VENMO JOELLA (w/ Aaron Jackson + Josh Sharp)
01:58:28 Share

This is an iHeart Podcast.

Please drink responsibly. Imported by Casamigos Spirits Company, White Plains, New York. Casamigos Tequila, 40% alcohol by volume.

Summer is quickly approaching and there's no better time to make sure you're feeling your best. Keep your gut health in check with the help of HealthAid Kombucha. It's powered with probiotics, which helps you feel less bloated. Plus, it's made with real fruit juice, so it's deliciously refreshing. With so many delicious flavors like Pink Lady Apple, Passion Fruit Tangerine, and Pomegranate Blueberry, it's the perfect bubbly beverage to enjoy as the weather heats up. Look for the brown bottle with an anchor on it at a store near you. For over

80 years people have turned to and trusted Nair for their expertise in bladeless hair removal. Throughout the years, Nair has remained iconic. The beauty of Nair isn't just about what it removes, it's about what Nair adds. Feeling self-assured, unapologetic, and bold. What started as a single formula, single scent depilatory cream has expanded into a range of innovative products with magical multitasking formulas that help provide smooth, stunning skin for all people in all parts.

Our executive producer, Anna, tried the Nair Sensitive Coconut Oil Shower Cream and couldn't get enough of how easy it was to use. She said her skin was feeling incredibly smooth after just one use and loves that it's free of dyes, parabens, phthalates, and sulfates. Plus, the new Nair Cream smell is heavenly. Get ready for summer. Buy now at all major retailers.

Hey readers, it is so thrilling to tell you about a new podcast from the iconic, the incomparable Michelle Obama and her big brother Craig called IMO. You know, on Lost Culture Recess, we dive deep into the culture and get real with our guests. Likewise, on IMO, Michelle, Craig, and their guests tackle questions from listeners just like you, offering practical advice, personal storytelling, and plenty of laughs.

From dating and relationships to family and faith, Michelle and Craig give their candid perspectives to the everyday questions shaping our lives and the world around us. Like their first episode where Issa Rae laments friendships that need to go. You'll hear Michelle and Craig's stories about being there for each other throughout their lives, from first crushes and fraught college years to landing at the White House to losing their mom.

For six decades, they've been each other's most trusted counsel, and now they want to be that counsel for you. So if you want to know about the culture that made Michelle and Craig say culture is for them, check out IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson, wherever you get your podcasts. Look, Matt. Oh, I see. Wow. Bowen, look over there. Wow, is that culture? Yes. Oh, my goodness. Wow. Las Culturistas. Ding dong, Las Culturistas calling. Well...

This episode was supposed to start a different way. Tell them of the bit. Do the bit. Tell them of the bit that was denied. Even better. Let's do the bit. I felt like... Wasn't feeling like a safe environment for the bit once I brought it to the floor. No one... Let's try the bit and see how it plays. The bit was going to be Bowen and Josh Sharp start the show as if nothing...

- No one was the wiser. - But tell them why. - Because Aaron and I came today sort of wearing a shirt. - Shirt. - Buttoned down. - Sort of like buttoned down shirts with like-- - With a bold statement. - Buttoned down realness. - Bright statements and bold patterns. - Bright colors and bold patterns. - Drew Droege. - Was I referencing it? - We'll never know. - And therefore was the correction right to do? - I was a riff, not a correction. - Oh.

Can you tell my guard is up? Yeah. You seem hackled. This is where it started to break down bit wise. Josh and I are wearing t-shirts. Aaron and Matt are wearing button downs. With bold statements and bright patterns. Right. And so not a Drew Droege reference. Title of app. Not a Drew Droege reference. Title of app. Title of app. Not a Drew Droege reference. Title of app. But I think it just, it broke down because Matt was saying, okay, so then Josh and Matt, as in I, as in Matt, Josh and I will start the show. No, I never said that. No, I never said that.

I do think ultimately... Let us try it. Let us try it. Sure. Okay, start the show. Ding dong. Dong. Last culture to rest. This is where it did it. This is where it broke down. I said it was... Matt said that Matt and Josh would be the host of the show. That the air tonight would come in later. That doesn't make any goddamn sense because I said if... Okay. If...

Aaron and I were both wearing statement shirts with bright colors and bold patterns. We would sit on one couch and you and Joshua, who are both in more simple tees, would start the show. Yeah. Let us try again. So you want to see the logic? Let us try again. Let us try again. Start the episode. Three, two, one. Ding dong. Las Culturistas calling. Garou.

Epic Orlando was universal, y'all. It was the universal experience for the guys, gals, and gays. Now that the bit keeps going. You were to be Matt, were you to be the guest? You were to be Aaron and Matt would have been the guest. Can I just say what the dream of the bit was? And maybe if with more time, we could have executed the bit.

is if Bowen Yang and Josh Sharp had started the podcast and not said anything. It was just Bowen and Josh starting it. And then we come in, me and Aaron Jackson, and we don't even mention it. You gave Josh and I the keys to your car, which makes us feel a little, a little, I will say. Y'all didn't know how to drive sticks.

But it's your car that you were like, I've got a car. Y'all drive. It's a beautiful Honda CRV. You screamed at us. I guess I thought that the instructions for how to drive the car were clearer than they were. It's kind of an Andy Kosman style bit that really just...

box with the form. What's crazy is I didn't even think it was that crazy. I didn't think it was. To not address it? It was not. That's crazy. It was wild. Communicated. And this is what episode. To me, it's the bit is what is so shocking. This is episode 14 or 15 of the pod, right? Y'all have been doing it forever dog. Cut that out. Cut that out. You have to cut that out. We're fledgling. You know what's funny? What year are we in actually? People have been begging for this.

People have been begging for this cacophony. We're in year nine, doll. Ah, yes. Year nine. We're in year nine. Ah, yes. And the cacophony is back. This is an Obama-era podcast? I'll never forget. Technically, yes. Technically, it was the last months of the Obama presidency. So then, yes. I'm sorry. Do not raise your voice. I didn't. I didn't!

What would you guys say was the culture that made you say culture was for you? Because I knew you. Because I knew you. Because I knew.

- I didn't really get culture until two weeks ago on Thursday night. - And then you saw what culture was when you saw Rosie O'Donnell have a great Emmy winning guest star. - Right. Y'all learned about culture at the O'Mary Tony's party, which we were not invited to. - You didn't get the invite. - Well, I don't think we did. - I actually don't think we did, which is okay. - Do you think Cole is mad at you? - I think so. - And for what?

I don't know, but apparently Cole. And are you mad at Cole? Now they are. Now. I'm going to wait to say yes or no. For a likely yes, but I'm going to wait. Okay. To say if I'm mad.

- I see. - 'Cause what were you gonna say? - I think it's all, I'm only mad at Cole if they're mad at me. Does that make sense? And that, and that is, that, that, it's tip for tat, and that happens all the time with you. - I'm mad at Cole. - Yeah. - I think it's the same with crushes. So you might not realize you're into someone until they say I'm into you and you say, oh, mutual. - Yeah. - Let's boogie.

But then does that make you second guess it at all? You're like, oh, this was contingent on them having a crush on me. To me, it makes me propose. Yeah. Propose anal or marriage? Oh, penetrative anal. I mean, someone being attracted to you is a turn on. Turn on. Right. But wouldn't you say? Yes. It's one of other guys' best qualities when they want to fuck me. My favorite thing about you is that you like me.

That's actually a good greeting card. My favorite thing about you, and you open it, is that you like me. Winky face emoji, happy whatever day. I don't care. It's a rule of culture. As hosts allow me to say, that's a rule of culture. Wait, what was? My favorite thing about you is that you like me. Which number is that? That's...

1,691. My favorite thing about you is that you like me. Now, I just want to go back to something that Aaron put out there. A card and a Venmo request. I just want to, can I observe something? Part of Aaron's sort of lexicon of comedy is to end a

esteem and with Venmo I mentioned Venmo or Joella or both as in a call to action Venmo Joella and it's funny to hear you describe that as comedic because I would say it's incredibly serious or

We're all laughing. When you say, both can be true. Yes, thank you. Venmo Joella. Wait, maybe I'm listening. Pause your podcast and Venmo Joella. I do have to say that the title of ep has to be Venmo Joella. So can we explain who Joella is? Joella was a drag race contestant on season, I'm not sure, 17, 49. And if you don't know that, don't listen to this podcast.

Just Venmo Joella. This is the wrong podcast for you. She had a two-episode run, would we say? Three, I think. Three, and it was, I would say, sensational. It was absolutely sensational. A lot with a little. Yeah. I think history will look back kindly on this season. She'll probably get brought back at some point. It was so... I mean, she really made a mark. Can I say, like...

I was almost ready to say something snide when you said she'll probably get brought back soon because I feel like they're bringing everybody back for all-stars. But then I will also say I'm kind of eating my hat with the girls that I thought weren't going to give on all-stars because I'm enjoying every group of all-stars. They're all good. Because they're giving and gaving. They're giving and gaving and gaping. The guys involved. Venmo Joella. Venmo Joella. Venmo Joella. I give them all...

all propers because I'm entertained thoroughly the tournament of all stars I like the tournament I like 666 me too oh devil I said what I said devilish devilish

Yeah. Play this podcast while you watch Wizard of Oz. Sync them up. Oh, yeah. And you will speak to the devil. Josh and I were at the gay bar twist in Miami, Florida. And it was the weekend mayhem. Lady Gaga's mayhem came out. Sure. And in that front bar, if you've ever been, it's sort of just casual with televisions. And they played mayhem and started House of Gucci at the same time as if it was Wizard of Oz. It synced up. I don't.

know that that's insane. Two what? Anytime. Two what? If just like Adrian Brody, if it would like cut, not Adrian Brody, Jared Leto. No, Adam Driver. Adam Driver. It would like cut and it would be Adam Driver. There's an A. Sorry, Adam. If it was like on the beat and we cut to him, we'd just scream. They sing

- On the beat. - You know, just like, if a cop matched up with a bee. - It's like, I'm to take you to the garden. I'm like garden, I'm screaming. - So anyway, everybody do that. Venmo Joella, pause the podcast. Venmo Joella, pause again. Sync up, man.

- Do you have an hour long album with a two hour long movie? - Yes. - Loop it. - Just loop the track. - Do you have a suggested donation to Joel or is it sort of pay what you can? - Pay what you will, but honey, if you are going to a pride event that costs over $50,

at least $6,000. Yeah, exactly. It's proportionate. That's what Radiohead said about In Rainbows in 2007. They said, Tom said, if you're going to a Pride event, In Rainbows costs over $50. You pay us $6,000 for this album. I gotta tell you, one of my biggest cultural blind spots is Radiohead. That's okay. They're always cracked my top five. What? Is that true? That's my big boy. You, I believe. I didn't know that about you. You're listening to the fuck

in a revival of parade. You're listening to ragtime. No, I'm not. I'm listening to OBC ragtime. Can I give to your people one of the kindest things you've ever done? Because you know, me, Aaron, and Patrick are big Bjork girls. Yes. So when her last album came out, we got a text from you that said, girls, I wanted you to know I really tried to listen to the new Bjork album. I did. But I had to turn it off halfway through. I found a lot of the...

Imagery. Imagery to be disturbing. Yeah. I did. I really appreciate this. I mean, I made a really good that you put that up from a weird girl, a weird girl album. She has more like this is a song with a chorus type of album. Yeah. I mean, here's the thing. I there's nothing like sort of like being in Fire Island and watching all your sister's vibe on. I think it was.

some hallucinogenic and watching you not just listen to but commune with both nature and Bjork. - I was existing inside of a Bjork song. - What's the song, it's from "A Vespertine." What was the song that we were vibing to? - "Hunter"? - Not "Hunter," no, no, no, "A Vespertine."

Where it was the, with like, we're fucking like, Oh, that's Diophilia. We were listening to, Crystalline. Crystalline. Crystalline. Yes. Yes. The best song on that. Is FKA Twigs one of the daughters of Bjork? Absolutely. Yeah. Kind of all of them are. There's many. Yeah. Sega Bodega is a daughter of Bjork. Caroline Polachek's a daughter of Bjork. Yeah. You feel that way. I didn't know you were a metal head.

well i like hardcore so talk so josh is wearing a turnstile i'm really trying to get gay guys into turnstile this summer everyone was at the turnstile show the other week yeah who would you describe as everyone because i wish there were more people of all shapes and sizes basically when we're talking about everyone there's no real signifier it would just be anyone you could think of could be there in that moment when we say everyone and i want to take back that question cut that

- I have a question from the episode. - No, don't, don't, don't, don't. - I say the cuts. - I say the cuts. - I say the cuts for everyone, TuraStyle is for everyone. - TuraStyle is for everyone. - I had such a good time. - You should go. - You should go. It is, I find hardcore, it's like a queer space where it's sort of radically accepting. - It's hardcore, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say metal, yeah. - But hardcore people are radically accepting in a way that queer people are, you know? They're like all shapes, all sizes get in the pit. You know what I mean? - You said radically accepting. - Yeah. - I just didn't hear you correctly.

I love hardcore music. I love Fugazi. Gay guys should get into Fugazi. Gay guys should get into Fucked Up. Gay guys should get into Turnstile. I like Fucked Up. I've listened to Fucked Up. I love Canadian, your Canadian siblings. How would gay guys benefit from getting into this particular music? I need to know. What is it about gay men that they're missing? That can be found in this genre? This is a great point. Pop doesn't have a lot of rage. And I do think there's a lot of-

- Sure. - Other than Olivia and Roger, you haven't. - I've sung it live with you. - That was a sad moment. You haven't heard her really go off. - She says the F word in that song. - Yeah, right. - Can we cuss on this pod? - Yeah, you can cuss. - Okay, she's faggot. - Bug it, bug it. - See, that wasn't the one I was expecting. - That was the one you would say. - You're catching me off guard in this climate, that's for sure. - I think you might like Radiohead because Josh always says Tom York taught Josh vibrato.

That's beautiful. One of our great male singers. I know you're lacking in male singers you like. Something else we learned in Fire Island. We said name your favorite male singer. It took you so long. And then you said Stevie Wonder, question mark. But did I arrive at a slayer? No, you arrived at a slayer. That's a great answer. It's not so much that you disparage male singers. You just worship female singers so much. Can I ask you a question? Is there room for the possibility that maybe I was just being thoughtful?

in the end of that game and that's why there was a little bit of time maybe y'all need to be more thoughtful before you speak the way you shout out yeah you're right the way you shout out maybe you need to be more thoughtful there is room for the idea that you were being thoughtful in that moment you weren't but there's room we are more united than ever we are more united than ever oh my god power of the room power of the room power of the dog

What if I just didn't let it go the whole time and he just really started to fight and I just didn't? Ow, my wrist. My tender wrist. What's Matt's syllabus on Radiohead, you think? I think, okay, computer. Or in Rainbows. I sometimes find that's a really good starter album. It's prettier music. The Benz is good.

I love the Benz. Benz is like a good starter. First chorus, first chorus, which is nice. It's pop. But I'd be curious what you think of In Rainbows. In Rainbows is really good. Okay, I'll start there. I really will. Yeah. And I'll send you a Bjork-esque text. Hi, guys. How is everyone doing today? I want you to know I started In Rainbows and I got approximately six songs in before I found the imagery disturbing. It's not disturbing. It really is a gorgeous album. It starts a little, but then it gets really pretty.

I guess it being called In Rainbows, that would sort of, you know, assuage us of the idea there's going to be terrors within the Sonic landscape. Now, there's a song on In Rainbows called House of Cards. It's not about the TV show, so don't get scared of that. It's not a Spacey reference. No. But how great was he on that, you know? Bring him back.

- How great was he in that role? - Whatever happened to him? - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, he should be O'Mary. - He should replace Cole. - If Kevin Spacey was Mary Todd. - Cole, Cole, hear us out. - Please, please put Kevin Spacey in O'Mary. - There's no drag queen doing anything as subversive as Kevin Spacey as O'Mary. - Joella,

- Joella accepting. - Joella as Mary's teacher. - Vinmo Joella. - And Zell Kevin Spacey. - No, actually this is the actual casting. Joella as Mary. Kevin Spacey as Abe. - Yes. - As Mary's husband. And who's Mary's teacher? - James Scully reprises the role. - He goes back in. - No one does it better. - Could you beat the best?

Whereas the other two can easily be beat. - Yeah. - The Tony nominees. - I think Cole and Conrad, I've seen it. - I've seen it. - You know what I mean? And we're mad at Cole. - And we're mad at Cole. - Remember from earlier?

How was the party? Joyful. A total gag. A gag and joyful. Oh, I love that. Joyful. Please be, please be earnest. Well, this year we found, we were saying how much like many of our dear friends were nominated for this. It's crazy. I'm seeing it today. I'm so excited. It's really interesting.

I've seen it twice. I've actually, I actually went two days in a row. And you talked about it on the pod, maybe even. I talked about it, but I would love to talk about it again. The thing for them to know is that Kimmy Bellflower, who wrote it, who's incredible. Yeah. Grew up with my boyfriend in like one stoplight rural town. Yeah. And so they, as teenagers pledged to be like, if you ever get nominated for a Tony, I'll take you. And so they went. And so Blake went.

I will say he did look fantastic. Plus one who made the carpet and the Vogue right up. And then have you seen Dead Outlaw starring Andrew Durand? Not yet. I am an Andrew Durand fan. I loved him in Shocked. He was so good in Shocked. Spring Awakening, Inc. So he was on Melissa Chernoborne with Cynthia Rivo over in the West End.

Why did they ever bring that here? Because we're dumb. I think it didn't run that long there. I don't think it ran that long there. No offense. The shucks of it all made me... A show with jokes. A show with real jokes made me realize last night I saw Alex Newell at the Mets Pride game. She sang the National Anthem down. I bet she did. Taking it back. One of the few who's probably like, could we raise it actually? Could we make it higher? Oh, 100%. And then Jeremiah Brandt threw out the first pitch.

Yep. And I saw Jan was there in the full get up. Jan is one of my favorite people to kind of just say. She sang it at a, she sang the national anthem recently. She gave pre-shows. They were singing in the K corner. I love that. So Jan was giving pre-shows and they kept calling it the K corner. And I was like, girl, what? Thinking they were like a gay guy and talking about the ketamine. Right. It just means where they knock up where all this, the strikeouts happen. Yeah.

So let me just say for straight culture. This is why gay guys need to listen to hardcore music. You need to stop thinking K means ketamine every second. And you're going to realize it means strikeout. So this is a big difference between straight and queer culture is K to straight men means strikeout and K to gay men means ketamine. This is one way we can start to have a conversation and a dialogue. And it's also class. You're talking about working class. Oh.

For the 1%, K is thousands. 100K, 200K, it's money, y'all. Fight the rich, eat the rich. And then for scientists, it's Kelvin. Yes, Kelvin. Yes, absolutely. And for Kim Kardashian, it's her first and last name.

You know what doesn't belong in your epic summer plans? Getting burned by your old wireless bill. While you're planning beach trips, BBQs, and three-day weekends, your wireless bill should be the last thing holding you back. With plans starting at $15 a month, Mint Mobile gives you premium wireless service on the nation's largest 5G network.

The coverage and speed you're used to, but way less money. So while your friends are sweating over data overages and surprise charges, you'll be chilling, literally and financially. Say bye-bye to your overpriced wireless plans, jaw-dropping monthly bills, and unexpected overages. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you. All plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. Use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with

That's mintmobile.com slash culturistas.

front payment of $45 for three month, five gigabyte plan required equivalent to $15 a month. New customer offer for first three months only then full price plan options available taxes and fees extra cement mobile for details. You know, I'm not big on trends, but I am big on clothes that feel good and last. That's why I keep going back to quince. They're lightweight layers and high quality staples have become my everyday essentials. Quince has

All the things you actually want to wear this summer, like organic cotton silk polos, European linen beach shorts, comfortable pants that work for everything from backyard hangs to nice dinners. The best part? Everything with Quince is half the cost of similar brands. By working directly with top artisans and cutting out the middlemen, Quince gives you luxury pieces without the markups. And Quince only works with factories that use safe, ethical, and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes. Matt, I'm in my linen era this summer when it comes to my clothes.

clothes, and my bedding set that I bought from Quince at a fraction of the price that it would have cost somewhere else. I love linen. It makes you feel light and sexy like a queen. Stick to the staples that last with elevated essentials from Quince. Go to quince.com slash culturistas for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash culturistas to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash culturistas.

You know, a good wedding is like an amazing symphony from the food to the music to the fashion, honey, to the style. When it all comes together, all these things, you can expect love to grow. And that's good because the wedding should all be about that, creating an atmosphere and an environment where love can...

What's the word? Flourish. Flourish. You know, a wedding is all about achieving the vision. And with Zola, you can plan your entire wedding in one convenient place. From the day you get engaged and search for the venue, the day you send out your save the dates, make your registry, and even taste your cake, Zola has literally everything you need to make the whole process super easy. The first and only stop you need to make on your wedding planning journey is Zola. They've thought of everything you'll need and have built every tool possible.

Reckon you know the Brits?

Tea, the queen, saying things weird, bottle of water. Babes, did you know they make unbelievably good TV? Just hits different. The subtle shade disguises polite conversation. Cutest little villages where three people die a week. It's giving unhinged but cosy. And it's all on BritBox.

Sing it differently and start streaming the best of British TV with BritBox. Use promo code CULTURISTAS to get 50% off your first month when you sign up at BritBox.com. Terms and conditions apply.

Clouds is out. Have you seen that? Just a little BB. Whatever. Clouds is out? What is this a reference to? She is a TikTok, but back in the day, just an Instagram star. And she used to, now she does like all sex toys. Like that's her, and lube and stuff. But she used to give inspirational messages. And often they were done where you could only see her nails on camera. And she had this crazy blue synthetic wig. Okay, we're getting visual. Where are you going? Oh yeah.

Oh, that's great. Oh, that's really good. I'm actually really interested in how that works. For everyone listening at home, Josh just crawled on the ground and went to camera and made claws. And I want us in the video to not use that angle. Oh, it's that one. You're being told to go to that one. I'm being told to do it again. No, no. And then we're going to use the opposite camera. That's interesting. This is what you're seeing.

- She'd be like, "Don't use the wide on this please." - Okay, so I just got a delicious dinner. - That's actually, that's very Muppety pie. - I have to say, I am seeing what it's doing in the video. - I really like that. - It was really working. - And she would have nails, nails, nails. - Nails, nails, nails. - And one time she was wearing a blue wig and like eating a lollipop. And she goes, "If you're having yourself a bad day, ask yourself why."

She's sucking lollipops. She's living in Los Angeles. Here I am living in Los Angeles. Trouble don't last for always, bitch. So we say that a lot. Trouble don't last for always, bitch. I have watched that video when experiencing depression. I have it saved for when I'm having a down and I watch her go, living in Los Angeles, clouds is out, trouble don't last for always, bitch. That is beautiful. That is a simplified way of what I've been saying lately, which is a little bit eye rolling, but I'm like despair is a transitional phase. Yes. Trouble don't last for always, bitch. Yes, bitch.

It's two ways of saying that. Absolutely. 100%. I have to say this too. She says wig blowing like a motherfucker. Oh yeah. I mean, come on. That's what she says too. I mean, come on. Wig blowing like a motherfucker. Trouble don't last always, bitch. We'll send it to you. It's beautiful. You can put it in the Instagram.

Trouble don't last for always, bitch is very much a sibling of ain't Miss God cutting up something awful. They're cousins, they're kin. Okay, O'Mary Party, fabulous. For Cole to win to Sam to win. Incredible. Stunning. Two talents that deserve. Then I linked up with Blake and Kimmy and we ended the night. Kimmy who should be on the pod at some point actually. She would be really good. Blake too, but he'd be less fun. Um,

That's a quote probably from him. He'd agree. Then we ended our night at the Plaza Hotel getting banana splits on room service at six in the morning. Oh, I love that. Heaven. Heavenly. And Josh also was going to Pine that day and he came much later. I did not make it on the morning ferry.

because he, you know, did the booger sugar. He did it. Yeah, a banana split at six in the morning. The snow that goes up. The snow that goes up. I had the slopes, the banana split splopes. Now, we didn't even get a chance to mention this because we did not bring y'all in. Oh, I'm Aaron. You're Aaron, and this is Josh. Aaron's on Sandino. I'm on Women in Mid. I'm Sandino. I didn't even realize that didn't happen.

- Wow. - We just have to quickly plug, 'cause we said the name, Sam Pinkleton, Tony winning Sam Pinkleton, who is now directing Josh's show at the Greenwich House Theater. - That's true. - July 7th, called "Ta-Da." - Yes, I'm doing the canonical one man off Broadway experience. - I'm gagged, I'm so excited. I'm coming on opening night.

Yes. You said the opening night is July 7th. You'll be gone. There'll be other chances. But I'm coming. Because it runs through August 23rd. And maybe I'll see a preview. Absolutely. How about that? Seven shows a week. Are you going to be on your vocal health game? I'm going to have to be on my vocal health game. Because even for plays...

- You're still talking. - You're still talking. - Oh, he's the only one talking. - I can't, I don't have a scene partner to yak yak yak. - Do you have an understudy? - No. - Me. - Actually, that would be slaggy. - That would be slaggy. People would love that. - That would be slag. - Yeah, I'll talk about my deep, personal, specific life experience. - I love Josh's show, "Did You See Aaron?"

- Aaron actually really is amazing. - He's amazing. - What are you talking about his mom coming? - Josh is good, Josh is good. But when Aaron talks about Josh's mother's battle with ovarian cancer, it really sings. Literally Aaron sings a lot more. - Do you see spacey as Josh?

Oh, it was so good. Spacey was great. He was amazing. When his mom knew he was gay but didn't know how to broach the subject. You know, because I didn't think Josh was that hot, but I thought Kevin was really sexy in the role. He looked very in his body. I think since he's come out, he's become even better. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We'll never know if Kevin Spacey was a better actor as an out gay man, you know? Yeah. When he was outed after he was...

Yeah. We don't have to talk about this anymore. Someone has to. Well, I just got my, I don't think so, honey. Everyone's too afraid. Don't you think everyone's too afraid? Everyone is too afraid to get into it. Too afraid to make spacey jokes, less Instagram find out and say, Hey, here's a grab of them talking about how they wish spacey was given another chance to become an out gay actor. When did we lose him? Um,

To society's disdain. Oh, God. I think when people found out he was raped to minors. I want to know the year. I don't remember. I'm going to imagine 2017. 17. You think it was in the big Me Too of it all? You think he did it right after your pod started? You think they were linked? I think House of Cards going on that long. Yeah, I mean, House of Cards has been what was going on from like 2011. Can I say? Say it. A pilot episode ago. I'm.

I've seen Malcolm in the middle. I've seen the to camera shit. Turning this off. I'm not whispering. I didn't like House of Cards. You never liked it? Say it loud. I liked season one, but I can get loud too, bitch.

I didn't like House of Cards. It's a Sandra Diaz twine club. It's a Sandra Diaz twine club. I can get loud too. We got to talk about the Traderscast too. Oh, yeah. And no one wants to really talk about Australia versus the World Survivor, which is really the big event. Yeah. I would love to know more. Please educate. I do too. This is dull as hell.

Australia. Australian Survivor is now the superior franchise. Oh, please. Absolutely. Has been for a few years. And Australia versus the world is kind of all stars. Yeah. All stars from all the franchises. But there's like, I'm just going to make up numbers like eight Australian Survivor players and then eight internationals. And the US we have are Tony, Parvati and Serene. Wow. Yeah.

- Wow. - Pretty good stuff. And one of the Aussie people is David, the golden God. - David, the golden God, Shawnee. - Shawnee. - King George. - King George. - Oh yeah, this is a good group. - Actress Pia's friend, Joanne or whatever her name is. - Actress Pia's friend. - Actress Pia is my favorite survivor winner of all time. - Yeah, I've heard about Actress Pia. - Actress Pia. - So tell everyone about Actress Pia. - Actress Pia. - I'm not sure I know what that was. - Actress Pia was on a great season of Survivor.

With Luke Taki. And he's going to be back on. Oh, I love Luke. Luke Taki, one Australian big brother. Okay. Anyway, it's just so great. It's going to be great. It's really going to be a sensation. Wow. Even if it flops, it's like impossible that there's like not an amazing episode. I will say I've never seen a group of hotter people than any given Survivor Australia cast, which is something that really is tough about the US version too because we're casting for brains and not always looks, which is fine, but I know we can do both. What about when we go to Fire Island? You don't think that's a hotter group of men? No.

No.

- It'd be picking the hottest, the hottest eight from that hot group and putting them on camera. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And starving them. - From all of what weekend of Fire Island? - Your favorite, your hottest weekend. - Your hottest weekend. - The hottest weekend you've ever been. - Yeah. - 'Cause I bet those Australia survivor guys could never drink an Island Special. Could never drink a Planner's Punch. - And you know what's gotten stronger? Our theory is it's gotten stronger. - They changed the rest of the- - Planner's Punch is fucking crazy. - It's going all crazy this summer. - It's popping off.

it was a different color. I had one and a half planters punches and then I almost went over some guy's house and he said, don't worry, my daughter's asleep. My daughter's asleep. And I was like, okay, maybe if it had been two planters punches, I would have done something like all that. With the child next door. Like, red, your daughter, cat in the hat. I was like, honey, bring your kids to DragCon, no problem. But once I'm in the pool,

- I had two on July the 4th and I got the spins. - You got the spins? - I remember that. - I got the spins. I was like, I have the spins from two of those. - The same year that I beat out. - You beat off. - Beat out. I browned, blacked out. - What is your difference? 'Cause I noticed you use brown out a lot. What's your personal difference? - Brown out you can remember. - Brown out you can remember. No, and I will just say, I don't know why I'm hedging. It was a full blackout. - Yeah, 'cause you lost your wallet. - I'm ashamed. - Oh yeah, and then the island came together. - The island came together.

Wait, can I say something? So first of all, let's tee this up, which is that Bowen lost his wallet and the community, the island went Bowen Yang's wallet. We went crazy to try and find Bowen Yang. Text from every gay in this great nation of ours. Well, very similarly, when I was in Los Angeles the other week doing an out of town tryout of Josh Sharptada, tickets on sale at joshsharptada.com.

I went to Ackbar one night, didn't realize until I was back, I had left my tote bag there with one of those nice water bottles that you're like, oh God, I have to spend $50 on a water bottle again and some sundries. But I was like, whatever, you know, it is what it is. Who do I get a DM from yesterday? - Yesterday? - Ackbar the account. - Wow. - They said your New Yorker magazine was in it with your name on it. So we figured out it's you. Can we mail it to you? Ackbar.

The investigating there. One of the same spaces. The greatest gay bar. I love Ackbar. I gotta give him a follow. Tied with Julius. Have we actually all been together to mourn Barracuda? No. I don't think we have. I was out of town. Actually, let's give space to that because this is now, this could get genuine because for once, we've spoken of some of the lore of just like us and the scene coming together, but Barracuda, we have to put a pin in because that was such like our clubhouse for those formative years. That was really fun.

God, I mean, how many times did we see Bob in the pre-era? And then also, I just think about that was really where we'd go to pre-game concerts. Even still to this day. Even still. I find I like to do it in that, well, RIP, but we would still do that. But I missed those days where we were there truly every week.

seeing drag at one in the morning. - I know, I know. - It was like packed. - Every Monday. - Packed. - It was a Monday, Bob's show was on Monday. - Monday night, 11:00 PM. - But it's all like the best comedy show in the city. - There used to be a two-show night that was we would do fun guy identical twins and then you'd see Bob the drag queen. It's like truly there's no better two-show night. - The best. - And I know half of it is my show. - No, say that. - Proud, proud. - It was wild to get to watch Bob in that era. - It was the Titanic of that time. - It was the Titanic of that time. - Same venue. - Titanic. - That's how you draft it?

I think it can be many different ways. Fuck my ass. Fuck my ass. Well, you are Canadian. Maybe that's how they say it there. Fuck my ass. Perhaps it is. You know what? Yeah. It's like... But CUDA formative. What's formative? Oh, CUDA formative. CUDA formative. It's like, I can't even be like...

I'm just mournful. Like I'm sad. I also, I hooked up a lot there. Like I remember it was like, like pull the pad. No, I've hooked up there. It was like, it was like something about it or not in the space. No, but I know, I know of some filth that's gone that we used to go down in that bathroom. I touched crotches through jeans there. Do you know what I mean? I know of full on breedings.

I know full on readings that happened in the barricuda bathroom. Cause it's, it's a small girl. It's a smelly one. Small and smelly. It's small. It smelt like shit. Yeah. Glossy.

Go figure. All of our great spaces. And also like it was, it was, it was always, it was always busy. It was always, it was never. There was only the one bathroom. Because I think it was just the one. And one stall. Luckily when it closed down, because Aaron and I went like early in the week as soon as we heard, but then I was out of town for the weekend and I was like sort of sad to miss the final festivities. But then I realized if you had told me, by the way, Barracuda closed a month ago, I'd be like,

I put in Malcolm Gladwell 10,000 hours there. Like luckily I had, I had my time. It's not like I'm like, shit, we got to squeeze it in. Right. We really spent a lifetime in Barracuda. Yeah. Yeah. Dang. Love her. Now. One of the best spots to see drag. Truly, truly. Where I saw Alexis Michelle. Yes. The same episode there, Katya got kicked off. Oh, got eliminated in season seven. Katya Gate season seven. Katya Gate season seven. And she was, it was just,

Five of us in that room. Katya No. And me screaming Katya No, tweeting it. And then the community coming after me. The opposite of the Bowen Yang wallet, Fire Island. This is the community coming pitchforks in here. How quickly it can turn. Wait, speaking of Fire Island. We saw Busted there. We saw Busted there. Yeah, Busted. Speaking of Fire Island, I met Big Bro last night.

And it was that reckless part at Sheila at Hollow. Fabulous party. Oh my God. But this lovely gentleman like strikes a conversation with me and I'm like, oh my God, what a sweet guy. And he goes, and I just have to say, I'm big bro. I'm big bro.

I was like, you're kidding me. When was the last time you had contact with Big Bro? Big Bro and I texted a couple weeks ago about meeting up. He is so lovely, by the way. He's the best. Not what I expected. No, I feel like it's odd to me. So wait, can we just level set for everyone who's joined us since the Big Bro of it all? Because a lot of you are new here.

They're basically my new followers. Here's who big bro is. So he's a big part of the Lord. Ariana's coming on the pod soon. Any minute now she's coming in. It's so funny, Michelle. It's just so funny because two weeks ago we have an episode called how the salad gets tossed where we talk about it like at length, like whether or not it's like,

sort of like here nor there to lay a towel down on the bed for anal sex. Then Michelle Obama. Neither here nor there. So this podcast continues to be everything everywhere all at once. Never heard of that. Anyway, we went to Fire Island a few years ago. I was particularly on one. I met someone. He's canonically known on the podcast as Big Bro. Because he called me Lil Bro while I was having sex with him. And I...

I think the vocabulary I used at the time was I shot a load up to heaven that has never come down. Yes. And we've had sex many times since then. It remains a great sort of relationship in my life. I love it. And I still to this day have to say best I ever had. Oh my God. Best thing I ever had.

- And that's okay if you're listening to this or watching this and we've had sex and it's not you, that doesn't mean it wasn't great. He's just the king. - Yeah. Sometimes you got a king. And you also famously kept, you were like, I had sex outside. - By the river. - I had sex by the river. And we were like, there is no river here. What are you talking about? And it took days. And then we realized you meant the bay.

A wide, massive body of water. I was by the water. You look at it. It looked quite like a river to me. Quite like a river to me. I don't necessarily think you have to call things the right thing all the time. Especially not in court. What? Especially not in court. Especially not in court. If I'm not in court, what's the big fucking deal? And even in court, have fun. Have fun in court, y'all. You know what? It was a river.

- Fake news, you said it's the bae. Anyway, you met Big Bro, I'm shook. - That's great. - Kind eyes. - He's great. - 'Cause I always imagined Big Bro as like someone with, you know, vim and vigor. - He has it when it counts. - And now I'm like, oh, it's a toggle, like he switches it on. But otherwise in person and talking- - Brotherly in that way. - Brotherly in that way.

brotherly in that way. He's actually so... He can rib you, but he loves you. It's one of those things where it's like, and I think people out there know, where during sex, it's like one thing, one great, lovely thing. And then afterwards, it's like such a sweet thing. I love that. And you're like, wow, your personality was not what it becomes, but in only the best way. Of course. Sex is fake. Oh, yeah.

And Big Bro is in a committed relationship, so that's where that stays. So, Bowen, you didn't breed Big Bro. I was not Big Bro to Big Bro, but he did say, because now Matt is selling merch that says he goes... Big Bro, Little Bro. Matt owes me a jersey. Yeah, you got to cut him in. Oh, you got to send him one. That's his intellectual property, baby. Yes! He's the one who called you that. We're in court now. Can I say, there's plans for him to wear the jersey next time. Venmo Big Bro. Don't you think that's hot? Venmo Big Bro. Venmo Big Bro.

Should I wear my Lil Bro jersey? By the way, you can still buy big, real Lil Bro jerseys. Happy Brad. JoshShotShot.com for all your Matt Rogers merch needs. I would love if I had a landing page for my merch on your to-do website. A nice collab. We should just link all of our things to everything else. Why don't we just start one big website? Let's start one big website. That would be fun anyway. Let's just do a website together. This is Zoran and Lander endorsing each other. Zoran and Lander cross-endorsing. You're dating the podcast.

- The first time we've talked about something temporal. - Oh Mary, it will be forever. - Should we announce for the tour? - Let's get into it. - This is a bit that I do feel always, I'm like, this is real though. - Can I say, this is literally how every,

other single thing that like we or I have ever had successful it starts as a joke and then it becomes real culture awards started as a joke then one year it's like Bowen you have a slot at Lincoln Center what do you want to do oh I don't know Matt do you want to do culture awards let's do it history was a joke have you heard of Christmas did you entertain for the Lincoln Center

Was there anything else? Nothing else. I was just like, are we going to do anything? No, I think it was like, oh, they gave us this cool opportunity. One man Vanya. Because if you remember, we canceled the cultural awards because they never actually were supposed to happen. We just were doing nominees just because. Oh, right. I think we had to do an episode. We were like, we had nothing to talk about. So we did that. And the bit was, and we're going to cancel this. We're going to say that they're canceled next week. Oh, and that's the episode you had nothing to talk about? The only one? Ah.

Listener. Oh. Listener. I don't even know what they want anymore. So for the tour. Well, they want this. They want the four of us. That's what you said. They've been clamoring. For the tour. Now tell them what that is. Why don't you tell them what that is? Tell them what that is. For the tour. By the way. Trot don't last for always, bitch. Matt and I were reflecting on what a perfect story. What a perfect story. It's a for sale baby shoes never worn. Of...

of that drag race, like World Pride, like 2019, you know. People don't know about Stonewall. They don't know. It's like people don't know about Stonewall. What's up with that? Stonewall was fighting for gay rights and people were killed. Nobody was killed at Stonewall. Nobody was killed?

- Nobody was killed. - Willem, a true comedian. - A true comedian. - A historian. - I just think Derrick Barry and Willem are a comedy duo we don't think we need, but we do. And if they don't think that at least I'm going to their Vegas two-person show. - Well, I mean, yes.

So anyway, speaking of big shows. Can I just say about Willem really quick? Willem. Willem. I had Matt zigging and zagging. It's crazy to try to keep up. Willem we met at maybe track the musical. Maybe track the musical.

- Not drag movies, tell everybody what that is. - She came up, she said hello. She was like, big fan of the movie. I was like, well, I love you, Willem. And she goes, and if you ever need a drag queen in one of your projects, I'm available, and walked away. - And she loves that. - And she said to you, you said, I love you. And she goes, you have good taste. - Oh yeah, that too. I love you, you have good taste. - This is what I said, when I tagged Camila this season on Survivor, I was like, oh my God, she's my queen. She responds to my DM, she goes, thank you for your honesty. I was like, I love that response.

Thank you for your honesty. Thank you for caring. Thank you for caring. For the tour. For the tour. Why don't you tell them what that is? Why don't you tell them what that is? Why don't you tell everybody what that is?

I think... Nobody died before the tour. Nobody died before the tour. Nobody was killed. I think out of the four of us, I think Josh might have the clearest picture. Well, he's on the pitch. He's on the pitch cycle. I'm doing Kelly in the morning. I know how to do this. You're doing Kelly in the morning. Come on. So as you know, one of the centerpieces of Culture Awards is that often the four of us sing a song arranged for our four...

soaring vocal trumpets. Trumpet-like instruments. Four trumpets, each higher than the last. And it's pretty rare that anyone sings alone, really. It's not really desired. It's mostly four voices together in community and fellowship as one. Four in harmony. Exactly. At this

point, our repertoire includes three or even four songs. Right. Imagine if we added another five. That's a concert. So we want to do a show called For the Tour. For the Tour. Four voices, four cities, four nights. Yes. You think four nights in each or four...

That's interesting. I see. I was about to ask whether the pitch was counting down four singers, three, blah, blah, two, or counting up. Imagine we would want to do more than three CDs. Four singers, five.

Five cities. Six cities. Six hours. Don't you guys think it should be four, four, four, four? So four singers, four cities, four nights, four songs. Four songs. If we get on stage and say, let's just get logistical about this. Say it's an hour, hour and a half show. Four shows is a show when you have so much

Like patter and, you know, you know, back and forth. What if it's divisible by four or 40 songs? It's like a mega mix. Yes.

Four singers, four cities, four nights, 40 songs. And they could be medleys, some of them. 14 songs. 14 songs. Like an album. What we promise you is we will try to sing together as four as much as we possibly can. I don't think anyone on stage is alone having a solo ever. Can I even pitch a bit? Even if someone's a lead singer. I would love at one point for you to come out. Maybe you start, have a heart of crystal.

The audience is like, of course, solo number from that. Instantly, the three of us appear. It is a quartet. So just one of the songs is Have You Heard of Christmas? That's an example. I like it because I like those checks, baby. If Anne and I come out to sing one of our huge hits from Dix the Musical, trust, you're in it. Trust. You know? Thank God this time. You know, I'm so thankful this time to be in it. You know what I mean? This time I'll get in it. Come on. That's kind of interesting. That is kind of interesting. Larry Charles has a book coming out.

- Well, that's really interesting swerve. It's a really interesting segue you tried to do there. - He ultimately controls casting. - We should have cast you in the film. - And I put you guys in my special. You guys are always on the podcast. - You're correct. - And I feel like- - No, we always- - We provide. - We provide. - Bell House Improv. - Not for the Improvathon. - And thank you for that.

I'll be honest. Any of those platforms. The check is bigger for Bell House Improv than it was for the film. Probably for the movie. Now, which part do you feel you should have played? Because whatever you say is correct. I honor we should have cast you in the film. Matt would have been...

One of the neighbors, probably. I would have been great as one of the neighbors. And you know it's true. Maybe when Darcy peeks her head out and goes, the fuck? You're with her in a nightclub. I could have said, babe, get the fuck back in here. Think about how fun that would have been. Baby, why are you in the hall always? If Darcy came out, the fuck? And I come...

Get the fuck back in here. And you go, baby, they're gay guys. They fuck loud, baby. Get back in here. Get back in here. Why are you always in the hallway, baby? You had an opportunity for the movie to be funny in that hallway. You squandered that. You squandered it. We squandered that. We squandered that. You guys, I'm kidding.

but I will have my revenge. - Do you think Darcy's character is homophobic in that? - Yes. - Do you think she's defucking like gay sex? - Gay, yes. - Gay guy, she's like, "I don't like that." - I don't think she knows their identical twin brothers having sex. - But if she did, it would make things even worse. - 'Cause do they fuck, do the boys fuck when they moved, the same day they moved in? - Yes. - There's still boxes everywhere.

that we fuck into. And, and everyone, all the props people, I wasn't props people, whoever it was, I'm not throwing anyone at the bus, kept writing like jokes on the boxes, like dildos, porn. And Larry was like, this isn't funny. Why do I think that's funny? And then we were like, it should say fragile. Yes, that's funny. Fragile. And they fuck into the boxes that say fragile. That's the joke. That's funny. If you fuck into a box that says dildos, what is the joke? And we're like,

And why would they have dildos? This is like the last day of shooting. Absolutely. I could say fragile. Yes, that's a joke. You should have been neighbor two to Darcy's neighbor one. It's okay. Guys, it's in the past. Did we say this last time we were here that Nick Offerman, who plays one of the protesters, at one point while improvising, he said his name, like always when everybody was like celebrating, he'd turn to his neighbor and be like, the name's Bill Smith, by the way. Steve Chaney.

And I remember at a break, we went up to him. We're like, well, this is great. The character has a name. You're Steve Chaney. And he thought, and he went, although protester number three does have a nice ring. Cause I think he likes that his IMDB says protester number three. What a legend he is. Truly.

Reckon you know the Brits? Tea, the Queen, saying things weird, bottle of water. Babes, did you know they make unbelievably good TV? Just hits different. The subtle shade disguises polite conversation. Cutest little villages, where three people die a week. It's giving unhinged, but cosy. And it's all on BritBox.

Sing it differently and start streaming the best of British TV with BritBox. Use promo code CULTURISTAS to get 50% off your first month when you sign up at BritBox.com. Terms and conditions apply. Summer is quickly approaching and there's no better time to make sure you're feeling your best.

Keep your gut health in check with the help of HealthAid Kombucha. It's powered with probiotics, which helps you feel less bloated. Plus, it's made with real fruit juice, so it's deliciously refreshing. With so many delicious flavors like Pink Lady Apple, Passion Fruit Tangerine, and Pomegranate Blueberry, it's the perfect bubbly beverage to enjoy as the weather heats up.

Look for the brown bottle with an anchor on it at a store near you. The Temptations brand, America's number one cat treat brand, is on a mission to show the world just how irresistible cat dads truly are and make 2025 the year of the cat dad. Cat dads have long been misunderstood, keeping them understated,

the radar. However, the Temptations brand knows that being a cat dad is a green flag, and they are some of the most irresistible, sensitive, and compassionate men of all. Cats aren't the only ones who find cat dads irresistible. In fact, two out of three Gen Z adults believe that cat dads make better bows. From athletes to musicians to gamers and scholars and everyone in between, Temptations brand knows that proud cat dads are living amongst us, and it's time they get their moment in the spotlight. A recent study found that 63% of Americans are

agree that men who own cats have been unfairly stereotyped by society and cat dads are most likely to associate positive attributes like compassionate, sensitive, in touch with their emotions with men who own cats. The Temptations brand knows there's nothing like the bond between a cat dad and their cat and the brand's variety of irresistible treats make cat dads even more irresistible.

Okay, wait.

I have to say, I had a home essential that I needed, Bowen, and I went to wafer.com and I got it. It is a vacuum cleaner. They had it. I got what I needed. Oh, of course they have it. It's not an off chance at all. It's an on chance, especially when it comes to everything in the home and outdoor. I bought some new outdoor pillows and an espresso sheen. Don't worry, that's indoors.

Wayfair's got everything you need to level up your outdoor space. They have patio sets and lounge chairs, outdoor bars and hot tubs, fire pits, gazebos, and of course, string lights. It's so easy to have a one-stop shop where you can make over your entire space with a resort feel without that resort price tag. And you can clean all your stuff, okay? Because like I said, I'm...

Letting loose with this vacuum cleaner. Yeah, it's a mealy. Okay, if you know, you know, they're good. There's something for every style in every home, no matter your space or budget. Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your summer home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget, including the outdoors. No more huge delivery fees for patio furniture. Get big stuff like patio sets, gazebos, hot tubs, outdoor dining sets, and more shipped free.

Don't wait. Make your outdoor space your dream oasis today with Wayfair and enjoy it all summer long. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop a huge outdoor selection. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair. Every style. Every home. Did you guys watch Parker Posey and Lisa Kudrow's Actors on Actors? Yes. They bring up Megan Mullally. Oh!

Well, okay. I watched the first like 15, 20 minutes of it. And then I was with some people who were like, I can't follow them. And I was just like, it's Lisa and Parker. Like, it's not going to be just like more like non sequiturs levels. Like try list.

- I'm not listening to this podcast. - That's unfathomable. - They won't. - They won't try that. - But I was like, I was thinking to myself, like, what do you, why would you want them to be, this is melodic watching the two of them be themselves at each other like this. I loved it. - Two trumpets. - But people were mouthy about, some gays were very angsty and mouthy about that interview. - I have a question that I want us to decide on on air. 'Cause if it's four cities, what are the cities?

New York, LA, Chicago, and of course, Orlando, Florida. Oh, that's huge. Interesting. Interesting. Because then it pays for a trip. New York. You have to think like me. Can I tell you something? You have to think like me. And we have to close the tour there so we can hang after. If you don't think like me, you might not go to Orlando.

Oh. That's true. I might not. I'm also looking at the crew. If you don't start thinking like me, you're never going to get to Orlando. Beautiful place. You might never get there. They all pack up the cameras and leave. They understand. They're laughing right now, but it'll hit them later that they should really think about it. It's not a really good show. And just so you know, you can't hear it, but the crew's been laughing so much this whole episode. I'm clocking when they're laughing. Can I tell you something? They don't love the dirty stuff.

It scares them. It's pride, you guys. Well, I certainly don't see you in your pride outfits. Can I get everyone to say Kevin Spacey was robbed? Can I say who's okay? You are okay because you voted. I am okay because it's a fun shirt. You, it's pride. It's turnstile. You claim it's gay hard rock music. You, cheetah print. Makes me think of Lisa Rinna. You're good. The two on the crew, I don't know. Didn't cut it.

- It's giving, what would you call this? - That's a good shirt. - Converse. - Yeah, it's good. - Chucks. - Bold and the Rap. - Some fun ones. - He did say we have mutual friends and one of them was Patty Harrison. So you're okay with me. - So respect. - And Sachi Ezra. - Sachi, we love Sachi. - Of course. - So he's okay with me. Everyone here is okay.

Okay. Now bring him in from outside. We're going to go one by one. Bringing civilians off the road. We're actually around a really good dog today. Maggie. Maggie the dog. Maggie has a dog's name is a little bit of a trigger for me because one of my dogs was Maggie. Do you find it you like it or you make you too sad? It makes me remember her. She actually was the best. That's kind of nice.

She died. She died. She didn't make it past 10, actually. I'm telling you about some of these dogs. Now, tell Maggie to cover her ears out there. But they're inbred. They're inbred. Aaron, I do want to ask you a vulnerable question. Yeah. And look at you smiling to try to put up a front, put up a disguise. Do you foresee you and Michael wanting to have another dog? Because I had a dog who was dead. Lady. Named Lady. Lady.

- I think so, but I think in a while. I wanna be rich enough to pay for a dog walker. - Yes, a huge clutch. - And when you wanna go out of town, be able to drop it somewhere nice. - Well, let's set the ticket price before the tour. - But also, should we have a string section? Like we should have an orchestra. We should have a string section. - Four strings? - Four strings. Four of every instrument. Four drummers, four guitarists, four keyboards, four strings.

I thought the strings were like the four strings on most string instruments.

- Yes. - But there's so many ways to go about this. Here's how to fill out the show. Four group songs. - Four solos. - But with backup. - You don't wanna? - But four solos, I can't tell if that's too much or if we just each do a solo and that's eight songs. - Can I actually literally tell you what we'll have time for as someone who's done a show with music? It has to be four.

- And only four. - I'm telling you four songs. Because we're gonna be talking so much. We're not gonna be able to stop talking, you guys. - What if we make the show- - No, listen to me, please. - I'm trying, I'm trying. - 'Cause if you think more like me, you won't have problems. - I won't? - No.

and they're each themed to a season or they're each themed to one of us. - Or an element. - Or a cardinal direction. - Wait a minute. - This is all good. - What are our avatar elements? - Do we all have different signs? - No, we're both water. - And you're air and I'm earth. - So then you're earth, you're air. I think Matt, even though he's a water sign,

has fire quality totally do you know you're rising or you're i'm water water water i'm probably the most water that's the most fire you can do i don't have any water i think bowen is and i'll say this just you guys confused because i'm wearing a yellow and red shirt well you're tina burner i've seen it because i'm dressed like a thousand times because i'm dressed like um tina burner bc

Before Colors. Before New Colors. BNC. Before New Colors. Tina Burner BNC. Tina, use that. You can use that, Tina. Tina, it's yours. Robbed. I could be Fire. I just think you're the fiery one. What else is in your chart?

I think I'm water, air, air. I'm air, air, water, I think. Or air, water, water, but I think I'm double air, water. What are you? I don't remember. Aquarius. I don't remember. I think you have earth. I'd have to look it up. And what are you? Earth. Earth, Taurus. Earth. Gemini, moon, air, and then Aries, rising fire.

Okay. Yeah, so you know water. That's why I smile when I'm because I had my emotions are not accessible to me Yeah, I don't believe that for a second. I'm an actress. Yeah, you're getting quieter. Here's what happened Here's something that I have umbridge with okay professor JK Rowling read Yes, every time we say something like that it is of course an endorsement doors we were in Fire Island and

these three and someone named matt whittaker oh and then they all come up to me they say we found out what little women we are oh yeah we did we did they say matt whittaker's joe matt rogers is amy bowen's beth and you're meg and i go i'm meg and they go because you're the actress and she lost her mind i go you two are booking acting work every day of your lives i am a published novelist you're right

Incensed erased my whole identity no actor anyway, at least you got assigned one of the women well you are Which I saw

I don't know why I'm doing it in this school. And that girl is good. The girl is really bad. It's not really bad. When you take a chance on me, I like it. Doesn't that just, that earworm give you Louisa May Alcott? I am astonished.

- I will say, I do think Astonishing blows ass. - It's so bad. - People just think it's good because there is a big note in it. - 'Cause Sutton is belting. - But the Scansion is wrong. - Astonishing is wrong. - Scansion is wrong. - And don't forget we're Stansion Kings. - But Amy was played by the same actress young and old and everyone was gagged for Florence Pugh and I was like, they did it on Broadway in 2002.

Get this girl her flowers! I did. Okay. Can I, I'm going to bravely say my take about the Florence Pugh performance as an adult, as the like older version. Yeah. Bring Kirsten Dunst back. I think it, I think it should be two people. CGI Kirsten back into it. Kirsten was perfect. Woo. And she burned that book.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, Kirsten is perfect in everything. It's true. And Winona was a great job. I love Winona. And you know what else? What else? Winona is like a perfect blueprint for is Abigail Williams. She's so good in the movie. And you'll be seeing John Proctor as the villain today. I'm so excited. With Joan Allen as Elizabeth.

- Joan Allen. - Joan Allen. - As Elizabeth Oscar nomination. - Come on. - Did you know that? - Yeah, and for Ice Storm too. - Ice Storm too. - In Ice Storm she was, you have some marker. You have some marker on her keys and you're gonna find her keys. - Yeah. - She's so good. - She's got one for a movie called The Contender too. - Oh right, which I've never seen. - Yeah, so Joan Allen is-- - I love Joan Allen. - I saw her in a middling play, not her fault, and not the playwright's fault, and no one's fault.

- Your fault, maybe. - Maybe my fault. - Perhaps your fault. - I was on the front row and she's just crying real tears. - Joan Allen? - Yeah, God bless you, honey, in this fine play. Giving it all you got. - Love Joan Allen. - Love her. Eight shows a week of their crying for me. - Wet woman. - A wet woman.

Everyone making joke about Jonathan Groff being wet. Well, he calls himself wet a lot. It's a clip he did. Because he spit. He spit. Yeah, and they were asking him a question. I'm a spitter too, not like that. He's like, I get very wet. That is the way he's chosen to. And Daniel Radcliffe was asking, he was like, say that another way. He was like, I'm wet. He was like, hear yourself, say it another way. Daniel Radcliffe, please read Harry Potter. Please read Harry Potter. Please read all the books. If you haven't yet, then read. They are a really enchanting story. I don't...

Have we ever talked about Hogwarts Legacy? I never played. See, like, there is such an internal debate among gay gamers. About whether or not we can play it. But it's like, it's tough. Like, I don't know where to land on this because like, the developers have taken a stance where you can make a trans character. Right.

And they're clearly like, hey, we don't fuck with JK. I don't think anyone cares except JK. Like, that's the thing is, I don't think anyone in that ecosystem is like, fuck trans people except JK Rowling herself. But then it's her shit. It's her whole... She's getting attacked. Correct. But like... But... Hey.

When Kevin Spacey's in O'Mary, you'll understand. Art and artists. That is when everything swings all the way back. I know. Are people mad about the HBO show? People are up in arms if everyone says yeah. I think it is worth being up in arms about that for many reasons. And you know what I can't get over is how ruined those kids already are. Like I was talking to someone who knows and they were like, yeah, like it's going to be probably...

before the announcement of their casting, like starting therapy about really making them understand what exactly they've signed up for and that their lives will be forever changed. And like, you know, media training for them, the parents, like, like, like real, real conditioning. They did that for us before Harold Knight. They did. Thank God. Orna came in. Orna came in and did that. Orna came into office that got on Harold Knight.

Like, is it a good thing to book Harry Potter? Probably not. No. Well, Daniel's okay. But I mean, you're saying now. Yeah, but by the skin of his teeth, he's okay. In a way that's remarkable when someone comes out of that experience. Yeah. I guess, like, it's just... Are they all English again? Yeah. I legit think that helps because they're all like, do the work, darling. Yeah. Wait, what do you mean again? Like, they're all English in the movies. Yeah. Oh, which we love. Yeah. I think it's... I think the English are a little more like...

This isn't real doll. Like we're like in LA, it's like do coke little girl. Like, yeah, I think it's a little more like, you know, let's do Matilda together. Yeah. I think fuck the show. I don't think. I don't think. Anyway. So the traders, the traders, the traders, but I'm excited for the traders.

I mean, a lot of people upset about Michael Rapaport. Right. But, you know, whatever. The trash takes itself out every time. But what do you think about how they did with the Survivors? I think the Survivors three are great. They kicked ass with that. I think they're great. They probably got Rob Sestranino because Survivor didn't work out. And Natalie. And Natalie? People were saying she was maybe rumored for 50. Oh, wow. I like Natalie a lot. Me too. Love. Who's the third one?

- Oh, Jam Jam. - Yeah, of course, Icon. - And then this guy, Ian Terry, a great big brother.

And the Housewives they've chosen are good too. This is what I get. But they make the same mistake that they've made for the past three seasons, four seasons now. One Drag Race contestant. I know. Just give us two. Just give us two. I had heard a rumor that Jujubee was supposed to be on the Traitors. Juju would be amazing. That's what I had heard. Because I think that they were trying to take the note of not just one Drag Race person. And who is on it? Moody Exchange. Well, that's good. Yeah. Well, that I like.

Well, that I like. I'm interested to see what allyships happen. I do think it's like on paper, it's my favorite people. And I think...

I know the most of these people. Yeah. Because sometimes I don't know the big brother people. It feels like we really went away from the challenge. Yeah. We really did. Sure, sure. I wonder if that was a note or something. Oh my God, did you see Natalie's cry on or whatever it's called? Lower third. Lower third, what does it say? Amazing race. Which she was on first, but it is so funny. Oh, interesting. She's a survivor winner. She won survivor and then got on the finals of another survivor. She's amazing. Well, you know what? Maybe she's pissed off.

At Survivor. Yeah, I mean, maybe. I think it was maybe just NBC trying to be like, we diversified our profile. I don't know. She was on it first. She was on Amazing. There's definitely some type of war between the traitors and Survivor. Which I probably say it's the traitors. Yeah. Which you should. They like steal all his people. But also it's like, well. They don't steal the people. They just give them a chance. It's just Jeff. He's. Yeah. He needs that. Moratorium on Jeff, maybe. I hate to say it.

Not moratorium. What does that mean? Death. Yeah. No, no, no. That's not what that means. It means like, let's do like a discussion post-mortem. I think it would be worth it to have a- Moratorium is pause. I'm confusing that with post-mortem. Yes, yes. Moratorium is what you say when one of your friends is being too gay. Yeah, moratorium on Josh. Moratorium on all that. Oh, great drag name. Mora.

Moratorium. Wait, I'm still so pissed. I wanted to stay on my Criterion closet. My drag name would be Janice Films.

That's really good. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's really good. Did you guys hear my new drag name? No. Beautiful Dress. Oh, mine has always been for a long time, Pretty Girl. And you go, hi, I'm pretty. I heard a great one in Fire Island at the little wear a wig at tea contest. Some gay guy, who I'm crediting, some gay guy said Donatella verse top me. And I'd never heard that. Wow, that's really good. Donatella verse top me.

So if you're that gay guy. Verse top me. Verse top me, daddy. It's perfect as a verb. Verse top me. Mrs. Verse top me. That's what Rue would call it. So how was it last night? I got verse topped. It was really good. He taught me but reminded me he could bottom the whole time. You should verse top me. I can bottom anytime. I can bottom anytime. I top more frequently, but I like to bottom as well. I like to bottom. I like to bottom. Oh!

For verse topping to be the full Jaron does really funny. He was verse topping me. He's verse topping me. He's verse topping me. You know what I mean? Yeah, I was gonna say Jaron. Versing topping. Versing topping. Versing top. No, it's better verse topping. Let's just say what we all want to say. Finally, I got my verse on top. That's good. Yeah, verse on top. Weird Al. Tops, verse bottoms. We have to stop saying up as three different things and we have to start

War tops verse. Oh Wow We settle this in the streets and I think the bottoms are gonna win you think they will they have something to prove you think so? Well, they have skills wait tops have skills No, they don't know they don't being what else no, that's no already. No verbal verbal. No Topps have no skills. Okay, so you bottom skills are everything taking dick

Everything. Think of the bottoms. They're artists. They're painters. They're sculptors. They're intelligent. They're painters. They're sculptors. They're your mother. They're your daughter. Fuck your mother. Tops are nothing. Tops are nothing. Tops are nothing. And they bring nothing.

Reckon you know the Brits? Tea, the Queen, saying things weird, bottle of water. Babes, did you know they make unbelievably good TV? Just hits different. The subtle shade disguises polite conversation. Cutest little villages, where three people die a week. It's giving unhinged, but cosy. And it's all on BritBox.

See it differently and start streaming the best of British TV with BritBox. Use promo code CULTURISTAS to get 50% off your first month when you sign up at BritBox.com. Terms and conditions apply. Summer is quickly approaching and there's no better time to make sure you're feeling your best.

Keep your gut health in check with the help of HealthAid Kombucha. It's powered with probiotics, which helps you feel less bloated. Plus, it's made with real fruit juice, so it's deliciously refreshing. With so many delicious flavors like Pink Lady Apple, Passion Fruit Tangerine, and Pomegranate Blueberry, it's the perfect bubbly beverage to enjoy as the weather heats up.

Look for the brown bottle with an anchor on it at a store near you. The Temptations brand, America's number one cat treat brand, is on a mission to show the world just how irresistible cat dads truly are and make 2025 the year of the cat dad. Cat dads have long been misunderstood, keeping them undervalued.

the radar. However, the Temptations brand knows that being a cat dad is a green flag, and they are some of the most irresistible, sensitive, and compassionate men of all. Cats aren't the only ones who find cat dads irresistible. In fact, two out of three Gen Z adults believe that cat dads make better bows. From athletes to musicians to gamers and scholars and everyone in between, Temptations brand knows that proud cat dads are living amongst us, and it's time they get their moment in the spotlight. A recent study found that 63% of Americans are

Agree that men who own cats have been unfairly stereotyped by society and cat dads are most likely to associate positive attributes like compassionate, sensitive, in touch with their emotions with men who own cats. The Temptations brand knows there's nothing like the bond between a cat dad and their cat and the brand's variety of irresistible treats make cat dads even more irresistible to their feline friends. Temptations cat treats are so irresistible that it makes it easy for cat dads to build a lasting bond with their cats and the perfect

Okay, wait. I have to say...

I had a home essential that I needed, Bowen, and I went to Wayfair.com and I got it. It is a vacuum cleaner. They had it. I got what I needed. Oh, of course they have it. It's not an off chance at all. It's an on chance, especially when it comes to everything in the home and outdoor. I bought some new outdoor pillows and an espresso sheen. Don't worry, that's indoors.

Wayfair's got everything you need to level up your outdoor space. They have patio sets and lounge chairs, outdoor bars and hot tubs, fire pits, gazebos, and of course, string lights. It's so easy to have a one-stop shop where you can make over your entire space with a resort feel without that resort price tag. And you can clean all your stuff, okay? Because like I said, I'm...

Letting loose with this vacuum cleaner. Yeah, it's a mealy. Okay, if you know, you know, they're good. There's something for every style in every home, no matter your space or budget. Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your summer home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget, including the outdoors. No more huge delivery fees for patio furniture. Get big stuff like patio sets, gazebos, hot tubs, outdoor dining sets, and more shipped free.

Don't wait. Make your outdoor space your dream oasis today with Wayfair and enjoy it all summer long. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop a huge outdoor selection. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair. Every style. Every home.

I really want to go to Twinks vs. Dolls this year. Me too, but it's always like... It's so packed. It's packed and there's no air conditioning. You're allowed to smoke cigarettes. You're in a war-torn... I always see the videos and I'm like, thank God. Because one of the events is like, who can smoke a cigarette the fastest? I celebrate. As I recently walked into a house party and went, I stepped through the door and said, I'm too old. That's amazing. I'm getting old.

I'm getting there. - I love the youth and I love to be the old weird grandmother with the youth, but sometimes you just walk in and you're like, "I'm too old." - Oh, of course. - And that is simply, I went with like air conditioning in the event, in the middle of Pride. - Yes, yes, yes. - Not because of the twinks and the dolls fighting, I would love to watch that at my age or any age. - There was actually a time like not long ago where I was sort of talking about like how, oh, I was talking to someone, but then I realized they were 22 and I just couldn't talk to them anymore.

And I realized I was talking to a bunch of 24 year olds. - Right. - And I was just like, got it. - Where is the line? - And I realized I'm old and weird. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - And it's brave to be both. - It's brave to be both. - Old versus weird. - Yeah. - Old versus weird. - Old versus weird. - That's gonna be a crazy war.

I miss cool shit, weird shit. Me too. An era. An era. An era. Tell us about Ta-Da. Why don't you tell us what that is? What should I tell us about Ta-Da? I'd love to. So I'll be telling some of my jokes and my stories. Yes. In the narrative stand-up kind of way. And yet, I'll be doing a 2,000 slide PowerPoint where I'm powering it and I've memorized all the cues. So we're sort of juggling that tightrope walk while we give you the laughs and pathos that is the off-Broadway stand-up experience.

When, what will it feel like, you know, when you, you know, hopefully this is in decades from now when you close the show, but what will it feel like to release those cues that have been sort of swimming in your brain? How is he to know? How is he to know how that will feel? Yeah, it's not the future yet. I know. When the show ends, I'm going to make them open source, copyright free. Everyone can own it. Everyone can do with them what they want. I love that. So how are you going to make it funny? Yeah.

You got to make Ru laugh. You got to make me laugh. What a crazy thing to say to me. Make me laugh. Bowen Connection is the person who's designed because there's a lot of text in the show. We got a custom font made by Mr. Teddy Blanks who did the title cards for Wicked. And Barbie. And Nosferatu. Wow. And he made me a font that I'll be using. Can I say something about people who make typefaces, fonts, and also who like...

graphic design and brand shit at the highest caliber. Is it appropriate to say? They felt different once too. They felt different once too. They felt different once too. No, they're like, they're just like comedy nerds. Emily Oberman at Pentagon and Teddy. Teddy did O'Mary as well. Like these people just, Kate, Kate Berlant show. Like these people just love a comedy show. Like Emily Oberman, like designed every SNL logo since the nineties, designed the 30 rock logo for the show, designed like everything.

It just designs everything. What comedy were you into when you were little? Can we say it? And she's working on culture awards. I was about to say. You can cut it.

Nah, I don't know. She doesn't care. I love that. I don't care either. I don't know of her work. She does. No, but Pentagon is slay Pentagon. Like when I was working in graphic design, everyone was like, well, that's Emily Oberman. That's Pentagon. Yeah. And you're learning. And I'm like, and I'm it's in that. I wish I had a better eye for that, but I'm glad other people do. There you go. One time I was in a musical and I was playing a role and usually like the roles don't dance a

And I was with another role and we were standing in the back and I was like, I wish I could dance. And then he goes to me, but then we wouldn't get to watch. Wow. That's gorgeous. Oh, I love to watch. I love to watch. Can I just say, that's how I feel when y'all talk about the traders. Really? You go, wouldn't you like to know more about the traders? But then I wouldn't get to watch.

You know what I mean? You can always watch the show and then participate in the conversation. No, no, no. You'll pop in and out. No, no, no. No, but why...

I ask with no judgment, but only curiosity. Why haven't you like been like, let me, let me try. My truth is I find it to be boring. I love that. My sisters love it. I think it's a day for your honesty. I feel neutral on the show and thus I don't really watch, but I can watch with my girls and be disconnected from the season and have fun watching. The challenges literally do not matter. So that is like a huge flaw.

Yes, of course. And also, half of the episode could be cut and it wouldn't matter in the slightest. I know this isn't a requisite aspect of the show, but I also don't watch like any of the franchises they draw from. So I also don't really care about these people. That's what I meant. I meant like even the survivors and for both of you, and this is purely, this is not

housewives and all these things. Like, I feel like you, there is, there is a, let me say alternate timeline where you guys are obsessed with these. Well, let me say if traders was drawing from love on the spectrum, couples therapy and bake off, I'd be watching. They should be bake off couples therapy and love on the spectrum. Then I'm,

watching you know I'm watching I usually only like reality TV when it's a contest that's my problem with housewives I find it tedious when no one gets eliminated see I think your issue is you're not watching housewives like it's a contest totally at the end of the season the winner is to be honest when I see the reunion at the end and you see where they're all sitting it's almost like those are their final seeds totally

and then people don't come back but I like the like next season all new people playing the game again versus like and now that you know I don't care I love it I love to watch it with people while they tell me what I am watching me too Aaron's introduced me to all the peak survivor seasons I've had an amazing time yeah

I often watch Housewives when I'm on a jet blue flight. I have an amazing time. So I get why my sisters like them, even if they're not the shows that are for me. They're not the culture that made me say culture is for me. What is something that your lover was into that as a result of them just sort of being so into it that now you're into it? Oh, yeah. Because you both have a long,

- Long time partners. And I would imagine you at least picked up something from them and weren't just so into your own thing. And just only ever thinking about what you want to do and acting like a narcissist. That I think at some point there must have been something. - Yeah. - I'm so sorry. Would you say that back? I was not listening. I was thinking about myself.

Just say that all again. I was thinking about myself. I just hope that there was at least one time where you were like, hey, that's interesting. Something someone else was doing, saying, being involved in. What was that? Do I have to be into it now myself or can I just enjoy it? Well, ideally, Aaron, ideally it was something that was interesting enough that your partner was into that you wanted to stick with it. There's a meme that Michael and I trade. It's two kittens and one sort of has his or hers little hands out.

And it goes, me listening to my partner's interests. That's so sweet. That's really cute. Because Michael likes to just sort of like...

often stand because he's a mover around whereas I'm sort of, I'm always like draped across furniture and he's, he will just stand and tell me about something that I have no, that I could never do or understand. And I'm simply the cat. And so while you're like that, like the cat, are you remembering what he's saying? I remember some stuff, but you know, sometimes he gets granular. He's telling me about like sewing patterns and things and I'm like, I'll never understand this.

So that's not one of the things I'm asking about. Something that he... Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's something he loves you now love because you knew him? I'm trying to think of a singing artist he got me into, but that would be like back in college because now we're so enmeshed. Well, what about his penis and anus? He got me into those, honey.

Couldn't get you out. Couldn't get me out. You got stuck famously. Whoa. Had to hightail it down to the hospital. There is this like sub genre of erotica.

Like, you know, fiction. That he got you into? No. I sadly got myself into this. But I don't even like this genre, but I have read it. It's like the top is really stupid. Like very, very dumb. How novel. Likely story. This is every porn. He keeps accidentally like, whoa, like getting stuck.

In the bottom or the cocksucker. Oh, whoa, whoa, dude. I can't get out. I don't know how. In their body or in things? Like in their mouth or hole. Like, whoa, I can't get it out. Whoa. And is the bottom sort of like, ugh? I feel like it is usually told from the bottom's POV. And you're here, yeah, yeah. It's more like, my roommate was so hung.

Thirst person. Wait, so, sorry. I guess it's almost got you into this. No, Michael. Your husband, Michael, I'm in. Just to confirm, we did not

Find a thing. We didn't find a thing. I think of something. What about you? I don't want to give her more airtime, but Blake did get me into Harry Potter because I had not read and he was so into it. Let's give her more airtime. No, fuck her. Yeah, fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck the show. Yeah. I actually, my real take is I don't want to watch that show. I think fuck her. Who the fuck is going to watch that show? Just to make clear. Especially because we already fucking know it. We don't need the show. We already have the movies. You already have the books. What's done is done. It's HBO Max.

needing, they are desperate always for another game. Of course. But yeah, he did get me into that. And then there's more, like you saying, not culture, but temperament things. He slows me down in ways that I appreciate. That's wonderful. I want to do something. I want each of us to go around and for each of the other three people say a thing that the person got them into. Oh, I love this. Okay, this is really good. Wait, okay. I want to get this right. I think it's

Both of you for me it would be music I can think of like specific specific music you've got and I would say for Aaron you Reinforcing like the survivor thing for me because yeah I feel like it might also guy Brown and he's talked about it a lot And I was just like once I realized that like gays like we're having fun talking about it like you you you really have Matt Rogers

broaden my pop music knowledge in a way that I appreciate. 'Cause I even like pop, but I listen to a lot of other things and you've like gotten me into some girls I wouldn't have gotten into. - Really? - Yeah. - Uh-huh. - Okay. - You, 'cause it came up earlier, you did get me into couples therapy. - Which, and he got me into couples therapy. - Oh, I didn't know that came from you. I love this. - Blood down. - There's other things.

I feel like earlier in our relationship, you helped me fill in some of the gaps of like canonical, this is to Aaron Jackson, canonical, you know, old school Hollywood queer film. Because I'd seen a lot of the top line, but it's like, I had only seen like three Betty Davis movies before I met Aaron. And then over 60 or something, I think. Yes. And then I think you definitely got me into Persona 5 and then probably other video games. It's most, I'm a video game guy. I'm that too. I will say weirdly,

weirdly, but like Jesus Christ Superstar, I never, the first time I saw it was the live version at your house. - Yes, oh my God, that was so fun. - That was fun. A bunch of music for you, bunch of TV, but mostly TV for you.

There you go. Probably like reality comes from me to you. Yes, yes. But it is transferred in this direction too. Sometimes Aaron reinforces what Matt tells me about. You know what's interesting is it's like it's funny to like have that question and then us like have to answer it about you guys because it's not to be like...

twee or earnest but truly is like comedy at large like in being yourself on stage like so that's like actually true and real I remember when you guys like were inviting us to hang out with you guys it was like whoa because you guys were the people that we looked up to so I guess that's the answer if we're to be truly honest I didn't mean to do that but it is true at the duplex yeah

No. Wait, and for the tour, will you do that? No, that is actually traumatic. Will you do Bang Bang? I'll do Bang Bang. That's your solo number? Can I tell you something? Whenever I'm suggesting solo numbers, you're going to think it's like, oh, so Matt can do his bullshit. No, it's so Bowen can sing Bang Bang. Oh, I know.

And I like to give them some of the lorg and we gave them Barracuda. Yeah. Bang Bang is a signature piece that needs to come back. I literally think of you when I, no matter who sings that, Nancy Sinatra or whatever. I'm like, no, he does it better. He does it better than Gaga. No, I'm doing a Gaga impression when I sang. Well, and you've made it your own. Stephanie would agree. It's the best performance of the song I've seen. Can I say something? I,

I'm reading Jeff Hiller's memoir right now. Delightful. Plug. He brings up this moment of like him being the, you know, like only gay guy at UCB. Right. And how much he was like, you know, referencing Wicked on Herald Night and the coach being like, that's too niche. Don't make references like that. You know what I mean? I love that. And then through like seeing us do twins and then all of this, he was like, I sort of learned from my daughters to be myself. Oh, Jeff.

I feel that in a big way too. Like when you're saying like, oh, you taught. I'm like, yeah, but then when y'all were doing what you were doing, it allowed me to be like, oh shit, there's parts of myself I'm not accessing and not leaning into. It's all cyclical. You know what I mean? We're your younger cousin. It's intergenerational. Yeah, exactly. It's not daughters. Kissing cousins. Kissing cousins. And also this is all to say Jeff is mother and everyone needs to put respect on Jeff Hiller. Oh God. Jeff Hiller. The moment. By his book. By.

And watch the show. I love the show. That is interesting. It's a more holistic thing because I'm sitting here being like, but what is it? It's hard to pinpoint because it's just been everything. I love that. I love that it's everything. We should write a Broadway show. All of us?

It's for the tour. For the tour. It's about... I think it goes to Broadway. Do you think getting... No, it's not in Four Cities. It's on Broadway. It's on Broadway. That's one of the Four Cities. Four Cities. Broadway. Broadway. Hollywood. West End. West End. Disney. Tokyo. Disney Tokyo. I want to do one of the little amphitheaters in the park. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like as one of the... Like a gazebo by... Muppet Vision. That theater's free. Muppet Vision. We could do it in Muppet Vision. Not for long. What are they putting in?

So the Muppet section in Hollywood Studios is going down so that Monsters, Inc. can be built. Oh, good. I love Monsters, Inc. No, sorry. The Muppets are now going to Rock and Roller Coaster. Okay. So it's sort of as is written, so it shall be done. Aerosmith bequeaths to the Muppets who bequeath to Monsters, Inc. Oh, so Rock and Roller Coaster is not going to be about Aerosmith anymore. It's going to be about Kermit. It will be Rock and Roller Coaster starring the Muppets. Okay. Which I think is kind of...

Fierce. They make music. I always thought... I love the ride, Rockin' Roller Coaster, but I did think an Aerosmith ride was a little... At Disney? Yeah, a little strange. It needs to...

10 years ago. Whereas the Muppets are a big family band working together. Matt had a theory that Rockin' Rollercoaster was going to go to Olivia Rodrigo. I was told that in a real way. And it was someone who claimed that they knew. It was like, well, you know, they're changing the theming of Rockin' Rollercoaster from Aerosmith to Olivia Rodrigo. And in fact,

I kind of understand it on like an I'm gay level, but does that work on a world level? On a world level, like in five years, this woman is going to look completely different. None of it will be visually right. Wait, who is it? It should be the Goofy Movie Band. Oh, Powerline. Powerline, yeah, thank you. Wait, is it Tom Nye and Charlton who have the, they have a bit that...

they want Disney to be, they want the characters to be controlled like by each character has a president. So like Mickey has a president, Goofy has a president or, you know, of the, of the, is there like main PR person and they're like working around, like, so they control everything, like putting Donald in a movie, getting Donald a ride, collabing with another character. Yeah.

It's just really funny. So it's like a publicist war between the Muppets? And it called them the Big Six. And who do you think the Big Six Disney characters are? I love that. Well, it's Mickey. It's Minnie. But they probably share a publicist. No. You don't think so? You don't think? Okay, we're giving her autonomy and her autonomy is to choose. Everything is just the girl version of Mickey. If I'm her publicist, I'm fucking getting on the phone. Mickey Goofy Donald because they're all in Kingdom Hearts. There you go.

This is just a bad publicist if she's just getting her the girl version of Mickey. I'm just saying, if you're to tell me that Mickey and Minnie have a different publicist, I think Minnie's publicist fucking sucks. Well, no. She needs one. You think Carrie Coon and Tracy Letts have the same publicist?

They do different things. I think Tracy Letts says no to a lot more than Carrie Coon. Because they have different publicists. Because they have different publicists. Yeah. I don't know that they do. I actually would. You know what? I bet Tracy Letts is like, doesn't even really use his publicist. He's a writer. And so is Mickey. Mickey's a writer. Minnie's a star.

- I don't think that that's true. - We haven't really seen Mickey out there that much. - Mickey's not out there that much either. - Shy guy. - He's a writer. - This is what I'm gonna say. - He's the Tracy Letts. Mickey is Tracy Letts. - I really think Mickey and Minnie have the same publicist. - Wow. - Just like I think Donald and Daisy, no, you know what? Daisy has a different publicist. - That's what we're saying. - Because you can talk.

- You can talk about Daisy and what she's up to and what she's into, but you can't say that about Minnie. - No, but Donald, I fear Donald has Scientologist vibes because Daisy is not showing up anywhere. It's Shelly Miscavige vibes. - What are you talking about? You know exactly where she is. She's in that room at the Disney World ride where she teaches us ballet. - But in media, we don't see her. - You know exactly. - You don't see Daisy out.

a huge under-representation of Daisy. - You can't say that Daisy Duck is like Shelly Miscavige when no one knows where Shelly Miscavige is and we all know-- - And no one knows where Daisy is. - She's in two places. The Mickey and Minnie Runaway Railway in Orlando and the one in Anaheim. We've seen her twice. - And we've seen what she does on the railway railroads. - The Shelly Miscavige thing is serious. The Daisy Duck thing is not. She's got her own publicist and she has a job. She's a dance teacher.

I think this is good. This is good. And then we were thinking, well, Chip and Dale. Goofy's got a fucked publicist. Like, it's a gooner. Goofy's publicist is a gooner. The publicist is a gooner or Goofy's a gooner? I think they're both gooners. Por que no los dos? What is that? What was that? I've been really saying it a lot lately. Por que no los dos? Josh has been saying that a lot due to his Spanish lessons, I guess. How are they going along? Oh, bueno.

She's obsessed with Ariana Grande. She's a Colombian lesbian. She's a Colombian lesbian living in Malta. That's cute. Sorry, how did it come up, Ariana? Did you tell her that you knew someone who knew her well? Did you expose this? It's me. Oftentimes it's like, what did you do this weekend? It's me.

Oftentimes it's like, what did you do this weekend? I'm like, fue a sabere noche en vivo. I went to Saturday Night Live and she's like, wait, Ariana Grande hosted. Did you meet her? And I go, well, yeah. I was like, she's sort of a friend. Conozco Ariana. Si. Wow. Somos amigas. Oh.

Your Spanish sounds fast. It sounds great. It's gotten better. It was one of my things after the accident that I was like, I want to reclaim this thing and be like, next time I go back to Mexico, I'm like, oh, remember last time you came and now you speak better Spanish? You know, like one of those where I was like, I need to come back and not feel like I'm coming back after the time that almost killed me. It's like, oh, I'm coming back cuntier at Spanish. And to learn more about the accident, go to Tata.com. Are you talking a lot about the accident in Tata? Yeah, it's sort of the last 20 minutes.

I love. And if you don't know what the accident is, you got to go to the show. The accident is profound. It's formative. Well, I know the culturistas girls, the Katie's, the publicist, the readers, they support Aaron and I in a deep and down way. Yes, they do. And they'll be coming to the Greenwich House Theater.

I know this. Sam Pinkleton directing Tony winning director. We don't need much more information. It's going to be incredible. It's going to be fantastic. We were joking that this appearance on Las Cotterias is for Josh Press. And he goes...

we should do it together, right? And I was like, yes, we did my novel one together too. - We decided, 'cause I am sort of doing a bunch of podcasts right now for this, and this is the only one we're doing together. And we truly were like, that's true forever. I think if Aaron's like truly like on an Oscar campaign to be the biggest actress in the world, we'll be like, well, but you'll do everything. - That's what I'm there for. - We'll accept being a mag on my Oscar campaign. - But we've sworn to never be on this podcast alone.

But what if your name is blackened in the gay village like Spacey? I think we will stick to each other. Well, that's actually for y'all then. If one of us becomes Spacey, it's like, well, are you going to book Spacey to get the other? I love the...

I love the sentence blackened in the gay village. Blackened in the gay village. There is a gay village. You must admit. And it's called Pines. I was going to say it's called P-Town. And it's called P-Town. And it's called Chelsea. Barracuda. It's called Chelsea. It's called Chelsea Hell's Kitchen.

It's called Chelsea Hell's Kitchen. So you're sort of cooked then for the rest of the summer. Yeah. It's been very fun as people are like, do you have any summer plans to go anywhere? I'm like, I'm actually traveling nowhere. I'm spending all summer treading the boards in the West Village. There's a romance to being like, I'm doing my off-Broadway show seven times a week and then I'm going to Via Corotta for a martini every night. You know what I mean? I'm living in that romance. Julie S.,

Or Temperance Wine Bar, we love. I'm living in the romance of being like a summer spinoff Broadway in the West Village. Great AC at the Greenwich House Theater. Don't worry, Aaron. Are you sensitive to that? You need AC. Yeah, I'm Texan. It's not going to be Twinks vs. Dolls. It's going to be well air-conditioned. And I want to say everyone should go to Twinks vs. Dolls and I'd love to come. I would love to go. If there's air-conditioning.

And it's not in some sort of bombed out place. I want to get a shirt soon that says, I can't, I have tech. Don't you think that'd be fun to make that my personality? I can't, I have tech. I'll somewhere make that my personality. You should do the dry erase border on your neck because you're on vocal rest. Love that. No, no.

For some reason, an image that flashed in my mind last night was Sadie Sink, her whole summer, just like, I guess I'm going home after the show. I'm not going out. Because I had the itch to go out last night, but I was like, you know who's not going out this summer? Sadie Sink.

Put some respect. She's got a lot. And she's a doll. Can I just say she's a doll? She is a doll. Because I've gotten to know her through Kimmy in the show. Oh, really? She's lovely. In that way where sometimes when a person is that famous, you're like, we felt this about Megan Thee Stallion. We're like, she can roll up and be a B-I-T-C-H down. And I'd be like, worth it because of your talent, because of your everything. And Megan Thee Stallion, the kindest person we've ever worked with. So lovely.

Sadie Sink. Nice as all damn hell. So fucking lovely. I believe that 100%. Looks you in the eyes, asking you questions, remembers things about you. You know what I mean? Like wonderful. And great in the show. And great in the show. Really good. And they all are. Every girl is great in this show. I'm telling you. True ensemble piece. And Elsa speaks to Sadie to me that I'm like, it's very cool that in this moment of like, you're a big deal. You're like, I want to do an ensemble piece that like involves a lot of other people, you know. And is about

What it's about. Yeah. I mean, I, that's what I left thinking being like, Oh, she really like, you know, swung the big stick she's got in the industry. And, you know, like in this way of highlighting this play, which is, I think going to be made much more popular if she, than if she hadn't. I agree. And actually I have a real request for Katie's and readers because Kimmy, who again is like,

rural Georgia girl and me rural North Carolina boy and it happens that her Broadway show is running this summer when my show is we always joke that we're like my dream is someone does a two show day and goes to see John Broctor imagine the freak who does a two show day of our two shows and one of your people will do that and if you do DM us because we want to celebrate you

Is John Proctor open-ended? Do we know? It's running through end of August right now. Sadie's leaving and they have this new girl whose name I'm forgetting, but she's fabulous. And it's through end of August right now. Love. And my show's through end of August. Sadie's leaving to do a Marvel. She's leaving to do a Marvel. She's leaving to do a Marvel. She's leaving to do a Marvel. Well, it's like you give them one, one for you, one for them. One for the bank account. One John Proctor as the villain, one Marvel.

And the Dr. Parker's the ones for them. I need a publicist to do both shows in one day. Now, do we settle who the big six were in Disney? Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Daisy, Goofy, Pluto. And do Goofy and Pluto have the same publicist? No. Pluto is Goofy's dog. God, you always forget. And do we think because Goofy is a dog, slave? Yeah.

slave. Well, that's so far as any pet is. Is that what you mean? Well, they're the same species, but one is... Ah, yes. One is owner, one is... Or man's best friend by Sabrina Carpenter. Or gay couple. Or gay couple. Pup play. Pup play. Goofy doesn't have a love interest, quote unquote. No, he doesn't. There's no Goofina. There's no Goofina.

- Huh. - Huh. - There's no, it's actually roller coaster number 30. - There's no Goofina. - There isn't a Goofina. - There is no Goofina. - Goofina. - There is no Goofina. - Bring us Goofina. - And doesn't even in Goofy movie, doesn't he have a kid, but no wife? - Yeah, and there's no Goofa. - There's no Goofa. - Who is related to Goofina?

Is she dead? Did his wife die? Sorry, there's Goofy, there's Goofina, Goofa. Goofa. That's his ex-girlfriend. That's his, oh. And she's all slutty. No, Goofa's their non-binary friend. Oh, Goofa. Oh, I see. And they're all slutty. They're Goofy's ex and they're non-binary. They're a slut. They're a fucking whore, gape, slut. Not gape. They're a fucking gape, whore, slut. Can we stop it with gape? I'm telling you. You want to stop the gapes?

Stop the gapes. Stop the steals. Stop the gapes. Mind the gapes. Mind the gapes. Mind the gapes. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Sure, sure, sure. Frozen gapes. What's your problem with gapes?

Did you see did you see that character on gay Twitter that was going around with the big asshole no character When I say character, I mean real human man who was like no and can I say to the earlier question? This is what you taught me. This is what you've taught me. This is what you've taught me. This is what you've taught me You have been

Because I knew you. I figured. I've been changed for good. The way she goes, for good. For good. I was just like, you just can't. You say, I've never been to New York. Never been to New York? Never been to New York before. There's a rumor she wants to come back to the boards.

Broadway? Yeah. The Irish boards? Yeah. Is that where she is? Maybe the West End. The North End. I don't think she's coming back to America. I really don't. If she did, what do you want to see her in? Well, she did for Redwood. Well, anything. Redwood. To be clear, I'd love this country to be safe enough for Rosie O'Donnell to be in it. Oh, God. All that aside, what do you want to see Rosie in? Gypsy. There, I said it. Gypsy. I want to see Gypsy Rosalie. But do you want to see her in Odd

Not for nothing, but that was really good. Someone tell me! Turn! Don't I get a dream for myself? I could kill the roll.

You could kill the role of a J-Wing. Do you know what actually is the role I was born to play? What? Norma Desmond, Nicole Scherzinger version. Oh. I actually would crush. You could tell a whole story with your eyes. You'd be good in that. If I ever get to do... Wait, do the camera the little eye moment when they pull in on her eyes. Do it to one of these. Yeah, the eyebrow lift, too. That's really good. Weird one. If I ever get... What's it? Broadway backwards or whatever? Whatever it is.

I will do that. Miscast? Miscast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're thinking of Broadway Bears. Oh, you should do it at Broadway Bears in the nude. Me in like all clothes, like a huge, really heavy garment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Singing with one look at Broadway Bears while everyone fucking starts crying. But you say with one gape. They're not even, they're not angry. They're crying because they're so mad. They're like, we paid so much money to watch Nick Adams. And like, we have fucking,

- I fucking never heard you singing with one look. - My college. - I hate it. - My college friend, Nick Adams. - Really? I didn't know that. - Angel. - You ever rubbed dicks? - No, no, no, no. - All right, well, that's a boring story. - And I wouldn't kiss and tell. - Oh yeah. - Yes you would. - Oh yeah? I never kiss and tell. - Roll tape. Roll tape. - It's a tape of him kissing and telling. - And then me being like, I'm kissing this person. - Hey. - I got something to tell you. - What's a time you really regretted hurting someone?

- When I didn't cast you in "Dicks the Musical." - Yeah, definitely that. - When I didn't cast you as neighbor number two, as Mr. Neighbor. - As Mixed Neighbor. - Could have been funny. - I don't know when I really regretted hurting you. - I threw sand in little girl's eyes when we were little. - Evil bitch? - Yeah, it was nasty. - What did she do to deserve that? - She was being some sort of way. And then she blamed the boy I was standing next to and he went to the principal's office.

And you weren't even at the beach. You just had to protect it. I can see the whole emotional landscape of this. She probably was picking on you because she liked you. You took sand in your hand, threw it in her face. She goes, it was the other boy still wanting to defend you. Still. Because she wanted, she was blinded. She was infatuated. Literally blinded. Yeah, well, I wasn't even talking about it like that. But yes, that part too. Little girl, I wish I had not thrown sand into your eyes.

You don't remember her name? Not at all. I don't even think we were in the same class. Oh. Where do you guys stand on saying people from high school's first and last name just because you know them? Depends. What do you mean, like, on air or just in your life? Yeah, sort of in life. In life, you have to. All of a sudden, they're living their life, and, like, they're, you know, going about their day, and someone goes, oh, my God, you were mentioned first.

Front and behind name. Front and behind name. Was it you, me, and Patrick Rogers were out together one time and somebody was like, oh, my good friend from Honors English, this girl I used to know in Honors English texted me. And then we were all like, I'm going to text my good friend from Honors English because the girls you met in Honors English. Everyone right now texts their friend from Honors English. We literally did this recently at a concert. Are we doing this now? I don't know if I made my exact guess.

- We'll do it as soon as it wraps. - And you have to say, God, thanks for being there. - No, no, no, here's what you have to do. Becca, bring in my phone. We're all gonna text a girl from high school honors. - No, I'm just gonna shout this person out. - No, no, no, and we're gonna see who gets a text back first. - No. - Who gets a text back first? - Why, 'cause you know you're not gonna win?

It is very out of the blue. I have not reached out to this person in 15 years. This is hence the bit. Okay, here comes Becca with the phone. Thank you, Becca. Okay, great. So you don't have your phone either? Jesus, do you? It's giving professional down. It's giving professional down. Three-way, three-way raise? What are we saying to them? Text a girl from high school English, go. What is the text? We say whatever you think. I'm just going to say back in New York.

Back in New York. Just wanted you to know I'm doing well. I book all the time. Random ass. Here, I'm saying random ass. Back in New York. When can we do berries? What are you going to say to yours? I'm saying happy belated birthday to Rescinded, the name of her child. Yeah.

Yay! I think I'm going to get a text back. This is so huge. And mind you, I didn't say that you couldn't have talked to this person in a long time. I just said there had to be a girl from high school English. And let me just say, I know we could have also fetched my phone and I could have participated, but then I wouldn't get to watch. I can't believe you guys are still texting. You could have just shut off something sweet. No, it's because it's been a long time and it is such a wild, like, what the fuck? It gave us such joy at this concert to text that person. It is kind of crazy to get a text from you, Bowen Yang. I don't know.

- No, but I'm just saying like, it's been like, I don't know. - It's been a decade. - It's been a decade. Last text I sent her June 25th, 2013. - Mine was- - Oh my God. - What? - Mine was on my birthday. 'Cause I got a birthday text from her. - I don't keep up with high school friends. - I don't, this one I would love to more, but I just don't. - But these women saved our lives. - Well, she's got her receipts on and I say she hasn't read it yet. - I just want to shout out Kayla Sturbach. She introduced me to Radiohead.

- Sam Marconi, you gotta get back to me. - King Kade Lowe, introduce me to Radiohead. - Melanie, my friend, I don't know if it was Radiohead, but she got me into Bjork. - Last name? - Erykah Badu. Melanie Chase back then. - See, those, behind every gay guy with good music taste is a straight girl in honors English who taught them those things. - Sam didn't teach me any cool things. - Sam didn't teach me any cool things.

But she was class president and I was the secretary. Oh, wow. Were you good at that? I was okay at that. I feel like I'd be horrible at that. We both won an award at our high school for being the top PE students. I went to prom with Kinkade Love. It was called the Suffolk Zone Award. Did any of you go to prom with these students?

Yes, I went to prom with her. I didn't go to prom, but I went to like a freshman or sophomore year dance. The Valentine's Day dance. As a gay guy, you needed the girl from Honors English who gave you cool music and would go with you to prom. So Pat Regan was the one who inspired this? No, Patrick Rogers. Patrick Rogers. But I can't remember why it came up.

I was maybe texting. I think I was talking about how Melanie got me into all my cool music. Maybe that was it. Oh yeah, we were having that conversation. We were having a weird girl night. We were like, we need all of you to text that girl. This is the thing about like... And say, I love you. I cherish you. I love you. I cherish you. A lot of gay men who moved to New York City. Mm-hmm.

Did the morning announcements. I did. I did the morning announcements. No way. I did. I did. I did the morning announcements. I did not. Three out of four of us. I did the morning announcements. Were either prom or homecoming royalty. I was. I was. Michael was. Michael was prom king. Michael was prom king. So I was homecoming. You were homecoming king and read the announcements and I was prom king and read the announcements?

I think we've been over this. No, I mean, we have, but now I'm just... For the sake of everyone new at home, I'm kind of like, wow, that's cool. And you're acting it like it's the first time. And you know Bowen Superlative was most likely to get on Saturday Night Live. Was it really? Yeah, but that was like the funny way of like funny as a class clown. I was second place for three things. Mine was most likely to do A21st movie musical. Wow, A21st? I guess we still have to see.

I guess we'll see if that happens at 8.24. Mine was most likely to be on Broadway. Fuck it.

Which I haven't done. What was yours? Most likely to be on Broadway. Love. I was second place for best dressed, most athletic, and attached at the hip with my bestie. I actually don't remember. I think it was Class Clown or something, but I don't remember. Sure. And then the third thing, Otter's English class girl who taught you cool music. Oh, yeah. That's like the common thread. Yeah. One out of three ain't bad.

I bet you have another one you're just remembering. Lead of plays feels very gay guy going to New York. Oh, wait. Oh, my God. Did she get back? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What'd she say? OMG, is this for real? Every time I see... Oh.

Oh, she's so... Wait, what did you say? Do you feel comfortable reading what you said? I said, random ass hello, it's Bowen. If you're ever in New York, please reach out and say, hey, hope all is well, Kayla. Heart emoji. And what did she say? OMG, is this for real? Every time I see you on screen, I get so excited you made it. I actually still have you saved in my phone. I'm so happy for you. I'll definitely reach out if I ever find myself out that way. Kayla!

I love you Kayla Sturback I can't believe Sam is flopping so hard So you made it a contest This sucks Sam Some of this was after the accident but some of it I think is just becoming the age we're becoming I've been a lot more wistful because I do feel like especially being like rural south and whatever I moved on from that period of my life and then I just don't think of it much and I've become very wistful for some of that and I've done a lot of this where I'll just like remember people and text and I'm doing a lot of that recently

It's good. I think it's very healthy to keep these connections. I love it. And to tell these people, like, you know, you did something. You did for me. I think you're right. Because I knew you. Because I knew you. I have been changed for good. For good. I've been changed for good. I really have. For good.

Because I knew you. We really, we need more of that. Has Rosie been on? No, I would love to have Rosie on. We need Rosie on. We need Rosie O'Donnell on.

on. We need Rosie on. I think it may have been a discussion at one point. You need to have Kimberly Bellflower and Rosie O'Donnell. I'm sure Rosie is a fan of yours and Rosie one time said a very nice comment about something I did. I bet she loves dicks. I was going to say there's a certain class of celebrity where I go, I wonder if they've seen dicks because I feel like they probably have.

And Rosie is one of them. You think she has? Don't you imagine? She loves musicals. I think she loves musicals. She loves all things gay. Yeah. She said a nice thing about I Love That For You. I could see her liking that. I loved that show. This is what you tell A24 marketing. Hey. A24. A24. Hey, Ariana Grande, huge fan of Dix the Musical. Yeah. Use that. Clip that. Clip that. Clip it. Clip it good. She was...

So put out the Blu-ray, A24. Ariana wants to buy it. You know what Ari loves? I've told you guys this. Desperate for your car. She kept saying that in her coloratura. Desperate for your car. That is an amazing lyric that you guys wrote. Give me that pussy. Nathan Lane saying it.

me that pussy. Ari and Cynthia were great on Drag Race. I haven't seen. It was fun. I haven't seen. Now, they filmed it before the first one came out. But everything was very clearly foregoing. It's funny to me. I just like how time works and the falseness of

Show business. Have we been over this in Bracket 2? Which like a moment that I think speaks to all four of us, which is when Bracket 2 first meets up in the work room, Lydia Butthole Collins goes to Mistress Isabel Brooks and goes, Mistress, it's so good to see you. And then Mistress goes, and it's interesting to see you. And it's interesting to see you.

I love Mistress. That whole practice was gonna be a fake bitch gagatronja. And it's interesting to see you. Interesting to see you. I'm like, I want to use that suit. The girl's really gay. I gotta tell you, who also ate this last episode up was the Ginger Minj. Should we, in For the Tour, like Chapel Roan, have a local drag queen open each show?

And so now let's pick from New York, Chicago, LA, and Orlando. Okay. Who are the Queens? New York, Bob, Bob, the original New York opening for us. Bob is local in LA. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

and for the tour. It's not what it's about. Bob opens New York. Chicago, Shea Coulee. Shea Coulee in Chicago. Oh my God, yeah. Hey, I love that. We better pay up. And we will. I'll tell you what, I think that is it. We will. Tickets are $3,000. We actually love to text people when we're having people do our improv shows. We always say, this is a paid opportunity.

Because it is. It is. It is actually. I enjoyed the chat. It's a cute chat. I think we should say that to these track readers. This is a paid opportunity. You're going to open for us probably what large venue we do this. Don't worry. This is a paid opportunity. This is a paid opportunity. It's so funny to me. Oh, LA, I want Delta work.

Delta War. It has to be Delta. She could open for us. Orlando Roxy Andrews, of course. Oh, yeah. The original. And Ginger Minj, double header. Double header. I mean, I never forget when me and Henry Kapurski ran into Roxy Andrews at Islands of Adventure. That's really special. It was really good stuff. I love that. Really good stuff.

Reckon you know the Brits? Tea, the Queen, saying things weird, bottle of water. Babes, did you know they make unbelievably good TV? Just hits different. The subtle shade disguises polite conversation. Cutest little villages, where three people die a week. It's giving unhinged, but cosy. And it's all on BritBox.

See it differently and start streaming the best of British TV with BritBox. Use promo code CULTURISTAS to get 50% off your first month when you sign up at BritBox.com. Terms and conditions apply. Summer is quickly approaching and there's no better time to make sure you're feeling your best.

Keep your gut health in check with the help of HealthAid Kombucha. It's powered with probiotics, which helps you feel less bloated. Plus, it's made with real fruit juice, so it's deliciously refreshing. With so many delicious flavors like Pink Lady Apple, Passion Fruit Tangerine, and Pomegranate Blueberry, it's the perfect bubbly beverage to enjoy as the weather heats up.

Look for the brown bottle with an anchor on it at a store near you. The Temptations brand, America's number one cat treat brand, is on a mission to show the world just how irresistible cat dads truly are and make 2025 the year of the cat dad. Cat dads have long been misunderstood, keeping them undervalued,

the radar. However, the Temptations brand knows that being a cat dad is a green flag, and they are some of the most irresistible, sensitive, and compassionate men of all. Cats aren't the only ones who find cat dads irresistible. In fact, two out of three Gen Z adults believe that cat dads make better bows. From athletes to musicians to gamers and scholars and everyone in between, Temptations brand knows that proud cat dads are living amongst us, and it's time they get their moment in the spotlight. A recent study found that 63% of Americans are

agree that men who own cats have been unfairly stereotyped by society and cat dads are most likely to associate positive attributes like compassionate, sensitive, in touch with their emotions with men who own cats. The Temptations brand knows there's nothing like the bond between a cat dad and their cat and the brand's variety of irresistible treats make cat dads even more irresistible.

Okay, wait.

I have to say, I had a home essential that I needed, Bowen, and I went to Wayfair.com and I got it. It is a vacuum cleaner. They had it. I got what I needed. Oh, of course they have it. It's not an off chance at all. It's an on chance, especially when it comes to everything in the home and outdoor. I bought some new outdoor pillows and an espresso sheen. Don't worry, that's indoors.

Wayfair's got everything you need to level up your outdoor space. They have patio sets and lounge chairs, outdoor bars and hot tubs, fire pits, gazebos, and of course, string lights. It's so easy to have a one-stop shop where you can make over your entire space with a resort feel without that resort price tag. And you can clean all your stuff, okay? Because like I said, I'm...

Letting loose with this vacuum cleaner. Yeah, it's a mealy. Okay, if you know, you know, they're good. There's something for every style in every home, no matter your space or budget. Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your summer home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget, including the outdoors. No more huge delivery fees for patio furniture. Get big stuff like patio sets, gazebos, hot tubs, outdoor dining sets, and more shipped free.

Don't wait. Make your outdoor space your dream oasis today with Wayfair and enjoy it all summer long. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop a huge outdoor selection. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair. Every style. Every home.

Well, I think it's time for I Don't Think So, Honey. I think it is time for I Don't Think So, Honey. This is our 60-second segment where we take some time, make it a 60 seconds. Like I just said, if you listened, and I can tell a lot of you aren't. A lot of you tuned us out a long time ago. Well, listen now. This next part's going to be good. Listen now. This is the part you came for. We ran into something in culture we don't love. I'm ready to go. This is Matt Rogers' I Don't Think So, Honey, and his time starts now.

I don't think so, honey. People having a problem because there are people out there that have a problem with Sabrina Carpenter's album cover being her getting walked around like a dog. Oh,

Let me tell you something. You're never going to look back on razzing one of these pop girlies about the subversive thing they're doing and feel good about it later. You got to let the girls be the girls. If you were one of Madonna's early critics, you're likely embarrassed now. If you're one of Gaga's early critics, you're likely embarrassed now at all. Sabrina counts as this. If she wants to get walked around like a dog and put it on the album cover, that was her empowered decision. I am short of it. And lots of people like to get walked around like dogs. All right. I actually have been

confronted with this myself sexually. It wasn't for me to walk the person around like a dog, but I celebrate that person. I know they're going to find an amazing partner. Just like I know Sabrina's going to find an amazing partner. I don't think she's looking for that when she put this album title together. I think she was looking for very much this discussion. And guess what? She won. You know who loses? All you losers who are criticizing her. You man-child.

Why don't you S-T-F-U? And that's one minute. I don't think so, honey. Really good. Very good. She's kind of a Pluto to Goofy. She's Pluto to Goofy. I think she should be able to be walked on a leash, off a leash. That guy who wraps himself in the carpet. I think Sabrina and Pluto have the same publicist. Yes. Sabrina and Pluto. Yes. That would be smart because they're negotiating different things. Blondes. They're blondes who walk around like dogs. Yeah. Mmm.

Can you believe though that people are literally like, I guess this is one of the things that they have to talk about now. I wasn't aware of this conversation honestly. Yeah, it's just like the album cover is her and it's like, it's called Man's Best Friend, the album, and she's on all fours and like someone's got a bunch of her hair in their hand. Cool. And it's like, and people are like, well, what about the messages sent to young girls? I'm like, are you actually saying that

Man is a non-gendered term. I think boy is non-gendered. Man is non-gendered. Sis, girl, these are all non-gendered terms. Who knows who's best friend she is? It's not her responsibility to be a good role model. Friend is ungendered. Best is gendered. Best is she, her. Eve, best. She, her. I don't mean to be this person, but I feel like this discourse coming out while World War III is starting is also...

So kind of it's like, what's going on? What are we doing? Well, I mean, like, I do think it's gotten to the point now where in the like effort to talk about anything else other than whatever horrors. And by the way, we are recording this a couple of weeks before this comes out. So we may have experienced more horrors.

Nice to meet you. But, like, it's kind of just, like, the desperation is jumping out in terms of, like, finding other things to talk about. And this is just so stupid because we've had the conversation a million fucking times. Like, she is...

outside of this thing of like, what's she going to mean to young girls? She is like an artist who is empowered to do little coca. And also like she said in Rolling Stone, like it's not her that's making the songs popular. It's her that's making the songs quality. You are making them popular by consuming them. And so if you have a problem with it, stop consuming it. You just refuse to do that because you always be streaming Sabrina. You can't help it. Did you watch The Idol? The Weeknd's The Idol? I did not. No. The little girl.

Star Lily Rose Lily Rose her She released an album cover. This is fictional. Mm-hmm Pick leaked of her with cum on her face Okay, and then Troye Sivan is like let's make that the album cover babes So right in a fictional world a girl had come all over her face and album. You never find me being like never forget People did this to me in my album when the cover was my gape. I

Yeah. And look at them now. You're that character from Twitter. I'm that character from Twitter. And they said, what about what this is saying to young girls? And I said, who? Yeah, I don't care. This isn't for young girls. Speaking of cum, this kind of segues nicely into my own. Perfect. So this is Bowen Yang's I Don't Think So Honey. His time starts now. I Don't Think So Honey when cum mixes with water. Then it becomes little rubber bullets. Now you work with ice.

Oh, okay, honey. I see. You got to pick a consistency and stick with it. I don't like that it becomes hard and little rubbery. Congeals. It congeals into these little balls. You will never be Flubber. Yes.

You will never co-star with Robin Williams. May he rest in peace. And pick a color besides white. White, very first thought. You could have been green. You could have been flubber. But you will never be. Come when it mixes with water. I don't like it.

speaking of Spacey, when I jerk off in the shower, I don't want to do that anymore because the cum gets all weird. American Beauty. It's an American Beauty reference. And God, what else? Ha ha ha!

- What's the big pop culture moment that Cum has had? Something about Mary? - Yeah, Monica Lewinsky, five seconds. - White House intern's dress. You gotta pick-- - Jeffrey Toobin. - That was all the '90s. You haven't had a big moment since the '90s. - That's true. - And that's one minute. - Cum, you will never be Flubber. - Cum, you will never be Flubber. - You're stuck in the '90s, not like Flubber. - The thing that gets lost about Flubber is that Flubber was actually just trying to be helpful. - Thank you. - That's the thing, and he didn't, it's like you created an incredible assistant.

I mean, they wanted to lift the mood. They wanted to create a better work environment. They wanted to get things done quickly. That was the idea of the invention was lift the mood. Like was to lift the mood. I can't remember. I've seen the film. I can't quite recall. I think the plot of the film was...

He created Flubber and Flubber was just trying to party. Mind of its own. Flubber was just trying to party and also like, I don't know, like be around. That's actually what's fucked up about Cum. That Cum is so like, oh, shoot me. It's fun. It feels good. Ha ha ha. It's also like, use me to make your family.

Right. Which is it? But also I'll ruin your sheets. Yeah. And also I'll ruin your sheets. And get caught in the arm hair with the water. Caught in the arm hair with the water. Despicable. You've been fucking in a tub lately or in a pool. Yeah, what's going on with that? I don't know where this comes from. You've been fucking in the tub lately. Fucking in the tub?

- No. - Where does this come from? - Tell us where the cum comes from. - Actually hasn't happened in a while, but it's one of those, it's just terrible. - Oh yeah, it's terrible. - The first time it happened, you encountered this, you were like, what the fuck? - Well, it should wash off. You're like, okay, now I see it. - Yes, no. - But it still won't go. - I jacked off in a hot tub years ago and saw this with my own two eyes. And I was like, well, if that's what happens, that's the last time for that. - You think you're sick. You think something's wrong with you. - If that's what happens, that's the last time for that. - Yeah, I said that'll be it. - And reader, it wasn't.

No, I think it was. I don't make really a habit of doing it in the shower. You were fucking by the river. Yeah. Yeah, but we can't ever tell what happened to that cum because it never came out of the sky. Right. Yours is long gone. It was right into the sky. It did not come down. I actually didn't know that he knows he's big bro. He knows. I'm sure someone has listened to, you know, they've got detectives out there. Hey, are you the guy that fucked Matt Rogers in 2021? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- What a year. - Down by the river. - Down by the river. - You might just be big bro. Gotta text him after this. What was I, I was gonna say something interesting. - Everybody text big bro right now. - Everybody text big bro and see who gets the text back first. - Who gets the response to you first. - Text your king top. - I will say, here's the only bodily thing that is allowed to ruin my sheets. Poop and shit. - And even that doesn't ruin it. You can get that out. - Bleach that out. - No, no, no. - You need OxyClean. - Yeah, you need Oxy.

But you say, when that happens, you say, God bless, I don't mind. I say... And this happens to you every morning, you're saying? And it's permissible. It's not happening to other people. And it's permissible. Poop. Poop. Do you guys think that... We can see poop. We can see poop. We can see poop. Do you guys think out of bone and ice friendship that he's the top and I'm the bottom? Out of your friend... Friendship top, friendship bottom. Who's the top and who's the bottom? God, my gut...

- You're the top, but I don't know if that's right. I'm just going with my gut. - I think Matt's the top. - Yeah. - I'm gonna go top bottom. - I'm a chic, chill bottom. - Chic, chill bottom. - What's the lyric? ♪ Jared says we're both bottoms for each other ♪ ♪ Who's the top, who's the bottom in our friendship ♪ ♪ Do you think ♪ - Two tops. - Two tops. - Y'all are two tops, we're two bottoms. - No brains, no skills. - Never the twain shall meet. - Never the twain. - Never the twink shall meet. - Never the twink. - Never the twain shall twink.

So what do you think? I have one. I got to get one. I have one. Yes, I'm ready. All right. Well, this is Josh Sharps. I don't think so, honey. His time starts now. I don't think so. People who I don't think so, honey. No people. Let's take it from the top. That was insulting. No, keep all that in because that was insulting. You've been on the show for nine years. A pro.

Fuck up so bad. It's inspiring. Let's take it from the top. All right. This doesn't happen during the off-roadway play. I have a very good one. Okay. This is Josh Sharps. I don't think so, honey. His time starts now. I don't think so, honey. People who don't like the things I like. I like things. Yes. And when the things that I like happen, I like that. The feeling I feel is like. Yeah. So if someone doesn't,

does something I like, maybe I join in because I like that thing too. Or even if the circumstances don't allow me to join in, I like that they're doing the thing I like. Don't do it. When people do something I don't like, I feel disliked. I am frustrated. I am annoyed. I don't like that. Why are you doing this thing I don't like? You could just do the things that I like. Dude,

Do better. So I implore you when you are around me and honestly, even when you aren't. Yeah. Because behind closed doors, you're your most true self. Do things I love.

like. Listen up, honey. Don't do things I dislike. I wish to feel like. I do not want to be clouded by dislike in my day-to-day life. All of you need to do things that I like when you are around me, and even if not, I like what I like, and you should too. And that's one minute. That was powerful. That was so good. That was poetry. Poetry. That was poetry. That

That's going to have a lot of people thinking. What are examples of things that you like? Things that I like are like things that I like. Yeah. And the things I don't like, ooh, girl. You better not be doing those. Don't do them because those are the things I don't like. And you won't like that. And I will not like that. Whereas I like when you do things I like. Yeah. You know what's good about all of us? We all know the things that each other likes that we just don't and we don't push it. Of course not. Like I told you when you guys were vibing out to Bjork at,

at all. I just, I sat and enjoyed our joy. Yeah. And I started to feel a little sick at that moment.

- 'Cause of the drugs, not because of our joy. - No, that was because of other things. - Oh. - Remember? - Oh. - That was when I got whole fever. - GRD, yeah. - That was whole fever. - That was a great trip. - That was a whole other era. - Whole. - Whole other era. Gabe. - All right, Aaron, do you have an "I Don't Think So Honey"? - I have one. It came to me. - All right. This is Aaron Jackson's "I Don't Think So Honey's" time starts now. - Don't forget, honey. - God, girl, don't forget. - Good God, girl. Get out. - I'm ready. - This is Aaron Jackson's "I Don't Think So Honey's" time starts now.

I don't think so, honey. Why has no one started a business that's like a ride share? Like it's like a limo that you ride in with your friends, except it's in a hearse and it's really spooky. Oh.

I don't think so. I think there'd be a coffin in there and it could pop up and scare you and there's dry ice. Andrew Durant. Andrew Durant could get high if the show ever closes, which it won't. He could be the dead outlaw. 30 seconds. And the driver could be kind of Dracula and say, would you like to roll the window? Yes.

It could be from six feet under. And there's dry ice in your drink, spooky cocktails. And there's all sorts of spider webs everywhere. And I just think that this is a business opportunity that could go year round, but certainly around Halloween or the fall, it could take you to a haunted house. It's pretty all year round. All year round. Five seconds. And I just think it's a really...

strong idea and I need somebody to do it. I don't think so. I love that. Honey, say honey. Honey, thank you. I'm sure this exists. You think you're sure? I think it's like, you're looking for essentially like a mobile haunted experience. A haunted car. A haunted limo. But in a hearse. I think it's bigger than that. It's haunted sometimes. And sometimes it's, uh,

Lauren from... Lauren Ambrose. If you take away some of your specifics, I think you'd be really excited to find out that this is a thing. I don't want to take away my specifics. My specifics are what make us us and make us unique. Yes. Especially during Pride Month. I shouldn't have said that, especially during Pride Month. When the powers that be are trying to take away all of our specifics? You'd think it could be a long hearse.

along with cocktails and cobwebs. Now I was saying in the middle of that escape car as an escape room, but car. - Yeah. - Oh. - And that's just not, just jumping out of a car. - That's just jumping out of a car. But I think there should be an escape room that is themed to you're kidnapped in the trunk. - There are so many possibilities for this business. - But that's different than what I want. - I know it's very different. - But it's a potential revenue stream.

- Sure. - It's just the idea is so good. - I'm not a businessman. I'm an artist. So I don't have the capabilities to make this. - If this bought you a dog walker, you would. - And a beautiful place to board the animal when I travel to Paris or other places. - Could we just rent? - And you want a dog walker slave like Pluto? - That's what you were saying? - No, I'm saying Pluto is a slave to Goofy because they're the same species. - And you want a dog walker slave because they'd be the same species as you. And yet they have to walk your dogs. - No, 'cause they get paid.

Okay. I don't think Kuda's getting paid. We don't know if it's enough. Do you think the person... But that's why I wanted to get rich. It makes sense. I hope the person walking Sabrina got paid. I think so. I think so. I think probably that was like... Dog walkers should be paid. Yeah. Also...

Dogs are very empowered. Dogs are very happy. They're some of the most empowered creatures we have. They like to obey. Maggie is... Sub is Dom. Sub is Dom. Maggie, the dog that we met today, darling dog. Can we just send Maggie in for the last part of the episode? Can we fly in there on camera? Let's get Maggie to sign a release. This won't make the dog nervous at all to be around us. Let's stick Maggie's paw in ink and put it on a release. Oh.

And then let's get Maggie in here. While they're getting Maggie in here, does anyone have anything final they want to say? Yes, I would love for you to come see. Come on, baby. Come on, Maggie. Maggie. Hi, Maggie.

- Hi girl, come say hi to us. - Oh my God, so sweet. - This is a beautiful beast. - She's so sweet. - Oh my God. - Now are any of the cameras getting this? - She's presenting. - She's presenting. Come Maggie. - Maggie, come over here. - Maggie, come over here. - Maggie. - Come on little one. - Oh, you're too good. - Hi Maggie. - Oh, stretch out when you lay down. - And that's where Downward Dog comes from, just so y'all know.

We woke her up, you guys. Oh, shit. Oh, sorry. They all sleep 17 hours a day. Yeah. Yeah. And they love to be woken up when they see their friends. You know, Maggie just turned five. She's 35. 35. Oh, my God. That's your age, right? Same Z's girl. So you want AC at Twinks vs. Dolls 2, don't you? You know, I think too, I wonder how Maggie would respond for us singing one of our songs from For the Tour. That would be good. To end the episode.

Maggie. Should we do mezzo piano for once? Yeah, mezzo piano. Maggie, this one is going to go out to you, girl. And basically, we want you to know you're perfect just the way you are, which doesn't necessarily have to be a good transition. Understood. Usually it's like just the way

And you're a man. Yeah, Bruno Mars. But what is it? I was going to do Billy Joel. I love you just the way. Here we go. If it's before the tour. Yeah, it's before the tour. Bang, bang. I shot you down. I hit the ground. Bang, bang. That awful sound. Bang, bang.

My baby shot me down. Season's play. Bye. Bye. Bye.

And our music is by Henry Kaburski.

Basically, Klarna lets you be that financially stable icon you know you are.

Summer is quickly approaching and there's no better time to make sure you're feeling your best.

Keep your gut health in check with the help of HealthAid Kombucha. It's powered with probiotics, which helps you feel less bloated. Plus, it's made with real fruit juice, so it's deliciously refreshing. With so many delicious flavors like Pink Lady Apple, Passion Fruit Tangerine, and Pomegranate Blueberry, it's the perfect bubbly beverage to enjoy as the weather heats up. Look for the brown bottle with an anchor on it at a store near you. You're not at your house. You're at a lavish seaside estate.

You're not walking the dog. You're hunting for clues in an Agatha Christie mystery. See it differently with BritBox. Stream an endlessly entertaining collection of British TV, including new original series, Ludwig, starring David Mitchell. A bit awkward, really. I think I might just have solved a murder. And outrageous, a scandalous true story. Seems there's a political extremist in every family these days. See it differently when you stream the best of British TV with BritBox.

Matt, I know you agree with me, but I've always felt that it's important to set standards for yourself. I think standards are, yeah, important. Yes, I think I do agree. I think I have a standard of living and a standard of loving.

I should have a better standard of loving. Joke, joke, joke. Joke, joke, joke. Anyway, the standard Lexus has set for themselves, it's to experience amazing. Lexus's benchmarks are feelings like exhilaration and joy when you're behind the wheel. A feeling in drivers that their car was built in anticipation of them. Because a car that doesn't make you feel something is a car that stops short of amazing. Experience amazing at your Lexus dealer. This is an iHeart Podcast.