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cover of episode How to avoid getting attached too quickly

How to avoid getting attached too quickly

2023/5/29
logo of podcast Date Yourself Instead

Date Yourself Instead
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Lyss
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我过去常常过快地依恋上那些并不喜欢我的人，并为此陷入幻想，最终发现这只是我的一厢情愿。这段经历让我明白，过快依恋的根源在于对自身价值的低估和缺乏清晰的界限感。我将那些人的友好对待误解为承诺，并沉溺于对未来关系的幻想，忽略了现实中对方并不重视我的事实。我曾多次将对方的‘男友行为’误解为承诺，而实际上他们只是在做一些最低限度的付出，目的可能是为了获得更多性关系。我意识到，过快依恋源于我内心的空虚和对自身价值的低估。当我的生活充实时，我便不会过快地依恋他人。 避免过快依恋的关键在于了解自己的价值，设定清晰的界限，并以更加现实的眼光看待对方。不要试图改变对方，也不要将对方的友好对待误认为是承诺。当对方没有明确表达承诺，只是友好相待时，要警惕自己是否过快依恋。要重视自己的直觉，保护好自己的内心，避免反复受伤。只有当我们足够爱自己，了解自己的价值，才能避免错误的关系，找到真正适合自己的伴侣。

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The speaker reflects on her tendency to get overly attached to people early on, only to realize they were not who she thought they were, leading to a discussion on the pitfalls of getting attached too quickly.

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It's easy to get attached to someone we've just met...because they're nice. Because they're attractive and treat us right. But how soon is too soon to get attached? Often times I'd become so fixated on one person early on, only to realize it was all smoke and mirrors. This person was not at all who I thought they were. So here's an episode talking about that experience, and how to avoid getting attached too fast. If you loved this episode, dm me on instagram @lyss or @dateyourselfinstead and share it with a friend. Xoxo.