle Hicks. Okay.

So he came to see me once with some of his friends in Asheville. Yeah. Some of the other tribe members or whatever. We all got along. We've all hung out many times. And he comes back to the green room. He's got all these guys. And he's introduced me to one of his friends. And he said, this guy, he's from Hickory. He went to one of their high schools in Hickory.

And so unbeknownst to them, and I do this all the time, when someone comes up to me and goes, oh, I'm from Hickory, I go, what high school did you go to? Because we've got like four. Yeah. And then whatever they say, I say, oh, you dirty, or whatever the mascot is. So if it were a tiger, oh, you dirty tiger. Yeah. So he happened to go to a high school where their mascot was an Indian. And without thinking, he goes, I went to St. Stephen's. I'm like, oh, you dirty Indian. And it just came out.

And I tried, I was like, what just happened? And I already know all of them. And I just tried to gloss right over it. Like, let me get you something to drink, man. Let's get the, it's all me. Whatever you say, what do these guys want? And then a year went by and I hadn't heard from him. And I was like, I got to reach out. And I did. And he was like, you know what? I just, no, they didn't, it didn't hit us like that, but we did notice it. Yeah. Because they did talk about it. Oh, they didn't care yet. No, they don't care. Yeah. But I felt like the biggest, because it just comes out.

Like if it were Cavalier, you dirty Cavalier. It just happened to be that high school, and it just came out that fast. Yeah. Is that why you went there? How does that happen? You got recruited? Yeah. You start making it worse. Or you took over the school. Yeah. So you're only allowed to go there? I don't. Right.

Yeah, it was weird. Yeah, that's so great. The Cherokee's great. Yeah, yeah. That's the moral of the story. I feel like I need to skip the history of North Carolina and just get to the fun stuff. Oh, sure. Yeah. Let's see here. Krispy Kreme, located, headquartered in Winston-Salem. Yeah. Wow. Good stuff. Yeah. You like Krispy Kreme? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

We had a Krispy Kreme. Yeah, that was the first thing we ever did on this podcast. First thing we talked about, the first episode is about us, how many Krispy Kremes we could eat. Oh, man. I like them fresh, and I like them the next day. I like them stale, too. Oh, yeah. If we had a day or two old Krispy Kremes that have been sitting out, that's great, too. Just dipping them in coffee. They're all great. Yeah. Just a glaze, a plain glaze. I do chocolate, but...

I'm sure that's awesome. I know it is a pattern, but that's not necessary. It's like putting fruit in your ice cream. Yeah. It's like, I don't need that. I'll take it. I'm not going to knock it off. But the fruit would be healthy. It would be. And so the ice cream's not healthy. No, it's not. So it would be like putting chocolate syrup on your ice cream. Correct. Yeah. Now, if you put fruit in there, then that's unnecessary. That's unnecessary. Yeah.

Which if Krispy Kreme was like, we're selling fruit, we've got a banana on this thing, you'd be like, I'm not here for that. Yeah. I mean, if it's in there, that's going to be the last one. I won't be eating that. I want a banana, I'll stay home. Right. I came to Krispy Kreme, but I had Krispy Kreme. I get a banana anywhere. Yeah, I had Krispy Kreme Sunday.

I love Krispy Kreme. Better than Dunkin' Donuts. Oh, yeah. South is Krispy Kreme. We don't know. Dunkin' Donuts is like, I don't even understand. When I first moved up to the North, it was like, that's all they had was Dunkin' Donuts. And they're like, that's all we like. And I'm like, y'all's donuts are terrible. I know, thank you. I don't like them. America runs on it, dude. That's what they say. America runs on Dunkin'.

It's like you want to go like, guys, have you had Christmas? They apparently have. Yeah. You want to just go like, do you know what we're doing down here, dude? We are crushing it. We are crushing it. Yeah. Like Dunkin' Donuts, you're always like, I still go do it. I like them. If I need it, it's there. If it's there and I need a donut, I'll go get it. I like that. I've had people say, what about the coffee?

I've had their iced coffee. Yeah, I've had that. Coffee's good. Yeah. I get a Diet Coke with Krispy Kreme donuts. I love it. That's funny. Diet Coke. Okay. This just happened to me. I think I've reached an age where I'm now. Yes, this is me and you right here. Maybe you're doing this just now. I don't know. But coffee for me used to be just breakfast in the morning to wake up.

Or maybe if I'm in college and I'm studying for exams, I'm trying to stay awake. Yeah. I've just reached the age where I had coffee with lunch with a chicken sandwich and coffee. That is. And I liked it. Yeah. I think that's my thing now. Yeah. Do you coffee with lunch? No. No. I just drink coffee like in the morning. And then, but I won't even drink it. I'll do, I don't like it with my food.

I still like Diet Pepsi. I drink a Diet Coke or Diet Pepsi. I just want Diet Coke. Try it sometime. Try a coffee with a chicken sandwich. Let me know what you think. Have you done that? No, I just started drinking coffee in the last couple of years. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah. He had a stroke. Maybe that had something to do with it. Maybe. I didn't have a stroke, but we're still talking about it. Can we confirm he doesn't have a stroke? Bell's palsy. Yeah.

We haven't confirmed what it is, but I'm pretty sure it went in a stroke. Yeah. Really? That's good. We asked some listeners and they said probably not. That's John Heffron. John Heffron had Bell's palsy on stage during a show. His whole face started slipping down. And he just, in the middle of his act, and they had to take him to the hospital. He has a joke about like, go give me some Arby's. It looks like all his juice is coming out of my mouth. Yeah.

But he had Bell's palsy. So that's like a mini stroke. Yeah. Did you have something for real that happened? It's still ongoing. Oh, no kidding. Yeah. Wow. Like right now in this moment. In this moment. Yeah. I can't tell. You're hiding it well. That's why we sit him at the end of the table so everybody can see it. Now we want everybody to see it. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, because the cameras. That's when the audience will know it happened. When he comes in, he's sitting in this chair and I'm down there. And then he never looks at the camera. He's always just like, yes. I didn't know you could do this. So, Bill, it would just happen like he was on stage and then everybody saw it too? Yeah. You feel it, I guess, too, right? Yeah, I think so. You just feel like you just get sleepy? Yeah. I didn't know it was that quick. You don't always recover, but he recovered.

It's just one side of your face just slips down. That's crazy. Yep. And then, man, that's so wild. And they just say, you know, hey, it's kind of like a little –

mini stroke that happens just up in your face on stage that's how much comedy he's doing yeah I mean that's just think about how much we're on stage is to go you have that no one has that happen in front of people I mean I'm sure they have it like but the odds yeah but you're like on stage that much that's true yeah yeah

The odds are that it would more likely happen on stage than not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How much this guy does stand up for the last 30 years. Yeah. Of course it's going to happen on stage. It's going to happen.

I kind of hope I die out there. North Carolina. North Carolina. Yes. All right. We can make that happen. I'm just going to OD on stage. But I'm ready to go. I'll have a show ready. Like I'll do a show. Maybe a New Year's Eve thing. Lots of people dressed up. Just pop a bunch of pills right beforehand. Time it just right.

And then I'm out. And then you're out. So you're happy and then you start these people's new year off to just... Right. They'll have a story. How was the show? Oh, this year got started off rough. Yeah. Reap died. Yeah. Yeah. Oh.

Uh, Krispy Kreme actually started in Nashville. Ooh. What? And then they moved to Winston-Salem because his favorite cigarette company, Camel Cigarettes, were in Winston-Salem. Oh my gosh. Of course. I love it. North Carolina, that's tobacco. That's tobacco. Tobacco road. Yeah, baby. Uh, Texas Pete Hot Sauce. Ooh. Manufactured in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Yeah. Uh, marketing advisor suggested it be called Mexican Joe. Oh,

Oh my gosh. But the father of the founder opposed it saying that it should be named after an American. Yeah.

So his brother Harold went by Pete. Yeah. So they called it Texas Pete. They go, we'll go Texas Pete or we'll go dirty India. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, I'm fine either way. Just put it on the bottle. I don't want to talk about it no more. From North Carolina, Texas Pete. Yeah, yeah. Why can't we go North Carolina Joe or something? Why are we going to go Texas? It was a spicy sauce. So they said it needed to be something like Mexican Joe. Okay. Pepsi started North Carolina. That's true. Yeah.

He was a medical student. Pride of the Carolinas, they say. Yeah. He was at a drugstore in New Bern. Is that how you say that? Mm-hmm. Opened his own drugstore and created a drink to aid digestion, which he was called Brad's Drink. Oh, really? Oh, I like Brad's Drink. Pepsi was originally called Brad's Drink, and then it finally took off, so they had to change it from something other than Brad's Drink. Really? I didn't know that. Brad had some digestive problems, apparently. Yeah. I wonder what it would taste like back then. Yeah.

Like, you know, did it taste? Can you tell a difference between Coke and Pepsi? I can. I can pick it out. I like Pepsi more. Pepsi Zero is pretty good too. But I'll drink Diet Coke. Like I won't, I'm not going to not have a soda. Yeah. I like Coke Zero or yeah, the Diet Coke I don't.

But I'll drink it all the time because that's what's there. Yeah. I don't mind Diet Coke. I don't like Coke Zero. Really? But they have a new Zero that I think someone said it's... Yeah, it's a good time. Were you around for the old New Formula when that happened? Oh, yeah. Yeah. You were probably really young with that. No. There was Coke and then they went to New Formula. I'm 42.

I feel like you were like, yeah, yeah. You just look great. Yeah, but that was pretty. Aaron's the one. Aaron's 20. He just turned 30. He just turned 30. New Formula Coke? I've heard of it. I don't remember New Coke. I wonder if you could find that somewhere. Have you heard Norm MacDonald's theory behind New Coke? He said, well, you had regular Coke, right? And they were using real sugar.

And they felt like we could save money if we switch it to corn syrup, but you can't just do that overnight. So what they did was they came out with a new formula. And then when they switched back to the

It wasn't called Coke again. It was called Coke Classic. It was a little bit different, and it was because of the corn syrup or something like that. So he has a whole theory about corn syrup and why they did it. So they did it just to get you off of it enough. So you won't remember. And then you go, no, no, no, this is it. And you go, finally. You're like, good. Yeah, good. It's not the same. It's not the same. Pretty brilliant. Go to Mexico because that's the real Coke. Yeah. Yeah. It's not dirty. It's good Coke. Yeah, it's good. Yeah.

The 8,000 acre Biltmore State in Nashville. Yeah. I've been there. Largest state in the U.S. Largest what? A state. A state. Yeah. Second largest? Nate's house. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That's a Vanderbilt, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's beautiful. It's huge. I've been there many times. They have their own winery. They have good wine there as well. Asheville's nice. Asheville's like the San Francisco of the South, they say. Because it's got a lot of, it's in the mountains, so it's a lot of hills you got to go through. And it's very sort of liberal, open-minded, sort of a, yeah. It's like San Francisco. Yeah. But it's beautiful. People aren't friendly. No, they don't bathe. Yeah. You know, a lot of patchouli in there. Stuck up. Yeah. Yeah.

Very confused. They go. Yeah, and they're right in North Carolina. You have mask only. That's going to be the new way how you describe a place. What is it? Mask or mask only? Or mask only? It's mask only. Okay. I get it. Yeah, it's funny. The NASCAR Hall of Fame is in Charlotte? Yeah, I've been there. We've been there. Yeah, we have a great picture of Maine Harbor.

We did one of those simulator races. Did you take that picture? Yeah. I'd frame the picture. It's like me. Who are you with? My daughter. Oh. She's in the simulation and I'm leaning in and then she's looking at me as I tell her the directions. I think he just was standing there and took it. It's like an awesome looking photo. Oh, yeah. That's awesome. That was fun, I bet, doing the simulator. Oh, it's awesome. I've never done that before. Oh, it's awesome. I've just played video games or you think it's like that, you know, where they have three screens. You thought, I guess that's what it is. But this is probably like... Yeah. Yeah.

I did. I went through it a bunch. Like I've been there. I go every time I go to Charlotte. Uh, and cause I did Ryan Blaney's podcast like a couple of years ago. Yeah. And so they do that there. And, uh, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. Was there. Uh,

And I saw him smaller than I thought. Yeah. He's not, I mean, I'm taller than him. Yeah. He just, he seems, he's got a tall build on TV. And he just has that name, the presence is like so huge. Yeah, you think like he's going to be just a big dude. You're like, it's just not a, you know him? Yeah, yeah. I've done like a gig at one of his like holiday parties before. And I've met him a couple times here and there. But yeah, nice guy. He's got a good accent. Yeah. He's got a good accent. Yeah.

My favorite accent, though, in NASCAR is probably Michael Waltrip. Yeah. Have you heard his? It's kind of like this. Yeah. Or it could be like, I'm not sure which way I fall. Yeah. I like... He was like Tiger King. Yeah, a little bit. Listen to him talk. When I won the Daytona 500, it was the same year that... You're going to get one of him. He makes a mean hug, too. He's not talking much in this interview. He likes to have a good time. Okay, here he goes. What are the rules of life?

I remember it vividly and always will because of that. He's trying to keep it straight, right? Yeah, this is like a serious... He's talking about when Dale Earnhardt died. Oh, this is an interview about a tragedy. My bad. This is the worst part. This is what his... He came out with a book...

Describing that Daytona 500, the only time he won the Daytona 500 was when his friend died making a move to get him to the lead. And his son finished second. There's both his teams. Waltrip, Earnhardt Jr., and Dale Waltrip. I mean, then Earnhardt. Darrell Waltrip is a member of where I'm a legend's golf course. I see him up there all the time. He's very nice, too.

dude. Waltrip? Yeah. I mean, just the nicest. And Michael Waltrip, we had the same manager. Oh, really? Yeah, just super, super nice dude. Just the best. But like, yeah, the first NASCAR race I ever watched the whole race of was the one Darrell Waltrip died in. Oh, really? Yeah. I mean, Darrell Waltrip. Darrell Hart. Yeah. I know what you mean. But there's someone else. What was number 20? It's not... I want to say it's number 22, but it's not now. Joey Logano, I think, is 22 now. But it was like...

There was 22 NASCAR drivers before that. Burton or? Ward Burton. Ward Burton. Go look up Ward Burton's accent, dude. Ward Burton's accent has been my favorite. That's a good one. It is so good, dude. You almost can't. Oh, Ward Burton is pissed. I bet you that's a good one. Okay, yeah, let's do that one. Yeah. It's so good.

His vocabulary. Oh, it's just like this dude's... Kind of like Boomhauer a little bit from King of the Hill. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where you can't... He don't even know what he says when he starts talking. He doesn't know what's going to come out of his mouth. It's so good. All right, go read something else. All right. Hickory Motor Speedway is referred to as the world's most famous short track.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's called the birthplace of future NASCAR stars. NASCAR stars. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Hickory. Oh, that's where they do it? Hickory Motor Speedway. Yeah. And I had never been there until I just moved back home about three years ago. Wow. And I've been a couple times since then. Yeah. It's old. It's run down, but they still have a lot of races there. There are kids driving. Yeah.

A girl just won a series there and she's like 14. These kids with braces. Sometimes I'll do an interview with them for the podcast. I'll do a thing down there. It's weird because these are children. They don't even have a driver's license. They're going 200 miles an hour. Here's Ward Burton. I don't know if NASCAR needs to do something about it. When I

Oh my God. Did he say that whole sentence without his mouth moving? Yeah. His lips don't move. He could be a great ventriloquist. Where's he from?

Yeah, he's, it's, man, I remember hearing his and you're like, oh, I love that. I love that so much. He's from Boston. His mouth doesn't work. He's born in Boston. Where did he grow up? Virginia. South Boston. Boston, Virginia, not Boston, Massachusetts. Okay. No way. Yeah. He's Southie.

The Greater Hickory Kia Classic at Rock Barn is a golf tournament. You ever heard of that? Oh, sure. Yeah. I don't know the classic. I think I drove around that. Is that track... Can you... I thought I drove in Richmond. I thought we went around Richmond. Richmond was very small. Well, Hickory, that track is not like a real... They don't have like big time races. Is there stands? Yeah. On one side? I mean, just one side. And is it flat and small? Yeah. Yeah.

Pretty much. I almost think I did. I drove around it cause it was open one day and we drove there and, uh, I remember there being like potholes though. Probably. Yeah. It's been around for a long time. I think they fixed it, but it wasn't, yeah, it was not a big trip. I do know the, uh, rock barn country club you're talking about. Uh, you would probably love it. I'm not like a big golf guy, but that's, that's the place to go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um,

The Mayberry Days is held every year in Mount Airy, home of Andy Griffith. I would love that. I went to one of those. My dad was a huge Mayberry fan. He actually bought a squad car, a replica of the squad car.

Oh, wow. And he took it to Mary Bay Day's festival. And he had all the celebrities sign the dash, the ones that were still alive sign the dash. He was in the parade. And in fact, I was working for a TV station at the time. It was before I did stand-up. Yeah. I was working at PBS. And then we did a show called North Carolina Now.

And I said, y'all got to go cover this festival. It's hilarious. And I knew my dad would be in it. So I did it just to get my dad on the show. Yeah, that's cool. And yeah, it's pretty cool, man. Yeah, that's crazy. I like you said PBS. You're like, I was doing this TV station, PBS? Yeah. We definitely were. If I say UNC TV, people are like, what is that? Is that a university? Yeah, yeah. But it's North Carolina's PBS. See, I actually know that because...

I used to work in TV news and we do regional Emmy Awards. I'm an Emmy winner, so. Oh, wow. Potential Grammy. But it was the Mid-South Emmy Awards. It was Tennessee, North Carolina, and Northern Alabama. That was the region. But North Carolina now would be nominated for stuff. Yeah. So there's a- It's the best and brightest of that- Of that group. Of that area. Did you go to Mayberry Days? No.

No, but I just saw a Mayberry Man movie. Rick Roberts plays Barney Fife in a Mayberry movie. I loved... Rick Roberts is great. Yeah, so we grew up on this. Andy Griffith. So that was the show, the black and white ones. Yes. Where you... I mean, I haven't watched them as much. I was trying to watch them with my daughter because they're very fun and there's a lot of lessons and stuff and good stuff in there. But there's nothing much funnier. Don Knotts is the funniest thing. He was...

Don Knotts was the first celebrity that died that I was really sad about. There's been others since then, but when he died, I was like, God, that hurts. I remember it hurting. I was old enough for it to hurt. I was like, man. I always wanted to meet him and Andy Griffith. Goober Pyle from Andy Griffith is a relative of mine. I remember I saw him at a wedding in Gadsden, Alabama.

I was like, that guy looks so familiar. Like, yeah, it's Goober Pyle. George Lindsay. Gomer Pyle? Not Gomer. Oh, Goober. That's Goober right there. Oh, yeah, Goober. So these are the two of them together. Goober and Gomer. Yeah. You just never hear his last name. What's funny is like Gomer's the more famous name, but Goober's probably the most famous one of them. It's the most, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. I mean, like Gomer's famous. Gomer was in a bunch of, but Gomer's a better name. Gomer had his own show. He had his own show. Yeah. Yeah.

But Goober, George Lindsay...

He was on... I did an episode of Larry the Kibble Guy's Hula Palooza Christmas special. Reno was on there, and George Lindsay was on there. Really? So I got to meet George Lindsay right before he passed away. Oh, that's... Super nice guy. Yeah, that's my relative. Yeah. Yeah, that's weird. Did you say hi to him? Did you tell him I said hi? I did. Did he ever know you were his relative? Oh, no. No. He just died a couple years ago, right? I don't know. Unless... We don't hang out, but it's one of those, like, oh, somehow he's in the family. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

To be at the wedding is... But Bonnie Five, Don Knotts. Have you ever seen the movie The Ghost of Mr. Chicken? That was on the other day. I can't turn away. If that thing is on, I have to watch the whole thing. Yeah, yeah. It's so good. Don Knotts scared is the funniest thing ever. Oh, yeah. Just him afraid. Yeah. In a haunted house, whatever it is.

Do you like Mr. Furley? Yes, totally. Yeah. Yeah, I like the other one too, the other crappy neighbor. The Ropers. Yeah, yeah, but Furley was, I mean, anything he did was amazing. Did y'all go, did y'all see the theater?

That movie he's just talking about? Yeah, Ghost of Mr. Chicken. I don't think I know. I'm talking about Three's Company now. I know. I was just joking. We're like old. Yes. I know. You go, what'd y'all do? How much were movie tickets? We sold it at the Nicolade. Yeah, the Nicolade. And you go, price has gone up, mama. And then Brian walks in right behind it. We just got back from North Carolina.

I'm traveled. I'm going to a whole other state. It's two miles in. The first baby born in the United States from the English settlers was born in North Carolina. Wow. Virginia Dare.

She was born in the Roanoke colony, 1587. What was she like? Well, some bad stuff happened. That whole colony disappeared. Oh, really? Was that Croatoan? Yeah. Good job, John. Thank you. They just disappeared. It's the vanished colony. The first colony showed up. The governor left to go back to England to get more supplies.

And then a war broke out in England, so he couldn't immediately come back. He came back three years later. They're all gone. Just the only thing they could find was a word carved into a tree that said Croatan. Yeah. What does that mean? They don't know. They don't know? There is an Indian tribe that was called Croatan that was further away. Oh. So they think they either came and killed them or took them away. Yeah. But they really don't know. There's no bodies found. There's nothing. It just disappears. But, you know, it's one of those unsolved mysteries. Yeah. Wow. I remember hearing that in the...

I mean, how crazy is it that you go, all right, dude, I'll be right back. And then you're like, three years, like, sorry. And you're like, dude, no one's here. You're like, it's been three years, man. Like, I don't, like, that's a long time. Right. I'm not going to stay in this one spot for three years. What if they're like, we lived a very happy life. We moved. They could have. Yeah. But his wife, daughter. But they didn't leave a note. You know, they could have said, hey, we moved on. Yeah, where are they going to leave it? On a tree. Stable to a tree? Like a piece of paper? This was before paper? Yeah.

Yeah. It might be. No. But his wife, daughter, and Virginia Dare was his granddaughter. Yeah. They're all gone. No one knows what... Some people think aliens got them. Yeah. I like that. I like that too. Yeah. Billy Graham Library. Yeah. In Charlotte, North Carolina. Yeah.

Lots of books in there. Yeah. Starting to fade? Starting to fade out. That's nice. Do I have the same thing? No. Do you know the miracle of Hickory? Do you know what that is? Yes. There was a huge plague or something that happened. Polio. Polio. I wasn't wrong. And a lot of people were dying and they had to make a makeshift hospital.

I think. That's right. And they were putting people up and the citizens started acting as nurses and trying to help the community, I think. That's right. Case of polio broke out and within 24 hours there were six more cases and they built a hospital in 55 hours. Yeah. Full-scale hospital. Yeah. And treated all these people and it's like,

One of the great acts of humanity ever. It's still there. They haven't changed it. It's still there. It's a dirt floor. Polio's still there in the hospital. Y'all didn't get it solved because there was no doctors helping? It was all just regular people? Just keep building buildings. Don't worry about the disease. Did y'all solve polio? You're like, no, I don't know. I had a mechanic try to get it out of me, and then he, you know...

Can you imagine if they try that now, though? Yeah. Put your mask on. I'm not putting my mask on. They built a hospital in 55 hours. Yeah, that's pretty cool. That's great. That's awesome. You know, I get... So, hickory... Everybody I started is from North Carolina. Hickory. You guys are old hickory, right? Yeah. Because I'm old hickory. So, I mean, the...

When people out there say I'm from Old Hickory, they're like, oh, you know John Reed? And I'm like, no, he's Hickory. Right. I'd get it. I mean, I still get it. Do you? Okay. Yeah. That makes me kind of feel good. Oh, yeah. Everybody knows you're Hickory. They come up to you, they think of me a little bit. Oh, yeah. That gives me a little bit of... No, yeah. I would always get it. I mean, I've always got it. Because you were Hickory. It's because on last comic standing, I said I'm from Hickory one time. Okay? Yeah.

And I shook my head and it was, you know, got a laugh. And they use that every episode coming back and coming up next, we got to get, and I go, oh, from Hickory. And so I actually ended up saying it a bunch. I only said it one time. They kept showing it. So now it's like, you think of me, it's like Hickory or, you know, get a wedge. Did Hickory like love it?

Some people liked it, some people didn't. Because I make Hickory sound like a backwoods sort of small redneck-y town, and it's not really that at all. It's sort of in the middle of the road. But there are people who don't think of themselves as redneck-y at all, who hate the fact that I made it sound that way. Do you get recognized a lot there when you go home? Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, it has to be. At least a couple times. I mean, yeah, not a whole lot. When it was last comic standing, was it just like... Well, I wasn't living there. I was in LA. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's when I would go home, definitely. Yeah. Isn't there a NASCAR driver from Hickory? Yeah. Oh, God. Hang on. There's a couple. All right. Oh, yeah. Hang on. Dang it. Dale... Earnhardt. Something or other. No, he's outside of Hickory. Well, I'm sorry. I'll think of it in a minute. Wall trip.

The UPS. Del Jarrett. Yeah, UPS. Ned and Del Jarrett. Yeah, they drove for UPS. That's right. Yeah. And then they got into NASCAR. That's what Brown could do. That's the joke. You know why North Carolina is called the Tar Heel State? Yes, because during a war. Because this is taking too Tar Heel long. They used tar to slow the other guys down or something. Someone stepped in tar. I know that much. Yeah, that's pretty good. I can't believe that they named an entire university after that name.

That's a pretty good one, though. It really worked out. Really? You want to associate yourself with speed and athleticism with a Tar Heel? What do they have there? The Rams? Is that a Ram? That's the mascot. You're right. That is the mascot. I don't think the Ram has a Tar Heel. Do y'all have a lot of Rams? I haven't seen a Ram. Dodge Rams. Dodge Ram trucks. Why are they the Rams? Do y'all have a lot of Wolfpack?

I mean, in the mountains. Y'all have a lot of Commodores running around Nashville? Yeah, well, the guy that built Vanderbilt was a Commodore. Yeah, I'm not sure why certain places choose a mascot. I think. I don't know if that's true either. Was he a Commodore? Cornelius Vanderbilt. Cornelius Vanderbilt was a Commodore. Oh, was he in the Commodores? No, he was in the Commodore. I don't know why their mascot's a ram. Yeah.

Who did you grow up? NC State. Well, I went to NC State when I grew up, though. Everyone in North Carolina pulls for Carolina. Yeah. All right. Maybe one or two good people out there. No one really pulls for a state that much.

so I grew up sort of brainwashed into believing I have to like Carolina until I tried to go to school there and they did not let me. Yeah. State let me in. And I was like, well, I have to pull for these guys. So now I pull for NC state and we just beat Carolina. Yeah. The other day. It's a great game. Did you see that? Yep. So they, yeah. Uh, so when, so that's, you know, I've actually been to their stadium, not, I just was there and I just was like, Oh, let me, I walked around y'all that Wolfpack and stuff. And I was just walking around. It was not open. I was just kind of like looking at it. Yeah. Uh,

So a lot of NC State fans are people that went to NC State that live there. Yes. Probably. You probably went to State or had someone in their family go to State. If you didn't go there, right, you probably just pulled for Carolina. Yeah.

Yeah. So if I see someone wearing a Carolina hat, I know they got that at a Walmart. Yeah. And they didn't go there. Yeah. You know, I got mine at the bookstore when I was a student. Yeah. That's what it is. I got my Vanderbilt hat at a bookstore, but anybody can go into those. That's true. Yeah. That's true. It wasn't a government issue. Like, here, you get your hat. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, I grew up liking Carolina. Yeah. And then it stayed after that. All right.

Wright Brothers were the first in flight. First flight. That's cool. Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. We claim that even though the Wright Brothers are from Ohio. Right. They were born in Ohio, but they came down to North Carolina and jumped off one of our sand dunes. And it lasted for a minute. And they said, we flew in North Carolina. Wow. Oh, really? Yeah, we stole it from Ohio. Oh, but they actually flew in Ohio? No, no. They're from Ohio. The Wright Brothers, who were the first in flight, the first airplane, flew.

are from ohio but they came to north carolina with the thing they built and jumped it off of one of our sand dunes yeah and and now north carolina says we were the first even though they're not from there yeah they just came down here but you were the first first land yeah that it jumped off of yeah that's an important thing yeah that's the main thing yeah i agree with that yeah yeah yeah no one's gonna care like certain ohio people don't why didn't the wright brothers do it in ohio

They don't have good land. What did that sand do? Is there places in North Carolina where it's warm all year? Not all. Warmer than others. If you get to the south part on the coast, we've got some good beaches. Wrightsville Beach, Carolina Beach are some good ones. Outer Banks? Outer Banks is nice. Kitty Hawk. North Carolina's second to Florida for hurricanes. Wow. Been to some hurricanes. Hugo, Floyd,

I was in college when Floyd happened. You said congrats. Yeah, that was a good thing. Good work, guys. Yeah, I'm still alive. That's cool, man. Thanks, man. Appreciate that. Good for y'all. Killed a bunch of our pigs. Oh, really? Yeah. Hurricane Floyd. They killed more pigs than people.

Pig farms just flooded. Mostly. But we survived. Yeah. Lots of free pork. It's probably a good thing, though. If you're listening to this and you're a pig, I would not move to North Carolina. Don't go to North Carolina. Because it's not good for you. No. You said it the same way, though. Kill more pigs and people. That's what y'all said. That's y'all's news down there. Well, we got more pigs and people this year.

Cape Fear Serpentarium in Wilmington had a close. That owner got murdered by his wife. Yeah. Oh, I don't know that one. I have a joke about it. What is it? What happened? It's a whole story. Was that from the movie, like Robert De Niro? No, no, no. In Wilmington, there's a thing called Cape Fear Serpentarium. And I went to it. What is a serpentarium? He had snakes and stuff. Oh, yeah. And you'd go visit it. And then that guy, so I did a whole joke about it because an alligator got out.

And then I came back, and then there's another joke. Because after that all happened, that guy's wife killed him in that place. Oh, my God. I remember this now. Yeah. Insane. That needs to be in the next Tiger King. They've got to do something on that. Yeah, yeah. That would be good. I mean, he's gone now. Yeah.

All right. I was going in on the video of you dancing. They got it thrown in there early. Barbecue. Is barbecue big in North Carolina? Yeah, they got their little vinegar based style. I'm desperate here.

Well, it's fine. Lots of pigs. Lots of pigs. So, yes, barbecue's good. I know. We ain't going to high now. What do you guys got, highways? What are y'all doing? Cars down there yet? What's going on? James Taylor. You know James Taylor? James Taylor. He's from North Carolina. Carolina is on his mind. Steve Bart live in Asheville? Yeah, I think so. Supposedly, that's what you always heard if you go to Asheville. Yeah. Steve Bartman? No, Steve Martin. Steve Martin. Steve Martin.

Steve Martin. That would have come up earlier. I'd be like, oh, yeah, Steve Martin. Wow, that came full circle. That's where he relocated. Steve Hartman is there as well. Steve Hartman. And Steve Martin. And Steve Martin. All of them are there. And Martin Short. And Martin Short. All right. Thanks for having me, man. Yeah, dude. Hey, I was so glad that you came in. I am honored. And then, yeah, I love you, buddy. I love all you guys. Where are you at this weekend? I will be in Virginia Beach at the Funny Bone. Oh, yeah. Friday and Saturday. Yeah, I've been there. Yeah. I opened for Rich Voss there. That's the only time I was ever there. Really? Mm-hmm.

I think it's been closed for a minute. Yeah. They're just now opening back up, you know. But yeah. Virginia Beach. Yeah. It's funny, bro. So I'll be there and then Lexington. I can't remember. I have to look at my website. Go to his website. Is it johnreave.com? Well, if you go to countryish.com, you can see my tour dates there as well. There you go. And you might as well check out the podcast. Might as well listen to that. Yeah. Countryish. And then Reap and...

Or what is it? Heffernan Reef. Heffernan Reef. We go live every Monday night on Facebook and YouTube. And then Country Issues is live as well every Tuesday at 8. And it's also a podcast. Yeah. Good times. You're going to be on there. I'm going to be on there. Yes. Yeah. I think we got you tentatively scheduled for next week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unless something else bigger happens for you. Huh?

That's the Oscars. That's what I'm saying. There's going to be something huge. If they get the Oscars, I'm going to get a Peabody Award. I don't even know what that is. I'm supposed to be on John Reeves' podcast. I can't. Mike, give me a Peabody. Can you win a Peabody as a comedian? EGOT is, you know what that is? Yeah. But you could get a Peabody and be a Peagot. Oh, yeah. You could be the first Peagot. How do you win a Peabody?

I think it's, who just won one? A comedian that just won one. Somebody, Jim Gaffigan maybe just won a Peabody. What is that? I don't know. Next episode. Don't spoil it. Let's see. Spool is another one. How do you say spool?

Spoil. Oh, right. Hang on. Because I want to answer it honestly. Spoil. Spoil. Spoil. Spoil. I kind of put an oil in it. Yeah. Spoil. I say oil. Spoil. People don't know what I'm saying. I'm like, can you check the oil? And they're like, man. I was being like New York and they're like, I didn't even know what that. What is oil? I wouldn't even know where to guess on what you were meaning to say. All right. We love to have you, buddy. Thanks, everybody. We appreciate everything. We love you. See you next week. Bye. Bye.

Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land podcast. Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating or comment. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land podcast.