The Dog Who Saved Christmas LIVE!
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And hello people of Chicago!

The holiday season is upon us and what better way to celebrate than the 2009 classic, The Dog Who Saved Christmas. A movie that will make you hate the holidays. It is like a really bad episode of The King of Queens. It's like the stand-ins for The King of Queens shot an episode after ours.

That like an audience member wrote. And this movie, wow, I've never taken more notes ever. I had five pages of notes and 40 minutes left. I'm glad that we're here to ignite, to talk about it because I need someone to validate that what I saw was real. And you will all do that. But

Here's the most important part. I will not be doing it alone. We will not be doing it alone. We'll be doing it with my co-host. Please welcome to the stage, Mr. Jason Manzoukas. What's up, jerks? Here we go, Chicago. How we feeling? That's right. That's right. Jason, the dog who saved Christmas, just like a reaction to...

What you saw, just a general just- I'll be honest. I think we need to start the podcast as soon as possible. It is already fading into dust in my mind. And the roar of the crowd that you just heard- We have to get started. It's for June Diane Rayfield. Give it up for June. We have to get started. Welcome, June. How are you? I'm okay, Paul. I'm okay. I knew that we were on limited time because I knew you needed to get out here too. You have to get started.

What's that? I said I knew we were on limited time because I knew you had to get out here too to talk about this movie. Thank you. I was waiting backstage. I just wanted to give a nice, clean, you know, introduction to you. That's all. So Paul, when we were watching the movie, he stopped it at one point. Just out of curiosity, were you watching it together because it's important? Okay, thank you. We were. But as we were watching the movie, he said, this movie is about dog trauma. And I...

I said it really is. And I, Paul and I have both experienced a lot of dog trauma in the last, I would say like honestly year. We've been in a year. We've had a lot of dog trauma. We've had a lot of dog trauma.

And yet I could not emotionally connect to a thing that was happening in this movie. It was like I was dead. Like I kept on asking myself, do you feel, do you bleed? Do you, I have nothing. I would believe it if you told me that wasn't a real dog. I don't feel anything. I would believe it if you told me that was a sack of potatoes. I didn't feel anything for the dog. I didn't feel anything for Bobo Kevin James. I didn't feel anything for- By the way-

I wrote it. I wrote it. I have the same note. Holy shit. I was like, this is trying to be Kevin James. Guess what I found out? It's his brother. It's his real life brother. Is it really? Yes. Who was also the king of Queens for nine years. Nine years. This feels like a movie that the Russians made.

That's like, that somehow is tricking us. You know what I mean? Like, it feels like somehow it's anti-American propaganda that they're showing there to people to be like, this is what they're doing! It's like...

It's like one of those videos that you see on TikTok where it's like, "five minute hobbies" or "five minute crafts." It's like someone saw a Christmas movie and is like, "Oh, I can do that." Here's the thing. I felt watching this movie, having just now spent however many months inside of myriad work stoppages for all these unions and all this discussion, let AI make these movies.

AI could do a better job. Let AI, the AI that saved Christmas, do it. Here's what I will say. This is, to your point, like the Russian propaganda you're talking about, this is the uncanny valley. When they showed the bloopers, the bloopers almost made me kill myself.

And I'm not kidding. The bloopers pushed me to a breaking point. I know. Because I was like, none of this is funny. When? None of this is funny. This is forced. I disagree that a human fart. Okay. Joey Coco Diaz. Give it up for Joey Coco Diaz. Is doing the Lord's work in this. The Lord's work.

In a movie that I wish AI had created. But yes, that real fart was funny. But the rest of the bloopers honestly gave me a panic attack. Me too. Because, you know, and sometimes I have found this in my own experience working as an actress in Hollywood. That the more fun people are having on set, like the less funny a movie is going to be. Like.

Like the more good times we're having. And I did say this to Paul because we kept on going to the league. Shout out the league. We can talk about it now. Chicago. Gibson. We kept on going to the league rap parties and at the rap parties every year. I don't know if you remember this, Jason, but they would show a blooper reel of all the actors just cutting up, making each other laugh.

Going off on riffs, improvising together, and just making each other laugh. And every year I'd watch this reel and Paul would never be in it. Stone face. People would be breaking and he'd be... Waiting. Waiting to get back to work. Just waiting. And I said...

I said, Paul, this rap party is for the crew and for the other actors to remind ourselves what a good time we have together. And you look like you hate being there. And I said, no, I just don't break up on set that much. And

And June's like, well, you have to do better. So if you look at the DVDs or whatever, the extras, seasons five, six, and seven, I fake laugh in all the bloopers. He had to. I was like, you have to. I'm like, I guess I have to. Wait a minute. We're in bloopers together. That's a fake laugh? It's fake. It's all fake. I didn't break you? It's all fake. I'll put you back on the list. I will break you.

A lot of Russian stuff tonight. It wasn't to me like, this isn't funny. I just never, like, we also, we performed on stage a bunch. And I'm just built to be like. And I don't make you laugh there either? No. No wonder I haven't been on On Spool.

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That's linkedin.com slash valuable to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. So the movie is about dog trauma, and yet none of us could connect emotionally to it. It's a PTSD. It is. But what's so hard is I never understood why doesn't she want a dog? Why does he want a dog? Why can't the dog stay here? Why do they want a dog to bark?

Why is that the sum total of its value? But also, why are we creating a problem that does not exist? It's an impossibility. It's like, oh, they get the perfect dog, but it doesn't bark. But here's the thing. They're nervous about the rash of wet bandit style robberies.

Midday robberies in the same neighborhood? They live in a quote-unquote mansion?

I loved every minute of it. Dean Cain, right? Dean Cain? Yes. And Joey Coco Diaz are the wet bandits. I mean, truly the wet bandits. When this movie turned into Home Alone starring a dog, I was like, okay, I guess I'll jump out the window of this hotel when I realized that police had surrounded all of this city. And I was like, uh-oh, they know. What do they know?

Here's what I will say about those wet bandits. And again, that's the plot of the movie, is that they're convinced it has to be a child, but it's a dog. At one point, Joey Coco Diaz says, look, they're leaving. They're going somewhere. Okay, they're going somewhere. And then Dean Cain's like, this will make it so much easier. Which was the most... Oh, fuck. Is it what it's supposed to be? Like,

A home invasion? If they were there, it's a funny games. Dean Cain is ready to funny games Kevin James' brother. Straight up. That's what was so scary. And then when they get to the house and the front door, they seemingly have no plan. It's like they like to rob. I'm going to say this. When they're in the house, they have no plan. They're not stealing. They're in the house for hours.

And Joey Coco Diaz steals two sandwiches. Two bites of two sandwiches. Not even full sandwiches. They seem like they're aspirational criminals. Because at one point they go, we've been casing this house for days. But why? Because when you look in that house, there's nothing of value in there. It is a shithole. It's an asshole.

The worst Airbnb rental you could possibly get. I feel like the movie was decorated from a yard sale or a flea market.

Everything in there was disgusting. It was disgusting. There's two, there's mice. It's disgusting. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. There are white mice. There are laboratory mice living in the house. It's crazy. White mice I don't think exist out in the wild like that. I've never seen them. I hope I never do. Dude, there's a white mouse. I hope I never do. Two of them. Cut that out, though.

Cut it out. That's a cut point. Cut that out. I don't want people knowing what I said about white mice.

First of all, Mindy Sterling's in this movie, and I love her so much. She is, you know, she's so incredible. And I saw her in this movie, and then I saw her in the blooper reels, and she seemed like she was having a good time. But I was so distressed to see her. If that check cashes, you're having a great time. I was so distressed to see her. But when we go to Grandma's house, Mindy Sterling, and we're going to talk about, like, the age ranges of, like, the age. I looked it up. Everyone's 37. Right.

From the youngest kid to the oldest adult, they're all 37. What I will say about this performance, first of all, never have a brother and sister together that are that far apart in age and are seemingly always together, engaging, and interested in the same stuff. But they also have that kind of...

weird childhood thing. I wrote this down, and this is something I wrote down, like, Paul, don't say this, it's not going to get a laugh, but I'm going to say it. And this is like, he says to his parents when they're driving, when are we going to get there? Which is an odd thing to say. It's like, are we there yet? How long till we get there? But when are we going to get there? It's like, it's just like weird translations. It's like, that's the right

right question for a kid, but I've never heard anyone, what are we going to get there? Then I believe it if you said, oh, the screen play was written in a different language and then Google translated to English. Actually, it would make a lot more sense. The movie would make more sense if in any way, shape, or form, it was built off of AI, generated from a different language, from another world, part of a...

Part of a part of a sentence that these people are forced to carry out This is like that movie specialist under duress I think the reason why this movie gets started on the wrong foot and the reason why we have a hard time connecting is because we start off with the dog in voiceover and Mario Lopez is the dog and

And Mario Lopez is all the dogs. What? Did not realize that. What do you mean? Well, I don't know. I didn't look it up. But I think I'm almost positive. What does that mean? I think he's doing the voice of all of those dogs. Wait a second. Can you play clip five? Hey, boys. What's happening? Look at what we got here, fellas. A newbie. That's Mario Lopez. Like the Greek god. Wow. Fancy name for a street dog. Yeah, fancy name.

That's not Mario Lopez. Yes it is. It's Mario Lopez. Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is not- Mario Lopez is

It's not Mario Lopez, June. We can cut it. We're now just watching the movie together.

And I'll be honest, I mean, mere hours ago I was watching this, none of this familiar. Zero. It's already gone. I was surprised at how much I forgot. But here's what I'll say. My point, again, is that our lead-in, and if he played All the Dogs or not, which I don't think he did. Well, let's check. Okay. Our lead-in. I feel like one of these nerds would know. Is Mario Lopez the voice of All the Dogs? Yes.

Thank you, nerds. There's a couple people who said yes, and I appreciate you, but you're wrong, and I like that you support June so wholeheartedly. But here's the challenge. If June, you are in fact wrong, Mario Lopez, do the right thing and send us a clip of all the voices done by you. Give us the Snyder Cut of the dog who saved Christmas. When I watched this, I was like, oh, that's fun. They had him in the booth for

For Zeus, obviously. And then they let him just fuck around a little bit. Let me just say one thing I just want to say about him and his voice. Again, I think the reason why we don't connect is because when you open this movie, Mario Lopez is screaming voiceover. And it was shocking that he was a dog. He's like...

going on anyway christmas is the best time of year it's like oh okay and then it was a dog i was like a dog it it unnerved me because first of all i think first i've never heard anyone yell voiceover voiceover normally is more contemplative it's quiet it's not like it's not like proscenium acting and and i strongly disagree but okay but i felt like that

beginning put me on the wrong foot. I didn't like this dog. It also sets up a much different movie. Yes. It sets up a much different movie. The bombast of this character, it also felt to me jarringly like a movie I barely remember, but which is Eric Roberts voicing a cat that we did. A talking cat. It gave me those vibes too. I have no memory of that. But here's the thing. So Mario Lopez, he's Zeus, and he's just wandering around the streets, and he's like, well, I guess I'll turn myself in.

So, like, he turns himself into the Pound in hopes that a family will find him and rescue him. Meanwhile, what's really fascinating to me is that the guy who runs the Pound or the animal shelter or whatever is able to know all of the dogs' actual names. Zeus, the Bronx...

and they identify as Zeus and the Bronx. So does he understand dog? Not only does he know their names, he knows their backstories. Does he speak dog at one point? He does. Who speaks dog? Somebody speaks... I believe that that guy

and this is my fan fiction. This is your headcanon? This is my, like, is that in another Lifetime movie, he is a dog who becomes a dog catcher. Ooh. And so we're watching like a little MCU of like, oh, if you know the backstory, he's actually a dog because no human would be as weird as...

as he is. He is like, and this is an old reference. I love this pitch. Oh, I mean, I'm ready to see the backstory. He was a dog and he's the dog who became the dog catcher and now he's like trying to get all the dogs that are in dog prison to find good homes. And to a certain point, he's a terrible dog catcher. He's like, would you take two for one? Like they're cans of soup.

And of course not. Would you take two for one? And then in the outtakes, he said, would you take a half a dog with two legs? I thought he was funny. I mean, look, I will say the majority of this movie seemed largely poorly improvised. Yes.

In a way that, and it seemed to get more so as it went on, so much so that I was like, at the end of the movie, I was like, I feel like they're just loose improvising half takes and they're printing that and that's it. Like that line where Joey Cocodias says, you got that, he said, no, I don't need a nose job, which seemed like an improvised moment. Big time. Right, because Gene Cain, attractive man, on the outside, on the inside, not so much. But...

He says, you need a nose job. That's a joke, right? Okay, get these. No, no, I don't need a nose job. I have a deviated septum. And then he says, in your living room or something about your house? And then Dean Cain says, yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Yep, I wrote that one too. The other one that I wrote was... Improv is about saying yes. We've all learned that. The other one I wrote was at the end of the movie they come into the house, the robbers have been caught and everything and I can't remember what the main woman's name is but she comes in and says, oh George... What is it? Belinda. Belinda, thank you. Belinda comes in and says, oh George, look at this mess. And he says, well you know, we got robbed so this is what it's going to look like.

These are the lines? And then I'm going to go back to the beginning and we can unpack this moment as much as we want. But when Goldman's Chinese food comes in. Wow. This was some wild stuff. This was tough. The Jewish delivery man. This is a commentary on... There's so much to unpack. What's it a commentary on? I don't know.

actually i would love to try and figure out okay what is this commentary okay first of all i think that this movie is this movie does not like anyone or understand anyone who doesn't celebrate christmas because at the minute was like why does that woman not have christmas lights up and the only reason is that she's a scrooge also not that she doesn't celebrate christmas that's not even in the equation it's like she must take christmas

And also, every single person in the movie, including the robbers, believes in Santa. Full stop. Adults alone with each other speak with absolute certainty as to the existence and scheduling of Santa's arrival. At which point I was like, no. No.

No, this isn't a world that exists. I didn't have a problem with that part. I think that is done because they know that kids are going to sneak in to watch these, like, you know, these hallmark movies. But Dean Cain and Joey Diaz being like, well, what if Santa comes? Well, he doesn't come until later. I was like, hang on. Guys, I have an update. This guy's not coming at all. These poor robbers think Santa is real. When...

I will say this, that opening, we're talking about the poor improv in the film. And improv is hard, you know, whatever. No, it's not. Chicago, where improv started. The Annoyance, Second City, ImprovOlympic. That's right. Yes. Dale Close. Sharna did it here. Sharna Helper.

So when Goldman's Chinese... TJ and Dave! Jack McBrayer. Boo! When that man comes in, and I don't even want to deal with that just yet, but when that man comes in and goes, you know, nice woman, and, you know, it's like, oh, yeah, I'm talking about your wife, the immediate response from Bobo Kevin James is...

She's kosher, which was another disturbing. What does that mean? I didn't understand any of it and I hated every bit of it. And was he offering her to him? She's kosher. She's kosher. Yeah. Because it did feel like he was branding her like meat, not like... Not dairy? Oh, sorry, yes. Or I guess it's not a mix of the two?

I just felt like he wasn't saying it's kosher, like when you say it's all okay. I felt like he was like, no, no, you can eat her. That's what I took it as. It wasn't like she's cool. It was like, you can eat her as a Jewish man. Yeah. It would have been worse if he was like, don't even go there, bro. She's trafe. Okay. Okay. Okay, Jews of Chicago.

Okay, and this is my other issue with this movie. Ultimately, it's a Christmas movie, clearly shot in California. They are forcing these people into hats and jackets and on the sunniest of all days. And the most, like, it is beautiful. Foliage is out, you know, and this means nothing to most people, but this was shot in Los Angeles, and the opening sequence was shot in a mall that is very known in L.A. It's called The Grove.

But it's also really badly shot. Like, it felt like they're like, oh, shit.

Send that intern out with his iPhone and just grab a bunch of shots from the mall. We'll use it in something. It's too dark. And then when they shot stuff, like there's just like an empty chair and like two dudes standing around a chair and there's like a candy cane near them. It's like, this doesn't really connote Christmas to me. It just feels like you shot in an abandoned shopping mall. That's what's so upsetting about this movie in general. Like two things that I love, dogs and Christmas, I now hate.

Like, I don't, I hated all of the Christmas lights, the Christmas ornaments, things that bring me so much comfort and joy. I turned against. The spirit of Christmas was not present in this movie. And by the way, for a movie where adults believe in Santa and everybody believes in Santa, where the fuck was Santa? Yeah.

Where was Santa? You don't need Santa when the dog Zeus is there saving Christmas. But there were footsteps at one point on the roof. There were. Was that Zeus? I believe so.

How did Zeus get on the roof? I don't know. I think that's when he was putting the bowling balls in action. I don't know. By the way... Zeus is up to some straight craziness in this movie. I don't mean to be a dog pervert. Okay. Please don't be, Paul. But... Is it something only a dog pervert says? I will say...

I will say the most chemistry in the movie is not quite Kevin James and the dog having a bath together. Oh, wait. Like, that is the most compelling romantic narrative in the movie. And the presumption is the married couple fuck. There's so much. I just want to just, but I want to get everyone's opinion here. I don't mean to be a dog pervert. Like, I said that, so we're cool. Zeus is a lady.

And almost aggressively so. Like, even just an eye check. I don't need to check underneath. I'm like, I got it. Put your fingers down, first of all. Yeah. What? Like that? Put your fingers down. You know what? I believed you when you said I don't mean to be a dog pervert until every physical motion. These are the physical motions of a dog pervert.

That's the t-shirt. It's Paul Scheer doing this. And it says, I'm not a dog pervert. Chicago, how did this get made? 2023. That's the shirt. But I don't like that at all. I didn't care for that one bit, Paul. This is definitely trying to get the dog's G-spot. I don't know what you're up to, but that's what that is. This dog's going to squirt.

Hear me out, Chicago. That's the shirt. Hear me out, Chicago. This dog's going to squirt. Chicago. All right. You brought up the bath scene, which I think is one of the most disturbing sequences in this film. In cinema history? In cinema history? Let's take a look at scene six. I don't want this. Watch it, you creeps.

We're going to take it one step at a time. This is a little awkward, George, don't you think? The dog does not want to be there. The dog is looking away. The most damning moment comes in just a second when the dog puts its head down. Here it goes.

He's trying to hold his arm up so he can get the dog's head in frame. Dog does not want to be in that tub. Dog is like, I'm going to drown myself. The dog is trying to drown itself. Okay. He's talked in this scene to the dog more than he's talked to his wife in the entire movie.

Has anyone ever taken all their clothes off and gotten in a bath with their dog? No, I'm not going to lie. When I saw that, I was like, hmm. I was like, oh, I've never... What though? What does that mean? I was like, that would be a nice experience to have with a dog. Oh, okay. But...

So you're saying that seems attractive, not like, that looks good. Not at all. Okay. Just like, oh, if I had to give a dog a bath, I'd only give dogs baths outside in our driveway. But that seems... Which you do every Saturday. You just give dogs baths every Saturday. Any dog that's walking by, I offer a bath. Hey, hey, can I give that dog a bath? Free dog baths. But I will say this. Not as a dog pervert, but you have too much...

valuable bits there that I feel like a paw can stomp on. I need some more protection. I mean, look, I don't expect the dog not to understand that. I just feel like, why are you subjecting your own body to scratches? Everything. You're too vulnerable. I understand.

Like, I mean, to put them in a little tub, we had a little tub in our driveway. Do it up, you can wash them down. You don't need to be in, that is a choice of desire. Yes. Not necessity. Yes. That isn't, it would make sense to be there so that I can wash the dog, okay? No. That is, I want to be in tub with dog. I know. I know.

I am, me too with dog. We are both tub now. Yay. I'm talking to the dog. And I will say, there's something about Zeus where I didn't connect with Zeus on screen. I didn't feel. The dog itself. The dog itself. I didn't feel what Zeus was feeling. And except for this scene where I was like, get Zeus out. Zeus out.

doesn't want to be there. Zeus is not looking Bobo, Kevin James in the eye. Zeus is looking away. Zeus is trying to kindly relay that she wants to go now. This guy is forcing himself on a lot of people. I felt like he was trying to lip kiss this wife multiple times and she's like, cheek. I did too. Cheek.

Cheek. Cheek, please. He's also, I think, either it's improvising or maybe it is part of the script, but he's improvising and trying to put onto the dog the traumas of his character's youth. Which, by the way, though, Jason, what happened to him in that dog? Who knows? Who knows?

Did the dog, did Duke? He had to put his dog down. But why? Because when we see that scene where he says he's playing with Duke or whatever that dog's name is and in the flashback and then his mom calls him in for dinner and says stop playing with Duke. I'm like, well, what?

Did Duke run out and get hit by a car? What happened? Well, I mean, the back story. Oh, go ahead. The Zeus is like, he says, he's the spitting image of my dog. And in this scene, we weren't listening to it, but he's having some sort of like heart to heart with like his own person. Both of them are traumatized. And we are to believe through the events of this movie healed.

They are healed and become whole? Their backstories are fuzzy. Their backstories are fuzzy. It's like, this dog doesn't bark because he blew a six-year or six-month- Five-year undercover operation and his partner's trigger finger was injured and he can't shoot straight anymore. Now, why do I know that?

Why do I know that? Why do I care? I had so many feelings about that. I'm like, the fact that they didn't kill a cop was... It felt, like, very strategic and pointed. Like, why was that backstory so...

I also don't understand how a dog could blow a five-year. By barking. But by barking, but like the dog isn't wearing. Okay, but. Listen, internal affairs is investigating the dog. IA is on it.

And first of all, I thought German Shepherds were police dogs. Yes. Okay, so I'm not... Not a golden retriever. A golden retriever is a police dog. This dog is straight up dumb and is absolutely not a police dog. I don't think golden retrievers are appropriate for this task. But yeah, the dog barked.

But what was going on? But what was going on? Like, was the five-year undercover operation simply that they were behind a wall the entire time? With a live dog and the dog by barking? You've got to read the expose in K9 Quarterly. They blew this whole thing wide open. What I wanted to see was one of those cops get killed and our dog...

have to like lap up the blood absolutely a badge absolutely and really understand why this is so traumatizing everybody should get killed except the dog and the dog honestly Zeus should have been shot too yes

I'm sorry for that to work. In the throat. But in a movie, think about how good the movie would have been if it started with that shootout and Zeus barks. All the cops are dying. And as they're dying, they're saying, but will Santa know where I am this year? Because I believe in Santa, even though I'm a police officer dying in the line of duty.

I still believe in Santa. And he goes, ho, ho, ho. You get coal for Christmas. The set Joey Cocotillo says, I don't want coal in my stocking again this year. Again? That means he got it last year from Santa?

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I also had an issue with the dog's behavior because Zeus shows us no bad behavior. He seems like a perfect dog. This mom does not really want around. Then he makes one fatal mistake, which I would argue was a blessing, destroying that disgusting gingerbread house.

That was terrible. Normally when I see a movie, I'm like, oh my god, how did they make that gingerbread house? I could never do that. Here, I'm like, I could do a better job. It was structurally unsound to begin with. You don't put a giant Hershey kiss on such a narrow footing. It was doomed to break.

And yes, the dog may have just gotten that, but for him to be given away because he just moved in the house, and then that seems like it set off a chain of events where he just became a bad dog. I have a question for you because the whole family seems to genuinely fall immediately in love with the dog. Except the mom. Begrudgingly. The mom begrudgingly. And she's, you know, she still, I think, has a real love for the dog, but it needs to bark, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, so they,

- I would hire a man to, in the middle of the day, break into the house using what I can only describe as Looney Tunes techniques.

Using the old stake over there. And he's like, well, she failed the test. Who is this? What is this service? I thought that that was the burglar doing a first attempt. I thought so too. And it's not, is this a service that someone provides? Let me just tell you that Paul had sort of checked out at that point in the movie.

And he was just on his phone responding to emails and stuff. And that scene happened. And then Paul just wasn't watching. And he was like, who was that? And I was watching and I said, I don't know. Who was it? Who was it? Who did they hire? To June's point, she's right. I was confused. But this is a weird movie where nothing is happening. But if you turn away for a second, so much goes on.

And it's a weird thing. I'm like, how did so much happen? Because so much is just dropped in. You're like, wait, wait, why do they not want it? How did they get this house? What's going on? Like, they want the dog out by Christmas Eve? Bring it back by Christmas Eve? Decisions are made quick. Right?

They also decide we're getting rid of the dog. And then they're like, we got to go to grandma's. Leave the dog here. We'll go to grandma's. Then the dog is home alone so they can have a home alone plot. But then they come home and the dog's captured the things. But when were they getting rid of the dog? Why even say you're getting rid of the dog? None of that even seems to matter whatsoever. There are also, we haven't discussed at all,

There are so many point of view shots from the dog and also from the inside of the toilet, from inside the fridge. The toilet POV. But the dog POV shots are themselves so crazy because they're all just everybody reacting just to the camera. Like...

And touching around the camera's lens, but not quite the camera, as if... Like, I think the dog and the humans only worked for four hours one day. Yes. Everything else is human shot, dog shot. Human shot, dog shot. They had to do something weird, and to me, you understand how hard it is to work with a dog when you see what they have to do later in the movie, which is, it's Christmas Eve, the family has gathered...

Okay, I want to just go through this slowly. At the grandma's house, and he is reading Canine Quarterly or Canine Monthly. Which he has brought from home. Right. Right.

A magazine that is established in the other house. Okay. So he's brought that home. But it's also like, when did he order it? Because it seems like the movie takes place over the course of two days. I also want to say, and this is really weird, the magazine seems real because the back page has an advertisement for like wall clippers. Yes. And I was like, is it possible this is a real magazine? Oh, I'm sure. And I had a crisis of faith. Well...

I was dealing with that. But everything left my mind when I saw the TV show that the two kids were watching. Those two kids on Christmas Eve are watching a black and white TV show called Chappie, which is like a Lassie ripoff. And it just is so... I was like...

And everyone knows, like, oh, Chappie's on. And they're watching it. Wait, you didn't spend every Christmas Eve watching Chappie? Are you saying Chappie? Chappie. Chappie. And not the Neil Blomkamp movie Chappie. I know. Well, that's what I thought. But no, it is a black and white dog show called Chappie. And I felt like they were like, we can't shoot any fucking more dogs. Like, look, can you find some black and white footage? It's got to be a free.

like a royalty free public domain. It's why they, at the end of the movie, what do they sing? What Christmas carol do they sing? That they sing no, nothing but the chorus. We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. And none of the rest. We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Again, we wish you a Merry Christmas. I was like, wait. Honestly, the family singing that to the townspeople,

And them singing it back and then the family singing it back to them truly was one of the most frightening things I've ever seen. I was like, this is terrifying to watch. It feels like a prompt that is meant to further put you into a hypnotic state. It was psychotic. Because you have been captured by Russia.

You know what? There's so much here to unpack, but I think it's unfair that we don't let you. We can't go to the audience. Really? Already? Already? I mean, I have like 700,000 more notes, but absolutely we can go to the audience. I think we should go and just start. Suffice it to say, you don't have to ask your question about the clapper. We know they made clapper jokes in this movie. It's 2009, and they lead with a clapper joke. 2009. The clapper here, what I was impressed with, it was hooked up to Christmas lights.

The dirtiest, most disgusting headboard. Again, it reminded me of every terrible Airbnb I've ever been in. I'll never forget the stains on that headboard as long as I live. They shot this in an abandoned hoarder's house. So upset. And also, after seeing the grandma's house, which looked nice, why didn't they shoot the whole movie there? Only could have one day. That's interesting.

That house that they lived in was so big. Shithole. What was... How about this? What was the bridge over the moat in the front yard? So many questions about that. Why did this house have a moat? Show it to us too, you cowards. Answer me, Chicago. Show it. Show it. Answer me, Chicago. Why did this house have a moat? I'll show you something that I found in the house. Can you pull up the picture of the bookcase? Bookcase one. Okay. Okay.

So I was wondering, how did this guy have this money for this house? And I started to think about it, right? So there is a scene where the dog is looking at the owner. Bookcase one. We're going to pop up the picture of bookcase one. I'm just now seeing Dean Cain and Joey Diaz. So look, that's bookcase one, right? And I did a little zooming in. Go into bookcase two. Thoracic surgery. By the way, it brings up such a good point, Paul.

What is Bobo Kevin James' job? The only answer, the only answer I think is that the son is a thoracic surgeon.

Because absolutely neither of those adults are thoracic surgeons. The kids are Doogie Howser. I don't know. But isn't it interesting that the son is a thoracic surgeon, but the dog doesn't have a voice? Wow. Wow, wow, wow. That's really interesting. All right. Who raised their hand? I forgot. We got so lost. Okay. Hi. Your name and your question. Dave. I'll hold the mic. Do not be grabby, Dave. I just want to talk about my favorite character, the cat lady.

Adrian. I'm so glad you brought her up, Dave. Thank you. Thank you, Dave. The craziest thing about the cat lady, in my opinion, is the fact that not only did she know the grandma at the very end of the movie, I think they had a little thing going. Oh, I like this. I'm sorry. I like this. Thousand percent. Do you mean the connection they made at the town's karaoke night where they duetted on Hava Nagila? I'm sorry. What? What?

This movie... That's not a song that's available in a karaoke list. That's not your karaoke? I mean, come on. How many people here, their karaoke song is Hava Nagila? All right. That was Usher. Now we got... Okay, we got Hava Nagila. Paula and I, we watched the Cat Lady monologue, and we were... It was the only point in the movie. There were two points in the movie where I really...

I connected. I dropped in. One was when one of our robbers, not Dean Cain, what's that actor's name again? Joey Diaz. Thank you. Joey Diaz. Coco Diaz. Yes.

When he said, when he started talking about basement fridges and what was in the basement fridge as opposed to a kitchen fridge, I was like, that's really funny and interesting. And then the other moment was Cat Lady's monologue. Yeah. And it was beautifully delivered. It was heartbreaking. It was heartbreaking. The only reason her house isn't decorated is because she got too old to be able to do it herself. Okay, but here's my question though, Jason. That was devastating. But I did question it at the same time. Do you think she's lying? Well...

While she's delivering, and again, she does it beautifully, and I loved everything about it, but while she's delivering that monologue, we can see behind her, every inch of that wall is decorated. Oh, I think she means the exterior. She did mean the exterior, but I just felt like she could have done it. I'll say it. Wow. I felt like she could have done it. Wow.

So your note is, Adrienne Barbeau, do the work. Honestly, like, I don't want you to have this experience of being perceived as, like, a Christmas grinch, but put some lights on your outside. Like, put a couple things out there. Maybe sometimes it's not the actual note, but it's the note under the note. And, you know, and I feel like that was what it was for her. You know, just don't, yeah, that's a good one. Thank you, June, for bringing that up. Do better.

Old lady whose husband died. All right, let's get back to the audience here. Who had their name? Okay, you're great. What's your name and your question? Sean, cut this, please. So it seems like the option between their security is a dog or an alarm system. Either or. Why can't there be both?

Well, it's a great question. I mean, Paul, I'll never forget, we did experience a series of break-ins and we did speak to someone in law enforcement. No, we didn't get a series of break-ins. There was a series of break-ins. Well, no, our car was stolen from our driveway. Well, our car was stolen from our driveway because we left the keys inside the car. But that's not why. It just happened to happen that way, but that's not why. And I say we in the most general way. Your car was donated from your driveway. Yeah.

Just because I let... When you watch the security footage of this guy getting in our car and seeing the keys, he's like...

It was like watching someone win the lotto. I was happy for him. Just because I left the keys in the car did not mean I was asking for it to be stolen. The guy on camera is like, wait a minute. It's too good to be true. His face lit up like a Christmas tree. And I will say it was the night after we got our Christmas tree. So there was a little bit of holiday spirit. There was a lot happening while I was walking inside. And yes, I left the keys in the car.

Here's the thing that... We were told by the police officer at that time, don't worry about alarms. The biggest deterrent is a dog. Yeah, I think that's true. But I think for this family, they're missing out on, sir, a third option, which is drawbridge. They've got a permanent... They've got a moat already there. They've got a permanent bridge. Huge mistake. Pull it up! Put in a drawbridge. Nobody's getting in...

It worked. Unless you have like a Trojan dog. Trojan dog! All right, your name, your question. My name is KR, and my question is, after they adopted Zeus, how did they get his canine plaques? Good question. I mean, all of it. How do they know his name is Zeus? Does Zeus have his own stuff with him wherever he goes? This makes no sense. Zeus isn't...

I am up in the balcony. Oh, God, be careful, Paul. Once again with our balcony monsters. And I will ask this. I said. Chicago balcony lawless. I said to the audience at the top of the show, I said, is anyone here in costume? Okay, I'm going to you first. A reward costume. Chicago balcony monsters, a.k.a. the untouchables. You're in costume. You are. Okay, I love it.

What is this costume? I'm one of the robbers as their utility plumber outfits. Fantastic. Great work. Fantastic. Amazing. Okay. What's your name? Sierra. Sierra. And what is your question? So I wanted to look up to see, because the music was so Home Alone-esque, to see who the composer is. And that led me down to a rabbit hole.

On Wikipedia, the music composer Andres Bolton has like a mixed filmography of being with dog Christmas movies and serial killer murder movies. Then I decided, who else is there? So the director, Michael Pfeiffer, I think, has a bunch of serial killer movies like Ed Gein, the BTK killer, the Boston Strangler.

Wow. And more dog Christmas movies mixed in. So basically he summers with a Christmas and he winters with a serial killer. It continues. This cinematographer also has this setup of a mix of dog Christmas movies and murder serial killer movies and also early in his career porn films. Which is kind of a mix of both, really, you know.

It's a classic one for me, one for them scenario. And then both of them for me. Yeah. And then them on me and me on them.

They apparently did a bunch of the same movies together, but the overall question that I have is, because of their filmography, is doing the Christmas dog movies as a way of trying to have an enlightened, a relief from all of the dark tension that they have with the serious movies? Or is it just another way of them to stall time and get a paycheck until they go back to their real passion of murderers?

Wow. This is a great question. Great, great, great, great. Sierra...

I mean, it seems like these guys, it's probably a group of folks who all work together and they just plug now in either dog Christmas movies or murder movies. But I do believe that if you work this circuit, like this Lifetime Hallmark Channel circuit, it's like we got to do one holiday and one killer. And it's like we will cover it. We will get it. You basically just described the Lifetime Network.

June and I were watching, I think it was Killer Week. We were on tour. We were watching it every night. We came home and we'd watch...

Back-to-back serial killer movies, it was like the homecoming killer. Then it was like my principal killed the homecoming queen. And then afterwards it was like my best friend was the killing homecoming queen. It was like they all were tied loosely. But it was like, yeah, they have so many of them. Oh, that is an industry that is almost bottomless. There was a period during the pandemic where I was recording two...

Two Magnum PIs and one Columbo a day. That's right, on my DVR. Good old TiVo. It's cool, I'm 50. First of all, I just want to give a shout out to TiVo's, the original DVR. The best. It's always important to put some respect on their name. I had a TiVo that I sent away.

So they could put an extra hard drive in it. I did the same thing. I did the same thing. And I will tell you, Paul, I remember when Paul and I first started dating, I remember your apartment in New York, going there and seeing that you had TiVo and being like, wow. Like, wow. All right. Oh, wow.

I could have every episode of Buffy that I wanted at a moment's notice. I mean, what a luxury. What a luxury to be like, you know, I've got 20 gigs of Preston Sturgis movies on here. Okay. I am admiring this gentleman's small notebook. It's a very tiny, it's a very tiny notebook. Oh my gosh. It's so tiny notebook with a lot of notes. Tiny notebook. All right. So, uh,

I'm predicting this to be good, but I don't want to put pressure on you. Your name and your question. My name is Jamie. My question is when we finally learn why the dog can't bark, it's told in a flashback. And then the evil cat lady responds to that flashback. So my question is, can the cat lady understand the dog? Yes, they are having a conversation that is...

that presumes she knows what the dog is saying. I wrote that down too, Jamie. I fully agree with you. And it is shocking that someone that far back in the balcony had a cogent thought. So I really want to give it up for Jamie. Everyone around him is passed out. You know what? I can't beat that. I feel like we're just going downhill from here. All right. Obviously...

People out there have questions. They have feelings. But you know what? Some people out there think this movie might be their favorite Christmas film. And we're going to hear from them right now because now it's time for Second Opinions. I'm Casey. This Christmas I give it five stars. Ex-cop dogs save the day. Cause crime doesn't pay.

tears when Zeus barked out his fears. I give you my second opinion. Whoa! Great job. What a way to start. So, a little anticlimactic with the second opinions because there are only 360 total reviews. But 75% are five star. Now, before I even read these,

I will let you know, there are multiple films in this franchise. Five. Five films. The Dog Who Saved, and we're going to talk about that in a second, but some of these reference those. Dubitone, in 2019, wrote this. My daughter, three, was obsessed with the dog that saved Halloween. We watched that nightmare of a movie...

Hundreds of times. Well, I mean, it is Halloween, so spooky, kind of a nightmare. So you can imagine her excitement and my horror when she discovered that there were multiple movies, including this little gem. Bad acting, bad plot, bad everything. Dot, dot, dot. And your kids will absolutely love it. The title, A New Definition of Hate.

The rating: 5 stars. Amazon customer in 2013 writes this: "Title of the review: Love dogs. Cute to watch, but not into the talking animals. 5 stars." Wow. Now, when we are at the bottom of the barrel of 5 star reviews, we go to 1 star reviews. These are first opinions. People who share the same opinion as some of us.

Clifford Dawson writes... Wait, no, is this Clifford the Big Red Dog? Because that is a bias. He was considered for the role and was passed on. Now, this one, the reason why I read this is because I don't think you'll know where it's going. Title is, This May Be the Worst Christmas Movie Ever. He wrote this the year after it came out in 2010.

Writing, terrible. Acting, even worse. Production values, cheap and cheesy. Animal voiceovers, sub-idiotic. This is what I get for letting the wife pick the film for the night. But she didn't even like it! The only question I had after the pain was over, aside from wanting the 90 minutes back, was...

How did such a deadhead family afford that house? The father didn't act like he could possibly do anything that would put him in that income bracket. Perhaps he earned it the old-fashioned way. He inherited it. Yet another argument for a family planning one star. Holy shit! Holy shit! That's... I mean, I agree with that review.

Shockingly? Wow. Oh, boy. Can you imagine just being fucking absolutely livid and jealous at the family in this movie? That you get on. And it's also like, yeah, it's a lot of house, but every square foot is a shithole. I mean, please host a HGTV house show. Please. It's a shithole. Please. It's a...

Oh my god. Oh my god. Are you watching It's a Shithole with June Diane Rayfield? I love that show. I love at the beginning of every episode where she walks through and tells everybody what a shithole they live in. And then at the end, it's so sweet. I cry every time because it's not a shithole anymore.

I'm going to just... The gate at the front? Holy shit. The fence, the gate, the moat, the bridge, every element of the house genuinely felt like it had been dropped from another planet. Yes.

Remember when they're driving in the car? I'm sorry. Remember when they're driving in the car and the stone cold genius, Mindy Sterling, who we've mentioned before, Groundlings, incredible comedian, she's singing, she's annoying everybody in the car and they're driving full speed and the son tries to throw himself from the car and

Do you remember that part of the movie? I do remember that part. That's how I felt watching the whole movie. We keep on talking throughout the movie when they keep on referencing the grandma and how she has stale pretzels and like flat soda. We get to her house and I'm like, she seems like she's fun. Oh, she's cool as hell. She's the only person in this movie I believe fucks. I also believe...

They don't get her because they're not cool. I know. I'm like, this lady is awesome. Her and Adrienne Barbeau are the most interesting characters in this movie. And I wish the family and the dog had all died in a carbon monoxide leak. And by the way, just, you know, I know we're wrapping things up. I know you got your nose ball. But I just have to say one more thing.

I have to say one more thing because the decision on Christmas Eve, they established that grandma's house is hours away. Hours. Not one hour and probably not two, but probably two and a half to three hours away. And they decide on Christmas Eve to go back and get Zeus.

And from what I before they found out that like their house had been robbed, it seemed like they were going to drive. They had already driven there. That's three hours. They were going to drive back. That's another three hours. And then they were going to drive to grandma's house to just be with the dog. Yes. That's nine hours of driving. And honestly, nobody likes the dog that much.

And no one likes the grandma even more. I was absolutely confounded. They get there. Zeus has captured the criminals and the police try and recruit Zeus. Zeus.

Because Zeus has done a better job than that town's police department. And that was another moment where Paul and I were watching together. Sometimes we rely on each other to keep track of the plot. And I had zoned out for a second. I was just looking out the window or something. And I said, wait, wait, wait, what just happened? And Paul said, the police are trying to... He goes... He goes...

the police are trying to adopt Zeus. And I was like, oh, okay. Of course. But wouldn't it have been so much better if the police were like, Zeus? Right. Because he's a famous canine dog. But not in that. What if they were like, Zeus, oh my God, where have you been?

And then they reveal this backstory that they didn't know, but yet they all know the backstory because the man who used to be a dog is now the owner of the pound. Do you even believe that in this town, whatever town these people are in, that there is the need to... Okay, here's what it is. Here's what it is, and this is unexamined fully. Do dogs go undercover?

I know police officers do, but are dogs part of it? Do dogs have a cover identity? Sometimes you'll see a dog with a baseball cap on. You're like, cop. I see a dog with his head out of a Crown Vic. I'm like, cop. All right. Let me drop some stuff on you. Stuff. Not knowledge, but just stuff. Stuff.

This movie premiered on ABC Family on November 29th, 2009 during their countdown to 25 Days of Christmas programming block. It was ranked as the number one cable program in its time slot and the number one cable film in the winter of 2009 with four million viewers.

It was the cable's number one program during its period of 8 to 10 p.m. with 4 million viewers. It ranked number one in scripted telecasts on cable during that Sunday. It became the season's number one cable film. Stop, stop. What are you saying? It had a 14% increase in viewers from the same time slot in the previous year. I can't imagine that that is real. Stop.

That's 4 million viewers for context. Like, every episode of Mad Men got like 1.2 million viewers. Every episode of 30 Rock got like sub 1 million viewers. You're saying this had 4 million views? The dog who saved Christmas won several Yulees. What? Ghoulies? Yulees. Yule, like Yule log, Yulees. A loggy? Yeah.

From the Entertainment Weekly's website, the categories it won included MVP, Most Valuable Pooch, and Best Use of Dean Cain. Whoa. You know what? I don't disagree with that one, actually. Is that a category every year? In the Uleys. Every award show. Whoa. Best Use of Dean Cain. It also was given... What are you talking about? Absolutely... Okay, hang on a second.

If we, for real talk, if we had Dean Cain on the podcast, would we be eligible for a Yulee? If we televised the show. We'd have to televise the show? It's almost worth it. I would love it if we won a Yulee, I would retire. And don't nominate us for a Yulee just to get me to retire. I want to know...

Open you up to one more thing five sequels. Let me tell you what it is. So this was the first first the dog Yeah, who saved Christmas sequel the dog who saved Christmas vacation aired a year later Then another sequel the dog who saved Halloween September 2011

Third sequel, The Dog Who Saved the Holidays, 2012. Wait a minute. A fourth sequel, The Dog Who Saved Easter. Fifth sequel, The Dog Who Saved Summer, 2015. Summer? Yes. Now, I'm going to drop this knowledge on you. Oh, God. Gary Valentine was in every one except for Easter. Wait, who is Gary Valentine? I don't know.

Kevin James' brother. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know. I was like, well, who's that? Dean Cain. I wouldn't believe it if that was his. Maybe Zeus' name is Gary Valentine. If I'm thinking about it, the dog is probably the most consistent performer. I would love it if the dog's name was Gary Valentine. Gary Valentine on set. Gary Valentine. There are only... Okay. I'm trying to figure out how to present this to you.

One character, or I should say three characters that are in all the sequels. Do we get to guess? Yeah, sure. Zeus? Yes, but with a caveat. It's not always the same dog. No. Oh. Mario Lopez provides his voice for the first three films, drops out for two, then comes back for the final two. Wow, it's like Vin Diesel. He's the Vin Diesel of this franchise? Yes.

Where he's like, I'm too good for this. Wait a minute. It's a hit? I'm back, baby. But it's always Zeus, no matter the vote. Joey Lawrence replaces him in Halloween and Holidays. That is the third and fourth film. And then he comes back for Easter and Summer. Wow. Belinda Bannister. Okay, well, you guess. You guess. Who is in all the movies? My guess, Paul, is Belinda Bannister. Yes, yes.

something tells me it might be belinda banister paul that's my answer okay you would be correct but here's the other ones that are in all the movies dean cain by the way thank god joey coco diaz and one of the great mindy sterling they're in all gary valentine is not in all

Dean Cain, Joey Coco Diaz, Mindy Sterling, and Elisa Donovan, who plays Belinda Bannister, is in all the films. Now, the kids change like Griswolds. I can see that. Can I just show one more moment here? Scene seven, please. This is the most disturbing image I saw in the film. Belinda always said to brush after every male.

All right. Yes, he's brushing. Got it. That. Dog sauna. Dog is in the sauna. He put himself in the sauna. Did he turn the sauna on? He must have.

Come Zeus, drink from my well Oh, okay, actually I'm so glad we're showing this Because I understood, I guess, that the mice could talk That all the other animals had a voice But why did the toilet talk? That really turned in, that really fucked with me Because I, don't raise your hand like you know You know why the toilet talked Hold on Hold on

What's her name? And by the way, the way she's saying I know. I know, I know. Yeah, but it's also, there's a level of confidence that is unnerving. Go ahead, go ahead. Hi, what's her name? Rachel. Rachel, and why does the toilet talk? Okay, you're going to be embarrassed when you didn't think of this yourself. It's the dog voicing what he thinks the toilet is saying to him. Woo!

Okay. Wait, but is the dog guessing what the mice are saying to him? No, they're actual animals, so they can talk. Right, it's like the way that we would talk to ourselves. Rachel, absolutely not. What? I buy it, Rachel. You think that's the dog projecting a voice? I believe Rachel. This guy is saying something over here. What are you saying? Wait. Yes. Wait, the toilet is sentient because the toilet has a POV shot. Now, you are, yes. And you...

Wait, you say it's a bidet. She says it's not a toilet, it's a bidet. She's saying, this woman is saying, the toilet's a bidet! The toilet's a bidet! Okay, and this woman is saying, it's the furnace joke from Home Alone. Oh, okay, that makes sense. Well, there we go. I love that at the end of the show, everybody's coming undone, trying to figure out why the fucking toilet talks in this absolute dog shit movie.

We have suffered through this. Everybody's like, I'd love to make sense of the talking toilet. When in reality, this fever dream broke us all. And you're all going home to your kids, sending the sitter home, and are like, what the fuck just happened to us? Well, people, we did it. We did this show. Chicago, we will be back.

for Jason Manzoukas. Give it up for June Diane Raphael. I am Paul Scheer. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. We love being here. We hated this movie. Good night, everybody. Eat shit, Chicago.

Yes, the holiday season is here. As a matter of fact, I'm in a holiday movie right now. That's right. You can check me out in Family Switch on Netflix. It's a Jen Garner movie with Ed Helms. I'm in it. I play a dick. And you know what? It is really fun. Thank you to everyone in Chicago who made this such a great show. I mean, truly.

Truly, we love doing shows in Chicago. Unfortunately, you'll never be able to hear one of the shows that we did in Chicago because the person who was tasked with recording it really messed up. And here's the thing. Everyone makes mistakes, but that person was a real dick about it. So Riviera Theater, A+, that dude. All right. Well, look.

I know that you don't want to hear me complain about the guy who forgot to hit record on our first show in Chicago. Uh, but you probably like Paul, can I get a shirt that kind of embodies everything that we just talked about? Yeah, you can. We have an amazing shirt. It's, uh,

It's basically the lead actor of this movie in a bathtub with a dog who's looking down at his dick. And there's nothing on it. No quote, no anything. It just says, Chicago, how did this get made? Because I couldn't put dog pervert

I just couldn't. I felt like no one would buy it. Anyway, tpublic.com slash stores slash HDTGM. You get that as a sticker and a laptop case, a mug, whatever you want. It's a great looking image. It's more questions than answers. You've already probably heard me plug our How Did This Get Made? I'll

ugly holiday sweater collection. There's still time to order one before the holidays. If you get your order in before December 10th, you will get your delivery before Christmas. These are great. We gave them out at these shows and people went bonkers for them. The Geostorm one is aces. All designs are available at podswag.com slash bonkers. And you can also get some how to get made wrapping paper. That's right. All right, people.

Get ready, because next week is a special, supersized Last Looks. That's right, we're going to be going over corrections and omissions from both Munchies and The Dog Who Saved Christmas. So if you have anything you want us to know about either movie, leave us a voicemail at 619-P-A-U-L-A-S-K or write a comment on our Discord at discord.gg slash hdtgm. And of course, as always, Jason will stop by Last Looks for a chat and we will announce our next movie. Remember, you can find us

everywhere online. If you love the show, tell your friends. It really does help. I mean, that really is the best way to promote the podcast. Word of mouth. Plus, it's more fun when you can watch these movies with people you know. And last but not least, I got to say thank you to all the listeners who support this show every week and our entire behind-the-scenes team who keep this show running. I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sonney, Molly Reynolds,

Averill Halle, our engineers, Casey Holford and Rich Garcia, and our associate producer, Jess Cisneros, who makes those amazing social media videos. That's all I got, people. Bye for now. Averill Halle.

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