Was It a Love Connection For Kelly and Pascal??
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Hey everyone, it's Amy and TJ. I know that I certainly have had plenty of therapy over the years and it's helped me get to where I am today. Thousands have already trusted Rula to support them on their journey toward improved mental health and overall well-being. Head on over to rula.com slash idopod to get started today. After you sign up, they ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Go to

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California Psychics.

♪♪♪

Welcome back to I Do Part Two. I am one of your celebrity mentors, Jennifer Fessler. You know me from the podcast I co-host, Two Jersey Jays, with Jackie Goldschneider. And from The Real Housewives of New Jersey, I am so excited because tonight I am joined by fellow housewife, well, by housewife, I'm not a housewife, anyway, and celebrity mentor, Kelly Ben-Symoné. And...

And we are coming to you from live in the vineyard in Napa Valley, California. Hi, Kel. Hi. I think my voice just cracked a little. I know, because we've had a long day. It's been a day. Well, you and I both came from Newark. Right. No, I came from Kennedy. Oh, you did? Oh, I came from Newark. Because I flew Delta. Oh, my God. So we both came from New York today. Up at 445. Oh, my God. So it's a long day. It's a long day. But how unbelievably gorgeous is it here? Oh, my God. I

I've never been in better weather. Just the weather. It is so beautiful now, but it's gorgeous. Just don't take a taxi. I got off. I get out of the airport. I'm like, oh, I'm just going to take a taxi. I was like, a taxi? You didn't take an Uber? I was like, no, I live in New York. Like, we take taxis everywhere.

Literally $400 later. So don't do that. My Uber was not that much less, but also we lived in San Francisco. Jen, don't take the Uber. Listen, thank you, iHeart. Thank you. Okay, Kelly. So I, we are going to jump right in because I feel like the I Do listeners have been on this journey with you and having to do with your dating life. Yes. So let me just give you guys first a little bit of the backstory of

So, Kelly, you, when was it? Back a little ways. You played the dating game. Yes. Our friend Kelly here is single and ready to mingle. Yes. And you played the dating game on I Do Part Two. Yes. With three different men. Yes. And you chose one from the Golden Bachelor. Yes.

Correct. You chose, were they all three of them? Three of the guys on the dating game were from the golden bachelor. Okay. Okay. Um,

And I chose one of them. Okay. So you chose one of them. I chose him because he can make salmon at a certain temperature. Oh, right. Apparently you really like salmon or something. You got a thing for salmon. I love salmon. He can make the salmon. Or you love the salmon. But I also like men that cook. Okay. Kelly's standards are, yes. I can make food. I can make food. But I don't like to. There was something about the salmon that turned you on. Okay.

I love when a man makes me food. Okay. But it didn't work out. His proficiency in salmon cooking was not enough because- Well, it wasn't enough because then he started texting me these telenovelas about what he's doing, what kind of pocket square he's wearing. I'm like, have you met me before? Have you ever even- Right. Like, my name's Kelly. My name is Kelly. How are you? Nice to see you. Where are you from?

Right. Okay. He jumped in too quickly. He jumped in and was like, I'm going to be a superstar and this is what's happening. And then. I'm going to be a superstar. Like he was, he was going to be a, he was going to be on some television show. I was like, that's great. I thought you were a doctor. Right. That kind of turned me off. I'm not going to lie. Okay. And so then it was so wild because I'm like,

All of a sudden, like, he's texting me. And he's like, I can't go to, I can't come meet you at iHeart because I'm meeting this girl and this is her name. And I'm like, okay. And I said, did I miss something? That was my...

I didn't say anything. I literally just read it. And I said, did I miss something? And then he went into a whole other thing about why he couldn't go on the date with me or whatever, why we couldn't walk the carpet. Oh, my God. And so I got to walk the carpet with Gary. And that's where you and I became friends. Yes. But hold on a second. Hold on. So Gary was bachelor number whatever, two, three. I was going to pick Gary.

But you didn't. I wanted to pick Gary. I really, really wanted to. Also, Gary's also from The Golden Bachelor. He is also from The Golden Bachelor. He also can cook very well. But the salmon really got me. Oh, yeah. There was something about the salmon. I have to be honest with you. I listened to that episode, as I do listen to all of, I do part two episodes. And I'm like listening to it. And it was so, I'm sorry, Kelly. But like, I was like, this is no, no, no, no, no. It was so awkward.

Awkward. My kids get so pissed when I do that. It was so kind of cringe. No, I mean, you didn't feel like that. You know, I was having so much fun. And I think one thing that's been really great about being on I Do Part Two is that I started with therapy. And then every single time that we would film, I'd

and be on the podcast and in the pod, I was applying what I was learning. I love that. And so not only was I learning new, you know, a new, not a narrative, people like, it's not a narrative. I was learning how to apply what,

my new tools in my tool belt for times when I needed it. I was also learning when things were triggering me from the night past. You and I have talked about this before, about being wildly insecure and having men not be exactly like, not choosing...

Good men. Right. You know, being around men that were not, not really good for me. And so I've made this concerted effort to really. Be more open. Be more open, be more vulnerable and be more respectful of myself. I love that. So I was like salmon for the win. Right.

But I'm saying even with all of that, when I started these three- I know that makes sense, but it makes sense to me. No, it does. What you're saying is you were more open and you were more open because when I listened to it, what I thought was none of these three guys are for Kelly. Absolutely not. Kel, you're a cool cat.

And not that these, I'm not trying to say that these guys are not cool, but different. They're, they felt, you know what I'm talking about. The face you're making is like, she's like, they're like different. No, they were such nice guys. Listen, I'm not married to a cool cat. Let's get real. My husband, Jeff Fessler is, there's nothing cool about him. He's amazing.

I agree, but he's not cool. These guys, I don't know. I just didn't see any of them for you. He is cool because you can take him anywhere. And he is like very, very easygoing. And you can take these three guys anywhere too, but I'm saying like even their responses, they were just a little cringe. I feel like they were a little, come

Come on. You know what I'm saying? But you, yes, I think that it's great that you were open and you were like, does it matter? He likes salmon. I like salmon. This could work. But you know what? That I think, Jen, too, is that that was that's one of the things that I think is really important when you are dating is that not to date the person that you want, but

but to start dating and be in the pool because you never know who you're going to meet. And also, you don't know that, you know how they, you know, it's like you did there. It was like, Oh my God, you could get a kiss, a couple million frogs and you, and you meet the prince. But so many times you don't know that the prince is the frog. You don't know that. Kelly, I agree. And,

all of it, you know, by the way, you're a hundred percent right. So, but you, if you're not in it, you're going to knock. I mean, what? Well, I'm going to sit at my, sit at home on my, on my dating app being like, this guy's hot. This guy's hot. No, you gotta be. Yes. Listen to it. I was like, physically engaging with men. Because I was like, Oh God, none of these three kids, not,

There's nothing wrong with him. But I'm just saying, it's like none of these guys are for Kelly as I was listening to it. But the truth is you're right. And it's like great advice. It's that... You have to be in it. You have to... And right. You have to give it some... You have to like...

I used to say this. You know how women, you know what? You know what? It's like there's, it's been interesting too because one person said to me, dating is like a job and you have to treat it like a job. Yes. You know how like you're like up and you go to the gym and your hair is blown out and you're ready to go and you're on your phone calls and you're on your emails. You have to do

the same thing with the date you have to be like dressed you have to be ready to go you have to be well rested you have to have like a good dress you have to like be mindful interesting yes going out to meet a guy if it were me right now and I was single even when I was single in my 20s I had dates all the time because I always said yes didn't matter like if they were whatever it was because it was just a drink or it was just I never made dinner dates and more often than not

You're also very easygoing. Right, right. But I would say any woman right now. I mean, literally, you can talk to wet paint. I mean, you are very, very. I am a very outgoing person, but I'm also wildly insecure. So I present as outgoing, but I am super, super, very, very reserved and literally like

Peace to the planet. I go by the name of Charlemagne Tha God. And guess what? I can't wait to see y'all at the third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. That's right. We're coming back to Atlanta, Georgia, Saturday, April 26th at Pullman Yards. And it's hosted by none other than Decisions Decisions, Mandy B and Weezy. Okay, we got...

We'll be right back.

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California Psychics.

You opened yourself up, though, to these three guys that I thought were completely cringe. They were like, what are you doing? I don't mean it like that. I just mean like a little bit. Yeah, I do. But if you're my best friend, I'm telling you, it doesn't matter. Kelly, pick one and let's play it out. Let's see what happens. And that's what I did. They were just on. You know what? They were holding microphones in their hair. They were being recorded and maybe they were awkward. But I didn't see them.

And you didn't see, right. So I did not see them. So it was like the dating game. So I had no idea. I did not. So I, I couldn't make a judgment based on physical. I love all. Yes, you're right. I'm wrong. You a hundred percent. I'm glad that you. No, you're not wrong. No, they were cringy, but like you did the right thing. I'm glad that you picked one. You went out or you didn't go out with him. It turns out that he was cringy. And then you moved on to Gary, who's very sweet. And you,

took to the iHeart Music Awards. Yes. And I know, but it didn't, obviously, I don't, there's no ring on your finger, or it's not going to be a, it doesn't sound like it was a forever date, but yes. And it made me feel really good. Okay. And so after we left that night, and I got to meet you, and I was in a really good mood, and I had a lot of fun. And then when I left and went back to New York, I

I felt really good about myself. And that's the other thing that's good about going on a lot of different dates is that because you don't even know who these people are. One guy said to me something that was really interesting. He said, let's just go on a date because the worst thing that could happen is we could be really good friends. I used to preach that shit.

I'm just saying. I'm telling you, it's true. No one told me that. No one ever said that to me. If there's not a connection, like maybe you know someone, maybe I know someone. Right. That's how people should look at dating. Yes. Like, it's just, we're just two people. And I have done that before. I have gone on a date and I'm thinking to myself, this guy's not good for me, but I'm going to introduce him to my friend. Yeah. I've done that many times. Yes.

Okay. So Gary was not for you. I don't remember. I don't know why he wasn't for you, but let's just, I'm going to assume. But we love Gary. We love Gary, but it wasn't a love connection. No. Okay. But I love him. He's amazing. And then you got a DM from.

I'll let you take it from here. Yes. So tell us about that. So I had no idea who this was and I get a lot of DMS. I, I do. I'm not going to sit here and bullshit you guys. I get a lot of DMS of people. Sometimes they're for real. Sometimes they're not. And so he was like, I'm from Chicago. And, and,

Like no one ever comes off and is like, I'm from Chicago. I was like, wait, I'm sorry, what? What do you mean? You say that a lot. Why? Is that so unusual to be from Chicago? Well, because I'm from Rockford. So it's like that's close proximity. Okay. It's like if someone says that, I don't know, like- Texas. Okay. Yeah, like Texas. Okay. Right? They're from near your hometown or like- Houston or something. All right. Or they went to college with you in Boston or something. Okay. You know what I mean? Okay. They were like-

I never meet people that are in my circle. And so it's nice to know that there's someone there who kind of understands or that has a baseline understanding. So we don't have to be like,

Oh, you know, what's, you know, you know, what do you guys, what do you guys eat in Illinois? People always ask me, I'm like, what do you mean, what do we eat? Like cheese, obviously. Right. I'm joking. It's a joke. So he, so he. But people ask me that all the time. So what do they eat there? I'm like food. Like. I never thought I'd ask anyone from Chicago that. Because you're a sophisticated woman. What do you eat there? I'm talking about, I'm talking about guys. Oh, we have to talk about Pascal.

So I'm trying, right. So what was interesting is that when he was saying all those things, is that he was talking about things that made me feel comfortable. He was talking about Illinois and he was like, oh, I'm a hairdresser. You have beautiful hair. He was talking, I mean, I know that sounds...

weird, but it was also very nice too. Like, um, and you know, he was on this show and he knew both Guy and Gary who I, I didn't, I don't know Guy, but I mean, I did have some, um, I did read some of his texts. Um, and then, you know, I obviously spent some time with Gary who was so lovely and so did you. And, um,

So, yeah. So there were there was like a common denominator. Right. Right. So he slid in. I really hate that expression. He slid in to your DMs and said, I'm from Chicago. Great. So now you guys made the connection. And so I didn't know who he was because you didn't watch The Golden Bachelor. Right. Right. Or Bachelorette. Right. I mean, I've watched The Bachelor for a thousand years, but I hadn't watched The Golden Bachelor. OK. And so I didn't know who he was. Right.

And you were open as you are. He told me he was on it and he was mentioning these people. So again, like there was like a, there was like, so he wanted to meet you. So he said, let's meet. And then what you said, um,

You called the producer, said, okay, so here's this guy. Let's set it up. And they said, why don't you guys meet now? Well, I just was like, what is going on here? Is this going to be like guy number two? Does he just want to meet me because he, you know, like I'm on Housewives and he was on The Bachelor and he wants to like, you know, you never, you don't know. Right. Like I was talking about, you know, I was just saying that like when I would go on dates, I would think that people were like, oh, I want to date her because she's wild and crazy because people would call me crazy. I'm from Scary Island.

I'm the least crazy person. I'm like so grounded. It's ridiculous. But they thought, and then they were bored. They're like, oh, she's just really... Not crazy. She just eats cheese. I'm just joking. She wants to eat salmon and eats cheese. Right. But, you know, that was one of the, those were the things that were happening. So to meet someone that was, you know, common, you know, the common denominator sounded like really interesting and appealing. And I was like, oh, maybe he's great. Right. So then...

Now here we are. Now here we are in Napa. So we set it up. The producer said, let's do it in Napa, right? So we talked over, we were on a podcast together. Okay. And we spoke. I actually know that. I listened to it. And he was very charming. He is very charming. Very, very charming. I mean, I was not answering the questions correctly. You know, he was like, they were like, if you could go on, if you could go, Bob was like, if you could go, you know, on a date with Kelly, where would you take her? And he said this very, very nice thing.

um this really nice date and i was like oh i would take you to gibson's and show you my playboy cover what's wrong with that i don't know i mean i was making total jerk well obviously not too much of a jerk because he showed up in napa right i mean i was just like you know what like it's hard that's a hard scenario where you're being asked these questions i mean you asked those guys like if you were a rooster and i was a chicken what would be your cockadoodle do i would die like like i was like

Okay, but I wasn't fusing the tools in my tool bag because I'm supposed to be open and vulnerable. And here I was talking about my Playboy cover and like how you should like look at it. Sorry, I'm a Kelly fan. So I'm going to say that there's nothing wrong with that. Sorry.

Peace to the planet. I go by the name of Charlemagne Tha God. And guess what? I can't wait to see y'all at the third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. That's right. We're coming back to Atlanta, Georgia, Saturday, April 26th at Pullman Yards. And it's hosted by none other than Decisions Decisions, Mandy B and Wheezy. Okay, we got the R&B Money Podcast with Tank and J. Valentine.

We got the Woman Evolved podcast with Sarah Jake Roberts, the Funky Friday podcast with Cam Newton, the Naked Sports podcast with Carrie Champion, Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast, the Trap Nerd podcast, and many more will be on that stage live. And of course, it's bigger than podcasts. We're bringing the Black Effect marketplace with Black-owned businesses, plus...

the food truck court to keep you fed while you visit us. All right, listen, you don't want to miss this. Tap in and grab your tickets now at black effect.com slash podcast. There's a lot in life that feels like it should be guaranteed. That just isn't. Fortunately, AT&T guarantees connectivity. You can depend on, or they'll make it right. AT&T connecting changes. Everything terms and conditions apply. Visit att.com slash guarantee to learn more.

Homeowners, if you want to sell your house fast for all cash, stop what you are doing and listen to this because Osborne Homes wants to buy your house right now. I'm Alec from Osborne Homes and we want to buy your house. Nobody buys more homes in California than Osborne. Whether it's a total fixer-upper or in perfect condition, Osborne Homes is the easiest way to sell your house fast, all cash. Best of all, when you sell your house to Osborne Homes, you're going to get a free house.

There are zero commissions, zero fees, plus no banks, no realtors, no repairs, and no waiting to close. We buy your house as is, all cash. Just go to OsborneHomes.com right now to get your free, no obligation, all cash offer. We are here and ready to buy your house 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

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By the way, guys, if you don't know, Pascal is French. Yes, from Paris. Yes, he's from Paris. He owns... Multiple salons. In Chicago, correct? Like five? Yes. He's a big businessman. Yes. Your husband, ex-husband is French, excuse me. You were raised in Illinois. Clearly, there's a common thread. Right. Common threads, I should say. So you meet him, first impression, good looking, fit. Right. Okay. Good looking and fit. And I met him and I was...

I mean, I met him this morning and I was in a bikini. He literally saw me. So that is the way to go. I saw you and then I saw him. I was like, I want to see me today in a bikini. It's been great. If I were Kelly Ben Simone, I would definitely meet a first date in a bikini. That'd be a smart move. So...

So just so you guys. That was not the intention, by the way. Whether or not it was the intention, it worked. So now we go. I also had weird shoes on, too, and a big robe. I don't think you saw that. So we all. So you saw him in your bikini. And then what? Then we all got into the sprinter van. Yes. OK, so now you guys are chit chatting in the sprinter van. Yes. We're all kind of chit chatting. Yes. We get to the concert. You guys, we were not all sitting together. So just tell me a little bit about that.

What your thoughts are. How'd you feel? So Deanna and I, we know each other from another podcast and we've, we, we hit it off really, really well. She was on, she's a beautiful, beautiful girl from Bachelor Nation. She was on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. And so we were, we, the three of us were sitting together. You were off getting photos with like this rock star, that rock star, country music stars. And I was sitting with him and he was very, very, very nice. But then he would get up and disappear. Yeah.

And then come back. And, you know, when you're on a date, like I'm not expecting you to like kiss my feet, but when you're on a date with me or a supposed date or, you know, even if you're just meeting me, I expect to see some kind of genuine interest. Yeah.

And it wasn't like he was doing the French thing, which is like disinterested. He was just like kind of distant. And he was also like asking me questions instead of being like, hey, you know, listen, you never know who you're going to meet. Do you know what I mean? And who knows? Maybe I was open to it. But because he was kind of weird with me, it made me uncomfortable. And just like I hung out with Dan the whole time.

So this is the beautiful thing, guys, if you're listening and you're single about dating is like, you're here to tell the story. You're either in it or you're not. And, you know, who knows? Again, we talked about kissing frogs. You don't know who the prince is or the princess is if you don't try. Yeah. And, you know, how do you know that I'm interested or not interested? You think that he was intimidated and then...

I don't know. I don't think he was intimidated. I think that he was trying to figure out what's going on and what's happening. And, um,

I think that you have to take every, we talked about this before, you have to take every opportunity. Yeah. Like if you see a hot girl on the subway, hello, here's my number, I want to talk to you, whatever. You have to take the initiative because that moment's going to go. So if you don't say like, hey, I would love to do X, Y, or Z or whatever, how am I supposed to know?

Wow. I'm very interested to hear his take. Yes. Because me too. It's hard for me to picture a scenario where he was not very interested in you, but I guess we'll find out. But yeah, listen. So, okay. So right now, before we bring, I'm going to talk to Pascal and then talk to both of you, but you feel like he just wasn't present present. And okay. That's a perfect word. Not present. So that was a turnoff.

Wildly turned off. Whereas like Gary was like, we were walking down the red carpet at iHeartRadio with every famous musician and you getting photos with all those famous musicians. Yeah, I know. I know.

And he was the most charming, lovely human. He was like, are you okay? Is everything all right? Well, Pascal did mention to me that he does think that Gary has a very big thing for you. So I don't know if that has anything to do with this. I will ask him, but he did say that. But you know what I'm saying. Yes, I know exactly what you're saying. I think that a man, you know when a man likes you. Yeah. You know. Yeah.

Well, I'm going to know because I'm going to ask him. And sometimes you know because they do the opposite. Like they'll be mean to you or they'll say, you know what I mean? They'll like poke you. You think you could have liked him though? There was potential for it?

You know, I was on the podcast with him and then I met him today. And I think he's a really, really, really incredible person. Do I think he's the right person for me? I don't think so. And you know, one of the reasons that he's not is because, to be honest with you, is because he's French. Like, I already...

Your ex. Married a Frenchman. I already know what that's about. Maybe you sense that from you. And by the way, and I love French culture and I love Frenchmen, but I don't want to be married to another Frenchman. Fair enough. I just don't. I'll speak French all day long with you. We can be pen pals. We can talk on the phone. I just do not want to be married to another Frenchman. I want a family for my family. I want a real man who loves my kids-

Because they didn't have that family environment. They only had me as their parent. And I want a man who's nurturing and loving, not only to me, but also to our family. I did hear Pascal say in the episode you guys did together that he really is not interested in any small kids, which is okay. He has been a father. He does not want to be a father again. And so I don't know if...

That struck you at all? It did. But when I was listening, I was like, well, even if your kids are...

of a certain age. There's still, you know, you want somebody that wants to embrace. They still need to be, they're still in that process. I mean, they're still going, they're still meeting men. They're still, you know, navigating their, their work, their work life. They're navigating, you know, their new future and they're going to have, be having children. And I definitely want to be a thousand percent a part of every part of it. Yes. So that's just super important to me. That is really, family is,

It's paramount to my happiness. I think it is to his too, but whatever. There was a disconnect here. All right. But like, I mean, like family together all the time, boys up together all the time. Yes. And I don't care how old the kids are. My ex had younger children. Like I don't, I'm not worried about having, about being around younger children. I just want a family for my family. I love that.

It's the greatest expression. Do you make that up? Yes. I love it. All right. We're going to bring Pascal in and then we're going to bring you both in together. I'm a wordsmith. You didn't know that. You are a wordsmith amongst other things, amongst many, many, many other talents. No, but it's important. You know, you have to, I think that's the other thing that I learned from this whole entire process. There's two things that I've learned. One is to be vulnerable and

but also protective. There's a very, very, very fine line of being vulnerable where you're not protecting yourself. That is not what I want. So I want to be open and available to this new life that I have and this new life partner, but I also want to make sure that I'm protecting myself because I never did that before. So that's really important. And then having a family for my family has been always what I've wanted for my entire life.

Okay. Well, it's coming. So enjoy the time. Enjoy the time you're having right now being single. It's not going to last forever. I can promise you that. And now you're out of here because I want to talk to Pascal. Oh my God. All right, you guys. Thank you. Why were you not present? All right, my girl. Thank you. See you back here. Bye. Love you. Bye.

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